第10章

类别:其他 作者:Anne Bronte字数:12292更新时间:18/12/14 13:39:02
suggestedshehadbetterdosoatonce,andthentherewouldbenofurthertroubleeitherwithrememberingorforgetting。Shecomplied,onconditionthatIwouldnotthinkofreading,orbotheringwiththebooksnow;forshewantedtoshowmethegardens,andtakeawalkintheparkwithme,beforeitbecametoohotforenjoyment;which,indeed,wasnearlythecasealready。 OfcourseIreadilyassented;andwetookourwalkaccordingly。 Aswewerestrollinginthepark,talkingofwhatmycompanionhadseenandheardduringhertravellingexperience,agentlemanonhorsebackrodeupandpassedus。Asheturned,inpassing,andstaredmefullintheface,Ihadagoodopportunityofseeingwhathewaslike。Hewastall,thin,andwasted,withaslightstoopintheshoulders,apaleface,butsomewhatblotchy,anddisagreeablyredabouttheeyelids,plainfeatures,andageneralappearanceoflanguorandflatness,relievedbyasinisterexpressioninthemouthandthedull,soullesseyes。 \'Idetestthatman!\'whisperedLadyAshby,withbitteremphasis,asheslowlytrottedby。 \'Whoisit?\'Iasked,unwillingtosupposethatsheshouldsospeakofherhusband。 \'SirThomasAshby,\'shereplied,withdrearycomposure。 \'AnddoyouDETESThim,MissMurray?\'saidI,forIwastoomuchshockedtorememberhernameatthemoment。 \'Yes,Ido,MissGrey,anddespisehimtoo;andifyouknewhimyouwouldnotblameme。\' \'Butyouknewwhathewasbeforeyoumarriedhim。\' \'No;Ionlythoughtso:Ididnothalfknowhimreally。 Iknowyouwarnedmeagainstit,andIwishIhadlistenedtoyou:butit\'stoolatetoregretthatnow。Andbesides,mammaoughttohaveknownbetterthaneitherofus,andsheneversaidanythingagainstit-quitethecontrary。AndthenIthoughtheadoredme,andwouldletmehavemyownway:hedidpretendtodosoatfirst,butnowhedoesnotcareabitaboutme。YetIshouldnotcareforthat:hemightdoashepleased,ifImightonlybefreetoamusemyselfandtostayinLondon,orhaveafewfriendsdownhere: butHEWILLdoashepleases,andImustbeaprisonerandaslave。 ThemomenthesawIcouldenjoymyselfwithouthim,andthatothersknewmyvaluebetterthanhimself,theselfishwretchbegantoaccusemeofcoquetryandextravagance;andtoabuseHarryMeltham,whoseshoeshewasnotworthytoclean。Andthenhemustneedshavemedowninthecountry,toleadthelifeofanun,lestI shoulddishonourhimorbringhimtoruin;asifhehadnotbeententimesworseeveryway,withhisbetting-book,andhisgaming- table,andhisopera-girls,andhisLadyThisandMrs。That-yes,andhisbottlesofwine,andglassesofbrandy-and-watertoo! Oh,IwouldgivetenthousandworldstobeMssMurrayagain!ItisTOO badtofeellife,health,andbeautywastingaway,unfeltandunenjoyed,forsuchabruteasthat!\'exclaimedshe,fairlyburstingintotearsinthebitternessofhervexation。 Ofcourse,Ipitiedherexceedingly;aswellforherfalseideaofhappinessanddisregardofduty,asforthewretchedpartnerwithwhomherfatewaslinked。IsaidwhatIcouldtocomforther,andofferedsuchcounselsasIthoughtshemostrequired:advisingher,first,bygentlereasoning,bykindness,example,andpersuasion,totrytoameliorateherhusband;andthen,whenshehaddoneallshecould,ifshestillfoundhimincorrigible,toendeavourtoabstractherselffromhim-towrapherselfupinherownintegrity,andtroubleherselfaslittleabouthimaspossible。 