第8章

类别:其他 作者:Virginia Woolf字数:4959更新时间:18/12/27 08:07:33
Voiceswereheardattheendofthecorridor。Mrs。Ambrosewasspeakinglow;WilliamPepperwasremarkinginhisdefiniteandratheracidvoice,“ThatisthetypeofladywithwhomIfindmyselfdistinctlyoutofsympathy。She——“ ButneitherRichardnorClarissaprofitedbytheverdict,fordirectlyitseemedlikelythattheywouldoverhear,Richardcrackledasheetofpaper。 “Ioftenwonder,“Clarissamusedinbed,overthelittlewhitevolumeofPascalwhichwentwithhereverywhere,“whetheritisreallygoodforawomantolivewithamanwhoismorallyhersuperior,asRichardismine。Itmakesonesodependent。IsupposeIfeelforhimwhatmymotherandwomenofhergenerationfeltforChrist。 Itjustshowsthatonecan’tdowithout_something_。“Shethenfellintoasleep,whichwasasusualextremelysoundandrefreshing,butvisitedbyfantasticdreamsofgreatGreeklettersstalkingroundtheroom,whenshewokeupandlaughedtoherself,rememberingwhereshewasandthattheGreekletterswererealpeople,lyingasleepnotmanyyardsaway。Then,thinkingoftheblackseaoutsidetossingbeneaththemoon,sheshuddered,andthoughtofherhusbandandtheothersascompanionsonthevoyage。 Thedreamswerenotconfinedtoherindeed,butwentfromonebraintoanother。Theyalldreamtofeachotherthatnight,aswasnatural,consideringhowthinthepartitionswerebetweenthem,andhowstrangelytheyhadbeenliftedofftheearthtositnexteachotherinmid-ocean,andseeeverydetailofeachother’sfaces,andhearwhatevertheychancedtosay。 NextmorningClarissawasupbeforeanyoneelse。Shedressed,andwasoutondeck,breathingthefreshairofacalmmorning,and,makingthecircuitoftheshipforthesecondtime,sheranstraightintotheleanpersonofMr。Grice,thesteward。 Sheapologised,andatthesametimeaskedhimtoenlightenher: whatwerethoseshinybrassstandsfor,halfglassonthetop? Shehadbeenwondering,andcouldnotguess。Whenhehaddoneexplaining,shecriedenthusiastically: “Idothinkthattobeasailormustbethefinestthingintheworld!“ “Andwhatd’youknowaboutit?“saidMr。Grice,kindlinginastrangemanner。“Pardonme。WhatdoesanymanorwomanbroughtupinEnglandknowaboutthesea?Theyprofesstoknow;buttheydon’t。“ Thebitternesswithwhichhespokewasominousofwhatwastocome。 Heledherofftohisownquarters,and,sittingontheedgeofabrass-boundtable,lookinguncommonlylikeasea-gull,withherwhitetaperingbodyandthinalertface,Mrs。Dallowayhadtolistentothetiradeofafanaticalman。Didsherealise,tobeginwith,whataverysmallpartoftheworldthelandwas? Howpeaceful,howbeautiful,howbenignantincomparisonthesea? ThedeepwaterscouldsustainEuropeunaidedifeveryearthlyanimaldiedoftheplagueto-morrow。Mr。Gricerecalleddreadfulsightswhichhehadseenintherichestcityoftheworld——menandwomenstandinginlinehourafterhourtoreceiveamugofgreasysoup。 “AndIthoughtofthegoodfleshdownherewaitingandaskingtobecaught。I’mnotexactlyaProtestant,andI’mnotaCatholic,butIcouldalmostprayforthedaysofpoperytocomeagain—— becauseofthefasts。“ Ashetalkedhekeptopeningdrawersandmovinglittleglassjars。 Herewerethetreasureswhichthegreatoceanhadbestoweduponhim—— palefishingreenishliquids,blobsofjellywithstreamingtresses,fishwithlightsintheirheads,theylivedsodeep。 “Theyhaveswumaboutamongbones,“Clarissasighed。 “You’rethinkingofShakespeare,“saidMr。Grice,andtakingdownacopyfromashelfwelllinedwithbooks,recitedinanemphaticnasalvoice: Fullfathomfivethyfatherlies,“Agrandfellow,Shakespeare,“hesaid,replacingthevolume。 