Whilehewascomingup，LordIpsdenwaslecturingMarshalSaundersonapointonwhichthatworthyhadalwaysthoughthimselfverysuperiortohismaster——\"Gentlemanlydeportment.\"
\"Now，Saunders，mindandbehavelikeagentleman，orweshallbefoundout.\"
\"Itrust，mylord，myconduct——\"
\"WhatImeanis，youmustnotbesooverpoweringlygentleman—likeasyouareapttobe;nogentlemanissogentlemanasallthat;itcouldnotbeborne，_c’estsuffoquant;_andawhitehandkerchiefisunsoldier—like，andnobodytiesawhitehandkerchiefsowellasthat;ofallthevices，perfectionisthemostintolerable.\"Hislordshipthentouchedwithhiscanethegeneralissimo’stie，whosecountenancestraightwayfell，asthoughhehadlostthreesuccessivebattles.
Gattycameup.
Theysaluted.
\"Whereisyoursecond，sir？\"saidthemare’chal.
\"Mysecond？\"saidGatty.\"Ah！Iforgottowakehim——doesitmatter？\"
\"Itismerelyacustom，\"saidLordIpsden，withaveryslightlysatiricalmanner.\"Savanadero，\"saidhe，\"dousthehonortomeasuretheground，andbeeverybody’ssecond.\"
Savanaderomeasuredtheground，andhandedapistoltoeachcombatant，andstruckanimposingattitudeapart.
\"Areyouready，gentlemen？\"saidthisJack—o’—both—sides.
\"Yes！\"saidboth.
Justasthesignalwasabouttobegiven，aninterruptionoccurred.\"I
begyourpardon，sir，\"saidLordIpsdentohisantagonist;\"Iamgoingtotakea_liberty——agreatliberty_withyou，butIthinkyouwillfindyourpistolisonlyathalfcock.\"
\"Thankyou，mylord;whatamItodowiththething？\"
\"Drawbackthecockso，andbereadytofire？\"
\"So？\"_Bang！_
Hehadtouchedthetriggeraswellasthecock，sooffwentthebarker;
andafteraconsiderablepausethefield—marshalsprangyellingintotheair.
\"Hallo！\"criedMr.Gatty.
\"Ah！oh！I’madeadman，\"whinedthegeneral.
\"Nonsense！\"saidIpsden，afteramomentofanxiety.\"Giveyourselfnoconcern，sir，\"saidhe，soothingly，tohisantagonist——\"amereaccident.
Mare’chal，reloadMr.Gatty’spistol.\"
\"Excuseme，mylord——\"
\"Loadhispistoldirectly，\"saidhislordship，sternly;\"andbehavelikeagentleman.\"
\"Mylord！mylord！butwhereshallIstandtobesafe？\"
\"Behindme！\"
ThecommanderofdivisionadvancedreluctantlyforGatty’spistol.
\"No，mylord！\"saidGatty，\"itisplainIamnotafitantagonist;I
shallbutexposemyself——andmymotherhasseparatedus;Ihavelosther——ifyoudonotwinhersomeworsemanmay;but，oh！ifyouareaman，usehertenderly.\"
\"Whom？\"
\"ChristieJohnstone！Oh，sir，donotmakeherregretmetoomuch！Shewasmytreasure，myconsolation——shewastobemywife，shewouldhavecheeredtheroadoflife——itisadesertnow.Ilovedher——I——I——\"
Herethepoorfellowchoked.
LordIpsdenturnedround，andthrewhispistoltoSaunders，saying，\"Catchthat，Saunders.\"
Saunders，onthecontrary，byasinglemotionchangedhispersonfromaverticalstraightlinetoahorizontallineexactlyparallelwiththeearth’ssurface，andtheweaponsanginnoxiousoverhim.
Hislordshipthen，withanobledefianceofetiquette，walkeduptohisantagonistandgavehimhishand，withamotionnoonecouldresist;forhefeltforthepoorfellow.
\"Itisallamistake，\"saidhe.\"ThereisnosentimentbetweenLaJohnstoneandmebutmutualesteem.Iwillexplainthewholething._I_
admire_her_forhervirtue，herwit，herinnocence，hergoodnessandallthatsortofthing;and_she，_what_she_seesin_me，_IamsureIdon’tknow，\"addedhe，slightlyshrugginghisaristocraticshoulders.\"DomethehonortobreakfastwithmeatNewhaven.\"
\"Ihaveorderedtwelvesortsoffishatthe’Peacock，’mylord，\"saidSaunders.
\"Divine！（Ihatefish）ItoldSaundersallwouldbehungryandnoneshot;
bytheby，youarewinged，Ithinkyousaid，Saunders？\"
\"No，mylord！butlookatmytrousers.\"
Thebullethadcuthispantaloons.
\"Isee——onlybarked;sogoandseeaboutourbreakfast.\"
\"Yes，mylord\"_（faintly）._
\"Anddrawonmeforfiftypounds’worthof——newtrousers.\"
Yes，mylord\"_（sonorously）._
Theduelistsseparated，GattytakingtheshortcuttoNewhaven;heproposedtotakehisfavoriteswimthere，torefreshhimselfbeforebreakfast;andhewentfromhislordshipalittlecheeredbyremarkswhichfellfromhim，andwhich，thoughvague，soundedfriendly——poorfellow，exceptwhenhehadabrushinhandhewasadreamer.
Thisviscount，whodidnotseemtotroublehisheadaboutclassdignity，wastoconverthismotherfromheraristocratictendenciesorsomething.
_Quesais—je？_whatwillnotadreamerhope？
LordIpsdenstrolledalongthesands，andjudgehissurprise，when，attendedbytwofootmen，hemetatthattimeinthemorningLadyBarbaraSinclairLordIpsdenhadbeensodisheartenedandpiquedbythislady’sconductthatforawholeweekhehadnotbeennearher.Thislineofbehaviorsometimesanswers.
Shemethimwithagranddisplayofcordiality.
Sheinquired，\"Whetherhehadheardofamostgallantaction，that，coupledwithanothercircumstance\"_（hereshesmiled），_\"hadinpartreconciledhertotheagewelivein？\"
Heaskedforfurtherparticulars.
Shetheninformedhim\"thatashiphadbeenashoreontherocks，thatnofishermandaredventureout，thatayounggentlemanhadgiventhemhiswholefortune，andsobribedthemtoaccompanyhim;thathehadsavedtheshipandthemen’slives，paidawayhisfortune，andlightedanodiouscigarandgonehome，neverminding，amidtheblessingsandacclamationsofamaritimepopulation.\"
Abeautifulstoryshetoldhim;sobeautiful，infact，thatuntilshehaddiscoursedtenminuteshehardlyrecognizedhisownfeat;butwhenhedidheblushedinsideaswellasoutwithpleasure.Oh！musicofmusic——praisefromeloquentlips，andthoselipsthelipswelove.
Thenextmomenthefeltashamed;ashamedthatLadyBarbarashouldpraisehimbeyondhismerits，asheconceived.
Hemadeafainthypocriticalendeavortomoderatehereulogium;thisgavemattersanunexpectedturn，LadyBarbara’seyesflasheddefiance.
\"Isayitwasanobleaction，thatonenursedineffeminacy（asyouallare）shouldteachthehardyseamentomockatperil——noblefellow！\"
\"Hedidaman’sduty，Barbara.\"
\"Ipsden，takecare，youwillmakemehateyou，ifyoudetractfromadeedyoucannotemulate.Thisgentlemanriskedhisownlifetosaveothers——heisahero！IshouldknowhimbyhisfacethemomentIsawhim.Oh，thatI
weresuchaman，orknewwheretofindsuchacreature！\"
ThewatercameintoLordIpsden’seyes;hedidnotknowwhattosayordo;heturnedawayhishead.LadyBarbarawassurprised;herconsciencesmoteher.