IexhortedhertoseekconsolationindoingherdutytoGodandman,toputhertrustinHeaven,andsolaceherselfwiththecareandnurtureofherlittledaughter;assuringhershewouldbeamplyrewardedbywitnessingitsprogressinstrengthandwisdom,andreceivingitsgenuineaffection。 \'ButIcan\'tdevotemyselfentirelytoachild,\'saidshe;\'itmaydie-whichisnotatallimprobable。\' \'But,withcare,manyadelicateinfanthasbecomeastrongmanorwoman。\' \'ButitmaygrowsointolerablylikeitsfatherthatIshallhateit。\' \'Thatisnotlikely;itisalittlegirl,andstronglyresemblesitsmother。\' \'Nomatter;Ishouldlikeitbetterifitwereaboy-onlythatitsfatherwillleaveitnoinheritancethathecanpossiblysquanderaway。WhatpleasurecanIhaveinseeingagirlgrowuptoeclipseme,andenjoythosepleasuresthatIamforeverdebarredfrom?ButsupposingIcouldbesogenerousastotakedelightinthis,stillitisONLYachild;andIcan\'tcentreallmyhopesinachild:thatisonlyonedegreebetterthandevotingoneselftoadog。Andasforallthewisdomandgoodnessyouhavebeentryingtoinstilintome-thatisallveryrightandproper,Idaresay,andifIweresometwentyyearsolder,Imightfructifybyit:butpeoplemustenjoythemselveswhentheyareyoung;andifotherswon\'tletthem-why,theymusthatethemforit!\' \'Thebestwaytoenjoyyourselfistodowhatisrightandhatenobody。TheendofReligionisnottoteachushowtodie,buthowtolive;andtheearlieryoubecomewiseandgood,themoreofhappinessyousecure。Andnow,LadyAshby,Ihaveonemorepieceofadvicetoofferyou,whichis,thatyouwillnotmakeanenemyofyourmother-in-law。Don\'tgetintothewayofholdingheratarms\'length,andregardingherwithjealousdistrust。Ineversawher,butIhaveheardgoodaswellasevilrespectingher;andI imaginethat,thoughcoldandhaughtyinhergeneraldemeanour,andevenexactinginherrequirements,shehasstrongaffectionsforthosewhocanreachthem;and,thoughsoblindlyattachedtoherson,sheisnotwithoutgoodprinciples,orincapableofhearingreason。Ifyouwouldbutconciliateheralittle,andadoptafriendly,openmanner-andevenconfideyourgrievancestoher- realgrievances,suchasyouhavearighttocomplainof-itismyfirmbeliefthatshewould,intime,becomeyourfaithfulfriend,andacomfortandsupporttoyou,insteadoftheincubusyoudescribeher。\'ButIfearmyadvicehadlittleeffectupontheunfortunateyounglady;and,findingIcouldrendermyselfsolittleserviceable,myresidenceatAshbyParkbecamedoublypainful。Butstill,Imuststayoutthatdayandthefollowingone,asIhadpromisedtodoso:though,resistingallentreatiesandinducementstoprolongmyvisitfurther,Iinsistedupondepartingthenextmorning;affirmingthatmymotherwouldbelonelywithoutme,andthatsheimpatientlyexpectedmyreturn。 Nevertheless,itwaswithaheavyheartthatIbadeadieutopoorLadyAshby,andleftherinherprincelyhome。Itwasnoslightadditionalproofofherunhappiness,thatsheshouldsoclingtotheconsolationofmypresence,andearnestlydesirethecompanyofonewhosegeneraltastesandideasweresolittlecongenialtoherown-whomshehadcompletelyforgotteninherhourofprosperity,andwhosepresencewouldberatheranuisancethanapleasure,ifshecouldbuthavehalfherheart\'sdesire。 chapter24 CHAPTERXXIV-THESANDS OURschoolwasnotsituatedintheheartofthetown:onenteringA-fromthenorth-westthereisarowofrespectable-lookinghouses,oneachsideofthebroad,whiteroad,withnarrowslipsofgarden-groundbeforethem,Venetianblindstothewindows,andaflightofstepsleadingtoeachtrim,brass-handleddoor。