`Ashillingaleg？’criedToad。`Ifyouplease，Imusttakealittletimetoworkthatout，andseejustwhatitcomesto。’
Heclimbeddownoffhishorse，andleftittograze，andsatdownbythegipsy，anddidsumsonhisfingers，andatlasthesaid，`Ashillingaleg？Why，thatcomestoexactlyfourshillings，andnomore。O，no；Icouldnotthinkofacceptingfourshillingsforthisbeautifulyounghorseofmine。’
`Well，’saidthegipsy，`I’lltellyouwhatIwilldo。I’llmakeitfiveshillings，andthat’sthree-and-sixpencemorethantheanimal’sworth。Andthat’smylastword。’
ThenToadsatandponderedlonganddeeply。Forhewashungryandquitepenniless，andstillsomeway——heknewnothowfar——
fromhome，andenemiesmightstillbelookingforhim。Tooneinsuchasituation，fiveshillingsmayverywellappearalargesumofmoney。Ontheotherhand，itdidnotseemverymuchtogetforahorse。Butthen，again，thehorsehadn’tcosthimanything；sowhateverhegotwasallclearprofit。Atlasthesaidfirmly，`Lookhere，gipsy！Itellyouwhatwewilldo；andthisisMYlastword。Youshallhandmeoversixshillingsandsixpence，cashdown；andfurther，inadditionthereto，youshallgivemeasmuchbreakfastasIcanpossiblyeat，atonesittingofcourse，outofthatironpotofyoursthatkeepssendingforthsuchdeliciousandexcitingsmells。Inreturn，I
willmakeovertoyoumyspiritedyounghorse，withallthebeautifulharnessandtrappingsthatareonhim，freelythrownin。Ifthat’snotgoodenoughforyou，sayso，andI’llbegettingon。Iknowamannearherewho’swantedthishorseofmineforyears。’
Thegipsygrumbledfrightfully，anddeclaredifhedidafewmoredealsofthatsorthe’dberuined。Butintheendheluggedadirtycanvasbagoutofthedepthsofhistrouserpocket，andcountedoutsixshillingsandsixpenceintoToad’spaw。Thenhedisappearedintothecaravanforaninstant，andreturnedwithalargeironplateandaknife，fork，andspoon。Hetiltedupthepot，andagloriousstreamofhotrichstewgurgledintotheplate。Itwas，indeed，themostbeautifulstewintheworld，beingmadeofpartridges，andpheasants，andchickens，andhares，andrabbits，andpea-hens，andguinea-fowls，andoneortwootherthings。Toadtooktheplateonhislap，almostcrying，andstuffed，andstuffed，andstuffed，andkeptaskingformore，andthegipsynevergrudgedithim。Hethoughtthathehadnevereatensogoodabreakfastinallhislife。
WhenToadhadtakenasmuchstewonboardashethoughthecouldpossiblyhold，hegotupandsaidgood-byetothegipsy，andtookanaffectionatefarewellofthehorse；andthegipsy，whoknewtheriversidewell，gavehimdirectionswhichwaytogo，andhesetforthonhistravelsagaininthebestpossiblespirits。Hewas，indeed，averydifferentToadfromtheanimalofanhourago。Thesunwasshiningbrightly，hiswetclotheswerequitedryagain，hehadmoneyinhispocketoncemore，hewasnearinghomeandfriendsandsafety，and，mostandbestofall，hehadhadasubstantialmeal，hotandnourishing，andfeltbig，andstrong，andcareless，andself-confident。
Ashetrampedalonggaily，hethoughtofhisadventuresandescapes，andhowwhenthingsseemedattheirworsthehadalwaysmanagedtofindawayout；andhisprideandconceitbegantoswellwithinhim。`Ho，ho！’hesaidtohimselfashemarchedalongwithhischinintheair，`whatacleverToadIam！Thereissurelynoanimalequaltomeforclevernessinthewholeworld！Myenemiesshutmeupinprison，encircledbysentries，watchednightanddaybywarders；Iwalkoutthroughthemall，bysheerabilitycoupledwithcourage。Theypursuemewithengines，andpolicemen，andrevolvers；Isnapmyfingersatthem，andvanish，laughing，intospace。Iam，unfortunately，thrownintoacanalbyawomanfatofbodyandveryevil-minded。Whatofit？