\"Oh，dear，\"saidshe，\"therenow，Ihavegivenyoupain——forgiveme;wecan’tallbeheroes;dearIpsden，don’tthinkIdespiseyounowasI
used.Oh，no！Ihaveheardofyourgoodnesstothepoor，andIhavemoreexperiencenow.ThereisnobodyIesteemmorethanyou，Richard，soyouneednotlookso.\"
\"Thankyou，dearestBarbara.\"
\"Yes，andifyouweretobesuchagooseastowritemeanotherletterproposingabsurditiestome——\"
\"Wouldtheanswerbedifferent？\"
\"Verydifferent.\"
\"Oh，Barbara，wouldyouaccept？\"
\"Why，ofcoursenot;butIwouldrefusecivilly！\"
\"Ah！\"
\"There，don’tsigh;Ihateasighingman.I’lltellyousomethingthatI
knowwillmakeyoulaugh.\"Shethensmiledsaucilyinhisface，andsaid，\"DoyourememberMr.————？\"
_L’effronte’e！_thiswastheearnestman.ButIpsdenwasamatchforherthistime.\"IthinkIdo，\"saidhe;\"agentlemanwhowantstomakeJohnBulllittleagainintoJohnCalf;butitwon’tdo.\"
Herladyshiplaughed.\"WhydidyounottellusthatonInchCoombe？\"
\"BecauseIhadnotread_TheCatspaw_then.\"
_\"TheCatspaw？_Ah！Ithoughtitcouldnotbeyou.Whoseisit？\"
\"Mr.Jerrold’s.\"
\"ThenMr.Jerroldisclevererthanyou.\"
\"Itispossible.\"
\"Itiscertain！Well，Mr.JerroldandLordIpsden，youwillbothbegladtohearthatitwas，inpointoffact，abullthatconfutedtheadvocateoftheMiddleAges;wewerewalking;hewastellingmemanhoodwasextinctexceptinafewearnestmenwholiveduponthepast，itsassociations，itstruth;whenahorridbullgave——oh——suchabellow！andcametrottingup.Iscreamedandran——Iremembernothingbutarrivingatthestile，andlo，ontheotherside，offeringmehisarmwith_empressment_acrossthewoodenbarrierwas——\"
\"Well？\"
\"Well！don’tyousee？\"
\"No——oh——yes，Isee！——fancy——ah！ShallItellyouhowhecametogetfirstover？Heranmoreearnestlythanyou.\"
’ItisnotMr.Jerroldthistime，Ipresume，\"saidhersatiricalladyship.
\"No！youcannotalwayshavehim.Iventuretopredictyourladyshiponyourreturnhomegavethismediaevalpersonagehis_conge’.\"_
\"No！\"
\"No？\"
\"Igaveithimatthestile！Letusbeserious，ifyouplease;Ihaveaconfidencetomakeyou，Ipsden.Frankly，Ioweyousomeapologyformyconductoflate;Imeanttobereserved——Ihavebeenrude——butyoushalljudgeme.Ayearagoyoumademesomeproposals;Irejectedthembecause，thoughIlikeyou——\"
\"Youlikeme？\"
\"Idetestyourcharacter.Sincethen，myWestIndiaestatehasbeenturnedintospecie;thatspecie，thebulkofmyfortune，placedonboardavessel;thatvessellost，atleastwethinkso——shehasnotbeenheardof.\"
\"Mydearcousin.\"
\"DoyoucomprehendthatnowIamcoolerthanevertoallyounggentlemenwhohavelargeincomes，and\"（holdingoutherhandlikeanangel）\"Imusttroubleyoutoforgiveme.\"
Hekissedherlovelyhand.
\"Iesteemyoumoreandmore，\"saidhe.\"Youought，forithasbeenahardstruggletomenottoadoreyou，becauseyouaresoimproved，_moncousin.\"_
\"Isitpossible？Inwhatrespect？\"
\"Youarebrownerandcharitabler;andIshouldhavebeenverykindtoyou——mawkishlykind，Ifear，mysweetcousin，ifthiswretchedmoneyhadnotgonedowninthe_Tisbe.\"_
\"Hallo！\"criedtheviscount.
\"Ah！\"squeakedLadyBarbara，unusedtosuchinterjections.
\"Gonedowninwhat？\"saidIpsden，inaloudvoice.
\"Don’tbellowinpeople’sears.The_Tisbe，_stupid，\"criedshe，screamingatthetopofhervoice.
\"Ritum，titurn，titum，tum，tum，tiddy，iddy，\"wentLordIpsden——hewhistledapolka.
_LadyBarbara（inspectinghimgravely）._\"Ihavehearditatadistance，butIneversawhowitwasdonebefore._Itisvery，verypretty！！！！\"_
_Ipsden.\"Polkez—vous，madame？\"_
_LadyBarb.\"Si，jepolke，MonsieurleVicomte.\"_
Theypolkedforasecondortwo.
\"Well，IdaresayIamwrong，\"criedLadyBarbara，\"butIlikeyoubetternowyouareadownright——ahem！——thanwhenyouwereonlyaninsipidnon—intellectual——youaregreatlyimproved.\"
_Ips._\"Inwhatrespects？’
_LadyBarb._\"DidInottellyou？brownerandmoreimpudent;buttellme，\"saidshe，resuminghersly，satiricaltone，\"howisitthatyou，whousedtobethepinkofcourtesy，danceandsingoverthewreckofmyfortunes？\"
\"Becausetheyarenotwrecked.\"
\"IthoughtItoldyoumyspecieisgonedowninthe_Tisbe.\"_
_Ipsden._\"Butthe_Tisbe_hasnotgonedown.\"
_LadyBarb._\"Itellyouitis.\"
_Ipsden._\"Iassureyouitisnot.\"
_LadyBarb._\"Itisnot？\"
_Ipsden._\"Barbara！Iamtoohappy，Ibegintonourishsuchsweethopesoncemore.Oh，Icouldfallonmykneesandblessyouforsomethingyousaidjustnow.\"
LadyBarbarablushedtothetemples.
\"Thenwhydon’tyou？\"saidshe.\"Allyouwantisalittleenthusiasm.\"
Thenrecoveringherself，shesaid：
\"Youkneelonwetsand，withblacktrouserson;thatwillneverbe！！！\"
Thesetwoweresooccupiedthattheydidnotobservetheapproachofastrangeruntilhebrokeinupontheirdialogue.
AnAncientMarinerhadbeenforsomeminutesstandingoffandon，reconnoiteringLordIpsden;henowboredown，andwithgreatrough，roaringcordiality，thatmadeLadyBarbarastart，criedout：
\"Givemeyourhand，sir——givemeyourhand，ifyouweretwicealord.
\"Icouldn’tspeaktoyoutillthebrigwassafeinport，andyouslippedaway，butI’vebroughtyouupatlast;and——givemeyourhandagain，sir.
Isay，isn’titapityyouarealordinsteadofasailor？\"
_Ipsden._\"ButIamasailor.\"
_AncientMariner._\"Thatyeare，andassmartaoneasevertiedatrue—lover’sknotinthetop;buttellthetruth——youwerenevernearerlosingthenumberofyourmessthanthatdayintheold_Tisbe.\"_
_LadyBarb._\"Theold_Tisbe！_Oh！\"
_Ipsden._\"Doyourememberthatnicelittlelurchshegavetoleewardaswebroughtherround？\"
_LadyBarb._\"Oh，Richard！\"
_AncientMariner._\"Andthatreeltheoldwenchgaveunderourfeet，norththepier—head.Iwouldn’thavegivenawashing—tubforheratthatmoment.\"
_Ipsden._\"Pastdangerbecomespleasure，sir._Olimethoecmeminisse_——I
begyourpardon，sir.\"
_AncientMariner（takingoffhishatwithfeeling）._\"Godblessye，sir，andsendyemanyhappydays，andwellspent，withtheprettyladyIseealongside;askingyourpardon，miss，forpartingpleasantercompany——soI’llsheeroff.\"
Andawaywenttheskipperofthe_Tisbe，_rollingfearfully.Intheheatofthisreminiscence，theskipperoftheyacht（theyareallalike，bluewateroncefairlytasted）hadlostsightofLadyBarbara;henowlookedround.Imaginehissurprise！
Herladyshipwasintears.
