`Youknewit！’criedhewithbittervehemence——andyoudidnottellme！Youhelpedtodeceiveme！’
`Mylord，Ididnothelptodeceiveyou。’
`Thenwhydidyounottellme？’
`Because，Iknewitwouldbepainfultoyou——Ihopedshewouldreturntoherduty，andthentherewouldbenoneedtoharrowyourfeelingswithsuch`OGod！howlonghasthisbeengoingon？howlonghasitbeen，Mrs。Huntingdon？——Tellme——IMUSTknow！’heexclaimedwithintenseandfearfuleagerness。
`Twoyears，Ibelieve。’
`GreatHeaven！andshehasdupedmeallthistime！’Heturnedawaywithasuppressedgroanofagony，andpacedtheroomagain，inaparoxysmofrenewedagitation。Myheartsmoteme；butIwouldtrytoconsolehim，thoughIknewnothowtoattemptit。
`Sheisawickedwoman，’Isaid。`Shehasbaselydeceivedandbetrayedyou。Sheisaslittleworthyofyourregretasshewasofyouraffection。Letherinjureyounofarther：abstractyourselffromher，andstandalone。’
`Andyou，Madam，’saidhesternly，arrestinghiswalkandturningrounduponme——`youhaveinjuredmetoo，bythisungenerousconcealment！’
Therewasasuddenrevulsioninmyfeelings。Somethingrosewithinme，andurgedmetoresentthisharshreturnformyheartfeltsympathy，anddefendmyselfwithansweringseverity。Happily，Ididnotyieldtotheimpulse。Isawhisanguishas，suddenlysmitinghisforehead，heturnedabruptlytothewindow，and，lookingupwardattheplacidsky，murmuredpassionately，`OGod，thatImightdie！’——andfeltthattoaddonedropofbitternesstothatalreadyoverflowingcup，wouldbeungenerousindeed。
Andyet，Ifeartherewasmorecoldnessthangentlenessinthequiettoneofmyreply：——
`Imightoffermanyexcusesthatsomewouldadmittobevalid，butIwillnotattempttoenumeratethem——’
`Iknowthem，’saidhehastily，`youwouldsaythatitwasnobusinessofyours——thatIoughttohavetakencareofmyself——thatifmyownblindnesshasledmeintothispitofhell，IhavenorighttoblameanotherforgivingmecreditforalargeramountofsagacitythanIpossessed——’
`IconfessIwaswrong，’continuedI，withoutregardingthisbitterinterruption；`butwhetherwantofcourageormistakenkindnesswasthecauseofmyerror，Ithinkyoublamemetooseverely。ItoldLadyLowboroughtwoweeksago，theveryhourshecame，thatIshouldcertainlythinkitmydutytoinformyouifshecontinuedtodeceiveyou：shegavemefulllibertytodosoifIshouldseeanythingreprehensibleorsuspiciousinherconduct——Ihaveseennothing；andItrustedshehadalteredhercourse。
HecontinuedgazingfromthewindowwhileIspoke，anddidnotanswer，but，stungbytherecollectionsmywordsawakened，stampedhisfootuponthefloor，groundhisteeth，andcorrugatedhisbrow，likeoneundertheinfluenceofacutephysicalpain。
`Itwaswrong——itwaswrong！’hemuttered，atlength。`Nothingcanexcuseit——nothingcanatoneforit，——fornothingcanrecallthoseyearsofcursedcredulity——nothingobliteratethem！——nothing，nothing！’
herepeatedinawhisperwhosedespairingbitternessprecludedallresentment。
`WhenIputthecasetomyself，Iownitwaswrong，’I
answered；`butIcanonlynowregretthatIdidnotseeitinthislightbefore，andthat，asyousay，nothingcanrecallthepast。’
Somethinginmyvoiceorinthespiritofthisanswerseemedtoalterhismood。Turningtowardsmeandattentivelysurveyingmyfacebythedimlight，hesaidinamildertonethanhehadyetemployed，——
`Youtoohavesuffered，Isuppose。’
`Isufferedmuch，atfirst。’
`Whenwasthat？’
`Twoyearsago；andtwoyearshenceyouwillbeascalmasIamnow，——andfar，farhappier，Itrust，foryouareaman，andfreetoactasyouplease。’
Somethinglikeasmile，butaverybitterone，crossedhisfaceforamoment。
`Youhavenotbeenhappylately？’hesaidwithakindofefforttoregaincomposure，andadeterminationtowaivethefurtherdiscussionofhisowncalamity。
`Happy！’Irepeated，almostprovokedatsuchaquestion——`CouldIbeso，withsuchahusband？’
`Ihavenoticedachangeinyourappearancesincethefirstyearsofyourmarriage，’pursuedhe：`Iobservedittoothatinfernaldemon，’
