第4章

类别:其他 作者:Charles Dickens字数:11152更新时间:18/12/13 16:21:26
stationtoreporthisproceedings。Hecouldhavetakenherdirectly;buthisobjectwas,ifpossible,totraceoutthemanwhowassupposedtohavecommittedtherobbery。Thenheheardofthediscoveryofthebrooch;andconsequentlydidnotcaretoreturn。 Norahslepttilleventhesummereveningbegantoclosein。Thenup。Someonewasatthedoor。ItwouldbeMr。Frank;andshedizzilypushedbackherruffledgreyhair,whichhadfallenoverhereyes,andstoodlookingtoseehim。Instead,therecameinMr。 Openshawandapoliceman。 \"ThisisNorahKennedy,\"saidMr。Openshaw。 \"O,sir,\"saidNorah,\"Ididnottouchthebrooch;indeedIdidnot。 O,sir,Icannotlivetobethoughtsobadlyof;\"andverysickandfaint,shesuddenlysankdownontheground。Tohersurprise,Mr。 Openshawraisedherupverytenderly。Eventhepolicemanhelpedtolayheronthesofa;and,atMr。Openshaw\'sdesire,hewentforsomewineandsandwiches;forthepoorgauntwomanlaytherealmostasifdeadwithwearinessandexhaustion。 \"Norah!\"saidMr。Openshaw,inhiskindestvoice,\"thebroochisfound。ItwashangingtoMrs。Chadwick\'sgown。Ibegyourpardon。 MosttrulyIbegyourpardon,forhavingtroubledyouaboutit。Mywifeisalmostbroken-hearted。Eat,Norah,——or,stay,firstdrinkthisglassofwine,\"saidhe,liftingherhead,pouringalittledownherthroat。 Asshedrank,sherememberedwhereshewas,andwhoshewaswaitingfor。ShesuddenlypushedMr。Openshawaway,saying,\"O,sir,youmustgo。Youmustnotstopaminute。Ifhecomesbackhewillkillyou。\" \"Alas,Norah!Idonotknowwho\'he\'is。Butsomeoneisgoneawaywhowillnevercomeback:someonewhoknewyou,andwhomIamafraidyoucaredfor。\" \"Idon\'tunderstandyou,sir,\"saidNorah,hermaster\'skindandsorrowfulmannerbewilderingheryetmorethanhiswords。ThepolicemanhadlefttheroomatMr。Openshaw\'sdesire,andtheytwowerealone。 \"YouknowwhatImean,whenIsaysomeoneisgonewhowillnevercomeback。Imeanthatheisdead!\" \"Who?\"saidNorah,tremblingallover。 \"ApoormanhasbeenfoundintheThamesthismorning,drowned。\" \"Didhedrownhimself?\"askedNorah,solemnly。 \"Godonlyknows,\"repliedMr。Openshaw,inthesametone。\"Yournameandaddressatourhouse,werefoundinhispocket:that,andhispurse,weretheonlythings,thatwerefounduponhim。Iamsorrytosayit,mypoorNorah;butyouarerequiredtogoandidentifyhim。\" \"Towhat?\"askedNorah。 \"Tosaywhoitis。Itisalwaysdone,inorderthatsomereasonmaybediscoveredforthesuicide——ifsuicideitwas。Imakenodoubthewasthemanwhocametoseeyouatourhouselastnight。Itisverysad,Iknow。\"Hemadepausesbetweeneachlittleclause,inordertotryandbringbackhersenses;whichhefearedwerewandering——sowildandsadwasherlook。 \"MasterOpenshaw,\"saidshe,atlast,\"I\'veadreadfulsecrettotellyou——onlyyoumustneverbreatheittoanyone,andyouandI musthideitawayforever。Ithoughttohavedoneitallbymyself,butIseeIcannot。Yonpoorman——yes!thedead,drownedcreatureis,Ifear,Mr。Frank,mymistress\'sfirsthusband!\" Mr。Openshawsatedown,asifshot。Hedidnotspeak;but,afterawhile,hesignedtoNorahtogoon。 \"Hecametometheothernight——when——Godbethanked——youwereallawayatRichmond。Heaskedmeifhiswifewasdeadoralive。Iwasabrute,andthoughtmoreofourallcominghomethanofhissoretrial:spokeoutsharp,andsaidshewasmarriedagain,andverycontentandhappy:Iallbutturnedhimaway:andnowheliesdeadandcold!\" \"Godforgiveme!\"saidMr。Openshaw。 \"Godforgiveusall!\"saidNorah。\"Yonpoormanneedsforgivenessperhapslessthananyoneamongus。Hehadbeenamongthesavages—— shipwrecked——Iknownotwhat——andhehadwrittenletterswhichhadneverreachedmypoormissus。\" \"Hesawhischild!\" \"Hesawher——yes!Itookhimup,togivehisthoughtsanotherstart;forIbelievedhewasgoingmadonmyhands。Icametoseekhimhere,asImorethanhalfpromised。MymindmisgavemewhenI heardhehadnevercomein。O,sirIitmustbehim!\" Mr。Openshawrangthebell。Norahwasalmosttoomuchstunnedtowonderatwhathedid。Heaskedforwritingmaterials,wrotealetter,andthensaidtoNorah: \"IamwritingtoAlice,tosayIshallbeunavoidablyabsentforafewdays;thatIhavefoundyou;thatyouarewell,andsendheryourlove,andwillcomehometo-morrow。YoumustgowithmetothePoliceCourt;youmustidentifythebody:Iwillpayhightokeepname;anddetailsoutofthepapers。 \"Butwhereareyougoing,sir?\" Hedidnotanswerherdirectly。Thenhesaid: \"Norah!Imustgowithyou,andlookonthefaceofthemanwhomI havesoinjured,——unwittingly,itistrue;butitseemstomeasifIhadkilledhim。Iwilllayhisheadinthegrave,asifheweremyonlybrother:andhowhemusthavehatedme!IcannotgohometomywifetillallthatIcandoforhimisdone。ThenIgowithadreadfulsecretonmymind。Ishallneverspeakofitagain,afterthesedaysareover。Iknowyouwillnot,either。\"Heshookhandswithher:andtheynevernamedthesubjectagain,theonetotheother。 NorahwenthometoAlicethenextday。Notawordwassaidonthecauseofherabruptdepartureadayortwobefore。Alicehadbeenchargedbyherhusbandinhisletternottoalludetothesupposedtheftofthebrooch;soshe,implicitlyobedienttothosewhomshelovedbothbynatureandhabit,wasentirelysilentonthesubject,onlytreatedNorahwiththemosttenderrespect,asiftomakeupforunjustsuspicion。 NordidAliceinquireintothereasonwhyMr。Openshawhadbeenabsentduringhisuncleandaunt\'svisit,afterhehadoncesaidthatitwasunavoidable。Hecameback,graveandquiet;and,fromthattimeforth,wascuriouslychanged。Morethoughtful,andperhapslessactive;quiteasdecidedinconduct,butwithnewanddifferentrulesfortheguidanceofthatconduct。TowardsAlicehecouldhardlybemorekindthanhehadalwaysbeen;buthenowseemedtolookuponherassomeonesacredandtobetreatedwithreverence,aswellastenderness。Hethroveinbusiness,andmadealargefortune,onehalfofwhichwassettleduponher。 Longyearsaftertheseevents,——afewmonthsafterhermotherdied,Ailsieandher\"father\"(asshealwayscalledMr。Openshaw)drovetoacemeteryalittlewayoutoftown,andshewascarriedtoacertainmoundbyhermaid,whowasthensentbacktothecarriage。 Therewasahead-stone,withF。W。andadate。Thatwasall。 Sittingbythegrave,Mr。Openshawtoldherthestory;andforthesadfateofthatpoorfatherwhomshehadneverseen,heshedtheonlytearssheeversawfallfromhiseyes。 *** \"Amostinterestingstory,allthrough,\"Isaid,asJarberfoldedupthefirstofhisseriesofdiscoveriesintriumph。\"Astorythatgoesstraighttotheheart——especiallyattheend。But\"——Istopped,andlookedatTrottle。 Trottleenteredhisprotestdirectlyintheshapeofacough。 \"Well!\"Isaid,beginningtolosemypatience。\"Don\'tyouseethatIwantyoutospeak,andthatIdon\'twantyoutocough?\" \"Quiteso,ma\'am,\"saidTrottle,inastateofrespectfulobstinacywhichwouldhaveupsetthetemperofasaint。\"Relative,Ipresume,tothisstory,ma\'am?\" \"Yes,Yes!\"saidJarber。\"Byallmeansletushearwhatthisgoodmanhastosay。\" \"Well,sir,\"answeredTrottle,\"IwanttoknowwhytheHouseoverthewaydoesn\'tlet,andIdon\'texactlyseehowyourstoryanswersthequestion。That\'sallIhavetosay,sir。\" Ishouldhavelikedtocontradictmyopinionatedservant,atthatmoment。But,excellentasthestorywasinitself,Ifeltthathehadhitontheweakpoint,sofarasJarber\'sparticularpurposeinreadingitwasconcerned。 \"Andthatiswhatyouhavetosay,isit?\"repeatedJarber。\"I enterthisroomannouncingthatIhaveaseriesofdiscoveries,andyoujumpinstantlytotheconclusionthatthefirstoftheseriesexhaustsmyresources。HaveIyourpermission,dearlady,toenlightenthisobtuseperson,ifpossible,byreadingNumberTwo?\" \"Myworkisbehindhand,ma\'am,\"saidTrottle,movingtothedoor,themomentIgaveJarberleavetogoon。 \"Stopwhereyouare,\"Isaid,inmymostperemptorymanner,\"andgiveMr。Jarberhisfairopportunityofansweringyourobjectionnowyouhavemadeit。 Trottlesatdownwiththelookofamartyr,andJarberbegantoreadwithhisbackturnedontheenemymoredecidedlythanever。 GOINGINTOSOCIETY Atoneperiodofitsreverses,theHousefellintotheoccupationofaShowman。Hewasfoundregisteredasitsoccupier,ontheparishbooksofthetimewhenherentedtheHouse,andtherewasthereforenoneedofanycluetohisname。But,hehimselfwaslesseasytobefound;for,hehadledawanderinglife,andsettledpeoplehadlostsightofhim,andpeoplewhoplumedthemselvesonbeingrespectablewereshyofadmittingthattheyhadeverknownanythingofhim。Atlast,amongthemarshlandsneartheriver\'slevel,thatlieaboutDeptfordandtheneighbouringmarket-gardens,aGrizzledPersonageinvelveteen,withafacesocutupbyvarietiesofweatherthathelookedasifhehadbeentattooed,wasfoundsmokingapipeatthedoorofawoodenhouseonwheels。Thewoodenhousewaslaidupinordinaryforthewinter,nearthemouthofamuddycreek;andeverythingnearit,thefoggyriver,themistymarshes,andthesteamingmarket-gardens,smokedincompanywiththegrizzledman。Inthemidstofthissmokingparty,thefunnel-chimneyofthewoodenhouseonwheelswasnotremiss,buttookitspipewiththerestinacompanionablemanner。 OnbeingaskedifitwerehewhohadoncerentedtheHousetoLet,GrizzledVelveteenlookedsurprised,andsaidyes。ThenhisnamewasMagsman?Thatwasit,TobyMagsman——whichlawfullychristenedRobert;butcalledintheline,fromainfant,Toby。TherewasnothingaginTobyMagsman,hebelieved?Iftherewassuspicionofsuch——mentionit! Therewasnosuspicionofsuch,hemightrestassured。