\"Idon’tthinkyoucare,\"shewentonwithasortofdesperatehaste,\"whetheryouhurtpeopleornot。Youhavebeenhereallthistimewithoutevengoingtoseeyourfatherandmother。\"
\"Doyouthinktheywouldwanttoseeme?\"
Christianlookedup。
\"It’sallbeensosoftforyou,\"hesaidbitterly;\"youdon’tunderstand。\"
Heturnedhisheadaway,andthenburstout:\"I’mproudtocomestraightfromthesoil——Iwouldn’thaveitotherwise;buttheyareof’thepeople,’everythingisnarrowwiththem——theyonlyunderstandwhattheycanseeandtouch。\"
\"I’msorryIspokelikethat,\"saidChristiansoftly;\"you’venevertoldmeaboutyourself。\"
Therewassomethingjustalittlecruelinthewaythepainterlookedather,thenseemingtofeelcompunction,hesaidquickly:\"Ialwayshated——thepeasantlife——Iwantedtogetawayintotheworld;Ihadafeelinginhere——Iwanted——Idon’tknowwhatIwanted!Ididrunawayatlasttoahouse—painteratMeran。Thepriestwrotemealetterfrommyfather——theythrewmeoff;that’sall。\"
Christian’seyeswereverybright,herlipsmoved,likethelipsofachildlisteningtoastory。
\"Goon,\"shesaid。
\"IstayedatMerantwoyears,tillI’dlearntallIcouldthere,thenabrotherofmymother’shelpedmetogettoVienna;Iwasluckyenoughtofindworkwithamanwhousedtodecoratechurches。Wewentaboutthecountrytogether。OncewhenhewasillIpaintedtheroofofachurchentirelybymyself;Ilayonmybackonthescaffoldboardsalldayforaweek——Iwasproudofthatroof。\"Hepaused。
\"Whendidyoubeginpaintingpictures?\"
\"AfriendaskedmewhyIdidn’ttryfortheAcademie。Thatstartedmegoingtothenightschools;Iworkedeveryminute——Ihadtogetmylivingaswell,ofcourse,soIworkedatnight。
Thenwhentheexaminationcame,IthoughtIcoulddonothing——itwasjustasifIhadneverhadabrushorpencilinmyhand。Buttheseconddayaprofessorinpassingmesaid,’Good!Quitegood!’Thatgavemecourage。IwassureIhadfailedthough;butIwassecondoutofsixty。\"
Christiannodded。
\"ToworkintheschoolsafterthatIhadtogiveupmybusiness,ofcourse。Therewasonlyoneteacherwhoevertaughtmeanything;theothersallseemedfools。Thismanwouldcomeandruboutwhatyou’ddonewithhissleeve。Iusedtocrywithrage——butItoldhimI
couldonlylearnfromhim,andhewassoastonishedthathegotmeintohisclass。\"
\"Buthowdidyoulivewithoutmoney?\"askedChristian。
Hisfaceburnedwithadarkflush。\"Idon’tknowhowIlived;youmusthavebeenthroughthesethingstoknow,youwouldneverunderstand。\"
\"ButIwanttounderstand,please。\"
\"Whatdoyouwantmetotellyou?HowIwenttwiceaweektoeatfreedinners!HowItookcharity!HowIwashungry!Therewasarichcousinofmymother’s——Iusedtogotohim。Ididn’tlikeit。
Butifyou’restarvinginthewinter\"
Christianputoutherhand。
\"Iusedtoborrowapronsfulofcoalsfromotherstudentswhowereaspoor——butIneverwenttotherichstudents。\"
Theflushhaddiedoutofhisface。
\"Thatsortofthingmakesyouhatetheworld!Youworktillyoustagger;you’recoldandhungry;youseerichpeopleintheircarriages,wrappedinfurs,andallthetimeyouwanttodosomethinggreat。Youprayforachance,anychance;nothingcomestothepoor!
