第3章

\"Iamtall，withablackbeard，andIhatepublicity。Ihavenomoneytospeakof；Idonotlikeoatmeal，anditistheoneambitionofmylifetodierich。Iamofacoldandheartlessdisposition。IdonotcareformyfellowmenandInevergiveacenttobeggarsorcharity。 \"Now，mydeardoctor，thatisthetruedescriptionofmyself，themanwhomthatshrewddetectivewastohuntdown。YouwhoarefamiliarwiththehistoryofcrimeinNewYorkoflateshouldbeabletoforetelltheresult。WhenIpromisedyoutoexhibittoyourincredulousgazethesleuthwhowassetuponme，youlaughedatmebecauseyousaidthatdetectivesandmurderersnevermetinNewYork。 Ihavedemonstratedtoyouthatthetheoryispossible。\" \"Buthowdidyoudoit？\"Iaskedagain。 \"Itwasverysimple，\"repliedthedistinguishedmurderer。\"I assumedthatthedetectivewouldgoexactlyoppositetotheclueshehad。Ihavegivenyouadescriptionofmyself。Therefore，hemustnecessarilysettoworkandtrailashortmanwithawhitebeardwholikestobeinthepapers，whoisverywealthy，isfond’ofoatmeal，wantstodiepoor，andisofanextremelygenerousandphilanthropicdisposition。Whenthusfarisreachedthemindhesitatesnolonger。IconveyedyouatoncetothespotwhereShamrockJolneswaspipingoffAndrewCarnegie’sresidence。\" \"Knight，\"saidI，\"you’reawonder。Iftherewasnodangerofyourreforming，whataroundsmanyou’dmakefortheNineteenthPrecinct!\" THEDOGANDTHEPLAYLET [Thisstoryhasbeenrewrittenandpublishedin\"StrictlyBusiness\" underthetitle，TheProofofthePudding。] UsuallyitisacolddayinJulywhenyoucanstrollupBroadwayinthatmonthandgetastoryoutofthedrama。Ifoundoneafewbreathless，parboilingdaysago，anditseemstodecideaseriousquestioninart。 TherewasnotasoulleftinthecityexceptHollisandme——andtwoorthreemillionsunworshipperswhoremainedatdesksandcounters。 Theelecthadfledtoseashore，lake，andmountain，andhadalreadybeguntodrawforadditionalfunds。EveryeveningHollisandI prowledaboutthedesertedtownsearchingforcoolnessinemptycafes，dining—rooms，androofgardens。WeknewtothetenthpartofarevolutionthespeedofeveryelectricfaninGotham，andwefollowedtheswiftestastheyvaried。Hollis’sfiancee。MissLorisSherman，hadbeenintheAdirondacks，atLowerSaranacLake，foramonth。Inanotherweekhewouldjoinherpartythere。Inthemeantime，hecursedthecitycheerfullyandoptimistically，andsoughtmysocietybecauseIsufferedhimtoshowmeherphotographduringtheblackcoffeeeverytimewedinedtogether。 Myrevengewastoreadtohimmyone—actplay。 Itwasoneinsufferableeveningwhentheoverplusoftheday’sheatwasbeinghurledquiveringlybacktotheheavensbyeverysurchargedbrickandstoneandinchofironinthepantingtown。Butwiththecunningofthetwo—leggedbeastswehadfoundanoasiswherethehoofsofApollo’ssteedhadnotbeenallowedtostrike。Ourseatswereonanoceanofcool，polishedoak；thewhitelinenoffiftydesertedtablesflappedlikeseagullsintheartificialbreeze；amileawayawaiterlingeredforaheliographicsignal——wemighthaveroaredsongsthereorfoughtaduelwithoutmolestation。 OutcameMissLoris’sphotowiththecoffee，andIoncemorepraisedtheelegantpoiseoftheneck，theextremelylow—coiledmassofheavyhair，andtheeyesthatfollowedone，likethoseinanoilpainting。 \"She’sthegreatestever，\"saidHollis，withenthusiasm。\"GoodasGreatNorthernPreferred，andadispositionbuiltlikeawatch。OneweekmoreandI’llbehappyJonny—on—the—spot。OldTomTolliver，mybestcollegechum，wentuptheretwoweeksago。HewritesmethatLorisdoesn’ttalkaboutanythingbutme。Oh，IguessRipVanWinkledidn’thaveallthegoodluck!\" \"Yes，yes，\"saidI，hurriedly，pullingoutmytypewrittenplay。 \"She’snodoubtacharminggirl。Now，here’sthatlittlecurtain— raiseryoupromisedtolistento。\" \"Everbeentriedonthestage？\"askedHollis。 \"Notexactly，\"Ianswered。\"IreadhalfofittheotherdaytoafellowwhosebrotherknowsRobertEdeson；buthehadtocatchatrainbeforeIfinished。\" \"Goon，\"saidHollis，slidingbackinhischairlikeagoodfellow。 \"I’mnostagecarpenter，butI’lltellyouwhatIthinkofitfromafirst—rowbalconystandpoint。I’matheatrebugduringtheseason，andIcansizeupafakeplayalmostasquickasthegallerycan。 Flagthewaiteroncemore，andthengoaheadashardasyoulikewithit。I’llbethedog。\" Ireadmylittleplaylovingly，and，Ifear，notwithoutsomeelocution。TherewasonesceneinitthatIbelievedingreatly。 Thecomedyswiftlyrisesintothrillingandunexpectedlydevelopeddrama。Capt。Marchmontsuddenlybecomescognizantthathiswifeisanunscrupulousadventuress，whohasdeceivedhimfromthedayoftheirfirstmeeting。Therapidandmortalduelbetweenthemfromthatmoment——shewithhermagnificentliesandsirencharm，windingabouthimlikeaserpent，tryingtorecoverherlostground；hewithhisman’sagonyandscornandlostfaith，tryingtotearherfromhisheart。ThatsceneIalwaysthoughtwasacrackerjack。WhenCapt。 MarchmontdiscoversherduplicitybyreadingonablotterinamirrortheimpressionofanotethatshehaswrittentotheCount，heraiseshishandtoheavenandexclaims：\"OGod，whocreatedwomanwhileAdamslept，andgavehertohimforacompanion，takebackThygiftandreturninsteadthesleep，thoughitlastforever!\" \"Rot，\"saidHollis，rudely，whenIhadgiventhoselineswithproperemphasis。 \"Ibegyourpardon!\"Isaid，assweetlyasIcould。 \"Comenow，\"wentonHollis，\"don’tbeanidiot。Youknowverywellthatnobodyspoutsanystufflikethatthesedays。Thatsketchwentalongallrightuntilyourangintheskyrockets。Cutoutthatright—armexerciseandtheAdamandEvestunt，andmakeyourcaptaintalkasyouorIorBillJoneswould。\" \"I’lladmit，\"saidI，earnestly（formytheorywasbeingtouchedupon），\"thatonallordinaryoccasionsallofususecommonplacelanguagetoconveyourthoughts。Youwillrememberthatuptothemomentwhenthecaptainmakeshisterriblediscoveryallthecharactersonthestagetalkprettymuchastheywould，inreallife。 