Hewentupstairstothedisusedcitadel，flunghimselfintothearm-
chair，andcoveredhisfacewithhishands。
Hestilldidnotknowthathiswifedrank，buthecouldnolongertrusther，andhisdreamofhappinesswasover。HehadbeensavedfromtheChurch——soasbyfire，butstillsaved——butwhatcouldnowsavehimfromhismarriage？HehadmadethesamemistakethathehadmadeinweddinghimselftotheChurch，butwithahundredtimesworseresults。Hehadlearntnothingbyexperience：hewasanEsau——oneofthosewretcheswhoseheartstheLordhadhardened，who，havingears，heardnot，havingeyessawnot，andwhoshouldfindnoplaceforrepentancethoughtheysoughtitevenwithtears。
YethadhenotonthewholetriedtofindoutwhatthewaysofGodwere，andtofollowtheminsinglenessofheart？Toacertainextent，yes；buthehadnotbeenthorough；hehadnotgivenupallforGod。Heknewthatverywellhehaddonelittleascomparedwithwhathemightandoughttohavedone，butstillifhewasbeingpunishedforthis，Godwasahardtaskmaster，andone，too，whowascontinuallypouncingoutuponhisunhappycreaturesfromambuscades。
InmarryingEllenhehadmeanttoavoidalifeofsin，andtotakethecoursehebelievedtobemoralandright。Withhisantecedentsandsurroundingsitwasthemostnaturalthingintheworldforhimtohavedone，yetinwhatafrightfulpositionhadnothismoralitylandedhim。Couldanyamountofimmoralityhaveplacedhiminamuchworseone？Whatwasmoralityworthifitwasnotthatwhichonthewholebroughtamanpeaceatthelast，andcouldanyonehavereasonablecertaintythatmarriagewoulddothis？Itseemedtohimthatinhisattempttobemoralhehadbeenfollowingadevilwhichhaddisguiseditselfasanangeloflight。Butifso，whatgroundwasthereonwhichamanmightrestthesoleofhisfootandtreadinreasonablesafety？
Hewasstilltooyoungtoreachtheanswer，“Oncommonsense“——ananswerwhichhewouldhavefelttobeunworthyofanyonewhohadanidealstandard。
Howeverthismightbe，itwasplainthathehadnowdoneforhimself。Ithadbeenthuswithhimallhislife。Iftherehadcomeatanytimeagleamofsunshineandhope，itwastobeobscuredimmediately——why，prisonwashappierthanthis！There，atanyrate，hehadhadnomoneyanxieties，andthesewerebeginningtoweighuponhimnowwithalltheirhorrors。HewashappierevennowthanhehadbeenatBattersbyoratRoughborough，andhewouldnotnowgoback，evenifhecould，tohisCambridgelife，butforallthattheoutlookwassogloomy，infactsohopeless，thathefeltasifhecouldhaveonlytoogladlygonetosleepanddiedinhisarm-chaironceforall。
Ashewasmusingthusandlookinguponthewreckofhishopes——forhesawwellenoughthataslongashewaslinkedtoEllenheshouldneverriseashehaddreamedofdoing——heheardanoisebelow，andpresentlyaneighbourranupstairsandenteredhisroomhurriedly-
“Goodgracious，MrPontifex。”sheexclaimed，“forgoodness’sakecomedownquicklyandhelp。OMrsPontifexistookwiththehorrors——andshe’sorkard。”
Theunhappymancamedownashewasbidandfoundhiswifemadwithdeliriumtremens。
Heknewallnow。Theneighboursthoughthemusthaveknownthathiswifedrankallalong，butEllenhadbeensoartful，andhesosimple，that，asIhavesaid，hehadhadnosuspicion。“Why。”saidthewomanwhohadsummonedhim，“she’lldrinkanythingshecanstandupandpayhermoneyfor。”Ernestcouldhardlybelievehisears，butwhenthedoctorhadseenhiswifeandshehadbecomemorequiet，hewentovertothepublichousehardbyandmadeenquiries，theresultofwhichrenderedfurtherdoubtimpossible。Thepublicantooktheopportunitytopresentmyherowithabillofseveralpoundsforbottlesofspiritssuppliedtohiswife，andwhatwithhiswife’sconfinementandthewaybusinesshadfallenoff，hehadnotthemoneytopaywith，forthesumexceededtheremnantofhissavings。
Hecametome——notformoney，buttotellmehismiserablestory。I
hadseenforsometimethattherewassomethingwrong，andhadsuspectedprettyshrewdlywhatthematterwas，butofcourseIsaidnothing。ErnestandIhadbeengrowingapartforsometime。Iwasvexedathishavingmarried，andheknewIwasvexed，thoughIdidmybesttohideit。
Aman’sfriendshipsare，likehiswill，invalidatedbymarriage——buttheyarealsonolessinvalidatedbythemarriageofhisfriends。
Theriftinfriendshipwhichinvariablymakesitsappearanceonthemarriageofeitherofthepartiestoitwasfastwidening，asitnolessinvariablydoes，intothegreatgulfwhichisfixedbetweenthemarriedandtheunmarried，andIwasbeginningtoleavemyprotegetoafatewithwhichIhadneitherrightnorpowertomeddle。InfactIhadbeguntofeelhimratheraburden；IdidnotsomuchmindthiswhenIcouldbeofuse，butIgrudgeditwhenIcouldbeofnone。Hehadmadehisbedandhemustlieuponit。Ernesthadfeltallthisandhadseldomcomenearmetillnow，oneeveninglatein1860，hecalledonme，andwithaverywoebegonefacetoldmehistroubles。
