第42章

类别:其他 作者:Virginia Woolf字数:5305更新时间:18/12/27 08:07:33
“Whatisityouwant?“saidEvelyn。“Youmakemefeelasifyouwerealwaysthinkingofsomethingyoudon’tsay……Dosayit!“ ButRachelmadenoresponsetothisinvitationeither。Shestoppedwithherfingersonthehandleofthedoor,asifsherememberedthatsomesortofpronouncementwasduefromher。 “Isupposeyou’llmarryoneofthem,“shesaid,andthenturnedthehandleandshutthedoorbehindher。Shewalkedslowlydownthepassage,runningherhandalongthewallbesideher。 Shedidnotthinkwhichwayshewasgoing,andthereforewalkeddownapassagewhichonlyledtoawindowandabalcony。Shelookeddownatthekitchenpremises,thewrongsideofthehotellife,whichwascutofffromtherightsidebyamazeofsmallbushes。 Thegroundwasbare,oldtinswerescatteredabout,andthebushesworetowelsandapronsupontheirheadstodry。Everynowandthenawaitercameoutinawhiteapronandthrewrubbishontoaheap。 Twolargewomenincottondressesweresittingonabenchwithblood-smearedtintraysinfrontofthemandyellowbodiesacrosstheirknees。Theywerepluckingthebirds,andtalkingastheyplucked。 Suddenlyachickencamefloundering,halfflying,halfrunningintothespace,pursuedbyathirdwomanwhoseagecouldhardlybeundereighty。Althoughwizenedandunsteadyonherlegsshekeptupthechase,eggedonbythelaughteroftheothers;herfacewasexpressiveoffuriousrage,andassheranshesworeinSpanish。 Frightenedbyhand-clappinghere,anapkinthere,thebirdranthiswayandthatinsharpangles,andfinallyflutteredstraightattheoldwoman,whoopenedherscantygreyskirtstoencloseit,droppeduponitinabundle,andthenholdingitoutcutitsheadoffwithanexpressionofvindictiveenergyandtriumphcombined。 ThebloodandtheuglywrigglingfascinatedRachel,sothatalthoughsheknewthatsomeonehadcomeupbehindandwasstandingbesideher,shedidnotturnrounduntiltheoldwomanhadsettleddownonthebenchbesidetheothers。Thenshelookedupsharply,becauseoftheuglinessofwhatshehadseen。ItwasMissAllanwhostoodbesideher。 “Notaprettysight,“saidMissAllan,“althoughIdaresayit’sreallymorehumanethanourmethod……Idon’tbelieveyou’veeverbeeninmyroom,“sheadded,andturnedawayasifshemeantRacheltofollowher。Rachelfollowed,foritseemedpossiblethateachnewpersonmightremovethemysterywhichburdenedher。 Thebedroomsatthehotelwereallonthesamepattern,savethatsomewerelargerandsomesmaller;theyhadafloorofdarkredtiles; theyhadahighbed,drapedinmosquitocurtains;theyhadeachawriting-tableandadressing-table,andacoupleofarm-chairs。 Butdirectlyaboxwasunpackedtheroomsbecameverydifferent,sothatMissAllan’sroomwasveryunlikeEvelyn’sroom。 Therewerenovariouslycolouredhatpinsonherdressing-table; noscent-bottles;nonarrowcurvedpairsofscissors;nogreatvarietyofshoesandboots;nosilkpetticoatslyingonthechairs。Theroomwasextremelyneat。Thereseemedtobetwopairsofeverything。 Thewriting-table,however,waspiledwithmanuscript,andatablewasdrawnouttostandbythearm-chaironwhichweretwoseparateheapsofdarklibrarybooks,inwhichthereweremanyslipsofpaperstickingoutatdifferentdegreesofthickness。MissAllanhadaskedRacheltocomeinoutofkindness,thinkingthatshewaswaitingaboutwithnothingtodo。Moreover,shelikedyoungwomen,forshehadtaughtmanyofthem,andhavingreceivedsomuchhospitalityfromtheAmbrosesshewasgladtobeabletorepayaminutepartofit。 Shelookedaboutaccordinglyforsomethingtoshowher。Theroomdidnotprovidemuchentertainment。Shetouchedhermanuscript。 “AgeofChaucer;AgeofElizabeth;AgeofDryden,“shereflected; “I’mgladtherearen’tmanymoreages。I’mstillinthemiddleoftheeighteenthcentury。Won’tyousitdown,MissVinrace?Thechair,thoughsmall,isfirm……Euphues。ThegermoftheEnglishnovel,“ shecontinued,glancingatanotherpage。