ButIbelievethatIamrightinallowinghimlinessuitabletothestrongandtragicsituationintowhichhefalls。\" \"Tragic，myeye!\"saidmyfriend，irreverently。\"InShakespeare’sdayhemighthavesputteredoutsomehigh—cockalorumnonsenseofthatsort，becauseinthosedaystheyorderedhamandeggsinblankverseanddischargedthecookwithanepic。ButnotforB’wayinthesummerof1905!\" \"Itismyopinion，\"saidI，\"thatgreathumanemotionsshakeupourvocabularyandleavethewordsbestsuitedtoexpressthemontop。A suddenviolentgrieforlossordisappointmentwillbringexpressionsoutofanordinarymanasstrongandsolemnanddramaticasthoseusedinfictionoronthestagetoportraythoseemotions。\" \"That’swhereyoufellowsarewrong，\"saidHollis。\"Plain，every—daytalkiswhatgoes。Yourcaptainwouldverylikelyhavekickedthecat，litacigar，stirredupahighball，andtelephonedforalawyer，insteadofgettingoffthoseRobertMantellpyrotechnics。\" \"Possibly，alittlelater，\"Icontinued。\"Butjustatthetime——justastheblowisdelivered，ifsomethingScripturalortheatricalanddeep—tonguedisn’twrungfromamaninspiteofhismodernandpracticalwayofspeaking，thenI’mwrong。\" \"Ofcourse，\"saidHollis，kindly，\"you’vegottowhoopherupsomedegreesforthestage。Theaudienceexpectsit。WhenthevillainkidnapslittleEffieyouhavetomakehermotherclawsomechunksoutoftheatmosphere，andscream：\"Mechee—ild，mechee—ild!\"Whatshewouldactuallydowouldbetocallupthepoliceby’phone，ringforsomestrongtea，andgetthelittledarling’sphotoout，readyforthereporters。Whenyougetyourvillaininacorner——astagecorner——it’sallrightforhimtoclaphishandtohisforeheadandhiss： \"Allislost!\"Offthestagehewouldremark：\"Thisisaconspiracyagainstme——Ireferyoutomylawyers。’\" \"Igetnoconsolation，\"saidI，gloomily，\"fromyourconcessionofanaccentuatedstagetreatment。InmyplayIfondlyhopedthatIwasfollowinglife。Ifpeopleinreallifemeetgreatcrisesinacommonplaceway，theyshoulddothesameonthestage。\" Andthenwedrifted，liketwotrout，outofourcoolpoolinthegreathotelandbegantonibblelanguidlyatthegayfliesintheswiftcurrentofBroadway。Andourquestionofdramaticartwasunsettled。 Wenibbledattheflies，andavoidedthehooks，aswisetroutdo；butsoonthewearinessofManhattaninsummerovercameus。Ninestoriesup，facingthesouth，wasHollis’sapartment，andwesoonsteppedintoanelevatorboundforthatcoolerhaven。 Iwasfamiliarinthosequarters，andquicklymyplaywasforgotten，andIstoodatasideboardmixingthings，withcrackediceandglassesallaboutme。Abreezefromthebaycameinthewindowsnotaltogetherblightedbytheasphaltfurnaceoverwhichithadpassed。 Hollis，whistlingsoftly，turnedoveralate—arrivedletterortwoonhistable，anddrewaroundthecoolestwickerarmchairs。 IwasjustmeasuringtheVermouthcarefullywhenIheardasound。 Someman’svoicegroanedhoarsely：\"False，oh，God!——false，andLoveisalieandfriendshipbutthebywordofdevils!\" Ilookedaroundquickly。Hollislayacrossthetablewithhisheaddownuponhisoutstretchedarms。Andthenhelookedupatmeandlaughedinhisordinarymanner。 Iknewhim——hewaspokingfunatmeaboutmytheory。Anditdidseemsounnatural，thoseswellingwordsduringourquietgossip，thatI halfbegantobelieveIhadbeenmistaken——thatmytheorywaswrong。 Hollisraisedhimselfslowlyfromthetable。 \"Youwererightaboutthattheatricalbusiness，oldman，\"hesaid，quietly，ashetossedanotetome。 Ireadit。 LorishadrunawaywithTomTolliver。 ALITTLETALKABOUTMOBS \"Isee，\"remarkedthetallgentlemaninthefrockcoatandblackslouchhat，\"thatanotherstreetcarmotormaninyourcityhasnarrowlyexcapedlynchingatthehandsofaninfuriatedmobbylightingacigarandwalkingacoupleofblocksdownthestreet。\" \"Doyouthinktheywouldhavelynchedhim？\"askedtheNewYorker，inthenextseatoftheferrystation，whowasalsowaitingfortheboat。 \"Notuntilaftertheelection，\"saidthetallman，cuttingacorneroffhisplugoftobacco。\"I’vebeeninyourcitylongenoughtoknowsomethingaboutyourmobs。Themotorman’smobisabouttheleastdangerousofthemall，excepttheNationalGuardandtheDressmakers’ Convention。 \"Yousee，whenlittleWillieGoldsteinissentbyhismotherforpigs’ knuckles，withanickeltightlygraspedinhischubbyfist，healwayscrossesthestreetcartracksafelytwentyfeetaheadofthecar；andthensuddenlyturnsbacktoaskhisinotherwhetheritwaspalealeoraspoolof80whitecottonthatshewanted。Themotormanyellsandthrowshimselfonthebrakeslikeafootballplayer。Thereisahorriblegrindingandthenarippingsound，andapiercingshriek，andWillieissitting，withpartofhistrouserstornawaybythefender，screamingforhislostnickel。 \"Intensecondsthecarissurroundedby600infuriatedcitizens，crying，’Lynchthemotorman!Lynchthemotorman!’atthetopoftheirvoices。Someofthemruntothenearestcigarstoretogetarope；buttheyfindthelastonehasjustbeencutupandlabelled。 Hundredsoftheexcitedmobpressclosetothecoweringmotorman，whosehandisobservedtotrembleperceptiblyashetransfersastickofpepsingumfromhispockettohismouth。 \"Whenthebloodthirstymobofmaddenedcitizenshasclosedinonthemotorman，somebringingcampstoolsandsittingquiteclosetohim，andallshouting，’Lynchhim!’PolicemanFogartyforceshiswaythroughthemtothesideoftheirprospectivevictim。 \"’Hello，Mike，’saysthemotormaninalowvoice，’niceday。ShallIsneakoffablockorso，orwouldyouliketorescueme？’ \"’Well，Jerry，ifyoudon’tmind，’saysthepoliceman，’I’dliketodispersetheinfuriatedmobsinglehanded。Ihaven’tdefeatedalynchingmobsincelastTuesday；andthatwasasmalloneofonly300，thatwantedtostringupaDagoboyforsellingwormypears。 Itwouldboostmesomedownatthestation。’ \"’Allright，Mike，’saysthemotorman，’anythingtooblige。I’llturnpaleandtremble。’ \"Andhedoesso；andPolicemanFogartydrawshisclubandsays，’G’wanwidyez!’andineightsecondsthedesperatemobhasscatteredandgoneaboutitsbusiness，exceptaboutahundredwhoremaintosearchforWillie’snickel。\" \"Ineverheardofamobinourcitydoingviolencetoamotormanbecauseofanaccident，\"saidtheNewYorker。 \"Youarenotliableto，\"saidthetallman。\"Theyknowthemotorman’sallright，andthathewouldn’tevenrunoverastraydogifhecouldhelpit。Andtheyknowthatnotamanamong’emwouldtietheknottohangevenaThomascatthathadbeentriedandcondemnedandsentencedaccordingtolaw。\" \"Thenwhydotheybecomeinfuriatedandmakethreatsoflynching？\" askedtheNewYorker。 \"Toassurethemotorman，\"answeredthetallman，\"thatheissafe。 Iftheyreallywantedtodohimuptheywouldgointothehousesanddropbricksonhimfromthethird—storywindows。\" \"NewYorkersarenotcowards，\"saidtheotherman，alittlestiffly。 \"Notoneatatime，\"agreedthetallman，promptly。\"You’vegotafinelotofsingle—handedscrappersinyourtown。I’dratherfightthreeofyouthanone；andI’dgoupagainstalltheGasTrust’svictimsinabunchbeforeI’dpasstwocitizensonadarkcorner，withmywatchchainshowing。Whenyougetroundedupinabunchyouloseyournerve。Getyouincrowdsandyou’reeasy。Askthe’L’ roadguardsandGeorgeB。CortelyouandthetintypeboothsatConeyIsland。Dividedyoustand，unitedyoufall。~Epluribusnihil。~ Wheneveroneofyourmobssurroundsamanandbeginstoholler，\"Lynchhim!’hesaystohimself，\"Oh，dear，IsupposeImustlookpaletopleasetheboys，butIwill，forsooth，letmylifeinsurancepremiumlapseto—morrow。ThisisasuretipformetoplayMethuselahstraightacrosstheboardinthenexthandicap。’ \"IcanimaginethetorturedfeelingsofaprisonerinthehandsofNewYorkpolicemenwhenaninfuriatedmobdemandsthathebeturnedovertothemforlynching。\"ForGod’ssake，officers，’criesthedistractedwretch，’haveyeheartsofstone，thatyewillnotletthemwrestmefromye？’ \"’Sorry，Jimmy，’saysoneofthepolicemen，’butitwon’tdo。There’sthreeofus——meandDarrelandtheplain—clothesman；andthere’sonlysivinthousandofthemob。How’dweexplainitattheofficeiftheytookye？Jistchasetheinfuriatedaggregationaroundthecorner，Darrel，andwe’llbemovin’alongtothestation。’\" \"Someofourgatheringsofexcitedcitizenshavenotbeensoharmless，\"saidtheNewYorker，withafaintnoteofcivicpride。 \"I’lladmitthat，\"saidthetallman。\"Acousinofminewhowasonavisithereoncehadanarmbrokenandlostanearinoneofthem。\" \"ThatmusthavebeenduringtheCooperUnionriots，\"remarkedtheNewYorker。 \"NottheCooperUnion，\"explainedthetallman——\"butitwasaunionriot——attheVanastorwedding。\" \"Youseemtobeinfavoroflynchlaw，\"saidtheNewYorker，severely。 \"No，sir，Iamnot。Nointelligentmanis。But，sir，therearecertaincaseswhenpeopleriseintheirjustmajestyandtakearighteousvengeanceforcrimesthatthelawisslowinpunishing。 Iamanadvocateoflawandorder，butIwillsaytoyouthatlessthansixmonthsagoImyselfassistedatthelynchingofone\"ofthatracethatiscreatingawidechasmbetweenyoursectionofcountryandmine，sir。\" \"Itisadeplorablecondition，\"saidtheNewYorker，\"thatexistsintheSouth，but——\" \"IamfromIndiana，sir，\"saidthetallman，takinganotherchew； \"andIdon’tthinkyouwillcondemnmycoursewhenItellyouthatthecoloredmaninquestionhadstolen$9。60incash，sir，frommyownbrother。\" THESNOWMAN EDITORIALNOTE。——~BeforethefatalillnessofWilliamSydneyPorter（knownthroughhisliteraryworkas\"O。Henry\"）thisAmericanmasterofshort—storywritinghadbegunforHampton’sMagazinethestoryprintedbelow。Illnesscreptuponhimrapidlyandhewascompelledtogiveupwritingaboutatthepointwherethegirlentersthestory。 Whenherealizedthathecoulddonomore{itwashislifelonghabittowritewithapencil，neverdictatingtoastenographer），O。HenrytoldindetailtheremainderofTheSnowMantoHarrisMertonLyon，whomhehadoftenspokenofasoneofthemosteffectiveshort—storywritersofthepresenttime。Mr。Porterhaddelineatedallofthecharacters，leavingonlytheroundingoutoftheplotinthefinalpagestoMr。Lyon。~ Housedandwindowpanedfromit，thegreatestwondertolittlechildrenisthesnow。Tomen，itissomethinglikeacrucibleinwhichtheirworldmeltsintoawhitestartenmillionmilesaway。 ThemanwhocanstandthetestisaSnowMan；andthisishisreadingbyFahrenheit，Reaumur，orMoses’scarventabletsofstone。 NighthadflutteredasablepinionabovethecanyonofBigLostRiver，andIurgedmyhorsetowardtheBayHorseRanchbecausethesnowwasdeepening。Theflakeswereaslargeasanhour’scirculartattingbyMissWilkins’sablestspinster，betokeningaheavysnowfallandlessentertainmentandmoreadventurethanthecompletionofthetattingcouldpromise。IknewRossCurtisoftheBayHorse，andthatIwouldbewelcomeasasnow—boundpilgrim，bothforhospitality’ssakeandbecauseRosshadfewchancestoconfideinlivingcreatureswhodidnotneigh，bellow，bleat，yelp，orhowlduringhisdiscourse。 TheranchhousewasjustwithinthejawsofthecanyonwhereitsbuildermayhavefatuouslyfanciedthatthetimberedandrockywallsonbothsideswouldhaveprotecteditfromthewintryColoradowinds； butIfearedthedrift。Evennowthroughtheendless，bottomlessriftinthehills——thespeakingtubeofthefourwinds——cameroaringthevoiceoftheproprietortothelittleroomonthetopfloor。 Atmy\"hello，\"aranchhandcamefromanouterbuildingandreceivedmythankfulhorse。Inanotherminute，RossandIsatbyastoveinthedining—roomofthefour—roomranchhouse，whilethebig，simplewelcomeofthehouseholdlayatmydisposal。Fannedbythewhizzingnorther，thefine，drysnowwassiftedandboltedthroughthecracksandknotholesofthelogs。Thecookroom，withoutaseparatingdoor，appended。 InthereIcouldseeashort，sturdy，leisurelyandweather—beatenmanmovingwithprofessionalsurenessabouthisred—hotstove。 Hisfacewasstolidandunreadable——somethinglikethatofagreatthinker，orofonewhohadnothoughtstoconceal。