第20章

Eleanorwascertainlythinkingmoreofherfatherthanherself，asshearrangedherhairbeforetheglass，andremovedthetracesofsorrowfromherface；andyetIshouldbeuntrueifIsaidthatshewasnotanxioustoappearwellbeforeherlover: whyelsewasshesosedulouswiththatstubborncurlthatwouldrebelagainstherhand，andsmoothsoeagerlyherruffledribands？whyelsedidshedamphereyestodispeltheredness，andbiteherprettylipstobringbackthecolour？Ofcourseshewasanxioustolookherbest，forshewasbutamortalangelafterall。Buthadshebeenimmortal，hadsheflittedbacktothesitting-roomonacherub’swings，shecouldnothavehadamorefaithfulheart，oratruerwishtosaveherfatheratanycosttoherself。 JohnBoldhadnotmethersincethedaywhenshelefthimindudgeoninthecathedralclose。Sincethathiswholetimehadbeenoccupiedinpromotingthecauseagainstherfather，andnotunsuccessfully。Hehadoftenthoughtofher，andturnedoverinhismindahundredschemesforshowingherhowdisinterestedwashislove。Hewouldwritetoherandbeseechhernottoallowtheperformanceofapublicdutytoinjurehiminherestimation；hewouldwritetoMrHarding，explainallhisviews，andboldlyclaimthewarden’sdaughter，urgingthattheuntowardcircumstancesbetweenthemneedbenobartotheirancientfriendship，ortoaclosertie；hewouldthrowhimselfonhiskneesbeforehismistress；hewouldwaitandmarrythedaughterwhenthefatherhaslosthishomeandhisincome；hewouldgiveupthelawsuitandgotoAustralia，withherofcourse，leavingTheJupiterandMrFinneytocompletethecasebetweenthem。Sometimesashewokeinthemorningfeveredandimpatient，hewouldblowouthisbrainsandhavedonewithallhiscares——butthisideawasgenerallyconsequentonanimprudentsupperenjoyedincompanywithTomTowers。 HowbeautifulEleanorappearedtohimassheslowlywalkedintotheroom！Notfornothinghadallthoselittlecaresbeentaken。Thoughhersister，thearchdeacon’swife，hadspokenslightinglyofhercharms，Eleanorwasverybeautifulwhenseenaright。Herswasnotofthoseimpassivefaces，whichhavethebeautyofamarblebust；finelychiselledfeatures，perfectineveryline，truetotherulesofsymmetry，aslovelytoastrangerastoafriend，unvaryingunlessinsickness，orasageaffectsthem。Shehadnostartlingbrilliancyofbeauty，nopearlywhiteness，noradiantcarnation。Shehadnotthemajesticcontourthatrivetsattention，demandsinstantwonderandthendisappointsbythecoldnessofitscharms。YoumightpassEleanorHardinginthestreetwithoutnotice，butyoucouldhardlypassaneveningwithherandnotloseyourheart。 Shehadneverappearedmorelovelytoherloverthanshenowdid。Herfacewasanimatedthoughitwasserious，andherfulldarklustrouseyesshonewithanxiousenergy；herhandtrembledasshetookhis，andshecouldhardlypronouncehisname，whensheaddressedhim。BoldwishedwithallhisheartthattheAustralianschemewasintheactofrealisation，andthatheandEleanorwereawaytogether，nevertohearfurtherofthelawsuit。 Hebegantotalk，askedafterherhealth——saidsomethingaboutLondonbeingverystupid，andmoreaboutBarchesterbeingverypleasant；declaredtheweathertobeveryhot，andtheninquiredafterMrHarding。 ’Myfatherisnotverywell，’saidEleanor。 JohnBoldwasverysorry，sosorry:hehopeditwasnothingserious，andputontheunmeaninglysolemnfacewhichpeopleusuallyuseonsuchoccasions。 ’Iespeciallywanttospeaktoyouaboutmyfather，MrBold； indeed，Iamnowhereonpurposetodoso。Papaisveryunhappy，veryunhappyindeed，aboutthisaffairofthehospital: youwouldpityhim，MrBold，ifyoucouldseehowwretchedithasmadehim。’ ’Oh，MissHarding！’ ’Indeedyouwould——anyonewouldpityhim；butafriend，anoldfriendasyouare——indeedyouwould。Heisanalteredman；hischeerfulnesshasallgone，andhissweettemper，andhiskindhappytoneofvoice；youwouldhardlyknowhimifyousawhim，MrBold，heissomuchaltered；and——and——ifthisgoeson，hewilldie。’HereEleanorhadrecoursetoherhandkerchief，andsoalsohadherauditors；butshepluckeduphercourage，andwentonwithhertale。’Hewillbreakhisheart，anddie。Iamsure，MrBold，itwasnotyouwhowrotethosecruelthingsinthenewspaper——’ JohnBoldeagerlyprotestedthatitwasnot，buthisheartsmotehimastohisintimatealliancewithTomTowers。 ’No，Iamsureitwasnot；andpapahasnotforamomentthoughtso；youwouldnotbesocruel——butithasnearlykilledhim。Papacannotbeartothinkthatpeopleshouldsospeakofhim，andthateverybodyshouldhearhimsospokenof:——theyhavecalledhimavaricious，anddishonest，andtheysayheisrobbingtheoldmen，andtakingthemoneyofthehospitalfornothing。’ ’Ihaveneversaidso，MissHarding。I——’ ’No，’continuedEleanor，interruptinghim，forshewasnowinthefullflood-tideofhereloquence；’no，Iamsureyouhavenot；butothershavesaidso；andifthisgoeson，ifsuchthingsarewrittenagain，itwillkillpapa。