第19章

theycotnofriendts!Theycotnomoneytopribeyou，todreatyou!\" Theofficerliftedhisclub，andtheoldmanthrewhisleftarmuptoshieldhishead。ConradrecognizedZindau，andnowhesawtheemptysleevedangleintheairoverthestumpofhiswrist。Heheardashotinthatturmoilbesidethecar，andsomethingseemedtostrikehiminthebreast。Hewasgoingtosaytothepoliceman:\"Don\'tstrikehim!He\'sanoldsoldier!Youseehehasnohand!\"buthecouldnotspeak，hecouldnotmovehistongue。Thepolicemanstoodthere；hesawhisface: itwasnotbad，notcruel；itwaslikethefaceofastatue，fixed，perdurable——amereimageofirresponsibleandinvoluntaryauthority。 ThenConradfellforward，piercedthroughtheheartbythatshotfiredfromthecar。 Marchheardtheshotashescrambledoutofhiscar，andatthesamemomenthesawLindaudropundertheclubofthepoliceman，wholefthimwherehefellandjoinedtherestofthesquadinpursuingtherioters。 Thefightingroundthecarintheavenueceased；thedriverwhippedhishorsesintoagallop，andtheplacewasleftempty。 Marchwouldhavelikedtorun；hethoughthowhiswifehadimploredhimtokeepawayfromtherioting；buthecouldnothaveleftLindaulyingthereifhewould。Somethingstrongerthanhiswilldrewhimtothespot，andtherehesawConrad，deadbesidetheoldman。 VI。 InthecareswhichMrs。Marchsharedwithherhusbandthatnightshewassupportedpartlybyprinciple，butmainlybythe，potentexcitementwhichbewilderedConrad\'sfamilyandtookallrealityfromwhathadhappened。 ItwasnearlymidnightwhentheMarchesleftthemandwalkedawaytowardtheElevatedstationwithFulkerson。Everythinghadbeendone，bythattime，thatcouldbedone；andFulkersonwasnotwithoutthatsatisfactioninthebusiness-likedespatchofallthedetailswhichattendseachstepinsuchanaffairandhelpstomakedeathtolerableeventothemostsorelystricken。Wearecreaturesofthemoment；welivefromonelittlespacetoanother；andonlyoneinterestatatimefillsthese。Fulkersonwascheerfulwhentheygotintothestreet，almostgay；andMrs。Marchexperiencedareboundfromherdepressionwhichshefeltthatsheoughtnottohaveexperienced。Butshecondonedtheoffencealittleinherself，becauseherhusbandremainedsoconstantinhisgravity；and，pendingthefinalaccountinghemustmakeherforhavingbeenwherehecouldbeofsomuchusefromthefirstinstantofthecalamity，shewastenderly，gratefullyproudofalltheusehehadbeentoConrad\'sfamily，andespeciallyhismiserableoldfather。Tohermind，Marchwastheprincipalactorinthewholeaffair，andmuchmoreimportantinhavingseenitthanthosewhohadsufferedinit。Infact，hehadsufferedincomparably。 \"Well，well，\"saidFulkerson。\"They\'llgetalongnow。We\'vedoneallwecould，andthere\'snothingleftbutforthemtobearit。Ofcourseit\'sawful，butIguessit\'llcomeoutallright。Imean，\"headded，\"they\'llpullthroughnow。\" \"Isuppose，\"saidMarch，\"thatnothingisputonusthatwecan\'tbear。 ButIshouldthink，\"hewenton，musingly，\"thatwhenGodseeswhatwepoorfinitecreaturescanbear，hemmedroundwiththiseternaldarknessofdeath，Hemustrespectus。\" \"Basil!\"saidhiswife。Butinherheartshedrewnearertohimforthewordsshethoughtsheoughttorebukehimfor。 \"Oh，Iknow，\"hesaid，\"weschoolourselvestodespisehumannature。 ButGoddidnotmakeusdespicable，andIsay，whateverendHemeantusfor，Hemusthavesomesuchthrillofjoyinouradequacytofateasafatherfeelswhenhissonshowshimselfaman。WhenIthinkwhatwecanbeifwemust，Ican\'tbelievetheleastofusshallfinallyperish。\" \"Oh，IreckontheAlmightywon\'tscoopanyofus，\"saidFulkerson，withapietyofhisown。 \"Thatpoorboy\'sfather!\"sighedMrs。March。\"Ican\'tgethisfaceoutofmysight。Helookedsomuchworsethandeath。\" \"Oh，deathdoesn\'tlookbad，\"saidMarch。\"It\'slifethatlookssoinitspresence。Deathispeaceandpardon。IonlywishpooroldLindauwasaswelloutofitasConradthere。\" \"Ah，Lindau!Hehasdoneharmenough，\"saidMrs。March。\"Ihopehewillbecarefulafterthis。\" MarchdidnottrytodefendLindauagainsthertheoryofthecase，whichinexorablyheldhimresponsibleforConrad\'sdeath。 \"Lindau\'sgoingtocomeoutallright，Iguess，\"saidFulkerson。\"Hewasfirst-ratewhenIsawhimatthehospitalto-night。\"HewhisperedinMarch\'sear，atachancehegotinmountingthestationstairs:\"Ididn\'tliketotellyouthereatthehouse，butIguessyou\'dbetterknow。TheyhadtotakeLindau\'sarmoffneartheshoulder。Smashedalltopiecesbytheclubbing。\" Inthehouse，vainlyrichandfoolishlyunfitforthem，thebereavedfamilywhomtheMarcheshadjustleftlingeredtogether，andtriedtogetstrengthtopartforthenight。Theywereallspentwiththefatiguethatcomesfromheaventosuchmiseryastheirs，andtheysatinatorporinwhicheachwaitedfortheothertomove，tospeak。 Christinemoved，andMelaspoke。Christineroseandwentoutoftheroomwithoutsayingaword，andtheyheardhergoingup-stairs。ThenMelasaid: \"Ireckontherestofusbetterbegoun\'too，father。Here，let\'sgitmotherstarted。\" Sheputherarmroundhermother，toliftherfromherchair，buttheoldmandidnotstir，andMelacalledMrs。Mandelfromthenextroom。 Betweenthemtheyraisedhertoherfeet。 \"Ain\'tthereanybodyagoin\'tosetupwithit?\"sheasked，inherhoarsepipe。\"Itappearslikefolkshain\'tgotanyfeelin\'sinNewYork。 Woon\'tsomeo\'theneighborscomeandoffertosetup，withoutwaitin\'tobeasked?\" \"Oh，that\'sallright，mother。Themen\'llattendtothat。Don\'tyoubotherany，\"Melacoaxed，andshekeptherarmroundhermother，withtenderpatience。 \"Why，Mely，child!Ican\'tfeelrighttohaveitlefttohirelin\'sso。 Butthereain\'tanybodyanymoretoseethingsdoneastheyought。IfCoonrodwason\'yhere——\" \"Well，mother，youareprettymixed!\"saidMela，withastrongtendencytobreakintoherlargeguffaw。Butshecheckedherselfandsaid: \"Iknowjusthowyoufeel，though。Itkeepsacomun\'andagoun\'；andit\'ssoanditain\'tso，allatonce；that\'stheplagueofit。Well，father! Ain\'tyougoun\'tocome?