Hecametohimselfwithaslightstart，andbecameawareofanoppressive，crushingdesolation。Itwasonlyafeeling，itistrue，butitproducedonhimaphysicaleffect，asthoughhischesthadbeensqueezedinavice。Heperceivedhimselfsoextremelyforlornandlamentable，andwasmovedsodeeplybytheoppressivesorrow，thatanotherturnofthescrew，hefelt，wouldbringtearsoutofhiseyes。
Hewasdeteriorating。Fiveyearsoflifeincommonhadappeasedhislonging。Yes，long-timeago。Thefirstfivemonthsdidthat——but……
Therewasthehabit——thehabitofherperson，ofhersmile，ofhergestures，ofhervoice，ofhersilence。Shehadapurebrowandgoodhair。Howutterlywretchedallthiswas。Goodhairandfineeyes——remarkablyfine。Hewassurprisedbythenumberofdetailsthatintrudeduponhisunwillingmemory。Hecouldnothelprememberingherfootsteps，therustleofherdress，herwayofholdingherhead，herdecisivemannerofsaying\"Alvan，\"thequiverofhernostrilswhenshewasannoyed。Allthathadbeensomuchhisproperty，sointimatelyandspeciallyhis！Heragedinamournful，silentway，ashetookstockofhislosses。Hewaslikeamancountingthecostofanunluckyspeculation——irritated，depressed——exasperatedwithhimselfandwithothers，withthefortunate，withtheindifferent，withthecallous；
yetthewrongdonehimappearedsocruelthathewouldperhapshavedroppedatearoverthatspoliationifithadnotbeenforhisconvictionthatmendonotweep。Foreignersdo；theyalsokillsometimesinsuchcircumstances。Andtohishorrorhefelthimselfdriventoregretalmostthattheusagesofasocietyreadytoforgivetheshootingofaburglarforbadehim，underthecircumstances，evenasmuchasathoughtofmurder。Nevertheless，heclenchedhisfistsandsethisteethhard。Andhewasafraidatthesametime。Hewasafraidwiththatpenetratingfalteringfearthatseems，intheverymiddleofabeat，toturnone’sheartintoahandfulofdust。Thecontaminationofhercrimespreadout，taintedtheuniverse，taintedhimself；wokeupallthedormantinfamiesoftheworld；causedaghastlykindofclairvoyanceinwhichhecouldseethetownsandfieldsoftheearth，itssacredplaces，itstemplesanditshouses，peopledbymonsters——bymonstersofduplicity，lust，andmurder。Shewasamonster——hehimselfwasthinkingmonstrousthoughts……andyethewaslikeotherpeople。Howmanymenandwomenatthisverymomentwereplungedinabominations——meditatedcrimes。Itwasfrightfultothinkof。Herememberedallthestreets——thewell-to-dostreetshehadpassedonhiswayhome；alltheinnumerablehouseswithcloseddoorsandcurtainedwindows。Eachseemednowanabodeofanguishandfolly。Andhisthought，asifappalled，stoodstill，recallingwithdismaythedecorousandfrightfulsilencethatwaslikeaconspiracy；thegrim，impenetrablesilenceofmilesofwallsconcealingpassions，misery，thoughtsofcrime。Surelyhewasnottheonlyman；hiswasnottheonlyhouse……andyetnooneknew——nooneguessed。Butheknew。Heknewwithunerringcertitudethatcouldnotbedeceivedbythecorrectsilenceofwalls，ofcloseddoors，ofcurtainedwindows。Hewasbesidehimselfwithadespairingagitation，likeamaninformedofadeadlysecret——thesecretofacalamitythreateningthesafetyofmankind——thesacredness，thepeaceoflife。
Hecaughtsightofhimselfinoneofthelooking-glasses。Itwasarelief。Theanguishofhisfeelinghadbeensopowerfulthathemorethanhalfexpectedtoseesomedistortedwildfacethere，andhewaspleasantlysurprisedtoseenothingofthekind。Hisaspect，atanyrate，wouldletnooneintothesecretofhispain。Heexaminedhimselfwithattention。Histrouserswereturnedup，andhisbootsalittlemuddy，buthelookedverymuchasusual。Onlyhishairwasslightlyruffled，andthatdisorder，somehow，wassosuggestiveoftroublethathewentquicklytothetable，andbegantousethebrushes，inananxiousdesiretoobliteratethecompromisingtrace，thatonlyvestigeofhisemotion。Hebrushedwithcare，watchingtheeffectofhissmoothing；andanotherface，slightlypaleandmoretensethanwasperhapsdesirable，peeredbackathimfromthetoiletglass。Helaidthebrushesdown，andwasnotsatisfied。Hetookthemupagainandbrushed，brushedmechanically——forgothimselfinthatoccupation。Thetumultofhisthoughtsendedinasluggishflowofreflection，suchas，aftertheoutburstofavolcano，thealmostimperceptibleprogressofastreamoflava，creepinglanguidlyoveraconvulsedlandandpitilesslyobliteratinganylandmarkleftbytheshockoftheearthquake。Itisadestructivebut，bycomparison，itisapeacefulphenomenon。AlvanHerveywasalmostsoothedbythedeliberatepaceofhisthoughts。Hismorallandmarksweregoingonebyone，consumedinthefireofhisexperience，buriedinhotmud，inashes。Hewascooling——onthesurface；buttherewasenoughheatleftsomewheretomakehimslapthebrushesonthetable，andturningaway，sayinafiercewhisper：\"Iwishhimjoy……Damnthewoman。\"
