第13章

类别:其他 作者:Louisa May Alcott字数:11269更新时间:18/12/18 09:19:01
Rosestoodstill,appalledbythissuddenknowledgeofhowmuchgreatertheevilwasthanshehaddreamed。Whatoughtshetodo?Gowithhercousin,andbysodoingtacitlypledgeherselfashiscompaniononthatlongerjourneyforwhichhewasasyetsopoorlyequipped?Bothheartandconscienceprotestedagainstthissostronglythatsheputthethoughtaway。Butcompassionpleadedforhimtenderly,andthespiritofself—sacrifice,whichmakeswomenlovetogivemorethantheyreceive,causedhertofeelasifinameasurethisman\'sfatelayinherhands,tobedecidedforgoodorillthroughher。Howshouldshebetruebothtohimandtoherself? Beforethisquestioncouldbeanswered,hewasbackagain,lookingasifhehadlefthiscarebehindhim,forhismoodsvariedlikethewind。 Herattitude,asshestoodmotionlessandalonewithdowncastface,wassounlikethecheerfulcreaturewhocametomeethimanhourago,itfilledhimwithself—reproach,and,comingup,hedrewonehandthroughhisarm,saying,assheinvoluntarilyfollowedhim,\"Youmustnotstandstill。Forgetmyheroicsandanswermyquestion。Willyougowithus,Rose?\" \"Notnow­thatisaskingtoomuch,Charlie,andIwillpromisenothing,becauseIcannotdoithonestly,\"sheanswered,sofirmlythatheknewappealwasuseless。 \"AmItogoalone,then,leavingallIcareforbehindme?\" \"No,takeyourmotherwithyou,anddoyourbesttoreuniteyourparents。 Youcouldnotgiveyourselftoabettertask。\" \"Shewon\'tgowithoutyou。\" \"Ithinkshewillifyouholdfasttoyourresolution。Youwon\'tgivethatup,Ihope?\" \"No­Imustgosomewhere,forIcan\'tstayhere,anditmayaswellbeIndia,sincethatpleasesFather,\"answeredCharliedoggedly。 \"Itwillmorethanyoucanimagine。Tellhimallthetruth,andseehowgladhewillbetohelpyou,andhowsincerelyhewillrespectyouforwhatyou\'vedone。\" \"Ifyourespectme,Idon\'tcaremuchabouttheopinionofanyoneelse,\" answeredCharlie,clingingwithalover\'spertinacitytothehopethatwasdearest。 \"Ishall,ifyougomanfullyawayanddothedutyyouoweyourfatherandyourself。\" \"AndwhenI\'vedoneit,mayIcomebacktoberewarded,Rose?\"heasked,takingpossessionofthehandonhisarmasifitwasalreadyhis。 \"IwishIcouldsaywhatyouwantmeto。ButhowcanIpromisewhenIamnotsureofanything?Idon\'tloveyouasIought,andperhapsInevershall­sowhypersistinmakingmebindmyselfinthisway?Begenerous,Charlie,anddon\'taskit,\"imploredRose,muchafflictedbyhispersistence。 \"Ithoughtyoudidloveme­itlookedverylikeitamonthago,unlessyouhaveturnedcoquette,andIcan\'tquitebelievethat,\"heansweredbitterly。 \"Iwasbeginningtoloveyou,butyoumademeafraidtogoon,\" murmuredRose,tryingtotellthetruthkindly。 \"Thatcursedcustom!Whatcanamandowhenhishostessaskshimtodrinkwinewithher?\"AndCharlielookedasifhecouldhavecursedhimselfevenmoreheartily。 \"Hecansay\'no。\'\" \"Ican\'t。\" \"Ah,that\'sthetrouble!Youneverlearnedtosayiteventoyourself,andnowitissohard,youwantmetohelpyou。\" \"Andyouwon\'t。\" \"Yes,Iwill,byshowingyouthatIcansayittomyself,foryoursake。\"AndRoselookedupwithafacesofulloftendersorrowhecouldnotdoubtthewordswhichbothreproachedandcomfortedhim。 \"Mylittlesaint!Idon\'tdeserveonehalfyourgoodnesstome,butIwill,andgoawaywithoutonecomplainttodomybest,foryoursake,\" hecried,touchedbyhergriefandstirredtoemulationbytheexampleofcourageandintegrityshetriedtosethim。 HereKittyandSteveboredownuponthem;and,obeyingtheimpulsetoputcarebehindthem,whichmakesitpossibleforyoungheartstoacheoneminuteanddancethenext,RoseandCharliebanishedtheirtroubles,joinedinthesportthatsoonturnedthelonelylittlebayintoaballroom,andenjoyedthesplendorsofawintersunsetforgetfulofseparationandCalcutta。Chapter15。Chapter15。15ALASFORCHARLIE!Inspiteofmuchinternalrebellion,Charlieheldfasttohisresolution,andAuntClara,findingallpersuasionsvain,gaveinandinastateofchronicindignationagainsttheworldingeneralandRoseinparticular,preparedtoaccompanyhim。Thepoorgirlhadahardtimeofitand,butforheruncle,wouldhavefaredstillworse。HewasasortofshielduponwhichMrs。Clara\'slamentations,reproaches,andirateglancesfellunavailinglyinsteadofwoundingtheheartagainstwhichtheywereaimed。 Thedayspassedveryquicklynow,foreveryoneseemedanxioustohavethepartingoverandpreparationswentonrapidly。Thebighousewasmadereadytoshutupforayearatleast,comfortsforthelongvoyagelaidin,andfarewellvisitspaid。ThegeneralactivityandexcitementrendereditimpossibleforCharlietoleadthelifeofanartistichermitanylongerandhefellintoarestlessconditionwhichcausedRosetolongforthedepartureoftheRajahwhenshefeltthathewouldbesafe,forthesefarewellfestivitiesweredangeroustoonewhowasjustlearningtosay\"no。\" \"Halfthemonthsafelygone。Ifwecanonlygetwellovertheselastweeks,agreatweightwillbeoffmymind,\"thoughtRoseasshewentdownonewild,wetmorningtowardtheendofFebruary。 Openingthestudydoortogreetheruncle,sheexclaimed,\"Why,Archie!\" thenpauseduponthethreshold,transfixedbyfear,forinhercousin\'swhitefaceshereadthetidingsofsomegreataffliction。 \"Hush!Don\'tbefrightened。ComeinandI\'lltellyou,\"hewhispered,puttingdownthebottlehehadjusttakenfromthedoctor\'smedicinecloset。 Roseunderstoodandobeyed,forAuntPlentywaspoorlywithherrheumatismanddependedonhermorningdoze。 \"Whatisit?\"shesaid,lookingabouttheroomwithashiver,asifexpectingtoseeagainwhatshesawthereNewYear\'snight。Archiewasalone,however,and,drawinghertowardthecloset,answeredwithanevidentefforttobequitecalmandsteady­\"Charlieishurt!Unclewantsmoreetherandthewidebandagesinsomedrawerorother。Hetoldme,butI forget。Youkeepthisplaceinorder­findthemforme。Quick!\" Beforehehaddone,Rosewasatthedrawer,turningoverthebandageswithhandsthattrembledastheysearched。 \"Allnarrow!Imustmakesome。Canyouwait?\"And,catchingupapieceofoldlinen,shetoreitintowidestrips,adding,inthesamequicktone,asshebegantorollthem,\"Now,tellme。\" \"Icanwait­thosearenotneededjustyet。Ididn\'tmeananyoneshouldknow,youleastofall,\"beganArchie,smoothingoutthestripsastheylayacrossthetableandevidentlysurprisedatthegirl\'snerveandskill。 \"Icanbearit­makehaste!Ishemuchhurt?\" \"I\'mafraidheis。Unclelookssober,andthepoorboysuffersso,I couldn\'tstay,\"answeredArchie,turningstillwhiteraboutthelipsthatneverhadsohardataletotellbefore。 \"Yousee,hewenttotownlasteveningtomeetthemanwhoisgoingtobuyBrutus­\" \"AndBrutusdidit?Iknewhewould!\"criedRose,droppingherworktowringherhands,asifsheguessedtheendingofthestorynow。 \"Yes,andifhewasn\'tshotalreadyI\'ddoitmyselfwithpleasure,forhe\'sdonehisbesttokillCharlie,\"mutteredCharlie\'smatewithagrimlook,thengaveagreatsighandaddedwithavertedface,\"Ishouldn\'tblamethebrute,itwasn\'thisfault。Heneededafirmhandand­\"Hestoppedthere,butRosesaidquickly:\"Goon。Imustknow。\" \"Charliemetsomeofhisoldcronies,quitebyaccident;therewasadinnerparty,andtheymadehimgo,justforagood—bye,theysaid。Hecouldn\'trefuse,anditwastoomuchforhim。Hewouldcomehomealoneinthestorm,thoughtheytriedtokeephim,ashewasn\'tfit。Downbythenewbridge­thathighembankment,youknow­thewindhadputthelanternout­heforgot­orsomethingscaredBrutus,andallwentdowntogether。\" ArchiehadspokenfastandbrokenlybutRoseunderstoodandatthelastwordhidherfacewithalittlemoan,asifshesawitall。 \"Drinkthisandnevermindtherest,\"hesaid,dashingintothenextroomandcomingbackwithaglassofwater,longingtobedoneandaway,forthissortofpainseemedalmostasbadasthathehadleft。 Rosedrank,butheldhisarmtightly,ashewouldhaveturnedaway,sayinginatoneofcommandhecouldnotdisobey:\"Don\'tkeepanythingback­tellmetheworstatonce。\" \"Weknewnothingofit,\"hewentonobediently。\"AuntClarathoughthewaswithme,andnoonefoundhimtillearlythismorning。Aworkmanrecognizedhimandhewasbroughthome,deadtheythought。IcameforUncleanhourago。Charlieisconsciousnow,butawfullyhurt,andI\'mafraidfromthewayMacandUnclelookedatoneanotherthat­Oh!Thinkofit,Rose!Crushedandhelpless,aloneintherainallnight,andIneverknew,Ineverknew!\" Withthat,poorArchiebrokedownentirelyand,flinginghimselfintoachair,laidhisfaceonthetable,sobbinglikeagirl。Rosehadneverseenamancrybefore,anditwassounlikeawoman\'sgentlergriefthatitmovedherverymuch。Puttingbyherownanguish,shetriedtocomforthisand,goingtohim,lifteduphisheadandmadehimleanonher,forinsuchhoursasthiswomenarethestronger。Itwasaverylittletodo,butitdidcomfortArchie,forthepoorfellowfeltasiffatewasveryharduponhimjustthen,andinthisfaithfulbosomhecouldpourhisbriefbutpatheticplaint。 \"Phebe\'sgone,andnowifCharlie\'staken,Idon\'tseehowIcanbearit!\" \"Phebewillcomeback,dear,andletushopepoorCharlieisn\'tgoingtobetakenyet。Suchthingsalwaysseemworstatfirst,I\'veheardpeoplesay,socheerupandhopeforthebest,\"answeredRose,seekingforsomecomfortablewordstosayandfindingveryfew。 Theytookeffect,however,forArchiedidcheeruplikeaman。Wipingawaythetearswhichhesoseldomshedthattheydidnotknowwheretogo,hegotup,gavehimselfalittleshake,andsaidwithalongbreath,asifhehadbeenunderwater:\"NowI\'mallright,thankyou。Icouldn\'thelpit­theshockofbeingwakedsuddenlytofindthedearoldfellowinsuchapitifulstateupsetme。Ioughttogo­aretheseready?\" \"Inaminute。TellUncletosendformeifIcanbeofanyuse。Oh,poorAuntClara!Howdoesshebearit?\" \"Almostdistracted。ItookMothertoher,andshewilldoallthatanybodycan。