Iswimashore，Iseizeherhorse，Irideoffintriumph，andI
sellthehorseforawholepocketfulofmoneyandanexcellentbreakfast！Ho，ho！IamTheToad，thehandsome，thepopular，thesuccessfulToad！’Hegotsopuffedupwithconceitthathemadeupasongashewalkedinpraiseofhimself，andsangitatthetopofhisvoice，thoughtherewasnoonetohearitbuthim。Itwasperhapsthemostconceitedsongthatanyanimalevercomposed。
`TheworldhasheldgreatHeroes，Ashistory-bookshaveshowed；
ButneveranametogodowntofameComparedwiththatofToad！
`TheclevermenatOxfordKnowallthatthereistobeknowed。
ButtheynoneofthemknowonehalfasmuchAsintelligentMr。Toad！
`TheanimalssatintheArkandcried，Theirtearsintorrentsflowed。
Whowasitsaid，\"There’slandahead？\"
EncouragingMr。Toad！
`ThearmyallsalutedAstheymarchedalongtheroad。
WasittheKing？OrKitchener？
No。ItwasMr。Toad。
`TheQueenandherLadies-in-waitingSatatthewindowandsewed。
Shecried，\"Look！who’sthatHANDSOMEman？\"
Theyanswered，\"Mr。Toad。\"’
Therewasagreatdealmoreofthesamesort，buttoodreadfullyconceitedtobewrittendown。Thesearesomeofthemilderverses。
Hesangashewalked，andhewalkedashesang，andgotmoreinflatedeveryminute。Buthispridewasshortlytohaveaseverefall。
Aftersomemilesofcountrylaneshereachedthehighroad，andasheturnedintoitandglancedalongitswhitelength，hesawapproachinghimaspeckthatturnedintoadotandthenintoablob，andthenintosomethingveryfamiliar；andadoublenoteofwarning，onlytoowellknown，fellonhisdelightedear。
`Thisissomethinglike！’saidtheexcitedToad。`Thisisreallifeagain，thisisoncemorethegreatworldfromwhichIhavebeenmissedsolong！Iwillhailthem，mybrothersofthewheel，andpitchthemayarn，ofthesortthathasbeensosuccessfulhitherto；andtheywillgivemealift，ofcourse，andthenI
willtalktothemsomemore；and，perhaps，withluck，itmayevenendinmydrivinguptoToadHallinamotor-car！ThatwillbeoneintheeyeforBadger！’
Hesteppedconfidentlyoutintotheroadtohailthemotor-
car，whichcamealongataneasypace，slowingdownasitnearedthelane；whensuddenlyhebecameverypale，hisheartturnedtowater，hiskneesshookandyieldedunderhim，andhedoubledupandcollapsedwithasickeningpaininhisinterior。Andwellhemight，theunhappyanimal；fortheapproachingcarwastheveryonehehadstolenoutoftheyardoftheRedLionHotelonthatfataldaywhenallhistroublesbegan！Andthepeopleinitweretheverysamepeoplehehadsatandwatchedatluncheoninthecoffee-room！
Hesankdowninashabby，miserableheapintheroad，murmuringtohimselfinhisdespair，`It’sallup！It’sallovernow！
Chainsandpolicemenagain！Prisonagain！Drybreadandwateragain！O，whatafoolIhavebeen！WhatdidIwanttogostruttingaboutthecountryfor，singingconceitedsongs，andhailingpeopleinbroaddayonthehighroad，insteadofhidingtillnightfallandslippinghomequietlybybackways！OhaplessToad！Oill-fatedanimal！’
Theterriblemotor-cardrewslowlynearerandnearer，tillatlasthehearditstopjustshortofhim。Twogentlemengotoutandwalkedroundthetremblingheapofcrumpledmiserylyingintheroad，andoneofthemsaid，`Odear！thisisverysad！
Hereisapooroldthing——awasherwomanapparently——whohasfaintedintheroad！Perhapssheisovercomebytheheat，poorcreature；orpossiblyshehasnothadanyfoodto-day。Letusliftherintothecarandtakehertothenearestvillage，wheredoubtlessshehasfriends。’
TheytenderlyliftedToadintothemotor-carandproppedhimupwithsoftcushions，andproceededontheirway。
WhenToadheardthemtalkinsokindandsympatheticaway，andknewthathewasnotrecognised，hiscouragebegantorevive，andhecautiouslyopenedfirstoneeyeandthentheother。