\"DearBarbara，\"saidLordIpsden，\"donotdistressyourselfonmyaccount.\"
\"Itisnotyourfe—feelingsIcareabout;atleast，Ih—h—hopenot;butI
havebeensounjust，andIpridedmyselfsoonmyj—ju—justice.\"
\"Nevermind！\"
\"Oh！ifyoudon’t，Idon’t.Ihatemyself，soitisnowonderyouh—hateme.\"
\"Iloveyoumorethanever.\"
\"Thenyouareagoodsoul！OfcourseyouknowIalways_l_—esteemedyou，Richard.\"
\"No！Ihadanideayoudespisedme！\"
\"Howsillyyouare！Can’tyousee？WhenIthoughtyouwerenotperfection，whichyouarenow，itvexedmetodeath;youneversawmeaffrontanyonebutyou？\"
\"No，Ineverdid！Whatdoesthatprove？\"
\"Thatdependsuponthewitofhimthatreasonsthereon.\"（Comingtoherself.）
\"Iloveyou，Barbara！Willyouhonormewithyourhand？\"
\"No！Iamnotsobase，soselfish.Youareworthahundredofme，andherehaveIbeentreatingyou_dehautenbas._DearRichard，poorRichard.Oh！oh！oh！\"（Aperfectfloodoftears.）
\"Barbara！Iregretnothing;thismomentpaysforall.\"
\"Well，then，Iwill！sinceyoukeeppressingme.There，letmego;Imustbealone;ImusttelltheseahowunjustIwas，andhowhappyIam，andwhenyouseemeagainyoushallseethebettersideofyourcousinBarbara.\"
Shewasperemptory.\"Shehadherfollyandhismeritstothinkover，\"shesaid;butshepromisedtopassthroughNewhaven，andheshouldputherintoherpony—phaeton，whichwouldmeetherthere.
LadyBarbarawasonlyafoolbytheexcessofherwitoverherexperience;andLordIpsden’slovewasnotmisplaced，forshehadagreatheartwhichshehidfromlittlepeople.Iforgiveher！
Theresolutionssheformedincompanywiththesea，havingdismissedIpsden，andorderedherflunkyintothehorizon，willprobablygiveourviscountjusthalfacenturyofconjugalbliss.
Ashewasgoingshestoppedhimandsaid：\"YourfriendhadbrownerhandsthanIhavehithertoconceivedpossible._Totellthetruth，_Itookthemfortheclawsofamahoganytablewhenhegrappledyou——isthattheterm？
_C’este’gal_——Ilikehim——\"
Shestoppedhimagain.\"Ipsden，inthemidstofallthisthatpoorman’sshipisbroken.Ifeelitis！Youwillbuyhimanother，ifyoureallyloveme——forIlikehim.\"
Andsotheseloverspartedforatime;andLordIpsdenwithaboundingheartreturnedtoNewhaven.Hewenttoentertainhislate_vis—’a—vis_atthe\"Peacock.\"
Meantimeashorterandlesspleasant_rencontre_hadtakenplacebetweenLeithandthatvillage.
Gattyfeltheshouldmeethislostsweetheart;andsureenough，ataturnoftheroadChristieandJeancamesuddenlyuponhim.
Jeannodded，butChristietooknonoticeofhim;theypassedhim;heturnedandfollowedthem，andsaid，\"Christie！\"
\"Whatisyourwillwi’me？\"saidshe，coldly.
\"I——I——Howpaleyouare！\"
\"Iamnoveryweel.\"
\"Shehasbeenwatchingovermucklewi’Flucker，\"saidJean.
Christiethankedherwithalook.
\"Ihopeitisnot——not——\"
\"Naefears，lad，\"saidshe，briskly;\"Idinnathinkthatmuckleo’ye.\"
\"AndIthinkofnothingbutyou，\"saidhe.
Adeepflushcrimsonedtheyoungwoman’sbrow，butsherestrainedherself，andsaidicily：\"Thaat’sverygudeo’ye，I’msure.\"
Gattyfeltallthecontempthermannersandwordsexpressed.Hebithislips.Thetearstartedtohiseye.\"Youwillforgetme，\"saidhe.\"Idonotdeservetoberemembered，butIshallneverforgetyou.IleaveforEngland.IleaveNewhavenforever，whereIhavebeensohappy.Iamgoingatthreeo’clockbythesteamboat.Won’tyoubidmegood—by？\"Heapproachedhertimidly.
\"Ay！thatwulldo，\"criedshe;\"Gudebewi’ye，lad;Iwishyenaeill.\"
Shegaveacommandinggestureofdismissal;heturnedaway，andwentsadlyfromher.Shewatchedeverymotionwhenhisbackwasturned.
\"Thatisyou，Christie，\"saidJean;\"usetheladslikedirt，an’theythinka’themairo’ye.\"
\"Oh，Jean，myhairt’sbroken.I’mjustdeeingforhim.\"
\"Letmespeaktillhimthen，\"saidJean;\"I’llsunebringhimtillhismarrow—banes;\"andshetookahastysteptofollowhim.
Christieheldherfast.\"I’ddeeereI’dgiveintillthem.Oh，Jean！I’malassiecleanflungawa;hehasneitherhairtnorspunkava，yonlad！\"
Jeanbegantomakeexcusesforhim.Christieinveighedagainsthim.Jeanspokeupforhimwithmoreearnestness.
Nowobserve，Jeandespisedthepoorboy.
Christieadoredhim.
SoJeanspokeforhim，becausewomenofeverydegreeareoftenonesolidmassoftact;andChristieabusedhim，becauseshewantedtohearhimdefended.
CHAPTERXVI.
RICHARD，LORDVISCOUNTIPSDEN，havingdottedtheseashorewithsentinels，totellhimofLadyBarbara’sapproach，awaitedhisguestinthe\"Peacock\";but，asGattywasalittlebehindtime，heplacedSaunderssentineloverthe\"Peacock，\"andstrolledeastward;ashecameoutofthe\"Peacock，\"Mrs.Gattycamedownthelittlehillinfront，andalsoproceededeastward;meantimeLadyBarbaraandherescortwerenotfarfromtheNewTownofNewhaven，ontheirwayfromLeith.
Mrs.Gattycamedown，merelywithavaguefear.Shehadnoreasontosupposeherson’salliancewithChristieeitherwouldorcouldberenewed，butshewasacarefulplayerandwouldnotgiveachanceaway;
shefoundhewasgoneoutunusuallyearly，soshecamestraighttotheonlyplaceshedreaded;itwasherson’slastdayinScotland.Shehadpackedhisclothes，andhehadinspiredherwithconfidencebyarrangingpictures，etc.，himself;shehadnoideahewaspackingforhisdeparturefromthislife，notEdinburghonly.
ShecamethentoNewhavenwithnoseriousmisgivings，for，evenifhersonhadagainvacillated，shesawthat，withChristie’sprideandherownfirmness，thegamemustbehersintheend;but，asIsaidbefore，shewasonewhoplayedhercardsclosely，andsuchseldomlose.
Butmystoryiswiththetwoyoungfishwives，who，ontheirreturnfromLeith，foundthemselvesatthefootoftheNewTown，Newhaven，someminutesbeforeanyoftheotherpersonswho，itistobeobserved，wereapproachingitfromdifferentpoints;theycameslowlyin，Christieinparticular，withalistlessnessshehadnever，knowntillthislastweek;
forsomedaysherstrengthhadfailedher——itwasJeanthatcarriedthecreelnow——before，Christie，intheprideofherstrength，wouldalwaysdomorethanhershareoftheirjointlabor.Thenshecouldhardlybeforcedtoeat，andwhatshedideatwasquitetastelesstoher，andsleeplefther，andinitssteadcameuneasyslumbers，fromwhichsheawokequiveringfromheadtofoot.
Oh！perilousventureofthosewholoveoneobjectwiththewholeheart.
Thisgreatbuttenderheartwasbreakingdaybyday.
Well，ChristieandJean，strollingslowlyintotheNewTownofNewhaven，foundanassemblageofthenativesalllookingseaward;thefishermen，exceptSandyListon，wereawayattheherringfishery，butalltheboysandwomenoftheNewTownwerecollected;thegirlsfeltamomentarycuriosity;itproved，however，tobeonlyanindividualswimmingintowardshorefromagreaterdistancethanusual.
Alittlematterexcitescuriosityinsuchplaces.
Theman’sheadlookedlikeaspotofink.
SandyListonwasmindinghisownbusiness，lazilymendingaskait—net，whichhehadattachedtoacrazyoldherring—boathauleduptorot.
