第19章

类别:其他 作者:Virginia Woolf字数:5152更新时间:18/12/27 08:07:33
“Alittlesilvergoesalongwayinthiscountry,“shechuckled。 ShesentSusanbacktofetchanothercup。 “Theyhavesuchexcellentbiscuitshere,“shesaid,contemplatingaplateful。“Notsweetbiscuits,whichIdon’tlike——drybiscuits……Haveyoubeensketching?“ “Oh,I’vedonetwoorthreelittledaubs,“saidMrs。Elliot,speakingratherlouderthanusual。“Butit’ssodifficultafterOxfordshire,wheretherearesomanytrees。Thelight’ssostronghere。 Somepeopleadmireit,Iknow,butIfinditveryfatiguing。“ “Ireallydon’tneedcooking,Susan,“saidMrs。Paley,whenherniecereturned。“Imusttroubleyoutomoveme。“Everythinghadtobemoved。Finallytheoldladywasplacedsothatthelightwaveredoverher,asthoughshewereafishinanet。Susanpouredouttea,andwasjustremarkingthattheywerehavinghotweatherinWiltshiretoo,whenMr。Venningaskedwhetherhemightjointhem。 “It’ssonicetofindayoungmanwhodoesn’tdespisetea,“ saidMrs。Paley,regaininghergoodhumour。“Oneofmynephewstheotherdayaskedforaglassofsherry——atfiveo’clock!I toldhimhecouldgetitatthepublichouseroundthecorner,butnotinmydrawingroom。“ “I’drathergowithoutlunchthantea,“saidMr。Venning。 “That’snotstrictlytrue。Iwantboth。“ Mr。Venningwasadarkyoungman,aboutthirty-twoyearsofage,veryslapdashandconfidentinhismanner,althoughatthismomentobviouslyalittleexcited。HisfriendMr。Perrottwasabarrister,andasMr。PerrottrefusedtogoanywherewithoutMr。Venningitwasnecessary,whenMr。PerrottcametoSantaMarinaaboutaCompany,forMr。Venningtocometoo。Hewasabarristeralso,butheloathedaprofessionwhichkepthimindoorsoverbooks,anddirectlyhiswidowedmotherdiedhewasgoing,soheconfidedtoSusan,totakeupflyingseriously,andbecomepartnerinalargebusinessformakingaeroplanes。Thetalkrambledon。Itdealt,ofcourse,withthebeautiesandsingularitiesoftheplace,thestreets,thepeople,andthequantitiesofunownedyellowdogs。 “Don’tyouthinkitdreadfullycruelthewaytheytreatdogsinthiscountry?“askedMrs。Paley。 “I’dhave’emallshot,“saidMr。Venning。 “Oh,butthedarlingpuppies,“saidSusan。 “Jollylittlechaps,“saidMr。Venning。“Lookhere,you’vegotnothingtoeat。“AgreatwedgeofcakewashandedSusanonthepointofatremblingknife。Herhandtrembledtooasshetookit。 “Ihavesuchadeardogathome,“saidMrs。Elliot。 “Myparrotcan’tstanddogs,“saidMrs。Paley,withtheairofonemakingaconfidence。“Ialwayssuspectthathe(orshe) wasteasedbyadogwhenIwasabroad。“ “Youdidn’tgetfarthismorning,MissWarrington,“saidMr。Venning。 “Itwashot,“sheanswered。Theirconversationbecameprivate,owingtoMrs。Paley’sdeafnessandthelongsadhistorywhichMrs。Elliothadembarkeduponofawire-hairedterrier,whitewithjustoneblackspot,belongingtoanuncleofhers,whichhadcommittedsuicide。“Animalsdocommitsuicide,“ shesighed,asifsheassertedapainfulfact。 “Couldn’tweexplorethetownthisevening?“Mr。Venningsuggested。 “Myaunt——“Susanbegan。 “Youdeserveaholiday,“hesaid。“You’realwaysdoingthingsforotherpeople。“ “Butthat’smylife,“shesaid,undercoverofrefillingtheteapot。 “That’snoone’slife,“hereturned,“noyoungperson’s。You’llcome?“ “Ishouldliketocome,“shemurmured。 AtthismomentMrs。Elliotlookedupandexclaimed,“Oh,Hugh! He’sbringingsomeone,“sheadded。 “Hewouldlikesometea,“saidMrs。Paley。“Susan,runandgetsomecups——therearethetwoyoungmen。“ “We’rethirstingfortea,“saidMr。Elliot。“YouknowMr。Ambrose,Hilda?Wemetonthehill。“ “Hedraggedmein,“saidRidley,“orIshouldhavebeenashamed。 I’mdustyanddirtyanddisagreeable。