`Look！’saidoneofthegentlemen，`sheisbetteralready。Thefreshairisdoinghergood。Howdoyoufeelnow，ma’am？’
`Thankyoukindly，Sir，’saidToadinafeeblevoice，`I’mfeelingagreatdealbetter！’`That’sright，’saidthegentleman。`Nowkeepquitestill，and，aboveall，don’ttrytotalk。’
`Iwon’t，’saidToad。`Iwasonlythinking，ifImightsitonthefrontseatthere，besidethedriver，whereIcouldgetthefreshairfullinmyface，Ishouldsoonbeallrightagain。’
`Whataverysensiblewoman！’saidthegentleman。`Ofcourseyoushall。’SotheycarefullyhelpedToadintothefrontseatbesidethedriver，andontheywentagain。
Toadwasalmosthimselfagainbynow。Hesatup，lookedabouthim，andtriedtobeatdownthetremors，theyearnings，theoldcravingsthatroseupandbesethimandtookpossessionofhimentirely。
`Itisfate！’hesaidtohimself。`Whystrive？whystruggle？’
andheturnedtothedriverathisside。
`Please，Sir，’hesaid，`Iwishyouwouldkindlyletmetryanddrivethecarforalittle。I’vebeenwatchingyoucarefully，anditlookssoeasyandsointeresting，andIshouldliketobeabletotellmyfriendsthatonceIhaddrivenamotor-car！’
Thedriverlaughedattheproposal，soheartilythatthegentlemaninquiredwhatthematterwas。Whenheheard，hesaid，toToad’sdelight，`Bravo，ma’am！Ilikeyourspirit。
Letherhaveatry，andlookafterher。Shewon’tdoanyharm。’
Toadeagerlyscrambledintotheseatvacatedbythedriver，tookthesteering-wheelinhishands，listenedwithaffectedhumilitytotheinstructionsgivenhim，andsetthecarinmotion，butveryslowlyandcarefullyatfirst，forhewasdeterminedtobeprudent。
Thegentlemenbehindclappedtheirhandsandapplauded，andToadheardthemsaying，`Howwellshedoesit！Fancyawasherwomandrivingacaraswellasthat，thefirsttime！’
Toadwentalittlefaster；thenfasterstill，andfaster。
Heheardthegentlemencalloutwarningly，`Becareful，washerwoman！’Andthisannoyedhim，andhebegantolosehishead。
Thedrivertriedtointerfere，buthepinnedhimdowninhisseatwithoneelbow，andputonfullspeed。Therushofairinhisface，thehumoftheengines，andthelightjumpofthecarbeneathhimintoxicatedhisweakbrain。`Washerwoman，indeed！’
heshoutedrecklessly。`Ho！ho！IamtheToad，themotor-carsnatcher，theprison-breaker，theToadwhoalwaysescapes！Sitstill，andyoushallknowwhatdrivingreallyis，foryouareinthehandsofthefamous，theskilful，theentirelyfearlessToad！’
Withacryofhorrorthewholepartyroseandflungthemselvesonhim。`Seizehim！’theycried，`seizetheToad，thewickedanimalwhostoleourmotor-car！Bindhim，chainhim，draghimtothenearestpolice-station！DownwiththedesperateanddangerousToad！’
Alas！theyshouldhavethought，theyoughttohavebeenmoreprudent，theyshouldhaverememberedtostopthemotor-carsomehowbeforeplayinganypranksofthatsort。Withahalf-turnofthewheeltheToadsentthecarcrashingthroughthelowhedgethatranalongtheroadside。Onemightybound，aviolentshock，andthewheelsofthecarwerechurningupthethickmudofahorse-pond。
Toadfoundhimselfflyingthroughtheairwiththestrongupwardrushanddelicatecurveofaswallow。Helikedthemotion，andwasjustbeginningtowonderwhetheritwouldgoonuntilhedevelopedwingsandturnedintoaToad-bird，whenhelandedonhisbackwithathump，inthesoftrichgrassofameadow。
Sittingup，hecouldjustseethemotor-carinthepond，nearlysubmerged；thegentlemenandthedriver，encumberedbytheirlongcoats，wereflounderinghelplesslyinthewater。
