Butthenitisabittertrialtobeholdhim，onhisreturn，doinghisutmosttosubvertmylaboursandtransformmyinnocent，affectionate，tractabledarlingintoaselfish，disobedient，andmischievousboy；therebypreparingthesoilforthoseviceshehassosuccessfullycultivatedinhisownpervertednature。
Happily，therewerenoneofArthur’s`friends’invitedtoGrassdalelastautumn：hetookhimselfofftovisitsomeoftheminstead。Iwishhewouldalwaysdoso，andIwishhisfriendswerenumerousandlovingenoughtokeephimamongstthemalltheyearround。Mr。Hargrave，considerablytomyannoyance，didnotgowithhim；butIthinkIhavedonewiththatgentlemanatlast。
Forsevenoreightmonths，hebehavedsoremarkablywell，andmanagedsoskilfullytoo，thatIwasalmostcompletelyoffmyguard，andwasreallybeginningtolookuponhimasafriend，andeventotreathimassuch，withcertainprudentrestrictions(whichIdeemedscarcelynecessary)；
when，presuminguponmyunsuspectingkindness，hethoughthemightventuretooversteptheboundsofdecentmoderationandproprietythathadsolongretainedhim。ItwasonapleasanteveningatthecloseofMay：Iwaswanderinginthepark，andhe，onseeingmethereasherodepast，madeboldtoenterandapproachme，dismountingandleavinghishorseatthegate。ThiswasthefirsttimehehadventuredtocomewithinitsinclosuresinceIhadbeenleftalone，withoutthesanctionofhismother’sorsister’scompany，oratleasttheexcuseofamessagefromthem。Buthemanagedtoappearsocalmandeasy，sorespectfulandself-possessedinhisfriendliness，that，thoughalittlesurprised，Iwasneitheralarmednoroffendedattheunusualliberty，andhewalkedwithmeundertheashtreesandbythewater-side，andtalked，withconsiderableanimation，goodtaste，andintelligence，onmanysubjects，beforeIbegantothinkaboutgettingridofhim。Then，afterapause，duringwhichwebothstoodgazingonthecalm，bluewater；
Irevolvinginmymindthebestmeansofpolitelydismissingmycompanion，he，nodoubt，ponderingothermattersequallyalientothesweetsightsandsoundsthatalonewerepresenttohissenses，——hesuddenlyelectrifiedmebybeginning，inapeculiartone，low，soft，butperfectlydistinct，topourforththemostunequivocalexpressionsofearnestandpassionatelove；pleadinghiscausewithalltheboldyetartfuleloquencehecouldsummontohisaid。ButIcutshorthisappeal，andrepulsedhimsodeterminately，sodecidedly，andwithsuchamixtureofscornfulindignationtemperedwithcool，dispassionatesorrowandpityforhisbenightedmind，thathewithdrew，astonished，mortified，anddiscomforted；and，afewdaysafter，IheardthathehaddepartedforLondon。Hereturnedhoweverineightornineweeks——anddidnotentirelykeepalooffromme，butcomportedhimselfinsoremarkableamannerthathisquick-sightedsistercouldnotfailtonoticethechange。
`WhathaveyoudonetoWalter，Mrs。Huntingdon？’saidsheonemorning，whenIhadcalledattheGrove，andhehadjustlefttheroomafterexchangingafewwordsofthecoldestcivility。`Hehasbeensoextremelyceremoniousandstatelyoflate，Ican’timaginewhatitisallabout，unlessyouhavedesperatelyoffendedhim。Tellmewhatitis，thatImaybeyourmediator，andmakeyoufriendsagain。’
`Ihavedonenothingwillinglytooffendhim，’saidI。`Ifheisoffended，hecanbesttellyouhimselfwhatitisabout。’
`I’llaskhim，’criedthegiddygirl，springingupandputtingherheadoutofthewindow；`he’sonlyinthegarden——Walter！’
`No，no，Esther！youwillseriouslydispleasemeifyoudo；andIshallleaveyouimmediately，andnotcomeagainformonths——perhapsyears。
`Didyoucall，Esther？’saidherbrother，approachingthewindowfromwithout。
`Yes；Iwantedtoaskyou——’
`Goodmorning，Esther，’saidI，takingherhandandgivingitaseveresqueeze。
`Toaskyou，’continuedshe，`togetmearoseforMrs。Huntingdon。’
Hedeparted。`Mrs。Huntingdon，’sheexclaimed，turningtomeandstillholdingmefastbythehand，`I’mquiteshockedatyou——you’rejustasangry，anddistant，andcoldasheis：andI’mdeterminedyoushallbeasgoodfriendsasever，beforeyougo。
