第34章

’Everywoman，’shesays，’thatiswithchildhasafather forit，’andwhetherthatfatherwasahusbandornohusband， wasnobusinessofhers；herbusinesswastoassistmeinmy presentcircumstances，whetherIhadahusbandorno。 ’For， madam，’saysshe，’tohaveahusbandthatcannotappear，is tohavenohusbandinthesenseofthecase；and，therefore， whetheryouareawifeoramistressisallonetome。’ Ifoundpresently，thatwhetherIwasawhoreorawife，Iwas topassforawhorehere，soIletthatgo。 Itoldheritwas true，asshesaid，butthat，however，ifImusttellhermycase， Imusttellitherasitwas；soIrelatedittoherasshortasI could，andIconcludedittoherthus。 ’Itroubleyouwithall this，madam，’saidI，’notthat，asyousaidbefore，itismuch tothepurposeinyouraffair，butthisistothepurpose，namely， thatIamnotinanypainaboutbeingseen，orbeingpublicor concealed，for’tisperfectlyindifferenttome；butmydifficulty is，thatIhavenoacquaintanceinthispartofthenation。’ ’Iunderstandyou，madam’saysshe；’youhavenosecurityto bringtopreventtheparishimpertinencesusualinsuchcases， andperhaps，’saysshe，’donotknowverywellhowtodispose ofthechildwhenitcomes。’ ’Thelast，’saysI，’isnotsomuch myconcernasthefirst。’ ’Well，madam，’answeredthemidwife， ’dareyouputyourselfintomyhands？ Iliveinsuchaplace； thoughIdonotinquireafteryou，youmayinquireafterme。 MynameisB——；Iliveinsuchastreet’——namingthestreet——’ atthesignoftheCradle。 Myprofessionisamidwife，andI havemanyladiesthatcometomyhousetoliein。 Ihavegiven securitytotheparishingeneraltermstosecurethemfromany chargefromwhatsoevershallcomeintotheworldundermy roof。 Ihavebutonequestiontoaskinthewholeaffair，madam，’ saysshe，’andifthatbeansweredyoushallbeentirelyeasyfor alltherest。’ Ipresentlyunderstoodwhatshemeant，andtoldher，’Madam， IbelieveIunderstandyou。 IthankGod，thoughIwantfriends inthispartoftheworld，Idonotwantmoney，sofarasmay benecessary，thoughIdonotaboundinthatneither’: thisI addedbecauseIwouldnotmakeherexpectgreatthings。 ’Well，madam，’saysshe，’thatisthethingindeed，without whichnothingcanbedoneinthesecases；andyet，’saysshe， ’youshallseethatIwillnotimposeuponyou，orofferanything thatisunkindtoyou，andifyoudesireit，youshallknow everythingbeforehand，thatyoumaysuityourselftothe occasion，andbeneithercostlyorsparingasyouseefit。’ Itoldhersheseemedtobesoperfectlysensibleofmycondition， thatIhadnothingtoaskofherbutthis，thatasIhadtoldher thatIhadmoneysufficient，butnotagreatquantity，shewould orderitsothatImightbeataslittlesuperfluouschargeas possible。 Sherepliedthatshewouldbringinanaccountoftheexpenses ofitintwoorthreeshapes，andlikeabilloffare，Ishould chooseasIpleased；andIdesiredhertodoso。 Thenextdayshebroughtit，andthecopyofherthreebills wasafollows: Forthreemonths’lodginginherhouse，including mydiet，at10s。aweek Foranurseforthemonth，anduseofchildbed Foraministertochristenthechild，andtothe godfathersandclerkForasupperatthechristeningifIhadfivefriends Forherfeesasamidwife，andthetakingoffthe troubleoftheparish Tohermaidservantattending。 Thiswasthefirstbill；thesecondwasthesameterms Forthreemonths’lodginganddiet，etc。，at Foranurseforthemonth，andtheuseoflinen Fortheministertochristenthechild，etc。，as Forsupperandforsweetmeats Forherfeesasabove Foraservant-maid Thiswasthesecond-ratebill；thethird，shesaid，wasfor adegreehigher，andwhenthefatherorfriendsappeared Forthreemonths’lodginganddiet，havingtwo roomsandagarretforaservant Foranurseforthemonth，andthefinestsuit ofchildbedlinen Fortheministertochristenthechild，etc。 Forasuper，thegentlementosendinthe Formyfees，etc。 Themaid，besidestheirownmaid，only Ilookeduponallthreebills，andsmiled，andtoldherIdidnot seebutthatshewasveryreasonableinherdemands，allthings considered，andforthatIdidnotdoubtbuther accommodations weregood。 ShetoldmeIshouldbejudgeofthatwhenIsawthem。 herIwassorrytotellherthatIgearedImustbeherlowest- ratedcustomer。 ’Andperhaps，madam，’saidI，’youwillmake methelesswelcomeuponthataccount。’ ’No，notatall，’said she；’forwhereIhaveoneofthethirdsortIhavetwoofthe second，andfourtooneofthefirst，andIgetasmuchbythem inproportionasbyany；butifyoudoubtmycareofyou，Iwill allowanyfriendyouhavetooverlookandseeifyouarewell waitedonorno。’ Thensheexplainedtheparticularsofherbill。 ’Inthefirstplace， madam，’saidshe，’Iwouldhaveyouobservethathereisthree months’keeping；youarebuttenshillingsaweek；Iundertake tosayyouwillnotcomplainofmytable。 Isuppose，’saysshe， ’youdonotlivecheaperwhereyouarenow？’ ’No，indeed，’ saidI，’notsocheap，forIgivesixshillingsperweekformy chamber，andfindmyowndietaswellasIcan，whichcosts meagreatdealmore。’ ’Then，madam，’saysshe，’ifthechildshouldnotlive，orshould bedead-born，asyouknowsometimeshappens，thenthereis theminister’sarticlesaved；andifyouhavenofriendstocome toyou，youmaysavetheexpenseofasupper；sothattakethose articlesout，madam，’saysshe，’yourlyinginwillnotcostyou above#5，3s。inallmorethanyourordinarychargeof living。’ ThiswasthemostreasonablethingthatIeverheardof；soI smiled，andtoldherIwouldcomeandbehercustomer；butI toldheralso，thatasIhadtwomonthsandmoretodo，Imight perhapsbeobligedtostaylongerwithherthanthreemonths， anddesiredtoknowifshewouldnotbeobligedtoremoveme beforeitwasproper。 No，shesaid；herhousewaslarge，and besides，sheneverputanybodytoremove，thathadlainin，till theywerewillingtogo；andifshehadmoreladiesoffered，she wasnotsoill-belovedamongherneighboursbutshecould provideaccommodationsfortwenty，iftherewasoccasion。 Ifoundshewasaneminentladyinherway；and，inshort，I agreedtoputmyselfintoherhands，andpromisedher。 She thentalkedofotherthings，lookedaboutintomyaccommodations whereIwas，foundfaultwithmywantingattendanceand conveniences，andthatIshouldnotbeusedsoatherhouse。 ItoldherIwasshyofspeaking，forthewomanofthehouse lookedstranger，oratleastIthoughtso，sinceIhadbeenill， becauseIwaswithchild；andIwasafraidshewouldputsome affrontorotheruponme，supposingthatIhadbeenableto givebutaslightaccountofmyself。 ’Ohdear，’saidshe，’herladyshipisnostrangertothesethings； shehastriedtoentertainladiesinyourconditionseveraltimes， butshecouldnotsecuretheparish；andbesides，sheisnotsucha niceladyasyoutakehertobe；however，sinceyouarea-going， youshallnotmeddlewithher，butI’llseeyouarealittlebetter lookedafterwhileyouareherethanIthinkyouare，anditshall notcostyouthemoreneither。’ Ididnotunderstandheratall；however，Ithankedher，and weparted。 Thenextmorningshesentmeachickenroasted andhot，andapintbottleofsherry，andorderedthemaidto tellmethatshewastowaitonmeeverydayaslongasIstayed there。 Thiswassurprisinglygoodandkind，andIaccepteditvery willingly。 Atnightshesenttomeagain，toknowifIwanted anything，andhowIdid，andtoorderthemaidtocometoher inthemorningwithmydinner。 Themaid hadorderstomake mesomechocolateinthemorningbeforeshecameaway，and didso，andatnoonshebroughtmethesweetbreadofabreast ofveal，whole，andadishofsoupformydinner；andafterthis mannershenursedmeupatadistance，sothatIwasmightily wellpleased，andquicklywell，forindeedmydejectionsbefore weretheprincipalpartofmyillness。 Iexpected，asisusuallythecaseamongsuchpeople，thatthe servantshesentmewouldhavebeensomeimprudentbrazen wenchofDruryLanebreeding，andIwasveryuneasyathaving herwithmeuponthataccount；soIwouldnotletherliein thathousethefirstnightbyanymeans，buthadmyeyesabout measnarrowlyasifshehadbeenapublicthief。 Mygentlewomanguessedpresentlywhatwasthematter，and sentherbackwithashortnote，thatImightdependuponthe honestyofhermaid；thatshewouldbeanswerableforherupon allaccounts；andthatshetooknoservantsintoherhouse withoutverygoodsecurityfortheirfidelity。 Iwasthenperfectly easy；andindeedthemaid’sbehaviourspokeforitself，fora modester，quieter，soberergirlnevercameintoanybody’sfamily， andIfoundhersoafterwards。 AssoonasIwaswellenoughtogoabroad，Iwentwiththe maidtoseethehouse，andtoseetheapartmentIwastohave； andeverythingwassohandsomeandsocleanandwell，that， inshort，Ihadnothingtosay，butwaswonderfullypleased andsatisfiedwithwhatIhadmetwith，which，considering themelancholycircumstancesIwasin，wasfarbeyondwhat Ilookedfor。