Hepickedhimselfuprapidly，andsetoffrunningacrosscountryashardashecould，scramblingthroughhedges，jumpingditches，poundingacrossfields，tillhewasbreathlessandweary，andhadtosettledownintoaneasywalk。Whenhehadrecoveredhisbreathsomewhat，andwasabletothinkcalmly，hebegantogiggle，andfromgigglinghetooktolaughing，andhelaughedtillhehadtositdownunderahedge。`Ho，ho！’hecried，inecstasiesofself-admiration，`Toadagain！Toad，asusual，comesoutonthetop！Whowasitgotthemtogivehimalift？Whomanagedtogetonthefrontseatforthesakeoffreshair？Whopersuadedthemintolettinghimseeifhecoulddrive？Wholandedthemallinahorse-pond？Whoescaped，flyinggailyandunscathedthroughtheair，leavingthenarrow-minded，grudging，timidexcursionistsinthemudwheretheyshouldrightlybe？
Why，Toad，ofcourse；cleverToad，greatToad，GOODToad！’
Thenheburstintosongagain，andchantedwithupliftedvoice——
`Themotor-carwentPoop-poop-poop，Asitracedalongtheroad。
Whowasitsteereditintoapond？
IngeniousMr。Toad！
O，howcleverIam！Howclever，howclever，howveryclev————’
Aslightnoiseatadistancebehindhimmadehimturnhisheadandlook。Ohorror！Omisery！Odespair！
Abouttwofieldsoff，achauffeurinhisleathergaitersandtwolargeruralpolicemenwerevisible，runningtowardshimashardastheycouldgo！
PoorToadsprangtohisfeetandpeltedawayagain，hisheartinhismouth。O，my！’hegasped，ashepantedalong，`whatanASSIam！WhataCONCEITEDandheedlessass！Swaggeringagain！Shoutingandsingingsongsagain！Sittingstillandgassingagain！Omy！Omy！Omy！’
Heglancedback，andsawtohisdismaythattheyweregainingonhim。Onherandesperately，butkeptlookingback，andsawthattheystillgainedsteadily。Hedidhisbest，buthewasafatanimal，andhislegswereshort，andstilltheygained。Hecouldhearthemclosebehindhimnow。Ceasingtoheedwherehewasgoing，hestruggledonblindlyandwildly，lookingbackoverhisshoulderatthenowtriumphantenemy，whensuddenlytheearthfailedunderhisfeet，hegraspedattheair，and，splash！hefoundhimselfheadoverearsindeepwater，rapidwater，waterthatborehimalongwithaforcehecouldnotcontendwith；andheknewthatinhisblindpanichehadrunstraightintotheriver！
Herosetothesurfaceandtriedtograspthereedsandtherushesthatgrewalongthewater’sedgecloseunderthebank，butthestreamwassostrongthatittorethemoutofhishands。`O
my！’gaspedpoorToad，`ifeverIstealamotor-caragain！IfeverIsinganotherconceitedsong’——thendownhewent，andcameupbreathlessandspluttering。Presentlyhesawthathewasapproachingabigdarkholeinthebank，justabovehishead，andasthestreamborehimpasthereachedupwithapawandcaughtholdoftheedgeandheldon。Thenslowlyandwithdifficultyhedrewhimselfupoutofthewater，tillatlasthewasabletoresthiselbowsontheedgeofthehole。Thereheremainedforsomeminutes，puffingandpanting，forhewasquiteexhausted。
Ashesighedandblewandstaredbeforehimintothedarkhole，somebrightsmallthingshoneandtwinkledinitsdepths，movingtowardshim。Asitapproached，afacegrewupgraduallyaroundit，anditwasafamiliarface！
Brownandsmall，withwhiskers。
Graveandround，withneatearsandsilkyhair。
ItwastheWaterRat！
XI
`LIKESUMMERTEMPESTSCAMEHISTEARS’
TheRatputoutaneatlittlebrownpaw，grippedToadfirmlybythescruffoftheneck，andgaveagreathoistandapull；andthewater-loggedToadcameupslowlybutsurelyovertheedgeofthehole，tillatlasthestoodsafeandsoundinthehall，streakedwithmudandweedtobesure，andwiththewaterstreamingoffhim，buthappyandhigh-spiritedasofold，nowthathefoundhimselfoncemoreinthehouseofafriend，anddodgingsandevasionswereover，andhecouldlayasideadisguisethatwasunworthyofhispositionandwantedsuchalotoflivingupto。