Ithoughthiseyeseemedunwarrantablysuperiortotheelementsandtotheman，butquicklyattributedthattothecharacteristicself—importanceofapettychef。\"Campcook\"wasthenichethatIgavehimintheHallofTypes；andhefitteditasanapplefitsadumpling。 Colditwasinspiteoftheglowingstove；andRossandIsatandtalked，shudderingfrequently，halffromnervesandhalffromthefreezingdraughts。Sohebroughtthebottleandthecookbroughtboilingwater，andwemadeprodigioushottoddiesagainsttheattacksofBoreas。Weclinkedglassesoften。Theysoundedlikeiciclesdroppingfromtheeaves，orlikethetinkleofathousandprismsonaLouisXIVchandelierthatIonceheardataboarder’sdanceintheparlorofaten—a—weekboarding—houseinGramercySquare。~Sictransit。~ SilenceintheterriblebeautyofthesnowandoftheSphinxandofthestars；buttheywhobelievethatallthings，fromawithout—winetabled’hotetothecrucifixion，maybeinterpretedthroughmusic，mighthavefoundanocturneorasymphonytoexpresstheisolationofthatblotted—outworld。Theclinkofglassandbottle，theaeolianchorusofthewindinthehousecrannies，itsdeepertrombonethroughthecanyonbelow，andtheWagneriancrashofthecook’spotsandpans，unitedinafit，discordantmelody，Ithought。NolesswelcomeanaccompanimentwasthesizzlingofbroilinghamandvenisoncutletindorsedbythesolventfumesoftrueJava，bringingrichpromisesofcomforttoouryearningsouls。 Thecookbroughtthesmokingsuppertothetable。Henoddedtomedemocraticallyashecasttheheavyplatesaroundasthoughhewerepitchingquoitsorhurlingthediscus。Ilookedathimwithsomeappraisementandcuriosityandmuchconciliation。Therewasnoprophettotelluswhenthatdriftingeviloutsidemightceasetofall；anditiswell，whensnow—bound，tostandsomewherewithintheradiusofthecook’sfavorableconsideration。ButIcouldreadneitherfavornordisapprovalinthefaceandmannerofourpot—wrestler。 Hewasaboutfivefeetnineinches，andtwohundredpoundsofcommonplace，bull—necked，pink—faced，callouscalm。Heworebrownducktrouserstootightandtooshort，andablueflannelshirtwithsleevesrolledabovehiselbows。Therewasasortofgrim，steadyscowlonhisfeaturesthatlookedtomeasthoughhehadfixedittherepurposelyasaprotectionagainsttheweaknessofaninherentamiabilitythat，hefancied，werebetterconcealed。AndthenIletsupperusurphisbriefoccupancyofmythoughts。 \"Drawup，George，\"saidRoss。\"Let’salleatwhilethegrub’shot。\" \"Youfellowsgoonandchew，\"answeredthecook。\"Iatemineinthekitchenbeforesun—down。\" \"Thinkit’llbeabigsnow，George？\"askedtheranchman。 Georgehadturnedtoreenterthecookroom。Hemovedslowlyaroundand，lookingathisface，itseemedtomethathewasturningoverthewisdomandknowledgeofcenturiesinhishead。 \"Itmight，\"washisdelayedreply。 Atthedoorofthekitchenhestoppedandlookedbackatus。BothRossandIheldourknivesandforkspoisedandgavehimourregard。 Somemenhavethepowerofdrawingtheattentionofotherswithoutspeakingaword。Theirattitudeismoreeffectivethanashout。 \"Andagainitmightn’t，\"saidGeorge，andwentbacktohisstove。 Afterwehadeaten，hecameinandgatheredtheemptieddishes。Hestoodforamoment，whilehisspuriousfrowndeepened。 \"Itmightstopanyminute，\"hesaid，\"oritmightkeepupfordays。\" AtthefartherendofthecookroomIsawGeorgepourhotwaterintohisdishpan，lighthispipe，andputthetablewarethroughitsrequiredlavation。Hethencarefullyunwrappedfromapieceofoldsaddleblanketapaperbackbook，andsettledhimselftoreadbyhisdimoillamp。 Andthentheranchmanthrewtobaccoontheclearedtableandsetforthagainthebottlesandglasses；andIsawthatIstoodinadeepchannelthroughwhichthelongdammedfloodofhisdiscoursewouldsoonbebooming。ButIwashalfcontent，comparingmyfatewiththatofthelateThomasTucker，whohadtosingforhissupper，thusdoublingtheburdensofbothhimselfandhishost。 \"Snowisahellofathing，\"saidRoss，bywayofaforeword。\"Itain’t，somehow，itseemstome，salubrious。Icanstandwaterandmudandtwoinchesbelowzeroandahundredandtenintheshadeandmedium—sizedcyclones，butthisherefuzzywhitestuffnaturallygetsmealllocoed。Ireckonthereasonitrattlesyouisbecauseitchangesthelookofthingssomuch。It’slikeyouhadawifeandleftherinthemorningwiththesameoldbluecottonwrapperon，andridesinofanightandrunsacrossheralloutfittedinawhitesilkeveningfrock，wavinganostrich—featherfan，andmonkeyingwithaposyoflilyflowers。Wouldn’titmakeyoulookforyourpocketcompass？You’dbeliabletokissherbeforeyoucollectedyourpresenceofmind。\" Byandby，thefloodofRoss’stalkwasdrawnupintotheclouds（soitpleasedmetofancy）andtherecondensedintothefinersnowflakesofthought；andwesatsilentaboutthestove，asgoodfriendsandbitterenemieswilldo。IthoughtofBoss’spreambleaboutthemysteriousinfluenceuponmanexertedbythatermine—linedmonsterthatnowcoveredourlittleworld，andknewhewasright。 Ofallthecuriousknickknacks，mysteries，puzzles，Indiangifts，rat—traps，andwell—disguisedblessingsthatthegodschuckdowntousfromtheOlympianpeaks，themostdisquietingandevil—bringingisthesnow。Byscientificanalysisitisabsolutebeautyandpurity——so，atthebeginningwelookdoubtfullyatchemistry。 Itfallsupontheworld，andlo!weliveinanother。Ithidesinanighttheoldscarsandfamiliarplaceswithwhichwehavegrownheart—sickorenamored。So，asquietlyaswecan，wehustleonourembroideredrobesandhieusonPrinceCamaralzaman’shorseorinthereindeersleighintothewhitecountrywherethesevencolorsconverge。 Thisiswhenourfancycanovercomethebaneofit。 Butincertainspotsoftheearthcomesthesnow—madness，madeknownbypeopleturnedwildanddistractedbythebewilderingveilthathasobscuredtheonlyworldtheyknow。Inthecities，thewhitefairywhosetsthebrainsofherdupeswhirlingbyawaveofherwandiscastforthecomedyrole。Herdiamondshoebucklesglitterlikefrost； withapirouettesheinvitesthespotlesscarnival。 