\" \"I\'mgoin\'tostay，Mela，\"saidtheoldman，gently，withoutmoving。 \"Getyourmothertobed，that\'sagoodgirl。\" \"Yougoin\'tosetupwithhim，Jacob?\"askedtheoldwoman。 \"Yes，\'Liz\'beth，I\'llsetup。Yougotobed。\" \"Well，Iwill，Jacob。AndIbelieveit\'lldoyougoodtosetup。 IwishedIcouldsetupwithyou；butIdon\'tseemtohavethestren\'thIdidwhenthetwinsdied。Imustgitmysleep，so\'sto——Idon\'tlikeverywelltohaveyoubrokeofyourrest，Jacob，buttheredon\'tappeartobeanybodyelse。Youwouldn\'thavetodoitifCoonrodwashere。 ThereIgoag\'in!Mercy!mercy!\" \"Well，docomealong，then，mother，\"saidMela；andshegotheroutoftheroom，withMrs。Mandel\'shelp，andupthestairs。 Fromthetoptheoldwomancalleddown，\"YoutellCoonrod——\"Shestopped，andheheardhergroanout，\"MyLord!myLord!\" Hesat，onesilenceinthedining-room，wheretheyhadalllingeredtogether，andinthelibrarybeyondthehirelingwatchersat，anothersilence。Thetimepassed，butneithermoved，andthelastnoiseinthehouseceased，sothattheyheardeachotherbreathe，andthevague，remoterumorofthecityinvadedtheinnerstillness。Itgrewloudertowardmorning，andthenDryfoosknewfromthewatcher\'sdeeperbreathingthathehadfallenintoadoze。 Hecreptbyhimtothedrawing-room，wherehissonwas；theplacewasfulloftheawfulsweetnessoftheflowersthatFulkersonhadbrought，andthatlayabovethepulselessbreast。Theoldmanturnedupaburnerinthechandelier，andstoodlookingonthemajesticserenityofthedeadface。 Hecouldnotmovewhenhesawhiswifecomingdownthestairwayinthehall。Shewasinherlong，whiteflannelbedgown，andthecandleshecarriedshookwithhernervoustremor。Hethoughtshemightbewalkinginhersleep，butshesaid，quitesimply，\"Iwokeup，andIcouldn\'tgittosleepag\'inwithoutcomin\'tohavealook。\"Shestoodbesidetheirdeadsonwithhim。\"well，he\'sbeautiful，Jacob。Hewastheprettiestbaby!Andhewasalwaysgood，Coonrodwas；I\'llsaythatforhim。 Idon\'tbelieveheevergivemeaminute\'scareinhiswholelife。 IreckonIlikedhimaboutthebestofallthechildren；butIdon\'tknowasIeverdonemuchtoshowit。Butyouwasalwaysgoodtohim，Jacob； youalwaysdonethebestforhim，eversincehewasalittlefeller。 Iusedtobeafraidyou\'dspoilhimsometimesinthemdays；butIguessyou\'regladnowforeverytimeyoudidn\'tcrosshim。Idon\'tsupposesincethetwinsdiedyoueverhithimalick。\"Shestoopedandpeeredcloserattheface。\"Why，Jacob，what\'sthattherebyhisporeeyeDryfoossawit，too，thewoundthathehadfearedtolookfor，andthatnowseemedtoreddenonhiseight。Hebrokeintoalow，waveringcry，likeachild\'sindespair，likeananimal\'sinterror，likeasoul\'sintheanguishofremorse。 VII。 Theeveningafterthefuneral，whiletheMarchessattogethertalkingitover，andmakingapproaches，throughitsshadow，tothequestionoftheirownfuture，whichitinvolved，theywerestartledbythetwitteroftheelectricbellattheirapartmentdoor。Itwasreallynotsolateasthechildren\'shavinggonetobedmadeitseem；butatnineo\'clockitwastoolateforanyprobablevisitorexceptFulkerson。Itmightbehe，andMarchwasgladtopostponetheimpendingquestiontohiscuriosityconcerningtheimmediatebusinessFulkersonmighthavewithhim。Hewenthimselftothedoor，andconfrontedtherealadydeeplyveiledinblackandattendedbyaverydecorousserving-woman。 \"Areyoualone，Mr。March——youandMrs。March?\"askedthelady，behindherveil；and，ashehesitated，shesaid:\"Youdon\'tknowme!MissVance\"；andshethrewbackherveil，showingherfacewanandagitatedinthedarkfolds。\"Iamveryanxioustoseeyou——tospeakwithyouboth。 MayIcomein?\" \"Why，certainly，MissVance，\"heanswered，stilltoomuchstupefiedbyherpresencetorealizeit。 Shepromptlyentered，andsaying，withaglanceatthehallchairbythedoor，\"Mymaidcansithere?\"followedhimtotheroomwherehehadlefthiswife。 Mrs。Marchshowedherselfmorecapableofcopingwiththefact。ShewelcomedMissVancewiththelikingtheybothfeltforthegirl，andwiththesympathywhichhertroubledfaceinspired。 \"Iwon\'ttireyouwithexcusesforcoming，Mrs。March，\"shesaid，\"foritwastheonlythingleftformetodo；andIcomeatmyaunt\'ssuggestion。\"Sheaddedthisasifitwouldhelptoaccountforhermoreontheconventionalplane，andshehadtheinstinctivegoodtastetoaddressherselfthroughouttoMrs。Marchasmuchaspossible，thoughwhatshehadtosaywasmainlyforMarch。\"Idon\'tknowhowtobegin——Idon\'tknowhowtospeakofthisterribleaffair。ButyouknowwhatImean。 IfeelasifIhadlivedawholelifetimesinceithappened。Idon\'twantyoutopitymeforit，\"shesaid，forestallingapolitenessfromMrs。March。\"I\'mthelastonetobethoughtof，andyoumustn\'tmindmeifItrytomakeyou。IcametofindoutallofthetruththatIcan，andwhenIknowjustwhatthatisIshallknowwhattodo。Ihavereadtheinquest；it\'sallburnedintomybrain。ButIdon\'tcareforthat—— formyself:youmustletmesaysuchthingswithoutmindingme。Iknowthatyourhusband——thatMr。Marchwasthere；Ireadhistestimony；andI wishedtoaskhim——toaskhim——\"Shestoppedandlookeddistractedlyabout。\"Butwhatfolly!Hemusthavesaideverythingheknew——hehadto。\"Hereveswanderedtohimfromhiswife，onwhomshehadkeptthemwithinstinctivetact。 \"Isaideverything——yes，\"hereplied。\"Butifyouwouldliketoknow——\" \"PerhapsIhadbettertellyousomethingfirst。Ihadjustpartedwithhim——itcouldn\'thavebeenmorethanhalfanhour——infrontofBrentano\'s；hemusthavegonestraighttohisdeath。Weweretalking，andI——Isaid，Whydidn\'tsomeonegoamongthestrikersandpleadwiththemtobepeaceable，andkeepthemfromattackingthenewmen。IknewthathefeltasIdidaboutthestrikers:thathewastheirfriend。Didyousee——doyouknowanythingthatmakesyouthinkhehadbeentryingtodothat?\" \"Iamsorry，\"Marchbegan，\"Ididn\'tseehimatalltill——tillIsawhimlyingdead。\" \"Myhusbandwastherepurelybyaccident，\"Mrs。Marchputin。\"Ihadbeggedandentreatedhimnottogonearthestrikinganywhere。