Itmakesyouhatetheworld。\"
Christian’seyesfilledwithtears。Hewenton:
\"ButIwasn’ttheonlyoneinthatcondition;weusedtomeet。
Garin,aRussianwithabrownbeardandpatchesofcheekshowingthrough,andyellowteeth,whoalwayslookedhungry。Paunitz,whocamefromsympathy!Hehadfatcheeksandlittleeyes,andabiggoldchain——theswine!AndlittleMisek。Itwasinhisroomwemet,withthepaperpeelingoffthewalls,andtwodoorswithcracksinthem,sothattherewasalwaysadraught。Weusedtositonhisbed,andpullthedirtyblanketsoverusforwarmth;andsmoke——tobaccowasthelastthingweeverwentwithout。OverthebedwasaVirginandChild——MisekwasaverydevoutCatholic;butonedaywhenhehadhadnodinnerandadealerhadkepthispicturewithoutpayinghim,hetooktheimageandthrewitonthefloorbeforeoureyes;itbroke,andhetrampledonthebits。Lendorfwasanother,aheavyfellowwhowasalwayspuffingouthiswhitecheeksandsmitinghimself,andsaying:’Cursedsociety!’AndSchonborn,anaristocratwhohadquarrelledwithhisfamily。Hewasthepoorestofusall;
butonlyheandIwouldeverhavedaredtodoanything——theyallknewthat!\"
Christianlistenedwithawe。\"Doyoumean?\"shesaid,\"doyoumean,thatyou——?\"
\"Yousee!you’reafraidofmeatonce。It’simpossibleevenforyoutounderstand。Itonlymakesyouafraid。Ahungrymanlivingoncharity,sickwithrageandshame,isawolfeventoyou!\"
Christianlookedstraightintohiseyes。
\"That’snottrue。IfIcan’tunderstand,Icanfeel。Wouldyoubethesamenowifitweretocomeagain?\"
\"Yes,itdrivesmemadevennowtothinkofpeoplefattedwithprosperity,sneeringandholdinguptheirhandsatpoordevilswhohavesufferedtentimesmorethanthemostthosesoftanimalscouldbear。I’molder;I’velived——Iknowthingscan’tbeputrightbyviolence——nothingwillputthingsright,butthatdoesn’tstopmyfeeling。\"
\"Didyoudoanything?Youmusttellmeallnow。\"
\"Wetalked——wewerealwaystalking。\"
\"No,tellmeeverything!\"
Unconsciouslysheclaimed,andheseemedunconsciouslytoadmitherrighttothisknowledge。
\"There’snotmuchtotell。Onedaywebegantalkinginlowvoices——
Garinbeganit;hehadbeeninsomeaffairinRussia。Wetookanoath;afterthatweneverraisedourvoices。Wehadaplan。Itwasallnewtome,andIhatedthewholething——butIwasalwayshungry,orsickfromtakingcharity,andIwouldhavedoneanything。Theyknewthat;theyusedtolookatmeandSchonborn;weknewthatnooneelsehadanycourage。HeandIweregreatfriends,butwenevertalkedofthat;wetriedtokeepourmindsawayfromthethoughtofit。Ifwehadagooddayandwerenotsohungry,itseemedunnatural;butwhenthedayhadnotbeengood——thenitseemednaturalenough。Iwasn’tafraid,butIusedtowakeupinthenight;Ihatedtheoathwehadtaken,Ihatedeveryoneofthosefellows;thethingwasnotwhatIwasmadefor,itwasn’tmywork,itwasn’tmynature,itwasforcedonme——Ihatedit,butsometimesIwaslikeamadman。\"
\"Yes,yes,\"shemurmured。
\"AllthistimeIwasworkingattheAcademie,andlearningallI
could……Oneeveningthatwemet,Paunitzwasnotthere。Misekwastellingushowthethinghadbeenarranged。SchonbornandIlookedateachother——itwaswarm——perhapswewerenothungry——itwasspringtime,too,andintheSpringit’sdifferent。Thereissomething。\"
Christiannodded。
\"Whileweweretalkingtherecameaknockatthedoor。Lendorfputhiseyetothekeyhole,andmadeasign。Thepolicewerethere。
Nobodysaidanything,butMisekcrawledunderthebed;weallfollowed;andtheknockinggrewlouderandlouder。Inthewallatthebackofthebedwasalittledoorintoanemptycellar。Wecreptthrough。Therewasatrap—doorbehindsomecases,wheretheyusedtorollbarrelsin。Wecrawledthroughthatintothebackstreet。Wewentdifferentways。\"
Hepaused,andChristiangasped。
\"IthoughtIwouldgetmymoney,buttherewasapolicemanbeforemydoor。Theyhadusfinely。ItwasPaunitz;ifImethimevennowI