`O，Ratty！’hecried。`I’vebeenthroughsuchtimessinceIsawyoulast，youcan’tthink！Suchtrials，suchsufferings，andallsonoblyborne！Thensuchescapes，suchdisguisessuchsubterfuges，andallsocleverlyplannedandcarriedout！Beeninprison——gotoutofit，ofcourse！Beenthrownintoacanal——
swamashore！Stoleahorse——soldhimforalargesumofmoney！
Humbuggedeverybody——made’emalldoexactlywhatIwanted！Oh，IAMasmartToad，andnomistake！Whatdoyouthinkmylastexploitwas？JustholdontillItellyou————’
`Toad，’saidtheWaterRat，gravelyandfirmly，`yougooffupstairsatonce，andtakeoffthatoldcottonragthatlooksasifitmightformerlyhavebelongedtosomewasherwoman，andcleanyourselfthoroughly，andputonsomeofmyclothes，andtryandcomedownlookinglikeagentlemanifyouCAN；foramoreshabby，bedraggled，disreputable-lookingobjectthanyouareI
neverseteyesoninmywholelife！Now，stopswaggeringandarguing，andbeoff！I’llhavesomethingtosaytoyoulater！’
Toadwasatfirstinclinedtostopanddosometalkingbackathim。Hehadhadenoughofbeingorderedaboutwhenhewasinprison，andherewasthethingbeingbegunalloveragain，apparently；andbyaRat，too！However，hecaughtsightofhimselfinthelooking-glassoverthehat-stand，withtherustyblackbonnetperchedrakishlyoveroneeye，andhechangedhismindandwentveryquicklyandhumblyupstairstotheRat’sdressing-room。Therehehadathoroughwashandbrush-up，changedhisclothes，andstoodforalongtimebeforetheglass，contemplatinghimselfwithprideandpleasure，andthinkingwhatutteridiotsallthepeoplemusthavebeentohaveevermistakenhimforonemomentforawasherwoman。
Bythetimehecamedownagainluncheonwasonthetable，andverygladToadwastoseeit，forhehadbeenthroughsometryingexperiencesandhadtakenmuchhardexercisesincetheexcellentbreakfastprovidedforhimbythegipsy。WhiletheyateToadtoldtheRatallhisadventures，dwellingchieflyonhisowncleverness，andpresenceofmindinemergencies，andcunningintightplaces；andrathermakingoutthathehadbeenhavingagayandhighly-colouredexperience。Butthemorehetalkedandboasted，themoregraveandsilenttheRatbecame。
WhenatlastToadhadtalkedhimselftoastandstill，therewassilenceforawhile；andthentheRatsaid，`Now，Toady，Idon’twanttogiveyoupain，afterallyou’vebeenthroughalready；but，seriously，don’tyouseewhatanawfulassyou’vebeenmakingofyourself？Onyourownadmissionyouhavebeenhandcuffed，imprisoned，starved，chased，terrifiedoutofyourlife，insulted，jeeredat，andignominiouslyflungintothewater——byawoman，too！Where’stheamusementinthat？Wheredoesthefuncomein？Andallbecauseyoumustneedsgoandstealamotor-car。Youknowthatyou’veneverhadanythingbuttroublefrommotor-carsfromthemomentyoufirstseteyesonone。ButifyouWILLbemixedupwiththem——asyougenerallyare，fiveminutesafteryou’vestarted——whySTEALthem？Beacripple，ifyouthinkit’sexciting；beabankrupt，forachange，ifyou’vesetyourmindonit：butwhychoosetobeaconvict？
Whenareyougoingtobesensible，andthinkofyourfriends，andtryandbeacredittothem？Doyousupposeit’sanypleasuretome，forinstance，tohearanimalssaying，asIgoabout，thatI’mthechapthatkeepscompanywithgaol-birds？’
Now，itwasaverycomfortingpointinToad’scharacterthathewasathoroughlygood-heartedanimalandnevermindedbeingjawedbythosewhowerehisrealfriends。Andevenwhenmostsetuponathing，hewasalwaysabletoseetheothersideofthequestion。Soalthough，whiletheRatwastalkingsoseriously，hekeptsayingtohimselfmutinously，`ButitWAS