Hefelthimselfutterlycorruptedbyherwickedness，andthemostsignificantsymptomofhismoraldownfallwasthebitter，acridsatisfactionwithwhichherecognizedit。He，deliberately，sworeinhisthoughts；hemeditatedsneers；heshapedinprofoundsilencewordsofcynicalunbelief，andhismostcherishedconvictionsstoodrevealedfinallyasthenarrowprejudicesoffools。Acrowdofshapeless，uncleanthoughtscrossedhismindinastealthyrush，likeabandofveiledmalefactorshasteningtoacrime。Heputhishandsdeepintohispockets。Heheardafaintringingsomewhere，andmutteredtohimself：\"Iamnottheonlyone……nottheonlyone。\"Therewasanotherring。Frontdoor！
Hisheartleapedupintohisthroat，andforthwithdescendedaslowashisboots。Acall！Who？Why？Hewantedtorushoutonthelandingandshouttotheservant：\"Notathome！Goneawayabroad！\"……Anyexcuse。Hecouldnotfaceavisitor。Notthisevening。No。To-morrow……Beforehecouldbreakoutofthenumbnessthatenvelopedhimlikeasheetoflead，heheardfarbelow，asifintheentrailsoftheearth，adoorcloseheavily。Thehousevibratedtoitmorethantoaclapofthunder。Hestoodstill，wishinghimselfinvisible。Theroomwasverychilly。Hedidnotthinkhewouldeverfeellikethat。Butpeoplemustbemet——theymustbefaced——talkedto——smiledat。Heheardanotherdoor，muchnearer——thedoorofthedrawing-room——beingopenedandflungtoagain。Heimaginedforamomenthewouldfaint。
Howabsurd！Thatkindofthinghadtobegonethrough。Avoicespoke。
Hecouldnotcatchthewords。Thenthevoicespokeagain，andfootstepswereheardonthefirstfloorlanding。Hangitall！Washetohearthatvoiceandthosefootstepswheneveranyonespokeormoved？Hethought：\"Thisislikebeinghaunted——Isupposeitwilllastforaweekorso，atleast。TillIforget。Forget！Forget！\"Someonewascomingupthesecondflightofstairs。Servant？Helistened，then，suddenly，asthoughanincredible，frightfulrevelationhadbeenshoutedtohimfromadistance，hebellowedoutintheemptyroom：\"What！What！\"insuchafiendishtoneastoastonishhimself。
Thefootstepsstoppedoutsidethedoor。Hestoodopenmouthed，maddenedandstill，asifinthemidstofacatastrophe。Thedoor-handlerattledlightly。Itseemedtohimthatthewallswerecomingapart，thatthefurnitureswayedathim；theceilingslantedqueerlyforamoment，atallwardrobetriedtotoppleover。Hecaughtholdofsomethinganditwasthebackofachair。Sohehadreeledagainstachair！Oh！Confoundit！Hegrippedhard。
Theflamingbutterflypoisedbetweenthejawsofthebronzedragonradiatedaglare，aglarethatseemedtoleapupallatonceintoacrude，blindingfierceness，andmadeitdifficultforhimtodistinguishplainlythefigureofhiswifestandinguprightwithherbacktothecloseddoor。Helookedatherandcouldnotdetectherbreathing。Theharshandviolentlightwasbeatingonher，andhewasamazedtoseeherpreservesowellthecomposureofheruprightattitudeinthatscorchingbrilliancewhich，tohiseyes，envelopedherlikeahotandconsumingmist。Hewouldnothavebeensurprisedifshehadvanishedinitassuddenlyasshehadappeared。Hestaredandlistened；listenedforsomesound，butthesilenceroundhimwasabsolute——asthoughhehadinamomentgrowncompletelydeafaswellasdim-eyed。Thenhishearingreturned，preternaturallysharp。Heheardthepatterofarain-showeronthewindowpanesbehindtheloweredblinds，andbelow，farbelow，intheartificialabyssofthesquare，thedeadenedrollofwheelsandthesplashytrottingofahorse。Heheardagroanalso——verydistinct——intheroom——closetohisear。
Hethoughtwithalarm：\"Imusthavemadethatnoisemyself；\"andatthesameinstantthewomanleftthedoor，steppedfirmlyacrossthefloorbeforehim，andsatdowninachair。Heknewthatstep。Therewasnodoubtaboutit。Shehadcomeback！Andheverynearlysaidaloud\"Ofcourse！\"——suchwashissuddenandmasterfulperceptionoftheindestructiblecharacterofherbeing。Nothingcoulddestroyher——
andnothingbuthisowndestructioncouldkeepheraway。Shewastheincarnationofalltheshortmomentswhicheverymansparesoutofhislifefordreams，forpreciousdreamsthatconcretethemostcherished，themostprofitableofhisillusions。Hepeeredatherwithinwardtrepidation。Shewasmysterious，significant，fullofobscuremeaning——likeasymbol。Hepeered，bendingforward，asthoughhehadbeendiscoveringaboutherthingshehadneverseenbefore。Unconsciouslyhemadeasteptowardsher——thenanother。Hesawherarmmakeanample，decidedmovementandhestopped。Shehadliftedherveil。Itwasliketheliftingofavizor。
Thespellwasbroken。Heexperiencedashockasthoughhehadbeencalledoutofatrancebythesuddennoiseofanexplosion。Itwasevenmorestartlingandmoredistinct；itwasaninfinitelymoreintimatechange，forhehadthesensationofhavingcomeintothisroomonlythatverymoment；ofhavingreturnedfromveryfar；hewasmadeawarethatsomeessentialpartofhimselfhadinaflashreturnedintohisbody，returnedfinallyfromafierceandlamentableregion，fromthedwelling-placeofunveiledhearts。Hewokeuptoanamazinginfinityofcontempt，toadrollbitternessofwonder，toadisenchantedconvictionofsafety。Hehadaglimpseoftheirresistibleforce，andhesawalsothebarrennessofhisconvictions——ofherconvictions。Itseemedtohimthathecouldnevermakeamistakeaslongashelived。Itwasmorallyimpossibletogowrong。Hewasnotelatedbythatcertitude；hewasdimlyuneasyaboutitsprice；therewasachillasofdeathinthistriumphofsoundprinciples，inthisvictorysnatchedundertheveryshadowofdisaster。