AssoonasIfoundthathenolongerlikedhiswifeIforgavehimatonce，andwasasmuchinterestedinhimasever。Thereisnothinganoldbachelorlikesbetterthantofindayoungmarriedmanwhowisheshehadnotgotmarried——especiallywhenthecaseissuchanextremeonethatheneednotpretendtohopethatmatterswillcomeallrightagain，orencouragehisyoungfriendtomakethebestofit。
Iwasmyselfinfavourofaseparation，andsaidIwouldmakeEllenanallowancemyself——ofcourseintendingthatitshouldcomeoutofErnest’smoney；buthewouldnothearofthis。HehadmarriedEllen，hesaid，andhemusttrytoreformher。Hehatedit，buthemusttry；andfindinghimasusualveryobstinateIwasobligedtoacquiesce，thoughwithlittleconfidenceastotheresult。Iwasvexedatseeinghimwastehimselfuponsuchabarrentask，andagainbegantofeelhimburdensome。IamafraidIshowedthis，forheagainavoidedmeforsometime，and，indeed，formanymonthsI
hardlysawhimatall。
Ellenremainedveryillforsomedays，andthengraduallyrecovered。
Ernesthardlylefthertillshewasoutofdanger。Whenshehadrecoveredhegotthedoctortotellherthatifshehadsuchanotherattackshewouldcertainlydie；thissofrightenedherthatshetookthepledge。
Thenhebecamemorehopefulagain。Whenshewassobershewasjustwhatshewasduringthefirstdaysofhermarriedlife，andsoquickwashetoforgetpain，thatafterafewdayshewasasfondofherasever。ButEllencouldnotforgivehimforknowingwhathedid。
Sheknewthathewasonthewatchtoshieldherfromtemptation，andthoughhedidhisbesttomakeherthinkthathehadnofurtheruneasinessabouther，shefoundtheburdenofherunionwithrespectabilitygrowmoreandmoreheavyuponher，andlookedbackmoreandmorelonginglyuponthelawlessfreedomofthelifeshehadledbeforeshemetherhusband。
Iwilldwellnolongeronthispartofmystory。Duringthespringmonthsof1861shekeptstraight——shehadhadherflingofdissipation，andthis，togetherwiththeimpressionmadeuponherbyherhavingtakenthepledge，tamedherforawhile。Theshopwentfairlywell，andenabledErnesttomakethetwoendsmeet。Inthespringandsummerof1861heevenputbyalittlemoneyagain。Intheautumnhiswifewasconfinedofaboy——averyfineone，soeveryonesaid。Shesoonrecovered，andErnestwasbeginningtobreathefreelyandbealmostsanguinewhen，withoutawordofwarning，thestormbrokeagain。Hereturnedoneafternoonabouttwoyearsafterhismarriage，andfoundhiswifelyinguponthefloorinsensible。
Fromthistimehebecamehopeless，andbegantogovisiblydownhill。Hehadbeenknockedabouttoomuch，andtheluckhadgonetoolongagainsthim。Thewearandtearofthelastthreeyearshadtoldonhim，andthoughnotactuallyillhewasover-worked，belowpar，andunfitforanyfurtherburden。
Hestruggledforawhiletopreventhimselffromfindingthisout，butfactsweretoostrongforhim。Againhecalledonmeandtoldmewhathadhappened。Iwasgladthecrisishadcome；IwassorryforEllen，butacompleteseparationfromherwastheonlychanceforherhusband。Evenafterthislastoutbreakhewasunwillingtoconsenttothis，andtalkednonsenseaboutdyingathispost，tillI
gottiredofhim。EachtimeIsawhimtheoldgloomhadsettledmoreandmoredeeplyuponhisface，andIhadaboutmadeupmymindtoputanendtothesituationbyacoupdemain，suchasbribingEllentorunawaywithsomebodyelse，orsomethingofthatkind，whenmatterssettledthemselvesasusualinawaywhichIhadnotanticipated。
Thewinterhadbeenatryingone。Ernesthadonlypaidhiswaybysellinghispiano。Withthisheseemedtocutawaythelastlinkthatconnectedhimwithhisearlierlife，andtosinkonceforallintothesmallshop-keeper。Itseemedtohimthathoweverlowhemightsinkhispaincouldnotlastmuchlonger，forheshouldsimplydieifitdid。
HehatedEllennow，andthepairlivedinopenwantofharmonywitheachother。Ifithadnotbeenforhischildren，hewouldhaveleftherandgonetoAmerica，buthecouldnotleavethechildrenwithEllen，andasfortakingthemwithhimhedidnotknowhowtodoit，norwhattodowiththemwhenhehadgotthemtoAmerica。Ifhehadnotlostenergyhewouldprobablyintheendhavetakenthechildrenandgoneoff，buthisnervewasshaken，sodayafterdaywentbyandnothingwasdone。
Hehadonlygotafewshillingsintheworldnow，exceptthevalueofhisstock，whichwasverylittle；hecouldgetperhaps3poundsor4poundsbysellinghismusicandwhatfewpicturesandpiecesoffurniturestillbelongedtohim。Hethoughtoftryingtolivebyhispen，buthiswritinghaddroppedofflongago；henolongerhadanideainhishead。Lookwhichwayhewouldhesawnohope；theend，ifithadnotactuallycome，waswithineasydistanceandhewasalmostfacetofacewithactualwant。Whenhesawpeoplegoingaboutpoorlyclad，orevenwithoutshoesandstockings，hewonderedwhetherwithinafewmonths’timehetooshouldnothavetogoaboutinthisway。Theremorseless，resistlesshandoffatehadcaughthiminitsgripandwasdragginghimdown，down，down。Stillhestaggeredon，goinghisdailyrounds，buyingsecond-handclothes，andspendinghiseveningsincleaningandmendingthem。
