第1章

类别:其他 作者:Laurence Sterne字数:11837更新时间:18/12/14 10:36:01
I\'lllookintothem:so,givinguptheargument,-Iwentstraighttomylodgings,putuphalfadozenshirtsandablackpairofsilkbreeches,-\"thecoatIhaveon,\"saidI,lookingatthesleeve,\"willdo;\"-tookaplaceintheDoverstage;andthepacketsailingatninethenextmorning,-bythreeIhadgotsatdowntomydinneruponafricaseedchicken,soincontestablyinFrance,thathadIdiedthatnightofanindigestion,thewholeworldcouldnothavesuspendedtheeffectsoftheDROITSD\'AUBAINE;-myshirts,andblackpairofsilkbreeches,-portmanteauandall,musthavegonetotheKingofFrance;-eventhelittlepicturewhichIhavesolongworn,andsooftenhavetoldthee,Eliza,I wouldcarrywithmeintomygrave,wouldhavebeentornfrommyneck!-Ungenerous!toseizeuponthewreckofanunwarypassenger,whomyoursubjectshadbeckonedtotheircoast!-Byheaven!Sire,itisnotwelldone;andmuchdoesitgrieveme,\'tisthemonarchofapeoplesocivilizedandcourteous,andsorenownedforsentimentandfinefeelings,thatIhavetoreasonwith! ButIhavescarcesetafootinyourdominions。 WHENIhadfishedmydinner,anddranktheKingofFrance\'shealth,tosatisfymymindthatIborehimnospleen,but,onthecontrary,highhonourforthehumanityofhistemper,-Iroseupaninchtallerfortheaccommodation- No-saidI-theBourbonisbynomeansacruelrace:theymaybemisled,likeotherpeople;butthereisamildnessintheirblood。AsIacknowledgedthis,Ifeltasuffusionofafinerkinduponmycheek-morewarmandfriendlytoman,thanwhatBurgundy(atleastoftwolivresabottle,whichwassuchasIhadbeendrinking)couldhaveproduced- JustGod!saidI,kickingmyportmanteauaside,whatisthereinthisworld\'sgoodswhichshouldsharpenourspirits,andmakesomanykind-heartedbrethrenofusfalloutsocruellyaswedobytheway? Whenmanisatpeacewithman,howmuchlighterthanafeatheristheheaviestofmetalsinhishand!hepullsouthispurse,andholdingitairilyanduncompressed,looksroundhim,asifhesoughtforanobjecttoshareitwith-Indoingthis,Ifelteveryvesselinmyframedilate,-thearteriesbeatallcheerilytogether,andeverypowerwhichsustainedlife,performeditwithsolittlefriction,that\'twouldhaveconfoundedthemostPHYSICAL PRECIEUSEinFrance;withallhermaterialism,shecouldscarcehavecalledmeamachine- I\'mconfident,saidItomyself,Ishouldhaveoversethercreed。 Theaccessionofthatideacarriednature,atthattime,ashighasshecouldgo;-Iwasatpeacewiththeworldbefore,andthisfinish\'dthetreatywithmyself—— Now,wasIKingofFrance,criedI-whatamomentforanorphantohavebegg\'dhisfather\'sportmanteauofme! THEMONK。CALAIS。 IHADscarceutteredthewords,whenapoormonkoftheorderofSt。Franciscameintotheroomtobegsomethingforahisconvent。 Nomancarestohavehisvirtuesthesportofcontingencies-oronemanmaybegenerous,asanotherispuissant;-SEDNONQUOAD HANC-orbeitasitmay,-forthereisnoregularreasoningupontheebbsandflowsofourhumours;theymaydependuponthesamecauses,foraughtIknow,whichinfluencethetidesthemselves: \'twouldoftbenodiscredittous,tosupposeitwasso:I\'msureatleastformyself,thatinmanyacaseIshouldbemorehighlysatisfied,tohaveitsaidbytheworld,\"Ihadhadanaffairwiththemoon,inwhichtherewasneithersinnorshame,\"thanhaveitpassaltogetherasmyownactanddeed,whereintherewassomuchofboth- But,bethisasitmay,-themomentIcastmyeyesuponhim,I waspredeterminednottogivehimasinglesous;and,accordingly,Iputmypurseintomypocket-buttonedit-setmyselfalittlemoreuponmycentre,andadvancedupgravelytohim;therewassomething,Ifear,forbiddinginmylook:Ihavehisfigurethismomentbeforemyeyes,andthinktherewasthatinitwhichdeservedbetter。 