`Esther，howcanyoubesorude！’criedMrs。Hargrave，whowasseatedgravelyknittinginhereasychair。`Surely，youneverwilllearntoconductyourselflikealady！’
`Wellmamma，yousaid，yourself——’Buttheyoungladywassilencedbytheupliftedfingerofhermamma，accompaniedwithaverysternshakeofthehead。
`Isn’tshecross？’whisperedshetome；but，beforeIcouldaddmyshareofreproof，Mr。Hargravereappearedatthewindowwithabeautifulmossroseinhishand。
`Here，Esther，I’vebroughtyoutherose，’saidhe，extendingittowardsher。
`Giveitheryourself，youblockhead！’criedshe，recoilingwithaspringfrombetweenus。
`Mrs。Huntingdonwouldratherreceiveitfromyou，’repliedheinaveryserioustone，butloweringhisvoicethathismothermightnothear。Hissistertooktheroseandgaveittome。
`Mybrother’scompliments，Mrs。Huntingdon，andhehopesyouandhewillcometoabetterunderstandingbyandby——Willthatdo，Walter？’
addedthesaucygirl，turningtohimandputtingherarmroundhisneck，ashestoodleaninguponthesillofthewindow——’orshouldIhavesaidthatyouaresorryyouweresotouchy？orthatyouhopeshewillpardonyouroffence？’
`Yousillygirl！youdon’tknowwhatyouaretalkingabout，’repliedhegravely。
`IndeedIdon’t；forI’mquiteinthedark。’
`NowEsther，’interposedMrs。Hargrave，who，ifequallybenightedonthesubjectofourestrangement，sawatleastthatherdaughterwasbehavingveryimproperly，`Imustinsistuponyourleavingtheroom！’
`Praydon’t，Mrs。Hargrave，forI’mgoingtoleaveitmyself，’
saidI，andimmediatelymademyadieux。
Aboutaweekafter，Mr。Hargravebroughthissistertoseeme。
Heconductedhimself，atfirst，withhisusualcold，distant，half-stately，half-melancholy，altogetherinjuredair；butEsthermadenoremarkuponitthistime；shehadevidentlybeenschooledintobettermanners。Shetalkedtome，andlaughedandrompedwithlittleArthur，herlovedandlovingplaymate。He，somewhattomydiscomfort，enticedherfromtheroomtohavearuninthehall；and，thence，intothegarden。Igotuptostirthefire。Mr。HargraveaskedifIfeltcold，andshutthedoorsveryunseasonablepieceofofficiousness，forIhadmeditatedfollowingthenoisyplayfellows，iftheydidnotspeedilyreturn。Hethentookthelibertyofwalkinguptothefirehimself，andaskingmeifIwereawarethatMr。HuntingdonwasnowattheseatofLordLowborough，andlikelytocontinuetheresometime。
`No；butit’snomatter，’Iansweredcarelessly；andifmycheekglowedlikefire，itwasratheratthequestionthantheinformationitconveyed。
`Youdon’tobjecttoit？’hesaid。
`Notatall，ifLordLowboroughlikeshiscompany。’
`Youhavenoloveleftforhim，then？’
`Nottheleast。’
`Iknewthat——knewyouweretoohigh-mindedandpureinyourownnaturetocontinuetoregardonesoutterlyfalseandpolluted，withanyfeelingsbutthoseofindignationandscornfulabhorrence！’
`Ishenotyourfriend？’saidI，turningmyeyesfromthefiretohisface，withperhapsaslighttouchofthosefeelingsheassignedtoanother。
`Hewas，’repliedhe，withthesamecalmgravityasbefore，`butdonotwrongmebysupposingthatIcouldcontinuemyfriendshipandesteemtoamanwhocouldsoinfamously——soimpiouslyforsakeandinjureonesotranscendently——well，Iwon’tspeakofit。Buttellme，doyouneverthinkofrevenge？’
`Revenge！No——whatgoodwouldthatdo？——itwouldmakehimnobetter，andmenohappier。’
`Idon’tknowhowtotalktoyou，Mrs。Huntingdon，’saidhesmiling；
`youareonlyhalfawoman——yournaturemustbehalfhuman，halfangelic。
Suchgoodnessoverawesme；Idon’tknowwhattomakeofit。’
`Thensir，Ifearyoumustbeverymuchworsethanyoushouldbe，ifI，amereordinarymortal，ambyyourownconfession，sovastlyyoursuperior；——andsincethereexistssolittlesympathybetweenus，I
thinkwehadbettereachlookoutforsomemorecongenialcompanion。’Andforthwithmovingtothewindow，Ibegantolookoutformylittlesonandhisgayyoungfriend。
`No，Iamtheordinarymortal，Imaintain，’repliedMr。Hargrave。
