第53章

类别:其他 作者:Virginia Woolf字数:5670更新时间:18/12/27 08:07:33
“Well,“sheexclaimed,withherusualenthusiasm,seizingRachelbythearm,“Icallthissplendid!Iguesseditwasgoingtohappenfromtheverybeginning!Isawyoutwoweremadeforeachother。 Nowyou’vejustgottotellmeallaboutit——when’sittobe,whereareyougoingtolive——areyoubothtremendouslyhappy?“ ButtheattentionofthegroupwasdivertedtoMrs。Elliot,whowaspassingthemwithhereagerbutuncertainmovement,carryinginherhandsaplateandanemptyhot-waterbottle。 Shewouldhavepassedthem,butMrs。Thornburywentupandstoppedher。 “Thankyou,Hughling’sbetter,“shereplied,inanswertoMrs。Thornbury’senquiry,“buthe’snotaneasypatient。Hewantstoknowwhathistemperatureis,andifItellhimhegetsanxious,andifIdon’ttellhimhesuspects。Youknowwhatmenarewhenthey’reill! Andofcoursetherearenoneoftheproperappliances,and,thoughheseemsverywillingandanxioustohelp“(heresheloweredhervoicemysteriously),“onecan’tfeelthatDr。Rodriguezisthesameasaproperdoctor。Ifyouwouldcomeandseehim,Mr。Hewet,“ sheadded,“Iknowitwouldcheerhimup——lyingthereinbedallday—— andtheflies——ButImustgoandfindAngelo——thefoodhere—— ofcourse,withaninvalid,onewantsthingsparticularlynice。“ Andshehurriedpasttheminsearchoftheheadwaiter。Theworryofnursingherhusbandhadfixedaplaintivefrownuponherforehead; shewaspaleandlookedunhappyandmorethanusuallyinefficient,andhereyeswanderedmorevaguelythaneverfrompointtopoint。 “Poorthing!“Mrs。Thornburyexclaimed。ShetoldthemthatforsomedaysHughlingElliothadbeenill,andtheonlydoctoravailablewasthebrotheroftheproprietor,orsotheproprietorsaid,whoserighttothetitleofdoctorwasnotabovesuspicion。 “Iknowhowwretcheditistobeillinahotel,“Mrs。Thornburyremarked,oncemoreleadingthewaywithRacheltothegarden。 “IspentsixweeksonmyhoneymooninhavingtyphoidatVenice,“ shecontinued。“Butevenso,Ilookbackuponthemassomeofthehappiestweeksinmylife。Ah,yes,“shesaid,takingRachel’sarm,“youthinkyourselfhappynow,butit’snothingtothehappinessthatcomesafterwards。AndIassureyouIcouldfinditinmyhearttoenvyyouyoungpeople!You’veamuchbettertimethanwehad,Imaytellyou。WhenIlookbackuponit,Icanhardlybelievehowthingshavechanged。WhenwewereengagedIwasn’tallowedtogoforwalkswithWilliamalone——someonehadalwaystobeintheroomwithus——IreallybelieveIhadtoshowmyparentsallhisletters!—— thoughtheywereveryfondofhimtoo。Indeed,Imaysaytheylookeduponhimastheirownson。Itamusesme,“shecontinued,“tothinkhowstricttheyweretous,whenIseehowtheyspoiltheirgrand-children!“ Thetablewaslaidunderthetreeagain,andtakingherplacebeforetheteacups,Mrs。Thornburybeckonedandnoddeduntilshehadcollectedquiteanumberofpeople,SusanandArthurandMr。Pepper,whowerestrollingabout,waitingforthetournamenttobegin。 Amurmuringtree,ariverbrimminginthemoonlight,Terence’swordscamebacktoRachelasshesatdrinkingtheteaandlisteningtothewordswhichflowedonsolightly,sokindly,andwithsuchsilverysmoothness。Thislonglifeandallthesechildrenhadleftherverysmooth;theyseemedtohaverubbedawaythemarksofindividuality,andtohaveleftonlywhatwasoldandmaternal。 “Andthethingsyouyoungpeoplearegoingtosee!“ Mrs。Thornburycontinued。Sheincludedthemallinherforecast,sheincludedthemallinhermaternity,althoughthepartycomprisedWilliamPepperandMissAllan,bothofwhommighthavebeensupposedtohaveseenafairshareofthepanorama。 “WhenIseehowtheworldhaschangedinmylifetime,“shewenton,“Icansetnolimittowhatmayhappeninthenextfiftyyears。 Ah,no,Mr。Pepper,Idon’tagreewithyouintheleast,“shelaughed,interruptinghisgloomyremarkaboutthingsgoingsteadilyfrombadtoworse。“IknowIoughttofeelthat,butIdon’t,I’mafraid。They’regoingtobemuchbetterpeoplethanwewere。 Surelyeverythinggoestoprovethat。AllroundmeIseewomen,youngwomen,womenwithhouseholdcaresofeverysort,goingoutanddoingthingsthatweshouldnothavethoughtitpossibletodo。“ Mr。