Thelasttraceofhispreviousstateofmindvanished，astheinstantaneousandelusivetrailofaburstingmeteorvanishesontheprofoundblacknessofthesky；itwasthefaintflickerofapainfulthought，goneassoonasperceived，thatnothingbutherpresence——afterall——hadthepowertorecallhimtohimself。Hestaredather。Shesatwithherhandsonherlap，lookingdown；andhenoticedthatherbootsweredirty，herskirtswetandsplashed，asthoughshehadbeendrivenbacktherebyablindfearthroughawasteofmud。Hewasindignant，amazedandshocked，butinanatural，healthywaynow；sothathecouldcontrolthoseunprofitablesentimentsbythedictatesofcautiousself-restraint。Thelightintheroomhadnounusualbrilliancenow；itwasagoodlightinwhichhecouldeasilyobservetheexpressionofherface。Itwasthatofdullfatigue。Andthesilencethatsurroundedthemwasthenormalsilenceofanyquiethouse，hardlydisturbedbythefaintnoisesofarespectablequarterofthetown。Hewasverycool——anditwasquitecoollythathethoughthowmuchbetteritwouldbeifneitherofthemeverspokeagain。Shesatwithclosedlips，withanairoflassitudeinthestonyforgetfulnessofherpose，butafteramomentsheliftedherdroopingeyelidsandmethistenseandinquisitivestarebyalookthathadalltheformlesseloquenceofacry。Itpenetrated，itstirredwithoutinforming；itwastheveryessenceofanguishstrippedofwordsthatcanbesmiledat，arguedaway，shouteddown，disdained。
Itwasanguishnakedandunashamed，thebarepainofexistenceletlooseupontheworldinthefleetingunreserveofalookthathadinitanimmensityoffatigue，thescornfulsincerity，theblackimpudenceofanextortedconfession。AlvanHerveywasseizedwithwonder，asthoughhehadseensomethinginconceivable；andsomeobscurepartofhisbeingwasreadytoexclaimwithhim：\"Iwouldneverhavebelievedit！\"butaninstantaneousrevulsionofwoundedsusceptibilitiescheckedtheunfinishedthought。
Hefeltfullofrancorousindignationagainstthewomanwhocouldlooklikethisatone。Thislookprobedhim；ittamperedwithhim。Itwasdangeroustooneaswouldbeahintofunbeliefwhisperedbyapriestintheaugustdecorumofatemple；andatthesametimeitwasimpure，itwasdisturbing，likeacynicalconsolationmutteredinthedark，taintingthesorrow，corrodingthethought，poisoningtheheart。Hewantedtoaskherfuriously：\"Whodoyoutakemefor？Howdareyoulookatmelikethis？\"Hefelthimselfhelplessbeforethehiddenmeaningofthatlook；heresenteditwithpainedandfutileviolenceasaninjurysosecretthatitcouldnever，neverberedressed。Hiswishwastocrushherbyasinglesentence。Hewasstainless。Opinionwasonhisside；morality，menandgodswereonhisside；law，conscience——alltheworld！Shehadnothingbutthatlook。Andhecouldonlysay：
\"Howlongdoyouintendtostayhere？\"
Hereyesdidnotwaver，herlipsremainedclosed；andforanyeffectofhiswordshemighthavespokentoadeadwoman，onlythatthisonebreathedquickly。Hewasprofoundlydisappointedbywhathehadsaid。
Itwasagreatdeception，somethinginthenatureoftreason。Hehaddeceivedhimself。Itshouldhavebeenaltogetherdifferent——otherwords——anothersensation。Andbeforehiseyes，sofixedthatattimestheysawnothing，shesatapparentlyasunconsciousasthoughshehadbeenalone，sendingthatlookofbrazenconfessionstraightathim——withanairofstaringintoemptyspace。Hesaidsignificantly：
\"MustIgothen？\"Andheknewhemeantnothingofwhatheimplied。
Oneofherhandsonherlapmovedslightlyasthoughhiswordshadfallenthereandshehadthrownthemoffonthefloor。Buthersilenceencouragedhim。Possiblyitmeantremorse——perhapsfear。Wasshethunderstruckbyhisattitude？……Hereyelidsdropped。Heseemedtounderstandeversomuch——everything！Verywell——butshemustbemadetosuffer。Itwasduetohim。Heunderstoodeverything，yethejudgeditindispensabletosaywithanobviousaffectationofcivility：
\"Idon’tunderstand——besogoodasto……\"
Shestoodup。Forasecondhebelievedsheintendedtogoaway，anditwasasthoughsomeonehadjerkedastringattachedtohisheart。Ithurt。Heremainedopen-mouthedandsilent。Butshemadeanirresolutesteptowardshim，andinstinctivelyhemovedaside。Theystoodbeforeoneanother，andthefragmentsofthetornletterlaybetweenthem——attheirfeet——likeaninsurmountableobstacle，likeasignofeternalseparation！Aroundthemthreeothercouplesstoodstillandfacetoface，asifwaitingforasignaltobeginsomeaction——astruggle，adispute，oradance。
Shesaid：\"Don’t——Alvan！\"andtherewassomethingthatresembledawarninginthepainofhertone。Henarrowedhiseyesasiftryingtopierceherwithhisgaze。Hervoicetouchedhim。Hehadaspirationsaftermagnanimity，generosity，superiority——interrupted，however，byflashesofindignationandanxiety——frightfulanxietytoknowhowfarshehadgone。Shelookeddownatthetornpaper。Thenshelookedup，andtheireyesmetagain，remainedfastenedtogether，likeanunbreakablebond，likeaclaspofeternalcomplicity；andthedecoroussilence，thepervadingquietudeofthehousewhichenvelopedthismeetingoftheirglancesbecameforamomentinexpressiblyvile，forhewasafraidshewouldsaytoomuchandmakemagnanimityimpossible，whilebehindtheprofoundmournfulnessofherfacetherewasaregret——aregretofthingsdone——theregretofdelay——thethoughtthatifshehadonlyturnedbackaweeksooner——adaysooner——onlyanhoursooner……Theywereafraidtohearagainthesoundoftheirvoices；theydidnotknowwhattheymightsay——perhapssomethingthatcouldnotberecalled；andwordsaremoreterriblethanfacts。ButthetrickyfatalitythatlurksinobscureimpulsesspokethroughAlvanHervey’slipssuddenly；andheheardhisownvoicewiththeexcitedandscepticalcuriositywithwhichonelistenstoactors’