InoneofthelargestofthesehabitationsdweltmymotherandI,withsuchyoungladiesasourfriendsandthepublicchosetocommittoourcharge。Consequently,wewereaconsiderabledistancefromthesea,anddividedfromitbyalabyrinthofstreetsandhouses。 Buttheseawasmydelight;andIwouldoftengladlypiercethetowntoobtainthepleasureofawalkbesideit,whetherwiththepupils,oralonewithmymotherduringthevacations。Itwasdelightfultomeatalltimesandseasons,butespeciallyinthewildcommotionofaroughsea-breeze,andinthebrilliantfreshnessofasummermorning。 IawokeearlyonthethirdmorningaftermyreturnfromAshbyPark-thesunwasshiningthroughtheblind,andIthoughthowpleasantitwouldbetopassthroughthequiettownandtakeasolitaryrambleonthesandswhilehalftheworldwasinbed。Iwasnotlonginformingtheresolution,norslowtoactuponit。OfcourseIwouldnotdisturbmymother,soIstolenoiselesslydownstairs,andquietlyunfastenedthedoor。Iwasdressedandout,whenthechurchclockstruckaquartertosix。Therewasafeelingoffreshnessandvigourintheverystreets;andwhenIgotfreeofthetown,whenmyfootwasonthesandsandmyfacetowardsthebroad,brightbay,nolanguagecandescribetheeffectofthedeep,clearazureoftheskyandocean,thebrightmorningsunshineonthesemicircularbarrierofcraggycliffssurmountedbygreenswellinghills,andonthesmooth,widesands,andthelowrocksoutatsea-looking,withtheirclothingofweedsandmoss,likelittlegrass-grownislands-andaboveall,onthebrilliant,sparklingwaves。Andthen,theunspeakablepurity-andfreshnessoftheair!Therewasjustenoughheattoenhancethevalueofthebreeze,andjustenoughwindtokeepthewholeseainmotion,tomakethewavescomeboundingtotheshore,foamingandsparkling,asifwildwithglee。Nothingelsewasstirring-nolivingcreaturewasvisiblebesidesmyself。Myfootstepswerethefirsttopressthefirm,unbrokensands;-nothingbeforehadtrampledthemsincelastnight\'sflowingtidehadobliteratedthedeepestmarksofyesterday,andleftthemfairandeven,exceptwherethesubsidingwaterhadleftbehinditthetracesofdimpledpoolsandlittlerunningstreams。 Refreshed,delighted,invigorated,Iwalkedalong,forgettingallmycares,feelingasifIhadwingstomyfeet,andcouldgoatleastfortymileswithoutfatigue,andexperiencingasenseofexhilarationtowhichIhadbeenanentirestrangersincethedaysofearlyyouth。Abouthalf-pastsix,however,thegroomsbegantocomedowntoairtheirmasters\'horses-firstone,andthenanother,tillthereweresomedozenhorsesandfiveorsixriders: butthatneednottroubleme,fortheywouldnotcomeasfarasthelowrockswhichIwasnowapproaching。WhenIhadreachedthese,andwalkedoverthemoist,slipperysea-weed(attheriskofflounderingintooneofthenumerouspoolsofclear,saltwaterthatlaybetweenthem),toalittlemossypromontorywiththeseasplashingroundit,Ilookedbackagaintoseewhonextwasstirring。Still,therewereonlytheearlygroomswiththeirhorses,andonegentlemanwithalittledarkspeckofadogrunningbeforehim,andonewater-cartcomingoutofthetowntogetwaterforthebaths。Inanotherminuteortwo,thedistantbathingmachineswouldbegintomove,andthentheelderlygentlemenofregularhabitsandsoberquakerladieswouldbecomingtotaketheirsalutarymorningwalks。