Christiesatdown，paleandlanguid，byhim，onacreepiethatalasswhohadbeenbaitingalinewithmusselshadjustvacated;suddenlysheseizedJean’sarmwithaconvulsivemotion;Jeanlookedup——itwastheLondonsteamboatrunningoutfromLeithtoGrantonPiertotakeupherpassengersforLondon.CharlesGattywasgoingbythatboat;thelookofmutedespairthepoorgirlgavewenttoJean’sheart;sheranhastilyfromthegroup，andcriedoutofsightforpoorChristie.
Afishwife，lookingthroughatelescopeattheswimmer，remarked：\"He’scominginfast;he’sagallantswimmer，yon——
\"Canhedee’t？\"inquiredChristieofSandyListon.
\"Finethaat，\"wasthereply;\"hedoesitayeo’Sundayswhenyeareatthekirk.\"
\"It’snoooto’thekirkwindowye’llhaeseenhim，Sandy，mymon，\"saidayoungfishwife.
\"Rinformyglassonyway，Flucker，\"saidChristie，forcingherselftotakesomelittleinterest.
Fluckerbroughtittoher，sheputherhandonhisshoulder，gotslowlyup，andstoodonthecreepieandadjustedthefocusofherglass;afterashortview，shesaidtoFlucker：
\"Rinandseethenook.\"Shethenleveledherglassagainattheswimmer.
Fluckerinformedherthenooksaid\"halfeleven\"——Scotchfor\"halfpastten.\"
Christiewhippedoutawell—thumbedalmanac.
\"Yonnook’sayeahint，\"saidshe.Sheswepttheseaoncemorewithherglass，thenbroughtittogetherwithaclick，andjumpedoffthestool.
Herquickintelligenceviewedthematterdifferentlyfromalltheothers.
\"Noow，\"criedshe，smartly，\"wha’lllendmehisyawl？\"
\"Hets！dinnabesaeinterferin’，lassie，\"saidafishwife.
\"Haenaneo’yeonyspunk？\"saidChristie，takingnonoticeofthewoman.
\"Speak，laddies！\"
\"M’uncle’syawlisatthepier—head;ye’llgether，mywoman，\"saidaboy.
\"Aschell’nforwha’sfirstonboard，\"saidChristie，holdingupthecoin.
\"Comeawa’，Flucker，we’llhaeherschell’n;\"andthesetwoworthiesinstantlyeffectedafalsestart.
\"It’snounderyourjackets，\"saidChristie，asshedashedafterthemlikethewind.
\"Haw！haw！haw！\"laughedSandy.
\"What’sherbusinesspickingupamonagainsthiswill？\"saidawoman.
\"She’sanawfu’lassie，\"whinedanother.Theexaminationoftheswimmerwasthencontinued，andthecrowdincreased;somewouldhaveithewasrapidlyapproaching，othersthathemadelittleornoway.
\"Whaest？\"saidanother.
\"It’salummy，\"saidagirl.
\"Na！it’snoalummy，\"saidanother.
Christie’sboatwasnowseenstandingoutfromthepier.SandyListon，castingacontemptuouslookonalltherest，liftedhimselflazilyintotheherring—boatandlookedseaward.Hismannerchangedinamoment.
\"TheDeevil！\"criedhe;\"thetide’sturned！Youwi’yourglass，couldyounoseeyonman’sdriftingoottosea？\"
\"Hech！\"criedthewomen，\"he’llbedrooned——he’llbedrooned！\"
\"Yes;he’llbedrooned！\"criedSandy，\"ifyonlassiedoesnacomealongsidehimdeevelichquick——he’ssairspent，Idoot.\"
Twospectatorswerenowaddedtothescene，Mrs.GattyandLordIpsden.
Mrs.Gattyinquiredwhatwasthematter.
\"It’samondrooning，\"wasthereply.
Thepoorfellow，whomSandy，byaidofhisglass，nowdiscoveredtobeinawornoutcondition，wasabouthalfamileeastofNewhavenpier—head，andunfortunatelythewindwasnearlydueeast.Christiewasstandingnorth—northeast，herboat—hookjammedagainstthesail，whichstoodasflatasaknife.
ThenativesoftheOldTownwerenowseenpouringdowntothepierandthebeach，andstrangerswerecollectinglikebees.
\"Afterwitiseverybody’swit！！！\"——_OldProverb._
TheaffairwasintheJohnstone’shands.
\"Thatboatisnotgoingtothepoorman，\"saidMrs.Gatty，\"itisturningitsbackuponhim.\"
\"Shecannalieinthewind’seye，forascleverassheis，\"answeredafishwife.
\"Ikenwhaitis，\"suddenlysqueakedalittlefishwife;\"it’sChristieJohnstone’slad;it’syondaftpainterfr’England.Hech！\"criedshe，suddenly，observingMrs.Gatty，\"it’syourson，woman.\"
Theunfortunatewomangaveafearfulscream，and，flyinglikeatigeronListon，commandedhim\"togostraightouttoseaandsaveherson.\"
JeanCarnieseizedherarm.\"Divyeseeyonboat？\"criedshe;\"anddivyemindChristie，thelasswha’shairtyehaebroken？aweel，woman——_it’sjustaracebetweendeethandCirstyJohnstoneforyourson._
Thepooroldwomanswooneddeadaway;theycarriedherintoChristieJohnstone’shouseandlaidherdown，thenhurriedback——thegreaterterrorabsorbedtheless.
LadyBarbaraSinclairwastherefromLeith;and，seeingLordIpsdenstandingintheboatwithafisherman，sheaskedhimtotellherwhatitwas;neitherhenoranyoneansweredher.
\"Whydoesn’tshecomeabout，Liston？\"criedLordIpsden，stampingwithanxietyandimpatience.
\"She’llnobelang，\"saidSandy;\"butthey’llmakamesso’’twi’ne’eramani’theboat.\"
\"Ye’resureo’thaat？\"putinawoman.
\"Ay，aboutshecomes，\"saidListon，asthesailcamedownonthefirsttack.Hewasmistaken;theydippedthelugascleverlyasanymaninthetowncould.
\"Hech！lookatherhaulingontheropelikeamon，\"criedawoman.Thesailflewupontheothertack.
\"She’sanawfu’lassie，\".whinedanother.
\"He’sawa，\"groanedListon，\"he’sdoon！\"
\"No！he’supagain，\"criedLordIpsden;\"butIfearhecan’tlivetilltheboatcomestohim.\"
Thefishermanandtheviscountheldonbyeachother.
\"Hedoesnaseeher，ormaybehe’dtakhairt.\"
\"I’dgivetenthousandpoundsifonlyhecouldseeher.MyGod，themanwillbedrownedunderoureyes.Ifhebutsawher！！！\"
ThewordshadhardlyleftLordIpsden’slips，whenthesoundofawoman’svoicecamelikeanAEoliannoteacrossthewater.
\"Hurraih！\"roaredListon，andeverycreaturejoinedthecheer.
\"She’llnolethimdee.Ah！she’sinthebows，hailinghiman’wavingthelad’sbonnetowerherheadtogiehimcoorage.Gudeblessye，lass;Gudeblessye！\"
Christieknewitwasnousehailinghimagainstthewind，butthemomentshegotthewindshedartedintothebows，andpitchedinitshighestkeyherfullandbrilliantvoice;afteramomentofsuspenseshereceivedproofthatshemustbeheardbyhim，foronthepiernowhungmenandwomen，clusteredlikebees，breathlesswithanxiety，andthemomentaftershehailedthedrowningman，shesawandheardawildyellofapplauseburstfromthepier，andthepierwasmoredistantthantheman.ShesnatchedFlucker’scap，plantedherfootonthegunwale，heldonbyarope，hailedthepoorfellowagain，andwavedthecaproundandroundherhead，togivehimcourage;andinamoment，atthesightofthis，thousandsofvoicesthunderedbacktheircheerstoheracrossthewater.