voicesspeakingonthestageinthestrainofapoignantsituation。
\"Ifyouhaveforgottenanything……ofcourse……I……\"
Hereyesblazedathimforaninstant；herlipstrembled——andthenshealsobecamethemouth-pieceofthemysteriousforceforeverhoveringnearus；ofthatperverseinspiration，wanderingcapriciousanduncontrollable，likeagustofwind。
\"Whatisthegoodofthis，Alvan？……YouknowwhyIcameback……YouknowthatIcouldnot……\"
Heinterruptedherwithirritation。
\"Then！what’sthis？\"heasked，pointingdownwardsatthetornletter。
\"That’samistake，\"shesaidhurriedly，inamuffledvoice。
Thisansweramazedhim。Heremainedspeechless，staringather。Hehadhalfamindtoburstintoalaugh。Itendedinasmileasinvoluntaryasagrimaceofpain。
\"Amistake……\"hebegan，slowly，andthenfoundhimselfunabletosayanotherword。
\"Yes……itwashonest，\"shesaidverylow，asifspeakingtothememoryofafeelinginaremotepast。
Heexploded。
\"Curseyourhonesty！……Isthereanyhonestyinallthis！……
Whendidyoubegintobehonest？Whyareyouhere？Whatareyounow？……Stillhonest？……\"
Hewalkedather，raging，asifblind；duringthesethreequickstrideshelosttouchofthematerialworldandwaswhirledinterminablythroughakindofemptyuniversemadeupofnothingbutfuryandanguish，tillhecamesuddenlyuponherface——veryclosetohis。Hestoppedshort，andallatonceseemedtoremembersomethingheardagesago。
\"Youdon’tknowthemeaningoftheword，\"heshouted。
Shedidnotflinch。Heperceivedwithfearthateverythingaroundhimwasstill。Shedidnotmoveahair’sbreadth；hisownbodydidnotstir。Animperturbablecalmenvelopedtheirtwomotionlessfigures，thehouse，thetown，alltheworld——andthetriflingtempestofhisfeelings。Theviolenceoftheshorttumultwithinhimhadbeensuchascouldwellhaveshatteredallcreation；andyetnothingwaschanged。
Hefacedhiswifeinthefamiliarroominhisownhouse。Ithadnotfallen。Andrightandleftalltheinnumerabledwellings，standingshouldertoshoulder，hadresistedtheshockofhispassion，hadpresented，unmoved，tothelonelinessofhistrouble，thegrimsilenceofwalls，theimpenetrableandpolisheddiscretionofcloseddoorsandcurtainedwindows。Immobilityandsilencepressedonhim，assailedhim，liketwoaccomplicesoftheimmovableandmutewomanbeforehiseyes。Hewassuddenlyvanquished。Hewasshownhisimpotence。Hewassoothedbythebreathofacorruptresignationcomingtohimthroughthesubtleironyofthesurroundingpeace。
Hesaidwithvillainouscomposure：
\"Atanyrateitisn’tenoughforme。Iwanttoknowmore——ifyou’regoingtostay。\"
\"Thereisnothingmoretotell，\"sheanswered，sadly。
Itstruckhimassoverytruethathedidnotsayanything。Shewenton：
\"Youwouldn’tunderstand……\"
\"No？\"hesaid，quietly。Heheldhimselftightnottoburstintohowlsandimprecations。
\"Itriedtobefaithful……\"shebeganagain。
\"Andthis？\"heexclaimed，pointingatthefragmentsofherletter。
\"This——thisisafailure，\"shesaid。
\"Ishouldthinkso，\"hemuttered，bitterly。
\"Itriedtobefaithfultomyself——Alvan——and……andhonesttoyou……\"
\"Ifyouhadtriedtobefaithfultomeitwouldhavebeenmoretothepurpose，\"heinterrupted，angrily。\"I’vebeenfaithfultoyouandyouhavespoiledmylife——bothourlives……\"Thenafterapausetheunconquerablepreoccupationofselfcameout，andheraisedhisvoicetoaskresentfully，\"And，pray，forhowlonghaveyoubeenmakingafoolofme？\"
Sheseemedhorriblyshockedbythatquestion。Hedidnotwaitforananswer，butwentonmovingaboutallthetime；nowandthencominguptoher，thenwanderingoffrestlesslytotheotherendoftheroom。
\"Iwanttoknow。Everybodyknows，Isuppose，butmyself——andthat’syourhonesty！\"
\"Ihavetoldyouthereisnothingtoknow，\"shesaid，speakingunsteadilyasifinpain。\"Nothingofwhatyousuppose。Youdon’tunderstandme。Thisletteristhebeginning——andtheend。\"
\"Theend——thisthinghasnoend，\"heclamoured，unexpectedly。\"Can’tyouunderstandthat？Ican……Thebeginning……\"
Hestoppedandlookedintohereyeswithconcentratedintensity，withadesiretosee，topenetrate，tounderstand，thatmadehimpositivelyholdhisbreathtillhegasped。
\"ByHeavens！\"hesaid，standingperfectlystillinapeeringattitudeandwithinlessthanafootfromher。
\"ByHeavens！\"herepeated，slowly，andinatonewhoseinvoluntarystrangenesswasacompletemysterytohimself。\"ByHeavens——Icouldbelieveyou——Icouldbelieveanything——now！\"
