`ItisHelenHuntingdon，’saidI，quietly，rising，atthesametime，andremovingtoalessconspicuousposition。
`Imustbegoingmad，’criedhe——`orsomething——deliriousperhaps——Butleaveme，whoeveryouare——Ican’tbearthatwhiteface，andthoseeyes——forGod’ssakego，andsendmesomebodyelse，thatdoesn’tlooklikethat！’
Iwent，atonce，andsentthehirednurse。Butnextmorning，I
venturedtoenterhischamberagain；and，takingthenurse’splacebyhisbed-side，Iwatchedhimandwaitedonhimforseveralhours，showingmyselfaslittleaspossible，andonlyspeakingwhennecessary，andthennotabovemybreath。Atfirstheaddressedmeusthenurse，but，onmycrossingtheroomtodrawupthewindow-blinds，inobediencetohisdirections，hesaid——
`No，itisn’tnurse；it’sAlice。Staywithmedo！thatoldhagwillbethedeathofme。’
`Imeantostaywithyou，’saidI。Andafterthat，hewouldcallmeAlice——orsomeothernamealmostequallyrepugnanttomyfeelings。I
forcedmyselftoendureitforawhile，fearingacontradictionmightdisturbhimtoomuch：butwhen，havingaskedforaglassofwater，whileIheldittohislips，hemurmured`Thanks，dearest！’——Icouldnothelpdistinctlyobserving——`Youwouldnotsaysoifyouknewme，’intendingtofollowthatupwithanotherdeclarationofmyidentity，buthemerelymutteredanincoherentreply，soIdroppeditagain，tillsometimeafter，when，asIwasbathinghisforeheadandtempleswithvinegarandwatertorelievetheheatandpaininhishead，heobserved，afterlookingearnestlyuponmeforsomeminutes——
`Ihavesuchstrangefancies——Ican’tgetridofthem，andtheywon’tletmerest；andthemostsingularandpertinaciousofthemall，isyourfaceandvoice；theyseemjustlikehers。Icouldswearatthismoment，thatshewasbymyside。’
`Sheis，’saidI。
`Thatseemscomfortable，’continuedhe，withoutnoticingmywords；
`andwhileyoudoit，theotherfanciesfadeaway——butthisonlystrengthens。Goontoon，tillitvanishestoo。Ican’tstandsuchamaniaasthis；itwouldkillme！’
`Itneverwillvanish，’saidIdistinctly，`foritisthetruth。’
`Thetruth！’hecried，startingasifanasphadstunghim。`Youdon’tmeantosaythatyouarereallyshe！’
`Ido；butyouneedn’tshrinkawayfromme，asifIwereyourgreatestenemy：Iamcometotakecareofyou，anddowhatnoneofthemwoulddo。’
`ForGod’ssake，don’ttormentmenow！’criedheinpitiableagitation；
andthenhebegantomutterbittercursesagainstme，ortheevilfortunethathadbroughtmethere；whileIputdownthespongeandbasin，andresumedmyseatatthebedside。
`Wherearethey？’saidhe`havetheyallleftme——servantsandall？’
`Thereareservantswithincall，ifyouwantthem；butyouhadbetterliedownnowandbequiet：noneofthemcouldorwouldattendyouascarefullyasIshalldo。’
`Ican’tunderstanditatall，’saidhe，inbewilderedperplexity。
`Wasitadreamthat`andhecoveredhiseyeswithhishand，asiftryingtounravelthemystery。
`NoArthur，itwasnotadream，thatyourconductwassuchastoobligemetoleaveyou；butIheardthatyouwereillandalone，andIamcomebacktonurseyou。Youneednotfeartotrustme：tellmeallyourwants，andIwilltrytosatisfythem。Thereisnooneelsetocareforyou；andIshallnotupbraidyounow。
`Oh！Isee，’saidhewithabittersmile，`it’sanactofChristiancharity，wherebyyouhopetogainahigherseatinHeavenforyourself，andscoopadeeperpitinhellforme。’
`No；Icametoofferyouthatcomfortandassistanceyoursituationrequired；andifIcouldbenefityoursoulaswellasyourbody，andawakensomesenseofcontritionand——’`Oh，yes；ifyoucouldoverwhelmmewithremorseandconfusionofface，’now’sthetime。Whathaveyoudonewithmyson？’