But,someinquiriesweremakingaboutthatHouse,andwouldheobjecttosaywhyheleftit? Notatall;whyshouldhe?Heleftit,alongofaDwarf。 AlongofaDwarf? Mr。Magsmanrepeated,deliberatelyandemphatically,AlongofaDwarf。 MightitbecompatiblewithMr。Magsman\'sinclinationandconveniencetoenter,asafavour,intoafewparticulars? Mr。Magsmanenteredintothefollowingparticulars。 Itwasalongtimeago,tobeginwith;——aforelotteriesandadealmorewasdoneawaywith。Mr。Magsmanwaslookingaboutforagoodpitch,andheseethathouse,andhesaystohimself,\"I\'llhaveyou,ifyou\'retobehad。Ifmoney\'llgetyou,I\'llhaveyou。\" Theneighbourscutuprough,andmadecomplaints;butMr。Magsmandon\'tknowwhattheyWOULDhavehad。Itwasalovelything。Firstofall,therewasthecanvass,representinthepicteroftheGiant,inSpanishtrunksandaruff,whowashimselfhalftheheighthofthehouse,andwasrunupwithalineandpulleytoapoleontheroof,sothathisEdwascoevalwiththeparapet。Then,therewasthecanvass,representinthepicteroftheAlbinalady,showingherwhiteairtotheArmyandNavyincorrectuniform。Then,therewasthecanvass,representinthepicteroftheWildIndianascalpinamemberofsomeforeignnation。Then,therewasthecanvass,representinthepicterofachildofaBritishPlanter,seizedbytwoBoaConstrictors——notthatWEneverhadnochild,nornoConstrictorsneither。Similarly,therewasthecanvass,representinthepicteroftheWildAssofthePrairies——notthatWEneverhadnowildasses,norwouldn\'thavehad\'ematagift。Last,therewasthecanvass,representinthepicteroftheDwarf,andlikehimtoo(considerin),withGeorgetheFourthinsuchastateofastonishmentathimasHisMajestycouldn\'twithhisutmostpolitenessandstoutnessexpress。ThefrontoftheHousewassocoveredwithcanvasses,thattherewasn\'tasparkofdaylightevervisibleonthatside。\"MAGSMAN\'SAMUSEMENTS,\"fifteenfootlongbytwofoothigh,ranoverthefrontdoorandparlourwinders。ThepassagewasaArbourofgreenbaizeandgardenstuff。Abarrel-organperformedthereunceasing。Andastorespectability,——ifthreepenceain\'trespectable,whatis? But,theDwarfistheprincipalarticleatpresent,andhewasworththemoney。HewaswroteupasMAJORTPSCHOFFKI,OFTHEIMPERIAL BULGRADERIANBRIGADE。Nobodycouldn\'tpronouncethename,anditneverwasintendedanybodyshould。Thepublicalwaysturnedit,asaregularrule,intoChopski。InthelinehewascalledChops; partlyonthataccount,andpartlybecausehisrealname,ifheeverhadanyrealname(whichwasverydubious),wasStakes。 Hewasaun-commonsmallman,hereallywas。Certainlynotsosmallashewasmadeouttobe,butwhereISyourDwarfasis?Hewasamostuncommonsmallman,withamostuncommonlargeEd;andwhathehadinsidethatEd,nobodyeverknowedbuthimself:evensupposinhimselftohaveevertookstockofit,whichitwouldhavebeenastiffjobforevenhimtodo。 Thekindestlittlemanasnevergrowed!Spirited,butnotproud。 WhenhetravelledwiththeSpottedBaby——thoughheknowedhimselftobeanat\'ralDwarf,andknowedtheBaby\'sspotstobeputuponhimartificial,henursedthatBabylikeamother。Youneverheerdhimgiveaill-nametoaGiant。