HeavenonlyknowswhatAuntwilldoif­\" \"Andonlyheavencanhelpher,\"addedRoseasArchiestoppedatthewordshecouldnotutter。\"Nowtakethem,andletmeknowoften。\" \"Youbravelittlesoul,Iwill。\"AndArchiewentawaythroughtherainwithhissadburden,wonderinghowRosecouldbesocalmwhenthebelovedPrincemightbedying。 Alongdarkdayfollowed,withnothingtobreakitsmelancholymonotonyexceptthebulletinsthatcamefromhourtohourreportinglittlechangeeitherforbetterorforworse。RosebrokethenewsgentlytoAuntPlentyandsetherselftothetaskofkeepinguptheoldlady\'sspirits,for,beinghelpless,thegoodsoulfeltasifeverythingwouldgowrongwithouther。Atduskshefellasleep,andRosewentdowntoorderlightsandfireintheparlor,withteareadytoserveatanymoment,forshefeltsuresomeofthemenwouldcomeandthatacheerfulgreetingandcreaturecomfortswouldsuitthembetterthantears,darkness,anddesolation。 PresentlyMacarrived,sayingtheinstantheenteredtheroom:\"Morecomfortable,Cousin。\" \"Thankheaven!\"criedRose,unclaspingherhands。Thenseeinghowwornout,wet,andwearyMaclookedashecameintothelight,sheaddedinatonethatwasacordialinitself,\"Poorboy,howtiredyouare!Comehere,andletmemakeyoucomfortable。\" \"Iwasgoinghometofreshenupabit,forImustbebackinanhour。 Mothertookmyplace,soIcouldbespared,andcameoff,asUnclerefusedtostir。\" \"Don\'tgohome,forifAuntyisn\'tthereitwillbeverydismal。StepintoUncle\'sroomandrefresh,thencomebackandI\'llgiveyouyourtea。 Letme,letme!Ican\'thelpinanyotherway,andImustdosomething,thiswaitingissodreadful。\" Herlastwordsbetrayedhowmuchsuspensewastryingher,andMacyieldedatonce,gladtocomfortandbecomforted。Whenhecameback,lookingmuchrevived,atemptinglittleteatablestoodbeforethefireandRosewenttomeethim,sayingwithafaintsmile,assheliberallybedewedhimwiththecontentsofacologneflask:\"Ican\'tbearthesmellofether­itsuggestssuchdreadfulthings。\" \"Whatcuriouscreatureswomenare!Archietoldusyouborethenewslikeahero,andnowyouturnpaleatawhiffofbadair。Ican\'texplainit,\"musedMacashemeeklyenduredthefragrantshowerbath。 \"NeithercanI,butI\'vebeenimagininghorrorsalldayandmademyselfnervous。Don\'tletustalkaboutit,butcomeandhavesometea。\" \"That\'sanotherqueerthing。Teaisyourpanaceaforallhumanills­yetthereisn\'tanynourishmentinit。I\'dratherhaveaglassofmilk,thankyou,\"saidMac,takinganeasychairandstretchinghisfeettothefire。 Shebroughtittohimandmadehimeatsomething;then,asheshuthiseyeswearily,shewentawaytothepianoand,havingnohearttosing,playedsoftlytillheseemedasleep。Butatthestrokeofsixhewasupandreadytobeoffagain。 \"Hegavemethat。Takeitwithyouandputsomeonhishair。Helikesit,andIdosowanttohelpalittle,\"shesaid,slippingtheprettyflagonintohispocketwithsuchawistfullookMacneverthoughtofsmilingatthisveryfemininerequest。 \"I\'lltellhim。IsthereanythingelseIcandoforyou,Cousin?\"heasked,holdingthecoldhandthathadbeenservinghimsohelpfully。 \"Onlythis­ifthereisanysuddenchange,promisetosendforme,nomatteratwhathouritis。Imustsay\'good—bye\'\"。 \"Iwillcomeforyou。But,Rose,Iamsureyoumaysleepinpeacetonight,andIhopetohavegoodnewsforyouinthemorning。\" \"Blessyouforthat!Comeearly,andletmeseehimsoon。