Pepperthoughthersentimentalandirrationallikealloldwomen,buthermanneroftreatinghimasifhewereacrossoldbabybaffledhimandcharmedhim,andhecouldonlyreplytoherwithacuriousgrimacewhichwasmoreasmilethanafrown。 “Andtheyremainwomen,“Mrs。Thornburyadded。“Theygiveagreatdealtotheirchildren。“ AsshesaidthisshesmiledslightlyinthedirectionofSusanandRachel。Theydidnotliketobeincludedinthesamelot,buttheybothsmiledalittleself-consciously,andArthurandTerenceglancedateachothertoo。Shemadethemfeelthattheywereallinthesameboattogether,andtheylookedatthewomentheyweregoingtomarryandcomparedthem。ItwasinexplicablehowanyonecouldwishtomarryRachel,incrediblethatanyoneshouldbereadytospendhislifewithSusan;butsingularthoughtheother’stastemustbe,theyboreeachothernoill-willonaccountofit;indeed,theylikedeachotherratherthebetterfortheeccentricityoftheirchoice。 “Ireallymustcongratulateyou,“Susanremarked,assheleantacrossthetableforthejam。 ThereseemedtobenofoundationforSt。John’sgossipaboutArthurandSusan。Sunburntandvigoroustheysatsidebyside,withtheirracquetsacrosstheirknees,notsayingmuchbutsmilingslightlyallthetime。Throughthethinwhiteclotheswhichtheywore,itwaspossibletoseethelinesoftheirbodiesandlegs,thebeautifulcurvesoftheirmuscles,hisleannessandherflesh,anditwasnaturaltothinkofthefirm-fleshedsturdychildrenthatwouldbetheirs。Theirfaceshadtoolittleshapeinthemtobebeautiful,buttheyhadcleareyesandanappearanceofgreathealthandpowerofendurance,foritseemedasifthebloodwouldneverceasetoruninhisveins,ortoliedeeplyandcalmlyinhercheeks。 Theireyesatthepresentmomentwerebrighterthanusual,andworethepeculiarexpressionofpleasureandself-confidencewhichisseenintheeyesofathletes,fortheyhadbeenplayingtennis,andtheywerebothfirst-rateatthegame。 Evelynhadnotspoken,butshehadbeenlookingfromSusantoRachel。Well——theyhadbothmadeuptheirmindsveryeasily,theyhaddoneinaveryfewweekswhatitsometimesseemedtoherthatshewouldneverbeabletodo。Althoughtheyweresodifferent,shethoughtthatshecouldseeineachthesamelookofsatisfactionandcompletion,thesamecalmnessofmanner,andthesameslownessofmovement。Itwasthatslowness,thatconfidence,thatcontentwhichshehated,shethoughttoherself。Theymovedsoslowlybecausetheywerenotsinglebutdouble,andSusanwasattachedtoArthur,andRacheltoTerence,andforthesakeofthisonemantheyhadrenouncedallothermen,andmovement,andtherealthingsoflife。Lovewasallverywell,andthosesnugdomestichouses,withthekitchenbelowandthenurseryabove,whichweresosecludedandself-contained,likelittleislandsinthetorrentsoftheworld; buttherealthingsweresurelythethingsthathappened,thecauses,thewars,theideals,whichhappenedinthegreatworldoutside,andwentsoindependentlyofthesewomen,turningsoquietlyandbeautifullytowardsthemen。Shelookedatthemsharply。Ofcoursetheywerehappyandcontent,buttheremustbebetterthingsthanthat。 Surelyonecouldgetnearertolife,onecouldgetmoreoutoflife,onecouldenjoymoreandfeelmorethantheywouldeverdo。 Rachelinparticularlookedsoyoung——whatcouldsheknowoflife? Shebecamerestless,andgettingup,crossedovertositbesideRachel。 Sheremindedherthatshehadpromisedtojoinherclub。 “Thebotheris,“shewenton,“thatImayn’tbeabletostartworkseriouslytillOctober。I’vejusthadaletterfromafriendofminewhosebrotherisinbusinessinMoscow。Theywantmetostaywiththem,andasthey’reinthethickofalltheconspiraciesandanarchists,I’veagoodmindtostoponmywayhome。Itsoundstoothrilling。“ ShewantedtomakeRachelseehowthrillingitwas。“Myfriendknowsagirloffifteenwho’sbeensenttoSiberiaforlifemerelybecausetheycaughtheraddressingalettertoananarchist。 Andtheletterwasn’tfromher,either。I’dgiveallIhaveintheworldtohelponarevolutionagainsttheRussiangovernment,andit’sboundtocome。“ ShelookedfromRacheltoTerence。Theywerebothalittletouchedbythesightofherrememberinghowlatelytheyhadbeenlisteningtoevilwordsabouther,andTerenceaskedherwhatherschemewas,andsheexplainedthatshewasgoingtofoundaclub——aclubfordoingthings,reallydoingthem。