第13章

类别:其他 作者:佚名字数:18087更新时间:18/12/14 13:47:05
ThenheranguishwentbacktoWalteragain;andtohisneedsasafugitive——shehadmeanttorepairhisunderwear,buthadpostponeddoingso,andherneglectnowappearedtobeadetailaslamentableasthecalamityitself。Shecouldneitherbestilleduponit,norherselfexhaustitsurgingstoself- reproach,thoughshefinallytookupanotherthemetemporarily。 Uponanunusuallyviolentoutbreakofherhusband\'s,indenunciationoftherunaway,shecriedoutfaintlythathewascruel;andfurtherweariedherbrokenvoicewithdetailsofWalter\'sbeautyasababy,andofhisbedtimepietiesthroughouthisinfancy。 Sothehotnightworeon。ThreehadstruckbeforeMrs。Adamswasgottobed;andAlice,returningtoherownroom,couldhearherfather\'sbarefeetthuddingbackandforthafterthat。\"Poorpapa!\"shewhisperedinhelplessimitationofhermother。\"Poorpapa!Poormama!PoorWalter!Poorallofus!\" Shefellasleep,afteratime,whilefromacrossthehallthebarefeetstillthuddedovertheirchangelessroute;andshewokeatseven,hearingAdamspassherdoor,shod。Inherwrappersheranoutintothehallwayandfoundhimdescendingthestairs。 \"Papa!\" \"Hush,\"hesaid,andlookedupatherwithreddenedeyes。\"Don\'twakeyourmother。\" \"Iwon\'t,\"shewhispered。\"Howaboutyou?Youhaven\'tsleptanyatall!\" \"Yes,Idid。Igotsomesleep。I\'mgoingovertotheworksnow。 Igottothrowsomefigurestogethertoshowthebank。Don\'tworry:I\'llgetthingsfixedup。Yougobacktobed。Good-bye。\" \"Wait!\"shebadehimsharply。 \"Whatfor?\" \"You\'vegottohavesomebreakfast。\" \"Don\'twant\'ny。\" \"Youwait!\"shesaid,imperiously,anddisappearedtoreturnalmostatonce。\"Icancookinmybedroomslippers,\"sheexplained,\"butIdon\'tbelieveIcouldinmybarefeet!\" Descendingsoftly,shemadehimwaitinthedining-roomuntilshebroughthimtoastandeggsandcoffee。\"Eat!\"shesaid。\"AndI\'mgoingtotelephoneforataxicabtotakeyou,ifyouthinkyou\'vereallygottogo。\" \"No,I\'mgoingtowalk——IWANTtowalk。\" Sheshookherheadanxiously。\"Youdon\'tlookable。You\'vewalkedallnight。\" \"No,Ididn\'t,\"hereturned。\"ItellyouIgotsomesleep。I gotallIwantedanyhow。\" \"But,papa——\" \"Here!\"heinterrupted,lookingupathersuddenlyandsettingdownhiscupofcoffee。\"Lookhere!WhataboutthisMr。 Russell?Iforgotallabouthim。Whatabouthim?\" Herliptrembledalittle,butshecontrolleditbeforeshespoke。\"Well,whatabouthim,papa?\"sheasked,calmlyenough。 \"Well,wecouldhardly——\"Adamspaused,frowningheavily。\"Wecouldhardlyexpecthewouldn\'thearsomethingaboutallthis。\" \"Yes;ofcoursehe\'llhearit,papa。\" \"Well?\" \"Well,what?\"sheasked,gently。 \"Youdon\'tthinkhe\'dbethe——thecheapkindit\'dmakeadifferencewith,ofcourse。\" \"Oh,no;heisn\'tcheap。Itwon\'tmakeanydifferencewithhim。\" Adamssufferedaprofoundsightoescapehim。\"Well——I\'mgladofthat,anyway。\" \"Thedifference,\"sheexplained——\"thedifferencewasmadewithouthishearinganythingaboutWalter。Hedoesn\'tknowaboutTHAT yet。\" \"Well,whatdoesheknowabout?\" \"Only,\"shesaid,\"aboutme。\" \"Whatyoumeanbythat,Alice?\"heasked,helplessly。 \"Nevermind,\"shesaid。\"It\'snothingbesidetherealtroublewe\'rein——I\'lltellyousometime。Youeatyoureggsandtoast; youcan\'tkeepgoingonjustcoffee。\" \"Ican\'teatanyeggsandtoast,\"heobjected,rising。\"I can\'t。\" \"ThenwaittillIcanbringyousomethingelse。\" \"No,\"hesaid,irritably。\"Iwon\'tdoit!Idon\'twantanydangfood!Andlookhere\"——hespokesharplytostopher,asshewenttowardthetelephone——\"Idon\'twantanydangtaxi,either!Youlookafteryourmotherwhenshewakesup。IgottobeatWORK!\" Andthoughshefollowedhimtothefrontdoor,entreating,hecouldnotbestayedorhindered。Hewentthroughthequietmorningstreetsatarickety,rapidgait,swinginghisoldstrawhatinhishands,andwhisperingangrilytohimselfashewent。 Hisgrizzledhair,nottrimmedforamonth,blewbackfromhisdampforeheadinthewarmbreeze;hisreddenedeyesstaredhardatnothingfromunderblinkinglids;andonesideofhisfacetwitchedstartlinglyfromtimetotime;——childrenmighthaverunfromhim,ormockedhim。 Whenhehadcomeintothatfallenquarterhisindustryhadpartlyrevivedandwhollymadeodorous,anegrowoman,leaninguponherwhitewashedgate,gazedafterhimandchuckledforthebenefitofagossipingfriendinthenexttinyyard。\"Oh,goodSatan! Wha\'ssamatterthatoleglueman?\" \"Who?Him?\"theneighbourinquired。\"Whathedonow?\" \"Talkin\'tohisolese\'f!\"thefirstexplained,joyously。\"Looklikegonedistracted——oleglueman!\" Adams\'slegshadgrownmoreuncertainwithhishardwalk,andhestumbledheavilyashecrossedthebakedmudofhisbroadlot,butcaredlittleforthat,wasalmostunawareofit,infact。 Thushiseyessawaslittleashisbodyfelt,andsohefailedtoobservesomethingthatwouldhavegivenhimadditionallightuponanoldphrasethatalreadymeantquiteenoughforhim。 Thereareinthewideworldpeoplewhohaveneverlearneditsmeaning;butmostareeitheryoungorbeautifullyunobservantwhoremainwhollyunawareoftheinnerpoignanciesthewordsconvey: \"arainofmisfortunes。\"Itisaboilingrain,seeminglywhimsicalinitschoiceofspotswhereontofall;and,sofarasmortaleyecantell,neitherthejustnortheunjustmayhopetoavoidit,orneedworrythemselvesbyexpectingit。