shouldwringhisneck。IsworeIwouldn’tbecaught,butIhadnoideawheretogo。ThenIthoughtofalittleItalianbarberwhousedtoshavemewhenIhadmoneyforashave;Iknewhewouldhelp。HebelongedtosomeItalianSociety;heoftentalkedtome,underhisbreath,ofcourse。Iwenttohim。Hewasshavinghimselfbeforegoingtoaball。Itoldhimwhathadhappened;itwasfunnytoseehimputhisbackagainstthedoor。Hewasveryfrightened,understandingthissortofthingbetterthanIdid——forIwasonlytwentythen。Heshavedmyheadandmoustacheandputmeonafairwig。Thenhebroughtmemacaroni,andsomemeat,toeat。Hegavemeabigfairmoustache,andacap,andhidthemoustacheinthelining。
Hebroughtmeacloakofhisown,andfourgulden。Allthetimehewasextremelyfrightened,andkeptlistening,andsaying:’Eat!’
\"WhenIhaddone,hejustsaid:’Goaway,Irefusetoknowanythingmoreofyou。’
\"Ithankedhimandwentout。Iwalkedaboutallthatnight;forI
couldn’tthinkofanythingtodooranywheretogo。InthemorningI
sleptonaseatinoneofthesquares。ThenIthoughtIwouldgototheGallerien;andIspentthewholedaylookingatthepictures。
WhentheGallerieswereshutIwasverytired,soIwentintoacafe,andhadsomebeer。WhenIcameoutIsatonthesameseatintheSquare。Imeanttowaittilldarkandthenwalkoutofthecityandtakethetrainatsomelittlestation,butwhileIwassittingthereIwenttosleep。Apolicemanwokeme。Hehadmywiginhishand。
\"’Whydoyouwearawig?’hesaid。
\"Ianswered:’BecauseIambald。’
\"’No,’hesaid,’you’renotbald,you’vebeenshaved。Icanfeelthehaircoming。’
\"Heputhisfingeronmyhead。Ifeltrecklessandlaughed。
\"’Ah!’hesaid,’you’llcomewithmeandexplainallthis;yournoseandeyesarelookedfor。’
\"Iwentwithhimquietlytothepolice—station……\"
Harzseemedcarriedawaybyhisstory。Hisquickdarkfaceworked,hissteel—greyeyesstaredasthoughhewereagainpassingthroughalltheselong—pastemotions。
Thehotsunstruckdown;Christiandrewherselftogether,sittingwithherhandsclaspedroundherknees。
X
\"Ididn’tcarebythenwhatcameofit。Ididn’teventhinkwhatI
wasgoingtosay。Heledmedownapassagetoaroomwithbarsacrossthewindowsandlongseats,andmapsonthewalls。Wesatandwaited。Hekepthiseyeonmeallthetime;andIsawnohope。
PresentlytheInspectorcame。’Bringhiminhere,’hesaid;I
rememberfeelingIcouldkillhimfororderingmeabout!Wewentintothenextroom。Ithadalargeclock,awriting—table,andawindow,withoutbars,lookingonacourtyard。Longpolicemen’scoatsandcapswerehangingfromsomepegs。TheInspectortoldmetotakeoffmycap。Itookitoff,wigandall。HeaskedmewhoIwas,butIrefusedtoanswer。Justthentherewasaloudsoundofvoicesintheroomwehadcomefrom。TheInspectortoldthepolicemantolookafterme,andwenttoseewhatitwas。Icouldhearhimtalking。Hecalledout:’Comehere,Becker!’Istoodveryquiet,andBeckerwenttowardsthedoor。IheardtheInspectorsay:’GoandfindSchwartz,Iwillseeafterthisfellow。’Thepolicemanwent,andtheInspectorstoodwithhisbacktomeinthehalf—opendoor,andbeganagaintotalktothemanintheotherroom。Onceortwicehelookedroundatme,butIstoodquietallthetime。Theybegantodisagree,andtheirvoicesgotangry。TheInspectormovedalittleintotheotherroom。’Now!’Ithought,andslippedoffmycloak。Ihookedoffapoliceman’scoatandcap,andputthemon。MyheartbeattillIfeltsick。Iwentontiptoetothewindow。Therewasnooneoutside,butattheentranceamanwasholdingsomehorses。Iopenedthewindowalittleandheldmybreath。IheardtheInspectorsay:’Iwillreportyouforimpertinence!’andslippedthroughthewindow。Thecoatcamedownnearlytomyheels,andthecapovermyeyes。Iwalkeduptothemanwiththehorses,andsaid:’Good—evening。’Oneofthehorseshadbeguntokick,andheonlygruntedatme。Igotintoapassingtram;itwasfiveminutestotheWestBahnhof;Igotoutthere。
Therewasatrainstarting;theywereshouting’Einsteigen!’Iran。
Thecollectortriedtostopme。Ishouted:’Business——important!’