Buthoweverinterestingsuchascenemightbe,Icouldnotwaittowitnessit,forthesunandtheseasodazzledmyeyesinthatdirection,thatIcouldbutaffordoneglance;andthenIturnedagaintodelightmyselfwiththesightandthesoundofthesea,dashingagainstmypromontory-withnoprodigiousforce,fortheswellwasbrokenbythetangledsea-weedandtheunseenrocksbeneath;otherwiseIshouldsoonhavebeendelugedwithspray。Butthetidewascomingin;thewaterwasrising;thegulfsandlakeswerefilling;thestraitswerewidening:itwastimetoseeksomesaferfooting;soIwalked,skipped,andstumbledbacktothesmooth,widesands,andresolvedtoproceedtoacertainboldprojectioninthecliffs,andthenreturn。 Presently,Iheardasnufflingsoundbehindmeandthenadogcamefriskingandwrigglingtomyfeet。ItwasmyownSnap-thelittledark,wire-hairedterrier!WhenIspokehisname,heleaptupinmyfaceandyelledforjoy。Almostasmuchdelightedashimself,I caughtthelittlecreatureinmyarms,andkissedhimrepeatedly。 Buthowcamehetobethere?Hecouldnothavedroppedfromthesky,orcomeallthatwayalone:itmustbeeitherhismaster,therat-catcher,orsomebodyelsethathadbroughthim;so,repressingmyextravagantcaresses,andendeavouringtorepresshislikewise,Ilookedround,andbeheld-Mr。Weston! \'Yourdogremembersyouwell,MissGrey,\'saidhe,warmlygraspingthehandIofferedhimwithoutclearlyknowingwhatIwasabout。 \'Youriseearly。\' \'Notoftensoearlyasthis,\'Ireplied,withamazingcomposure,consideringallthecircumstancesofthecase。 \'Howfardoyoupurposetoextendyourwalk?\' \'Iwasthinkingofreturning-itmustbealmosttime,Ithink。\' Heconsultedhiswatch-agoldonenow-andtoldmeitwasonlyfiveminutespastseven。 \'But,doubtless,youhavehadalongenoughwalk,\'saidhe,turningtowardsthetown,towhichInowproceededleisurelytoretracemysteps;andhewalkedbesideme。 \'Inwhatpartofthetowndoyoulive?\'askedhe。\'Inevercoulddiscover。\' Nevercoulddiscover?Hadheendeavouredtodosothen? Itoldhimtheplaceofourabode。Heaskedhowweprosperedinouraffairs。Itoldhimweweredoingverywell-thatwehadhadaconsiderableadditiontoourpupilsaftertheChristmasvacation,andexpectedastillfurtherincreaseatthecloseofthis。 \'Youmustbeanaccomplishedinstructor,\'heobserved。 \'No,itismymother,\'Ireplied;\'shemanagesthingssowell,andissoactive,andclever,andkind。\' \'Ishouldliketoknowyourmother。Willyouintroducemetohersometime,ifIcall?\' \'Yes,willingly。\' \'Andwillyouallowmetheprivilegeofanoldfriend,oflookinginuponyounowandthen?\' \'Yes,if-Isupposeso。\' Thiswasaveryfoolishanswer,butthetruthwas,IconsideredthatIhadnorighttoinviteanyonetomymother\'shousewithoutherknowledge;andifIhadsaid,\'Yes,ifmymotherdoesnotobject,\'itwouldappearasifbyhisquestionIunderstoodmorethanwasexpected;so,SUPPOSINGshewouldnot,Iadded,\'Isupposeso:\'butofcourseIshouldhavesaidsomethingmoresensibleandmorepolite,ifIhadhadmywitsaboutme。Wecontinuedourwalkforaminuteinsilence;which,however,wasshortlyrelieved(nosmallrelieftome)byMr。Westoncommentinguponthebrightnessofthemorningandthebeautyofthebay,andthenupontheadvantagesA-possessedovermanyotherfashionableplacesofresort。 \'Youdon\'taskwhatbringsmetoA-\'saidhe。\'Youcan\'tsupposeI\'mrichenoughtocomeformyownpleasure。\' \'IheardyouhadleftHorton。\' \'Youdidn\'thear,then,thatIhadgotthelivingofF-?\' F-wasavillageabouttwomilesdistantfromA。 \'No,\'saidI;\'welivesocompletelyoutoftheworld,evenhere,thatnewsseldomreachesmethroughanyquarter;exceptthroughthemediumofthe-GAZETTE。