Blow，wind——spring，boat——andyou，Christie，stillringlifetowardthosedespairingearsandwavehopetothosesinkingeyes;cheertheboaton，youthousandsthatlookuponthisaction;hurrah！fromthepier;hurrah！
fromthetown;hurrah！fromtheshore;hurrah！now，fromtheveryshipsintheroads，whosecrewsareswarmingontheyardstolook;fiveminutesagotheylaughedatyou;threethousandeyesandheartshanguponyounow;ay，thesearethemomentswelivefor！
Andnowdeadsilence.Theboatiswithinfiftyyards，theyareallthreeconsultingtogetherroundthemast;anerrornowisdeath;hisforeheadonlyseemsabovewater.
\"Iftheymisshimonthattack？\"saidLordIpsden，significantly，toListon.
\"He’llneverseeLondonBriggagain，\"wasthewhisperedreply.
Theycarriedontillallonshorethoughttheywouldrunoverhim，orpasthim;butno，attenyardsdistanttheywereallatthesail，andhaditdownlikelightning;andthenFluckersprangtothebows，theotherboytothehelm.
Unfortunately，therewerebuttwoJohnstonesintheboat;andthisboy，inhishurry，actuallyputthehelmtoport，insteadoftostarboard.
Christie，whostoodamidships，sawtheerror;shesprangaft，flungtheboyfromthehelmandjammedithard—a—starboardwithherfoot.Theboatansweredthehelm，buttoolateforFlucker;themanwasfouryardsfromhimastheboatdriftedby.
\"He’sadeedmon！\"criedListon，onshore.
Theboat’slengthgaveonemorelittlechance;theafter—partmustdriftnearerhim——thankstoChristie.Fluckerflewaft;flunghimselfonhisback，andseizedhissister’spetticoats.
\"Flingyourselfowerthegunwale，\"screamedhe.\"Ye’llnohurt;I’sehaudye.\"
Sheflungherselfboldlyoverthegunwale;themanwassinking，hernailstouchedhishair，herfingersentangledthemselvesinit，shegavehimapowerfulwrenchandbroughthimalongside;theboyspinnedhimlikewild—cats.
Christiedartedawayforwardtothemast，passedaroperoundit，threwittheboys，inamomentitwasunderhisshoulders.Christiehauledonitfromtheforethwart，theboysliftedhim，andtheytumbledhim，gaspingandgurglinglikeadyingsalmon，intothebottomoftheboat，andflungnetandjacketsandsailoverhimtokeepthelifeinhim.
Ah！drawyourbreathallhandsatseaandashore，anddon’ttryitagain，younggentleman，fortherewasnothingtospare;whenyouweremissedatthebowtwostoutheartsquiveredforyou;LordIpsdenhidhisfaceinhistwohands，SandyListongaveagroan，and，whenyouweregrabbedastern，jumpedoutofhisboatandcried：
\"Agillo’whiskyforonyfavor，forit’sturnedmeasseeckasadoeg.\"
Headded：\"Hemayblessyonlassie’sfowrbanes，forshe’sta’enhimooto’Death’smaw，assureasGude’sinheaven！\"
LadyBarbara，whohadallherlifebeenlongingtoseeperilousadventures，prayedandtrembledandcriedmostpiteously;andLordIpsden’sbackwastoher，andhepaidnoattentiontohervoice;butwhenthebattlewaswon，andLordIpsdenturnedandsawher，sheclungtohisarmanddriedhertears;andthentheOldTowncheeredtheboat，andtheNewTowncheeredtheboat，andthetownscheeredeachother;andtheJohnstones，ladandlass，settheirsail，andsweptbackintriumphtothepier;sothenLadyBarbara’sbloodmountedandtingledinherveinslikefire.\"Oh，hownoble！\"criedshe.
\"Yes，dearest，\"saidIpsden.\"Youhaveseensomethinggreatdoneatlast;
andbyawoman，too！\"
\"Yes，\"saidBarbara，\"howbeautiful！oh！howbeautifulitallis;onlythenextoneIseeIshouldlikethedangertobeoverfirst，thatisall.\"
TheboysandChristie，themomenttheyhadsavedGatty，upsailagainforNewhaven;theylandedinaboutthreeminutesatthepier.
TIME.FromNewhaventowntopieronfoot：1m.30sec.Firsttack：5m.
30sec.Secondtack，andgettinghimonboard：4m.0sec.Backtothepier，goingfree：3m.30sec.
Total：14m.30sec.
Theycameintothepier，Christiesittingquietlyonthethwartafterherwork，theboysteering，andFluckerstandingagainstthemast，handsinhispockets;thedeportmentthisyounggentlemanthoughtfittoassumeonthisoccasionwas\"completeapathy\";hecameintoportwiththeairofonebringinghometheordinaryresultsofhisday’sfishing;thiswas，I
suppose，toimpressthespectatorswiththenotionthatsavingliveswasanevery—dayaffairwithLaFamilleJohnstone;asforGatty，hecametohimselfunderhisheapofnetsandjacketsandspokeoncebetweenDeath’sjawandthepier.
\"Beautiful！\"murmuredhe，andwassilent.Themeaningofthisobservationnevertranspired，andneverwillinthisworld.Sixmonthsafterward，beingsubjectedtoasearchinginterrogatory，hestatedthathehadalludedtothemajestyandfreedomofacertain_pose_Christiehadadoptedwhilehailinghimfromtheboat;but，reader，ifhehadwantedyouandmetobelieveitwasthis，heshouldnothavebeenhalfayearfindingitout——_increduliodimus！_Theylanded，andChristiesprangonshore;whileshewaswendingherwaythroughthecrowd，impededbygreetingsandacclamations，witheverynowandthenalasswavingherkerchieforaladhisbonnetovertheheroine’shead，poorMrs.GattywasreceivingtheattentionoftheNewTown;theybroughtherto，theytoldherthegoodnews——shethankedGod.
Thewholestoryhadspreadlikewildfire;theyexpostulatedwithher，theytoldhernowwasthetimetoshowshehadaheart，andblesstheyoungpeople.
Sherewardedthemwithavaluableprecept.
\"Mindyourownbusiness！\"saidshe.
\"Hech！y’areadourwife！\"criedNewhaven.
Thedourwifebenthereyesontheground.
Thepeoplewerestillcollectedatthefootofthestreet，buttheywerenowinknots，whenindashedFlucker，arrivingbyashortcut，andcrying：\"Shedoesnaken，shedoesnaken，shewasowermoedesttolook，Idaursay，andye’llnotellher，forhe’sablackguard，an’he’sjustmakingafuleo’thepuirlass，andifshekenswhatshehasdoneforhim，she’llbefondero’himthanacoowo’hercauf.\"
\"Oh，Flucker！wemauntellher，it’sherlad，herainlad，shesaved，\"
expostulatedawoman.
\"Didevermyfeytherdoagoodturntillye？\"criedFlucker.\"Awel，then，ye’llnotellthelassie，she’sweelassheis;he’sgaunt’Ennglandtheday.Icanniegieyea’ahidin’，\"saidhe，withaneyethatflashedvolumesofgoodintentiononahundredandfiftypeople;\"butIamfeytherlessandmotherless，an’Icanfa’onmykneesan’curseyea’ifyedoussicanillturn，an’thenye’llseewhetherye’llthrive.\"
\"We’llnotell，Flucker，yeneednacurseusonyway.\"
Hislordship，withallthesharpauthorityofaskipper，orderedMasterFluckertothepier，withamessagetotheyacht;Flucker_qua_yachtsmanwasamachine，andwentasamatterofcourse.\"Iamdeterminedtotellher，\"saidLordIpsdentoLadyBarbara.
\"But，\"remonstratedLadyBarbara，\"thepoorboysayshewillcurseusifwedo.\"
\"Hewon’tcurseme.\"
\"Howdoyouknowthat？\"
\"Becausethelittleblackguard’sgrogwouldbestoppedonboardtheyachtifhedid.\"
Fluckerhadnotbeengonemanyminutesbeforeloudcheeringwasheard，andChristieJohnstoneappearedconvoyedbyalargedetachmentoftheOldTown;shehadtriedtoslipaway，buttheywouldnotlether.TheyconvoyedherintriumphtilltheysawtheNewTownpeople，andthentheyturnedandlefther.
Shecameinamongthegroups，achangedwoman——herpallorandherlistlessnessweregone——theoldlightwasinhereye，andthebrightcolorinhercheek，andsheseemedhardlytotouchtheearth.