Butinthewasteplacesthesnowissardonic。Spongingouttheworldoftheoutliers，itgivesnofootholdonanothersphereinreturn。 Itmakesoftheearthafirmamentunderfoot；itleavesusclawingandstumblinginspaceinaninimicalfifthelementwhoseeviloutdoesitsstrangenessandbeauty，ThereNature，lowcomedienne，playshertricksonman。Thoughshehasputhimforthasherhighestproduct，itappearsthatshehasfashionedhimwithwhatseemsalmostincrediblecarelessnessandindexterity。One—sidedandwithoutbalance，withhistwohalvesunequallyfashionedandjoined，mustheeverjoghiseccentricway。Thesnowfalls，thedarknesscapsit，andtheridiculousman—bipedstraysinaccuratecirclesuntilhesuccumbsintheruinsofhisdefectivearchitecture。 Inthethroatofthethirstythesnowisvitriol。Inappearanceasplausibleasthebreakfastfoodoftheangels，itisashotinthemouthasginger，increasingthepangsofthewater—famished。Itisaderivativefromwater，air，andsomecold，uncannyfirefromwhichthecalorichasbeenextracted。Goodhasbeensaidofit；eventhepoets，crazedbyitsspellandshiveringintheiratticsunderitstouch，haveinditedpermanentmelodiescommemorativeofitsbeauty。 Still，tothesaddestovercoatedoptimistitisaplague——acorrodingplaguethatPharaohsuccessfullyside—stepped。Itbeneficentlycoversthewheatfields，swellingthecrop——andtheFlourTrustgetsusbythethroatlikeasuddenquinsy。Itspreadsthetailofitswhitekirtleovertheredseamsoftheruggednorth——andtheAlaskanshortstoryisborn。Etiolatedperfidy，itsheltersthemountaintravelerburrowingfromtheicyair——and，meltingto—morrow，drownshisbrotherinthevalleybelow。 Atitsworstitislockandkeyandcrucible，andthewandofCirce。 Whenitcorralsmaninlonelyranches，mountaincabins，andforesthuts，thesnowmakesapesandtigersofthehardiest。Itturnsthebosomsofweakeronestoglass，theirtonguestoinfants’rattles，theirheartstolawlessnessandspleen。Itisnotallfromtheisolation；thesnowisnotmerelyablockader；itisaChemicalTest。 Itisagoodmanwhocanshowareactionthatisnotchieflycomposedofadrachmortwoofpotashandmagnesia，withtracesofAdam，Ananias，Nebuchadnezzar，andthefretfulporcupine。 Thisisnostory，yousay；well，letitbegin。 Therewasaknockatthedoor（istheopeningnotfullofcontextandreminiscenceoh，bestbuyersofbestsellers？）。 Wedrewthelatch，andinstumbledEtienneGirod（asheafterwardnamedhimself）。Butjustthenhewasnomorethanawormstrugglingforlife，envelopedinakillingwhitechrysalis。 Wedugdownthroughsnow，overcoats，mufflers，andwaterproofs，anddraggedforthalivingthingwithaVanDyckbeardandmarvellousdiamondrings。Weputitthroughtheapprovedcurriculumofsnow— rubbing，hotmilk，andteaspoonfuldosesofwhiskey，workinghimuptoagraduatingclassentitledtoadiplomaofthreefingersofryeinhalfaglassfulofhotwater。OneoftheranchboyshadalreadycomefromthequartersatRoss’sbugle—likeyellandkickedthestranger’sstaggeringponytosomeshelteredcorralwherebeastswereentertained。 LetaparagraphicbiographyofGirodintervene。 Etiennewasanoperasingeroriginally，wegathered；butadversityandthesnowhadmadehim~noncomposvocis~。TheadversityconsistedofthestrandedSanSalvadorOperaCompany，aperiodofhotelsecond— storywork，andthenacareerasaprofessionalpalmist，jumpingfromtowntotown。For，likeotherprofessionalpalmists，everytimeheworkedtheHeartLinetoostronglyheimmediatelymovedalongtheLineofLeastResistance。ThoughEtiennedidnotconfidethistous，wesurmisedthathehadmovedoutintotheduskabouttwentyminutesaheadofaconstable，andhadthusencounteredthesnow。Inhismostsacredbluelanguagehedilateduponthesubjectofsnow；forEtiennewasParis—bornandlovedthesnowwiththesamepassionthatanorchiddoes。 \"Mee—ser—rhable!\"commentedEtienne，andtookanotherthreefingers。 \"Complete，cast—iron，pussy—footed，blank……blank!\"saidRoss，andfollowedsuit。 \"Rotten，\"saidI。 Thecooksaidnothing。Hestoodinthedoorweighingouroutburst； andinsistentlyfrombehindthatfrozenvisageIgottwomessages（viatheM。A。Mwireless）。OnewasthatGeorgeconsideredourvituperationagainstthesnowchildish；theotherwasthatGeorgedidnotloveDagoes。InasmuchasEtiennewasaFrenchman，IconcludedI hadthemessagewrong。SoIqueriedtheother：\"Brighteyes，youdon’treallymeanDagoes，doyou？\"andoverthewirelesscamethreedeathly，psychictaps：\"Yes。\"ThenIreflectedthattoGeorgeallforeignerswereprobably\"Dagoes。\"IhadonceknownanothercampcookwhohadthoughtMons。，Sig。，andMillie（Trans—MississippiforMlle。）wereItaliangivennames；thiscookusedtomarvelthereforeatthepaucityofNeo—Romanprecognomens，andthereforewhynot—— Ihavesaidthatsnowisatestofmen。Foroneday，twodays，Etiennestoodatthewindow，Fletcherizinghisfingernailsandshriekingandmoaningatthemonotony。Tome，Etiennewasjustaboutasunbearableasthesnow；andso，seekingrelief，Iwentoutontheseconddaytolookatmyhorse，slippedonastone，brokemycollarbone，andthereafterunderwentnotthesnowtest，butthetestofflat—on—the—back。Atestthatcomesoncetoooftenforanymantostand。 However，Iboreupcheerfully。Iwasnowmerelyaspectator，andfrommycouchinthebigroomIcouldlieandwatchthehumaninterplaywiththatdetached，impassive，impersonalfeelingwhichFrenchwriterstellusissovaluabletothelitterateur，andAmericanwriterstothefaro—dealer。 \"Ishallgocrazyinthisabominable，mee—ser—rhableplace!\"wasEtienne’sconstantprediction。 \"NeverknewMarkTwaintoboremebefore，\"saidRoss，overandover。 Hesatbytheotherwindow，hourafterhour，aboxofPittsburgstogiesofthelength，strength，andodorofaPittsburggraftscandaldepositedononesideofhim，and\"RoughingIt，\"\"TheJumpingFrog，\" and\"LifeontheMississippi\"ontheother。Foreverychapterhelitanewstogy，puffingfuriously。