Themonk,asIjudgedbythebreakinhistonsure,afewscatteredwhitehairsuponhistemples,beingallthatremainedofit,mightbeaboutseventy;-butfromhiseyes,andthatsortoffirewhichwasinthem,whichseemedmoretemper\'dbycourtesythanyears,couldbenomorethansixty:-Truthmightliebetween-Hewascertainlysixty-five;andthegeneralairofhiscountenance,notwithstandingsomethingseem\'dtohavebeenplanting-wrinklesinitbeforetheirtime,agreedtotheaccount。 ItwasoneofthoseheadswhichGuidohasoftenpainted,-mild,pale-penetrating,freefromallcommonplaceideasoffatcontentedignorancelookingdownwardsupontheearth;-itlook\'dforwards;butlook\'dasifitlook\'datsomethingbeyondthisworld-Howoneofhisordercamebyit,heavenabove,wholetitfalluponamonk\'sshouldersbestknows:butitwouldhavesuitedaBramin,andhadImetitupontheplainsofIndostan,Ihadreverencedit。 Therestofhisoutlinemaybegiveninafewstrokes;onemightputitintothehandsofanyonetodesign,for\'twasneitherelegantnorotherwise,butascharacterandexpressionmadeitso: itwasathin,spareform,somethingabovethecommonsize,ifitlostnotthedistinctionbyabendforwardinthefigure,-butitwastheattitudeofIntreaty;and,asitnowstandspresentedtomyimagination,itgainedmorethanitlostbyit。 Whenhehadenteredtheroomthreepaces,hestoodstill;andlayinghislefthanduponhisbreast(aslenderwhitestaffwithwhichhejourney\'dbeinginhisright)-whenIhadgotcloseuptohim,heintroducedhimselfwiththelittlestoryofthewantsofhisconvent,andthepovertyofhisorder;-anddiditwithsosimpleagrace,-andsuchanairofdeprecationwasthereinthewholecastofhislookandfigure,-Iwasbewitch\'dnottohavebeenstruckwithit- Abetterreasonwas,Ihadpredeterminednottogivehimasinglesous。 THEMONK。CALAIS- \'Tisverytrue,saidI,replyingtoacastupwardswithhiseyes,withwhichhehadconcludedhisaddress;-\'tisverytrue,-andheavenbetheirresourcewhohavenootherbutthecharityoftheworld,thestockofwhich,Ifear,isnowaysufficientforthemanyGREATCLAIMSwhicharehourlymadeuponit。 AsIpronouncedthewordsGREATCLAIMS,hegaveaslightglancewithhiseyedownwardsuponthesleeveofhistunic:-Ifeltthefullforceoftheappeal-Iacknowledgeit,saidI:-acoarsehabit,andthatbutonceinthreeyearswithmeagrediet,-arenogreatmatters;andthetruepointofpityis,astheycanbeearn\'dintheworldwithsolittleindustry,thatyourordershouldwishtoprocurethembypressinguponafundwhichisthepropertyofthelame,theblind,theagedandtheinfirm;-thecaptivewholiesdowncountingoverandoveragainthedaysofhisafflictions,languishesalsoforhisshareofit;andhadyoubeenoftheORDER OFMERCY,insteadoftheorderofSt。