Iwillbeverygood,andIknowitwillnotdohimanyharm。\" \"Nofearofthat。Thefirstthinghesaidwhenhecouldspeakwas\'TellRosecarefully,\'andasIcameawayheguessedwhereIwasgoingandtriedtokisshishandintheoldway,youknow。\" MacthoughtitwouldcheerhertohearthatCharlierememberedher,butthesuddenthoughtthatshemightneverseethefamiliarlittlegestureanymorewasthelastdropthatmadeherfullheartoverflow,andMacsawthe\"hero\"ofthemorningsinkdownathisfeetinapassionoftearsthatfrightenedhim。Hetookhertothesofaandtriedtocomforther,butassoonasthebittersobbingquietedshelookedupandsaidquitesteadily,greatdropsrollingdownhercheeksthewhile:\"Letmecry­itiswhatIneed,andIshallbeallthebetterforitbyandby。GotoCharlienowandtellhimIsaidwithallmyheart,\'Goodnight!\'\" \"Iwill!\"AndMactrudgedaway,marvelinginhisturnatthecuriouslyblendedstrengthandweaknessofwomankind。 ThatwasthelongestnightRoseeverspent,butjoycameinthemorningwiththeearlymessage:\"Heisbetter。Youaretocomebyandby。\"ThenAuntPlentyforgotherlumbagoandarose;AuntMyra,whohadcometohaveasocialcroak,tookoffherblackbonnetasifitwouldnotbeneededatpresent,andthegirlmadereadytogoandsay\"Welcomeback,\"notthehard\"Good—bye。\" Itseemedverylongtowait,fornosummonscametillafternoon,thenherunclearrived,andatthefirstsightofhisfaceRosebegantotremble。 \"Icameformylittlegirlmyself,becausewemustgobackatonce,\" hesaidasshehurriedtowardhimhatinhand。 \"I\'mready,sir。\"Butherhandsshookasshetriedtotietheribbons,andhereyesneverleftthefacethatwasfulloftenderpityforher。 Hetookherquicklyintothecarriageand,astheyrolledaway,saidwiththequietdirectnesswhichsoothessuchagitationbetterthananysympatheticdemonstration:\"Charlieisworse。Ifeareditwhenthepainwentsosuddenlythismorning,butthechiefinjuriesareinternalandonecannevertellwhatthechancesare。Heinsiststhatheisbetter,buthewillsoonbegintofail,Ifear,becomeunconscious,andslipawaywithoutmoresuffering。Thisisthetimeforyoutoseehim,forhehassethisheartonit,andnothingcanhurthimnow。Mychild,itisveryhard,butwemusthelpeachotherbearit。\" Rosetriedtosay,\"Yes,Uncle\"bravely,butthewordswouldnotcome,andshecouldonlyslipherhandintohiswithalookofmutesubmission。 Helaidherheadonhisshoulderandwentontalkingsoquietlythatanyonewhodidnotseehowwornandhaggardhisfacehadgrownwithtwodaysandanightofsharpanxietymighthavethoughthimcold。 \"Jessiehasgonehometorest,andJaneiswithpoorClara,whohasdroppedasleepatlast。I\'vesentforSteveandtheotherboys。Therewillbetimeforthemlater,buthesobeggedtoseeyounow,Ithoughtitbesttocomewhilethistemporarystrengthkeepshimup。Ihavetoldhimhowitis,buthewillnotbelieveme。Ifheasksyou,answerhonestlyandtrytofithimalittleforthissuddenendingofsomanyhopes。\" \"Howsoon,Uncle?\" \"Afewhours,probably。Thistranquilmomentisyours­makethemostofitand,whenwecandonomoreforhim,we\'llcomfortoneanother。\" Macmettheminthehall,butRosehardlysawhim。Shewasconsciousonlyofthetaskbeforeherand,whenheruncleledhertothedoor,shesaidquietly,\"Letmegoinalone,please。