Thisintime，gavehimarecurrentpremonitionofcramps，gastritis，smoker’scolicorwhateveritistheyhaveinPittsburgafteratoodeepindulgenceingraftscandals。 Tofendoffthecolic，RossresortedtimeandagaintoOldDoctorStill’sAmber—ColoredU。S。A。ColicCure。Result，afterforty—eighthours——nerves。 \"PositivefactIneverknewMarkTwaintomakemetiredbefore。 Positivefact。\"Rossslammed\"RoughingIt\"onthefloor。\"Whenyou’resnowboundthis—awayyouwanttragedy，Iguess。Humorjustseemstobringoutallyourcussedness。Youreadaman’spoor，pitifulattemptstobefunnyanditmakesyousonervousyouwanttotearthebookup，getoutyourbandana，andhaveagood，longcry。\" Attheotherendoftheroom，theFrenchmantookhisfingernailsoutofhismouthlongenoughtoexclaim：\"Humor!Humoratsuchatimeasthees!MyGod，Ishallgocrazyintheesabominable——\" \"Supper，\"announcedGeorge。 ThesemealswerenotthemealsofRabelaiswhosaid，\"thegreatGodmakestheplanetsandwemaketheplattersneat。\"Bythattime，theranch—housemealswerenotaffairsofgusto；theywerementaldistraction，notbodilyprovender。WhattheyweretobelatershallneverbeforgottenbyRossormeorEtienne。 Aftersupper，thestogiesandfingernailsbeganagain。Myshoulderachedwretchedly，andwithhalf—closedeyesItriedtoforgetitbywatchingthedeftmovementsofthestolidcook。 SuddenlyIsawhimcockhisear，likeadog。Then，withaswiftstep，hemovedtothedoor，threwitopen，andstoodthere。 Therestofushadheardnothing。 \"Whatisit，George？\"askedRoss。 Thecookreachedouthishandintothedarknessalongsidethejamb。 Withcarefulprecisionheproddedsomething。Thenhemadeonecarefulstepintothesnow。Hisbackmusclesbulgedalittleunderthearmsashestoopedandlightlyliftedaburden。Anotherstepinsidethedoor，whichheshutmethodicallybehindhim，andhedumpedtheburdenatasafedistancefromthefire。 Hestoodupandfixeduswithasolemneye。NoneofusmovedunderthatOrphicsuspenseuntil，\"Awoman，\"remarkedGeorge。 MissWillieAdamswashername。Vocation，school—teacher。Presentavocation，gettinglostinthesnow。Age，yum—yum（thePersianfortwenty）。TaketothewoodsifyouwoulddescribeMissAdams。 Awillowforgrace；ahickoryforfibre；abirchfortheclearwhitenessofherskin；foreyes，theblueskyseenthroughtreetops； thesilkincocoonsforherhair；hervoice，themurmuroftheeveningJunewindintheleaves；hermouth，theberriesofthewintergreen； fingersaslightasferns；hertoeassmallasadeertrack。Generalimpressionuponthedazedbeholder——youcouldnotseetheforestforthetrees。 Psychology，withacapitalPandthefootofalynx，atthisjuncturestalksintotheranchhouse。Threemen，acook，aprettyyoungwoman——allsnowbound。Countmeoutofit，asIdidnotcount，anyway。I neverdid，withwomen。Countthecookout，ifyoulike。ButnotetheeffectuponRossandEtienneGirod。 RossdumpedMarkTwaininatrunkandlockedthetrunk。Also，hediscardedthePittsburgscandals。Also，heshavedoffathreedays’ beard。 Etienne，beingFrench，beganonthebeardfirst。Hepomadedit，fromalittletubeofgreaseHongroiseinhisvestpocket。Hecombeditwithalittlealuminumcombfromthesamevestpocket。Hetrimmeditwithmanicurescissorsfromthesamevestpocket。HislightandGallicspiritsunderwentasudden，miraculouschange。HehummedablitheSanSalvadorOperaCompanytune；hegrinned，smirked，bowed，pirouetted，twiddled，twaddled，twisted，andtooralooed。Gayly，thenotorioustroubadour，couldnothaveequalledEtienne。 Ross’smethodofadvancewasbrusque，domineering。\"Littlewoman，\" hesaid，\"you’rewelcomehere!\"——andwithwhathethoughtsubtledoublemeaning——\"welcometostayhereaslongasyoulike，snowornosnow。\" MissAdamsthankedhimalittlewildly，someofthewintergreenberriescreepingintothebirchbark。Shelookedaroundhurriedlyasifseekingescape。Buttherewasnone，savethekitchenandtheroomallottedher。Shemadeanexcuseanddisappearedintoherownroom。 LaterI，feigningsleep，heardthefollowing： \"MeesAdams，Iwasalmosttoperislh—die—ofmonotonyw’enyourfairandbeautifulfaceappearintheesmee—ser—rhablehouse。\"Iopenedmystarboardeye。Thebeardwasbeingcurledfuriouslyaroundafinger，theSvengalieyewasrolling，thechairwasbeinghunchedclosertotheschool—teacher’s。\"IamFrench——yousee——temperamental——nervous! Icannotenduretheesdullhoursintheesranchhouse；but——awomancomes!Ah!\"Theshouldersgavenine’rahsandatiger。\"Whatadifference!Allislightandgay；ever’tingsmilew’enyousmile。 Youhave’eart，beauty，grace。My’eartcomesbacktomew’enIfeelyour’eart。So!\"Helaidhishanduponhisvestpocket。Fromthisvantagepointhesuddenlysnatchedattheschool—teacher’sownhand，\"Ah!MeesAdams，ifIcouldonlytellyouhowIad——\" \"Dinner，\"remarkedGeorge。HewasstandingjustbehindtheFrenchman’sear。Hiseyeslookedstraightintotheschool—teacher’seyes。Afterthirtysecondsofsurvey，hislipsmoved，deepintheflinty，frozenmaelstromofhisface：\"Dinner，\"heconcluded，\"willbereadyintwominutes。\" MissAdamsjumpedtoherfeet，relieved。\"Imustgetreadyfordinner，\"shesaidbrightly，andwentintoherroom。 Rosscameinfifteenminuteslate。Afterthedisheshadbeencleanedaway，Iwaiteduntilapropitioustimewhentheroomwastemporarilyoursalone，andtoldhimwhathadhappened。 Hebecamesoexcitedthathelitastogywithoutthinking。\"Yeller— hided，unwashed，palm—readin’skunk，\"hesaidunderhisbreath。\"I’llshoothimfullo’holesifhedon’twatchout——talkin’thatwaytomywife!\" Igaveajumpthatsetmycollarbonebackanotherweek。\"Yourwife!\" Igasped。 \"Well，Imeantomakeherthat，\"heannounced。 Theairintheranchhousetherestofthatdaywastensewithpent—upemotions，oh，bestbuyersofbestsellers。 RosswatchedMissAdamsasahawkdoesahen；hewatchedEtienneasahawkdoesascarecrow，EtiennewatchedMissAdamsasaweaseldoesahenhouse。HepaidnoattentiontoRoss。 TheconditionofMissAdams，intheroleofsought—after，wasfeverish。