Heturnedshortonhisheelandbegantowalkupanddowntheroomwithanairofhavingdisburdenedhimselfofthefinalpronouncementofhislife——ofhavingsaidsomethingonwhichhewouldnotgoback，evenifhecould。Sheremainedasifrootedtothecarpet。Hereyesfollowedtherestlessmovementsoftheman，whoavoidedlookingather。Herwidestareclungtohim，inquiring，wonderinganddoubtful。
\"Butthefellowwasforeverstickinginhere，\"heburstout，distractedly。\"Hemadelovetoyou，Isuppose——and，and……\"Heloweredhisvoice。\"And——youlethim。\"
\"AndIlethim，\"shemurmured，catchinghisintonation，sothathervoicesoundedunconscious，soundedfaroffandslavish，likeanecho。
Hesaidtwice，\"You！You！\"violently，thencalmeddown。\"Whatcouldyouseeinthefellow？\"heasked，withunaffectedwonder。\"Aneffeminate，fatass。Whatcouldyou……Weren’tyouhappy？Didn’tyouhaveallyouwanted？Now——frankly；didIdeceiveyourexpectationsinanyway？Wereyoudisappointedwithourposition——orwithourprospects——perhaps？Youknowyoucouldn’tbe——theyaremuchbetterthanyoucouldhopeforwhenyoumarriedme……\"
Heforgothimselfsofarastogesticulatealittlewhilehewentonwithanimation：
\"Whatcouldyouexpectfromsuchafellow？He’sanoutsider——arankoutsider……Ifithadn’tbeenformymoney……doyouhear？……formymoney，hewouldn’tknowwheretoturn。Hispeoplewon’thaveanythingtodowithhim。Thefellow’snoclass——noclassatall。
He’suseful，certainly，that’swhyI……Ithoughtyouhadenoughintelligencetoseeit……Andyou……No！It’sincredible！Whatdidhetellyou？Doyoucarefornoone’sopinion——istherenorestraininginfluenceintheworldforyou——women？Didyouevergivemeathought？Itriedtobeagoodhusband。DidIfail？Tellme——whathaveIdone？\"
Carriedawaybyhisfeelingshetookhisheadinbothhishandsandrepeatedwildly：
\"WhathaveIdone？……Tellme！What？……\"
\"Nothing，\"shesaid。
\"Ah！Yousee……youcan’t……\"hebegan，triumphantly，walkingaway；thensuddenly，asthoughhehadbeenflungbackatherbysomethinginvisiblehehadmet，hespunroundandshoutedwithexasperation：
\"Whatonearthdidyouexpectmetodo？\"
Withoutawordshemovedslowlytowardsthetable，and，sittingdown，leanedonherelbow，shadinghereyeswithherhand。Allthattimeheglaredatherwatchfullyasifexpectingeverymomenttofindinherdeliberatemovementsananswertohisquestion。Buthecouldnotreadanything，hecouldgathernohintofherthought。Hetriedtosuppresshisdesiretoshout，andafterwaitingawhile，saidwithincisivescorn：
\"Didyouwantmetowriteabsurdverses；tositandlookatyouforhours——totalktoyouaboutyoursoul？YououghttohaveknownI
wasn’tthatsort……Ihadsomethingbettertodo。ButifyouthinkIwastotallyblind……\"
Heperceivedinaflashthathecouldrememberaninfinityofenlighteningoccurrences。Hecouldrecalleversomanydistinctoccasionswhenhecameuponthem；herememberedtheabsurdlyinterruptedgestureofhisfat，whitehand，theraptexpressionofherface，theglitterofunbelievingeyes；snatchesofincomprehensibleconversationsnotworthlisteningto，silencesthathadmeantnothingatthetimeandseemednowilluminatinglikeaburstofsunshine。Herememberedallthat。Hehadnotbeenblind。Oh！No！Andtoknowthiswasanexquisiterelief：itbroughtbackallhiscomposure。
\"Ithoughtitbeneathmetosuspectyou，\"hesaid，loftily。
Thesoundofthatsentenceevidentlypossessedsomemagicalpower，because，assoonashehadspoken，hefeltwonderfullyatease；anddirectlyafterwardsheexperiencedaflashofjoyfulamazementatthediscoverythathecouldbeinspiredtosuchnobleandtruthfulutterance。Hewatchedtheeffectofhiswords。Theycausedhertoglancetohimquicklyoverhershoulder。Hecaughtaglimpseofweteyelashes，ofaredcheekwithatearrunningdownswiftly；andthensheturnedawayagainandsatasbefore，coveringherfacewithherhands。
\"Yououghttobeperfectlyfrankwithme，\"hesaid，slowly。
\"Youknoweverything，\"sheanswered，indistinctly，throughherfingers。
\"Thisletter……Yes……but……\"
\"AndIcameback，\"sheexclaimedinastifledvoice；\"youknoweverything。\"
\"Iamgladofit——foryoursake，\"hesaidwithimpressivegravity。Helistenedtohimselfwithsolemnemotion。Itseemedtohimthatsomethinginexpressiblymomentouswasinprogresswithintheroom，thateverywordandeverygesturehadtheimportanceofeventspreordainedfromthebeginningofallthings，andsummingupintheirfinalitythewholepurposeofcreation。
\"Foryoursake，\"herepeated。
Hershouldersshookasthoughshehadbeensobbing，andheforgothimselfinthecontemplationofherhair。Suddenlyhegaveastart，asifwakingup，andaskedverygentlyandnotmuchaboveawhisper——
\"Haveyoubeenmeetinghimoften？\"
\"Never！\"shecriedintothepalmsofherhands。
Thisanswerseemedforamomenttotakefromhimthepowerofspeech。
Hislipsmovedforsometimebeforeanysoundcame。
\"Youpreferredtomakelovehere——undermyverynose，\"hesaid，furiously。Hecalmeddowninstantly，andfeltregretfullyuneasy，asthoughhehadlethimselfdowninherestimationbythatoutburst。
Sherose，andwithherhandonthebackofthechairconfrontedhimwitheyesthatwereperfectlydrynow。Therewasaredspotoneachofhercheeks。
\"WhenImadeupmymindtogotohim——Iwrote，\"shesaid。
\"Butyoudidn’tgotohim，\"hetookupinthesametone。\"Howfardidyougo？Whatmadeyoucomeback？\"