Heletmeby。Ijumpedintoacarriage。Thetrainstarted。\"
Hepaused,andChristianheavedasigh。
Harzwenton,twistingatwigofivyinhishands:\"Therewasanothermaninthecarriagereadingapaper。PresentlyIsaidtohim,’Wheredowestopfirst?’’St。Polten。’ThenIknewitwastheMunichexpress——St。Polten,Amstetten,Linz,andSalzburg——fourstopsbeforethefrontier。Themanputdownhispaperandlookedatme;hehadabigfairmoustacheandrathershabbyclothes。Hislookingatmedisturbedme,forIthoughteveryminutehewouldsay:’You’renopoliceman!’Andsuddenlyitcameintomymindthatiftheylookedformeinthistrain,itwouldbeasapoliceman!——theywouldknow,ofcourse,atthestationthatapolicemanhadrunpastatthelastminute。Iwantedtogetridofthecoatandcap,butthemanwasthere,andIdidn’tliketomoveoutofthecarriageforotherpeopletonotice。SoIsaton。WecametoSt。Poltenatlast。Themaninmycarriagetookhisbag,gotout,andlefthispaperontheseat。
Westartedagain;Ibreathedatlast,andassoonasIcouldtookthecapandcoatandthrewthemoutintothedarkness。Ithought:’I
shallgetacrossthefrontiernow。’ItookmyowncapoutandfoundthemoustacheLuigigaveme;rubbedmyclothesascleanaspossible;
stuckonthemoustache,andwithsomelittleendsofchalkinmypocketmademyeyebrowslight;thendrewsomelinesinmyfacetomakeitolder,andpulledmycapwelldownabovemywig。Ididitprettywell——Iwasquitelikethemanwhohadgotout。Isatinhiscorner,tookuphisnewspaper,andwaitedforAmstetten。Itseemedatremendoustimebeforewegotthere。FrombehindmypaperIcouldseefiveorsixpolicemenontheplatform,onequiteclose。Heopenedthedoor,lookedatme,andwalkedthroughthecarriageintothecorridor。Itooksometobaccoandrolledupacigarette,butitshook,\"Harzliftedtheivytwig,\"likethis。Inaminutetheconductorandtwomorepolicemencame。’Hewashere,’saidtheconductor,’withthisgentleman。’Oneofthemlookedatme,andasked:’Haveyouseenapolicemantravellingonthistrain?’’Yes,’
Isaid。’Where?’’HegotoutatSt。Polten。’Thepolicemanaskedtheconductor:’Didyouseehimgetoutthere?’Theconductorshookhishead。Isaid:’Hegotoutasthetrainwasmoving。’’Ah!’saidthepoliceman,’whatwashelike?’’Rathershort,andnomoustache。
Why?’’Didyounoticeanythingunusual?’’No,’Isaid,’onlythatheworecolouredtrousers。What’sthematter?’Onepolicemansaidtotheother:’That’sourman!SendatelegramtoSt。Polten;hehasmorethananhour’sstart。’HeaskedmewhereIwasgoing。Itoldhim:’Linz。’’Ah!’hesaid,’you’llhavetogiveevidence;yournameandaddressplease?’’JosefReinhardt,17DonauStrasse。’Hewroteitdown。Theconductorsaid:’Wearelate,canwestart?’Theyshutthedoor。Iheardthemsaytotheconductor:’SearchagainatLinz,andreporttotheInspectorthere。’Theyhurriedontotheplatform,andwestarted。AtfirstIthoughtIwouldgetoutassoonasthetrainhadleftthestation。Then,thatIshouldbetoofarfromthefrontier;bettertogoontoLinzandtakemychancethere。Isatstillandtriednottothink。