hemutteredbetweenhisteeth——`andhesaiditwasyourownsourtemperthatwaseatingawayyourbloom：itwasmakingyouoldanduglybeforeyourtime，andhadalreadymadehisfire-sideascomfortlessasaconventcell——YousmileMrs。Huntingdon——nothingmovesyou。Iwishmynaturewereascalmasyours！’
`Mynaturewasnotoriginallycalm，’saidI：`Ihavelearnedtoappearsobydintofhardlessons，andmanyrepeatedefforts。
AtthisjunctureMr。Hattersleyburstintotheroom。
`Hallow，Lowborough！’hebegan——`Oh！Ibegyourpardon，’heexclaimedonseeingme；`Ididn’tknowitwasatê；te-a-tê；te。
Cheerup，man！’hecontinued，givingLordLowboroughathumpontheback，whichcausedthelattertorecoilfromhimwithlooksofineffabledisgustandirritation。`Come，Iwanttospeakwithyouabit。’
`Speak，then。’
`ButI’mnotsureitwouldbequiteagreeabletothelady，whatIhavetosay。’
`Thenitwouldnotbeagreeabletome，’saidhislordship，turningtoleavetheroom。
`Yes，itwould，’criedtheother，followinghimintothehall。
`Ifyou’vetheheartofamanitwouldbetheveryticketforyou。It’sjustthis，mylad，’hecontinued，ratherloweringhisvoice，butnotenoughtopreventmefromhearingeverywordhesaid，thoughthehalf-closeddoorstoodbetweenus：`Ithinkyou’reanill-usedman——nay，now，don’tflareup——Idon’twanttooffendyou：it’sonlymyroughwayoftalking。Imustspeakrightoutyouknow，orelsenotatall；——andI’mcome——stopnow！letmeexplain——I’mcometoofferyoumyservices，forthoughHuntingdonismyfriend，he’sadevilishscampasweallknow，andI’llbeyourfriendforthenonce。Iknowwhatitisyouwant，tomakemattersstraight：
it’sjusttoexchangeashotwithhim，andthenyou’llfeelyourselfallrightagain；andifanaccidenthappens——why，that’llbeallrighttoo，Idaresay，toadesperatefellowlikeyou——menow！givemeyourhand，anddon’tlooksoblackuponit。Nametimeandplace，andI’llmanagetherest。’
`That，’answeredthemorelow，deliberatevoiceofLordLowborough，`isjusttheremedymyownheart——orthedevilwithinit，suggested——tomeethim，andnottoseverwithoutblood。WhetherIorheshouldfall——orboth，itwouldbeaninexpressiblerelieftome，if——’
`Justso！Wellthen——’
`No！’exclaimedhislordshipwithdeep，determinedemphasis。`ThoughIhatehimfrommyheart，andshouldrejoiceatanycalamitythatcouldbefallhim——I’llleavehimtoGod；andthoughIabhormyownlife，I’llleavethattoo，toHimthatgave’
`Butyouseeinthiscase，’pleadedHattersley——
`I’llnothearyou！’exclaimedhiscompanion，hastilyturningaway。`Notanotherword！I’veenoughtodoagainstthefiendwithinme。’
`Thenyou’reawhiteliveredfool，andIwashmyhandsofyou，’
grumbledthetempterasheswunghimselfroundanddeparted。
`Right，right，LordLowborough！’criedI，dartingoutandclaspinghisburninghand，ashewasmovingawaytothestairs。`Ibegintothinktheworldisnotworthyofyou！’
Notunderstandingthissuddenebullition，heturneduponmewithastareofgloomy，bewilderedamazementthatmademeashamedoftheimpulsetowhichIhadyielded；butsoonamorehumanizedexpressiondawneduponhiscountenance，and，beforeIcouldwithdrawmyhand，hepresseditkindly，whileagleamofgenuinefeelingflashedfromhiseyesashemurmured，——
`Godhelpusboth！’
`Amen！’respondedI；andweparted。
Ireturnedtothedrawing-room，where，doubtless，mypresencewouldbeexpectedbymost，desiredbyoneortwo。Intheante-roomwasMr。Hattersley，railingagainstLordLowborough’spoltroonerybeforeaselectaudience，viz。Mr。Huntingdon，whowasloungingagainstthetableexultinginhisowntreacherousvillainyandlaughinghisvictimtoscorn，andMr。Grimsby，standingby，quietlyrubbinghishandsandchucklingwithfiendishsatisfaction。AttheglanceIgavetheminpassing，Hattersleystoppedshortinhisanimadversionsandstaredlikeabullcalf，Grimsbyglowereduponmewithaleerofmalignantferocity，andmyhusbandmutteredacoarseandbrutalmalediction。