HeDIDallowhimselftobreakoutintostronglanguagerespectintheFatLadyfromNorfolk;butthatwasanaffairofthe\'art;andwhenaman\'s\'arthasbeentrifledwithbyalady,andthepreferencegivtoaIndian,heain\'tmasterofhisactions。 Hewasalwaysinlove,ofcourse;everyhumannat\'ralphenomenonis。 Andhewasalwaysinlovewithalargewoman;IneverknowedtheDwarfascouldbegottoloveasmallone。Whichhelpstokeep\'emtheCuriositiestheyare。 Onesing\'lerideahehadinthatEdofhis,whichmusthavemeantsomething,oritwouldn\'thavebeenthere。Itwasalwayshisopinionthathewasentitledtoproperty。Heneverwouldputhisnametoanything。Hehadbeentaughttowrite,bytheyoungmanwithoutarms,whogothislivingwithhistoes(quiteawritingmasterHEwas,andtaughtscoresintheline),butChopswouldhavestarvedtodeath,aforehe\'dhavegainedabitofbreadbyputtinghishandtoapaper。Thisisthemorecurioustobearinmind,becauseHEhadnoproperty,norhopeofproperty,excepthishouseandasarser。WhenIsayhishouse,Imeanthebox,paintedandgotupoutsidelikeareg\'larsix-roomer,thatheusedtocreepinto,withadiamondring(orquiteasgoodtolookat)onhisforefinger,andringalittlebelloutofwhatthePublicbelievedtobetheDrawing-roomwinder。AndwhenIsayasarser,ImeanaChaneysarserinwhichhemadeacollectionforhimselfattheendofeveryEntertainment。Hiscueforthat,hetookfromme:\"Ladiesandgentlemen,thelittlemanwillnowwalkthreetimesroundtheCairawan,andretirebehindthecurtain。\"Whenhesaidanythingimportant,inprivatelife,hemostlywounditupwiththisformofwords,andtheywasgenerallythelastthinghesaidtomeatnightaforehewenttobed。 HehadwhatIconsiderafinemind——apoeticmind。Hisideasrespectinhispropertynevercomeuponhimsostrongaswhenhesatuponabarrel-organandhadthehandleturned。Arterthewibrationhadrunthroughhimalittletime,hewouldscreechout,\"Toby,I feelmypropertycoming——grindaway!I\'mcountingmyguineasbythousands,Toby——grindaway!Toby,Ishallbeamanoffortun!I feeltheMintajinglinginme,Toby,andI\'mswellingoutintotheBankofEngland!\"Suchistheinfluenceofmusiconapoeticmind。 Notthathewaspartialtoanyothermusicbutabarrel-organ;onthecontrary,hatedit。 HehadakindofaeverlastinggrudgeaginthePublic:whichisathingyoumaynoticeinmanyphenomenonsthatgettheirlivingoutofit。Whatriledhimmostinthenaterofhisoccupationwas,thatitkephimoutofSociety。Hewascontiniwallysaying,\"Toby,myambitionis,togointoSociety。ThecurseofmypositiontowardsthePublicis,thatitkeepsmehoutofSociety。Thisdon\'tsignifytoalowbeastofaIndian;hean\'tformedforSociety。Thisdon\'tsignifytoaSpottedBaby;HEan\'tformedforSociety——Iam。\" NobodynevercouldmakeoutwhatChopsdonewithhismoney。Hehadagoodsalary,downonthedrumeverySaturdayasthedaycameround,besideshavingtherunofhisteeth——andhewasaWoodpeckertoeat——butallDwarfsare。Thesarserwasalittleincome,bringinghiminsomanyhalfpencethathe\'dcarry\'emforaweektogether,tiedupinapocket-handkercher。Andyetheneverhadmoney。