Afteralongtime,webegantorunmoreslowly。Iputmyheadoutandcouldseeinthedistancearingoflightshangingintheblackness。Iloosenedthecarriagedoorandwaitedforthetraintorunslowerstill;Ididn’tmeantogointoLinzlikearatintoatrap。AtlastIcouldwaitnolonger;Iopenedthedoor,jumpedandfellintosomebushes。Iwasnotmuchhurt,butbruised,andthebreathknockedoutofme。AssoonasIcould,Icrawledout。Itwasverydark。Ifeltheavyandsore,andforsometimewentstumblinginandoutamongsttrees。PresentlyIcametoaclearspace;ononesideIcouldseethetown’sshapedrawninlightedlamps,andontheotheradarkmass,whichIthinkwasforest;inthedistancetoowasathinchainoflights。Ithought:’Theymustbethelightsofabridge。’Justthenthemooncameout,andIcouldseetherivershiningbelow。Itwascoldanddamp,andIwalkedquickly。AtlastIcameoutonaroad,pasthousesandbarkingdogs,downtotheriverbank;thereIsatagainstashedandwenttosleep。Iwokeverystiff。Itwasdarkerthanbefore;themoonwasgone。Icouldjustseetheriver。Istumbledon,togetthroughthetownbeforedawn。
Itwasallblackshapes—housesandsheds,andthesmelloftheriver,thesmellofrottinghay,apples,tar,mud,fish;andhereandthereonawharfalantern。Istumbledovercasksandropesandboxes;I
sawIshouldnevergetclear——thedawnhadbegunalreadyontheotherside。Somemencamefromahousebehindme。Ibent,andcreptbehindsomebarrels。Theypassedalongthewharf;theyseemedtodropintotheriver。Iheardoneofthemsay:’Passaubeforenight。’
Istoodupandsawtheyhadwalkedonboardasteamerwhichwaslyingheadup—stream,withsomebargesintow。Therewasaplanklaidtothesteamer,andalanternattheotherend。Icouldhearthefellowsmovingbelowdeck,gettingupsteam。Iranacrosstheplankandcrepttotheendofthesteamer。ImeanttogowiththemtoPassau!Theropewhichtowedthebargeswasnearlytaut;andIknewifIcouldgetontothebargesIshouldbesafe。Iclimbeddownonthisropeandcrawledalong。Iwasdesperate,Iknewthey’dsoonbecomingup,anditwasgettinglight。IthoughtIshouldfallintothewaterseveraltimes,butIgottothebargeatlast。Itwasladenwithstraw。Therewasnobodyonboard。Iwashungryandthirsty——Ilookedforsomethingtoeat;therewasnothingbuttheashesofafireandaman’scoat。Icreptintothestraw。Soonaboatbroughtmen,oneforeachbarge,andthereweresoundsofsteam。
Assoonaswebeganmovingthroughthewater,Ifellasleep。WhenI
wokewewerecreepingthroughaheavymist。Imadealittleholeinthestrawandsawthebargeman。Hewassittingbyafireatthebarge’sedge,sothatthesparksandsmokeblewawayoverthewater。
Heateanddrankwithbothhands,andfunnyenoughhelookedinthemist,likeabigbirdflappingitswings;therewasagoodsmellofcoffee,andIsneezed。Howthefellowstarted!Butpresentlyhetookapitchforkandproddedthestraw。ThenIstoodup。Icouldn’thelplaughing,hewassosurprised——ahuge,darkman,withagreatblackbeard。Ipointedtothefireandsaid’Givemesome,brother!’