IthadselectedtheAdamsfamilyforitsscaldings;noquestion。 Theglue-worksforeman,standinginthedoorwayofthebrickshed,observedhisemployer\'seccentricapproach,anddoubtfullystrokedawhiskeredchin。 \"Well,theyain\'tnoputticularusegettin\'soupsetoverit,\"hesaid,asAdamscameup。\"Whenathinghappens,why,ithappens,andthat\'sallthereistoit。Whenathing\'sso,why,it\'sso。 Allyoucandoaboutitisthinkifthere\'sanythingyouCANdo; andthat\'swhatyoubetterbedoin\'withthiscase。\" Adamshalted,andseemedtogapeathim。\"What——case?\"hesaid,withdifficulty。\"Wasitinthemorningpapers,too?\" \"No,itain\'tinnomorningpapers。Myland!Itdon\'tneedtobeinnopapers;lookattheSIZEofit!\" \"Thesizeofwhat?\" \"Why,greatGod!\"theforemanexclaimed。\"Heain\'tevenseenit。 Look!Lookyonder!\" Adamsstaredvaguelyattheman\'soutstretchedhandandpointingforefinger,thenturnedandsawagreatsignuponthefacadeofthebigfactorybuildingacrossthestreet。Theletterswerelargeenoughtobereadtwoblocksaway。 \"AFTERTHEFIFTEENTHOFNEXTMONTH THISBUILDINGWILLBEOCCUPIEDBY THEJ。A。LAMBLIQUIDGLUECO。INC。\" Agraytouring-carhadjustcometorestbeforetheprincipalentranceofthebuilding,andJ。A。Lambhimselfdescendedfromit。Heglancedovertowardthehumblerivalofhisprojectedgreatindustry,sawhisoldclerk,andimmediatelywalkedacrossthestreetandthelottospeaktohim。 \"Well,Adams,\"hesaid,inhishusky,cheerfulvoice,\"how\'syourglue-works?\" Adamsutteredaninarticulatesound,andliftedthehandthatheldhishatasiftomakeaprotectivegesture,butfailedtocarryitout;andhisarmsanklimpathisside。Theforeman,however,seemedtofeelthatsomethingoughttobesaid。 \"Ourglue-works,hell!\"heremarked。\"Iguesswewon\'tHAVEnoglue-worksoverherenotverylong,ifwegottocompetewiththesizedthingyougotoverthere!\" Lambchuckled。\"Ikindofhadsomesuchnotion,\"hesaid。\"Yousee,Virgil,Icouldn\'texactlyletyouwalkoffwithitlikeswalleringapato\'butter,now,couldI?Itdidn\'tlookexactlyreasonabletoexpectmetoletgolikethat,now,didit?\" Adamsfoundahalf-chokedvoicesomewhereinhisthroat。\"Doyou——wouldyoustepintomyofficeaminute,Mr。Lamb?\" \"Why,certainlyI\'mwillingtohavealittletalkwithyou,\"theoldgentlemansaid,ashefollowedhisformeremployeeindoors,andheadded,\"IfeelalotmorelikeitthanIdidbeforeIgotTHATup,overyonder,Virgil!\" Adamsthrewopenthedooroftheroughroomhecalledhisoffice,havingasjustificationforthistitlelittlemorethanthefactthathehadatelephonethereandadealtablethatservedasadesk。\"Juststepintotheoffice,please,\"hesaid。 Lambglancedatthedesk,atthekitchenchairbeforeit,atthetelephone,andatthepartitionwallsbuiltofoldboards,somecoveredwithancientpaintandsomemerelyweatherbeaten,thesalvageofahouse-wrecker;andhesmiledbroadly。\"Sotheseareyouroffices,arethey?\"heasked。\"Youexpecttodoquiteabusinesshere,Iguess,don\'tyou,Virgil?\" Adamsturneduponhimastrickenandtorturedface。\"HaveyouseenCharleyLohrsincelastnight,Mr。Lamb?\" \"No;Ihaven\'tseenCharley。\" \"Well,Itoldhimtotellyou,\"Adamsbegan;——\"ItoldhimI\'dpayyou——\" \"Paymewhatyouexpecttomakeouto\'glue,youmean,Virgil?\" \"No,\"Adamssaid,swallowing。\"Imeanwhatmyboyowesyou。 That\'swhatItoldCharleytotellyou。ItoldhimtotellyouI\'dpayyoueverylast——\" \"Well,well!\"theoldgentlemaninterrupted,testily。\"Idon\'tknowanythingaboutthat。\" \"I\'mexpectingtopayyou,\"Adamswenton,swallowingagain,painfully。\"IwasexpectingtodoitoutofaloanIthoughtI couldgetonmyglue-works。\" Theoldgentlemanliftedhisfrostedeyebrows。\"Oh,outo\'theGLUE-works?Youexpectedtoraisemoneyontheglue-works,didyou?\" Atthat,Adams\'sagitationincreasedprodigiously。\"How\'dyouTHINKIexpectedtopayyou?\"hesaid。\"DidyouthinkIexpectedtogetmoneyonmyownoldbones?\"Heslappedhimselfharshlyuponthechestandlegs。\"Doyouthinkabank\'lllendmoneyonaman\'sribsandhisbroken-downoldknee-bones?Theywon\'tdoit! YougottohavesomeBUSINESSprospectstoshow\'em,ifyouhaven\'tgotanypropertynorsecurities;andwhatbusinessprospectshaveIgotnow,withthatsignofyoursupoveryonder? Why,youdon\'tneedtomakeanOUNCEo\'glue;yoursign\'sfixedMEwithoutyourdoinganotherlick!THAT\'Sallyouhadtodo; justputyoursignup!Youneedn\'tto——\" \"Justletmetellyousomething,VirgilAdams,\"theoldmaninterrupted,harshly。\"Igotjustonerightimportantthingtotellyoubeforewetalkanyfurtherbusiness;andthat\'sthis: there\'ssomefewmeninthistownmadetheirmoneyinoff-colourways,buttherearen\'tmany;andthosetherearehavehadtobeadarnsightslickerthanyouknowhowtobe,oreverWILLknowhowtobe!Yes,sir,andtheynoneofthemhadthelittlegumptiontotrytomakeitoutofamanthathadthespiritnottolet\'em,andtheSTRENGTHnottolet\'em!Iknowwhatyouthought。 \'Here,\'yousaidtoyourself,\'here\'sthisolefoolJ。A。Lamb; he\'skindofwornoutandinhissecondchildhoodlike;Icanputitoveronhim,withouthisever——\'\" \"Ididnot!\"Adamsshouted。\"AgreatdealYOUknowaboutmyfeelingsandallwhatIsaidtomyself!There\'sonethingIwanttotellYOU,andthat\'swhatI\'msayingtomyselfNOW,andwhatmyfeelingsarethisMINUTE!