Anditcouldn\'tbetheFatLadyfromNorfolk,aswasoncesupposed;becauseitstandstoreasonthatwhenyouhaveaanimositytowardsaIndian,whichmakesyougrindyourteethathimtohisface,andwhichcanhardlyholdyoufromGoosinghimaudiblewhenhe\'sgoingthroughhisWar-Dance——itstandstoreasonyouwouldn\'tunderthemcircumstancesdepriveyourself,tosupportthatIndianinthelapofluxury。 Mostunexpected,themysterycomeoutonedayatEghamRaces。ThePublicwasshyofbeinpulledin,andChopswasringinhislittlebelloutofhisdrawing-roomwinder,andwassnarlintomeoverhisshoulderashekneeleddownwithhislegsoutattheback-door——forhecouldn\'tbeshovedintohishousewithoutkneelingdown,andthepremiseswouldn\'taccommodatehislegs——wassnarlin,\"Here\'sapreciousPublicforyou;whytheDevildon\'ttheytumbleup?\"whenamaninthecrowdholdsupacarrier-pigeon,andcriesout,\"Ifthere\'sanypersonhereashasgotaticket,theLottery\'sjustdrawed,andthenumberashascomeupforthegreatprizeisthree,seven,forty-two!Three,seven,forty-two!\"IwasgivinthemantotheFuriesmyself,forcallingoffthePublic\'sattention——forthePublicwillturnaway,atanytime,tolookatanythinginpreferencetothethingshowed\'em;andifyoudoubtit,get\'emtogetherforanyindiwidualpurposeonthefaceoftheearth,andsendonlytwopeopleinlate,andseeifthewholecompanyan\'tfarmoreinterestedintakinparticularnoticeofthemtwothanofyou—— Isay,Iwasn\'tbestpleasedwiththemanforcallinout,andwasn\'tblessinhiminmyownmind,whenIseeChops\'slittlebellflyoutofwinderataoldlady,andhegetsupandkickshisboxover,exposinthewholesecret,andhecatchesholdofthecalvesofmylegsandhesaystome,\"Carrymeintothewan,Toby,andthrowapailofwaterovermeorI\'madeadman,forI\'vecomeintomyproperty!\" Twelvethousandoddhundredpound,wasChops\'swinnins。Hehadboughtahalf-ticketforthetwenty-fivethousandprize,andithadcomeup。Thefirstusehemadeofhisproperty,was,tooffertofighttheWildIndianforfivehundredpoundaside,himwithapoisoneddarnin-needleandtheIndianwithaclub;buttheIndianbeinginwantofbackerstothatamount,itwentnofurther。 Arterhehadbeenmadforaweek——inastateofmind,inshort,inwhich,ifIhadlethimsitontheorganforonlytwominutes,I believehewouldhavebust——butwekeptheorganfromhim——Mr。Chopscomeround,andbehavedliberalandbeautifultoall。Hethensentforayoungmanheknowed,ashadawerygenteelappearanceandwasaBonnetatagaming-booth(mostrespectablebroughtup,fatherhavinbeenimminentintheliverystablelinebutunfort\'nateinacommercialcrisis,throughpaintinaoldgray,ginger-bay,andsellinhimwithaPedigree),andMr。ChopssaidtothisBonnet,whosaidhisnamewasNormandy,whichitwasn\'t: \"Normandy,I\'magoinintoSociety。Willyougowithme?\" SaysNormandy:\"DoIunderstandyou,Mr。Chops,tohintimatethatthe\'oleoftheexpensesofthatmovewillbebornebyyourself?\" \"Correct,\"saysMr。Chops。\"AndyoushallhaveaPrincelyallowancetoo。\" TheBonnetliftedMr。Chopsuponachair,toshakehandswithhim,andrepliedinpoetry,withhiseyesseeminglyfulloftears: \"Myboatisontheshore,Andmybarkisonthesea,AndIdonotaskformore,ButI\'llGo:-alongwiththee。\" TheywentintoSociety,inachayandfourgrayswithsilkjackets。 