Hepulledmeoutofthestraw;Iwassostiff,Icouldn’tmove。I
satbythefire,andateblackbreadandturnips,anddrankcoffee;
whilehestoodby,watchingmeandmuttering。Icouldn’tunderstandhimwell——hespokeadialectfromHungary。Heaskedme:HowIgotthere——whoIwas——whereIwasfrom?Ilookedupinhisface,andhelookeddownatme,suckinghispipe。Hewasabigman,helivedaloneontheriver,andIwastiredoftellinglies,soItoldhimthewholething。WhenIhaddonehejustgrunted。Icanseehimnowstandingoverme,withthemisthanginginhisbeard,andhisgreatnakedarms。Hedrewmesomewater,andIwashedandshowedhimmywigandmoustache,andthrewthemoverboard。Allthatdaywelayoutonthebargeinthemist,withourfeettothefire,smoking;nowandthenhewouldspitintotheashesandmutterintohisbeard。Ishallneverforgetthatday。Thesteamerwaslikeamonsterwithfierynostrils,andtheotherbargesweredumbcreatureswitheyes,wherethefireswere;wecouldn’tseethebank,butnowandthenabluffandhightrees,oracastle,showedinthemist。IfIhadonlyhadpaintandcanvasthatday!\"Hesighed。
\"ItwasearlySpring,andtheriverwasinflood;theyweregoingtoRegensburgtounloadthere,takefreshcargo,andbacktoLinz。Assoonasthemistbegantoclear,thebargemanhidmeinthestraw。
AtPassauwasthefrontier;theylaythereforthenight,butnothinghappened,andIsleptinthestraw。ThenextdayIlayoutonthebargedeck;therewasnomist,butIwasfree——thesunshonegoldonthestrawandthegreensacking;thewaterseemedtodance,andI
laughed——Ilaughedallthetime,andthebargemanlaughedwithme。
Afinefellowhewas!AtRegensburgIhelpedthemtounload;formorethanaweekweworked;theynicknamedmebaldhead,andwhenitwasalloverIgavethemoneyIearnedfortheunloadingtothebigbargeman。Wekissedeachotheratparting。IhadstillthreeoftheguldenthatLuigigaveme,andIwenttoahouse—painterandgotworkwithhim。ForsixmonthsIstayedtheretosavemoney;thenIwrotetomymother’scousininVienna,andtoldhimIwasgoingtoLondon。
Hegavemeanintroductiontosomefriendsthere。IwenttoHamburg,andfromtheretoLondoninacargosteamer,andI’veneverbeenbacktillnow。\"
XI
Afteraminute’ssilenceChristiansaidinastartledvoice:\"Theycouldarrestyouthen!\"
Harzlaughed。
\"Iftheyknew;butit’ssevenyearsago。\"
\"Whydidyoucomehere,whenit’ssodangerous?\"
\"Ihadbeenworkingtoohard,Iwantedtoseemycountry——aftersevenyears,andwhenit’sforbidden!ButI’mreadytogobacknow。\"Helookeddownather,frowning。
\"HadyouahardtimeinLondon,too?\"
\"Harder,atfirst——Icouldn’tspeakthelanguage。Inmyprofessionit’shardworktogetrecognised,it’shardworktomakealiving。
Therearetoomanywhoseinterestitistokeepyoudown——Ishan’tforgetthem。\"
\"Buteveryoneisnotlikethat?\"
\"No;therearefinefellows,too。Ishan’tforgetthemeither。I
cansellmypicturesnow;I’mnolongerweak,andIpromiseyouI
shan’tforget。IfinthefutureIhavepower,andIshallhavepower——Ishan’tforget。\"
Ashoweroffinegravelcamerattlingonthewall。Dawneywasstandingbelowthemwithanamusedexpressiononhisupturnedface。
\"Areyougoingtostaythereallnight?\"heasked。\"GretaandIhaveboredeachother。\"
\"We’recoming,\"calledChristianhastily。
