第17章

tablealight，thatwasall——sometimesoneorotherwouldflareupintoatall，lean，astonishedflameforaspace。Andqueerthingshappened。 ’Ican’t，’hesaid；’Ishallnever——！’Andsuddenlyhesatdownonalittlechairatthefootofthebedandbegantosobandsob。 Lord！whataharrowing，whimperingthingheseemed！ “’Youpullyourselftogether，’Isaid，andtriedtopathimontheback，and……myconfoundedhandwentthroughhim！Bythattime，youknow，Iwasn’tnearlyso——massiveasIhadbeenonthelanding。 Igotthequeernessofitfull。Iremembersnatchingbackmyhandoutofhim，asitwere，withalittlethrill，andwalkingovertothedressing-table。’Youpullyourselftogether，’Isaidtohim，’andtry。’AndinordertoencourageandhelphimIbegantotryaswell。“ “What！“saidSanderson，“thepasses？“ “Yes，thepasses。“ “But——“Isaid，movedbyanideathateludedmeforaspace。 “Thisisinteresting，“saidSanderson，withhisfingerinhispipe- bowl。“Youmeantosaythisghostofyoursgaveaway——“ “Didhislevelbesttogiveawaythewholeconfoundedbarrier？YES。“ “Hedidn’t，“saidWish；“hecouldn’t。Oryou’dhavegonetheretoo。“ “That’spreciselyit，“Isaid，findingmyelusiveideaputintowordsforme。 “ThatISpreciselyit，“saidClayton，withthoughtfuleyesuponthefire。 Forjustalittlewhiletherewassilence。 “Andatlasthedidit？“saidSanderson。 “Atlasthedidit。Ihadtokeephimuptoithard，buthediditatlast——rathersuddenly。Hedespaired，wehadascene，andthenhegotupabruptlyandaskedmetogothroughthewholeperformance，slowly，sothathemightsee。’Ibelieve，’hesaid，’ifIcouldSEE Ishouldspotwhatwaswrongatonce。’Andhedid。’_I_know，’ hesaid。’Whatdoyouknow？’saidI。’_I_know，’herepeated。 Thenhesaid，peevishly，’ICAN’Tdoitifyoulookatme——IreallyCAN’T；it’sbeenthat，partly，allalong。I’msuchanervousfellowthatyouputmeout。’Well，wehadabitofanargument。NaturallyIwantedtosee；buthewasasobstinateasamule，andsuddenlyIhadcomeoverastiredasadog——hetiredmeout。’Allright，’ Isaid，’_I_won’tlookatyou，’andturnedtowardsthemirror，onthewardrobe，bythebed。 Hestartedoffveryfast。Itriedtofollowhimbylookinginthelooking-glass，toseejustwhatitwashadhung。Roundwenthisarmsandhishands，so，andso，andso，andthenwitharushcametothelastgestureofall——youstanderectandopenoutyourarms——andso，don’tyouknow，hestood。Andthenhedidn’t！Hedidn’t！ Hewasn’t！Iwheeledroundfromthelooking-glasstohim。TherewasnothinglIwasalone，withtheflaringcandlesandastaggeringmind。 Whathadhappened？Hadanythinghappened？HadIbeendreaming？…… Andthen，withanabsurdnoteoffinalityaboutit，theclockuponthelandingdiscoveredthemomentwasripeforstrikingONE。So！——Ping！ AndIwasasgraveandsoberasajudge，withallmychampagneandwhiskygoneintothevastserene。Feelingqueer，youknow——confoundedlyQUEER！Queer！GoodLord！“ Heregardedhiscigar-ashforamoment。“That’sallthathappened，“hesaid。 “Andthenyouwenttobed？“askedEvans。 “Whatelsewastheretodo？“ IlookedWishintheeye。Wewantedtoscoff，andtherewassomething，somethingperhapsinClayton’svoiceandmanner，thathamperedourdesire。 “Andaboutthesepasses？“saidSanderson。 “IbelieveIcoulddothemnow。“ “Oh！“saidSanderson，andproducedapenknifeandsethimselftogrubthedotteloutofthebowlofhisclay。 “Whydon’tyoudothemnow？“saidSanderson，shuttinghispen-knifewithaclick。 “That’swhatI’mgoingtodo，“saidClayton。 “Theywon’twork，“saidEvans。 “Iftheydo——“Isuggested。 “Youknow，I’dratheryoudidn’t，“saidWish，stretchingouthislegs。 “Why？“askedEvans。 “I’dratherhedidn’t，“saidWish。 “Buthehasn’tgot’emright，“saidSanderson，pluggingtoomuchtobaccoinhispipe。 “Allthesame，I’dratherhedidn’t，“saidWish。 WearguedwithWish。HesaidthatforClaytontogothroughthosegestureswaslikemockingaseriousmatter。“Butyoudon’tbelieve——？“ Isaid。WishglancedatClayton，whowasstaringintothefire，weighingsomethinginhismind。“Ido——morethanhalf，anyhow，Ido，“saidWish。 “Clayton，“saidI，“you’retoogoodaliarforus。Mostofitwasallright。Butthatdisappearance……happenedtobeconvincing。 Tellus，it’sataleofcockandbull。“ Hestoodupwithoutheedingme，tookthemiddleofthehearthrug，andfacedme。Foramomentheregardedhisfeetthoughtfully，andthenforalltherestofthetimehiseyeswereontheoppositewall，withanintentexpression。Heraisedhistwohandsslowlytothelevelofhiseyesandsobegan…… Now，SandersonisaFreemason，amemberofthelodgeoftheFourKings，whichdevotesitselfsoablytothestudyandelucidationofallthemysteriesofMasonrypastandpresent，andamongthestudentsofthislodgeSandersonisbynomeanstheleast。HefollowedClayton’smotionswithasingularinterestinhisreddisheye。“That’snotbad，“hesaid，whenitwasdone。“Youreallydo，youknow，putthingstogether，Clayton，inamostamazingfashion。Butthere’sonelittledetailout。“ “Iknow，“saidClayton。“IbelieveIcouldtellyouwhich。“ “Well？“ “This，“saidClayton，anddidaqueerlittletwistandwrithingandthrustofthehands。 “Yes。“ “That，youknow，waswhatHEcouldn’tgetright，“saidClayton。 “ButhowdoYOU——？“ “Mostofthisbusiness，andparticularlyhowyouinventedit，Idon’tunderstandatall，“saidSanderson，“butjustthatphase——Ido。“ Hereflected。“Thesehappentobeaseriesofgestures——connectedwithacertainbranchofesotericMasonry。Probablyyouknow。 Orelse——HOW？“Hereflectedstillfurther。“IdonotseeIcandoanyharmintellingyoujustthepropertwist。Afterall，ifyouknow，youknow；ifyoudon’t，youdon’t。“ “Iknownothing，“saidClayton，“exceptwhatthepoordevilletoutlastnight。“ “Well，anyhow，“saidSanderson，andplacedhischurchwardenverycarefullyupontheshelfoverthefireplace。Thenveryrapidlyhegesticulatedwithhishands。 “So？“saidClayton，repeating。 “So，“saidSanderson，andtookhispipeinhandagain。 “Ah，NOW，“saidClayton，“Icandothewholething——right。“ Hestoodupbeforethewaningfireandsmiledatusall。ButIthinktherewasjustalittlehesitationinhissmile。“IfIbegin——“ hesaid。 “Iwouldn’tbegin，“saidWish。 “It’sallright！“saidEvans。“Matterisindestructible。Youdon’tthinkanyjiggery-pokeryofthissortisgoingtosnatchClaytonintotheworldofshades。Notit！Youmaytry，Clayton，sofarasI’mconcerned，untilyourarmsdropoffatthewrists。“ “Idon’tbelievethat，“saidWish，andstoodupandputhisarmonClayton’sshoulder。“You’vemademehalfbelieveinthatstorysomehow，andIdon’twanttoseethethingdone！“ “Goodness！“saidI，“here’sWishfrightened！“ “Iam，“saidWish，withrealoradmirablyfeignedintensity。“I believethatifhegoesthroughthesemotionsrighthe’llGO。“ “He’llnotdoanythingofthesort，“Icried。“There’sonlyonewayoutofthisworldformen，andClaytonisthirtyyearsfromthat。