“That’ju，George？”heusedtosay。“Comein。Here’sathing。
Tellhim——Mister——overagain。Haveadrink，George？No！Wiseman！Liss’n。”
Iwasalwaysreadytolisten。AllsortsoffinancialmarvelscameoutoftheHardingham，moreparticularlyduringmyuncle’slastgreatflurry，buttheywerenothingtotheprojectsthatpassedin。Itwasthelittlebrownandgoldroomhesatinusually。HehadhaditredecoratedbyBordinglyandhalfadozenSussexpicturesbyWebsterhungaboutit。Latterlyheworeavelveteenjacketofagolden-browncolourinthisapartmentthatIthinkover-emphasiseditsestheticintention，andhealsoaddedsomegrossChinesebronzes。
Hewas，onthewhole，averyhappymanthroughoutallthatwildlyenterprisingtime。Hemadeand，asIshalltellinitsplace，spentgreatsumsofmoney。Hewasconstantlyinviolentmotion，constantlystimulatedmentallyandphysicallyandrarelytired。
Abouthimwasanatmosphereofimmensedeferencemuchofhiswakinglifewastriumphalandallhisdreams。Idoubtifhehadanydissatisfactionwithhimselfatalluntilthecrashborehimdown。Thingsmusthavegoneveryrapidlywithhim。Ithinkhemusthavebeenveryhappy。
AsIsitherewritingaboutallthesethings，jerkingdownnotesandthrowingthemasideinmyattempttogivesomeliteraryformtothetaleofourpromotions，themarvelofitallcomestomeasifitcameforthefirsttimethesupremeunreasonofit。AttheclimaxofhisBoom，myuncleatthemostsparingestimatemusthavepossessedinsubstanceandcreditabouttwomillionpounds’-worthofpropertytosetoffagainsthisvaguecolossalliabilities，andfromfirsttolasthemusthavehadacontrollinginfluenceinthedirectionofnearlythirtymillions。
Thisirrationalmuddleofacommunityinwhichwelivegavehimthat，paidhimatthatrateforsittinginaroomandschemingandtellingitlies。Forhecreatednothing，heinventednothing，heeconomisednothing。Icannotclaimthatasingleoneofthegreatbusinessesweorganisedaddedanyrealvaluetohumanlifeatall。SeverallikeTono-Bungaywereunmitigatedfraudsbyanyhoneststandard，thegivingofnothingcoatedinadvertisementsformoney。AndthethingstheHardinghamgaveout，Irepeat，werenothingtothethingsthatcamein。Ithinkofthelongprocessionofpeoplewhosatdownbeforeusandpropoundedthisandthat。Nowitwasadeviceforsellingbreadunderafancynameandsoescapingthelawsastoweight——thiswasafterwardsfloatedastheDecorticatedHealth-BreadCompanyandbumpedagainstthelaw——nowitwasanewschemeforstillmorestridentadvertisement，nowitwasastoryofunsuspecteddepositsofminerals，nowacheapandnastysubstituteforthisorthatcommonnecessity，nowthetreacheryofatoowell-informedemployee，anxioustobecomeourpartner。Itwasallputtoustentatively，persuasively。Sometimesonehadalargepinkblusterouspersontryingtocarryusoffourfeetbyhispseudo-boyishfrankness，nowsomedyspepticallyyellowwhisperer，nowsomeearnest，speciallydressedyouthwithaneye-glassandabuttonhole，nowsomehomely-speaking，shrewdManchestermanorsomeScotchmaneagertobeveryclearandfull。
Manycameincouplesortrios，oftenintowofanexplanatorysolicitor。Somewerewhiteandearnest，someflusteredbeyondmeasureattheiropportunity。Someofthembeggedandprayedtobetakenup。Myunclechosewhathewantedandlefttherest。
Hebecameveryautocratictotheseapplicants。
Hefelthecouldmakethem，andtheyfeltsotoo。Hehadbuttosay“No！”andtheyfadedoutofexistence。Hehadbecomeasortofvortextowhichwealthflowedofitsownaccord。Hispossessionsincreasedbyheaps；hisshares，hisleaseholdsandmortgagesanddebentures。
Behindhisfirst-linethingshefounditnecessaryatlast，andsanctionedbyalltheprecincts，tosetupthreegeneraltradingcompanies，theLondonandAfricanInvestmentCompany，theBritishTraders’LoanCompany，andBusinessOrganisationsLimited。ThiswasintheculminatingtimewhenIhadleasttodowithaffairs。
Idon’tsaythatwithanydesiretoexculpatemyself；IadmitI
wasadirectorofallthree，andIwillconfessIwaswillfullyincuriousinthatcapacity。Eachofthesecompaniesendeditsfinancialyearsolventbysellinggreatholdingsofsharestooneorotherofitssisters，andpayingadividendoutoftheproceeds。Isatatthetableandagreed。Thatwasourmethodofequilibriumattheiridescentclimaxofthebubble。
Youperceivenow，however，thenatureoftheservicesforwhichthisfantasticcommunityhavehimunmanageablewealthandpowerandrealrespect。Itwasallamonstrouspaymentforcourageousfiction，agratuityinreturnfortheonerealityofhumanlife——illusion。Wegavethemafeelingofhopeandprofit；wesentatidalwaveofwaterandconfidenceintotheirstrandedaffairs。“WemintFaith，George。”saidmyuncleoneday。
“That’swhatwedo。AndbyJovewegottokeepminting！WebeenmakinghumanconfidenceeversinceIdrovethefirstcorkofTono-Bungay。”