“Hepointedtohisbootswhichwerewhitewithdust,whileadejectedflowerdroopinginhisbuttonhole,likeanexhaustedanimaloveragate,addedtotheeffectoflengthanduntidiness。Hewasintroducedtotheothers。 Mr。HewetandMr。Hirstbroughtchairs,andteabeganagain,Susanpouringcascadesofwaterfrompottopot,alwayscheerfully,andwiththecompetenceoflonguse。 “Mywife’sbrother,“RidleyexplainedtoHilda,whomhefailedtoremember,“hasahousehere,whichhehaslentus。 IwassittingonarockthinkingofnothingatallwhenElliotstarteduplikeafairyinapantomime。“ “Ourchickengotintothesalt,“HewetsaiddolefullytoSusan。 “Norisittruethatbananasincludemoistureaswellassustenance。 Hirstwasalreadydrinking。 “We’vebeencursingyou,“saidRidleyinanswertoMrs。Elliot’skindenquiriesabouthiswife。“Youtouristseatupalltheeggs,Helentellsme。That’saneye-soretoo“——henoddedhisheadatthehotel。“Disgustingluxury,Icallit。Welivewithpigsinthedrawing-room。“ “Thefoodisnotatallwhatitoughttobe,consideringtheprice,“ saidMrs。Paleyseriously。“Butunlessonegoestoahotelwhereisonetogoto?“ “Stayathome,“saidRidley。“IoftenwishIhad!Everyoneoughttostayathome。But,ofcourse,theywon’t。“ Mrs。PaleyconceivedacertaingrudgeagainstRidley,whoseemedtobecriticisingherhabitsafteranacquaintanceoffiveminutes。 “Ibelieveinforeigntravelmyself,“shestated,“ifoneknowsone’snativeland,whichIthinkIcanhonestlysayIdo。IshouldnotallowanyonetotraveluntiltheyhadvisitedKentandDorsetshire—— Kentforthehops,andDorsetshireforitsoldstonecottages。 Thereisnothingtocomparewiththemhere。“ “Yes——Ialwaysthinkthatsomepeopleliketheflatandotherpeoplelikethedowns,“saidMrs。Elliotrathervaguely。 Hirst,whohadbeeneatinganddrinkingwithoutinterruption,nowlitacigarette,andobserved,“Oh,butwe’reallagreedbythistimethatnature’samistake。She’seitherveryugly,appallinglyuncomfortable,orabsolutelyterrifying。Idon’tknowwhichalarmsmemost——acoworatree。Ioncemetacowinafieldbynight。 Thecreaturelookedatme。Iassureyouitturnedmyhairgrey。 It’sadisgracethattheanimalsshouldbeallowedtogoatlarge。“ “Andwhatdidthecowthinkof_him_?“VenningmumbledtoSusan,whoimmediatelydecidedinherownmindthatMr。Hirstwasadreadfulyoungman,andthatalthoughhehadsuchanairofbeingcleverheprobablywasn’tascleverasArthur,inthewaysthatreallymatter。 “Wasn’titWildewhodiscoveredthefactthatnaturemakesnoallowanceforhip-bones?“enquiredHughlingElliot。HeknewbythistimeexactlywhatscholarshipsanddistinctionHirstenjoyed,andhadformedaveryhighopinionofhiscapacities。 ButHirstmerelydrewhislipstogetherverytightlyandmadenoreply。 Ridleyconjecturedthatitwasnowpermissibleforhimtotakehisleave。PolitenessrequiredhimtothankMrs。Elliotforhistea,andtoadd,withawaveofhishand,“Youmustcomeupandseeus。“ ThewaveincludedbothHirstandHewet,andHewetanswered,“Ishouldlikeitimmensely。“ Thepartybrokeup,andSusan,whohadneverfeltsohappyinherlife,wasjustabouttostartforherwalkinthetownwithArthur,whenMrs。Paleybeckonedherback。ShecouldnotunderstandfromthebookhowDoubleDemonpatienceisplayed;andsuggestedthatiftheysatdownandworkeditouttogetheritwouldfillupthetimenicelybeforedinner。 AmongthepromiseswhichMrs。Ambrosehadmadehernieceshouldshestaywasaroomcutofffromtherestofthehouse,large,private—— aroominwhichshecouldplay,read,think,defytheworld,afortressaswellasasanctuary。Rooms,sheknew,becamemorelikeworldsthanroomsattheageoftwenty-four。Herjudgmentwascorrect,andwhensheshutthedoorRachelenteredanenchantedplace,wherethepoetssangandthingsfellintotheirrightproportions。 