第18章

类别:其他 作者:Wilkie Collins字数:4530更新时间:18/12/21 17:27:55
OngettingbacktothehouseIinformedMissHalcombeofwhatIintendedtodo。ShelookedsurPrisedanduneasywhileIwasexplainingmypurpose,butshemadenopositiveobjectiontotheexecutionofit。Sheonlysaid,`Ihopeitmayendwell。’Justasshewasleavingmeagain,Istoppedhertoinquire,ascalmlyasIcould,afterMissFairlie’shealth。Shewasinbetterspirits,andMissHalcombehopedshemightbeinducedtotakealittlewalkingexercisewhiletheafternoonsunlasted。 Ireturnedtomyownroomtoresumesettingthedrawingsinorder。Itwasnecessarytodothis,anddoublynecessarytokeepmymindemployedonanythingthatwouldhelptodistractmyattentionfrommyself,andfromthehopelessfuturethatlaybeforeme。FromtimetotimeIpausedinmyworktolookoutofwindowandwatchtheskyasthesunsanknearerandnearertothehorizon。OnoneofthoseoccasionsIsawafigureonthebroadgravelwalkundermywindow。ItwasMissFairlie。 Ihadnotseenhersincethemorning,andIhadhardlyspokentoherthen。AnotherdayatLimmeridgewasallthatremainedtome,andafterthatdaymyeyesmightneverlookonheragain。Thisthoughtwasenoughtoholdmeatthewindow。Ihadsufficientconsiderationforhertoarrangetheblindsothatshemightnotseemeifshelookedup,butIhadnostrengthtoresistthetemptationoflettingmyeyes,atleast,followherasfarastheycouldonherwalk。 Shewasdressedinabrowncloak,withaPlainblacksilkgownunderit。Onherheadwasthesamesimplestrawhatwhichshehadwornonthemorningwhenwefirstmet。Aveilwasattachedtoitnowwhichhidherfacefromme。ByhersidetrottedalittleItaliangreyhound,thepetcompanionofallherwalks,smartlydressedinascarletclothwrapper,tokeepthesharpairfromhisdelicateskin。Shedidnotseemtonoticethedog。Shewalkedstraightforward,withherheaddroopingalittle,andherarmsfoldedinhercloak。Thedeadleaves,whichhadwhirledinthewindbeforemewhenIhadheardofhermarriageengagementinthemorning,whirledinthewindbeforeher,androseandfellandscatteredthemselvesatherfeetasshewalkedoninthepalewaningsunlight-Thedogshiveredandtrembled,andpressedagainstherdressimpatientlyfornoticeandencouragement。 Butsheneverheededhim。Shewalkedon,fartherandfartherawayfromme,withthedeadleaveswhirlingaboutheronthepath——walkedon,tillmyachingeyescouldseehernomore,andIwasleftaloneagainwithmyownheavyheart。 Inanotherhour’stimeIhaddonemywork,andthesunsetwasathand。 Igotmyhatandcoatinthehall,andslippedoutofthehousewithoutmeetinganyone。 Thecloudswerewildinthewesternheaven,andthewindblewchillfromthesea。farastheshorewas,thesoundofthesurfsweptovertheinterveningmoorland,andbeatdrearilyinmyearswhenIenteredthechurchyard。 Notalivingcreaturewasinsight。TheplacelookedlonelierthaneverasIchosemyposition,andwaitedandwatched,withmyeyesonthewhitecrossthatroseoverMrsFairlie’sgrave。 [NextChapter][TableofContents]WomaninWhite:Chapter6[PreviousChapter][TableofContents]Chapter6XIITheexposedsituationofthechurchyardhadobligedmetobecautiousinchoosingthepositionthatIwastooccupy。 Themainentrancetothechurchwasonthesidenexttotheburial-ground,andthedoorwasscreenedbyaporchwalledinoneitherside。Aftersomelittlehesitation,causedbynaturalreluctancetoconcealmyself,indispensableasthatconcealmentwastotheobjectinview,Ihadresolvedonenteringtheporch。