ButIhopeyoulikeyournewparish; andthatImaycongratulateyouontheacquisition?\' \'Iexpecttolikemyparishbetterayearortwohence,whenIhaveworkedcertainreformsIhavesetmyheartupon-or,atleast,progressedsomestepstowardssuchanachievement。Butyoumaycongratulatemenow;forIfinditveryagreeabletoHAVEaparishalltomyself,withnobodytointerferewithme-tothwartmyplansorcripplemyexertions:andbesides,Ihavearespectablehouseinaratherpleasantneighbourhood,andthreehundredpoundsayear;and,infact,Ihavenothingbutsolitudetocomplainof,andnothingbutacompaniontowishfor。\' Helookedatmeasheconcluded:andtheflashofhisdarkeyesseemedtosetmyfaceonfire;greatlytomyowndiscomfiture,fortoevinceconfusionatsuchajuncturewasintolerable。Imadeaneffort,therefore,toremedytheevil,anddisclaimallpersonalapplicationoftheremarkbyahasty,ill-expressedreply,totheeffectthat,ifhewaitedtillhewaswellknownintheneighbourhood,hemighthavenumerousopportunitiesforsupplyinghiswantamongtheresidentsofF-anditsvicinity,orthevisitorsofA-,ifherequiredsoampleachoice:notconsideringthecomplimentimpliedbysuchanassertion,tillhisanswermademeawareofit。 \'Iamnotsopresumptuousastobelievethat,\'saidhe,\'thoughyoutellitme;butifitwereso,Iamratherparticularinmynotionsofacompanionforlife,andperhapsImightnotfindonetosuitmeamongtheladiesyoumention。\' \'Ifyourequireperfection,youneverwill。\' \'Idonot-Ihavenorighttorequireit,asbeingsofarfromperfectmyself。\' Heretheconversationwasinterruptedbyawater-cartlumberingpastus,forwewerenowcometothebusypartofthesands;and,forthenexteightortenminutes,betweencartsandhorses,andasses,andmen,therewaslittleroomforsocialintercourse,tillwehadturnedourbacksuponthesea,andbeguntoascendtheprecipitousroadleadingintothetown。Heremycompanionofferedmehisarm,whichIaccepted,thoughnotwiththeintentionofusingitasasupport。 \'Youdon\'toftencomeontothesands,Ithink,\'saidhe,\'forI havewalkedtheremanytimes,bothmorningandevening,sinceI came,andneverseenyoutillnow;andseveraltimes,inpassingthroughthetown,too,Ihavelookedaboutforyourschool-butI didnotthinkofthe-Road;andonceortwiceImadeinquiries,butwithoutobtainingtherequisiteinformation。\' Whenwehadsurmountedtheacclivity,Iwasabouttowithdrawmyarmfromhis,butbyaslighttighteningoftheelbowwastacitlyinformedthatsuchwasnothiswill,andaccordinglydesisted。 Discoursingondifferentsubjects,weenteredthetown,andpassedthroughseveralstreets。Isawthathewasgoingoutofhiswaytoaccompanyme,notwithstandingthelongwalkthatwasyetbeforehim;and,fearingthathemightbeinconveniencinghimselffrommotivesofpoliteness,Iobserved-\'IfearIamtakingyououtofyourway,Mr。Weston-IbelievetheroadtoF-liesquiteinanotherdirection。\' \'I\'llleaveyouattheendofthenextstreet,\'saidhe。 \'Andwhenwillyoucometoseemamma?\' \'To-morrow-Godwilling。\' Theendofthenextstreetwasnearlytheconclusionofmyjourney。 Hestoppedthere,however,bidmegood-morning,andcalledSnap,whoseemedalittledoubtfulwhethertofollowhisoldmistressorhisnewmaster,buttrottedawayuponbeingsummonedbythelatter。 \'Iwon\'toffertorestorehimtoyou,MissGrey,\'saidMr。Weston,smiling,\'becauseIlikehim。