\" Archie,whohadbeenhangingoverthebed,slippedawayintotheinnerroomassheappeared,andRosefoundCharliewaitingforherwithsuchahappyface,shecouldnotbelievewhatshehadheardandfounditeasytosayalmostcheerfullyasshetookhiseagerhandinbothofhers:\"DearCharlie,I\'msogladyousentforme。Ilongedtocome,butwaitedtillyouwerebetter。Yousurelyare?\"sheadded,asasecondglanceshowedtohertheindescribablechangewhichhadcomeuponthefacewhichatfirstseemedtohavebothlightandcolorinit。 \"Unclesaysnot,butIthinkheismistaken,becausetheagonyisallgone,andexceptforthisoddsinkingnowandthen,Idon\'tfeelsomuchamiss,\"heansweredfeeblybutwithsomethingoftheoldlightnessinhisvoice。 \"YouwillhardlybeabletosailintheRajah,Ifear,butyouwon\'tmindwaitingalittlewhilewenurseyou,\"saidpoorRose,tryingtotalkonquietly,withherheartgrowingheaviereveryminute。 \"IshallgoifI\'mcarried!I\'llkeepthatpromise,thoughitcostsmemylife。Oh,Rose!Youknow?They\'vetoldyou?\"And,withasuddenmemoryofwhatbroughthimthere,hehidhisfaceinthepillow。 \"Youbrokenopromise,forIwouldnotletyoumakeone,youremember。 Forgetallthat,andletustalkaboutthebettertimethatmaybecomingforyou。\" \"Alwayssogenerous,sokind!\"hemurmured,withherhandagainsthisfeverishcheek;then,lookingup,hewentoninatonesohumblycontriteitmadehereyesfillwithslow,hottears。 \"Itriedtofleetemptation­Itriedtosay\'no,\'butIamsopitiablyweak,Icouldn\'t。Youmustdespiseme。Butdon\'tgivemeupentirely,forifIlive,I\'lldobetter。I\'llgoawaytoFatherandbeginagain。\" Rosetriedtokeepbackthebitterdrops,buttheywouldfall,tohearhimstillspeakhopefullywhentherewasnohope。Somethinginthemuteanguishofherfaceseemedtotellhimwhatshecouldnotspeak,andaquickchangecameoverhimashegraspedherhandtighter,sayinginasharpwhisper:\"HaveIreallygottodie,Rose?\" Heronlyanswerwastokneeldownandputherarmsabouthim,asifshetriedtokeepdeathawayalittlelonger。Hebelieveditthen,andlaysostill,shelookedupinamoment,fearingsheknewnotwhat。 ButCharlieboreitmanfully,forhehadthecouragewhichcanfaceagreatdangerbravely,thoughnotthestrengthtofightabosomsinandconquerit。Hiseyeswerefixed,asiftryingtolookintotheunseenworldwhitherhewasgoing,andhislipsfirmlysetthatnowordofcomplaintshouldspoiltheproofhemeanttogivethat,thoughhehadnotknownhowtolive,hedidknowhowtodie。ItseemedtoRoseasifforonebriefinstantshesawthemanthatmighthavebeenifearlytraininghadtaughthimhowtorulehimself;andthefirstwordsheutteredwithalongsigh,ashiseyecamebacktoher,showedthathefeltthefailureandowneditwithpatheticcandor。 \"Betterso,perhaps;bettergobeforeIbringanymoresorrowtoyouandshametomyself。I\'dliketostayalittlelongerandtrytoredeemthepast;itseemssowastednow,butifIcan\'t,don\'tgrieve,Rose。I\'mnolosstoanyone,andperhapsitistoolatetomend。\" \"Oh,don\'tsaythat!Noonewillfindyourplaceamongus­wenevercanforgethowmuchwelovedyou,andyoumustbelievehowfreelyweforgiveaswewouldbeforgiven,\"criedRose,steadiedbythepaledespairthathadfallenonCharlie\'sfacewiththosebitterwords。 \"\'Forgiveusourtrespasses!\'Yes,Ishouldsaythat。Rose,I\'mnotready,itissosudden。WhatcanIdo?