Youwerealittleboy，Isuppose，intheyeartwenty-seven？Iwasahandsomeyoungwomanatthattime，livingatOldWelmingham。Ihadacontemptiblefoolforahusband。Ihadalsothehonourofbeingacquainted(nevermindhow)withacertaingentleman(nevermindwhom)。Ishallnotcallhimbyhisname。WhyshouldI？Itwasnothisown。Heneverhadaname：youknowthat，bythistime，aswellasIdo。
Itwillbemoretothepurposetotellyouhowheworkedhimselfintomygoodgraces。Iwasbornwiththetastesofalady，andhegratifiedthem——inotherwords，headmiredme，andhemademepresents。Nowomancanresistadmirationandpresents——especiallypresents，providedtheyhappentobejustthethingshewants。Hewassharpenoughtoknowthat——mostmenare。Naturallyhewantedsomethinginreturn——allmendo。
Andwhatdoyouthinkwasthesomething？Themeresttrifle。Nothingbutthekeyofthevestry，andthekeyofthepressinsideit，whenmyhusband’sbackwasturned。OfcourseheliedwhenIaskedhimwhyhewishedmetogethimthekeysinthatprivateway。Hemighthavesavedhimselfthetrouble——Ididn’tbelievehim。ButIlikedmypresents，andIwantedmore。SoIgothimthekeys，withoutmyhusband’sknowledge，andIwatchedhim，withouthisownknowledge。Once，twice，fourtimesIwatchedhim，andthefourthtimeIfoundhimout。
Iwasneverover-scrupulouswhereotherpeople’saffairswereconcerned，andIwasnotover-scrupulousabouthisaddingonetothemarriagesintheregisteronhisownaccount。
OfcourseIknewitwaswrong，butitdidnoharmtome，whichwasonegoodreasonfornotmakingafussaboutit。AndIhadnotgotagoldwatchandchain，whichwasanother，stillbetter——andhehadpromisedmeonefromLondononlythedaybefore，whichwasathird，bestofall。
IfIhadknownwhatthelawconsideredthecrimetobe，andhowthelawpunishedit，Ishouldhavetakenpropercareofmyself，andhaveexposedhimthenandthere。ButIknewnothing，andIlongedforthegoldwatch。
AlltheconditionsIinsistedonwerethatheshouldtakemeintohisconfidenceandtellmeeverything。Iwasascuriousabouthisaffairsthenasyouareaboutminenow。Hegrantedmyconditions——why，youwillseepresently。
This，putinshort，iswhatIheardfromhim。HedidnotwillinglytellmeallthatItellyouhere。Idrewsomeofitfromhimbypersuasionandsomeofitbyquestions。Iwasdeterminedtohaveallthetruth，andI
believeIgotit。
Heknewnomorethananyoneelseofwhatthestateofthingsreallywasbetweenhisfatherandmothertillafterhismother’sdeath。Thenhisfatherconfessedit，andpromisedtodowhathecouldforhisson。Hediedhavingdonenothing——nothavingevenmadeawill。Theson(whocanblamehim？)wiselyprovidedforhimself。HecametoEnglandatonce，andtookpossessionoftheproperty。Therewasnoonetosuspecthim，andnoonetosayhimnay。Hisfatherandmotherhadalwayslivedasmanandwife——noneofthefewpeoplewhowereacquaintedwiththemeversupposedthemtobeanythingelse。Therightpersontoclaimtheproperty(ifthetruthhadbeenknown)wasadistantrelation，whohadnoideaofevergettingit，andwhowasawayatseawhenhisfatherdied。Hehadnodifficultysofar——hetookpossession，asamatterofcourse。Buthecouldnotborrowmoneyonthepropertyasamatterofcourse。Thereweretwothingswantedofhimbeforehecoulddothis。Onewasacertificateofhisbirth，andtheotherwasacertificateofhisparents’marriage。Thecertificateofhisbirthwaseasilygot——hewasbornabroad，andthecertificatewasthereindueform。Theothermatterwasadifficulty，andthatdifficultybroughthimtoOldWelmingham。
ButforoneconsiderationhemighthavegonetoKnowlesburyinstead。