Aloopholewindowwaspiercedineachofitssidewalls。ThroughoneofthesewindowsIcouldseeMrsFairlie’sgrave。Theotherlookedtowardsthestonequarryinwhichthesexton’scottagewasbuilt。Beforeme,frontingtheporchentrance,wasapatchofbareburial-ground,alineoflowstonewall,andastripoflonelybrownhill,withthesunsetcloudssailingheavilyoveritbeforethestrong,steadywind。Nolivingcreaturewasvisibleoraudible——nobirdflewbyme,nodogbarkedfromthesexton’scottage。Thepausesinthedullheatingofthesurfwerefilledupbythedrearyrustlingofthedwarftreesnearthegrave,andthecoldfaintbubbleofthebrookoveritsstonybed。Adrearysceneandadrearyhour。MyspiritssankfastasIcountedouttheminutesoftheeveninginmyhiding-placeunderthechurchporch。 Itwasnottwilightyet——thelightofthesettingsunstilllingeredintheheavens,andlittlemorethanthefirsthalf-hourofmysolitarywatchhadelapsed——whenIheardfootstepsandavoice。Thefootstepswereapproachingfromtheothersideofthechurch,andthevoicewasawoman’s。 `Don’tyoufret,mydear,abouttheletter,’saidthevoice。`Igaveittotheladquitesafe,andtheladhetookitfrommewithoutaword。 HewenthiswayandIwentmine,andnotalivingsoulfollowedmeafterwards——thatI’llwarrant。’ Thesewordsstrungupmyattentiontoapitchofexpectationthatwasalmostpainful。Therewasapauseofsilence,butthefootstepsstilladvanced。 Inanothermomenttwopersons,bothwomen,passedwithinmyrangeofviewfromtheporchwindow。Theywerewalkingstraighttowardsthegrave;andthereforetheyhadtheirbacksturnedtowardsme。 Oneofthewomenwasdressedinabonnetandshawl。Theotherworealongtravelling-cloakofadark-bluecolour,withthehooddrawnoverherhead。Afewinchesofhergownwerevisiblebelowthecloak。MyheartbeatfastasInotedthecolour——itwaswhite。 Afteradvancingabouthalf-waybetweenthechurchandthegravetheystopped,andthewomaninthecloakturnedherheadtowardshercompanion。 Buthersideface,whichabonnetmightnowhaveallowedmetosee,washiddenbytheheavy,projectingedgeofthehood。 `Mindyoukeepthatcomfortablewarmcloakon,’saidthesamevoicewhichIhadalreadyheard——thevoiceofthewomanintheshawl。`MrsToddisrightaboutyourlookingtooparticular,yesterday,allinwhite。 I’llwalkaboutalittlewhileyou’rehere,churchyardsbeingnotatallinmyway,whatevertheymaybeinyours。FinishwhatyouwanttodobeforeIcomeback,andletusbesureandgethomeagainbeforenight。’ Withthosewordssheturnedabout,andretracinghersteps,advancedwithherfacetowardsme。Itwasthefaceofanelderlywoman,brown,rugged,andhealthy,withnothingdishonestorsuspiciousinthelookofit。Closetothechurchshestoppedtopullhershawlcloserroundher。 `Queer,’shesaidtoherself,`alwaysqueer,withherwhimsandherways,eversinceIcanrememberher。Harmless,though——asharmless,poorsoul,asalittlechild。’ Shesighed——lookedabouttheburial-groundnervously——shookherhead,asifthedrearyprospectbynomeanspleasedher,anddisappearedroundthecornerofthechurch。 IdoubtedforamomentwhetherIoughttofollowandspeaktoherornot。Myintenseanxietytofindmyselffacetofacewithhercompanionhelpedmetodecideinthenegative。