\" Hestruckthetableagreatblowwithhisthinfist,andshookthedamagedknucklesmtheair。\"Ijustwanttotellyou,whateverIdidfeel,Idon\'tfeelMEANanymore;notto-day,I don\'t。There\'sameanermaninthisworldthan_I_am,Mr。 Lamb!\" \"Oh,soyoufeelbetteraboutyourselfto-day,doyou,Virgil?\" \"YoubetIdo!Youworkedtillyougotmewhereyouwantme;andIwouldn\'tdothattoanotherman,nomatterwhathedidtome! Iwouldn\'t——\" \"Whatyoutalkin\'about!How\'veI\'gotyouwhereIwantyou?\'\" \"Ain\'titplainenough?\"Adamscried。\"YouevengotmewhereI can\'traisethemoneytopaybackwhatmyboyowesyou!Doyousupposeanybody\'sfoolenoughtoletmehaveacentonthisbusinessafteronelookatwhatyougotoverthereacrosstheroad?\" \"No,Idon\'t。\" \"No,youdon\'t,\"Adamsechoed,hoarsely。\"What\'smore,youknewmyhousewasmortgaged,andmy——\" \"Ididnot,\"Lambinterrupted,angrily。\"Whatdo_I_careaboutyourhouse?\" \"What\'stheuseyourtalkinglikethat?\"Adamscried。\"YougotmewhereIcan\'tevenraisethemoneytopaywhatmyboyowesthecompany,so\'tIcan\'tshowanyreasontostoptheprosecutionandkeephimoutthepenitentiary。That\'swhereyouworkedtillyougotME!\" \"What!\"Lambshouted。\"Youaccusemeof——\" \"\'Accuseyou?\'WhatamItellingyou?DoyouthinkIgotnoEYES?\"AndAdamshammeredthetableagain。\"Why,youknewtheboywasweak——\" \"Ididnot!\" \"Listen:youkepthimthereafteryougotmadatmyleavingthewayIdid。Youkepthimthereafteryoususpectedhim;andyouhadhimwatched;youlethimgoon;justwaitedtocatchhimandruinhim!\" \"You\'recrazy!\"theoldmanbellowed。\"Ididn\'tknowtherewasanythingagainsttheboytilllastnight。You\'reCRAZY,Isay!\" Adamslookedit。Withhishairdisorderedoverhishaggardforeheadandbloodshoteyes;withhisbruisedhandspoundingthetableandflyinginahundredwildandabsurdgestures,whilehisfeetshuffledconstantlytopreservehisbalanceuponstaggeringlegs,hewasthepictureofamanwithamindgonetorags。 \"MaybeIAMcrazy!\"hecried,hisvoicebreakingandquavering。 \"MaybeIam,butIwouldn\'tstandthereandtauntamanwithitifI\'ddonetohimwhatyou\'vedonetome!Justlookatme:I workedallmylifeforyou,andwhatIdidwhenIquitneverharmedyou——itdidn\'tmaketwocents\'wortho\'differenceinyourlifeanditlookedlikeit\'dmeanallthedifferenceintheworldtomyfamily——andnowlookwhatyou\'veDONEtomeforit!Itellyou,Mr。Lamb,thereneverwasamanlookeduptoanothermanthewayIlookeduptoyouthewholeo\'mylife,butIdon\'tlookuptoyouanymore!Youthinkyougotafinedayofitnow,ridingupinyourautomobiletolookatthatsign——andthenoverhereatmypoorlittleworksthatyou\'veruined。Butlistentomejustthisonelasttime!\"Thecrackingvoicebrokeintofalsetto,andthegesticulatinghandsfluttereduncontrollably。 \"Justyoulisten!\"hepanted。\"YouthinkIdidyouabadturn,andnowyougotmeruinedforit,andyougotmyworksruined,andmyfamilyruined;andifanybody\'d\'a\'toldmethistimelastyearI\'deversaysuchathingtoyouI\'dcalledhimadangliar,butIDOsayit:Isayyou\'veactedtowardmelike——likea——adoggonemean——man!\" Hisvoice,exhausted,likehisbody,wasjustabletodohimthisfinalservice;thenhesank,crumpled,intothechairbythetable,hischindownharduponhischest。 \"Itellyou,you\'recrazy!\"Lambsaidagain。\"Ineverintheworld——\"Buthecheckedhimself,staringinsuddenperplexityathisaccuser。\"Lookhere!\"hesaid。\"What\'sthematterofyou?Haveyougotanotherofthose——?\"HeputhishanduponAdams\'sshoulder,whichjerkedfeeblyunderthetouch。 Theoldmanwenttothedoorandcalledtotheforeman。 \"Here!\"hesaid。\"Runandtellmychauffeurtobringmycaroverhere。Tellhimtodriverightupoverthesidewalkandacrossthelot。Tellhimtohurry!\" So,ithappened,thegreatJ。A。Lambasecondtimebroughthisformerclerkhome,strickenandalmostinanimate。 CHAPTERXXIV Aboutfiveo\'clockthatafternoon,theoldgentlemancamebacktoAdams\'shouse;andwhenAliceopenedthedoor,henodded,walkedintothe\"living-room\"withoutspeaking;thenstoodfrowningasifhehesitatedtodecidesomeperplexingquestion。 \"Well,howishenow?\"heasked,finally。 \"Thedoctorwashereagainalittlewhileago;hethinkspapa\'scomingthroughit。He\'sprettysurehewill。\" \"Somethinglikethewayitwaslastspring?\" \"Yes。\" \"Notabitofsensetoit!\"Lambsaid,gruffly。\"Whenhewasgettingwelltheothertimethedoctortoldmeitwasn\'taregularstroke,sotospeak——this\'cerebraleffusion\'thing。 Saidtherewasn\'tanyparticularreasonforyourfathertoexpecthe\'deverhaveanotherattack,ifhe\'dtakealittlecareofhimself。Saidhecouldconsiderhimselfwellasanybodyelselongashedidthat。\" \"Yes。Buthedidn\'tdoit!\" Lambnodded,sighedaloud,andcrossedtheroomtoachair。\"I guessnot,\"hesaid,ashesatdown。\"Bustin\'hishealthupoverhisglue-works,Iexpect。\" \"Yes。\" \"Iguessso;Iguessso。\"Thenhelookedupatherwithaglimmerofanxietyinhiseyes。\"Hashecametoyet?\" \"Yes。He\'stalkedalittle。Hismind\'sclear;hespoketomamaandmeandtoMissPerry。\"Alicelaughedsadly。\"Wewereluckyenoughtogetherback,butpapadidn\'tseemtothinkitwaslucky。Whenherecognizedherhesaid,\'Oh,mygoodness,\'tisn\'tYOU,isit!