第5章

“Whatanicehandyouwrite！“(Hehimselfcouldwriteonlyinprintingfashion，inthelargescriptorycharactersoftheEcclesiasticalRubric，notinthoseoftheordinarykind。) “Forexample，thatscoopthere——whatdoesITsay？“ “Itistheword’Good。’“ “’Good’？Butwhataslip-knotofathing！AndwhatarethosewordsTHERE，onTHATline？“ “Theysay，’Planks，1vershokby9arshini，5。’“ “No，sixwasthenumberused。“ “No，five。“ “Five？Why，thesoldierbrokeone，didn’the？“ “Yes，butnevermind——atleastitwasn’taplankthatwaswanted。“ “Oh！Well，Imaytellyouthathetookthetwopiecestothetaverntogetdrinkwith。“ Then，glancingintomyfacewithhiscornflower-blueeyesandquiet，quizzicalsmile，hewouldsaywithouttheleastconfusionashetwistedtheringletsofhisbeard: “Putdown’6。’Andseehere，youngcockerel。Theweatherhasturnedwetandcold，andtheworkishard，andsometimesfolkneedtohavetheirspiritscheeredandraisedwithadropofliquor。Sodon’tyoubetooharduponus，forGodwon’tthinkthemoreofyouforbeingstrict。“ Andashethustalkedtomeinhisslowandkindly，butsemi-affected，fashion——bespatteringme，asitwere，withwordysawdust——Iwouldsuddenlygrowblindofaneyeandsilentlyshowhimthecorrectedfigure。 “That’sit——that’sright。Andhowfinethefigurelooksnow，asitsquatstherelikeamerchant’sbuxom，comelydame！“ Thenhewouldbeseentriumphantlytellinghismatesofhissuccess；then，IwouldfindmyselffeelingacutelyconsciousofthefactthateveryonewasdespisingmeformycomplacenceYes，grownsickbeyondendurancewithayearningforsomethingwhichitcouldnotdescry，myfifteen-year-oldheartwoulddissolveinafloodofmortifiedtears，andtherewouldpassthroughmybrainthedespondent，achingthought: “Oh，whatasad，uncomfortableworldisthis！HowshouldOssiphaveknownsowellthatIshouldnotre-correctthe6intoa5，orthatIshouldnottellthecontractorthatthemenhavebarteredaplankforliquor？“ Again，therebefellanoccasionwhenthemenstoletwopounds’ weightoffivevershokmandrelsandbolts。 “Lookhere，“IsaidtoOssipwarningly。“Iamgoingtoreportthis。“ “Allright，“heagreedwithatwitchofhisgreyeyebrows。 “ThoughwhatsuchatriflecanmatterIfailtosee。Yes，goandreporteverymother’ssonofthem。“ Andtothementhemselvesheshouted: “Hi，boobies！Eachofyounowstandsdockedforsomemandrelsandbolts。“ “Why？“wastheoldsoldier’sgriminquiry。 “BecauseyouDOsostand，“carelesslyretortedtheother。 Withsnarlsthereafter，themeneyedmecovertly，untilIbegantofeelthatverylikelyIshouldnotdoasIhadthreatened，andeventhatsotodomightnotbeexpedient。 “Butlookhere，“saidItoOssip。“Iamgoingtogivethecontractornotice，andletallofyougotothedevil。ForifI weretoremainwithyoumuchlongerItooshouldbecomeathief。“ Ossipstrokedhisbeardawhile，andpondered。Thenheseatedhimselfbesideme，andsaidinanundertone: “Thatistrue。“ “Well？“ “Butthingsarealwaysso。Thetruthisthatit’stimeyoudeparted。Whatsortofawatchman，ofachecker，areyou？Injobsofthiskindwhatamanneedstoknowisthemeaningofproperty。Heneedstohaveinhimthespiritofadog，sothatheshalllookafterhismaster’sstuffashewouldlookaftertheskinwhichhismotherhasputontohisownbody。Butyou，youyoungpuppy，haven’ttheslightestnotionofwhatpropertymeans。Infact，wereanyonetogoandtellVasiliSergeitchaboutthewayinwhichyoukeeplettingusoff，he’dgiveityouintheneck。Yes，you’renogoodtohimatall，butjustanexpense:whereaswhenamanservesamasterheought，doyouunderstand，tobePROFITABLEtothatmaster。“ Herolledandhandedmeacigarette。 “Smokethis，“saidhe，“andperhapsit’llmakeyourbrainworkeasier。Ifonlyyouhadbeenofalessawkward，uncomfortablenature，Ishouldhavesaidtoyou，’Goandjointhepriests； but，asthingsare，youaren’ttherightsortforthat——you’retoostiffandunbending，andwouldnevermakeheadwayevenwithanabbot。No，you’renotthesorttoplaycardswith。Amonkislikeajackdaw——hechatterswithoutknowingwhatheischatteringabout，andpaysnoheedtotherootofthings，sobusyishewithstuffinghimselffullwiththegrain。