TheytooklodgingsinPallMall,London,andtheyblazedaway。 InconsequenceofanotethatwasbroughttoBartlemyFairintheautumnofnextyearbyaservant,mostwonderfulgotupinmilk- whitecordsandtops,IcleanedmyselfandwenttoPallMall,oneeveningappinted。Thegentlemenwasattheirwinearterdinner,andMr。Chops\'seyeswasmorefixedinthatEdofhisthanIthoughtgoodforhim。Therewasthreeof\'em(incompany,Imean),andI knowedthethirdwell。Whenlastmet,hehadonawhiteRomanshirt,andabishop\'smitrecoveredwithleopard-skin,andplayedtheclarionetallwrong,inabandataWildBeastShow。 Thisgenttookonnottoknowme,andMr。Chopssaid:\"Gentlemen,thisisaoldfriendofformerdays:\"andNormandylookedatmethroughaeye-glass,andsaid,\"Magsman,gladtoseeyou!\"——whichI\'lltakemyoathhewasn\'t。Mr。Chops,togithimconvenienttothetable,hadhischaironathrone(muchoftheformofGeorgetheFourth\'sinthecanvass),buthehardlyappearedtometobeKingthereinanyotherpintofview,forhistwogentlemenorderedaboutlikeEmperors。TheywasalldressedlikeMay-Day——gorgeous!——AndastoWine,theyswaminallsorts。 Imadetheroundofthebottles,firstseparate(tosayIhaddoneit),andthenmixed\'emalltogether(tosayIhaddoneit),andthentriedtwoof\'emashalf-and-half,andthent\'othertwo。 Altogether,Ipassedapleasinevenin,butwithatendencytofeelmuddled,untilIconsidereditgoodmannerstogetupandsay,\"Mr。 Chops,thebestoffriendsmustpart,Ithankyouforthewarietyofforeigndrainsyouhavestoodso\'ansome,Ilookstowardsyouinredwine,andItakesmyleave。\"Mr。Chopsreplied,\"Ifyou\'lljusthitchmeoutofthisoveryourrightarm,Magsman,andcarrymedown-stairs,I\'llseeyouout。\"IsaidIcouldn\'tthinkofsuchathing,buthewouldhaveit,soIliftedhimoffhisthrone。HesmeltstrongofMaideary,andIcouldn\'thelpthinkingasIcarriedhimdownthatitwaslikecarryingalargebottlefullofwine,witharaytheruglystopper,agooddealoutofproportion。 WhenIsethimonthedoor-matinthehall,hekepmeclosetohimbyholdingontomycoat-collar,andhewhispers: \"Iain\'t\'appy,Magsman。\" \"What\'sonyourmind,Mr。Chops?\" \"Theydon\'tusemewell。Theyan\'tgratefultome。Theyputsmeonthemantel-piecewhenIwon\'thaveinmoreChampagne-wine,andtheylocksmeinthesideboardwhenIwon\'tgiveupmyproperty。\" \"Getridof\'em,Mr。Chops。\" \"Ican\'t。We\'reinSocietytogether,andwhatwouldSocietysay?\" \"ComeoutofSociety!\"saysI。 \"Ican\'t。Youdon\'tknowwhatyou\'retalkingabout。WhenyouhaveoncegoneintoSociety,youmustn\'tcomeoutofit。\" \"Thenifyou\'llexcusethefreedom,Mr。Chops,\"weremyremark,shakingmyheadgrave,\"Ithinkit\'sapityyoueverwentin。\" Mr。ChopsshookthatdeepEdofhis,toasurprisinextent,andslappedithalfadozentimeswithhishand,andwithmoreWicethanIthoughtwereinhim。Then,hesays,\"You\'reagoodfellow,butyoudon\'tunderstand。Good-night,goalong。Magsman,thelittlemanwillnowwalkthreetimesroundtheCairawan,andretirebehindthecurtain。\"ThelastIseeofhimonthatoccasionwashistryin,ontheextremestwergeofinsensibility,toclimbupthestairs,onebyone,withhishandsandknees。