\'\" \"Well,that\'sagoodsign,ifhe\'sgettingalittlecross。Didhe——didhehappentosayanything——forinstance,aboutme?\" Thisquestion,awkwardlydelivered,hadtheeffectofremovingthegirl\'spallor;rosytintscamequicklyuponhercheeks。 \"He——yes,hedid,\"shesaid。\"Naturally,he\'stroubledabout——about——\"Shestopped。 \"Aboutyourbrother,maybe?\" \"Yes,aboutmakingupthe——\" \"Here,now,\"Lambsaid,uncomfortably,asshestoppedagain。 \"Listen,younglady;let\'sdon\'ttalkaboutthatjustyet。I wanttoaskyou:youunderstandallaboutthisgluebusiness,I expect,don\'tyou?\" \"I\'mnotsure。Ionlyknow——\" \"Letmetellyou,\"heinterrupted,impatiently。\"I\'lltellyouallaboutitintwowords。Theprocessbelongedtome,andyourfatherupandwalkedoffwithit;there\'snogettingaroundTHAT much,anyhow。\" \"Isn\'tthere?\"Alicestaredathim。\"Ithinkyou\'remistaken,Mr。Lamb。Didn\'tpapaimproveitsothatitvirtuallybelongedtohim?\" Therewasasparkintheoldblueeyesatthis。\"What?\"hecried。\"Isthatthewayhegotaroundit?Why,inallmylifeI neverheardofsucha——\"Butheleftthesentenceunfinished; thetestinesswentoutofhishuskyvoiceandtheangeroutofhiseyes。\"Well,Iexpectmaybethatwasthewayofit,\"hesaid。\"Anyhow,it\'srightforyoutostandupforyourfather; andifyouthinkhehadarighttoit——\" \"Buthedid!\"shecried。 \"Iexpectso,\"theoldmanreturned,pacifically。\"Iexpectso,probably。Anyhow,it\'saquestionthat\'sneitherherenorthere,rightnow。WhatIwasthinkingofsaying——well,didyourfatherhappentoletoutthatheandIhadwordsthismorning?\" \"No。\" \"Well,wedid。\"Hesighedandshookhishead。\"Yourfather——well,heusedsomeprettyhardexpressionstowardme,younglady。Theyweren\'tSO,I\'mgladtosay,butheused\'emtome,andtheworstofitwashebelieved\'em。Well,Ibeenthinkingitover,andIthoughtI\'djusthaveakindoflittletalkwithyoutosetmattersstraight,sotospeak。\" \"Yes,Mr。Lamb。\" \"Forinstance,\"hesaid,\"it\'slikethis。Now,Ihopeyouwon\'tthinkImeananyindelicacy,butyoutakeyourbrother\'scase,sincewegottomentionit,why,yourfatherhadthewholethingworkedoutinhismindaboutaswrongasanybodyevergotanything。IfI\'dactedthewayyourfatherthoughtIdidaboutthat,why,somebodyjustoughttotakemeoutandshootme!DoYOUknowwhatthatmanthought?\" \"I\'mnotsure。\" Hefrownedather,andasked,\"Well,whatdoyouthinkaboutit?\" \"Idon\'tknow,\"shesaid。\"Idon\'tbelieveIthinkanythingatallaboutanythingto-day。\" \"Well,well,\"hereturned;\"Iexpectnot;Iexpectnot。Youkindoflooktomeasifyououghttobeinbedyourself,younglady。\" \"Oh,no。\" \"Iguessyoumean\'Oh,yes\';andIwon\'tkeepyoulong,butthere\'ssomethingwegottogetfixedup,andI\'drathertalktoyouthanIwouldtoyourmother,becauseyou\'reasmartgirlandalwaysfriendly;andIwanttobesureI\'munderstood。Now,listen。\" \"Iwill,\"Alicepromised,smilingfaintly。 \"Ineverevenhardlynoticedyourbrotherwasstillworkingforme,\"heexplained,earnestly。\"Ineverthoughtanythingaboutit。Mysonssortoftriedtoteasemeaboutthewayyourfather——abouthistakingupthisgluebusiness,sotospeak——andonedayAlbert,Junior,askedmeifIfeltallrightaboutyourbrother\'sstayingthereafterthat,andItoldhim——well,Ijustaskedhimtoshutup。Iftheboywantedtostaythere,Ididn\'tconsideritmybusinesstosendhimawayonaccountofanyfeelingIhadtowardhisfather;notaslongashedidhisworkright——andthereportshowedhedid。Well,asithappens,itlooksnowasifhestayedbecauseheHADto;hecouldn\'tquitbecausehe\'d\'a\'beenfoundoutifhedid。Well,he\'dbeencoveringuphisshortageforaconsiderabletime——anddoyouknowwhatyourfatherpracticallychargedmewithaboutthat?\" \"No,Mr。Lamb。\" Inhisresentment,theoldgentleman\'sruddyfacebecameruddierandhishuskyvoicehuskier。\"ThinksIkepttheboytherebecauseIsuspectedhim!ThinksIdidittogetevenwithHIM! DoIlooktoYOUlikeamanthat\'ddosuchathing?\" \"No,\"shesaid,gently。\"Idon\'tthinkyouwould。\" \"No!\"heexclaimed。\"NorHEwouldn\'tthinksoifhewashimself; he\'sknownmetoolong。Buthemustbeensortofbroodingoverthiswholebusiness——ImeanbeforeWalter\'stroublehemustbeentakingittoheartprettyhardforsometimeback。HethoughtI didn\'tthinkmuchofhimanymore——andIexpecthemaybewonderedsomewhatIwasgoingtoDO——andthere\'snothingworse\'nthatstateofmindtomakeamansuspiciousofallkindsofmeanness。 Well,hepracticallystoodupthereandaccusedmetomyfaceoffixingthingsso\'thecouldn\'teverraisethemoneytosettleforWalterandaskusnottoprosecute。That\'sthestateofmindyourfather\'sbroodinggothiminto,younglady——chargingmewithatricklikethat!\" \"I\'msorry,\"shesaid。\"Iknowyou\'dnever——\" Theoldmanslappedhissturdyknee,angrily。\"Why,thatdangfoolofaVirgilAdams!\"heexclaimed。\"Hewouldn\'tevengivemeachancetotalk;andhegotmesomadIcouldn\'thardlytalk,anyway!Hemight\'a\'knownfromthefirstIwasn\'tgoingtolethimwalkinandbeatmeoutofmyown——thatis,hemight\'a\' knownIwouldn\'tlethimgetaheadofmeinabusinessmatter——notwithmyboystwittingmeaboutiteveryfewminutes! Buttotalktomethewayhedidthismorning——well,hewasoutofhishead;that\'sall!Now,waitjustaminute,\"heinterposed,assheseemedabouttospeak。