fun，though！Awfulfun！’andmakingstrangesuppressednoisesinsidehim，k-i-ck-ck-ck，andpoop-p-p，andothersoundsresemblingstifledsnorts，ortheopeningofsoda-waterbottles，yetwhentheRathadquitefinished，heheavedadeepsighandsaid，verynicelyandhumbly，`Quiteright，Ratty！HowSOUND
youalwaysare！Yes，I’vebeenaconceitedoldass，Icanquiteseethat；butnowI’mgoingtobeagoodToad，andnotdoitanymore。Asformotor-cars，I’venotbeenatallsokeenaboutthemsincemylastduckinginthatriverofyours。Thefactis，whileIwashangingontotheedgeofyourholeandgettingmybreath，Ihadasuddenidea——areallybrilliantidea——connectedwithmotor-boats——there，there！don’ttakeonso，oldchap，andstamp，andupsetthings；itwasonlyanidea，andwewon’ttalkanymoreaboutitnow。We’llhaveourcoffee，ANDasmoke，andaquietchat，andthenI’mgoingtostrollquietlydowntoToadHall，andgetintoclothesofmyown，andsetthingsgoingagainontheoldlines。I’vehadenoughofadventures。Ishallleadaquiet，steady，respectablelife，potteringaboutmyproperty，andimprovingit，anddoingalittlelandscapegardeningattimes。
Therewillalwaysbeabitofdinnerformyfriendswhentheycometoseeme；andIshallkeepapony-chaisetojogaboutthecountryin，justasIusedtointhegoodolddays，beforeIgotrestless，andwantedtoDOthings。’
`StrollquietlydowntoToadHall？’criedtheRat，greatlyexcited。`Whatareyoutalkingabout？Doyoumeantosayyouhaven’tHEARD？’
`Heardwhat？’saidToad，turningratherpale。`Goon，Ratty！
Quick！Don’tspareme！Whathaven’tIheard？’
`Doyoumeantotellme，’shoutedtheRat，thumpingwithhislittlefistuponthetable，`thatyou’veheardnothingabouttheStoatsandWeasels？’
What，theWildWooders？’criedToad，tremblingineverylimb。
`No，notaword！Whathavetheybeendoing？’
`——Andhowthey’vebeenandtakenToadHall？’continuedtheRat。
Toadleanedhiselbowsonthetable，andhischinonhispaws；
andalargetearwelledupineachofhiseyes，overflowedandsplashedonthetable，plop！plop！
`Goon，Ratty，’hemurmuredpresently；`tellmeall。Theworstisover。Iamananimalagain。Icanbearit。’
`Whenyou——got——intothat——that——troubleofyours，’saidtheRat，slowlyandimpressively；`Imean，whenyou——disappearedfromsocietyforatime，overthatmisunderstandingabouta——amachine，youknow——’
Toadmerelynodded。
`Well，itwasagooddealtalkedaboutdownhere，naturally，’
continuedtheRat，`notonlyalongtheriver-side，butevenintheWildWood。Animalstooksides，asalwayshappens。TheRiver-bankersstuckupforyou，andsaidyouhadbeeninfamouslytreated，andtherewasnojusticetobehadinthelandnowadays。
ButtheWildWoodanimalssaidhardthings，andservedyouright，anditwastimethissortofthingwasstopped。Andtheygotverycocky，andwentaboutsayingyouweredoneforthistime！Youwouldnevercomebackagain，never，never！’
Toadnoddedoncemore，keepingsilence。
`That’sthesortoflittlebeaststheyare，’theRatwenton。
`ButMoleandBadger，theystuckout，throughthickandthin，thatyouwouldcomebackagainsoon，somehow。Theydidn’tknowexactlyhow，butsomehow！’
Toadbegantositupinhischairagain，andtosmirkalittle。
`Theyarguedfromhistory，’continuedtheRat。`Theysaidthatnocriminallawshadeverbeenknowntoprevailagainstcheekandplausibilitysuchasyours，combinedwiththepowerofalongpurse。SotheyarrangedtomovetheirthingsintoToadHall，andsleepthere，andkeepitaired，andhaveitallreadyforyouwhenyouturnedup。Theydidn’tguesswhatwasgoingtohappen，ofcourse；still，theyhadtheirsuspicionsoftheWildWoodanimals。NowIcometothemostpainfulandtragicpartofmystory。Onedarknight——itwasaVERYdarknight，andblowinghard，too，andrainingsimplycatsanddogs——abandofweasels，armedtotheteeth，creptsilentlyupthecarriage-drivetothefrontentrance。Simultaneously，abodyofdesperateferrets，advancingthroughthekitchen-garden，possessedthemselvesofthebackyardandoffices；whileacompanyofskirmishingstoatswhostuckatnothingoccupiedtheconservatoryandthebilliard-room，andheldtheFrenchwindowsopeningontothelawn。