Andhehadjustgotoutofthecar，andsawthepolicemanstrikethatwretchedLindau——he\'sbeensuchananxietytomeeversincewehavehadanythingtodowithhimhere；myhusbandknewhimwhenhewasaboyintheWest。 Mr。Marchcamehomefromitallperfectlyprostrated；itmadeusallsick!Nothingsohorribleevercameintoourlivesbefore。Iassureyouitwasthemostshockingexperience。\" MissVancelistenedtoherwiththatlookofpatiencewhichthosewhohaveseenmuchoftherealsufferingoftheworld——thedailyportionofthepoor——haveforthenervouswoesofcomfortablepeople。Marchhunghishead；heknewitwouldbeuselesstoprotestthathisshareofthecalamitywas，bycomparison，infinitesimallysmall。 AftershehadheardMrs。Marchtotheendevenofherrepetitions，MissVancesaid，asifitwereamerematterofcoursethatsheshouldhavelookedtheaffairup，\"Yes，IhaveseenMr。Lindauatthehospital——\" \"Myhusbandgoeseverydaytoseehim，\"Mrs。Marchinterrupted，togive。 afinaltouchtotheconceptionofMarch\'smagnanimitythroughout。 \"Thepoormanseemstohavebeeninthewrongatthetime，\"saidMissVance。 \"Icouldalmostsayhehadearnedtherighttobewrong。He\'samanofthemostgenerousinstincts，andahighidealofjustice，ofequity——toohightobeconsideredbyapolicemanwithaclubinhishand，\"saidMarch，withabolddefianceofhiswife\'sdifferentopinionofLindau。 \"It\'sthepoliceman\'sbusiness，Isuppose，toclubtheidealwhenhefindsitincitingariot。\" \"Oh，Idon\'tblameMr。Lindau；Idon\'tblamethepoliceman；hewasasmuchamereinstrumentashisclubwas。IamonlytryingtofindouthowmuchIamtoblamemyself。IhadnothoughtofMr。Dryfoos\'sgoingthere——ofhisattemptingtotalkwiththestrikersandkeepthemquiet； Iwasonlythinking，aswomendo，ofwhatIshouldtrytodoifIwereaman。 Butperhapsheunderstoodmetoaskhimtogo——perhapsmywordssenthimtohisdeath。\" Shehadasortofcalminhercouragetoknowtheworsttruthastoherresponsibilitythatforbadeanywishtoflatterheroutofit。\"I\'mafraid，\"saidMarch，\"thatiswhatcanneverbeknownnow。\"Afteramomentheadded:\"Butwhyshouldyouwishtoknow?Ifhewentthereasapeacemaker，hediedinagoodcause，insuchawayashewouldwishtodie，Ibelieve。\" \"Yes，\"saidthegirl；\"Ihavethoughtofthat。Butdeathisawful；wemustnotthinkpatiently，forgivinglyofsendinganyonetotheirdeathinthebestcause。\"\"IfancylifewasanawfulthingtoConradDryfoos，\" Marchreplied。\"Hewasthwartedanddisappointed，withoutevenpleasingtheambitionthatthwartedanddisappointedhim。Thatpooroldman，hisfather，warpedhimfromhissimple，lifelongwishtobeaminister，andwastryingtomakeabusinessmanofhim。Ifitwillbeanyconsolationtoyoutoknowit，MissVance，Icanassureyouthathewasveryunhappy，andIdon\'tseehowhecouldeverhavebeenhappyhere。\" \"Itwon\'t，\"saidthegirl，steadily。\"Ifpeoplearebornintothisworld，it\'sbecausetheyweremeanttoliveinit。Itisn\'taquestionofbeinghappyhere；nooneishappy，inthatold，selfishway，orcanbe；buthecouldhavebeenofgreatuse。\" \"Perhapshewasofuseindying。Whoknows?HemayhavebeentryingtosilenceLindau。\" \"Oh，Lindauwasn\'tworthit!\"criedMrs。March。 MissVancelookedatherasifshedidnotquiteunderstand。ThensheturnedtoMarch。\"Hemighthavebeenunhappy，asweallare；butIknowthathislifeherewouldhavehadahigherhappinessthanwewishfororaimfor。\"Thetearsbegantorunsilentlydownhercheeks。 \"Helookedstrangelyhappythatdaywhenheleftme。Hehadhurthimselfsomehow，andhisfacewasbleedingfromascratch；hekepthishandkerchiefup；hewaspale，butsuchalightcameintohisfacewhenheshookhands——ah，IknowhewenttotryanddowhatIsaid!\"Theywereallsilent，whileshedriedhereyesandthenputherhandkerchiefbackintothepocketfromwhichshehadsuddenlypulledit，withaseriesofvivid，young-ladyishgestures，whichstruckMarchbytheirincongruitywiththeoccasionoftheirtalk，andyetbytheirharmonywiththerestofherelegance。\"Iamsorry，MissVance)\"bebegan，\"thatIcan\'treallytellyouanythingmore——\" \"Youareverykind，\"shesaid，controllingherselfandrisingquickly。 \"Ithankyou——thankyoubothverymuch。\"SheturnedtoMrs。Marchandshookhandswithherandthenwithhim。\"Imighthaveknown——Ididknowthattherewasn\'tanythingmoreforyoutotell。ButatleastI\'vefoundoutfromyouthattherewasnothing，andnowIcanbegintobearwhatI must。Howarethosepoorcreatures——hismotherandfather，hissisters? Someday，Ihope，Ishallbeashamedtohavepostponedthemtothethoughtofmyself；butIcan\'tpretendtobeyet。Icouldnotcometothefuneral；Iwantedto。\" SheaddressedherquestiontoMrs。March，whoanswered:\"Icanunderstand。Buttheywerepleasedwiththeflowersyousent；peopleare，atsuchtimes，andtheyhaven\'tmanyfriends。\" \"Wouldyougotoseethem?\"askedthegirl。\"WouldyoutellthemwhatI\'vetoldyou?\" Mrs。Marchlookedatherhusband。 \"Idon\'tseewhatgooditwoulddo。Theywouldn\'tunderstand。Butifitwouldrelieveyou——\" \"I\'llwaittillitisn\'taquestionofself-relief，\"saidthegirl。 \"Good-bye!\" Sheleftthemtolongdebateoftheevent。AttheendMrs。Marchsaid，\"Sheisastrangebeing；suchamixtureofthesocietygirlandthesaint。\" Herhusbandanswered:\"She\'sthepotentialityofseveralkindsoffanatic。She\'sveryunhappy，andIdon\'tseehowshe\'stobehappieraboutthatpoorfellow。Ishouldn\'tbesurprisedifshedidinspirehimtoattemptsomethingofthatkind。\" \"Well，yougotoutofitverywell，Basil。Iadmiredthewayyoumanaged。Iwasafraidyou\'dsaysomethingawkward。\" \"Oh，withaplainlineoftruthbeforeme，astheonlypossiblething，Icangetonprettywell。Whenitcomestoanythingdecorative，I\'dratherleaveittoyou，Isabel。\" Sheseemedinsensibleofhisjest。\"Ofcourse，hewasinlovewithher。 Thatwasthelightthatcameintohisfacewhenhewasgoingtodowhathethoughtshewantedhimtodo。\" \"Andshe——doyouthinkthatshewas——\" \"Whatanidea!Itwouldhavebeenperfectlygrotesque!\" VIII。 