Somedaysafterthevisionofthehotelbynightshewassittingalone,sunkinanarm-chair,readingabrightly-coveredredvolumeletteredontheback_Works__of__Henrik__Ibsen_。Musicwasopenonthepiano,andbooksofmusicroseintwojaggedpillarsonthefloor; butforthemomentmusicwasdeserted。 Farfromlookingboredorabsent-minded,hereyeswereconcentratedalmoststernlyuponthepage,andfromherbreathing,whichwasslowbutrepressed,itcouldbeseenthatherwholebodywasconstrainedbytheworkingofhermind。Atlastsheshutthebooksharply,layback,anddrewadeepbreath,expressiveofthewonderwhichalwaysmarksthetransitionfromtheimaginaryworldtotherealworld。 “WhatIwanttoknow,“shesaidaloud,“isthis:Whatisthetruth? What’sthetruthofitall?“Shewasspeakingpartlyasherself,andpartlyastheheroineoftheplayshehadjustread。 Thelandscapeoutside,becauseshehadseennothingbutprintforthespaceoftwohours,nowappearedamazinglysolidandclear,butalthoughthereweremenonthehillwashingthetrunksofolivetreeswithawhiteliquid,forthemomentsheherselfwasthemostvividthinginit——anheroicstatueinthemiddleoftheforeground,dominatingtheview。Ibsen’splaysalwaysleftherinthatcondition。 Sheactedthemfordaysatatime,greatlytoHelen’samusement; andthenitwouldbeMeredith’sturnandshebecameDianaoftheCrossways。ButHelenwasawarethatitwasnotallacting,andthatsomesortofchangewastakingplaceinthehumanbeing。 WhenRachelbecametiredoftherigidityofherposeonthebackofthechair,sheturnedround,slidcomfortablydownintoit,andgazedoutoverthefurniturethroughthewindowoppositewhichopenedonthegarden。(HermindwanderedawayfromNora,butshewentonthinkingofthingsthatthebooksuggestedtoher,ofwomenandlife。) Duringthethreemonthsshehadbeenhereshehadmadeupconsiderably,asHelenmeantsheshould,fortimespentininterminablewalksroundshelteredgardens,andthehouseholdgossipofheraunts。 ButMrs。Ambrosewouldhavebeenthefirsttodisclaimanyinfluence,orindeedanybeliefthattoinfluencewaswithinherpower。 Shesawherlessshy,andlessserious,whichwasalltothegood,andtheviolentleapsandtheinterminablemazeswhichhadledtothatresultwereusuallynotevenguessedatbyher。Talkwasthemedicineshetrustedto,talkabouteverything,talkthatwasfree,unguarded,andascandidasahabitoftalkingwithmenmadenaturalinherowncase。Nordidsheencouragethosehabitsofunselfishnessandamiabilityfoundeduponinsinceritywhichareputatsohighavalueinmixedhouseholdsofmenandwomen。 ShedesiredthatRachelshouldthink,andforthisreasonofferedbooksanddiscouragedtooentireadependenceuponBachandBeethovenandWagner。ButwhenMrs。AmbrosewouldhavesuggestedDefoe,Maupassant,orsomespaciouschronicleoffamilylife,Rachelchosemodernbooks,booksinshinyyellowcovers,bookswithagreatdealofgildingontheback,whichweretokensinheraunt’seyesofharshwranglinganddisputesaboutfactswhichhadnosuchimportanceasthemodernsclaimedforthem。Butshedidnotinterfere。 Rachelreadwhatshechose,readingwiththecuriousliteralnessofonetowhomwrittensentencesareunfamiliar,andhandlingwordsasthoughtheyweremadeofwood,separatelyofgreatimportance,andpossessedofshapesliketablesorchairs。Inthiswayshecametoconclusions,whichhadtoberemodelledaccordingtotheadventuresoftheday,andwereindeedrecastasliberallyasanyonecoulddesire,leavingalwaysasmallgrainofbeliefbehindthem。 IbsenwassucceededbyanovelsuchasMrs。Ambrosedetested,whosepurposewastodistributetheguiltofawoman’sdownfallupontherightshoulders;apurposewhichwasachieved,ifthereader’sdiscomfortwereanyproofofit。Shethrewthebookdown,lookedoutofthewindow,turnedawayfromthewindow,andrelapsedintoanarm-chair。