\"I’mjustdroukit，lasses，\"criedshe，gayly，wringinghersleeve.Everyeyewasuponher;didsheknow，ordidshenotknow，whatshehaddone？
LordIpsdensteppedforward;thepeopletacitlyacceptedhimasthevehicleoftheircuriosity.
\"Whowasit，Christie？\"
\"Idinnaken，formypairt！\"
Mrs.Gattycameoutofthehouse.
\"Ahandsomeyoungfellow，Ihope，Christie？\"resumedLordIpsden.
\"YemaunaskFlucker，\"wasthereply.\"Icouldnotakmucklenotice，yeken，\"puttingherhandbeforehereye，andhalfsmiling.
\"Well！Ihearheisverygood—looking;andIhearyouthinkso，too.\"
Sheglidedtohimandlookedinhisface.Hegaveameaningsmile.Thepoorgirllookedquiteperplexed.Suddenlyshegaveaviolentstart.
\"Christie！whereisChristie？\"hadcriedawell—knownvoice.Hehadlearnedonthepierwhohadsavedhim——hehadslippedupamongtheboatstofindher——hecouldnotfindhishat——hecouldnotwaitforit——hisdrippinghairshowedwherehehadbeen——itwasherlovewhomshehadjustsavedoutofDeath’sveryjaws.
Shegaveacryoflovethatwentthrougheveryheart，highorlow，youngorold，thatheardit.Andshewenttohim，throughtheairitseemed;
but，quickasshewas，anotherwasasquick;themotherhadseenhimfirst，andshewasthere.Christiesawnothing.Withanothercry，theverykeynoteofhergreatandlovingheart，sheflungherarmsround——Mrs.Gatty，whowasonthesameerrandasherself.
\"Heartsarenotsteel，andsteelisbent;Heartsarenotflint，andflintisrent.\"
TheoldwomanfeltChristietouchher.Sheturnedfromhersoninamomentandweptuponherneck.Herlovertookherhandandkissedit，andpressedittohisbosom，andtriedtospeaktoher;butallhecoulddowastosobandchoke——andkissherhandagain.
\"Mydaughter！\"sobbedtheoldwoman.
AtthatwordChristieclaspedherquickly;andthenChristiebegantocry.
\"Iamnotastone，\"criedMrs.Gatty.
\"Igavehimlife;butyouhavesavedhimfromdeath.Oh，Charles，nevermakeherrepentwhatshehasdoneforyou.\"
Shewasawoman，afterall;andprudenceandprejudicemeltedlikesnowbeforeherheart.
Therewerenotmanydryeyes——leastofalltheheroicLadyBarbara’s.
Thethreewhomamomenthadmadeonewerebecomingcalmer，andtakingoneanother’shandsforlife，whenadiabolicalsoundarose——andwhatwasitbutSandyListon，who，afterfuriousresistance，wasblubberingwithexplosivebutshort—livedviolence？Havingdoneit，hewasthefirsttodraweverybody’sattentiontothephenomenon;andaffectingtoconsideritapurelyphysicalattack，likea_coupdesoleil，_orsoon，heproceededinstantlytoDrysel’sforhispanacea.
LadyBarbaraenjoinedLordIpsdentowatchthesepeople，andnottoloseawordtheysaid;and，aftershehadinsisteduponkissingChristie，shewentofftohercarriage.Andshetoowassohappy，shecriedthreedistincttimesonherwaytoEdinburgh.
LordIpsden，havingremindedGattyofhisengagement，beggedhimtoaddhismotherandChristietotheparty，andescortedLadyBarbaratoherphaeton.
Sothenthepeopledispersedbydegrees.
\"Thatoldlady’sfaceseemsfamiliartome，\"saidLordIpsden，ashestoodonthelittlenaturalplatformbythe\"Peacock.\"\"Doyouknowwhosheis，Saunders？\"
\"ItisPeggy，thatwascookinyourlordship’suncle’stime，mylord.Shemarriedagreen—grocer，\"addedSaunders，withaninjuredair.
\"Hech！hech！\"criedFlucker，\"Christiehasta’enupherheadwi’acook’sson.\"
Mrs.Gattywasusheredintothe\"Peacock\"withmockcivilitybyMr.
Saunders.Norecognitiontookplace，eachbeingashamedoftheotherasanacquaintance.
Thenextarrivalwasabeautifulyoungladyinablacksilkgown，aplainbutduck—likeplaidshawl，whoprovedtobeChristieJohnstone，inherSundayattire.
Whentheymet，Mrs.Gattygavealittlescreamofjoy，andsaid：\"Oh，mychild;ifIhadseenyouinthatdress，Ishouldneverhavesaidawordagainstyou.\"
\"Parsminimaestipsapuellasui！\"
Hislordshipsteppeduptoher，tookoffhishat，andsaid：\"WillMrs.
Gattytakefrommeacommissionfortwopictures，asbigasherself，andasbonny？\"addedhe，doingalittleScotch.Hehandedheracheck;and，turningtoGatty，added，\"Atyourconvenience，sir，_bienentendu.\"_
\"Hech！it’sforfivehundredpund，Chairles.\"
\"Goodgeargangsinlittlebook，\"*saidJean.
*Bulk.
\"Ay，doesit，\"repliedFlucker，assumingthecompliment.
\"Mylord！\"saidtheartist，\"youtreatArtlikeaprince;andsheshalltreatyoulikeaqueen.Whenthesuncomesoutagain，Iwillworkforyouandfame.Youshallhavetwothingspainted，everystrokeloyallyinthesunlight.InspiteofgloomywinterandgloomierLondon，IwilltryifI
can’thangnatureandsummeronyourwallsforever.Asforme，youknowI
mustgotoGerardDowandCuyp，andPierredeHoogh，whenmylittlesandisrun;butmyhandwritingshallwarmyourchildren’schildren’shearts，sir，whenthishandisdust.\"Hiseyeturnedinward，hewalkedtoandfro，andhiscompanionsdiedoutofhissight——hewasinthekingdomofart.
HislordshipandJeanenteredthe\"Peacock，\"followedbyFlucker，whomerelylingeredatthedoortomoralizeasfollows：
\"Hech！hech！isnathaatlamentable？Christie’smon’sasdaftasadrunkweaver.\"
Butonestayedquietlybehind，andassumedthatmomenttheofficeofherlife.
\"Ay！\"heburstoutagain，\"theresourcesofourartarestillunfathomed！
Picturesareyettobepaintedthatshallrefreshmen’sinnersouls，andhelptheirheartsagainsttheartificialworld;andcharmthefiendaway，likeDavid’sharp！！Theworld，aftercenturiesoflies，willgivenatureandtruthatrial.Whataparadiseartwillbe，whentruths，insteadoflies，shallbetoldonpaper，onmarble，oncanvas，andontheboards！！！\"
\"Dinner’sontheboarrd，\"murmuredChristie，alludingtoLordIpsden’sbreakfast;\"andIhaethechargeo’ye，\"pullinghissleevehardenoughtodestroytheequilibriumofaflea.
\"Thendon’tletuswasteourtimehere.Oh，Christie！\"
\"Whatest，myladdy？\"
\"I’msopreciouslyhungry！！！！\"
\"C—way*then！\"
*Comeaway.
Offtheyran，handinhand，sparksofbeauty，loveandhappinessflyingallaboutthem.
CHAPTERXVII.
\"THEREisnothingbutmeetingandpartinginthisworld！\"andyoumaybesuretheincongruouspersonagesofourtalecouldnotlongbetogether.
Theirseparatepathshadmetforaninstantinonefocus，furnishedthenandtherethematterofaneccentricstory，andthendivergedforever.