TheirafflictionbroughttheDryfoosesintohumanerrelationswiththeMarches，whohadhithertoregardedthemasanecessaryevil，astheodiousmeansoftheirownprosperity。Mrs。Marchfoundthatthewomenofthefamilyseemedgladofhercoming，andinthesenseofherusefulnesstothemallshebegantofeelakindnessevenforChristine。Butshecouldnothelpseeingthatbetweenthegirlandherfathertherewasanunsettledaccount，somehow，andthatitwasChristineandnottheoldmanwhowasholdingout。Shethoughtthattheirsorrowhadtendedtorefinetheothers。Melawasmuchmoresubdued，and，exceptwhensheabandonedherselftoachildishinterestinhermourning，shedidnothingtoshockMrs。March\'stasteortoseemunworthyofhergrief。Shewasverygoodtohermother，whomtheblowhadleftunchanged，andtoherfather，whomithadapparentlyfallenuponwithcrushingweight。Once，aftervisitingtheirhouse，Mrs。MarchdescribedtoMarchalittlescenebetweenDryfoosandMela，whenhecamehomefromWallStreet，andthegirlmethimatthedoorwithakindofcountrysimpleness，andtookhishatandstick，andbroughthimintotheroomwhereMrs。Marchsat，lookingtiredandbroken。 ShefoundthislookofDryfoos\'spathetic，anddweltonthesortofstupefactiontherewasinit；hemusthavelovedhissonmorethantheyeverrealized。\"Yes，\"saidMarch，\"Isuspecthedid。He\'sneverbeenabouttheplacesincethatday；hewasalwaysdroppinginbefore，onhiswayup-town。HeseemstogodowntoWallStreeteveryday，justasbefore，butIsupposethat\'smechanical；hewouldn\'tknowwhatelsetodo；Idaresayit\'sbestforhim。ThesanguineFulkersonisgettingalittleanxiousaboutthefutureof\'EveryOtherWeek。\'NowConrad\'sgone，heisn\'tsuretheoldmanwillwanttokeeponwithit，orwhetherhe\'llhavetolookupanotherAngel。Hewantstogetmarried，Iimagine，andhecan\'tventuretillthispointissettled。\" \"It\'saverymaterialpointtoustoo，Basil，\"saidMrs。March。 \"Well，ofcourse。Ihadn\'toverlookedthat，youmaybesure。OneofthethingsthatFulkersonandIhavediscussedisaschemeforbuyingthemagazine。Itssuccessisprettywellassurednow，andIshouldn\'tbeafraidtoputmoneyintoit——ifIhadthemoney。\" \"Icouldn\'tletyousellthehouseinBoston，Basil!\" \"AndIdon\'twantto。Iwishwecouldgobackandliveinitandgettherent，too!Itwouldbequiteasupport。ButIsupposeifDryfooswon\'tkeepon，itmustcometoanotherAngel。Ihopeitwon\'tbealiteraryone，withafancyforrunningmydepartment。\" \"Oh，Iguesswhoevertakesthemagazinewillbegladenoughtokeepyou!\" \"Doyouthinkso?Well，perhaps。ButIdon\'tbelieveFulkersonwouldletmestandlongbetweenhimandanAngeloftherightdescription。\" \"Well，then，Ibelievehewould。Andyou\'veneverseenanything，Basil，tomakeyoureallythinkthatMr。Fulkersondidn\'tappreciateyoutotheutmost。\" \"IthinkIcameprettynearanundervaluationinthatLindautrouble。 IshallalwayswonderwhatputabackboneintoFulkersonjustatthatcrisis。Fulkersondoesn\'tstrikemeasthestuffofamoralhero。\" \"Atanyrate，hewasone，\"saidMrs。March，\"andthat\'squiteenoughforme。\" Marchdidnotanswer。\"Whatanoblethinglifeis，anyway!HereIam，wellonthewaytofifty，aftertwenty-fiveyearsofhardwork，lookingforwardtothepotentialpoor-houseasconfidentlyasIdidinyouth。 Wemighthavesavedalittlemorethanwehavesaved；butthelittlemorewouldn\'tavailifIwereturnedoutofmyplacenow；andweshouldhavelivedsordidlytonopurpose。Someonealwayshasyoubythethroat，unlessyouhavesomeoneelseinyourgrip。Iwonderifthat\'stheattitudetheAlmightyintendedHisrespectablecreaturestotaketowardoneanother!IwonderifHemeantourcivilization，thebattlewefightin，thegamewetrickin!IwonderifHeconsidersitfinal，andifthekingdomofheavenonearth，whichweprayfor——\" \"HaveyouseenLindauto-day?\"Mrs。Marchasked。 \"Youinferreditfromthequalityofmypiety?\"Marchlaughed，andthensuddenlysobered。\"Yes，Isawhim。It\'sgoingratherhardwithhim，I\'mafraid。Theamputationdoesn\'thealverywell；theshockwasverygreat，andhe\'sold。It\'lltaketime。There\'ssomuchpainthattheyhavetokeephimunderopiates，andIdon\'tthinkhefullyknewme。Atanyrate，Ididn\'tgetmypietyfromhimto-day。\" \"It\'shorrible!Horrible!\"saidMrs。March。\"Ican\'tgetoverit! Afterlosinghishandinthewar，tolosehiswholearmnowinthisway! Itdoesseemtoocruel!Ofcourseheoughtn\'ttohavebeenthere；wecansaythat。Butyououghtn\'ttohavebeenthere，either，Basil。\" \"Well，Iwasn\'texactlyadvisingthepolicetogoandclubtherailroadpresidents。\" \"NeitherwaspoorConradDryfoos。\" \"Idon\'tdenyit。Allthatwasdistinctlythechanceoflifeanddeath。 ThatbelongedtoGod；andnodoubtitwaslaw，thoughitseemschance。 ButwhatIobjecttoisthiseconomicchance-worldinwhichwelive，andwhichwemenseemtohavecreated。Itoughttobelawasinflexibleinhumanaffairsastheorderofdayandnightinthephysicalworldthatifamanwillworkheshallbothrestandeat，andshallnotbeharassedwithanyquestionastohowhisreposeandhisprovisionshallcome。 Nothinglessidealthanthissatisfiesthereason。Butinourstateofthingsnooneissecureofthis。Nooneissureoffindingwork；nooneissureofnotlosingit。Imayhavemyworktakenawayfrommeatanymomentbythecaprice，themood，theindigestionofamanwhohasnotthequalificationforknowingwhetherIdoitwell，orill。Atmytimeoflife——ateverytimeoflife——amanoughttofeelthatifhewillkeepondoinghisdutyheshallnotsufferinhimselforinthosewhoaredeartohim，exceptthroughnaturalcauses。Butnomancanfeelthisasthingsarenow；andsowegoon，pushingandpulling，climbingandcrawling，thrustingasideandtramplingunderfoot；lying，cheating，stealing；andthenwegettotheend，coveredwithbloodanddirtandsinandshame，andlookbackoverthewaywe\'vecometoapalaceofourown，orthepoor-house，whichisabouttheonlypossessionwecanclaimincommonwithourbrother-men，Idon\'tthinktheretrospectcanbepleasing。\" \"Iknow，Iknow!\"saidhiswife。\"Ithinkofthosethings，too，Basil。 Lifeisn\'twhatitseemswhenyoulookforwardtoit。