\"hewhispered,clingingtoherasifhehadnoanchorexceptthecreaturewhomhelovedsomuch。 \"Unclewilltellyou­Iamnotgoodenough­Icanonlyprayforyou。\"Andshemovedasiftocallinthehelpsosorelyneeded。 \"No,no,notyet!Staybyme,darling­readsomethingthere,inGrandfather\'soldbook,someprayerforsuchasI。Itwilldomemoregoodfromyouthananyministeralive。\" Shegotthevenerablebook­giventoCharliebecauseheborethegoodman\'sname­and,turningtothe\"PrayerfortheDying,\"readitbrokenlywhilethevoicebesideherechoednowandthensomewordthatreprovedorcomforted。 \"Thetestimonyofagoodconscience。\"\"Bythesadnessofhiscountenancemayhisheartbemadebetter。\"\"Christianpatienceandfortitude。\"\"Leavetheworldinpeace。\"\"Amen。\" Therewassilenceforalittle;thenRose,seeinghowwanhelooked,saidsoftly,\"ShallIcallUnclenow?\" \"Ifyouwill。Butfirst­don\'tsmileatmyfoolishness,dear­I wantmylittleheart。Theytookitoff­pleasegiveitbackandletmekeepitalways,\"heansweredwiththeoldfondnessstrongasever,evenwhenhecouldshowitonlybyholdingfastthechildishtrinketwhichshefoundandhadgivenhim­theoldagateheartwiththefadedribbon。 \"Putiton,andneverletthemtakeitoff,\"hesaid,andwhensheaskediftherewasanythingelseshecoulddoforhim,hetriedtostretchouthisarmstoherwithalookwhichaskedformore。 Shekissedhimverytenderlyonlipsandforehead,triedtosay\"good—bye,\" butcouldnotspeak,andgropedherwaytothedoor。Turningforalastlook,Charlie\'shopefulspiritroseforamoment,asifanxioustosendherawaymorecheerful,andhesaidwithashadowoftheoldblithesmile,afeebleattemptatthefamiliarfarewellgesture:\"Tilltomorrow,Rose。\" AlasforCharlie!Histomorrownevercame,andwhenshesawhimnext,helaytherelookingsosereneandnoble,itseemedasifitmustbewellwithhim,forallthepainwaspast;temptationended;doubtandfear,hopeandlove,couldnomorestirhisquietheart,andinsolemntruthhehadgonetomeethisFather,andbeginagain。Chapter16。Chapter16。16GOODWORKSTheRajahwasdelayedawhile,andwhenitsailedpoorMrs。Clarawasonboard,foreverythingwasready。Allthoughtshehadbettergotocomfortherhusband,andsinceherboydiedsheseemedtocareverylittlewhatbecameofher。So,withfriendstocheerthelongvoyage,shesailedaway,aheavyheartedwoman,yetnotquitedisconsolate,forsheknewhermourningwasexcessivelybecomingandfeltsurethatStephenwouldnotfindheralteredbyhertrialsasmuchasmighthavebeenexpected。 Thennothingwasleftofthatgayhouseholdbuttheemptyrooms,silenceneverbrokenbyablithevoiceanymore,andpicturesfullofpromise,butallunfinished,likepoorCharlie\'slife。 TherewasmuchmourningforthebonnyPrince,butnoneedtotellofitexceptasitaffectedRose,foritiswithherwehavemosttodo,theothercharactersbeingofsecondaryimportance。 Whentimehadsoothedthefirstshockofsuddenloss,shewassurprisedtofindthememoryofhisfaultsandfailings,shortlifeandpiteousdeath,grewdim,asifakindlyhandhadwipedouttherecordandgivenhimbacktoherinthelikenessofthebrave,brightboyshehadloved,notasthewayward,passionateyoungmanwhohadlovedher。 Thiscomfortedherverymuch,andfoldingdownthelastblottedleafwherehisnamewaswritten,shegladlyturnedbacktoreopenandrereadthehappierchapterswhichpaintedtheyouthfulknightbeforehewentouttofallinhisfirstbattle。