Onthewaybackneitherspokeaword,butwhentheyreachedtheVilla,Harztookherhand,andsaid:\"FrauleinChristian,Ican’tdoanymorewithyourpicture。Ishan’ttouchitagainafterthis。\"
Shemadenoanswer,buttheylookedateachother,andbothseemedtoask,toentreat,somethingmore;thenhereyesfell。Hedroppedherhand,andsaying,\"Good—night,\"ranafterDawney。
Inthecorridor,Dominique,carryingadishoffruit,metthesisters;heinformedthemthatMissNaylorhadretiredtobed;thatHerrPaulwouldnotbehometodinner;hismasterwasdininginhisroom;dinnerwouldbeservedforMrs。Decieandthetwoyoungladiesinaquarterofanhour:\"Andthefishisgoodto—night;littletrouts!trythem,Signorina!\"Hemovedonquickly,softly,likeacat,thetailsofhisdress—coatflapping,andtheheelsofhiswhitesocksgleaming。
Christianranupstairs。Sheflewaboutherroom,feelingthatifsheoncestoodstillitwouldallcrystalliseinhardpainfulthought,whichmotionalonekeptaway。Shewashed,changedherdressandshoes,andrandowntoheruncle’sroom。Mr。Treffryhadjustfinisheddinner,pushedthelittletableback,andwassittinginhischair,withhisglassesonhisnose,readingtheTines。Christiantouchedhisforeheadwithherlips。
\"Gladtoseeyou,Chris。Yourstepfather’souttodinner,andI
can’tstandyourauntwhenshe’sinoneofhertalkingmoods——bitofahumbug,Chris,betweenourselves;eh,isn’tshe?\"Hiseyestwinkled。
Christiansmiled。Therewasacurioushappyrestlessnessinherthatwouldnotletherkeepstill。
\"Picturefinished?\"Mr。Treffryaskedsuddenly,takingupthepaperwithacrackle。\"Don’tgoandfallinlovewiththepainter,Chris。\"
Christianwasstillenoughnow。
’Whynot?’shethought。’Whatshouldyouknowabouthim?Isn’thegoodenoughforme?’Agongsounded。
\"There’syourdinner,\"Mr。Treffryremarked。
Withsuddencontritionshebentandkissedhim。
ButwhenshehadlefttheroomMr。TreffryputdowntheTimesandstaredatthedoor,hummingtohimself,andthoughtfullyfingeringhischin。
Christiancouldnoteat;shesat,indifferenttothehoveringsofDominique,tormentedbyuneasyfearandlongings。SheansweredMrs。
Decieatrandom。Gretakeptstealinglooksatherfromunderherlashes。
\"Decidedcharactersarecharming,don’tyouthinkso,Christian?\"
Mrs。Deciesaid,thrustingherchinalittleforward,andmodellingthewords。\"ThatiswhyIlikeMr。Harzsomuch;suchanimmenseadvantageforamantoknowhismind。Youhaveonlytolookatthatyoungmantoseethatheknowswhathewants,andmeanstohaveit。\"
Christianpushedherplateaway。Greta,flushing,saidabruptly:
\"DoctorEdmundisnotadecidedcharacter,Ithink。Thisafternoonhesaid:’ShallIhavesomebeer—yes,Ishall——no,Ishallnot’;thenheorderedthebeer,so,whenitcame,hegaveittothesoldiers。\"
Mrs。Decieturnedherenigmaticsmilefromonegirltotheother。
Whendinnerwasovertheywentintoherroom。Gretastoleatoncetothepiano,whereherlonghairfellalmosttothekeys;silentlyshesattherefingeringthenotes,smilingtoherself,andlookingatheraunt,whowasreadingPater’sessays。Christiantoohadtakenupabook,butsoonputitdown——ofseveralpagesshehadnotunderstoodaword。Shewentintothegardenandwanderedaboutthelawn,claspingherhandsbehindherhead。Theairwasheavy;verydistantthundertrembledamongthemountains,flashesofsummerlightningplayedoverthetrees;andtwogreatmothswerehoveringaboutarosebush。