ButIthinkpeoplewouldsufferless，andwouldn\'thavetoworksohard，andcouldmakeallreasonableprovisionforthefuture，iftheywerenotsogreedyandsofoolish。\" \"Oh，withoutdoubt!Wecan\'tputitallontheconditions；wemustputsomeoftheblameoncharacter。Butconditionsmakecharacter；andpeoplearegreedyandfoolish，andwishtohaveandtoshine，becausehavingandshiningarehelduptothembycivilizationasthechiefgoodoflife。Weallknowtheyarenotthechiefgood，perhapsnotgoodatall；butifsomeoneventurestosayso，alltherestofuscallhimafraudandacrank，andgomoilingandtoilingontothepalaceorthepoor-house。Wecan\'thelpit。Ifonewerelessgreedyorlessfoolish，someoneelsewouldhaveandwouldshineathisexpense。Wedon\'tmoilandtoiltoourselvesalone；thepalaceorthepoor-houseisnotmerelyforourselves，butforourchildren，whomwe\'vebroughtupinthesuperstitionthathavingandshiningisthechiefgood。Wedarenotteachthemotherwise，forfeartheymayfalterinthefightwhenitcomestheirturn，andthechildrenofotherswillcrowdthemoutofthepalaceintothepoor-house。Ifwefeltsurethathonestworksharedbyallwouldbringthemhonestfoodsharedbyall，someheroicfewofus，whodidnotwishourchildrentoriseabovetheirfellows——thoughwecouldnotbeartohavethemfallbelow——mighttrustthemwiththetruth。Butwehavenosuchassurance，andsowegoontremblingbeforeDryfoosesandlivingingimcrackeries。\" \"Basil，Basil!Iwasalwayswillingtolivemoresimplythanyou。YouknowIwas!\" \"Iknowyoualwayssaidso，mydear。Buthowmanybell-ratchetsandspeaking-tubeswouldyoubewillingtohaveatthestreetdoorbelow? Irememberthatwhenwewerelookingforaflatyourejectedeverybuildingthathadabell-ratchetoraspeaking-tube，andwouldhavenothingtodowithanythathadmorethananelectricbutton；youwantedahall-boy，withelectricbuttonsalloverhim。Idon\'tblameyou。I findsuchthingsquiteasnecessaryasyoudo。\" \"Anddoyoumeantosay，Basil，\"sheasked，abandoningthisunprofitablebranchoftheinquiry，\"thatyouarereallyuneasyaboutyourplace? thatyouareafraidMr。DryfoosmaygiveupbeinganAngel，andMr。 Fulkersonmayplayyoufalse?\" \"Playmefalse?Oh，itwouldn\'tbeplayingmefalse。Itwouldbemerelylookingoutforhimself，ifthenewAngelhadeditorialtastesandwantedmyplace。It\'swhatanyonewoulddo。\" \"Youwouldn\'tdoit，Basil!\" \"Wouldn\'tI?Well，ifanyoneofferedmemoresalarythan\'EveryOtherWeek\'pays——say，twiceasmuch——whatdoyouthinkmydutytomysufferingfamilywouldbe?It\'sgiveandtakeinthebusinessworld，Isabel； especiallytake。Butastobeinguneasy，I\'mnot，intheleast。I\'vethespiritofalion，whenitcomestosuchachanceasthat。WhenIseehowreadilythesensibilitiesofthepassingstrangercanbeworkedinNewYork，IthinkoftakinguptheroleofthatdesperatemanonThirdAvenuewhowentalonglookingforgarbageintheguttertoeat。IthinkIcouldpickupatleasttwentyorthirtycentsadaybythatlittlegame，andmaintainmyfamilyintheaffluenceit\'sbeenaccustomedto。\" \"Basil!\"criedhiswife。\"Youdon\'tmeantosaythatmanwasanimpostor!AndI\'vegoneabout，eversince，feelingthatonesuchcaseinamillion，thebarepossibilityofit，wasenoughtojustifyallthatLindausaidabouttherichandthepoor!\" Marchlaughedteasingly。\"Oh，Idon\'tsayhewasanimpostor。Perhapshereallywashungry；but，ifhewasn\'t，whatdoyouthinkofacivilizationthatmakestheopportunityofsuchafraud?thatgivesusallsuchabadconsciencefortheneedwhichisthatweweakentotheneedthatisn\'t?Supposethatpoorfellowwasn\'tpersonallyfoundedonfact:nevertheless，herepresentedthetruth；hewastheidealofthesufferingwhichwouldbelesseffectiveifrealisticallytreated。Thatmanisagreatcomforttome。HeprobablyriotedfordaysonthatquarterIgavehim；madeadinnerverylikely，orachampagnesupper；andif\'EveryOtherWeek\'wantstogetridofme，Iintendtoworkthatracket。YoucanhangroundthecornerwithBella，andTomcancomeuptomeintears，atstatedintervals，andaskmeifI\'vefoundanythingyet。 Tobesure，wemightbearrestedandsentupsomewhere。Buteveninthatextremecaseweshouldbeprovidedfor。Ohno，I\'mnotafraidoflosingmyplace!I\'vemerelyasortofpsychologicalcuriositytoknowhowmenlikeDryfoosandFulkersonwillworkouttheproblembeforethem。\" IX。 ItwasacuriositywhichFulkersonhimselfshared，atleastconcerningDryfoos。\"Idon\'tknowwhattheoldman\'sgoingtodo，\"hesaidtoMarchthedayaftertheMarcheshadtalkedtheirfutureover。\"Saidanythingtoyouyet?\" \"No，notaword。\" \"You\'reanxious，Isuppose，sameasIam。Factis，\"saidFulkerson，blushingalittle，\"Ican\'tasktohaveadaynamedtillIknowwhereI aminconnectionwiththeoldman。Ican\'ttellwhetherI\'vegottolookoutforsomethingelseorsomebodyelse。Ofcourse，it\'sfullsoonyet。\" \"Yes，\"Marchsaid，\"muchsoonerthanitseemstous。We\'resoanxiousaboutthefuturethatwedon\'trememberhowveryrecentthepastis。\" \"That\'ssomethingso。Theoldman\'shardlyhadtimeyettopullhimselftogether。Well，I\'mgladyoufeelthatwayaboutit，March。Iguessit\'smoreofablowtohimthanwerealize。HewasagooddealboundupinCoonrod，thoughhedidn\'talwaysusehimverywell。Well，Ireckonit\'sapttohappensooftentimes；curioushowcruellovecanbe。Heigh? We\'reanawfulmixture，March!\" \"Yes，that\'sthemarvelandthecurse，asBrowningsays。\" \"Why，thatpoorboyhimself，\"pursuedFulkerson，hadstreaksofthemuleinhimthatcouldgiveoddstoBeaton，andhemusthavetriedtheoldmanbythewayhewouldgiveintohiswillandholdoutagainsthisjudgment。Idon\'tbelieveheeverbudgedahairs-breadthfromhisoriginalpositionaboutwantingtobeapreacherandnotwantingtobeabusinessman。Well，ofcourse!Idon\'tthinkbusinessisallinall； butitmusthavemadetheoldmanmadtofindthatwithoutsayinganything，ordoinganythingtoshowit，andafterseemingtocomeovertohisground，andreallycoming，practically，Coonrodwasjustexactlywherehefirstplantedhimself，everytime。