Clarissawassogladtohearhimsayso。 “Whichisyourfavouriteplay?Iwonderifit’sthesameasmine?“ “_HenrytheFifth_,“saidMr。Grice。 “Joy!“criedClarissa。“Itis!“ _Hamlet_waswhatyoumightcalltoointrospectiveforMr。Grice,thesonnetstoopassionate;HenrytheFifthwastohimthemodelofanEnglishgentleman。ButhisfavouritereadingwasHuxley,HerbertSpencer,andHenryGeorge;whileEmersonandThomasHardyhereadforrelaxation。HewasgivingMrs。DallowayhisviewsuponthepresentstateofEnglandwhenthebreakfastbellrungsoimperiouslythatshehadtotearherselfaway,promisingtocomebackandbeshownhissea-weeds。 Theparty,whichhadseemedsooddtoherthenightbefore,wasalreadygatheredroundthetable,stillundertheinfluenceofsleep,andthereforeuncommunicative,butherentrancesentalittleflutterlikeabreathofairthroughthemall。 “I’vehadthemostinterestingtalkofmylife!“sheexclaimed,takingherseatbesideWilloughby。“D’yourealisethatoneofyourmenisaphilosopherandapoet?“ “Averyinterestingfellow——that’swhatIalwayssay,“saidWilloughby,distinguishingMr。Grice。“ThoughRachelfindshimabore。“ “He’saborewhenhetalksaboutcurrents,“saidRachel。Hereyeswerefullofsleep,butMrs。Dallowaystillseemedtoherwonderful。 “I’venevermetaboreyet!“saidClarissa。 “AndIshouldsaytheworldwasfullofthem!“exclaimedHelen。 Butherbeauty,whichwasradiantinthemorninglight,tookthecontrarinessfromherwords。 “Iagreethatit’stheworstonecanpossiblysayofanyone,“ saidClarissa。“Howmuchratheronewouldbeamurdererthanabore!“ sheadded,withherusualairofsayingsomethingprofound。 “Onecanfancylikingamurderer。It’sthesamewithdogs。 Somedogsareawfulbores,poordears。“ IthappenedthatRichardwassittingnexttoRachel。Shewascuriouslyconsciousofhispresenceandappearance——hiswell-cutclothes,hiscracklingshirt-front,hiscuffswithblueringsroundthem,andthesquare-tipped,verycleanfingerswiththeredstoneonthelittlefingerofthelefthand。 “Wehadadogwhowasaboreandknewit,“hesaid,addressingherincool,easytones。“HewasaSkyeterrier,oneofthoselongchaps,withlittlefeetpokingoutfromtheirhairlike—— likecaterpillars——no,likesofasIshouldsay。Well,wehadanotherdogatthesametime,ablackbriskanimal——aSchipperke,Ithink,youcallthem。Youcan’timagineagreatercontrast。TheSkyesoslowanddeliberate,lookingupatyoulikesomeoldgentlemanintheclub,asmuchastosay,“Youdon’treallymeanit,doyou?“ andtheSchipperkeasquickasaknife。IlikedtheSkyebest,Imustconfess。Therewassomethingpatheticabouthim。“ Thestoryseemedtohavenoclimax。 “Whathappenedtohim?“Rachelasked。 “That’saverysadstory,“saidRichard,loweringhisvoiceandpeelinganapple。“Hefollowedmywifeinthecaronedayandgotrunoverbyabruteofacyclist。“ “Washekilled?“askedRachel。 ButClarissaatherendofthetablehadoverheard。 “Don’ttalkofit!“shecried。“It’sathingIcan’tbeartothinkoftothisday。“ Surelythetearsstoodinhereyes? “That’sthepainfulthingaboutpets,“saidMr。Dalloway;“theydie。 ThefirstsorrowIcanrememberwasforthedeathofadormouse。 IregrettosaythatIsatuponit。Still,thatdidn’tmakeoneanythelesssorry。HereliestheduckthatSamuelJohnsonsaton,eh? Iwasbigformyage。“ “Thenwehadcanaries,“hecontinued,“apairofring-doves,alemur,andatonetimeamartin。“ “Didyouliveinthecountry?“Rachelaskedhim。 “Welivedinthecountryforsixmonthsoftheyear。WhenIsay’we’Imeanfoursisters,abrother,andmyself。There’snothinglikecomingofalargefamily。Sistersparticularlyaredelightful。