“Coining“wouldhavebeenabetterwordthanminting！Andyet，youknow，inasensehewasright。Civilisationispossibleonlythroughconfidence，sothatwecanbankourmoneyandgounarmedaboutthestreets。Thebankreserveorapolicemankeepingorderinajostlingmultitudeofpeople，areonlyslightlylessimpudentbluffsthanmyuncle’sprospectuses。Theycouldn’tforamoment“makegood“ifthequarterofwhattheyguaranteewasdemandedofthem。Thewholeofthismodernmercantileinvestingcivilisationisindeedsuchstuffasdreamsaremadeof。A
massofpeoplesweltersandtoils，greatrailwaysystemsgrow，citiesarisetotheskiesandspreadwideandfar，minesareopened，factorieshum，foundriesroar，shipsploughtheseas，countriesaresettled；aboutthisbusystrivingworldtherichownersgo，controllingall，enjoyingall，confidentandcreatingtheconfidencethatdrawsusalltogetherintoareluctant，nearlyunconsciousbrotherhood。Iwonderandplanmyengines。
Theflagsflutter，thecrowdscheer，thelegislaturesmeet。Yetitseemstomeindeedattimesthatallthispresentcommercialcivilisationisnomorethanmypooruncle’scareerwritlarge，aswelling，thinningbubbleofassurances；thatitsarithmeticisjustasunsound，itsdividendsasill-advised，itsultimateaimasvagueandforgotten；thatitalldriftsonperhapstosometremendousparalleltohisindividualdisaster。
Well，soitwasweBoomed，andforfouryearsandahalfwelivedalifeofmingledsubstanceandmoonshine。Untilourparticularunsoundnessovertookuswewentaboutinthemostmagnificentofmotor-carsupontangiblehighroads，madeourselvesconspicuousandstatelyinsplendidhouses，atesumptuouslyandhadaperpetualstreamofnotesandmoneytricklingintoourpockets；
hundredsofthousandsofmenandwomenrespectedus，salutedusandgaveustoilandhonour；Iasked，andmyworksheetsrose，myaeroplanesswoopedoutofnothingnesstoscarethedownlandpe-wits；myunclewavedhishandandLadyGroveandallitsassociationsofchivalryandancientpeacewerehis；wavedagain，andarchitectswerebusyplanningthegreatpalaceheneverfinishedatCrestHillandanarmyoffolkmengatheredtodohisbidding，bluemarblecamefromCanada，andtimberfromNewZealand；andbeneathitall，youknow，therewasnothingbutfictitiousvaluesasevanescentasrainbowgold。
IpasstheHardinghameverandagainandglanceasidethroughthegreatarchwayatthefountainandtheferns，andthinkofthoserecedingdayswhenIwassonearthecentreofoureddyofgreedandenterprise。Iseeagainmyuncle’sface，whiteandintent，andhearhimdiscourse，hearhimmakeconsciouslyNapoleonicdecisions，“grip“hisnettles，puthis“fingeronthespot。”
“bluff。”say“snap。”Hebecameparticularlyaddictedtothelastidiom。Towardstheendeveryconceivableacttooktheformofsaying“snap！”
Theoddfishthatcametous！AndamongotherscameGordon-Nasmyth，thatqueerblendofromanceandillegalitywhowasdestinedtodragmeintothemostirrelevantadventureinmylifetheMordetIslandaffair；andleaveme，astheysay，withblooduponmyhands。Itisremarkablehowlittleittroublesmyconscienceandhowmuchitstirsmyimagination，thatparticularmemoryofthelifeItook。ThestoryofMordetIslandhasbeentoldinagovernmentreportandtoldallwrong；therearestillexcellentreasonsforleavingitwronginplaces，buttheliveliestappealsofdiscretionforbidmyleavingitoutaltogether。
I’vestillthevividestmemoryofGordon-Nasmyth’sappearanceintheinnersanctum，alank，sunburntpersonintweedswithayellow-brownhatchetfaceandonefadedblueeye——theotherwasaclosedandsunkenlid——andhowhetolduswithastiffaffectationofeasehisincrediblestoryofthisgreatheapofquapthatlayabandonedorundiscoveredonthebeachbehindMordet’sIslandamongwhitedeadmangrovesandtheblackoozeofbrackishwater。
“What’squap？”saidmyuncleonthefourthrepetitionoftheword。
“Theycallitquap，orquab，orquabb。”saidGordon-Nasmyth；“butourrelationsweren’tfriendlyenoughtogettheaccentright。
Buttherethestuffisforthetaking。Theydon’tknowaboutit。
Nobodyknowsaboutit。Igotdowntothedamnedplaceinacanoealone。Theboyswouldn’tcome。Ipretendedtobebotanising。”
Tobeginwith，Gordon-Nasmythwasinclinedtobedramatic。
“Lookhere。”hesaidwhenhefirstcamein，shuttingthedoorrathercarefullybehindhimashespoke，“doyoutwomen——yesorno——wanttoputupsixthousand——for——acleargoodchanceoffifteenhundredpercent。onyourmoneyinayear？”
“We’realwaysgettingchanceslikethat。”saidmyuncle，cockinghiscigaroffensively，wipinghisglassesandtiltinghischairback。“Westicktoasafetwenty。”
Gordon-Nasmyth’squicktempershowedinaslightstiffeningofhisattitude。
“Don’tyoubelievehim。”saidI，gettingupbeforehecouldreply。“You’redifferent，andIknowyourbooks。We’reverygladyou’vecometous。Confoundit，uncle！ItsGordon-Nasmyth！
Sitdown。Whatisit？Minerals？”
“Quap。”saidGordon-Nasmyth，fixinghiseyeonme，“inheaps。”
“Inheaps。”saidmyunclesoftly，withhisglassesveryoblique。