Francis,poorasIam,continuedI,pointingatmyportmanteau,fullcheerfullyshouldithavebeenopen\'dtoyou,fortheransomoftheunfortunate-Themonkmademeabow-Butofallothers,resumedI,theunfortunateofourowncountry,surely,havethefirstrights;andIhaveleftthousandsindistressuponourownshore-Themonkgaveacordialwavewithhishead,-asmuchastosay,Nodoubtthereismiseryenoughineverycorneroftheworld,aswellaswithinourconvent-Butwedistinguish,saidI,layingmyhanduponthesleeveofhistunic,inreturnforhisappeal-wedistinguish,mygoodfather! betwixtthosewhowishonlytoeatthebreadoftheirownlabour- andthosewhoeatthebreadofotherpeople\'s,andhavenootherplaninlife,buttogetthroughitinslothandignorance,FORTHE LOVEOFGOD。 ThepoorFranciscanmadenoreply:ahecticofamomentpass\'dacrosshischeek,butcouldnottarry-Natureseemedtohavedonewithherresentmentsinhim;-heshowednone:-butlettinghisstafffallwithinhisarms,hepressedbothhishandswithresignationuponhisbreast,andretired。 THEMONK。CALAIS。 MYheartsmotemethemomentheshutthedoor-Psha!saidI,withanairofcarelessness,threeseveraltimes-butitwouldnotdo: everyungracioussyllableIhadutter\'dcrowdedbackintomyimagination:Ireflected,IhadnorightoverthepoorFranciscan,buttodenyhim;andthatthepunishmentofthatwasenoughtothedisappointed,withouttheadditionofunkindlanguage-I consider\'dhisgrayhairs-hiscourteousfigureseem\'dtore-enterandgentlyaskmewhatinjuryhehaddoneme?-andwhyIcouldusehimthus?-Iwouldhavegiventwentylivresforanadvocate-I havebehavedveryill,saidIwithinmyself;butIhaveonlyjustsetoutuponmytravels;andshalllearnbettermannersasIgetalong。 THEDESOBLIGEANT。CALAIS。 WHENamanisdiscontentedwithhimself,ithasoneadvantagehowever,thatitputshimintoanexcellentframeofmindformakingabargain。NowtherebeingnotravellingthroughFranceandItalywithoutachaise,-andnaturegenerallypromptingustothethingwearefittestfor,Iwalk\'doutintothecoach-yardtobuyorhiresomethingofthatkindtomypurpose:anoldDESOBLIGEANT inthefurthestcornerofthecourt,hitmyfancyatfirstsight,soIinstantlygotintoit,andfindingitintolerableharmonywithmyfeelings,IorderedthewaitertocallMonsieurDessein,themasterofthehotel:-butMonsieurDesseinbeinggonetovespers,andnotcaringtofacetheFranciscan,whomIsawontheoppositesideofthecourt,inconferencewithaladyjustarrivedattheinn,-Idrewthetaffetacurtainbetwixtus,andbeingdeterminedtowritemyjourney,ItookoutmypenandinkandwrotetheprefacetoitintheDESOBLIGEANT。 PREFACE。INTHEDESOBLIGEANT。 ITmusthavebeenobservedbymanyaperipateticphilosopher,Thatnaturehassetupbyherownunquestionableauthoritycertainboundariesandfencestocircumscribethediscontentofman;shehaseffectedherpurposeinthequietestandeasiestmannerbylayinghimunderalmostinsuperableobligationstoworkouthisease,andtosustainhissufferingsathome。Itisthereonlythatshehasprovidedhimwiththemostsuitableobjectstopartakeofhishappiness,andbearapartofthatburdenwhichinallcountriesandageshaseverbeentooheavyforonepairofshoulders。\'Tistrue,weareenduedwithanimperfectpowerofspreadingourhappinesssometimesbeyondHERlimits,but\'tissoordered,that,fromthewantoflanguages,connections,anddependencies,andfromthedifferenceineducation,customs,andhabits,welieundersomanyimpedimentsincommunicatingoursensationsoutofourownsphere,asoftenamounttoatotalimpossibility。 