\"Ididn’tknowmyself，\"shemurmured。Nothingofhermovedbutherlips。Hefixedhersternly。
\"Didheexpectthis？Washewaitingforyou？\"heasked。
Sheansweredhimbyanalmostimperceptiblenod，andhecontinuedtolookatherforagoodwhilewithoutmakingasound。Then，atlast——
\"AndIsupposeheiswaitingyet？\"heasked，quickly。
Againsheseemedtonodathim。Forsomereasonhefelthemustknowthetime。Heconsultedhiswatchgloomily。Half-pastseven。
\"Ishe？\"hemuttered，puttingthewatchinhispocket。Helookedupather，and，asifsuddenlyovercomebyasenseofsinisterfun，gaveashort，harshlaugh，directlyrepressed。
\"No！It’sthemostunheard！……\"hemumbledwhileshestoodbeforehimbitingherlowerlip，asifplungedindeepthought。Helaughedagaininonelowburstthatwasasspitefulasanimprecation。Hedidnotknowwhyhefeltsuchanoverpoweringandsuddendistasteforthefactsofexistence——forfactsingeneral——suchanimmensedisgustatthethoughtofallthemanydaysalreadylivedthrough。Hewaswearied。Thinkingseemedalabourbeyondhisstrength。Hesaid——
\"Youdeceivedme——nowyoumakeafoolofhim……It’sawful！Why？\"
\"Ideceivedmyself！\"sheexclaimed。
\"Oh！Nonsense！\"hesaid，impatiently。
\"Iamreadytogoifyouwishit，\"shewenton，quickly。\"Itwasduetoyou——tobetold——toknow。No！Icouldnot！\"shecried，andstoodstillwringingherhandsstealthily。
\"Iamgladyourepentedbeforeitwastoolate，\"hesaidinadulltoneandlookingathisboots。\"Iamglad……somesparkofbetterfeeling，\"hemuttered，asiftohimself。Helifteduphisheadafteramomentofbroodingsilence。\"Iamgladtoseethatthereissomesenseofdecencyleftinyou，\"headdedalittlelouder。Lookingatherheappearedtohesitate，asifestimatingthepossibleconsequencesofwhathewishedtosay，andatlastblurtedout——
\"Afterall，Ilovedyou……\"
\"Ididnotknow，\"shewhispered。
\"GoodGod！\"hecried。\"WhydoyouimagineImarriedyou？\"
Theindelicacyofhisobtusenessangeredher。
\"Ah——why？\"shesaidthroughherteeth。
Heappearedovercomewithhorror，andwatchedherlipsintentlyasthoughinfear。
\"Iimaginedmanythings，\"shesaid，slowly，andpaused。Hewatched，holdinghisbreath。Atlastshewentonmusingly，asifthinkingaloud，\"Itriedtounderstand。Itriedhonestly……Why？……Todotheusualthing——Isuppose……Topleaseyourself。\"
Hewalkedawaysmartly，andwhenhecameback，closetoher，hehadaflushedface。
\"Youseemedprettywellpleased，too——atthetime，\"hehissed，withscathingfury。\"Ineedn’taskwhetheryoulovedme。\"
\"IknownowIwasperfectlyincapableofsuchathing，\"shesaid，calmly，\"IfIhad，perhapsyouwouldnothavemarriedme。\"
\"It’sveryclearIwouldnothavedoneitifIhadknownyou——asI
knowyounow。\"
Heseemedtoseehimselfproposingtoher——agesago。Theywerestrollinguptheslopeofalawn。Groupsofpeoplewerescatteredinsunshine。Theshadowsofleafyboughslaystillontheshortgrass。
Thecolouredsunshadesfaroff，passingbetweentrees，resembleddeliberateandbrilliantbutterfliesmovingwithoutaflutter。Mensmilingamiably，orelseverygrave，withintheimpeccableshelteroftheirblackcoats，stoodbythesideofwomenwho，clusteredinclearsummertoilettes，recalledallthefabuloustalesofenchantedgardenswhereanimatedflowerssmileatbewitchedknights。Therewasasumptuousserenityinitall，athin，vibratingexcitement，theperfectsecurity，asofaninvincibleignorance，thatevokedwithinhimatranscendentbeliefinfelicityasthelotofallmankind，arecklesslypicturesquedesiretogetpromptlysomethingforhimselfonly，outofthatsplendourunmarredbyanyshadowofathought。Thegirlwalkedbyhissideacrossanopenspace；noonewasnear，andsuddenlyhestoodstill，asifinspired，andspoke。Herememberedlookingatherpureeyes，athercandidbrow；herememberedglancingaboutquicklytoseeiftheywerebeingobserved，andthinkingthatnothingcouldgowronginaworldofsomuchcharm，purity，anddistinction。Hewasproudofit。Hewasoneofitsmakers，ofitspossessors，ofitsguardians，ofitsextollers。Hewantedtograspitsolidly，togetasmuchgratificationashecouldoutofit；andinviewofitsincomparablequality，ofitsunstainedatmosphere，ofitsnearnesstotheheavenofitschoice，thisgustofbrutaldesireseemedthemostnobleofaspirations。Inasecondhelivedagainthroughallthesemoments，andthenallthepathosofhisfailurepresenteditselftohimwithsuchvividnessthattherewasasuspicionoftearsinhistonewhenhesaidalmostunthinkingly，\"MyGod！Ididloveyou！\"
Sheseemedtouchedbytheemotionofhisvoice。Herlipsquiveredalittle，andshemadeonefalteringsteptowardshim，puttingoutherhandsinabeseechinggesture，whensheperceived，justintime，thatbeingabsorbedbythetragedyofhislifehehadabsolutelyforgottenherveryexistence。Shestopped，andheroutstretchedarmsfellslowly。He，withhisfeaturesdistortedbythebitternessofhisthought，sawneitherhermovementnorhergesture。Hestampedhisfootinvexation，rubbedhishead——thenexploded。
\"WhatthedevilamItodonow？\"
Hewasstillagain。Sheseemedtounderstand，andmovedtothedoorfirmly。
\"It’sverysimple——I’mgoing，\"shesaidaloud。