Ourliveshaveageneralcurrent，andalsoanepisodeortwo;andtheepisodesofacommonplacelifeareoftenratherstartling;inlikemannerthistaleisnotaspecimen，butanepisodeofLordIpsdenandLadyBarbara，whosoonafterthismarriedandlivedliketherestofthe_beaumonde._Insodoing，theypassedoutofmyhands;suchaswishtoknowhowviscountsandviscountessesfeedandsleep，anddothedomestic（socalled），andthesocial（socalled），arereferredtothefashionablenovel.ToMr.Saunders，forinstance，whohasinthepressoneofthosecerberus—leviathansoffiction，socommonnow;incredibleasfoliotofutureages.Saunderswilltakeyoubythehand，andleadyouovercarpetstwoinchesthick——underrosycurtains——todinner—tables.Hewill_fete_you，andoperayou，anddazzleyouryoungimaginationwith_e’p’ergnes，_andsalvers，andbuhlandormolu.Nofishwivesorpaintersshallintrudeuponhispolishedscenes;allshallbeasgenteelashimself.Saundersisagoodauthority;heismoreinthesociety，andfarmoreintheconfidenceofthegreat，thanmostfashionablenovelists.Mr.
Saunders’sworkwillbeinthreevolumes;ninehundredandninetypages！！！！！！
Inotherwords，thissingleworkofthisingeniouswriterwillequalinbulktheaggregateofallthewritingsextantbyMoses，David，Solomon，Isaiah，andSt.Paul！！！
Ishallnotventureintocompetitionwiththisbehemothofthe_salon;_I
willevaporateinthingeneralities.
LordIpsdenthenlivedveryhappilywithLadyBarbara，whoseherohestraightwaybecame，andwhonoblyandpoeticallydotesuponhim.Hehasgoneintopoliticallifetopleaseher，andwillremainthere——topleasehimself.TheywerebothverygratefultoNewhaven;whentheymarriedtheyvowedtovisitittwiceayear，andmingleafortnight’ssimplelifewithitssimplescenes;butfouryearshavepassed，andtheyhaveneverbeenthereagain，andIdaresayneverwill;butwhenViscountIpsdenfallsinwithabrotheraristocratwhoiscrushedbythefiend_ennui，_heremembersAberford，andcondenseshisfamousrecipeintoatwo—edgedhexameter，whichwillmakemylearnedreaderlaugh，foritisfullofwisdom：
\"Diluculosurgas！miserissuccurrerediscas！！\"
FluckerJohnstonemeditatedduringbreakfastuponthefivehundredpounds，andregrettedhehadnotyearsagoadoptedMr.Gatty’sprofession;somedaysafterwardheinvitedhissistertoaconference.
Chairsbeingset，Mr.Fluckerlaiddownthisobservation，thatnearrelationsshouldbedeucedcarefulnottocastdiscreditupononeanother;thatnowhissisterwastobealady，itwasrepugnanttohissenseofrighttobeafishermanandmakeherladyshipblushforhim;onthecontrary，hefeltithisdutytorisetosuchhighconsiderationthatsheshouldbeproudofhim.
Christieacquiescedatonceinthisposition，butprofessedherselfembarrassedtoknowhowsucha\"ne’er—do—weel\"wastobemadeasourceofpride;thenshekissedFlucker，andsaid，inatonesomewhatinconsistentwiththeabove，\"Tellme，mylaamb！\"
Herlambinformedherthattheseahasmanypaths;someofthemdisgraceful，suchaslineornetfishing，andtheperiodicallayingdown，onrockyshoals，andtakingupagain，oflobster—creels;others，superiortoanythingthedrylandcanofferinimportanceanddignityandgeneralestimation，suchasthecommandofamerchantvesseltradingtotheEastorWestIndies.Herlambthensuggestedthatifshewouldbesogoodastolaunchhiminthemerchant—service，withagoodrigofclothesandmoneyinhispocket，therewasthatinhisheadwhichwouldenablehimtoworktowindwardofmostofhiscontemporaries.Hebadehercalculateuponthefollowingresults：Inayearortwohewouldbesecondmate，andnextyearfirstmate，andinafewyearsmoreskipper！Thinkofthat，lass！Skipperofavessel，whoserighegenerouslylefthissisterfreetodetermine;premisingthattwomastswere，inhistheoryofnavigation，indispensable，andthatthreewereagreatdealmorelikeCockerthantwo.Thisledtoageneralconsultation;Flucker’sambitionwasdiscussedandpraised.Thatmodestyounggentleman，inspiteofmanyinjunctionstothecontrary，communicatedhissister’splansforhimtoLordIpsden，andaffectedtodoubttheirprudence.Thebaittook;LordIpsdenwrotetohismanofbusiness，andanunexpectedblowfellupontheingeniousFlucker.
Hewassenttoschool;theretolearnalittleastronomy，alittlenavigation，alittleseamanship，alittlemanners，etc.;inthemysteriesofreadingandwritinghissisterhadalreadyperfectedhimbydintof\"thetaws.\"Thisschoolwasablow;butFluckerwasnofool;hesawtherewasnowayofgettingfromschooltoseawithoutworking.Soheliterallyworkedouttosea.Hisfirstvoyagewasdistinguishedbythefollowingpeculiarities：Attemptstoputtricksuponthisparticularnovicegenerallyendedinthelaughturningagainsttheexperimenters;andinsteadofdrinkinghisgrog，whichhehates，hesecretedit，andsolditforvariousadvantages.Hehasbeennowfourvoyages.Whenhecomesashore，insteadofgoingtohauntsoffollyandvice，heinstantlybearsupforhissister’shouse——KensingtonGravel—pits——whichhemakesinthefollowingmanner：Hegoesuptheriver——Heavenknowswhereall——thishecallsrunningdownthelongitude;thenhelands，andbearsdownupontheGravel—pits;inparticularknowledgeofthenamesofstreetsheisdeficient，butheknowstheexactbearingsofChristie’sdwelling.Hetacksandwearsaccordingasmasonrycompelshim，andhearrivesatthegate.Hehailsthehouse，inavoicethatbringsalltheinhabitantsoftherowtotheirwindows，includingChristie;heisfallenuponanddraggedintothehouse.Thefirstthingis，hedrawsoutfromhisboots，andhisback，andotherhiding—places，ChinacrapeandmarveloussilkhandkerchiefsforChristie;andshetakesfromhispocketamassofOrientalsugar—plums，withwhich，butforthisprecaution，sheknowsbyexperiencehewouldpoisonyoungCharley;andsoonheistobeseensittingwithhishandinhissister’s，andshelooknglikeamotheruponhishandsome，weather—beatenface，andGattyopposite，adoringhimasaspecimenofmalebeauty，andsometimesmakingfurtivesketchesofhim.
Andthenthetaleshealwaysbringswithhim;thehouseisneververydull，butitislivelierthaneverwhenthisinexhaustiblesailorcastsanchorinit.
Thefriends（chieflyartists）whousedtoleaveat9：30，staytilleleven;foranintelligentsailorisbettercompanythantwolawyers，twobishops，threesoldiers，andfourwritersofplaysandtales，allrolledtogether.AndstillhetellsChristieheshallcommandavesselsomeday，andleadshertothemostcheeringinferencesfromthefactofhisprudenceandhisgeneralwidth—awake;inparticularhebidshercontrastwithhimthegeneralfateofsailors，eatenupbyland—sharks，particularlyofthefemalegender，whomhedemonstratestobetheworstenemiespoorJackhas;hecallsthesesunkenrocks，fire—shipsandothermetaphors.Heconcludesthus：\"YouareallthelassImeantohavetillI’maskipper，andthenI’llbearupalongsidesomepretty，decentlass，likeyourself，Christie，andwe’llsailincompanyallourlives，letthewindblowhighorlow.\"SuchisthegraciousFluckerbecomeinhistwentiethyear.Lastvoyage，withChristie’said，heproducedasextantofhisown，and\"madeittwelveo’clock\"（withthesun’sconsent，I
hope），andtheeyesofauthorityfelluponhim.So，whoknows？perhapshemayoneday，sailaship;and，ifhedoes，hewillbeprouderandhappierthanifwemadehimmonarchoftheglobe.
Toreturntoourchiefs;Mrs.Gattygaveherformalconsenttoherson’smarriagewithChristieJohnstone.
Therewereexamples.Aristocracyhaderenowcondescendedtowealth;
earlshadmarriedwomenrichbytallow—importingpapas;andnodoubt，hadthesesameearlsbeenconsultedinGatty’scase，theywouldhavedecidedthatChristieJohnstone，withherrealandfundedproperty，wasnotavillainousmatchforagreengrocer’sson，withoutarapp;*butMrs.
Gattydidnotreasonso，didnotreasonatall，luckily，herheartranawaywithherjudgment，and，herjudgmentceasingtoact，shebecameawisewoman.