\"Inthefirstplace,wearen\'tgoingtopushthiscaseagainstyourbrother。I believeinthelaw,allright,andbusinessmengottoprotectthemselves;butinacaselikethis,whererestitution\'smadebythefamily,why,Iexpectit\'sjustaswellsometimestousealittleinfluenceandletmattersdrop。Ofcourseyourbrother\'llhavetokeepouto\'thisstate;that\'sall。\" \"But——yousaid——\"shefaltered。 \"Yes。What\'dIsay?\" \"Yousaid,\'whererestitution\'smadebythefamily。\'That\'swhatseemedtotroublepapasoterribly,because——becauserestitutioncouldn\'t——\" \"Why,yes,itcould。That\'swhatI\'mheretotalktoyouabout。\" \"Idon\'tsee——\" \"I\'mgoingtoTELLyou,ain\'tI?\"hesaid,gruffly。\"Justholdyourhorsesaminute,please。\"Hecoughed,rosefromhischair,walkedupanddowntheroom,thenhaltedbeforeher。\"It\'slikethis,\"hesaid。\"AfterIbroughtyourfatherhome,thismorning,therewasoneofthethingshetoldme,whenhewasgoingforme,overyonder——itkindofstuckinmycraw。Itwassomethingaboutallthisgluecontroversynotmeaninganythingtomeinparticular,andmeaningawholeheaptohimandhisfamily。 Well,hewaswrongaboutthattwoways。Thefirstonewas,itdidmeanagooddealtometohavehimgobackonmeaftersomanyyears。Idon\'tneedtosayanymoreaboutit,exceptjusttotellyouitmeantquitealittlemoretomethanyou\'dthink,maybe。Theotherwayhewaswrongis,thathowmuchathingmeanstoonemanandhowlittleitmeanstoanotherain\'ttherightwaytolookatabusinessmatter。\" \"Isupposeitisn\'t,Mr。Lamb。\" \"No,\"hesaid。\"Itisn\'t。It\'snottherightwaytolookatanything。Yes,andyourfatherknowsitaswellasIdo,whenhe\'sinhisrightmind;andIexpectthat\'soneofthereasonshegotsomadatme——butanyhow,Icouldn\'thelpthinkingabouthowmuchallthisthingHADmaybemeanttohim;——asIsay,itkindofstuckinmycraw。Iwantyoutotellhimsomethingfromme,andIwantyoutogoandtellhimrightoff,ifhe\'sableandwillingtolisten。YoutellhimIgotkindofanotionhewaspushedintothisthingbycircumstances,andtellhimI\'velivedlongenoughtoknowthatcircumstancescanbeatthebestofus——youtellhimIsaid\'theBESTofus。\'TellhimIhaven\'tgotabitoffeelingagainsthim——notanymore——andtellhimIcameheretoaskhimnottohaveanyagainstme。\" \"Yes,Mr。Lamb。\" \"TellhimIsaid——\"TheoldmanpausedabruptlyandAlicewassurprised,inadullandtiredway,whenshesawthathislipshadbeguntotwitchandhiseyelidstoblink;butherecoveredhimselfalmostatonce,andcontinued:\"Iwanthimtoremember,\'Forgiveusourtransgressions,asweforgivethosethattransgressagainstus\';andifheandIbeentransgressingagainsteachother,why,tellhimIthinkit\'stimeweQUITsuchfoolishness!\" Hecoughedagain,smiledheartilyuponher,andwalkedtowardthedoor;thenturnedbacktoherwithanexclamation:\"Well,ifI ain\'tanoldfool!\" \"Whatisit?\"sheasked。 \"Why,Iforgotwhatwewerejusttalkingabout!YourfatherwantstosettleforWalter\'sdeficit。Tellhimwe\'llbegladtoacceptit;butofcoursewedon\'texpecthimtocleanthematterupuntilhe\'sabletotalkbusinessagain。\" Alicestaredathimblanklyenoughforhimtoperceivethatfurtherexplanationswerenecessary。\"It\'slikethis,\"hesaid。 \"Yousee,ifyourfatherdecidedtokeephisworksgoingoveryonder,Idon\'tsaybuthemightgiveussomelittlecompetitionforatime,\'speciallyashe\'sgotthestartonusandaboutreadyforthemarket。ThenIwasfiguringwecouldusehisplant——it\'ssmall,butit\'dbetoourbenefittohavetheuseofit——andhe\'sgotaleaseonthatbiglot;itmaycomeinhandyforusifwewanttoexpandsome。Well,I\'dprefertomakeadealwithhimasquietlyaspossible——nogoodineveryTom,DickandHarryhearingaboutthingslikethis——butIfiguredhecouldsellouttomeforalittlesomethingmore\'nenoughtocoverthemortgageheputonthishouse,andWalter\'sdeficit,too——THAT don\'tamounttomuchindollarsandcents。ThewayIfigureit,Icouldofferhimaboutninety-threehundreddollarsasatotal——orsayninety-threehundredandfifty——andifhefeelslikeaccepting,why,I\'llsendaconfidentialmanupherewiththepaperssoon\'syourfather\'sabletolook\'emover。Youtellhim,willyou,andaskhimifheseeshiswaytoacceptingthatfigure?\" \"Yes,\"Alicesaid;andnowherownlipstwitched,whilehereyesfilledsothatshesawbutablurredimageoftheoldman,whoheldouthishandinparting。\"I\'lltellhim。Thankyou。\" Heshookherhandhastily。\"Well,let\'sjustkeepitkindofquiet,\"hesaid,atthedoor。\"NogoodineveryTom,DickandHarryknowingallwhatgoesonintown!Youtelephonemewhenyourpapa\'sreadytogooverthepapers——andcallmeupatmyhouseto-night,willyou?Letmehearhowhe\'sfeeling?\" \"Iwill,\"shesaid,andthroughhergratefultearsgavehimasmilealmostradiant。\"He\'llbebetter,Mr。Lamb。Weallwill。\" CHAPTERXXV Onemorning,thatautumn,Mrs。AdamscameintoAlice\'sroom,andfoundhercompletingasobertoiletforthestreet;moreover,theexpressionrevealedinhermirrorwasharmoniouswiththebusiness-likeseverityofherattire。\"Whatmakesyoulooksocross,dearie?\"themotherasked。\"Couldn\'tyoufindanythingnicertowearthanthatplainolddarkdress?\" \"Idon\'tbelieveI\'mcross,\"thegirlsaid,absently。\"IbelieveI\'mjustthinking。Isn\'titabouttime?\" \"Timeforwhat?\" \"Timeforthinking——forme,Imean?\" Disregardingthis,Mrs。