Atthesoundofhervoicehegaveastartofsurprise，lookedatherwildly，andaskedinapiercingtone——
\"You……Where？Tohim？\"
\"No——alone——good-bye。\"
Thedoor-handlerattledunderhergropinghandasthoughshehadbeentryingtogetoutofsomedarkplace。
\"No——stay！\"hecried。
Sheheardhimfaintly。Hesawhershouldertouchthelintelofthedoor。Sheswayedasifdazed。Therewaslessthanasecondofsuspensewhiletheybothfeltasifpoisedontheveryedgeofmoralannihilation，readytofallintosomedevouringnowhere。Then，almostsimultaneously，heshouted，\"Comeback！\"andsheletgothehandleofthedoor。Sheturnedroundinpeacefuldesperationlikeonewhodeliberatelyhasthrownawaythelastchanceoflife；and，foramoment，theroomshefacedappearedterrible，anddark，andsafe——likeagrave。
Hesaid，veryhoarseandabrupt：\"Itcan’tendlikethis……Sitdown；\"andwhileshecrossedtheroomagaintothelow-backedchairbeforethedressing-table，heopenedthedoorandputhisheadouttolookandlisten。Thehousewasquiet。Hecamebackpacified，andasked——
\"Doyouspeakthetruth？\"
Shenodded。
\"Youhavelivedalie，though，\"hesaid，suspiciously。
\"Ah！Youmadeitsoeasy，\"sheanswered。
\"Youreproachme——me！\"
\"HowcouldI？\"shesaid；\"Iwouldhaveyounoother——now。\"
\"Whatdoyoumeanby……\"hebegan，thencheckedhimself，andwithoutwaitingforananswerwenton，\"Iwon’taskanyquestions。Isthislettertheworstofit？\"
Shehadanervousmovementofherhands。
\"Imusthaveaplainanswer，\"hesaid，hotly。
\"Then，no！Theworstismycomingback。\"
Therefollowedaperiodofdeadsilence，duringwhichtheyexchangedsearchingglances。
Hesaidauthoritatively——
\"Youdon’tknowwhatyouaresaying。Yourmindisunhinged。Youarebesideyourself，oryouwouldnotsaysuchthings。Youcan’tcontrolyourself。Eveninyourremorse……\"Hepausedamoment，thensaidwithadoctoralair：\"Self-restraintiseverythinginlife，youknow。It’shappiness，it’sdignity……it’severything。\"
Shewaspullingnervouslyatherhandkerchiefwhilehewentonwatchinganxiouslytoseetheeffectofhiswords。Nothingsatisfactoryhappened。Only，ashebegantospeakagain，shecoveredherfacewithbothherhands。
\"Youseewherethewantofself-restraintleadsto。
Pain——humiliation——lossofrespect——offriends，ofeverythingthatennobleslife，that……Allkindsofhorrors，\"heconcluded，abruptly。
Shemadenostir。Helookedatherpensivelyforsometimeasthoughhehadbeenconcentratingthemelancholythoughtsevokedbythesightofthatabasedwoman。Hiseyesbecamefixedanddull。Hewasprofoundlypenetratedbythesolemnityofthemoment；hefeltdeeplythegreatnessoftheoccasion。Andmorethaneverthewallsofhishouseseemedtoenclosethesacrednessofidealstowhichhewasabouttoofferamagnificentsacrifice。Hewasthehighpriestofthattemple，thesevereguardianofformulas，ofrites，ofthepureceremonialconcealingtheblackdoubtsoflife。Andhewasnotalone。
Othermen，too——thebestofthem——keptwatchandwardbythehearthstonesthatwerethealtarsofthatprofitablepersuasion。Heunderstoodconfusedlythathewaspartofanimmenseandbeneficentpower，whichhadarewardreadyforeverydiscretion。Hedweltwithintheinvinciblewisdomofsilence；hewasprotectedbyanindestructiblefaiththatwouldlastforever，thatwouldwithstandunshakenalltheassaults——theloudexecrationsofapostates，andthesecretwearinessofitsconfessors！Hewasinleaguewithauniverseofuntoldadvantages。Herepresentedthemoralstrengthofabeautifulreticencethatcouldvanquishallthedeplorablecruditiesoflife——fear，disaster，sin——evendeathitself。Itseemedtohimhewasonthepointofsweepingtriumphantlyawayalltheillusorymysteriesofexistence。Itwassimplicityitself。
\"Ihopeyouseenowthefolly——theutterfollyofwickedness，\"hebeganinadull，solemnmanner。\"Youmustrespecttheconditionsofyourlifeorloseallitcangiveyou。All！Everything！\"
Hewavedhisarmonce，andthreeexactreplicasofhisface，ofhisclothes，ofhisdullseverity，ofhissolemngrief，repeatedthewidegesturethatinitscomprehensivesweepindicatedaninfinityofmoralsweetness，embracedthewalls，thehangings，thewholehouse，allthecrowdofhousesoutside，alltheflimsyandinscrutablegravesoftheliving，withtheirdoorsnumberedlikethedoorsofprison-cells，andasimpenetrableasthegraniteoftombstones。
\"Yes！Restraint，duty，fidelity——unswervingfidelitytowhatisexpectedofyou。This——onlythis——securesthereward，thepeace。
Everythingelseweshouldlabourtosubdue——todestroy。It’smisfortune；it’sdisease。Itisterrible——terrible。Wemustnotknowanythingaboutit——weneedn’t。Itisourdutytoourselves——toothers。
Youdonotliveallaloneintheworld——andifyouhavenorespectforthedignityoflife，othershave。Lifeisaseriousmatter。Ifyoudon’tconformtothehigheststandardsyouarenoone——it’sakindofdeath。Didn’tthisoccurtoyou？You’veonlytolookroundyoutoseethetruthofwhatIamsaying。Didyoulivewithoutnoticinganything，withoutunderstandinganything？Fromachildyouhadexamplesbeforeyoureyes——youcouldseedailythebeauty，theblessingsofmorality，ofprinciples……\"