“ “Dick,youwerehorriblyspoilt!“criedClarissaacrossthetable。 “No,no。Appreciated,“saidRichard。 Rachelhadotherquestionsonthetipofhertongue;orratheroneenormousquestion,whichshedidnotintheleastknowhowtoputintowords。Thetalkappearedtooairytoadmitofit。 “Pleasetellme——everything。“Thatwaswhatshewantedtosay。 Hehaddrawnapartonelittlechinkandshowedastonishingtreasures。 Itseemedtoherincrediblethatamanlikethatshouldbewillingtotalktoher。Hehadsistersandpets,andoncelivedinthecountry。 Shestirredhertearoundandround;thebubbleswhichswamandclusteredinthecupseemedtoherliketheunionoftheirminds。 Thetalkmeanwhileracedpasther,andwhenRichardsuddenlystatedinajoculartoneofvoice,“I’msureMissVinrace,now,hassecretleaningstowardsCatholicism,“shehadnoideawhattoanswer,andHelencouldnothelplaughingatthestartshegave。 However,breakfastwasoverandMrs。Dallowaywasrising。 “Ialwaysthinkreligion’slikecollectingbeetles,“shesaid,summingupthediscussionasshewentupthestairswithHelen。 “Onepersonhasapassionforblackbeetles;anotherhasn’t;it’snogoodarguingaboutit。What’s_your_blackbeetlenow?“ “Isupposeit’smychildren,“saidHelen。 “Ah——that’sdifferent,“Clarissabreathed。“Dotellme。 Youhaveaboy,haven’tyou?Isn’titdetestable,leavingthem?“ Itwasasthoughablueshadowhadfallenacrossapool。 Theireyesbecamedeeper,andtheirvoicesmorecordial。 Insteadofjoiningthemastheybegantopacethedeck,Rachelwasindignantwiththeprosperousmatrons,whomadeherfeeloutsidetheirworldandmotherless,andturningback,sheleftthemabruptly。 Sheslammedthedoorofherroom,andpulledouthermusic。 Itwasalloldmusic——BachandBeethoven,MozartandPurcell—— thepagesyellow,theengravingroughtothefinger。Inthreeminutesshewasdeepinaverydifficult,veryclassicalfugueinA,andoverherfacecameaqueerremoteimpersonalexpressionofcompleteabsorptionandanxioussatisfaction。Nowshestumbled; nowshefalteredandhadtoplaythesamebartwiceover;butaninvisiblelineseemedtostringthenotestogether,fromwhichroseashape,abuilding。Shewassofarabsorbedinthiswork,foritwasreallydifficulttofindhowallthesesoundsshouldstandtogether,anddrewuponthewholeofherfaculties,thatsheneverheardaknockatthedoor。Itwasburstimpulsivelyopen,andMrs。Dallowaystoodintheroomleavingthedooropen,sothatastripofthewhitedeckandoftheblueseaappearedthroughtheopening。TheshapeoftheBachfuguecrashedtotheground。 “Don’tletmeinterrupt,“Clarissaimplored。“Iheardyouplaying,andIcouldn’tresist。IadoreBach!“ Rachelflushedandfumbledherfingersinherlap。Shestoodupawkwardly。 “It’stoodifficult,“shesaid。 “Butyouwereplayingquitesplendidly!Ioughttohavestayedoutside。“ “No,“saidRachel。 Sheslid_Cowper’s__Letters_and_Wuthering__Heights_outofthearm-chair,sothatClarissawasinvitedtositthere。 “Whatadearlittleroom!“shesaid,lookinground。 “Oh,_Cowper’s__Letters>!“I’veneverreadthem。Aretheynice?“ “Ratherdull,“saidRachel。 “Hewroteawfullywell,didn’the?“saidClarissa;“——ifonelikesthatkindofthing——finishedhissentencesandallthat。 _Wuthering__Heights_!Ah——that’smoreinmyline。Ireallycouldn’texistwithouttheBrontes!Don’tyoulovethem?Still,onthewhole,I’dratherlivewithoutthemthanwithoutJaneAusten。“ Lightlyandatrandomthoughshespoke,hermannerconveyedanextraordinarydegreeofsympathyanddesiretobefriend。 “JaneAusten?Idon’tlikeJaneAusten,“saidRachel。 “Youmonster!“Clarissaexclaimed。“Icanonlyjustforgiveyou。