Adamslookedheroverthoughtfully。\"I can\'tseewhyyoudon\'twearmorecolour,\"shesaid。\"Atyourageit\'sbecomingandproper,too。Anyhow,whenyou\'regoingonthestreet,Ithinkyououghttolookjustasgayandlivelyasyoucanmanage。Youwanttoshow\'emyou\'vegotsomespunk!\" \"Howdoyoumean,mama?\" \"ImeanaboutWalter\'srunningawayandthemessyourfathermadeofhisbusiness。Itwouldhelptoshow\'emyou\'reholdingupyourheadjustthesame。\" \"Showwhom!\" \"Alltheseothergirlsthat——\" \"NotI!\"Alicelaughedshortly,shakingherhead。\"I\'vequitdressingatthem,andiftheysawmetheywouldn\'tthinkwhatyouwant\'emto。It\'sfunny;butwedon\'toftenmakepeoplethinkwhatwewant\'emto,mama。Youdothusandso;andyoutellyourself,\'Now,seeingmedothusandso,peoplewillnaturallythinkthisandthat\';buttheydon\'t。Theythinksomethingelse——usuallyjustwhatyouDON\'Twant\'emto。Isupposeabouttheonlygoodinpretendingisthefunwegetoutoffoolingourselvesthatwefoolsomebody。\" \"Well,butitwouldn\'tbepretending。Yououghttoletpeopleseeyou\'restillholdingyourheadupbecauseyouARE。Youwouldn\'twantthatMildredPalmertothinkyou\'recastdownabout——well,youknowyouwouldn\'twantHERnottothinkyou\'reholdingyourheadup,wouldyou?\" \"Shewouldn\'tknowwhetherIamornot,mama。\"Alicebitherlip,thensmiledfaintlyasshesaid: \"Anyhow,I\'mnotthinkingaboutmyheadinthatway——notthismorning,I\'mnot。\" Mrs。Adamsdroppedthesubjectcasually。\"Areyougoingdown-town?\"sheinquired。 \"Yes。\" \"Whatfor?\" \"JustsomethingIwanttoseeabout。I\'lltellyouwhenIcomeback。Anythingyouwantmetodo?\" \"No;Iguessnotto-day。Ithoughtyoumightlookforarug,butI\'drathergowithyoutoselectit。We\'llhavetogetanewrugforyourfather\'sroom,Iexpect。\" \"I\'mgladyouthinkso,mama。Idon\'tsupposehe\'severevennoticedit,butthatoldrugofhis——well,really!\" \"Ididn\'tmeanforhim,\"hermotherexplained,thoughtfully。 \"No;hedon\'tmindit,andhe\'dlikelymakeafussifwechangeditonhisaccount。No;whatImeant——we\'llhavetoputyourfatherinWalter\'sroom。Hewon\'tmind,Idon\'texpect——notmuch。\" \"No,Isupposenot,\"Aliceagreed,rathersadly。\"Iheardthebellawhileago。Wasitsomebodyaboutthat?\" \"Yes;justbeforeIcameupstairs。Mrs。Lohrgavehimanotetome,andhewasreallyaverypleasant-lookingyoungman。AVERY pleasant-lookingyoungman,\"Mrs。Adamsrepeatedwithincreasedanimationandathoughtfulglanceatherdaughter。\"He\'saMr。 WillDickson;hehasafirst-ratepositionwiththegasworks,Mrs。Lohrsays,andhe\'sfullyabletoaffordaniceroom。SoifyouandIdoubleupinhere,thenwiththatyoungmarriedcoupleinmyroom,andthisMr。Dicksoninyourfather\'s,we\'lljustabouthavethingssettled。IthoughtmaybeIcouldmakeonemoreplaceattable,too,sothatwiththeotherpeoplefromoutsidewe\'dbeservingelevenaltogether。YouseeifIhavetopaythiscooktwelvedollarsaweek——itcan\'tbehelped,I guess——well,onemorewouldcertainlyhelptowardaprofit。Ofcourseit\'saterriblyworryingthingtoseehowweWILLcomeout。Don\'tyousupposewecouldsqueezeinonemore?\" \"IsupposeitCOULDbemanaged;yes。\" Mrs。Adamsbrightened。\"I\'msureit\'llbepleasanthavingthatyoungmarriedcoupleinthehouseandespeciallythisMr。WillDickson。Heseemedverymuchofagentleman,andanxioustogetsettledingoodsurroundings。Iwasveryfavourablyimpressedwithhimineveryway;andheexplainedtomeabouthisname;itseemsitisn\'tWilliam,it\'sjust\'Will\';hisparentshadhimchristenedthatway。It\'scurious。\"Shepaused,andthen,withanefforttoseemcasual,whichveilednothingfromherdaughter: \"It\'sQUITEcurious,\"shesaidagain。\"Butit\'sratherattractiveanddifferent,don\'tyouthink?\" \"Poormama!\"Alicelaughedcompassionately。\"Poormama!\" \"Heis,though,\"Mrs。Adamsmaintained。\"He\'sverymuchofagentleman,unlessI\'mnojudgeofappearances;andit\'llreallybenicetohavehiminthehouse。\" \"Nodoubt,\"Alicesaid,assheopenedherdoortodepart。\"I don\'tsupposewe\'llmindhavinganyof\'emasmuchaswethoughtwewould。Good-bye。\" Buthermotherdetainedher,catchingherbythearm。\"Alice,youdohateit,don\'tyou!\" \"No,\"thegirlsaid,quickly。\"Therewasn\'tanythingelsetodo。\" Mrs。Adamsbecameemotionalatonce:herfacecriedtragedy,andhervoicemisfortune。\"ThereMIGHThavebeensomethingelsetodo!Oh,Alice,yougaveyourfatherbadadvicewhenyouupheldhimintakingamiserablelittleninety-threehundredandfiftyfromthatoldwretch!Ifyourfather\'djusthadthegumptiontoholdout,they\'dhavehadtopayhimanythingheasked。Ifhe\'djusthadthegumptionandalittlemanlyCOURAGE——\" \"Hush!\"Alicewhispered,forhermother\'svoicegrewlouder。 \"Hush!He\'llhearyou,mama。\" \"Couldhehearmetoooften?\"theembitteredladyasked。\"Ifhe\'dlistenedtomeattherighttime,wouldwehavetobetakinginboardersandsinkingDOWNinthescaleattheendofourlives,insteadofgoingUP?Youwerebothwrong;wedidn\'tneedtobesopanicky——thatwasjustwhatthatoldmanwanted:toscareusandbuyusoutfornothing!Ifyourfather\'djustlistenedtomethen,orifforonceinhislifehe\'djustbeenhalfaMAN——\" Aliceputherhandoverhermother\'smouth。\"Youmustn\'t!HeWILLhearyou!\" ButfromtheothersideofAdams\'scloseddoorhisvoicecamequerulously。