Hisvoiceroseandfellpompouslyinastrangechant。Hiseyeswerestill，hisstareexaltedandsullen；hisfacewasset，washard，waswoodenlyexultingoverthegriminspirationthatsecretlypossessedhim，seethedwithinhim，liftedhimupintoastealthyfrenzyofbelief。Nowandthenhewouldstretchouthisrightarmoverherhead，asitwere，andhespokedownatthatsinnerfromaheight，andwithasenseofavengingvirtue，withaprofoundandpurejoyasthoughhecouldfromhissteeppinnacleseeeveryweightywordstrikeandhurtlikeapunishingstone。
\"Rigidprinciples——adherencetowhatisright，\"hefinishedafterapause。
\"Whatisright？\"shesaid，distinctly，withoutuncoveringherface。
\"Yourmindisdiseased！\"hecried，uprightandaustere。\"Suchaquestionisrot——utterrot。Lookroundyou——there’syouranswer，ifyouonlycaretosee。Nothingthatoutragesthereceivedbeliefscanberight。Yourconsciencetellsyouthat。Theyarethereceivedbeliefsbecausetheyarethebest，thenoblest，theonlypossible。
Theysurvive……\"
Hecouldnothelpnoticingwithpleasurethephilosophicbreadthofhisview，buthecouldnotpausetoenjoyit，forhisinspiration，thecallofaugusttruth，carriedhimon。
\"Youmustrespectthemoralfoundationsofasocietythathasmadeyouwhatyouare。Betruetoit。That’sduty——that’shonour——that’shonesty。\"
Hefeltagreatglowwithinhim，asthoughhehadswallowedsomethinghot。Hemadeastepnearer。Shesatupandlookedathimwithanardourofexpectationthatstimulatedhissenseofthesupremeimportanceofthatmoment。Andasifforgettinghimselfheraisedhisvoiceverymuch。
\"’What’sright？’youaskme。Thinkonly。Whatwouldyouhavebeenifyouhadgoneoffwiththatinfernalvagabond？……Whatwouldyouhavebeen？……You！Mywife！……\"
Hecaughtsightofhimselfinthepierglass，drawnuptohisfullheight，andwithafacesowhitethathiseyes，atthedistance，resembledtheblackcavitiesinaskull。Hesawhimselfasifabouttolaunchimprecations，witharmsupliftedaboveherbowedhead。Hewasashamedofthatunseemlyposture，andputhishandsinhispocketshurriedly。Shemurmuredfaintly，asiftoherself——
\"Ah！WhatamInow？\"
\"AsithappensyouarestillMrs。AlvanHervey——uncommonlyluckyforyou，letmetellyou，\"hesaidinaconversationaltone。Hewalkeduptothefurthestcorneroftheroom，and，turningback，sawhersittingveryupright，herhandsclaspedonherlap，andwithalost，unswervinggazeofhereyeswhichstaredunwinkingliketheeyesoftheblind，atthecrudegasflame，blazingandstill，betweenthejawsofthebronzedragon。
Hecameupquiteclosetoher，andstraddlinghislegsalittle，stoodlookingdownatherfaceforsometimewithouttakinghishandsoutofhispockets。Heseemedtobeturningoverinhismindaheapofwords，piecinghisnextspeechoutofanoverpoweringabundanceofthoughts。
\"You’vetriedmetotheutmost，\"hesaidatlast；andassoonashesaidthesewordshelosthismoralfooting，andfelthimselfsweptawayfromhispinnaclebyafloodofpassionateresentmentagainstthebunglingcreaturethathadcomesoneartospoilinghislife。\"Yes；
I’vebeentriedmorethananymanoughttobe，\"hewentonwithrighteousbitterness。\"Itwasunfair。Whatpossessedyouto？……
Whatpossessedyou？……Writesucha……Afterfiveyearsofperfecthappiness！’Ponmyword，noonewouldbelieve……Didn’tyoufeelyoucouldn’t？Becauseyoucouldn’t……itwasimpossible——youknow。Wasn’tit？Think。Wasn’tit？\"
\"Itwasimpossible，\"shewhispered，obediently。
Thissubmissiveassentgivenwithsuchreadinessdidnotsoothehim，didnotelatehim；itgavehim，inexplicably，thatsenseofterrorweexperiencewheninthemidstofconditionswehadlearnedtothinkabsolutelysafewediscoverallatoncethepresenceofanearandunsuspecteddanger。Itwasimpossible，ofcourse！Heknewit。Sheknewit。Sheconfessedit。Itwasimpossible！Thatmanknewit，too——aswellasanyone；couldn’thelpknowingit。Andyetthosetwohadbeenengagedinaconspiracyagainsthispeace——inacriminalenterpriseforwhichtherecouldbenosanctionofbeliefwithinthemselves。
Therecouldnotbe！Therecouldnotbe！Andyethownearto……Withashortthrillhesawhimselfanexiledforlornfigureinarealmofungovernable，ofunrestrainedfolly。Nothingcouldbeforeseen，foretold——guardedagainst。Andthesensationwasintolerable，hadsomethingofthewitheringhorrorthatmaybeconceivedasfollowingupontheutterextinctionofallhope。Intheflashofthoughtthedishonouringepisodeseemedtodisengageitselffromeverythingactual，fromearthlyconditions，andevenfromearthlysuffering；itbecamepurelyaterrifyingknowledge，anannihilatingknowledgeofablindandinfernalforce。Somethingdesperateandvague，aflickerofaninsanedesiretoabasehimselfbeforethemysteriousimpulsesofevil，toaskformercyinsomeway，passedthroughhismind；andthencametheidea，thepersuasion，thecertitude，thattheevilmustbeforgotten——mustberesolutelyignoredtomakelifepossible；thattheknowledgemustbekeptoutofmind，outofsight，liketheknowledgeofcertaindeathiskeptoutofthedailyexistenceofmen。Hestiffenedhimselfinwardlyfortheeffort，andnextmomentitappearedveryeasy，amazinglyfeasible，ifoneonlykeptstrictlytofacts，gaveone’smindtotheirperplexitiesandnottotheirmeaning。