Itwillalwaysfollowfromhence,thatthebalanceofsentimentalcommerceisalwaysagainsttheexpatriatedadventurer:hemustbuywhathehaslittleoccasionfor,attheirownprice;-hisconversationwillseldombetakeninexchangefortheirswithoutalargediscount,-andthis,bytheby,eternallydrivinghimintothehandsofmoreequitablebrokers,forsuchconversationashecanfind,itrequiresnogreatspiritofdivinationtoguessathisparty- Thisbringsmetomypoint;andnaturallyleadsme(ifthesee-sawofthisDESOBLIGEANTwillbutletmegeton)intotheefficientaswellasfinalcausesoftravelling- Youridlepeoplethatleavetheirnativecountry,andgoabroadforsomereasonorreasonswhichmaybederivedfromoneofthesegeneralcauses:- Infirmityofbody,Imbecilityofmind,orInevitablenecessity。 Thefirsttwoincludeallthosewhotravelbylandorbywater,labouringwithpride,curiosity,vanity,orspleen,subdividedandcombinedADINFINITUM。 Thethirdclassincludesthewholearmyofperegrinemartyrs;moreespeciallythosetravellerswhosetoutupontheirtravelswiththebenefitoftheclergy,eitherasdelinquentstravellingunderthedirectionofgovernorsrecommendedbythemagistrate;-oryounggentlementransportedbythecrueltyofparentsandguardians,andtravellingunderthedirectionofgovernorsrecommendedbyOxford,Aberdeen,andGlasgow。 Thereisafourthclass,buttheirnumberissosmallthattheywouldnotdeserveadistinction,wereitnotnecessaryinaworkofthisnaturetoobservethegreatestprecisionandnicety,toavoidaconfusionofcharacter。AndthesemenIspeakof,aresuchascrosstheseasandsojourninalandofstrangers,withaviewofsavingmoneyforvariousreasonsanduponvariouspretences:butastheymightalsosavethemselvesandothersagreatdealofunnecessarytroublebysavingtheirmoneyathome,-andastheirreasonsfortravellingaretheleastcomplexofanyotherspeciesofemigrants,IshalldistinguishthesegentlemenbythenameofSimpleTravellers。 ThusthewholecircleoftravellersmaybereducedtothefollowingHEADS:- IdleTravellers,InquisitiveTravellers,LyingTravellers,ProudTravellers,VainTravellers,SpleneticTravellers。 Thenfollow: TheTravellersofNecessity,TheDelinquentandFeloniousTraveller,TheUnfortunateandInnocentTraveller,TheSimpleTraveller,Andlastofall(ifyouplease)TheSentimentalTraveller,(meaningtherebymyself)whohavetravell\'d,andofwhichIamnowsittingdowntogiveanaccount,-asmuchoutofNECESSITY,andtheBESOIN DEVOYAGER,asanyoneintheclass。 Iamwellaware,atthesametime,asbothmytravelsandobservationswillbealtogetherofadifferentcastfromanyofmyforerunners,thatImighthaveinsisteduponawholenitchentirelytomyself;-butIshouldbreakinupontheconfinesoftheVAIN Traveller,inwishingtodrawattentiontowardsme,tillIhavesomebettergroundsforitthanthemereNOVELTYOFMYVEHICLE。 Itissufficientformyreader,ifhehasbeenatravellerhimself,thatwithstudyandreflectionhereuponhemaybeabletodeterminehisownplaceandrankinthecatalogue;-itwillbeonesteptowardsknowinghimself;asitisgreatoddsbutheretainssometinctureandresemblance,ofwhatheimbibedorcarriedout,tothepresenthour。 