\"Oh,IHEARher,allright!\" \"Yousee,mama?\"Alicesaid,and,asMrs。Adamsturnedaway,weeping,thedaughtersighed;thenwentintospeaktoherfather。 Hewasinhisoldchairbythetable,withapillowbehindhishead,butthecrochetedscarfandMrs。Adams\'swrapperswathedhimnomore;heworeadressing-gownhiswifehadboughtforhim,andwassmokinghispipe。\"Theoldstory,isit?\"hesaid,asAlicecamein。\"Thesame,sameoldstory!Well,well!Hasshegone?\" \"Yes,papa。\" \"Gotyourhaton,\"hesaid。\"Whereyougoing?\" \"I\'mgoingdown-townonanerrandofmyown。Isthereanythingyouwant,papa?\" \"Yes,thereis。\"Hesmiledather。\"Iwishyou\'dsitdownawhileandtalktomeunlessyourerrand——\" \"No,\"shesaid,takingachairnearhim。\"IwasjustgoingdowntoseeaboutsomearrangementsIwasmakingformyself。There\'snohurry。\" \"Whatarrangementsforyourself,dearie?\" \"I\'lltellyouafterwards——afterIfindoutsomethingabout\'emmyself。\" \"Allright,\"hesaid,indulgently。\"Keepyoursecrets;keepyoursecrets。\"Hepaused,drewmusinglyuponhispipe,andshookhishead。\"Funny——thewayyourmotherlooksatthings!Forthemattero\'that,everything\'sprettyfunny,Iexpect,ifyoustoptothinkaboutit。Forinstance,lethersayallshelikes,butwewerepushedrightspangtothewall,ifJ。A。Lambhadn\'ttakenitintohisheadtomakethatofferfortheworks;andthere\'soneofthethingsIbeenthinkingaboutlately,Alice: thinkingabouthowfunnytheyworkout。\" \"Whatdidyouthinkaboutit,papa!\" \"Well,I\'veseenithappeninotherpeople\'slives,timeandtimeagain;andnowit\'shappenedinours。Youthinkyou\'regoingtobepushedrightupagainstthewall;youcan\'tseeanywayout,oranyhopeatall;youthinkyou\'reGONE——andthensomethingyounevercountedonturnsup;and,whilemaybeyouneverdogetbacktowhereyouusedtobe,yetsomehowyoukindofsquirmoutofbeingrightSPANGagainstthewall。Youkeepongoing——maybeyoucan\'tgomuch,butyoudogoalittle。SeewhatImean?\" \"Yes。Iunderstand,dear。\" \"Yes,I\'mafraidyoudo,\"hesaid。\"Toobad!Yououghtn\'ttounderstanditatyourage。ItseemstomeagooddealasiftheLordreallymeantfortheyoungpeopletohavethegoodtimes,andfortheoldtohavethetroubles;andwhenanybodyasyoungasyouhastroublethere\'sabigmistakesomewhere。\" \"Oh,no!\"sheprotested。 Buthepersistedwhimsicallyinthisviewofdivineerror:\"Yes,itdoeslookagooddealthatway。Butofcoursewecan\'ttell; we\'renevercertainaboutanything——notaboutanythingatall。 SometimesIlookatitanotherway,though。Sometimesitlookstomeasifabody\'stroublescameonhimmainlybecausehehadn\'thadsenseenoughtoknowhownottohaveany——asifhistroubleswerekindoflikeaboy\'sgettingkeptinafterschoolbytheteacher,togivehimdiscipline,orsomethingorother。 But,my,my!Wedon\'tlearneasy!\"Hechuckledmournfully。\"Nottolearnhowtolivetillwe\'reaboutreadytodie,itcertainlyseemstomedangtough!\" \"ThenIwouldn\'tbroodonsuchanotion,papa,\"shesaid。 \"\'Brood?\'No!\"hereturned。\"Ijustkindo\'mullitover。\"Hechuckledagain,sighed,andthen,notlookingather,hesaid,\"ThatMr。Russell——yourmothertellsmehehasn\'tbeenhereagain——notsince——\" \"No,\"shesaid,quietly,asAdamspaused。\"Henevercameagain。\" \"Well,butmaybe——\" \"No,\"shesaid。\"Thereisn\'tany\'maybe。\'Itoldhimgood-byethatnight,papa。ItwasbeforeheknewaboutWalter——Itoldyou。\" \"Well,well,\"Adamssaid。\"Youngpeopleareentitledtotheirownprivacy;Idon\'twanttopry。\"Heemptiedhispipeintoachippedsauceronthetablebesidehim,laidthepipeaside,andrevertedtoaformertopic。\"Speakingofdying——\" \"Well,butweweren\'t!\"Aliceprotested。 \"Yes,aboutnotknowinghowtolivetillyou\'rethroughliving——andTHENmaybenot!\"hesaid,chucklingathisowndeterminedpessimism。\"IseeI\'mprettyoldbecauseItalkthisway——IremembermygrandmothersayingthingsagooddeallikeallwhatI\'msayingnow;IusedtohearheratitwhenIwasayoungfellow——shewasarightgloomyoldlady,Iremember。Well,anyhow,itremindsme:IwanttogetonmyfeetagainassoonasIcan;Igottolookaroundandfindsomethingtogointo。\" Aliceshookherheadgently。\"But,papa,hetoldyou——\" \"Nevermindthrowingthatdangdoctorupatme!\"Adamsinterrupted,peevishly。\"HesaidI\'dbegoodforSOMEkindoflightjob——ifIcouldfindjusttherightthing。\'Wheretherewouldn\'tbeeitheranyphysicalormentalstrain,\'hesaid。 Well,Igottofindsomethinglikethat。Anyway,I\'llfeelbetterifIcanjustgetoutLOOKINGforit。\" \"But,papa,I\'mafraidyouwon\'tfindit,andyou\'llbedisappointed。\" \"Well,IwanttohuntaroundandSEE,anyhow。\" Alicepattedhishand。\"Youmustjustbecontented,papa。 Everything\'sgoingtobeallright,andyoumustn\'tgettoworryingaboutdoinganything。Weownthishouseit\'sallclear——andyou\'vetakencareofmamaandmeallourlives;nowit\'sourturn。\" \"No,sir!\"hesaid,querulously。\"Idon\'tliketheideaofbeingthelandlady\'shusbandaroundaboarding-house;itgoesagainstmygizzard。_I_know:makesoutthebillsforhiswifeSundaymornings——workswithascrew-driveronsomebody\'sbureaudrawersometimes——\'tendsthefurnacemaybe——onetheboardersgiveshimacigarnowandthen。That\'saFINElifetolookforwardto!No,sir;Idon\'twanttofinishasalandlady\'shusband!