\" \"Yes，peoplethathaveconvictionsaredifficult。Fortunately，they\'rerare。\" \"Doyouthinkso?Itseemstomethateverybody\'sgotconvictions。 Beatonhimself，whohasn\'taprincipletothrowatadog，hasgotconvictionsthesizeofabarn。Theyain\'talwaysthesameones，Iknow，butthey\'realwaystothesameeffect，asfarasBeaton\'sbeingNumberOneisconcerned。Theoldman\'sgotconvictionsordidhave，unlessthisthinglatelyhasshakenhimallup——andhebelievesthatmoneywilldoeverything。ColonelWoodburn\'sgotconvictionsthathewouldn\'tpartwithforuntoldmillions。Why，March，yougotconvictionsyourself!\" \"HaveI?\"saidMarch。\"Idon\'tknowwhattheyare。\" \"Well，neitherdoI；butIknowyouwerereadytokickthetroughoverforthemwhentheoldmanwantedustobounceLindauthattime。\" \"Ohyes，\"saidMarch；herememberedthefact；buthewasstilluncertainjustwhattheconvictionswerethathehadbeensostanchfor。 \"Isupposewecouldhavegotalongwithoutyou，\"Fulkersonmusedaloud。 \"It\'sastonishinghowyoualwayscangetalonginthisworldwithoutthemanthatissimplyindispensable。Makesafellowrealizethathecouldtakeadayoffnowandthenwithoutderangingthesolarsystemagreatdeal。Nowhere\'sCoonrod——or，rather，heisn\'t。ButthatboymanagedhispartoftheschoonersowellthatIusedtotremblewhenIthoughtofhisgettingthebetteroftheoldmanandgoingintoaconventorsomethingofthatkind；andnowhereheis，snuffedoutinhalfasecond，andIdon\'tbelievebutwhatweshallbesailingalongjustaschipperasusualinsideofthirtydays。IreckonitwillbringtheoldmantothepointwhenIcometotalkwithhimaboutwho\'stobeputinCoonrod\'splace。Idon\'tlikeverywelltostartthesubjectwithhim；butit\'sgottobedonesometime。\" \"Yes，\"Marchadmitted。\"It\'sterribletothinkhowunnecessaryeventhebestandwisestofusistothepurposesofProvidence。WhenIlookedatthatpooryoungfellow\'sfacesometimes——sogentleandtrueandpure—— Iusedtothinktheworldwasappreciablyricherforhisbeinginit。 Butareweappreciablypoorerforhisbeingoutofitnow?\" \"No，Idon\'treckonweare，\"saidFulkerson。\"AndwhatalotoftherawmaterialofallkindstheAlmightymusthave，towasteusthewayHeseemstodo。ThinkofthrowingawayapreciouscreaturelikeCoonrodDryfoosononechanceinathousandofgettingthatoldfoolofaLindauoutofthewayofbeingclubbed!ForIsupposethatwaswhatCoonrodwasupto。Say!HaveyoubeenroundtoseeLindauto-day?\" SomethinginthetoneorthemannerofFulkersonstartledMarch。\"No! Ihaven\'tseenhimsinceyesterday。\" \"Well，Idon\'tknow，\"saidFulkerson。\"IguessIsawhimalittlewhileafteryoudid，andthatyoungdoctorthereseemedtofeelkindofworriedabouthim。 Ornotworried，exactly；theycan\'taffordtoletsuchthingsworrythem，Isuppose；but——\" \"He\'sworse?\"askedMarch。 \"Oh，hedidn\'tsayso。ButIjustwonderedifyou\'dseenhimto-day。\" \"IthinkI\'llgonow，\"saidMarch，withapangatheart。HehadgoneeverydaytoseeLindau，butthisdayhehadthoughthewouldnotgo，andthatwaswhyhisheartsmotehim。HeknewthatifhewereinLindau\'splaceLindauwouldneverhavelefthissideifhecouldhavehelpedit。 Marchtriedtobelievethatthecasewasthesame，asitstoodnow；itseemedtohimthathewasalwaysgoingtoorfromthehospital；hesaidtohimselfthatitmustdoLindauharmtobevisitedsomuch。ButbeknewthatthiswasnottruewhenhewasmetatthedoorofthewardwhereLindaulaybytheyoungdoctor，whohadcometofeelapersonalinterestinMarch\'sinterestinLindau。 Hesmiledwithoutgayety，andsaid，\"He\'sjustgoing。\" \"What!Discharged?\" \"Ohno。Hehasbeenfailingveryfastsinceyousawhimyesterday，andnow——\"Theyhadbeenwalkingsoftlyandtalkingsoftlydowntheaislebetweenthelongrowsofbeds。\"Wouldyoucaretoseehim?\" Thedoctormadeaslightgesturetowardthewhitecanvasscreenwhichinsuchplacesformsthedeath-chamberofthepoorandfriendless。\"Comeroundthisway——hewon\'tknowyou!I\'vegotratherfondofthepooroldfellow。Hewouldn\'thaveaclergyman——sortofagnostic，isn\'the?A goodmanyoftheseGermansare——buttheyoungladywho\'sbeencomingtoseehim——\" Theybothstopped。Lindau\'sgrand，patriarchalhead，foreshortenedtotheirview，laywhiteuponthepillow，andhisbroad，whitebeardfloweduponthesheet，whichheavedwiththoselonglastbreaths。BesidehisbedMargaretVancewaskneeling；herveilwasthrownback，andherfacewaslifted；sheheldclaspedbetweenherhandsthehandofthedyingman； shemovedherlipsinaudibly。 X。 Inspiteoftheexperienceofthewholeracefromtimeimmemorial，whendeathcomestoanyoneweknowwehelplesslyregarditasanincidentoflife，whichwillpresentlygoonasbefore。Perhapsthisisaninstinctiveperceptionofthetruththatitdoesgoonsomewhere；butwehaveasenseofdeathasabsolutelytheendevenforearthonlyifitrelatestosomeoneremoteorindifferenttous。MarchtriedtoprojectLindautothenecessarydistancefromhimselfinordertorealizethefactinhiscase，buthecouldnot，thoughthemanwithwhomhisyouthhadbeenassociatedinapoeticfriendshiphadnotactuallyreenteredtheregionofhisaffectiontothesamedegree，orinanylikedegree。Thechangedconditionsforbadethat。Hehadasorenessofheartconcerninghim；buthecouldnotmakesurewhetherthissorenesswasgriefforhisdeath，orremorseforhisownuncandorwithhimaboutDryfoos，oraforebodingofthataccountingwithhisconsciencewhichheknewhiswifewouldnowexactofhimdowntothelastminutestparticularoftheirjointandseveralbehaviortowardLindaueversincetheyhadmethiminNewYork。 Hefeltsomethingknockagainsthisshoulder，andhelookeduptohavehishatstruckfromhisheadbyahorse\'snose。Hesawthehorseputhisfootonthehat，andhereflected，\"Nowitwillalwayslooklikeanaccordion，\"andheheardthehorse\'sdriveraddresshimsomesarcasmsbeforehecouldfullyawakentothesituation。HewasstandingbareheadedinthemiddleofFifthAvenueandblockingthetideofcarriagesflowingineitherdirection。AmongthefacesputoutofthecarriagewindowshesawthatofDryfooslookingfromacoupe。