Hismotherhadbeenlivingtherejustbeforeshemetwithhisfather——livingunderhermaidenname，thetruthbeingthatshewasreallyamarriedwoman，marriedinIreland，whereherhusbandhadill-usedher，andhadafterwardsgoneoffwithsomeotherperson。Igiveyouthisfactongoodauthority——SirFelixmentionedittohissonasthereasonwhyhehadnotmarried。Youmaywonderwhytheson，knowingthathisparentshadmeteachotheratKnowlesbury，didnotplayhisfirsttrickswiththeregisterofthatchurch，whereitmighthavebeenfairlypresumedhisfatherandmotherweremarried。ThereasonwasthattheclergymanwhodiddutyatKnowlesburychurch，intheyeareighteenhundredandthree(when，accordingtohisbirthcertificate，hisfatherandmotheroughttohavebeenmarried)，wasalivestillwhenhetookpossessionofthepropertyintheNewYearofeighteenhundredandtwenty-seven。Thisawkwardcircumstanceforcedhimtoextendhisinquiriestoourneighbourhood。Therenosuchdangerexisted，theformerclergymanatourchurchhavingbeendeadforsomeyears。
OldWelminghamsuitedhispurposeaswellasKnowlesbury。HisfatherhadremovedhismotherfromKnowlesbury，andhadlivedwithheratacottageontheriver，alittledistancefromourvillage。Peoplewhohadknownhissolitarywayswhenhewassingledidnotwonderathissolitarywayswhenhewassupposedtobemarried。Ifhehadnotbeenahideouscreaturetolookit，hisretiredlifewiththeladymighthaveraisedsuspicions；
but，asthingswere，hishidinghisuglinessandhisdeformityinthestrictestprivacysurprisednobody。HelivedinourneighbourhoodtillhecameinpossessionofthePark。Afterthreeorfourandtwentyyearshadpassed，whowastosay(theclergymanbeingdead)thathismarriagehadnotbeenasprivateastherestofhislife，andthatithadnottakenplaceatOldWelmimghamchurch？
So，asItoldyou，thesonfoundourneighbourhoodthesurestplacehecouldchoosetosetthingsrightsecretlyinhisowninterests。Itmaysurpriseyoutohearthatwhathereallydidtothemarriageregisterwasdoneonthespurofthemoment——doneonsecondthoughts。
Hisfirstnotionwasonlytoteartheleafout(intherightyearandmonth)，todestroyitprivately，togobacktoLondon，andtotellthelawyerstogethimthenecessarycertificateofhisfather’smarriage，innocentlyreferringthemofcoursetothedateontheleafthatwasgone。
Nobodycouldsayhisfatherandmotherhadnotbeenmarriedafterthat，andwhether，underthecircumstances，theywouldstretchapointornotaboutlendinghimthemoney(hethoughttheywould)，hehadhisanswerreadyatallevents，ifaquestionwaseverraisedabouthisrighttothenameandtheestate。
Butwhenhecametolookprivatelyattheregisterforhimself，hefoundatthebottomofoneofthepagesfortheyeareighteenhundredandthreeablankspaceleft，seeminglythroughtherebeingnoroomtomakealongentrythere，whichwasmadeinsteadatthetopofthenextpage。Thesightofthischancealteredallhisplans。Itwasanopportunityhehadneverhopedfor，orthoughtof——andhetookit——youknowhow。Theblankspace，tohaveexactlytalliedwithhisbirthcertificate，oughttohaveoccurredintheJulypartoftheregister。ItoccurredintheSeptemberpartinstead。
However，inthiscase，ifsuspiciousquestionswereasked，theanswerwasnothardtofind。Hehadonlytodescribehimselfasasevenmonths’child。
Iwasfoolenough，whenhetoldmehisstory，tofeelsomeinterestandsomepityforhim——whichwasjustwhathecalculatedon，asyouwillsee。Ithoughthimhardlyused。Itwasnothisfaultthathisfatherandmotherwerenotmarried，anditwasnothisfather’sandmother’sfaulteither。AmorescrupulouswomanthanIwas——awomanwhohadnotsetherheartonagoldwatchandchain——wouldhavefoundsomeexcusesforhim。