ThemanwhofirsttransplantedthegrapeofBurgundytotheCapeofGoodHope(observehewasaDutchman)neverdreamtofdrinkingthesamewineattheCape,thatthesamegrapeproducedupontheFrenchmountains,-hewastoophlegmaticforthat-butundoubtedlyheexpectedtodrinksomesortofvinousliquor;butwhethergoodorbad,orindifferent,-heknewenoughofthisworldtoknow,thatitdidnotdependuponhischoice,butthatwhatisgenerallycalledCHOICE,wastodecidehissuccess:however,hehopedforthebest;andinthesehopes,byanintemperateconfidenceinthefortitudeofhishead,andthedepthofhisdiscretion,MYNHEER mightpossiblyoverseebothinhisnewvineyard;andbydiscoveringhisnakedness,becomealaughingstocktohispeople。 EvensoitfareswiththePoorTraveller,sailingandpostingthroughthepoliterkingdomsoftheglobe,inpursuitofknowledgeandimprovements。 Knowledgeandimprovementsaretobegotbysailingandpostingforthatpurpose;butwhetherusefulknowledgeandrealimprovementsisallalottery;-andevenwheretheadventurerissuccessful,theacquiredstockmustbeusedwithcautionandsobriety,toturntoanyprofit:-but,asthechancesrunprodigiouslytheotherway,bothastotheacquisitionandapplication,Iamofopinion,Thatamanwouldactaswisely,ifhecouldprevailuponhimselftolivecontentedwithoutforeignknowledgeorforeignimprovements,especiallyifhelivesinacountrythathasnoabsolutewantofeither;-andindeed,muchgriefofhearthasitoftandmanyatimecostme,whenIhaveobservedhowmanyafoulsteptheInquisitiveTravellerhasmeasuredtoseesightsandlookintodiscoveries;allwhich,asSanchoPanzasaidtoDonQuixote,theymighthaveseendry-shodathome。Itisanagesofulloflight,thatthereisscarceacountryorcornerinEuropewhosebeamsarenotcrossedandinterchangedwithothers-Knowledgeinmostofitsbranches,andinmostaffairs,islikemusicinanItalianstreet,whereofthosemaypartakewhopaynothing-Butthereisnonationunderheaven-andGodismyrecord(beforewhosetribunalImustonedaycomeandgiveanaccountofthiswork)- thatIdonotspeakitvauntingly,-butthereisnonationunderheavenaboundingwithmorevarietyoflearning,-wherethesciencesmaybemorefitlywoo\'d,ormoresurelywon,thanhere,- whereartisencouraged,andwillsosoonrisehigh,-whereNature(takeheraltogether)hassolittletoanswerfor,-and,tocloseall,wherethereismorewitandvarietyofcharactertofeedthemindwith:-Wherethen,mydearcountrymen,areyougoing?- Weareonlylookingatthischaise,saidthey-Yourmostobedientservant,saidI,skippingoutofit,andpullingoffmyhat-Wewerewondering,saidoneofthem,who,IfoundwasanINQUISITIVE TRAVELLER,-whatcouldoccasionitsmotion-\'Twastheagitation,saidI,coolly,ofwritingapreface-Ineverheard,saidtheother,whowasaSIMPLETRAVELLER,ofaprefacewroteinaDESOBLIGEANT-Itwouldhavebeenbetter,saidI,inaVIS-A-VIS- ASANENGLISHMANDOESNOTTRAVELTOSEEENGLISHMEN,Iretiredtomyroom。 CALAIS。 IPERCEIVEDthatsomethingdarken\'dthepassagemorethanmyself,asIstepp\'dalongittomyroom;itwaseffectuallyMons。Dessein,themasterofthehotel,whohadjustreturnedfromvespers,andwithhishatunderhisarm,wasmostcomplaisantlyfollowingme,toputmeinmindofmywants。IhadwrotemyselfprettywelloutofconceitwiththeDESOBLIGEANT,andMons。Desseinspeakingofit,withashrug,asifitwouldnowaysuitme,itimmediatelystruckmyfancythatitbelong\'dtosomeINNOCENTTRAVELLER,who,onhisreturnhome,hadleftittoMons。