Theoldmanknewhim，andsaid，\"Jumpinhere，Mr。March\"；andMarch，whohadmechanicallypickeduphishat，andwasthinking，\"NowIshallhavetotellIsabelaboutthisatonce，andshewillnevertrustmeonthestreetagainwithouther，\"mechanicallyobeyed。HerconfidenceinhimhadbeenunderminedbyhisbeingsonearConradwhenhewasshot；anditwentthroughhismindthathewouldgetDryfoostodrivehimtoahatter\'s，wherehecouldbuyanewhat，andnotbeobligedtoconfesshisnarrowescapetohiswifetilltheincidentwassomedaysoldandshecouldbearitbetter。ItquitedroveLindau\'sdeathoutofhismindforthemoment； andwhenDryfoossaidifhewasgoinghomehewoulddriveuptothefirstcross-streetandturnbackwithhim，Marchsaidhewouldbegladifhewouldtakehimtoahat-store。TheoldmanputhisheadoutagainandtoldthedrivertotakethemtotheFifthAvenueHotel。\"There\'sahat- storearoundtheresomewhere，seemstome，\"hesaid；andtheytalkedofMarch\'saccidentaswellastheycouldintherattleandclatterofthestreettilltheyreachedtheplace。Marchgothishat，passingajokewiththehatterabouttheimpossibilityofpressinghisoldhatoveragain，andcameouttothankDryfoosandtakeleaveofhim。 \"Ifyouain\'tinanygreathurry，\"theoldmansaid，\"Iwishyou\'dgetinhereaminute。I\'dliketohavealittletalkwithyou。\" \"Oh，certainly，\"saidMarch，andhethought:\"It\'scomingnowaboutwhatheintendstodowith\'EveryOtherWeek。\'Well，Imightaswellhaveallthemiseryatonceandhaveitover。\" Dryfooscalleduptohisdriver，whobenthisheaddownsidewisetolisten:\"GooverthereonMadisonAvenue，ontothatasphalt，andkeepdrivin\'upanddowntillIstopyou。Ican\'thearmyselfthinkonthesepavements，\"hesaidtoMarch。Butaftertheygotupontheasphalt，andbegansmoothlyrollingoverit，heseemedinnohastetobegin。Atlasthesaid，\"Iwantedtotalkwithyouaboutthat——thatDutchmanthatwasatmydinner——Lindau，\"andMarch\'sheartgaveajumpwithwonderwhetherhecouldalreadyhaveheardofLindau\'sdeath；butinaninstantheperceivedthatthiswasimpossible。\"Ibeentalkin\'withFulkersonabouthim，andhesaystheyhadtotakethebalanceofhisarmoff。\" Marchnodded；itseemedtohimhecouldnotspeak。Hecouldnotmakeoutfromtheclosefaceoftheoldmananythingofhismotive。Itwasset，butsetasapieceofbrokenmechanismiswhenithaslostthepowertorelaxitself。Therewasnootherhistoryinitofwhatthemanhadpassedthroughinhisson\'sdeath。 \"Idon\'tknow，\"Dryfoosresumed，lookingasideattheclothwindow-strap，whichhekeptfingering，\"asyouquiteunderstoodwhatmademethemaddest。Ididn\'ttellhimIcouldtalkDutch，becauseIcan\'tkeepitupwitharegularGerman；butmyfatherwasPennsylvanyDutch，andI couldunderstandwhathewassayingtoyouaboutme。IknowIhadnobusinesstounderstoodit，afterIlethimthinkIcouldn\'tbutIdid，andIdidn\'tlikeverywelltohaveamancallin\'meatraitorandatyrantatmyowntable。Well，Ilookatitdifferentlynow，andIreckonIhadbetterhavetriedtoputupwithit；andIwould，ifIcouldhaveknown——\"Hestoppedwithaquiveringlip，andthenwenton:\"Then，again，Ididn\'tlikehistalkin\'thatpaternalismofhis。Ialwayshearditwastheworstkindofthingforthecountry；Iwasbroughtuptothinkthebestgovernmentwastheonethatgovernstheleast；andIdidn\'twanttohearthatkindoftalkfromamanthatwaslivin\'onmymoney。 Icouldn\'tbearitfromhim。OrIthoughtIcouldn\'tbefore——before——\" Hestoppedagain，andgulped。\"Ireckonnowthereain\'tanythingI couldn\'tbear。\"Marchwasmovedbythebluntwordsandthemutestareforwardwithwhichtheyended。\"Mr。Dryfoos，Ididn\'tknowthatyouunderstoodLindau\'sGerman，orIshouldn\'thaveallowedhimhewouldn\'thaveallowedhimself——togoon。Hewouldn\'thaveknowinglyabusedhispositionofguesttocensureyou，nomatterhowmuchhecondemnedyou。\" \"Idon\'tcareforitnow，\"saidDryfoos。\"It\'sallpastandgone，asfarasI\'mconcerned；butIwantedyoutoseethatIwasn\'ttryin\'topunishhimforhisopinions，asyousaid。\" \"No；Iseenow，\"Marchassented，thoughhethought，hispositionstilljustified。\"Iwish——\" \"Idon\'tknowasIunderstandmuchabouthisopinions，anyway；butI ain\'treadytosayIwantthemendependentonmetomanagemybusinessforme。Ialwaystriedtodothesquarethingbymyhands；andinthatparticularcaseoutthereItookonalltheoldhandsjustasfastastheylefttheirUnion。AsforthegameIcameonthem，itwasdogeatdog，anyway。\" MarchcouldhavelaughedtothinkhowfarthisoldmanwasfromevenconceivingofLindau\'spoint\'ofview，andhowhewassayingtheworstofhimselfthatLindaucouldhavesaidofhim。Noonecouldhavecharacterizedthekindofthinghehaddonemoreseverelythanhewhenhecalleditdogeatdog。 \"There\'sagreatdealtobesaidonbothsides，\"Marchbegan，hopingtoleadupthroughthisgeneralitytothefactofLindau\'sdeath；buttheoldmanwenton: \"Well，allIwantedhimtoknowisthatIwasn\'ttryingtopunishhimforwhathesaidaboutthingsingeneral。Younaturallygotthatidea，I reckon；butIalwayswentinforlettin\'peoplesaywhattheypleaseandthinkwhattheyplease；it\'stheonlywayinafreecountry。\" \"I\'mafraid，Mr。Dryfoos，thatitwouldmakelittledifferencetoLindaunow——\" \"Idon\'tsupposehebearsmaliceforit，\"saidDryfoos，\"butwhatIwanttodoistohavehimtoldso。HecouldunderstandjustwhyIdidn\'twanttobecalledhardnames，andyetIdidn\'tobjecttohisthinkin\'whateverhepleased。I\'dlikehimtoknow——\" \"Noonecanspeaktohim，noonecantellhim，\"Marchbeganagain，butagainDryfoospreventedhimfromgoingon。 \"Iunderstandit\'sadelicatething；andI\'mnotaskin\'youtodoit。 WhatIwouldreallyliketodo——ifyouthinkhecouldbepreparedforit，someway，andcouldstandit——wouldbetogotohimmyself，andtellhimjustwhatthetroublewas。I\'minhopes，ifIdonethat，hecouldseehowIfeltaboutit。\" ApictureofDryfoosgoingtothedeadLindauwithhisvainregretspresenteditselftoMarch，andhetriedoncemoretomaketheoldmanunderstand。\"Mr。