They\'dhavebeenmuchtoosteepforhim,ifhehadbeensober;buthewouldn\'tbehelped。 Itwarn\'tlongafterthat,thatIreadinthenewspaperofMr。 Chops\'sbeingpresentedatcourt。Itwasprinted,\"Itwillberecollected\"——andI\'venoticedinmylife,thatitissuretobeprintedthatitWILLberecollected,wheneveritwon\'t——\"thatMr。 Chopsistheindividualofsmallstature,whosebrilliantsuccessinthelastStateLotteryattractedsomuchattention。\"Well,Isaystomyself,SuchisLife!Hehasbeenanddoneitinearnestatlast。HehasastonishedGeorgetheFourth! (Onaccountofwhich,Ihadthatcanvassnew-painted,himwithabagofmoneyinhishand,apresentinittoGeorgetheFourth,andaladyinOstrichFeathersfallininlovewithhiminabag-wig,sword,andbucklescorrect。) ItooktheHouseasisthesubjectofpresentinquiries——thoughnotthehonourofbeinacquainted——andIrunMagsman\'sAmusementsinitthirteenmonths——sometimesonething,sometimesanother,sometimesnothinparticular,butalwaysallthecanvassesoutside。Onenight,whenwehadplayedthelastcompanyout,whichwasashycompany,throughitsrainingHeavenshard,Iwastakinapipeintheonepairbackalongwiththeyoungmanwiththetoes,whichIhadtakenonforamonth(thoughheneverdrawed——exceptonpaper),andIheardakickinatthestreetdoor。\"Halloa!\"Isaystotheyoungman,\"what\'sup!\"Herubshiseyebrowswithhistoes,andhesays,\"I can\'timagine,Mr。Magsman\"——whichhenevercouldimaginenothin,andwasmonotonouscompany。 Thenoisenotleavinoff,Ilaiddownmypipe,andItookupacandle,andIwentdownandopenedthedoor。Ilookedoutintothestreet;butnothincouldIsee,andnothinwasIawareof,untilI turnedroundquick,becausesomecreeturrunbetweenmylegsintothepassage。TherewasMr。Chops! \"Magsman,\"hesays,\"takeme,ontheoldterms,andyou\'vegotme; ifit\'sdone,saydone!\" Iwasallofamaze,butIsaid,\"Done,sir。\" \"Donetoyourdone,anddoubledone!\"sayshe。\"Haveyougotabitofsupperinthehouse?\" Bearininmindthemsparklinwarietiesofforeigndrainsaswe\'dguzzledawayatinPallMall,Iwasashamedtoofferhimcoldsassagesandgin-and-water;buthetook\'embothandtook\'emfree; havinachairforhistable,andsittindownatitonastool,likeholdtimes。I,allofamazeallthewhile。 Itwasarterhehadmadeacleansweepofthesassages(beef,andtothebestofmycalculationstwopoundandaquarter),thatthewisdomaswasinthatlittlemanbegantocomeoutofhimlikeprespiration。 \"Magsman,\"hesays,\"lookuponme!Youseeaforeyou,OneashasbothgoneintoSocietyandcomeout。\" \"O!YouAREoutofit,Mr。Chops?Howdidyougetout,sir?\" \"SOLDOUT!\"sayshe。YouneversawthelikeofthewisdomashisEdexpressed,whenhemadeuseofthemtwowords。 \"MyfriendMagsman,I\'llimparttoyouadiscoveryI\'vemade。It\'swallable;it\'scosttwelvethousandfivehundredpound;itmaydoyougoodinlife——Thesecretofthismatteris,thatitain\'tsomuchthatapersongoesintoSociety,asthatSocietygoesintoaperson。\" Notexactlykeepinupwithhismeanin,Ishookmyhead,putonadeeplook,andsaid,\"You\'rerightthere,Mr。Chops。\" \"Magsman,\"hesays,twitchinmebytheleg,\"Societyhasgoneintome,tothetuneofeverypennyofmyproperty。\"