\" Alicelookedgrave;forsheknewthesketchwasbuttooaccuratelypropheticineveryprobability。\"But,papa,\"shesaid,toconsolehim,\"don\'tyouthinkmaybethereisn\'tsuchathingasa\'finish,\'afterall!Yousayperhapswedon\'tlearntolivetillwediebutmaybethat\'showitisAFTERwedie,too——justlearningsomemore,thewaywedohere,andmaybethroughtroubleagain,evenafterthat。\" \"Oh,itmightbe,\"hesighed。\"Iexpectso。\" \"Well,then,\"shesaid,\"what\'stheuseoftalkingabouta\'finish?\'Wedokeeplookingaheadtothingsasifthey\'dfinishsomething,butwhenwegetTOthem,theydon\'tfinishanything。 They\'rejustpartofgoingon。I\'lltellyou——IlookedaheadallsummertosomethingIwasafraidof,andIsaidtomyself,\'Well,ifthathappens,I\'mfinished!\'Butitwasn\'tso,papa。Itdidhappen,andnothing\'sfinished;I\'mgoingon,justthesameonly——\"Shestoppedandblushed。 \"Onlywhat?\"heasked。 \"Well——\"Sheblushedmoredeeply,thenjumpedup,and,standingbeforehim,caughtbothhishandsinhers。\"Well,don\'tyouthink,sincewedohavetogoon,weoughtatleasttohavelearnedsomesenseabouthowtodoit?\" Helookedupatheradoringly。 \"What_I_think,\"hesaid,andhisvoicetrembled;——\"Ithinkyou\'rethesmartestgirlintheworld!Iwouldn\'ttradeyouforthewholekit-and-boodleof\'em!\" Butasthisfollyofhisthreatenedtomakehertearful,shekissedhimhastily,andwentforthuponhererrand。 Sincethenightofthetragic-comicdinnershehadnotseenRussell,norcaughteventheremotestchanceglimpseofhim;anditwascuriousthatsheshouldencounterhimasshewentuponsuchanerrandasnowengagedher。Atacorner,notfarfromthattobacconist\'sshopshehadjustleftwhenheovertookherandwalkedwithherforthefirsttime,shemethimto-day。Heturnedthecorner,comingtowardher,andtheywerefacetoface; whereuponthatengagingfaceofRussell\'swasinstantlyreddened,butAlice\'sremainedserene。 Shestoppedshort,though;andsodidhe;thenshesmiledbrightlyassheputoutherhand。 \"Why,Mr。Russell!\" \"I\'mso——I\'msogladtohavethis——thischance,\"hestammered。 \"I\'vewantedtotellyou——it\'sjustthatgoingintoanewundertaking——thisbusinesslife——onedoesn\'tgettodoagreatmanythingshe\'dliketo。Ihopeyou\'llletmecallagainsometime,ifIcan。\" \"Yes,do!\"shesaid,cordially,andthen,withaquicknod,wentbrisklyon。 Shebreathedmorerapidly,butknewthathecouldnothavedetectedit,andshetooksomeprideinherselfforthewayshehadmetthislittlecrisis。Buttohavemetitwithsucheasycouragemeanttohersomethingmorereassuringthanamomentaryprideintheserenityshehadshown。Forshefoundthatwhatshehadresolvedinherinmostheartwasnowreallytrue:shewas\"throughwithallthat!\" Shewalkedon,butmoreslowly,forthetobacconist\'sshopwasnotfarfromhernow——and,beyondit,thatportalofdoom,Frincke\'sBusinessCollege。AlreadyAlicecouldreadthebegrimedgiltlettersofthesign;andalthoughtheyhadspelleddestinyneverwithamorepainfulimminencethanjustthen,anoldhabitofdramatizingherselfstillprevailedwithher。 TherecameintohermindawhimsicalcomparisonofherfatewiththatoftheheroineinaFrenchromanceshehadreadlongagoandrememberedwell,forshehadcriedoverit。Thestoryendedwiththeheroine\'stakingtheveilafteradeathblowtolove;andthefinalsceneagainbecamevividtoAlice,foramoment。Again,aswhenshehadreadandwept, sheseemedherselftostandamongthegreatshadowsinthecathedralnave;smelledthesmokyincenseontheenclosedair,andheardthesolemnpulsesoftheorgan。Sherememberedhowthenovice\'sfatherknelt,trembling,besideapillarofgraystone;howthefaithlessloverwatchedandshiveredbehindthestatueofasaint;howstifledsobsandoutcrieswereheardwhenthenovicecametothealtar;andhowashaftoflightstruckthroughtherose-window,envelopingherinanamberglow。 Itwasthevisionofamomentonly,andfornolongerthanamomentdidAlicetellherselfthattheromanceprovidedaprettierwayoftakingtheveilthanshehadchosen,andthatafaithlesslover,shakingwithremorsebehindasaint\'sstatue,wasagreatersolacethanoneleftonastreetcornerprotestingthathe\'dliketocallsometime——ifhecould!Herpityforherselfvanishedmorereluctantly;butsheshookitoffandtriedtosmileatit,andatherromanticrecollections——atallofthem。Shehadsomethingimportanttothinkof。 Shepassedthetobacconist\'s,andbeforeherwasthatdarkentrancetothewoodenstairwayleadinguptoFrincke\'sBusinessCollege——theverydoorwayshehadalwayslookeduponastheendofyouthandtheendofhope。 Howoftenshehadgonebyhere,hatingthedrearyobscurityofthatstairway;howoftenshehadthoughtofthisobscurityassomethinglyinginwaittoobliteratethefootstepsofanygirlwhoshouldascendintothesmokydarknessabove!Neverhadshepassedwithoutthoseominousimaginingsofhers:prettygirlsturningintooldmaids\"takingdictation\"——oldmaidsofadozendifferenttypes,yetalllookingalittlelikeherself。 Well,shewashereatlast!Shelookedupanddownthestreetquickly,andthen,withalittleheaveoftheshoulders,shewentbravelyin,underthesign,andbegantoclimbthewoodensteps。 Half-wayuptheshadowswereheaviest,butafterthattheplacebegantoseembrighter。Therewasanopenwindowoverheadsomewhere,shefound;andthestepsatthetopweregaywithsunshine。