Iwillnotallowmyselftobeworsethanmyfellows；butyouMadam——Iequallymaintainthereisnobodylikeyou。Butareyouhappy？’heaskedinaserioustone。
`Ashappyassomeothers，Isuppose。’
`Areyouashappyasyoudesiretobe？’
`Nooneissoblestasthatcomesto，onthissideeternity。’
`OnethingIknow，’returnedhe，withadeep，sadsigh；`youareimmeasurablyhappierthanIam。’
`Iamverysorryforyou，then，’Icouldnothelpreplying。
`Areyouindeed？——No——forifyouwere，youwouldbegladtorelieveme。’
`AndsoIshould，ifIcoulddoso，withoutinjuringmyselforanyother。’
`AndcanyousupposethatIshouldwishyoutoinjureyourself？——No；
onthecontrary，itisyourownhappinessIlongformorethanmine。Youaremiserablenow，Mrs。Huntingdon，’continuedhe，lookingmeboldlyintheface。`Youdonotcomplain，butIsendfeel——andknowthatyouaremiserableandmustremainso，aslongasyoukeepthosewallsofimpenetrableiceaboutyourstillwarmandpalpitatingheart；——andIammiserabletoo。
Deigntosmileonme，andIamhappy：trustme，andyoushallbehappyalso，forifyouareawoman，IcanmakeyousoundIwilldoitinspiteofyourself！’hemutteredbetweenhisteeth，`andasforothers，thequestionisbetweenourselvesalone：youcannotinjureyourhusband，youknow；andnooneelsehasanyconcerninthematter。’
`Ihaveason，Mr。Hargrave，andyouhaveamother，’saidI，retiringfromthewindow，whitherhehadfollowedme。
`Theyneednotknow，’hebegan，butbeforeanythingmorecouldbesaidoneitherside，EstherandArthurre-enteredtheroom。TheformerglancedatWalter’sflushed，excitedcountenance，andthenatminedlittleflushedandexcitedtoo，Idaresay，thoughfromfardifferentcauses。
Shemusthavethoughtwehadbeenquarrellingdesperately，andwasevidentlyperplexedanddisturbedatthecircumstance；butshewastoopolite，ortoomuchafraidofherbrother’sangertorefertoit。Sheseatedherselfonthesofa，andputtingbackherbright，goldenringlets，thatWerescatteredinwildprofusionoverherface，sheimmediatelybegantotalkaboutthegardenandherlittleplayfellow，andcontinuedtochatterawayinherusualstraintillherbrothersummonedhertodepart。
`IfIhavespokentoowarmly，forgiveme，’hemurmuredontakinghisleave，`orIshallneverforgivemyself。’
Esthersmiledandglancedatme：Imerelybowed，andhercountenancefell。ShethoughtitapoorreturnforWalter’sgenerousconcession，andwasdisappointedinherfriend。Poorchild，shelittleknowstheworldshelivesin！
Mr。Hargravehadnotanopportunityofmeetingmeagaininprivateforseveralweeksafterthis；butwhenhedidmeetme，therewaslessofprideandmoreoftouchingmelancholyinhismannerthanbefore。Oh，howheannoyedme！Iwasobliged，atlastalmostentirelytoremitmyvisitstotheGrove，attheexpenseofdeeplyoffendingMrs。HargraveandseriouslyafflictingpoorEsther，whoreallyvaluesmysociety——forwantofbetter，andwhooughtnottosufferforthefaultofherbrother。Butthatindefatigablefoewasnotyetvanquished：`heseemedtobealwaysonthewatch。Ifrequentlysawhimridinglingeringlypastthepremises，lookingsearchinglyroundhimashewent——orifIdidnot，Racheldid。Thatsharp-sightedwomansoonguessedhowmattersstoodbetweenus，anddescryingtheenemy’smovementsfromherelevationatthenurserywindow，shewouldgivemeaquietintimation，ifshesawmepreparingforawalkwhenshehadreasontobelievehewasabout，ortothinkitlikelythathewouldmeetorovertakemeinthewayImeanttotraverse。Iwouldthendefermyramble，orconfinemyselfforthatdaytotheparkandgardens——oriftheproposedexcursionwasamatterofimportance，suchasavisittothesickorafflicted，IwouldtakeRachelwithme，andthenIwasnevermolested。
Butonemild，sunshinyday，earlyinNovember，Ihadventuredforthalone，tovisitthevillageschoolandafewofthepoortenants，andonmyreturn，Iwasalarmedattheclatterofahorse’sfeetbehindmeapproachingatarapid，steadytrot。Therewasnostileorgapathand，bywhichIcouldescapeintothefields：soIwalkedquietlyon，sayingtomyself