Isaythistoyouwithabsoluteearnestness，forIperceiveyoutobestrangetoourways——acuckoothathasblunderedintothewrongnest。“ And，doffinghiscap，agesturewhichheneverfailedtoexecutewhenhehadsomethingparticularlyimportanttosay，headdedhumblyandsonorouslyasheglancedatthegreyfirmament: “InthesightoftheLordourwaysarethewaysofthieves，andsuchaswillnevergainofHimsalvation。“ “Andthatistrueenough，“respondedMokeiBudirinafterthefashionofaclarionet。 Fromthattimeforth，Ossipofthecurly，silveredhead，brighteyes，andshadowysoulbecameanobjectofagreeableinterestforme。Indeed，theregrewupbetweenusaspeciesoffriendship，eventhoughIcouldseethatacivilbearingtowardsmeinpublicwasathingthatithurthimtomaintain。Atallevents，inthepresenceofothersheavoidedmyglance，andhiseyes，clear，unsullied，andfightblueintint，waveredunsteadily，andhislipstwitchedandassumedanartificiallyunpleasantexpression，whileheutteredsomesuchspeechas: “Hi，youMakarei，seethatyoukeepyoureyesopen，andcamyourpay，orthatpigofasoldierwillbemakingawaywithmorenails！“ Butatothertimes，whenwewerealonetogether，hewouldspeaktomekindlyandinstructively，whilehiseyeswoulddanceandgleamwithafaint，grave，knowingsmile，anddartblueraysdirectintomine，whileformypart，asIlistenedtohiswords，Itookeveryoneofthemtobeabsolutelytrueandbalanced，despitetheirstrangedelivery。 “Aman’sdutyconsistsinbeinggood，“Iremarkedononeoccasion。 “Yes，ofcourse，“assentedOssip，thoughthenextmomentheveiledhiseyeswithasmile，andaddedinanundertone: “Butwhatdoyouunderstandbytheterm’good’？Inmyopinion，unlessvirtuebetotheiradvantage，folkspituponthat’goodness，’that’honourableness，’ofyours。Hence，thebetterplanistopayfolkcourt，andbeciviltothem，andflatterandcajoleeverymother’ssonofthem。Yes，dothat，andyour’goodness’willhaveachanceofbringingyouinsomereturn。NotthatIdonotsaythattobe’good，’tobeabletolookyourownuglyjowlinthefaceinamirror，ispleasantenough；but，asIseethematter，itisallonetootherpeoplewhetheryoubeacardsharperorapriestsolongasyou’repolite，andletdownyourneighbourslightly。That’swhattheywant。“ FormypartInever，atthatperiod，grewwearyofwatchingmyfellows，foritwasmyconstantideathatsomedayoneofthemwouldbeabletoraisemetoahigherlevel，andtobringmetoanunderstandingofthisunintelligibleandcomplicatedexistenceofours。HenceIkeptaskingmyselftherestless，theimportunatequestion: “Whatpreciselyisthehumansoul？ Certainsouls，Ithought，existedwhichseemedlikeballsofcopper，for，solidandimmovable，theyreflectedthingsfromtheirownpointofviewalone，inadullandirregularanddistortedfashion。Andsouls，Ithought，existedwhichseemedasflatasmirrors，and，forallintentsandpurposes，hadnoexistenceatall。 Andineverycasethehumansoulseemedformless，likeacloud，andasmurkilymutableasanimitationopal，athingwhichalteredaccordingtothecolourofwhatadjoinedit。 OnlyasregardedthesouloftheintelligentOssipwasI absolutelyataloss，absolutelyunabletoreachaconclusion。 Ponderingtheseandsimilarmattersinmymind，I，onthedayofwhichIspeak，stoodgazingattheriver，andatthetownunderthehill，asIlistenedtothebells。RearingthemselvesaloftliketheorganpipesinmyfavouritePolish-RomanCatholicchurch，thesteeplesofthetownhadtheircrossesdimlysparklingasthoughthelatterhadbeenstarsimprisonedinamurkysky。Yetitwasasthoughthosestarshopedeventuallytoascendintothepurerfirmamentabovethewind-torncloudsthattheysparkled；andasIstoodwatchingthecloudsglideonward，andmomentarilyeffacewiththeirshadows，thetown’smultifarioushues，Imarkedthefactthatalthough，wheneverdark-bluecavitiesintheirsubstancepermittedthebeamsofthesuntoilluminatethebuildingsbelow，thosebuildings’roofsassumedtintsofincreasedcheerfulness。Thecloudsseemedtoglidethefastertoveilthebeams，whilethehumidshadowsgrewmoreopaque——andthescenedarkenedasthoughonlyforamomenthaditassumedasemblanceofjoy。