`TheMoleandtheBadgerweresittingbythefireinthesmoking-
room，tellingstoriesandsuspectingnothing，foritwasn’tanightforanyanimalstobeoutin，whenthosebloodthirstyvillainsbrokedownthedoorsandrushedinuponthemfromeveryside。Theymadethebestfighttheycould，butwhatwasthegood？Theywereunarmed，andtakenbysurprise，andwhatcantwoanimalsdoagainsthundreds？Theytookandbeatthemseverelywithsticks，thosetwopoorfaithfulcreatures，andturnedthemoutintothecoldandthewet，withmanyinsultinganduncalled-
forremarks！’
HeretheunfeelingToadbrokeintoasnigger，andthenpulledhimselftogetherandtriedtolookparticularlysolemn。
`AndtheWildWoodershavebeenlivinginToadHalleversince，’
continuedtheRat；`andgoingonsimplyanyhow！Lyinginbedhalftheday，andbreakfastatallhours，andtheplaceinsuchamess（I’mtold）it’snotfittobeseen！Eatingyourgrub，anddrinkingyourdrink，andmakingbadjokesaboutyou，andsingingvulgarsongs，about——well，aboutprisonsandmagistrates，andpolicemen；horridpersonalsongs，withnohumourinthem。Andthey’retellingthetradespeopleandeverybodythatthey’vecometostayforgood。’
`O，havethey！’saidToadgettingupandseizingastick。`I’lljollysoonseeaboutthat！’
`It’snogood，Toad！’calledtheRatafterhim。`You’dbettercomebackandsitdown；you’llonlygetintotrouble。’
ButtheToadwasoff，andtherewasnoholdinghim。Hemarchedrapidlydowntheroad，hisstickoverhisshoulder，fumingandmutteringtohimselfinhisanger，tillhegotnearhisfrontgate，whensuddenlytherepoppedupfrombehindthepalingsalongyellowferretwithagun。
`Whocomesthere？’saidtheferretsharply。
`Stuffandnonsense！’saidToad，veryangrily。`Whatdoyoumeanbytalkinglikethattome？Comeoutofthatatonce，orI’ll————’
Theferretsaidneveraword，buthebroughthisgunuptohisshoulder。Toadprudentlydroppedflatintheroad，andBANG！abulletwhistledoverhishead。
ThestartledToadscrambledtohisfeetandscamperedoffdowntheroadashardashecould；andasheranheheardtheferretlaughingandotherhorridthinlittlelaughstakingitupandcarryingonthesound。
Hewentback，verycrestfallen，andtoldtheWaterRat。
`WhatdidItellyou？’saidtheRat。`It’snogood。They’vegotsentriesposted，andtheyareallarmed。Youmustjustwait。’
Still，Toadwasnotinclinedtogiveinallatonce。Sohegotouttheboat，andsetoffrowinguptherivertowherethegardenfrontofToadHallcamedowntothewaterside。
Arrivingwithinsightofhisoldhome，herestedonhisoarsandsurveyedthelandcautiously。Allseemedverypeacefulanddesertedandquiet。HecouldseethewholefrontofToadHall，glowingintheeveningsunshine，thepigeonssettlingbytwosandthreesalongthestraightlineoftheroof；thegarden，ablazeofflowers；thecreekthatleduptotheboat-house，thelittlewoodenbridgethatcrossedit；alltranquil，uninhabited，apparentlywaitingforhisreturn。Hewouldtrytheboat-housefirst，hethought。Verywarilyhepaddleduptothemouthofthecreek，andwasjustpassingunderthebridge，when……CRASH！
Agreatstone，droppedfromabove，smashedthroughthebottomoftheboat。Itfilledandsank，andToadfoundhimselfstrugglingindeepwater。Lookingup，hesawtwostoatsleaningovertheparapetofthebridgeandwatchinghimwithgreatglee。`Itwillbeyourheadnexttime，Toady！’theycalledouttohim。TheindignantToadswamtoshore，whilethestoatslaughedandlaughed，supportingeachother，andlaughedagain，tilltheynearlyhadtwofits——thatis，onefiteach，ofcourse。