*AdiminutiveGermancoin.
Thecasewaspeculiar.Gattywasaartist_pursang_——andChristie，whowouldnothavebeenthewifefora_petitmaitre，_wasthewifeofwivesforhim.
Hewantedabeautifulwifetoembellishhiscanvas，disfiguredhithertobyaninjudiciousselectionofmodels;avirtuouswifetobehiscrown;aprudentwifetosavehimfromruin;acheerfulwifetosustainhisspirits，droopingattimesbyvirtueofhisartist’stemperament;anintellectualwifetopreservehischildrenfrombeingborndoltsandbreddunces，andtokeephisownmindfromsharpeningtoonepoint，andsocontractingandbecomingmonomaniacal.Andhefoundallthesequalities，togetherwiththesunandmoonofhumanexistence——trueloveandtruereligion——inChristieJohnstone.
Insimilarcases，foolishmenhavesettoworktomake，insixmonths，theirdiamondofnature，theexactcutandglossofothermen’spastes，and，nervouslywatchingtheprocess，havesufferedtorture;luckilyCharlesGattywasnotwiseenoughforthis;hesawnaturehaddistinguishedherhelovedbeyondherfellows;here，aselsewhere，hehadfaithinnature——hebelievedthatChristiewouldcharmeverybodyofeye，andear，andmind，andheart，thatapproachedher;headmiredherasshewas，andlefthertopolishherself，ifshechose.Hedidwell;shecametoLondonwithafinemind，abroadbrogue，adelicateear;sheobservedhowherhusband’sfriendsspoke，andinaveryfewmonthsshehadtoneddownherScotchtoarichIoniccoloring，whichherwomanlyinstinctwillneverletherexchangeforthethin，vinegaraccentsthataretooprevalentinEnglishandFrenchsociety;andinotherrespectsshecaught，byeasygradation，thetoneofthenewsocietytowhichhermarriageintroducedher，without，however，losinghercharmingself.
Thewisedowagerlodgeshardby，havingresistedaninvitationtobeinthesamehouse;shecomestothathousetoassisttheyoungwifewithherexperience，andtobewelcome——nottointerfereeveryminute，andteaseher;shelovesherdaughter—in—lawalmostasmuchasshedoesherson，andsheishappybecausehebidsfairtobeanimmortalpainter，and，aboveall，agentleman;andshe，awifelywife，amotherlymother，and，aboveall，alady.
This，then，isahappycouple.Theirlifeisfullofpurposeandindustry，yetlightenedbygayety;theygotooperas，theatersandballs，fortheyareyoung.Theyhaveplentyofsociety，realsociety，nottheill—assortedcollectionofapredeterminednumberofbodies，thatblindlyassumesthatname，buttherichcommunicationofvariousandfertileminds;theyvery，veryseldomconsenttosquatfourmortalhoursononechair（likeoldharesstiffeningintheirhotforms），andnibbling，sippingandtwaddlinginfourmortalhourswhatcouldhavebeeneaten，drunkenandsaidinthirty—fiveminutes.Theyarebothartistsatheart，anditshockstheirnaturestoseefolksmixsoverylargelythe_inutile_withthe_insipidum，_andwaste，atonehugebutbarrenincubation，thesoul，andthestomach，andtheirrevocablehours，thingswithwhichsomuchistobedone.Buttheyhavemanydesirableacquaintances，andnotafewfriends;thelatteraremostlyloversoftruthintheirseveraldepartments，andinallthings.Amongthemarepainters，sculptors，engineers，writers，conversers，thinkers;theseacknowledging，eveninEngland，othergodsbesidestheintestines，meetoften_chez_Gatty，chieflyformentalintercourse;acupofteawithsuchisfound，byexperience，tobebetterthanastalledelkwherechit—chatreignsovertheprostratehours.
This，then，isahappycouple;theverypigeonsandthecrowsneednotblushforthenestatKensingtonGravel—pits.TherethedivineinstitutionMarriagetakesitsnaturalcolors，anditisatoncepleasantandgoodtocatchsuchglimpsesofHeaven’sdesign，andsadtothinkhowoftenthisgreatboon，accordedbyGodtomanandwoman，musthavebeenabusedandperverted，ereitcouldhavesunktobethestandingbuttoffarce—writers，andthethemeofweeklypunsters.
Inthispairweseethewondersamaleandfemalecandoforeachotherinthesweetbondofholywedlock.Inthatblessedrelationalonetwointerestsarereallyone，andtwoheartsliesafeatanchorsidebyside.
ChristieandCharlesarefriends——fortheyaremanandwife.
ChristieandCharlesareloversstill——fortheyaremanandwife.
ChristieandCharlesareoneforever——fortheyaremanandwife.
Thiswifebrightensthehouse，fromkitchentogarret，forherhusband;
thishusbandworkslikeakingforhiswife’scomfort，andforhisownfame——andthatfameishiswife’sglory.Whenoneoftheseexpressesorhintsawish，theother’sfirstimpulseistofindthemeans，nottheobjections.
Theysharealltroubles，and，bysharing，halvethem.
Theyshareallpleasures，and，bysharing，doublethem.
Theyclimbthehilltogethernow，andmanyacantydaytheyshallhavewithoneanother;andwhen，bytheinevitablelaw，theybegintodescendtowardthedarkvalley，theywillstillgohandinhand，smilingsotenderly，andsupportingeachotherwithacaremorelovelythanwhenthearmwasstrongandthefootfirm.
Onthesetwotemperatelivesoldagewilldescendlightly，gradually，gently，andlate——andlateupontheseevergreenhearts，becausetheyarenottunedtosomeselfish，isolatedkey;theseheartsbeatandringwiththeyoungheartsoftheirdearchildren，andyearshencepapaandmammawillbeginlifehopefully，wishfully，warmlyagainwitheachlovednoviceinturn.
Andwhenoldagedoescome，itwillbenocalamitytothese，asitistoyou，poorbatteredbeau，laughedatbythefairninnieswhoerstlaughedwithyou;toyou，poorfollowerofsalmon，fox，andpheasant，whosejointsarestiffening，whosenerveisgone——whoseGolgotharemains;toyou，poorfadedbeauty，whohavestakedalluponman’sappetite，andnotaccumulatedgoodnessorsenseforyoursecondcourse;toyou，poordrawing—roomwit，whosesarcasmhasturnedtovenomandisturningtodrivel.
Whatterrorshasoldageforthishappypair？itcannotmakethemugly，for，thoughthepurplelightofyouthrecedes，anewkindoftranquilbeauty，thealoe—blossomofmanyyearsofinnocence，comesto，andsitslikeadoveupon，theagedfaces，wheregoodness，sympathyandintelligencehaveharboredtogethersolong;andwhereevilpassionshaveflitted（forweareallhuman），butfoundnoresting—place.
Oldageisnocalamitytothem.Itcannotterrifythem;foreretheyhadbeenmarriedaweekthewomantaughttheman，loveroftruth，tosearchforthehighestandgreatesttruthsinabookwrittenformen’ssoulsbytheAuthoroftheworld，thesea，thestars，thesun，thesoul;andthisbook，_Deigratia，_will，asthegoodbishopsings，\"TeachthemtolivethattheymaydreadThegraveaslittleastheirbed.\"
Itcannotmakethemsad，for，ereitcomeslovedsoulswillhavegonefromearthandfromtheirtenderbosom，butnotfromtheirmemories;andwillseemtobeckonthemnowacrossthecoldvalleytothegoldenland.
Itcannotmakethemsad，foronearththehappiestmustdrinkasorrowfulcupmorethanonceinalonglife，andsotheirbrightesthopeswillhavecometodwellhabituallyonthingsbeyondthegrave;andthegreatpainter，_jamSenex，_willchieflymeditateuponaricherlandscapeandbrighterfiguresthanhumanhandhaseverpainted;ascenewhoseglorieshecanseefromhencebutbyglimpsesandthroughaglassdarkly;thegreatmeadowsontheothersideofJordan，whicharebrightwiththespiritsofthejustthatwalkthere，andarewarmedwithaneternalsun，andringwiththetriumphofthehumbleandthetrue，andthepraisesofGodforever.