Dessein\'shonourtomakethemostof。FourmonthshadelapsedsinceithadfinisheditscareerofEuropeinthecornerofMons。Dessein\'scoach-yard;andhavingsalliedoutfromthencebutavampt-upbusinessatthefirst,thoughithadbeentwicetakentopiecesonMountSennis,ithadnotprofitedmuchbyitsadventures,-butbynonesolittleasthestandingsomanymonthsunpitiedinthecornerofMons。Dessein\'scoach-yard。Muchindeedwasnottobesaidforit,-butsomethingmight;-andwhenafewwordswillrescuemiseryoutofherdistress,Ihatethemanwhocanbeachurlofthem- NowwasIthemasterofthishotel,saidI,layingthepointofmyfore-fingeronMons。Dessein\'sbreast,IwouldinevitablymakeapointofgettingridofthisunfortunateDESOBLIGEANT;-itstandsswingingreproachesatyoueverytimeyoupassbyit。 MONDIEU!saidMons。Dessein,-Ihavenointerest-Excepttheinterest,saidI,whichmenofacertainturnofmindtake,Mons。 Dessein,intheirownsensations,-I\'mpersuaded,toamanwhofeelsforothersaswellasforhimself,everyrainynight,disguiseitasyouwill,mustcastadampuponyourspirits:-Yousuffer,Mons。Dessein,asmuchasthemachine- Ihavealwaysobserved,whenthereisasmuchSOURasSWEETinacompliment,thatanEnglishmaniseternallyatalosswithinhimself,whethertotakeit,orletitalone:aFrenchmanneveris: Mons。Desseinmademeabow。 C\'ESTBIENVRAI,saidhe-ButinthiscaseIshouldonlyexchangeonedisquietudeforanother,andwithloss:figuretoyourself,mydearSir,thatingivingyouachaisewhichwouldfalltopiecesbeforeyouhadgothalf-waytoParis,-figuretoyourselfhowmuchIshouldsuffer,ingivinganillimpressionofmyselftoamanofhonour,andlyingatthemercy,asImustdo,D\'UNHOMMED\'ESPRIT。 Thedosewasmadeupexactlyaftermyownprescription;soIcouldnothelptastingit,-and,returningMons。Desseinhisbow,withoutmorecasuistrywewalk\'dtogethertowardshisRemise,totakeaviewofhismagazineofchaises。 INTHESTREET。CALAIS。 ITmustneedsbeahostilekindofaworld,whenthebuyer(ifitbebutofasorrypost-chaise)cannotgoforthwiththesellerthereofintothestreettoterminatethedifferencebetwixtthem,butheinstantlyfallsintothesameframeofmind,andviewshisconventionistwiththesamesortofeye,asifhewasgoingalongwithhimtoHyde-parkcornertofightaduel。Formyownpart,beingbutapoorswordsman,andnowayamatchforMonsieurDessein,Ifelttherotationofallthemovementswithinme,towhichthesituationisincident;-IlookedatMonsieurDesseinthroughandthrough-eyedhimashewalk\'dalonginprofile,- then,ENFACE;-thoughtlikeaJew,-thenaTurk,-dislikedhiswig,-cursedhimbymygods,-wishedhimatthedevil—— Andisallthistobelightedupintheheartforabeggarlyaccountofthreeorfourlouisd\'ors,whichisthemostIcanbeoverreachedin?-Basepassion!saidI,turningmyselfabout,asamannaturallydoesuponasuddenreverseofsentiment,-base,ungentlepassion!thyhandisagainsteveryman,andeveryman\'shandagainstthee-Heavenforbid!saidshe,raisingherhanduptoherforehead,forIhadturnedfullinfrontupontheladywhomIhadseeninconferencewiththemonk:-shehadfollowedusunperceived-Heavenforbid,indeed!saidI,offeringhermyown;- shehadablackpairofsilkgloves,openonlyatthethumbandtwofore-fingers,soaccepteditwithoutreserve,-andIledheruptothedooroftheRemise。 