第15章

类别:其他 作者:Jane Addams字数:4072更新时间:18/12/27 08:59:40
ThenMatryó;najoinedin。Shewonderedwhothiswomanwas,andwhosethechildrenwere,soshesaid:’Arenotyoutheirmother,then?’ ’No,mygoodwoman,Iamneithertheirmothernoranyrelationtothem。 Theywerequitestrangerstome,butIadoptedthem。’ ’Theyarenotyourchildrenandyetyouaresofondofthem?’ ’HowcanIhelpbeingfondofthem?Ifedthembothatmyownbreasts。 Ihadachildofmyown,butGodtookhim。IwasnotsofondofhimasInowamofthem。’ ’Thenwhosechildrenarethey?’ Thewoman,havingbeguntalking,toldthemthewholestory。 ’Itisaboutsixyearssincetheirparentsdied,bothinoneweek:theirfatherwasburiedontheTuesday,andtheirmotherdiedontheFriday。Theseorphanswerebornthreedaysaftertheirfather’sdeath,andtheirmotherdidnotliveanotherday。MyhusbandandIwerethenlivingaspeasantsinthevillage。Wewereneighboursoftheirs,ouryardbeingnexttotheirs。Theirfatherwasalonelyman;awood-cutterintheforest。Whenfellingtreesoneday,theyletonefallonhim。Itfellacrosshisbodyandcrushedhisbowelsout。TheyhardlygothimhomebeforehissoulwenttoGod;andthatsameweekhiswifegavebirthtotwins——theselittlegirls。Shewaspoorandalone;shehadnoone,youngorold,withher。Aloneshegavethembirth,andaloneshemetherdeath。 ’ThenextmorningIwenttoseeher,butwhenIenteredthehut,she,poorthing,wasalreadystarkandcold。Indyingshehadrolledontothischildandcrushedherleg。Thevillagefolkcametothehutwashedthebody,laidherout,madeacoffin,andburiedher。Theyweregoodfolk。Thebabieswereleftalone。Whatwastobedonewiththem?Iwastheonlywomantherewhohadababyatthetime。Iwasnursingmyfirst-born——eightweeksold。SoItookthemforatime。Thepeasantscametogether,andthoughtandthoughtwhattodowiththem,andatlasttheysaidtome:“Forthepresent,Mary,youhadbetterkeepthegirls,andlateronwewillarrangewhattodoforthem。“ SoInursedthesoundoneatmybreast,butatfirstIdidnotfeedthiscrippledone。Ididnotsupposeshewouldlive。ButthenIthoughttomyself,whyshouldthepoorinnocentsuffer?I pitiedher,andbegantofeedher。AndsoIfedmyownboyandthesetwo——thethreeofthem——atmyownbreast。Iwasyoungandstrong,andhadgoodfood,andGodgavemesomuchmilkthatattimesitevenoverflowed。Iusedsometimestofeedtwoatatime,whilethethirdwaswaiting。WhenonehadhadenoughInursedthethird。AndGodsoordereditthatthesegrewup,whilemyownwasburiedbeforehewastwoyearsold。AndI hadnomorechildren,thoughweprospered。Nowmyhusbandisworkingforthecornmerchantatthemill。Thepayisgoodandwearewelloff。ButIhavenochildrenofmyown,andhowlonelyIshouldbewithouttheselittlegirls!HowcanIhelplovingthem!Theyarethejoyofmylife!’ Shepressedthelamelittlegirltoherwithonehandwhilewiththeothershewipedthetearsfromhercheeks。 AndMatryó;nasighed,andsaid:’Theproverbistruethatsays,“Onemaylivewithoutfatherormother,butonecannotlivewithoutGod。“’ Sotheytalkedtogether,whensuddenlythewholehutwaslightedupasthoughbysummerlightningfromthecornerwhereMichaelsat。Theyalllookedtowardshimandsawhimsitting,hishandsfoldedonhisknees,gazingupwardsandsmiling。 Thewomanwentawaywiththegirls。Michaelrosefromthebench,putdownhiswork,andtookoffhisapron。Then,bowinglowtoSimonandhiswife,hesaid:’Farewell,masters。Godhasforgivenme。Iaskyourforgiveness,too,foranythingdoneamiss。’ AndtheysawthatalightshonefromMichael。AndSimonrose,boweddowntoMichael,andsaid:’Isee,Michael,thatyouarenocommonman,andIcanneitherkeepyounorquestionyou。Onlytellmethis:howisitthatwhenIfoundyouandbroughtyouhome,youweregloomy,andwhenmywifegaveyoufoodyousmiledatherandbecamebrighter?Thenwhenthegentlemancametoordertheboots,yousmiledagainandbecamebrighterstill?Andnow,whenthiswomanbroughtthelittlegirls,yousmiledathirdtime,andhavebecomeasbrightasday?Tellme,Michael,whydoesyourfaceshineso,andwhydidyousmilethosethreetimes?’ AndMichaelanswered:’LightshinesfrommebecauseIhavebeenpunished,butnowGodhaspardonedme。AndIsmiledthreetimes,becauseGodsentmetolearnthreetruths,andIhavelearntthem。OneIlearntwhenyourwifepitiedmeandthatiswhyIsmiledthefirsttime。ThesecondIlearntwhentherichmanorderedthebootsandthenIsmiledagain。Andnow,whenI sawthoselittlegirls,Ilearntthethirdandlasttruth,andIsmiledthethirdtime。’ AndSimonsaid,’Tellme,Michael,whatdidGodpunishyoufor?andwhatwerethethreetruths?thatI,too,mayknowthem。’ AndMichaelanswered:’GodpunishedmefordisobeyingHim。IwasanangelinheavenanddisobeyedGod。Godsentmetofetchawoman’ssoul。Iflewtoearth,andsawasickwomanlyingalone,whohadjustgivenbirthtotwingirls。Theymovedfeeblyattheirmother’sside,butshecouldnotliftthemtoherbreast。 Whenshesawme,sheunderstoodthatGodhadsentmeforhersoul,andsheweptandsaid:“AngelofGod!Myhusbandhasjustbeenburied,killedbyafallingtree。Ihaveneithersister,noraunt,normother:noonetocareformyorphans。Donottakemysoul!Letmenursemybabes,feedthem,andsetthemontheirfeetbeforeIdie。Childrencannotlivewithoutfatherormother。“AndIhearkenedtoher。Iplacedonechildatherbreastandgavetheotherintoherarms,andreturnedtotheLordinheaven。IflewtotheLord,andsaid:“Icouldnottakethesoulofthemother。Herhusbandwaskilledbyatree;thewomanhastwins,andpraysthathersoulmaynotbetaken。Shesays: ’Letmenurseandfeedmychildren,andsetthemontheirfeet。Childrencannotlivewithoutfatherormother。’Ihavenottakenhersoul。“AndGodsaid:“Go——takethemother’ssoul,andlearnthreetruths:LearnWhatdwellsinman,Whatisnotgiventoman,andWhatmenliveby。Whenthouhastlearntthesethings,thoushaltreturntoheaven。“SoIflewagaintoearthandtookthemother’ssoul。Thebabesdroppedfromherbreasts。Herbodyrolledoveronthebedandcrushedonebabe,twistingitsleg。Iroseabovethevillage,wishingtotakehersoultoGod; butawindseizedme,andmywingsdroopedanddroppedoff。 HersoulrosealonetoGod,whileIfelltoearthbytheroadside。’ AndSimonandMatryó;naunderstoodwhoitwasthathadlivedwiththem,andwhomtheyhadclothedandfed。Andtheyweptwithaweandwithjoy。Andtheangelsaid:’Iwasaloneinthefield,naked。Ihadneverknownhumanneeds,coldandhunger,tillIbecameaman。Iwasfamished,frozen,anddidnotknowwhattodo。Isaw,nearthefieldIwasin,ashrinebuiltforGod,andIwenttoithopingtofindshelter。Buttheshrinewaslocked,andIcouldnotenter。SoIsatdownbehindtheshrinetosheltermyselfatleastfromthewind。Eveningdrewon。Iwashungry,frozen,andinpain。SuddenlyIheardamancomingalongtheroad。Hecarriedapairofboots,andwastalkingtohimself。ForthefirsttimesinceIbecameamanIsawthemortalfaceofaman,andhisfaceseemedterribletomeandIturnedfromit。AndIheardthemantalkingtohimselfofhowtocoverhisbodyfromthecoldinwinter,andhowtofeedwifeandchildren。AndIthought: “Iamperishingofcoldandhunger,andhereisamanthinkingonlyofhowtoclothehimselfandhiswife,andhowtogetbreadforthemselves。Hecannothelpme。Whenthemansawmehefrownedandbecamestillmoreterrible,andpassedmebyontheotherside。Idespaired,butsuddenlyIheardhimcomingback。Ilookedup,anddidnotrecognizethesameman:before,Ihadseendeathinhisface;butnowhewasalive,andIrecognizedinhimthepresenceofGod。Hecameuptome,clothedme,tookmewithhimandbroughtmetohishome。I enteredthehouseawomancametomeetusandbegantospeak。Thewomanwasstillmoreterriblethanthemanhadbeen; thespiritofdeathcamefromhermouth;Icouldnotbreatheforthestenchofdeaththatspreadaroundher。Shewishedtodrivemeoutintothecold,andIknewthatifshedidsoshewoulddie。 SuddenlyherhusbandspoketoherofGod,andthewomanchangedatonce。Andwhenshebroughtmefoodandlookedatme,Iglancedatherandsawthatdeathnolongerdweltinher; shehadbecomealive,andinhertooIsawGod。 ’ThenIrememberedthefirstlessonGodhadsetme:“Learnwhatdwellsinman。“AndIunderstoodthatinmandwellsLove! IwasgladthatGodhadalreadybeguntoshowmewhatHehadpromised,andIsmiledforthefirsttime。ButIhadnotyetlearntall。IdidnotyetknowWhatisnotgiventoman,andWhatmenliveby。 ’Ilivedwithyou,andayearpassed。Amancametoorderbootsthatshouldwearforayearwithoutlosingshapeorcracking。I lookedathim,andsuddenly,behindhisshoulder,Isawmycomrade——theangelofdeath。Nonebutmesawthatangel;butI knewhim,andknewthatbeforethesunsethewouldtakethatrichman’ssoul。AndIthoughttomyself,“Themanismakingpreparationsforayear,anddoesnotknowthathewilldiebeforeevening。“AndIrememberedGod’ssecondsaying,“Learnwhatisnotgiventoman。“ ’WhatdwellsinmanIalreadyknew。NowIlearntwhatisnotgivenhim。 Itisnotgiventomantoknowhisownneeds。AndI smiledforthesecondtime。Iwasgladtohaveseenmycomradeangel——gladalsothatGodhadrevealedtomethesecondsaying。