“Isthatthekindofthingthatinterestsyou?“ ShelookedatRachelwithgreatkindnessandsimplicity,asthoughshewoulddoherutmosttoprovideanythingshewishedtohave。 Thisexpressionhadaremarkablecharminafaceotherwisemuchlinedwithcareandthought。 “Ohno,it’smusicwithyou,isn’tit?“shecontinued,recollecting,“andIgenerallyfindthattheydon’tgotogether。 Sometimesofcoursewehaveprodigies——“ShewaslookingaboutherforsomethingandnowsawajaronthemantelpiecewhichshereacheddownandgavetoRachel。“Ifyouputyourfingerintothisjaryoumaybeabletoextractapieceofpreservedginger。Areyouaprodigy?“ Butthegingerwasdeepandcouldnotbereached。 “Don’tbother,“shesaid,asMissAllanlookedaboutforsomeotherimplement。“IdaresayIshouldn’tlikepreservedginger。“ “You’venevertried?“enquiredMissAllan。“ThenIconsiderthatitisyourdutytotrynow。Why,youmayaddanewpleasuretolife,andasyouarestillyoung——“Shewonderedwhetherabutton-hookwoulddo。“Imakeitaruletotryeverything,“shesaid。“Don’tyouthinkitwouldbeveryannoyingifyoutastedgingerforthefirsttimeonyourdeath-bed,andfoundyouneverlikedanythingsomuch? IshouldbesoexceedinglyannoyedthatIthinkIshouldgetwellonthataccountalone。“ Shewasnowsuccessful,andalumpofgingeremergedontheendofthebutton-hook。Whileshewenttowipethebutton-hook,Rachelbitthegingerandatoncecried,“Imustspititout!“ “Areyousureyouhavereallytastedit?“MissAllandemanded。 ForanswerRachelthrewitoutofthewindow。 “Anexperienceanyhow,“saidMissAllancalmly。“Letmesee——Ihavenothingelsetoofferyou,unlessyouwouldliketotastethis。“ Asmallcupboardhungaboveherbed,andshetookoutofitaslimelegantjarfilledwithabrightgreenfluid。 “CremedeMenthe,“shesaid。“Liqueur,youknow。ItlooksasifIdrank,doesn’tit?AsamatteroffactitgoestoprovewhatanexceptionallyabstemiouspersonIam。I’vehadthatjarforsix-and-twentyyears,“sheadded,lookingatitwithpride,asshetippeditover,andfromtheheightoftheliquiditcouldbeseenthatthebottlewasstilluntouched。 “Twenty-sixyears?“Rachelexclaimed。 MissAllanwasgratified,forshehadmeantRacheltobesurprised。 “WhenIwenttoDresdensix-and-twentyyearsago,“shesaid,“acertainfriendofmineannouncedherintentionofmakingmeapresent。Shethoughtthatintheeventofshipwreckoraccidentastimulantmightbeuseful。However,asIhadnooccasionforit,Igaveitbackonmyreturn。Ontheeveofanyforeignjourneythesamebottlealwaysmakesitsappearance,withthesamenote; onmyreturninsafetyitisalwayshandedback。Iconsideritakindofcharmagainstaccidents。ThoughIwasoncedetainedtwenty-fourhoursbyanaccidenttothetraininfrontofme,Ihavenevermetwithanyaccidentmyself。Yes,“shecontinued,nowaddressingthebottle,“wehaveseenmanyclimesandcupboardstogether,havewenot?Iintendoneofthesedaystohaveasilverlabelmadewithaninscription。Itisagentleman,asyoumayobserve,andhisnameisOliver……IdonotthinkIcouldforgiveyou,MissVinrace,ifyoubrokemyOliver,“shesaid,firmlytakingthebottleoutofRachel’shandsandreplacingitinthecupboard。 Rachelwasswingingthebottlebytheneck。ShewasinterestedbyMissAllantothepointofforgettingthebottle。 “Well,“sheexclaimed,“Idothinkthatodd;tohavehadafriendfortwenty-sixyears,andabottle,and——tohavemadeallthosejourneys。“ “Notatall;Icallitthereverseofodd,“MissAllanreplied。 “IalwaysconsidermyselfthemostordinarypersonIknow。 It’sratherdistinguishedtobeasordinaryasIam。Iforget—— areyouaprodigy,ordidyousayyouwerenotaprodigy?“ ShesmiledatRachelverykindly。Sheseemedtohaveknownandexperiencedsomuch,asshemovedcumbrouslyabouttheroom,thatsurelytheremustbebalmforallanguishinherwords,couldoneinducehertohaverecoursetothem。ButMissAllan,whowasnowlockingthecupboarddoor,showednosignsofbreakingthereticencewhichhadsnowedherunderforyears。 