NoneofthebitternessoflovebereavedmarredthismemoryforRose,becauseshefoundthatthewarmersentiment,justbuddinginherheart,haddiedwithCharlieandlaycoldandquietinhisgrave。Shewondered,yetwasglad,thoughsometimesaremorsefulpangsmoteherwhenshediscoveredhowpossibleitwastogoonwithouthim,feelingalmostasifaburdenhadbeenliftedoff,sincehishappinesswastakenoutofherhands。Thetimehadnotyetcomewhentheknowledgethataman\'sheartwasinherkeepingwouldmaketheprideandjoyofherlife,andwhileshewaitedforthatmomentsheenjoyedthelibertysheseemedtohaverecovered。 Suchbeingherinwardstate,itmuchannoyedhertoberegardedasabrokenheartedgirlandpitiedforthelossofheryounglover。Shecouldnotexplaintoalltheworld,soletitpass,andoccupiedhermindwiththegoodworkswhichalwaysliereadytobetakenupandcarriedon。Havingchosenphilanthropyasherprofession,shefeltthatitwashightimetobeginthetasktoolongneglected。 Herprojectswereexcellent,butdidnotprosperasrapidlyasshehoped,for,havingtodealwithpeople,notthings,unexpectedobstacleswereconstantlyarising。The\"HomeforDecayedGentlewomen,\"astheboysinsistedoncallinghertwonewlyrepairedhouses,startedfinelyanditwasapleasantsighttoseethecomfortableroomsfilledwithrespectablewomenbusyattheirvarioustasks,surroundedbythedecenciesandmanyofthecomfortswhichmakelifeendurable。But,presently,Rosewasdisturbedtofindthatthegoodpeopleexpectedhertotakecareoftheminawayshehadnotbargainedfor。Buffum,heragent,wasconstantlyreportingcomplaints,newwants,andgeneraldiscontentiftheywerenotattendedto。Thingswereveryneglected,waterpipesfrozeandburst,drainsgotoutoforder,yardswereinamess,andrentsbehind—hand。Worstofall,outsiders,insteadofsympathizing,onlylaughedandsaid,\"Wetoldyouso,\"whichisamostdiscouragingremarktoolderandwiserworkersthanRose。 UncleAlec,however,stoodbyherstaunchlyandhelpedheroutofmanyofherwoesbygoodadviceandanoccasionalvisitofinspection,whichdidmuchtoimpressuponthedwellerstherethefactthat,iftheydidnotdotheirpart,theirleaseswouldbeshortones。 \"Ididn\'texpecttomakeanythingoutofit,butIdidthinktheywouldbegrateful,\"saidRoseononeoccasionwhenseveralcomplaintshadcomeinatonceandBuffumhadreportedgreatdifficultyincollectingthelowrents。 \"Ifyoudothisthingforthesakeofthegratitude,thenitisafailure­butifitisdonefortheloveofhelpingthosewhoneedhelp,itisasuccess,forinspiteoftheirworryeveryoneofthesewomenfeelwhatprivilegestheyenjoyandvaluethemhighly,\"saidDr。Alecastheywenthomeafteroneoftheseunsatisfactorycalls。 \"Thentheleasttheycandoistosay\'thankyou。\'I\'mafraidIhavethoughtmoreofthegratitudethanthework,butifthereisn\'tany,I mustmakeupmymindtogowithout,\"answeredRose,feelingdefraudedofherdue。 \"Favorsoftenseparateinsteadofattractingpeoplenearertooneanother,andI\'veseenmanyafriendshipspoiltbytheobligationbeingallononeside。Can\'texplainit,butitisso,andI\'vecometotheconclusionthatitisashardtogiveintherightspiritasitistoreceive。Puzzleitout,mydear,whileyouarelearningtodogoodforitsownsake。\"