Oh！MrBold，ifyouonlyknewthestateheisin！Nowpapadoesnotcaremuchaboutmoney。’ Bothherauditors，brotherandsister，assentedtothis，anddeclaredontheirownknowledgethatnomanlivedlessaddictedtofilthylucrethanthewarden。 ’Oh！it’ssokindofyoutosayso，Mary，andofyoutoo，MrBold。Icouldn’tbearthatpeopleshouldthinkunjustlyofpapa。Doyouknowhewouldgiveupthehospitalaltogether，onlyhecannot。Thearchdeaconsaysitwouldbecowardly，andthathewouldbedesertinghisorder，andinjuringthechurch。Whatevermayhappen，papawillnotdothat:hewouldleavetheplacetomorrowwillingly，andgiveuphishouse，andtheincomeandallifthearchdeacon——’ Eleanorwasgoingtosay’wouldlethim，’butshestoppedherselfbeforeshehadcompromisedherfather’sdignity；andgivingalongsigh，sheadded——’Oh，Idosowishhewould。’ ’NoonewhoknowsMrHardingpersonallyaccuseshimforamoment，’saidBold。 ’Itishethathastobearthepunishment；itishethatsuffers，’saidEleanor；’andwhatfor？whathashedonewrong？howhashedeservedthispersecution？hethatneverhadanunkindthoughtinhislife，hethatneversaidanunkindword！’andhereshebrokedown，andtheviolenceofhersobsstoppedherutterance。 Bold，forthefifthorsixthtime，declaredthatneitherhenoranyofhisfriendsimputedanyblamepersonallytoMrHarding。 ’Thenwhyshouldhebepersecuted？’ejaculatedEleanorthroughhertears，forgettinginhereagernessthatherintentionhadbeentohumbleherselfasasuppliantbeforeJohnBold—— ’whyshouldhebesingledoutforscornanddisgrace？whyshouldhebemadesowretched？Oh！MrBold’——andsheturnedtowardshimasthoughthekneelingscenewereabouttobecommenced——’oh！MrBold，whydidyoubeginallthis？You，whomweallso——so——valued！’ Tospeakthetruth，thereformer’spunishmentwascertainlycomeuponhim，forhispresentplightwasnotenviable；hehadnothingforitbuttoexcusehimselfbyplatitudesaboutpublicduty，whichitisbynomeansworthwhiletorepeat，andtoreiteratehiseulogyonMrHarding’scharacter。Hispositionwascertainlyacruelone:hadanygentlemancalleduponhimonbehalfofMrHardinghecouldofcoursehavedeclinedtoenteruponthesubject；buthowcouldhedosowithabeautifulgirl，withthedaughterofthemanwhomhehadinjured，withhisownlove？ InthemeantimeEleanorrecollectedherself，andagainsummonedupherenergies。’MrBold，’saidshe，’Ihavecomeheretoimploreyoutoabandonthisproceeding。’Hestoodupfromhisseat，andlookedbeyondmeasuredistressed。 ’Toimploreyoutoabandonit，toimploreyoutosparemyfather，tospareeitherhislifeorhisreason，foroneortheotherwillpaytheforfeitifthisgoeson。IknowhowmuchIamasking，andhowlittlerightIhavetoaskanything；butIthinkyouwilllistentomeasitisformyfather。Oh，MrBold，pray，praydothisforus——praydonotdrivetodistractionamanwhohaslovedyousowell。’ Shedidnotabsolutelykneeltohim，butshefollowedhimashemovedfromhischair，andlaidhersofthandsimploringlyuponhisarm。Ah！atanyothertimehowexquisitelyvaluablewouldhavebeenthattouch！butnowhewasdistraught，dumbfoundedandunmanned。Whatcouldhesaytothatsweetsuppliant；howexplaintoherthatthematternowwasprobablybeyondhiscontrol；howtellherthathecouldnotquellthestormwhichhehadraised？ ’Surely，surely，John，youcannotrefuseher，’saidhissister。 ’Iwouldgivehermysoul，’saidhe，’ifitwouldserveher。’ ’Oh，MrBold，’saidEleanor，’donotspeakso；Iasknothingformyself；andwhatIaskformyfather，itcannotharmyoutogrant。’ ’Iwouldgivehermysoul，ifitwouldserveher，’saidBold，stilladdressinghissister；’everythingIhaveishers，ifshewillacceptit；myhouse，myheart，myall；everyhopeofmybreastiscentredinher；hersmilesaresweetertomethanthesun，andwhenIseeherinsorrowasshenowis，everynerveinmybodysuffers。NomancanlovebetterthanIloveher。’ ’No，no，no，’ejaculatedEleanor；’therecanbenotalkoflovebetweenus。Willyouprotectmyfatherfromtheevilyouhavebroughtuponhim？’ ’Oh，Eleanor，Iwilldoanything；letmetellyouhowI loveyou！’ ’No，no，no！’shealmostscreamed。’Thisisunmanlyofyou，MrBold。Willyou，willyou，willyouleavemyfathertodieinpeaceinhisquiethome？’andseizinghimbyhisarmandhand，shefollowedhimacrosstheroomtowardsthedoor。 ’Iwillnotleaveyoutillyoupromiseme；I’llclingtoyouinthestreet；I’llkneeltoyoubeforeallthepeople。Youshallpromisemethis，youshallpromisemethis，youshall——’Andsheclungtohimwithfixedtenacity，andreiteratedherresolvewithhystericalpassion。 ’Speaktoher，John；answerher，’saidMary，bewilderedbytheunexpectedvehemenceofEleanor’smanner；’youcannothavethecrueltytorefuseher。’ ’Promiseme，promiseme，’saidEleanor；’saythatmyfatherissafe——onewordwilldo。Iknowhowtrueyouare； sayoneword，andIwillletyougo。’