Latelyescapedfromtheagonyandlongtortureofthewhitecold，whereforhoursNaturehadkeptthelittleschool—teacher’svisionlockedinandturneduponherself，nobodyknowsthroughwhatprofoundfeminineintrospectionsshehadgone。Now，suddenlycastamongmen，insteadoffindingreliefandsecurity，shebeheldherselfplungedanewintootherdiscomforts。Eveninherownroomshecouldheartheloudvoicesofherimposedsuitors。\"I’llblowyoufullo’ holes!\"shoutedRoss。\"Witnesses，\"shriekedEtienne，wavinghishandatthecookandme。Shecouldnothaveknownthepreviousharassedconditionofthemen，frettingunderindoorconditions。Allsheknewwas，thatwhereshehadexpectedthefrankfreemasonryoftheWest，shefoundthesubtletangleoftwomen’sminds，bentuponexactingwhateverromancetheremightbeinhersituation。 ShetriedtododgeRossandtheFrenchmanbyspellsofnursingme。 Theyalsocameovertohelpnurse。Thiscombinationarousedsuchanaturalstateofinvalidcussednessonmypartthattheywereallforcedtoretire。Onceshedidmanagetowhisper：\"Iamsoworriedhere。Idon’tknowwhattodo。\" TowhichIreplied，gently，hitchingupmyshoulder，thatIwasahunch—savantandthattheEighthHouseunderthissign，theMoonbeinginVirgo，showedthateverythingwouldturnoutallright。 ButtwentyminuteslaterIsawEtiennereadingherpalmandfeltthatperhapsImighthavetorecastherhoroscope，andtryforadarkmancomingwithabundle。 Towardsunset，EtienneleftthehouseforafewmomentsandRoss，whohadbeensittingtaciturnandmorose，havingunlockedMarkTwain，madeanotherdash。ItwastypicalRosstalk。 HestoodinfrontofherandlookeddownmajesticallyatthatcoolandperfectspotwhereMissAdams’foreheadmettheneatpartinherfragranthair。First，however，hecastadesperateglanceatme。I wasinaprofoundslumber。 \"Littlewoman，\"hebegan，\"it’scertainlytoughforamanlikemetoseeyoubotheredthisway。You\"——gulp——\"youhavebeenaloneinthisworldtoolong。Youneedaprotector。Imightsaythatatatimelikethisyouneedaprotectortheworstkind——aprotectorwhowouldtakeathree—ringdelightinsmashingthesaffron—coloredkisseroffofanyyeller—skinnedskunkthatmadehimselfobnoxioustoyou。Hem。 Hem。Iamalonelyman，MissAdams。Ihavesofarhadtocarryonmylifewithoutthe\"——gulp——\"sweetradiance\"——gulp——\"ofawomanaroundthehouse。Ifeelespeciallydoggonedlonelyatatimelikethis，whenIamprettynearlocoedfromhavin’tostallindoors，andhenceitwaswithdelightIwelcomedyourfirstappearanceinthishereshack。SincethenIhavebeenpackedjamfullofmoredifferentkindsoffeelings，ornery，mean，dizzy，andsuperb，thanhasfallenmywayinyears。\" MissAdamsmadeauselessmovementtowardescape。TheRosschinstuckfirm。\"Idon’twanttoannoyyou，MissAdams，but，byheck，ifitcomestothatyou’llhavetobeannoyed。AndI’llhavetohavemysay。Thispalm—ticklin’slobofaFrenchmanoughttobekickedofftheplaceandifyou’llsaytheword，offhegoes。ButIdon’twanttodothewrongthing。You’vegottoshowapreference。I’mgettin’ aroundtothepoint，Miss——MissWillie，inmyownbrickfashion。I’vestoodaboutallIcanstandtheselasttwodaysandsomethin’sgottohappen。Thesuspensehereaboutsisenoughtohangasheepherder。 MissWillie\"——helassooedherhandbymainforce——\"justsaytheword。 Youneedsomebodytotakeyourpartallyourlifelong。Willyoumar——\" \"Supper，\"remarkedGeorge，tersely，fromthekitchendoor。 MissAdamshurriedaway。 Rossturnedangrily。\"You——\" \"Ihavebeenrevolvingitinmyhead，\"saidGeorge。 Hebroughtthecoffeepotforwardheavily。Thenbravelythebigplatterofporkandbeans。Thensomberlythepotatoes。Thenprofoundlythebiscuits。\"Ihavebeenrevolvingitinmymind。 Thereain’tnousewaitin’anylongerforSwengalley。Mightaswelleatnow。\" >Frommyexcellentvantage—pointonthecouchIwatchedtheprogressofthatmeal。Ross，muddled，glowering，disappointed；Etienne，eternallyblandishing，attentive，ogling；MissAdams，nervous，pickingatherfood，hesitantaboutansweringquestions，almosthysterical； nowandthenthesolid，flittingshadowofthecook，passingbehindtheirbackslikeaDreadnaughtinafog。 Iusedtoownaclockwhichgurgledinitsthroatthreeminutesbeforeitstruckthehour。Iknow，therefore，theslowfreightofAnticipation。ForIhaveawakenedatthreeinthemorning，heardtheclockgurgle，andwaitedthosethreeminutesforthethreestrokesI knewweretocome。~Alors~。InRoss’sranchhousethatnighttheslowfreightofClimaxwhistledinthedistance。 Etiennebeganitaftersupper。MissAclamshadsuddenlydisplayedalivelyinterestinthekitchenlayoutandIcouldseeherinthere，chattingbrightlyatGeorge——notwithhim——thewhileheduckedhisheadandrattledhispans。 \"Myfren’，\"saidEtienne，exhalingalargecloudfromhiscigaretteandpattingRosslightlyontheshoulderwithabediamondedhandwhich，hunglimpfromayardormoreofbonyarm，\"IseeImus’befrankwithyou。Firs’，becausewearerivals；second，becauseyoutakethesematterssoserious。I——IamFrenchman。Ilovethewomen\" ——hethrewbackhiscurls，baredhisyellowteeth，andblewanunsavorykisstowardthekitchen。\"Itis，Isuppose，atraitofmynation。AllFrenchmenlovethewomen——prettywomen。Now，look： HereIam!\"Hespreadouthisarms。\"Coldoutside!Idetes’thecol—l—l!Snow!Iabominatethemees—ser—rhablesnow!Twomen! This——\"pointingtome——\"an’this!\"Pointingto’Ross。\"Iamdistracted!FortwowholedaysIstan’atthewindowan’tearmy’air!Iamnervous，upset，pr—r—ro—foun’lydistressinsidemy’ead! An’suddenly——be’old!Awoman，anice，pretty，charming，innocen’ youngwoman!I，naturally，rejoice。Ibecomemyselfagain——gay，light—’earted，\"appy。Iaddressmyselftomademoiselle；itpassesthetime。That，m’sieu’，iswotthewomenarefor——passthetime! Entertainment——likethemusic，likethewine! \"Theyappealtothemood，thecaprice，thetemperamen’。Toplaywiththeeswoman，followherthroughherhumor，pursueher——ah!thatisthemos’delightfulwaytosen’thehoursabouttheirbusiness。\" Rossbangedthetable。\"Shutup，youmiserableyellerpup!\"heroared。