`Heiswell，andyoumayseehimsometime，ifyouwillcomposeyourself，butnotnow。
`Whereishe？’
`Heissafe。’
`Ishehere？’
`Whereverheis，youwillnotseehimtillyouhavepromisedtoleavehimentirelyundermycareandprotection，andtoletmetakehimawaywheneverandwhereverIplease，ifIshouldhereafterjudgeitnecessarytoremovehimagain。Butwewilltalkofthatto-morrow：youmustbequietnow。’
`No，letmeseehimnow。Ipromise，ifitmustbeso。
`No——’
`Iswearit，asGodisinHeaven！Nowthen，letmeseehim。’
`ButIcannottrustyouroathsandpromises：Imusthaveawrittenagreement，andyoumustsignitinpresenceofawitness——Butnotto-day，to-morrow。
`No，to-day——now，’persistedhe：andhewasinsuchastateoffeverishexcitement，andsobentupontheimmediategratificationofhiswish，thatIthoughtitbettertograntitatonce，asIsawhewouldnotresttillIdid。ButIwasdeterminedmyson’sinterestshouldnotbeforgotten；
andhavingclearlywrittenoutthepromiseIwishedMr。Huntingdontogiveuponaslipofpaper，Ideliberatelyreaditovertohim，andmadehimsignitinthepresenceofRachel。HebeggedIwouldnotinsistuponthis：
itwasauselessexposureofmywantoffaithinhisword，totheservant。
ItoldhimIwassorry，butsincehehadforfeitedmyconfidence，hemusttaketheconsequence。Henextpleadedinabilitytoholdthepen。`Thenwemustwaituntilyoucanholdit，’saidI。Uponwhich，hesaidhewouldtry；butthen，hecouldnotseetowrite。Iplacedmyfingerwherethesignaturewastobe，andtoldhimhemightwritehisnameinthedark，ifheonlyknewwheretoputit。Buthehadnotpowertoformtheletters。
`Inthatcase，youmustbetooilltoseethechild，’saidI；andfindingmeinexorable，heatlengthmanagedtoratifytheagreement；andIbadeRachelsendtheboy。
Allthismaystrikeyouasharsh，butIfeltImustnotlosemypresentadvantage，andmyson’sfuturewelfareshouldnotbesacrificedtoanymistakentendernessforthisman’sfeelings。LittleArthurhadnotforgottenhisfather，butthirteenmonthsofabsence，duringwhichhehadseldombeenpermittedtohearawordabouthim，orhardlytowhisperhisname，hadrenderedhimsomewhatshy；andwhenhewasusheredintothedarkenedroomwherethesickmanlay，soalteredfromhisformerself，withfiercelyflushedfaceandwildlygleamingeyes——heinstinctivelyclungtome，andstoodlookingonhisfatherwithacountenanceexpressiveoffarmoreawethanpleasure。
`Comehere，Arthur，’saidthelatter，extendinghishandtowardshim。Thechildwent，andtimidlytouchedthatburninghand，butalmoststartedinalarm，whenhisfathersuddenlyclutchedhisarmanddrewhimnearertohisside。
`Doyouknowme？’askedMr。Huntingdon，intentlyperusinghisfeatures。
`Yes。’
`WhoamI？’
`Papa。’
`Areyougladtoseeme？’
`Yes。’
`You’renot！’repliedthedisappointedparent，relaxinghishold，anddartingavindictiveglanceatme。
Arthur，thusreleased，creptbacktomeandputhishandinmine。
HisfathersworeIhadmadethechildhatehim，andabusedandcursedmebitterly。TheinstanthebeganIsentoursonoutoftheroom；andwhenhepausedtobreathe，Icalmlyassuredhimthathewasentirelymistaken；
Ihadneveronceattemptedtoprejudicehischildagainsthim。
`Ididindeeddesirehimtoforgetyou，’Isaid，`andespeciallytoforgetthelessonsyoutaughthim；andforthatcause，andtolessenthedangerofdiscovery，IownIhavegenerallydiscouragedhisinclinationtotalkaboutyou；——Butnoonecanblamemeforthat，Ithink。’
Theinvalidonlyrepliedbygroaningaloudandrollinghisheadonapillowinaparoxysmofimpatience。
`Iaminhell，already！’criedhe。`Thiscursedthirstisburningmyhearttoashes！Willnobody——’