Dryfoos，\"besaid，\"Lindauispastallthatforever，\" andhefelttheghastlycomedyofitwhenDryfooscontinued，withoutheedinghim\"IgotaparticularreasonwhyIwanthimtobelieveitwasn\'thisideasIobjectedto——themideasofhisaboutthegovernmentcarryin\'everythingonandgivin\'work。Idon\'tunderstand\'emexactly，butIfoundawritin\'——among——myson\'s-things\"(heseemedtoforcethewordsthroughhisteeth)，\"andIreckonhe——thought——thatway。Kindofadiary——wherehe——putdown-histhoughts。Mysonandme——wedifferedaboutagood- manythings。\"Hischinshook，andfromtimetotimehestopped。\"I wasn\'tverygoodtohim，Ireckon；IcrossedhimwhereIguessIgotnobusinesstocrosshim；butIthoughteverythingof——Coonrod。Hewasthebestboy，fromababy，thateverwas；justsopatientandmild，anddonewhateverhewastold。Ioughtto\'a\'lethimbeenapreacher!Oh，myson!myson!\"Thesobscouldnotbekeptbackanylonger；theyshooktheoldmanwithaviolencethatmadeMarchafraidforhim；buthecontrolledhimselfatlastwithaseriesofhoarsesoundslikebarks。\"Well，it\'sallpastandgone!ButasIunderstandyoufromwhatyousaw，whenCoonrodwas——killed，hewastryin\'tosavethatoldmanfromtrouble?\" Yes，yes!Itseemedsotome。\" \"That\'lldo，then!Iwantyoutohavehimcomebackandwriteforthebookwhenhegetswell。Iwantyoutofindoutandletmeknowifthere\'sanythingIcandoforhim。I\'llfeelasifIdoneit——formy—— son。I\'lltakehimintomyownhouse，anddoforhimthere，ifyousayso，whenhegetssohecanbemoved。I\'llwaitonhimmyself。It\'swhatCoonrod\'ddo，ifhewashere。Idon\'tfeelanyhardnesstohimbecauseitwashimthatgotCoonrodkilled，asyoumightsay，inonesenseoftheterm；butI\'vetriedtothinkitout，andIfeellikeIwasallthemorebeholdentohimbecausemysondiedtryin\'tosavehim。WhateverIdo，I\'llbedoin\'itforCoonrod，andthat\'senoughforme。\"Heseemedtohavefinished，andheturnedtoMarchasiftohearwhathehadtosay。 Marchhesitated。\"I\'mafraid，Mr。Dryfoos——Didn\'tFulkersontellyouthatLindauwasverysick?\" \"Yes，ofcourse。Buthe\'sallright，hesaid。\" Nowithadtocome，thoughthefacthadbeenlatterlyplayingfastandloosewithMarch\'sconsciousness。Somethingalmostmadehimsmile；thewillingnesshehadoncefelttogivethisoldmanpain；thenheconsoledhimselfbythinkingthatatleasthewasnotobligedtomeetDryfoos\'swishtomakeatonementwiththefactthatLindauhadrenouncedhim，andwouldonnotermsworkforsuchamanashe，orsufferanykindnessfromhim。InthislightLindauseemedtheharderofthetwo，andMarchhadthemomentaryforcetosay\"Mr。Dryfoos——itcan\'tbe。Lindau——Ihavejustcomefromhim——isdead。\" XI。 \"Howdidhetakeit?Howcouldhebearit?Oh，Basil!Iwonderyoucouldhavethehearttosayittohim。Itwascruel!\" \"Yes，cruelenough，mydear，\"Marchownedtohiswife，whentheytalkedthematteroveronhisreturnhome。Hecouldnotwaittillthechildrenwereoutoftheway，andafterwardneitherhenorhiswifewassorrythathehadspokenofitbeforethem。Thegirlcriedplentifullyforheroldfriendwhowasdead，andsaidshehatedMr。Dryfoos，andthenwassorryforhim，too；andtheboylistenedtoall，andspokewithaserioussensethatpleasedhisfather。\"Butastohowhetookit，\"Marchwentontoanswerhiswife\'squestionaboutDryfoos——\"howdoanyofustakeathingthathurts?Someofuscryout，andsomeofusdon\'t。Dryfoosdrewakindoflong，quiveringbreath，asachilddoeswhenitgrieves——there\'ssomethingcuriouslysimpleandprimitiveabouthim——anddidn\'tsayanything。Afterawhileheaskedmehowhecouldseethepeopleatthehospitalabouttheremains；IgavehimmycardtotheyoungdoctortherethathadchargeofLindau。Isupposehewasstillcarryingforwardhisplanofreparationinhismind——tothedeadforthedead。Buthowuseless!IfhecouldhavetakenthelivingLindauhomewithhim，andcaredforhimallhisdays，whatwouldithaveprofitedthegentlecreaturewhoselifehisworldlyambitionvexedandthwartedhere? HemightaswellofferasacrificeatConrad\'sgrave。Children，\"saidMarch，turningtothem，\"deathisanexilethatnoremorseandnolovecanreach。Rememberthat，andbegoodtoeveryonehereonearth，foryourlongingtoretrieveanyharshnessorunkindnesstothedeadwillbetheveryecstasyofanguishtoyou。Iwonder，\"hemused，\"ifoneofthereasonswhywe\'reshutuptoourignoranceofwhatistobehereafterisn\'tbecauseifweweresureofanotherworldwemightbestillmorebrutaltooneanotherhere，inthehopeofmakingreparationsomewhereelse。Perhaps，ifweevercometoobeythelawofloveonearth，themysteryofdeathwillbetakenaway。\" \"Well\"——theancestralPuritanismspokeinMrs。March——\"thesetwooldmenhavebeenterriblypunished。Theyhavebothbeenviolentandwilful，andtheyhavebothbeenpunished。Nooneneedevertellmethereisnotamoralgovernmentoftheuniverse!\" Marchalwaysdislikedtohearhertalkinthisway，whichdidbothherheadandheartinjustice。\"AndConrad，\"hesaid，\"whatwashepunishedfor?\" \"He?\"sheanswered，inanexaltation——\"hesufferedforthesinsofothers。\" \"Ah，well，ifyouputitinthatway，yes。Thatgoesoncontinually。 That\'sanothermystery。\" Hefelltobroodingonit，andpresentlyheheardhissonsaying，\"Isuppose，papa，thatMr。Lindaudiedinabadcause?\" Marchwasstartled。HehadalwaysbeensosorryforLindau，andadmiredhiscourageandgenerositysomuch，thathehadneverfairlyconsideredthisquestion。\"Why，yes，\"heanswered；\"hediedinthecauseofdisorder；hewastryingtoobstructthelaw。Nodoubttherewasawrongthere，aninconsistencyandaninjusticethathefeltkeenly；butitcouldnotbereachedinhiswaywithoutgreaterwrong。\" \"Yes；that\'swhatIthought，\"saidtheboy。\"Andwhat\'stheuseofoureverfightingaboutanythinginAmerica?Ialwaysthoughtwecouldvoteanythingwewanted。\" \"Wecan，ifwe\'rehonest，anddon\'tbuyandselloneanother\'svotes，\" saidhisfather。\"AndmenlikeLindau，whorenouncetheAmericanmeansashopeless，andlettheirloveofjusticehurrythemintosympathywithviolence——yes，theyarewrong；andpoorLindaudiddieinabadcause，asyousay，Tom。\"