\"Iobjecttoyourpursuin’anythingoranybodyinmyhouse。 Now，youlistentome，you——\"Hepickeduptheboxofstogiesanduseditonthetableasanemphasizer。Thenoiseofitawoketheattentionofthegirlinthekitchen。Unheeded，shecreptintotheroom。\"Idon’tknowanythingaboutyourFrenchwaysoflovemakin’an’ Idon’tcare。Inmysectionofthecountry，it’sthebestmanwins。 AndI’mthebestmanhere，anddon’tyouforgetit!Thisgirl’sgoin’ tobemine。Thereain’tg’oingtobeanyplaying，orphilandering，orpalmreadingaboutit。I’vemadeupmymindI’llhavethisgirl，andthatsettlesit。Mywordisthelawinthisnecko’thewoods。 She’smine，andassoonasshesaysshe’smine，youpullout。\"Theboxmadeonefinal，tremendouspunctuationpoint。 Etienne’sbravadowasunruffled。\"Ah!thatisnowaytowinawoman，\" hesmiled，easily。\"Imakeprophecyyouwillneverwin’erthatway。 No。Nottheeswoman。Shemus’beplayedalongan’thenkeessed，thischarming，deliciouslittlecreature。Onekees!An’thenyou’aveher。\"Againhedisplayedhisunpleasantteeth。\"ImakeyouabetI willkeesher——\" Asacheerfulchroniclerofdeedsdonewell，itjoysmetorelatethatthehandwhichfelluponEtienne’samorouslipswasnothisown。 Therewasonesuddensound，asofamulekickingalathfence，andthen——throughtheswingingdoorsofoblivionforEtienne。 Ihadseenthisblowdelivered。Itwasanaloof，unstudied，almostabsent—mindedaffair。Ihadthoughtthecookwasrehearsingthepropermethodofturningaflapjack。 Silently，lostinthought，hestoodtherescratchinghishead。Thenhebeganrollingdownhissleeves。 \"You’dbettergetyourthingson，Miss，andwe’llgetoutofhere，\" hedecided。\"Wrapupwarm。\" Iheardherheavealittlesighofreliefasshewenttogethercloak，sweater，andhat。 Rossjumpedtohisfeet，andsaid：\"George，whatareyougoin’ todo？\" George，whohadbeenheadedinmydirection，slowlyswivelledaroundandfacedhisemployer。\"Bein’acampcook，Iain’tover—burdenedwithhosses，\"Georgeenlightenedus。\"Therefore，Iamgoingtotrytoborrowthisfeller’shere。\" Forthefirsttimeinfourdaysmysoulgaveagenuinecheer。\"Ifit’sforLochinvarpurposes，goasfarasyoulike，\"Isaid，grandly。 Thecookstudiedmeamoment，asiftryingtofindaninsultinmywords。\"No，\"hereplied。\"It’sformineandtheyounglady’spurposes，andwe’llgoonlythreemiles——toHicksville。Nowletmetellyousomethin’，Ross。\"SuddenlyIwasconfrontedwiththecook’schunkybackandIheardalow，curt，carryingvoiceshootthroughtheroomatmyhost。GeorgehadwheeledjustasRossstartedtospeak。 \"You’renutty。That’swhat’sthematterwithyou。Youcan’tstandthesnow。You’regettingnervouser，andnuttiereveryday。ThatandthisDago\"——hejerkedathumbatthehalf—deadFrenchmaninthecorner——\"hasgotyoutothepointwhereIthoughtIbetterhornin。 IgottorevolvingitaroundinmymindandIseenifsomethin’ wasn’tdone，anddonesoon，there’dbemurderaroundhereandmaybe\" ——hisheadgaveanimperceptiblelisttowardthegirl’sroom——\"worse。\" Hestopped，butheheldupastubbyfingertokeepanyoneelsefromspeaking。Thenheplowedslowlythroughthedriftofhisideas。 \"Aboutthisherewoman。Iknowyou，Ross，andIknowwhatyoureelythinkaboutwomen。Ifshehadn’thappenedinheredurin’thisheresnow，you’dneverhavegiventwothoughtstothewholewomanquestion。 Likewise，whenthestormclears，andyouandtheboysgohustlin’out，thisherewholebusiness’llclearoutofyourheadandyouwon’tthinkofaskirtagainuntilKingdomCome。Justbecauseo’thissnowhere，don’tforgetyou’relivingintheselfsameworldyouwasinfourdaysago。Andyou’rethesameman，too。Now，what’stheuseo’ gettingallsnarledupoverfourdaysofstickin’inthehouse？Thatthere’swhatIbeenrevolvin’inmymindandthishere’sthedecisionI’vecometo。\" Heploddedtothedoorandshoutedtooneoftheranchhandstosaddlemyhorse。 Rosslitastogyandstoodthoughtfulinthemiddleoftheroom。Thenhebegan：\"I’veadurngoodnotion，George，toknockyourconfoundedheadoffandthrowyouintothatsnowbank，if——\" \"You’rewrong，mister。Thatain’tadurnedgoodnotionyou’vegot。 It’sdurnedbad。Lookhere!\"Hepointedsteadilyoutofdoorsuntilwewerebothforcedtofollowhisfinger。\"You’reinhereformore’naweekyet。\"Afterallowingthisfacttosinkin，hebarkedoutatRoss：\"Canyoucook？\"Thenatme：\"Canyoucook？\"ThenhelookedatthewreckofEtienneandsniffed。 TherewasanembarrassingsilenceasRossandIthoughtsolemnlyofafoodlessweek。 \"Ifyoujustusehosssense，\"concludedGeorge，\"anddon’tgofortohurtmyfeelin’s，allIwanttodoistotakethisyounggaldowntoHicksville；andthenI’llheadbackhereandcookferyou。\" ThehorseandMissAdamsarrivedsimultaneously，bothofthemveryseriousandquiet。Thehorsebecauseheknewwhathehadbeforehiminthatweather；thegirlbecauseofwhatshehadleftbehind。 ThenallatonceIawoketoarealizationofwhatthecookwasdoing。 \"MyGod，man!\"Icried，\"aren’tyouafraidtogooutinthatsnow？\" BehindmybackIheardRossmutter，\"Nothim。\" Georgeliftedthegirldaintilyupbehindthesaddle，drewonhisgloves，puthisfootinthestirrup，andturnedtoinspectmeleisurely。 AsIpassedslowlyinhisreview，Isawinmymind’seyethealgebraicequationofSnow，theequalssign，andtheanswerinthemanbeforeme。 \"Snowismylastname，\"saidGeorge。HeswungintothesaddleandtheystartedcautiouslyoutintothedarkeningswirloffreshnewcurrencyjustissuingfromtheSnowdropMint。Thegirl，tokeepherplace，clunghappilytothesturdyfigureofthecampcook。 IbroughtthreethingsawayfromRossCurtis’sranchhouse——yes，four。Onewastheappreciationofsnow，whichIhavesohumblytriedheretorender；（2）wasacollarbone，ofwhichIamextracareful；（3）wasamemoryofwhatitistoeatveryextremelybadfoodforaweek；and（4）wasthecauseof（3）alittlenotedeliveredattheendoftheweekandhand—paintedinbluepencilonasheetofmeatpaper。 \"Icannotcomebacktheretothattherejob。Mrs。Snowsayno，George。Ibeenrevolvin’itinmymind；considerin’circumstancesshe’sright。\"