\' \'Oh,Idon\'twanthim,\'repliedI,\'nowthathehasagoodmaster; I\'mquitesatisfied。\' \'YoutakeitforgrantedthatIamagoodone,then?\' Themanandthedogdeparted,andIreturnedhome,fullofgratitudetoheavenforsomuchbliss,andprayingthatmyhopesmightnotagainbecrushed。 chapter25 CHAPTERXXV-CONCLUSION \'WELL,Agnes,youmustnottakesuchlongwalksagainbeforebreakfast,\'saidmymother,observingthatIdrankanextracupofcoffeeandatenothing-pleadingtheheatoftheweather,andthefatigueofmylongwalkasanexcuse。Icertainlydidfeelfeverishandtiredtoo。 \'Youalwaysdothingsbyextremes:now,ifyouhadtakenaSHORT walkeverymorning,andwouldcontinuetodoso,itwoulddoyougood。\' \'Well,mamma,Iwill。\' \'Butthisisworsethanlyinginbedorbendingoveryourbooks: youhavequiteputyourselfintoafever。\' \'Iwon\'tdoitagain,\'saidI。 IwasrackingmybrainswiththinkinghowtotellheraboutMr。 Weston,forshemustknowhewascomingto-morrow。However,I waitedtillthebreakfastthingswereremoved,andIwasmorecalmandcool;andthen,havingsatdowntomydrawing,Ibegan-\'Imetanoldfriendonthesandsto-day,mamma。\' \'Anoldfriend!Whocoulditbe?\' \'Twooldfriends,indeed。Onewasadog;\'andthenIremindedherofSnap,whosehistoryIhadrecountedbefore,andrelatedtheincidentofhissuddenappearanceandremarkablerecognition;\'andtheother,\'continuedI,\'wasMr。Weston,thecurateofHorton。\' \'Mr。Weston!Ineverheardofhimbefore。\' \'Yes,youhave:I\'vementionedhimseveraltimes,Ibelieve: butyoudon\'tremember。\' \'I\'veheardyouspeakofMr。Hatfield。\' \'Mr。Hatfieldwastherector,andMr。Westonthecurate:IusedtomentionhimsometimesincontradistinctiontoMr。Hatfield,asbeingamoreefficientclergyman。However,hewasonthesandsthismorningwiththedog-hehadboughtit,Isuppose,fromtherat-catcher;andheknewmeaswellasitdid-probablythroughitsmeans:andIhadalittleconversationwithhim,inthecourseofwhich,asheaskedaboutourschool,Iwasledtosaysomethingaboutyou,andyourgoodmanagement;andhesaidheshouldliketoknowyou,andaskedifIwouldintroducehimtoyou,ifheshouldtakethelibertyofcallingto-morrow;soIsaidIwould。WasI right?\' \'Ofcourse。Whatkindofamanishe?\' \'AveryRESPECTABLEman,Ithink:butyouwillseehimto-morrow。 HeisthenewvicarofF-,andashehasonlybeenthereafewweeks,Isupposehehasmadenofriendsyet,andwantsalittlesociety。\' Themorrowcame。WhatafeverofanxietyandexpectationIwasinfrombreakfasttillnoon-atwhichtimehemadehisappearance! Havingintroducedhimtomymother,Itookmyworktothewindow,andsatdowntoawaittheresultoftheinterview。Theygotonextremelywelltogether-greatlytomysatisfaction,forIhadfeltveryanxiousaboutwhatmymotherwouldthinkofhim。Hedidnotstaylongthattime:butwhenherosetotakeleave,shesaidsheshouldbehappytoseehim,wheneverhemightfinditconvenienttocallagain;andwhenhewasgone,Iwasgratifiedbyhearinghersay,-\'Well!Ithinkhe\'saverysensibleman。 Butwhydidyousitbackthere,Agnes,\'sheadded,\'andtalksolittle?\' \'Becauseyoutalkedsowell,mamma,Ithoughtyourequirednoassistancefromme:and,besides,hewasyourvisitor,notmine。\' Afterthat,heoftencalleduponus-severaltimesinthecourseofaweek。Hegenerallyaddressedmostofhisconversationtomymother:andnowonder,forshecouldconverse。