Beforehecouldfinishthesentence，Ihadpouredoutaglassofsomeacidulated，coolingdrinkthatwasonthetable，andbroughtittohim。Hedrankitgreedily，butmuttered，asItookawaytheglass，——
`Isupposeyou’reheapingcoalsoffireonmyhead——youthink。’
Notnoticingthisspeech，IaskediftherewasanythingelseI
coulddoforhim。
`Yes；I’llgiveyouanotheropportunityofshewingyourChristianmagnanimity，’sneeredhe：——`setmypillowstraight，——andtheseconfoundedbed-clothes。’Ididso。`There——now，getmeanotherglassofthatslop。’
Icomplied。`Thisisdelightful！isn’tit？’saidhewithamaliciousgrin，asIheldittohislips——youneverhopedforsuchagloriousopportunity？’
`Now，shallIstaywithyou？’saidI，asIreplacedtheglassonthetable——`orwillyoubemorequietifIgo，andsendthenurse？’
`Oh，yes，you’rewondrousgentleandobliging——Butyou’vedrivenmemadwithitall！’respondedhe，withanimpatienttoss。
`I’llleaveyouthen，’saidI，andIwithdrew，anddidnottroublehimwithmypresenceagainthatday，exceptforaminuteortwoatatime，justtoseehowhewasandwhathewanted。
Nextmorning，thedoctororderedhimtobebled；andafterthat，hewasmoresubduedandtranquil。Ipassedhalfthedayinhisroomatdifferentintervals。Mypresencedidnotappeartoagitateorirritatehimasbefore，andheacceptedmyservicesquietly，withoutanybitterremarks——indeedhescarcelyspokeatall，excepttomakeknownhiswants，andhardlythen。Butonthemorrow——thatis，to-day——inproportionasherecoveredfromthestateofexhaustionandstupefaction——hisill-natureappearedtorevive。
`Oh，thissweetrevenge！’criedhe，whenIhadbeendoingallIcouldtomakehimcomfortableandtoremedythecarelessnessofhisnurse。
`Andyoucanenjoyitwithsuchaquietconsciencetoo，becauseit’sallinthewayofduty。’
`ItiswellformethatIamdoingmyduty，’saidI，withabitternessIcouldnotrepress，`foritistheonlycomfortIhave；andthesatisfactionofmyownconscience，itseems，istheonlyrewardIneedlookfor！’
Helookedrathersurprisedattheearnestnessofmymanner。
`Whatrewarddidyoulookfor？’heasked。
`YouwillthinkmealiarifItellyou——ButIdidhopetobenefityou：aswelltobetteryourmind，astoalleviateyourpresentsufferings；butitappearsIamtodoneither——yourownbadspiritwillnotletme。Asfarasyouareconcerned，Ihavesacrificedmyownfeelings，andallthelittleearthlycomfortthatwasleftme，tonopurpose；——andeverylittlethingIdoforyouisascribedtoself-righteousmaliceandrefinedrevenge！’
`It’sallveryfine，Idaresay，’saidhe，eyeingmewithstupidamazement；`andofcourseIoughttobemeltedtotearsofpenitenceandadmirationatthesightofsomuchgenerosityandsuperhumangoodness，——ButyouseeIcan’tman。ageit。However，praydomeallthegoodyoucan，ifyoudoreallyfindanypleasureinit；foryouperceiveIamalmostasmiserablejustnowasyouneedwishtoseeme。Sinceyoucame，Iconfess，Ihavehadbetterattendancethanbefore，forthesewretchesneglectedmeshamefully，andallmyoldfriendsseemtohavefairlyforsakenme。
I’vehadadreadfultimeofit，Iassureyou：IsometimesthoughtIshouldhavedied——doyouthinkthere’sanychance？’
`There’salwaysachanceofdeath；anditisalwayswelltolivewithsuchachanceinview。’
`Yes，yes——Butdoyouthinkthere’sanylikelihoodthatthisillnesswillhaveafataltermination？’
`Icannottell；but，supposingitshould，howareyoupreparedtomeettheevent？’
`Why，thedoctortoldmeIwasn’ttothinkaboutit，forIwassuretogetbetter，ifIstucktohisregimenandprescriptions。’
`Ihopeyoumay，Arthur，butneitherthedoctornorIcanspeakwithcertaintyinsuchacase：thereisinternalinjury，anditisdifficulttoknowtowhatextent。’
`Therenow！youwanttoscaremetodeath。’