Icouldensureseeingthewomanintheshawlbywaitingnearthechurchyarduntilshecameback——althoughitseemedmorethandoubtfulwhethershecouldgivemetheinformationofwhichIwasinsearch。Thepersonwhohaddeliveredtheletterwasoflittleconsequence。Thepersonwhohadwrittenitwastheonecentreofinterest,andtheonesourceofinformation,andthatpersonInowfeltconvincedwasbeforemeinthechurchyard。 WhiletheseideaswerepassingthroughmymindIsawthewomaninthecloakapproachclosetothegrave,andstandlookingatitforalittlewhile。Shethenglancedallroundher,andtakingawhitelinenclothorhandkerchieffromunderhercloak,turnedasidetowardsthebrook。Thelittlestreamranintothechurchyardunderatinyarchwayinthebottomofthewall,andranoutagain,afterawindingcourseofafewdozenyards,underasimilaropening。Shedippedtheclothinthewater,andreturnedtothegrave。Isawherkissthewhitecross,thenkneeldownbeforetheinscription,andapplyherwetclothtothecleansingofit。 AfterconsideringhowIcouldshowmyselfwiththeleastpossiblechanceoffrighteningher,Iresolvedtocrossthewallbeforeme,toskirtrounditoutside,andtoenterthechurchyardagainbythestilenearthegrave,inorderthatshemightseemeasIapproached。ShewassoabsorbedoverheremploymentthatshedidnothearmecominguntilIhadsteppedoverthestile。Thenshelookedup,startedtoherfeetwithafaintcry,andstoodfacingmeinspeechlessandmotionlessterror。 `Don’tbefrightened,’Isaid。`Surelyyourememberme?’ IstoppedwhileIspoke——thenadvancedafewstepsgently——thenstoppedagain——andsoapproachedbylittleandlittletillIwasclosetoher。Iftherehadbeenanydoubtstillleftinmymind,itmusthavebeennowsetatrest。There,speakingaffrightedlyforitself——therewasthesamefaceconfrontingmeoverMrsFairlie’sgravewhichhadfirstlookedintomineonthehigh-roadbynight。 `Yourememberme?’Isaid。`Wemetverylate,andIhelpedyoutofindthewaytoLondon。Surelyyouhavenotforgottenthat?’ Herfeaturesrelaxed,andshedrewaheavybreathofrelief。Isawthenewlifeofrecognitionstirringslowlyunderthedeathlikestillnesswhichfearhadsetonherface。 `Don’tattempttospeaktomejustyet,’Iwenton。`Taketimetorecoveryourself——taketimetofeelquitecertainthatIamafriend。’ `Youareverykindtome,’shemurmured。`Askindnowasyouwerethen。’ Shestopped,andIkeptsilenceonmyside。Iwasnotgrantingtimeforcomposuretoheronly,Iwasgainingtimealsoformyself。Underthewanwildeveninglight,thatwomanandIweremettogetheragain,agravebetweenus,thedeadaboutus,thelonesomehillsclosingusroundoneveryside。Thetime,theplace,thecircumstancesunderwhichwenowstoodfacetofaceintheeveningstillnessofthatdrearyvalley——thelifelonginterestswhichmighthangsuspendedonthenextchancewordsthatpassedbetweenus——thesensethat,foraughtIknewtothecontrary,thewholefutureofLauraFairlie’slifemightbedetermined,forgoodorforevil,bymywinningorlosingtheconfidenceoftheforlorncreaturewhostoodtremblingbyhermother’sgrave——allthreatenedtoshakethesteadinessandtheself-controlonwhicheveryinchoftheprogressImightyetmakenowdepended。Itriedhard,asIfeltthis,topossessmyselfofallmyresources;Ididmyutmosttoturnthefewmomentsforreflectiontothebestaccount。 `Areyoucalmernow?’Isaid,assoonasIthoughtittimetospeakagain。`Canyoutalktomewithoutfeelingfrightened,andwithoutforgettingthatIamafriend?’