Ialmostenviedtheunfettered,vigorousfluencyofherdiscourse,andthestrongsenseevincedbyeverythingshesaid-andyet,Ididnot;for,thoughIoccasionallyregrettedmyowndeficienciesforhissake,itgavemeverygreatpleasuretositandhearthetwobeingsI lovedandhonouredaboveeveryoneelseintheworld,discoursingtogethersoamicably,sowisely,andsowell。Iwasnotalwayssilent,however;norwasIatallneglected。IwasquiteasmuchnoticedasIwouldwishtobe:therewasnolackofkindwordsandkinderlooks,noendofdelicateattentions,toofineandsubtletobegraspedbywords,andthereforeindescribable-butdeeplyfeltatheart。 Ceremonywasquicklydroppedbetweenus:Mr。Westoncameasanexpectedguest,welcomeatalltimes,andneverderangingtheeconomyofourhouseholdaffairs。Heevencalledme\'Agnes:\'thenamehadbeentimidlyspokenatfirst,but,findingitgavenooffenceinanyquarter,heseemedgreatlytopreferthatappellationto\'MissGrey;\'andsodidI。Howtediousandgloomywerethosedaysinwhichhedidnotcome!Andyetnotmiserable; forIhadstilltheremembranceofthelastvisitandthehopeofthenexttocheerme。Butwhentwoorthreedayspassedwithoutmyseeinghim,Icertainlyfeltveryanxious-absurdly,unreasonablyso;for,ofcourse,hehadhisownbusinessandtheaffairsofhisparishtoattendto。AndIdreadedthecloseoftheholidays,whenMYbusinessalsowouldbegin,andIshouldbesometimesunabletoseehim,andsometimes-whenmymotherwasintheschoolroom- obligedtobewithhimalone:apositionIdidnotatalldesire,inthehouse;thoughtomeethimoutofdoors,andwalkbesidehim,hadprovedbynomeansdisagreeable。 Oneevening,however,inthelastweekofthevacation,hearrived-unexpectedly:foraheavyandprotractedthunder-showerduringtheafternoonhadalmostdestroyedmyhopesofseeinghimthatday; butnowthestormwasover,andthesunwasshiningbrightly。 \'Abeautifulevening,Mrs。Grey!\'saidhe,asheentered。\'Agnes,Iwantyoutotakeawalkwithmeto-\'(henamedacertainpartofthecoast-aboldhillonthelandside,andtowardstheseaasteepprecipice,fromthesummitofwhichagloriousviewistobehad)。\'Therainhaslaidthedust,andcooledandclearedtheair,andtheprospectwillbemagnificent。Willyoucome?\' \'CanIgo,mamma?\' \'Yes;tobesure。\' Iwenttogetready,andwasdownagaininafewminutes;though,ofcourse,ItookalittlemorepainswithmyattirethanifIhadmerelybeengoingoutonsomeshoppingexpeditionalone。Thethunder-showerhadcertainlyhadamostbeneficialeffectupontheweather,andtheeveningwasmostdelightful。Mr。Westonwouldhavemetotakehisarm;hesaidlittleduringourpassagethroughthecrowdedstreets,butwalkedveryfast,andappearedgraveandabstracted。Iwonderedwhatwasthematter,andfeltanindefinitedreadthatsomethingunpleasantwasonhismind;andvaguesurmises,concerningwhatitmightbe,troubledmenotalittle,andmademegraveandsilentenough。Butthesefantasiesvanisheduponreachingthequietoutskirtsofthetown;forassoonaswecamewithinsightofthevenerableoldchurch,andthe-hill,withthedeepbluebeyondit,Ifoundmycompanionwascheerfulenough。 \'I\'mafraidI\'vebeenwalkingtoofastforyou,Agnes,\'saidhe: \'inmyimpatiencetoberidofthetown,Iforgottoconsultyourconvenience;butnowwe\'llwalkasslowlyasyouplease。Isee,bythoselightcloudsinthewest,therewillbeabrilliantsunset,andweshallbeintimetowitnessitseffectuponthesea,atthemostmoderaterateofprogression。\' Whenwehadgotabouthalf-wayupthehill,wefellintosilenceagain;which,asusual,hewasthefirsttobreak。 \'Myhouseisdesolateyet,MissGrey,\'hesmilinglyobserved,\'andIamacquaintednowwithalltheladiesinmyparish,andseveralinthistowntoo;andmanyothersIknowbysightandbyreport; butnotoneofthemwillsuitmeforacompanion;infact,thereisonlyonepersonintheworldthatwill:andthatisyourself; andIwanttoknowyourdecision?\' \'Areyouinearnest,Mr。Weston?\' \'Inearnest!HowcouldyouthinkIshouldjestonsuchasubject?\' Helaidhishandonmine,thatrestedonhisarm:hemusthavefeltittremble-butitwasnogreatmatternow。 \'IhopeIhavenotbeentooprecipitate,\'hesaid,inaserioustone。\'Youmusthaveknownthatitwasnotmywaytoflatterandtalksoftnonsense,oreventospeaktheadmirationthatIfelt; andthatasinglewordorglanceofminemeantmorethanthehoniedphrasesandferventprotestationsofmostothermen。\' Isaidsomethingaboutnotlikingtoleavemymother,anddoingnothingwithoutherconsent。 \'IsettledeverythingwithMrs。Grey,whileyouwereputtingonyourbonnet,\'repliedhe。\'ShesaidImighthaveherconsent,ifI couldobtainyours;andIaskedher,incaseIshouldbesohappy,tocomeandlivewithus-forIwassureyouwouldlikeitbetter。 Butsherefused,sayingshecouldnowaffordtoemployanassistant,andwouldcontinuetheschooltillshecouldpurchaseanannuitysufficienttomaintainherincomfortablelodgings;and,meantime,shewouldspendhervacationsalternatelywithusandyoursister,andshouldbequitecontentedifyouwerehappy。 AndsonowIhaveoverruledyourobjectionsonheraccount。Haveyouanyother?\' \'No-none。\' \'Youlovemethen?\'saidbe,ferventlypressingmyhand。 \'Yes。\' HereIpause。MyDiary,fromwhichIhavecompiledthesepages,goesbutlittlefurther。Icouldgoonforyears,butIwillcontentmyselfwithadding,thatIshallneverforgetthatglorioussummerevening,andalwaysrememberwithdelightthatsteephill,andtheedgeoftheprecipicewherewestoodtogether,watchingthesplendidsunsetmirroredintherestlessworldofwatersatourfeet-withheartsfilledwithgratitudetoheaven,andhappiness,andlove-almosttoofullforspeech。 Afewweeksafterthat,whenmymotherhadsuppliedherselfwithanassistant,IbecamethewifeofEdwardWeston;andneverhavefoundcausetorepentit,andamcertainthatInevershall。Wehavehadtrials,andweknowthatwemusthavethemagain;butwebearthemwelltogether,andendeavourtofortifyourselvesandeachotheragainstthefinalseparation-thatgreatestofallafflictionstothesurvivor。But,ifwekeepinmindthegloriousheavenbeyond,wherebothmaymeetagain,andsinandsorrowareunknown,surelythattoomaybeborne;and,meantime,weendeavourtolivetothegloryofHimwhohasscatteredsomanyblessingsinourpath。 Edward,byhisstrenuousexertions,hasworkedsurprisingreformsinhisparish,andisesteemedandlovedbyitsinhabitants-ashedeserves;forwhateverhisfaultsmaybeasaman(andnooneisentirelywithout),Idefyanybodytoblamehimasapastor,ahusband,orafather。 Ourchildren,Edward,Agnes,andlittleMary,promisewell;theireducation,forthetimebeing,ischieflycommittedtome;andtheyshallwantnogoodthingthatamother\'scarecangive。Ourmodestincomeisamplysufficientforourrequirements:andbypractisingtheeconomywelearntinhardertimes,andneverattemptingtoimitateourricherneighbours,wemanagenotonlytoenjoycomfortandcontentmentourselves,buttohaveeveryyearsomethingtolaybyforourchildren,andsomethingtogivetothosewhoneedit。 AndnowIthinkIhavesaidsufficient。