Shebecameveryanimated,asshetalkedonandon,forsheprofessedherselfcertainthatifoncetwentypeople——no,tenwouldbeenoughiftheywerekeen——setaboutdoingthingsinsteadoftalkingaboutdoingthem,theycouldabolishalmosteveryevilthatexists。Itwasbrainsthatwereneeded。 Ifonlypeoplewithbrains——ofcoursetheywouldwantaroom,aniceroom,inBloomsburypreferably,wheretheycouldmeetonceaweek…… AsshetalkedTerencecouldseethetracesoffadingyouthinherface,thelinesthatwerebeingdrawnbytalkandexcitementroundhermouthandeyes,buthedidnotpityher;lookingintothosebright,ratherhard,andverycourageouseyes,hesawthatshedidnotpityherself,orfeelanydesiretoexchangeherownlifeforthemorerefinedandorderlylivesofpeoplelikehimselfandSt。John,although,astheyearswentby,thefightwouldbecomeharderandharder。 Perhaps,though,shewouldsettledown;perhaps,afterall,shewouldmarryPerrott。Whilehismindwashalfoccupiedwithwhatshewassaying,hethoughtofherprobabledestiny,thelightcloudsoftobaccosmokeservingtoobscurehisfacefromhereyes。 TerencesmokedandArthursmokedandEvelynsmoked,sothattheairwasfullofthemistandfragranceofgoodtobacco。Intheintervalswhennoonespoke,theyheardfaroffthelowmurmurofthesea,asthewavesquietlybrokeandspreadthebeachwithafilmofwater,andwithdrewtobreakagain。Thecoolgreenlightfellthroughtheleavesofthetree,andthereweresoftcrescentsanddiamondsofsunshineupontheplatesandthetablecloth。Mrs。Thornbury,afterwatchingthemallforatimeinsilence,begantoaskRachelkindlyquestions——Whendidtheyallgoback?Oh,theyexpectedherfather。Shemustwanttoseeherfather——therewouldbeagreatdealtotellhim,and(shelookedsympatheticallyatTerence) hewouldbesohappy,shefeltsure。Yearsago,shecontinued,itmighthavebeentenortwentyyearsago,sherememberedmeetingMr。Vinraceataparty,and,beingsomuchstruckbyhisface,whichwassounliketheordinaryfaceoneseesataparty,thatshehadaskedwhohewas,andshewastoldthatitwasMr。Vinrace,andshehadalwaysrememberedthename,——anuncommonname,——andhehadaladywithhim,averysweet-lookingwoman,butitwasoneofthosedreadfulLondoncrushes,whereyoudon’ttalk,——youonlylookateachother,——andalthoughshehadshakenhandswithMr。Vinrace,shedidn’tthinktheyhadsaidanything。Shesighedveryslightly,rememberingthepast。 ThensheturnedtoMr。Pepper,whohadbecomeverydependentonher,sothathealwayschoseaseatnearher,andattendedtowhatshewassaying,althoughhedidnotoftenmakeanyremarkofhisown。 “Youwhoknoweverything,Mr。Pepper,“shesaid,“tellushowdidthosewonderfulFrenchladiesmanagetheirsalons?DidweeverdoanythingofthesamekindinEngland,ordoyouthinkthatthereissomereasonwhywecannotdoitinEngland?“ Mr。PepperwaspleasedtoexplainveryaccuratelywhytherehasneverbeenanEnglishsalon。Therewerethreereasons,andtheywereverygoodones,hesaid。Asforhimself,whenhewenttoaparty,asonewassometimesobligedto,fromawishnottogiveoffence—— hisniece,forexample,hadbeenmarriedtheotherday——hewalkedintothemiddleoftheroom,said“Ha!ha!“asloudaseverhecould,consideredthathehaddonehisduty,andwalkedawayagain。 Mrs。Thornburyprotested。Shewasgoingtogiveapartydirectlyshegotback,andtheywerealltobeinvited,andsheshouldsetpeopletowatchMr。Pepper,andifsheheardthathehadbeencaughtsaying“Ha!ha!“shewould——shewoulddosomethingverydreadfulindeedtohim。ArthurVenningsuggestedthatwhatshemustdowastorigupsomethinginthenatureofasurprise——aportrait,forexample,ofaniceoldladyinalacecap,concealingabathofcoldwater,whichatasignalcouldbesprungonPepper’shead; orthey’dhaveachairwhichshothimtwentyfeethighdirectlyhesatonit。 Susanlaughed。Shehaddonehertea;shewasfeelingverywellcontented,partlybecauseshehadbeenplayingtennisbrilliantly,andtheneveryonewassonice;shewasbeginningtofinditsomucheasiertotalk,andtoholdherownevenwithquitecleverpeople,forsomehowcleverpeopledidnotfrightenheranymore。