MonsieurDesseinhadDIABLEDthekeyabovefiftytimesbeforehehadfoundouthehadcomewithawrongoneinhishand:wewereasimpatientashimselftohaveitopened;andsoattentivetotheobstaclethatIcontinuedholdingherhandalmostwithoutknowingit:sothatMonsieurDesseinleftustogetherwithherhandinmine,andwithourfacesturnedtowardsthedooroftheRemise,andsaidhewouldbebackinfiveminutes。 Nowacolloquyoffiveminutes,insuchasituation,isworthoneofasmanyages,withyourfacesturnedtowardsthestreet:inthelattercase,\'tisdrawnfromtheobjectsandoccurrenceswithout;- whenyoureyesarefixeduponadeadblank,-youdrawpurelyfromyourselves。AsilenceofasinglemomentuponMons。Dessein\'sleavingus,hadbeenfataltothesituation-shehadinfalliblyturnedabout;-soIbeguntheconversationinstantly—— Butwhatwerethetemptations(asIwritenottoapologizefortheweaknessesofmyheartinthistour,-buttogiveanaccountofthem)-shallbedescribedwiththesamesimplicitywithwhichI feltthem。 THEREMISEDOOR。CALAIS。 WHENItoldthereaderthatIdidnotcaretogetoutoftheDESOBLIGEANT,becauseIsawthemonkincloseconferencewithaladyjustarrivedattheinn-Itoldhimthetruth,-butIdidnottellhimthewholetruth;forIwasasfullasmuchrestrainedbytheappearanceandfigureoftheladyhewastalkingto。 Suspicioncrossedmybrainandsaid,hewastellingherwhathadpassed:somethingjarreduponitwithinme,-Iwishedhimathisconvent。 Whentheheartfliesoutbeforetheunderstanding,itsavesthejudgmentaworldofpains-Iwascertainshewasofabetterorderofbeings;-however,Ithoughtnomoreofher,butwentonandwrotemypreface。 Theimpressionreturneduponmyencounterwithherinthestreet;aguardedfranknesswithwhichshegavemeherhand,showed,I thought,hergoodeducationandhergoodsense;andasIledheron,Ifeltapleasurableductilityabouther,whichspreadacalmnessoverallmyspirits—— GoodGod!howamanmightleadsuchacreatureasthisroundtheworldwithhim!- Ihadnotyetseenherface-\'twasnotmaterial:forthedrawingwasinstantlysetabout,andlongbeforewehadgottothedooroftheRemise,FANCYhadfinishedthewholehead,andpleasedherselfasmuchwithitsfittinghergoddess,asifshehaddivedintotheTiberforit;-butthouartaseduced,andaseducingslut;andalbeitthoucheatestusseventimesadaywiththypicturesandimages,yetwithsomanycharmsdostthoudoit,andthoudeckestoutthypicturesintheshapesofsomanyangelsoflight,\'tisashametobreakwiththee。 WhenwehadgottothedooroftheRemise,shewithdrewherhandfromacrossherforehead,andletmeseetheoriginal:-itwasafaceofaboutsix-and-twenty,-ofacleartransparentbrown,simplysetoffwithoutrougeorpowder;-itwasnotcriticallyhandsome,buttherewasthatinit,which,intheframeofmindI wasin,attachedmemuchmoretoit,-itwasinteresting:I fancieditworethecharactersofawidow\'dlook,andinthatstateofitsdeclension,whichhadpassedthetwofirstparoxysmsofsorrow,andwasquietlybeginningtoreconcileitselftoitsloss;- butathousandotherdistressesmighthavetracedthesamelines; Iwish\'dtoknowwhattheyhadbeen-andwasreadytoinquire,(hadthesameBONTONofconversationpermitted,asinthedaysofEsdras)-\"WHATAILELHTHEE?ANDWHYARTTHOUDISQUIETED?ANDWHY ISTHYUNDERSTANDINGTROUBLED?