Atallevents，Iheldmytongue，andhelpedtoscreenwhathewasabout。
Hewassometimegettingtheinktherightcolour(mixingitoverandoveragaininpotsandbottlesofmine)，andsometimeafterwardsinpractisingthehandwriting。Buthesucceededintheend，andmadeanhonestwomanofhismotheraftershewasdeadinhergrave！Sofar，Idon’tdenythathebehavedhonourablyenoughtomyself。Hegavememywatchandchain，andsparednoexpenseinbuyingthem；bothwereofsuperiorworkmanship，andveryexpensive。Ihavegotthemstill——thewatchgoesbeautifully。
YousaidtheotherdaythatMrsClementshadtoldyoueverythingsheknew。hithatcasethereisnoneedformetowriteaboutthetrumperyscandalbywhichIwasthesufferer——theinnocentsufferer，Ipositivelyassert。YoumustknowaswellasIdowhatthenotionwaswhichmyhusbandtookintohisheadwhenhefoundmeandmyfine-gentlemanacquaintancemeetingeachotherprivatelyandtalkingsecretstogether。Butwhatyoudon’tknowishowitendedbetweenthatsamegentlemanandmyself。Youshallreadandseehowhebehavedtome。
ThefirstwordsIsaidtohim，whenIsawtheturnthingshadtaken，were，`Domejustice——clearmycharacterofastainonitwhichyouknowIdon’tdeserve。Idon’twantyoutomakeacleanbreastofittomyhusband——onlytellhim，onyourwordofhonourasagentleman，thatheiswrong，andthatIamnottoblameinthewayhethinksIam。Domethatjustice，atleast，afterallIhavedoneforyou。’Heflatlyrefusedinsomanywords。Hetoldmeplainlythatitwashisinteresttoletmyhusbandandallmyneighboursbelievethefalsehood——because，aslongastheydidsotheywerequitecertainnevertosuspectthetruth。Ihadaspiritofmyown，andItoldhimtheyshouldknowthetruthfrommylips。Hisreplywasshort，andtothepoint。IfIspoke，Iwasalostwoman，ascertainlyashewasalostman。
Yes！ithadcometothat。HehaddeceivedmeabouttheriskIraninhelpinghim。Hehadpractisedonmyignorance，hehadtemptedmewithhisgifts，hehadinterestedmewithhisstory——andtheresultofitwasthathemademehisaccomplice。Heownedthiscoolly，andheendedbytellingme，forthefirsttime，whatthefrightfulpunishmentreallywasforhisoffence，andforanyonewhohelpedhimtocommitit。Inthosedaysthelawwasnotsotender-heartedasIhearitisnow。Murdererswerenottheonlypeopleliabletobehanged，andwomenconvictswerenottreatedlikeladiesinundeserveddistress。Iconfesshefrightenedme——themeanimposter！
thecowardlyblackguard！DoyouunderstandnowhowIhatedhim？DoyouunderstandwhyIamtakingallthistrouble——thankfullytakingit——
togratifythecuriosityofthemeritoriousyounggentlemanwhohuntedhimdown？
Well，togoon。Hewashardlyfoolenoughtodrivemetodownrightdesperation。
Iwasnotthesortofwomanwhomitwasquitesafetohuntintoacorner——heknewthat，andwiselyquietedmewithproposalsforthefuture。
Ideservedsomereward(hewaskindenoughtosay)fortheserviceI
haddonehim，andsomecompensation(hewassoobligingastoadd)forwhatIhadsuffered。Hewasquitewilling——generousscoundrel！——tomakemeahandsomeyearlyallowance，payablequarterly，ontwoconditions。
First，Iwastoholdmytongue——inmyowninterestsaswellasinhis。
Secondly，IwasnottostirawayfromWelminghamwithoutfirstlettinghimknow，andwaitingtillIhadobtainedhispermission。Inmyownneighbourhood，novirtuousfemalefriendswouldtemptmeintodangerousgossipingatthetea-table。Inmyownneighbourhood，hewouldalwaysknowwheretofindme。Ahardcondition，thatsecondone——butIacceptedit。