AnuncomfortablesensationkeptRachelsilent;ontheonehand,shewishedtowhirlhighandstrikeasparkoutofthecoolpinkflesh; ontheothersheperceivedtherewasnothingtobedonebuttodriftpasteachotherinsilence。 “I’mnotaprodigy。IfinditverydifficulttosaywhatImean——“ sheobservedatlength。 “It’samatteroftemperament,Ibelieve,“MissAllanhelpedher。 “Therearesomepeoplewhohavenodifficulty;formyselfIfindthereareagreatmanythingsIsimplycannotsay。ButthenI considermyselfveryslow。Oneofmycolleaguesnow,knowswhethershelikesyouornot——letmesee,howdoesshedoit?——bythewayyousaygood-morningatbreakfast。ItissometimesamatterofyearsbeforeIcanmakeupmymind。Butmostyoungpeopleseemtofinditeasy?“ “Ohno,“saidRachel。“It’shard!“ MissAllanlookedatRachelquietly,sayingnothing;shesuspectedthatthereweredifficultiesofsomekind。Thensheputherhandtothebackofherhead,anddiscoveredthatoneofthegreycoilsofhairhadcomeloose。 “Imustaskyoutobesokindastoexcuseme,“shesaid,rising,“ifIdomyhair。Ihaveneveryetfoundasatisfactorytypeofhairpin。Imustchangemydress,too,forthematterofthat; andIshouldbeparticularlygladofyourassistance,becausethereisatiresomesetofhookswhichI_can_fastenformyself,butittakesfromtentofifteenminutes;whereaswithyourhelp——“ Sheslippedoffhercoatandskirtandblouse,andstooddoingherhairbeforetheglass,amassivehomelyfigure,herpetticoatbeingsoshortthatshestoodonapairofthickslate-greylegs。 “Peoplesayyouthispleasant;Imyselffindmiddleagefarpleasanter,“ sheremarked,removinghairpinsandcombs,andtakingupherbrush。 Whenitfelllooseherhaironlycamedowntoherneck。 “Whenonewasyoung,“shecontinued,“thingscouldseemsoveryseriousifonewasmadethatway……Andnowmydress。“ Inawonderfullyshortspaceoftimeherhairhadbeenreformedinitsusualloops。Theupperhalfofherbodynowbecamedarkgreenwithblackstripesonit;theskirt,however,neededhookingatvariousangles,andRachelhadtokneelonthefloor,fittingtheeyestothehooks。 “OurMissJohnsonusedtofindlifeveryunsatisfactory,Iremember,“ MissAllancontinued。Sheturnedherbacktothelight。“Andthenshetooktobreedingguinea-pigsfortheirspots,andbecameabsorbedinthat。Ihavejustheardthattheyellowguinea-pighashadablackbaby。Wehadabetofsixpenceonaboutit。 Shewillbeverytriumphant。“ Theskirtwasfastened。Shelookedatherselfintheglasswiththecuriousstiffeningofherfacegenerallycausedbylookingintheglass。 “AmIinafitstatetoencountermyfellow-beings?“sheasked。 “Iforgetwhichwayitis——buttheyfindblackanimalsveryrarelyhavecolouredbabies——itmaybetheotherwayround。Ihavehaditsooftenexplainedtomethatitisverystupidofmetohaveforgottenagain。“ Shemovedabouttheroomacquiringsmallobjectswithquietforce,andfixingthemabouther——alocket,awatchandchain,aheavygoldbracelet,andtheparti-colouredbuttonofasuffragesociety。 Finally,completelyequippedforSundaytea,shestoodbeforeRachel,andsmiledatherkindly。Shewasnotanimpulsivewoman,andherlifehadschooledhertorestrainhertongue。Atthesametime,shewaspossessedofanamountofgood-willtowardsothers,andinparticulartowardstheyoung,whichoftenmadeherregretthatspeechwassodifficult。 “Shallwedescend?“shesaid。 SheputonehanduponRachel’sshoulder,andstooping,pickedupapairofwalking-shoeswiththeother,andplacedthemneatlysidebysideoutsideherdoor。Astheywalkeddownthepassagetheypassedmanypairsofbootsandshoes,someblackandsomebrown,allsidebyside,andalldifferent,eventothewayinwhichtheylaytogether。 “Ialwaysthinkthatpeoplearesoliketheirboots,“saidMissAllan。 “ThatisMrs。Paley’s——“butasshespokethedooropened,andMrs。Paleyrolledoutinherchair,equippedalsofortea。 ShegreetedMissAllanandRachel。