\"-Inaword,Ifeltbenevolenceforher;andresolv\'dsomewayorothertothrowinmymiteofcourtesy,-ifnotofservice。 Suchweremytemptations;-andinthisdispositiontogivewaytothem,wasIleftalonewiththeladywithherhandinmine,andwithourfacesbothturnedclosertothedooroftheRemisethanwhatwasabsolutelynecessary。 THEREMISEDOOR。CALAIS。 THIScertainly,fairlady,saidI,raisingherhanduplittlelightlyasIbegan,mustbeoneofFortune\'swhimsicaldoings;totaketwoutterstrangersbytheirhands,-ofdifferentsexes,andperhapsfromdifferentcornersoftheglobe,andinonemomentplacethemtogetherinsuchacordialsituationasFriendshipherselfcouldscarcehaveachievedforthem,hadsheprojecteditforamonth- Andyourreflectionuponitshowshowmuch,Monsieur,shehasembarrassedyoubytheadventure- Whenthesituationiswhatwewouldwish,nothingissoill-timedastohintatthecircumstanceswhichmakeitso:youthankFortune,continuedshe-youhadreason-theheartknewit,andwassatisfied;andwhobutanEnglishphilosopherwouldhavesentnoticeofittothebraintoreversethejudgment? Insayingthis,shedisengagedherhandwithalookwhichIthoughtasufficientcommentaryuponthetext。 ItisamiserablepicturewhichIamgoingtogiveoftheweaknessofmyheart,byowning,thatitsufferedapain,whichworthieroccasionscouldnothaveinflicted-Iwasmortifiedwiththelossofherhand,andthemannerinwhichIhadlostitcarriedneitheroilnorwinetothewound:Ineverfeltthepainofasheepishinferioritysomiserablyinmylife。 Thetriumphsofatruefeminineheartareshortuponthesediscomfitures。Inaveryfewsecondsshelaidherhanduponthecuffofmycoat,inordertofinishherreply;so,somewayorother,Godknowshow,Iregainedmysituation- Shehadnothingtoadd。 Iforthwithbegantomodeladifferentconversationforthelady,thinkingfromthespiritaswellasmoralofthis,thatIhadbeenmistakeninhercharacter;butuponturningherfacetowardsme,thespiritwhichhadanimatedthereplywasfled,-themusclesrelaxed,andIbeheldthesameunprotectedlookofdistresswhichfirstwonmetoherinterest:-melancholy!toseesuchsprightlinessthepreyofsorrow,-Ipitiedherfrommysoul;andthoughitmayseemridiculousenoughtoatorpidheart,-Icouldhavetakenherintomyarms,andcherishedher,thoughitwasintheopenstreet,withoutbrushing。 Thepulsationsofthearteriesalongmyfingerspressingacrosshers,toldherwhatwaspassingwithinme:shelookeddown-asilenceofsomemomentsfollowed。 Ifearinthisinterval,Imusthavemadesomeslighteffortstowardsaclosercompressionofherhand,fromasubtlesensationI feltinthepalmofmyown,-notasifshewasgoingtowithdrawhers-butasifshethoughtaboutit;-andIhadinfalliblylostitasecondtime,hadnotinstinctmorethanreasondirectedmetothelastresourceinthesedangers,-toholditloosely,andinamannerasifIwaseverymomentgoingtoreleaseit,ofmyself;sosheletitcontinue,tillMonsieurDesseinreturnedwiththekey; andinthemeantimeIsetmyselftoconsiderhowIshouldundotheillimpressionswhichthepoormonk\'sstory,incasehehadtoldither,musthaveplantedinherbreastagainstme。 THESNUFFBOX。CALAIS。 THEgoodoldmonkwaswithinsixpacesofus,astheideaofhimcrossedmymind;andwasadvancingtowardsusalittleoutoftheline,asifuncertainwhetherheshouldbreakinuponusorno-