Inthedrawing-roomIfoundLadyLowborough，evidentlyinnoveryenviablestateofmind，andstrugglinghardtoconcealherdiscomposurebyanoverstrainedaffectationofunusualcheerfulnessandvivacity，veryuncalledforunderthecircumstances，forshehadherselfgiventhecompanytounderstandthatherhusbandhadreceivedunpleasantintelligencefromhome，whichnecessitatedhisimmediatedeparture，andthathehadsuffereditsotobotherhismindthatithadbroughtonabiliousheadache，owingtowhichandthepreparationshejudgednecessarytohastenhisdeparture，shebelievedtheywouldnothavethepleasureofseeinghimto-night。However，sheasserted，itwasonlyabusinessconcern，andsoshedidnotintenditshouldtroubleher。ShewasjustsayingthisasIentered，andshedarteduponmesuchaglanceofhardihoodanddefianceasatonceastonishedandrevoltedme。
`ButIamtroubled，’continuedshe，`andvexedtoo，forIthinkitmydutytoaccompanyhislordship，andofcourseIamverysorrytopartwithallmykindfriends，sounexpectedlyandsosoon。’
`Andyet，Annabella，’saidEsther，whowassittingbesideher，`Ineversawyouinbetterspiritsinmylife。’
`Preciselyso，mylove；becauseIwishtomakethebestofyoursociety，sinceitappearsthisistobethelastnightIamtoenjoyit，tillHeavenknowswhen；andIwishtoleaveagoodimpressiononyouall，’——sheglancedround，andseeingheraunt’seyefixeduponher，rathertooscrutinizingly，assheprobablythought，shestartedupandcontinued，——`towhichendI’llgiveyouasong-hallI，aunt？shallI，Mrs。Huntingdon？shallI，ladiesandgentlemen——all？——Verywell，I’lldomybesttoamuseyou。’
SheandLordLowboroughoccupiedtheapartmentsnexttomine。
Iknownothowshepassedthenight，butIlayawakethegreaterpartofitlisteningtohisheavysteppacingmonotonouslyupanddownhisdressing-room，whichwasnearestmychamber。OnceIheardhimpauseandthrowsomethingoutofthewindow，withapassionateejaculation；andinthemorning，aftertheyweregone，akeen-bladedclasp-knifewasfoundonthegrass-plotbelow；arazor，likewisewassnappedintwoandthrustdeepintothecindersofthegrate，butpartiallycorrodedbythedecayingembers。Sostronghadbeenthetemptationtoendhismiserablelife，sodeterminedhisresolutiontoresistit。
MyheartbledforhimasIlaylisteningtothatceaselesstread。
Hitherto，Ihadthoughttoomuchofmyself，toolittleofhim：nowIforgotmyownafflictions，andthoughtonlyofhis——oftheardentaffectionsomiserablywasted，thefondfaithsocruellybetrayed，the——no，Iwillnotattempttoenumeratehiswrongs，——butIhatedhiswifeandmyhusbandmoreintenselythanever，andnotformysake，butforhis。
`Thatman，’Ithought，`isanobjectofscorntohisfriendsandthenice-judgingworld。Thefalsewifeandthetreacherousfriendwhohavewrongedhimarenotsodespisedanddegradedashe；andhisrefusaltoavengehiswrongshasremovedhimyetfartherbeyondtherangeofsympathy，andblackenedhisnamewithadeeperdisgrace。Heknowsthis；anditdoubleshisburdenofwo。Heseestheinjusticeofit，buthecannotbearupagainstit；helacksthatsustainingpowerofself-esteemwhichleadsaman，exultinginhisownintegrity，todefythemaliceoftraducingfoesandgivethemscornforscorn——or，betterstill，whichraiseshimaboveearth’sfoulandturbulentvapours，toreposeinHeaven’seternalsunshine。HeknowsthatGodisjust，butcannotseeHisjusticenow：heknowsthislifeisshort，andyetdeathseemsinsufferablyfaraway；hebelievesthereisafuturestate，butsoabsorbingistheagonyofthisthathecannotrealizeitsrapturousrepose。Hecanbutbowhisheadtothestorm，andcling，blindly，despairingly，towhatheknowstoberight。Liketheshipwreckedmarinercleavingtoaraft，blinded，deafened，bewildered，hefeelsthewavessweepoverhim，andseesnoprospectofescape；andyetheknowshehasnohopebutthis，andstill，whilelifeandsenseremain，concentratesallhisenergiestokeepit。Oh，thatIhadafriend’srighttocomforthim，andtellhimthatIneveresteemedhimsohighlyasIdothisnight！’
Theydepartedearlyinthemorningbeforeanyoneelsewasdown，exceptmyself，andjustasIwasleavingmyroom，LordLowboroughwasdescendingtotakehisplaceinthecarriagewherehisladywasalreadyensconced；
andArthur(orMr。HuntingdonasIprefercallinghim，fortheotherismychild’sname)hadthegratuitousinsolencetocomeoutinhisdressing-gowntobidhis`friend’goodbye。