TheToadretracedhiswearywayonfoot，andrelatedhisdisappointingexperiencestotheWaterRatoncemore。
`Well，WHATdidItellyou？’saidtheRatverycrossly。`And，now，lookhere！Seewhatyou’vebeenanddone！LostmemyboatthatIwassofondof，that’swhatyou’vedone！AndsimplyruinedthatnicesuitofclothesthatIlentyou！Really，Toad，ofallthetryinganimals——Iwonderyoumanagetokeepanyfriendsatall！’
TheToadsawatoncehowwronglyandfoolishlyhehadacted。Headmittedhiserrorsandwrong-headednessandmadeafullapologytoRatforlosinghisboatandspoilinghisclothes。Andhewoundupbysaying，withthatfrankself-surrenderwhichalwaysdisarmedhisfriend’scriticismandwonthembacktohisside，`Ratty！IseethatIhavebeenaheadstrongandawilfulToad！
Henceforth，believeme，Iwillbehumbleandsubmissive，andwilltakenoactionwithoutyourkindadviceandfullapproval！’
`Ifthatisreallyso，’saidthegood-naturedRat，alreadyappeased，`thenmyadvicetoyouis，consideringthelatenessofthehour，tositdownandhaveyoursupper，whichwillbeonthetableinaminute，andbeverypatient。ForIamconvincedthatwecandonothinguntilwehaveseentheMoleandtheBadger，andheardtheirlatestnews，andheldconferenceandtakentheiradviceinthisdifficultmatter。’
`Oh，ah，yes，ofcourse，theMoleandtheBadger，’saidToad，lightly。`What’sbecomeofthem，thedearfellows？Ihadforgottenallaboutthem。’
`Wellmayyouask！’saidtheRatreproachfully。`Whileyouwereridingaboutthecountryinexpensivemotor-cars，andgallopingproudlyonblood-horses，andbreakfastingonthefatoftheland，thosetwopoordevotedanimalshavebeencampingoutintheopen，ineverysortofweather，livingveryroughbydayandlyingveryhardbynight；watchingoveryourhouse，patrollingyourboundaries，keepingaconstanteyeonthestoatsandtheweasels，schemingandplanningandcontrivinghowtogetyourpropertybackforyou。Youdon’tdeservetohavesuchtrueandloyalfriends，Toad，youdon’t，really。Someday，whenit’stoolate，you’llbesorryyoudidn’tvaluethemmorewhileyouhadthem！’
`I’manungratefulbeast，Iknow，’sobbedToad，sheddingbittertears。`Letmegooutandfindthem，outintothecold，darknight，andsharetheirhardships，andtryandproveby————Holdonabit！SurelyIheardthechinkofdishesonatray！Supper’shereatlast，hooray！Comeon，Ratty！’
TheRatrememberedthatpoorToadhadbeenonprisonfareforaconsiderabletime，andthatlargeallowanceshadthereforetobemade。Hefollowedhimtothetableaccordingly，andhospitablyencouragedhiminhisgallanteffortstomakeupforpastprivations。
Theyhadjustfinishedtheirmealandresumedtheirarm-chairs，whentherecameaheavyknockatthedoor。
Toadwasnervous，buttheRat，noddingmysteriouslyathim，wentstraightuptothedoorandopenedit，andinwalkedMr。Badger。
Hehadalltheappearanceofonewhoforsomenightshadbeenkeptawayfromhomeandallitslittlecomfortsandconveniences。
Hisshoeswerecoveredwithmud，andhewaslookingveryroughandtouzled；butthenhehadneverbeenaverysmartman，theBadger，atthebestoftimes。HecamesolemnlyuptoToad，shookhimbythepaw，andsaid，`Welcomehome，Toad！Alas！whatamI
saying？Home，indeed！Thisisapoorhome-coming。UnhappyToad！’Thenheturnedhisbackonhim，satdowntothetable，drewhischairup，andhelpedhimselftoalargesliceofcoldpie。
Toadwasquitealarmedatthisveryseriousandportentousstyleofgreeting；buttheRatwhisperedtohim，`Nevermind；
don’ttakeanynotice；anddon’tsayanythingtohimjustyet。
He’salwaysratherlowanddespondentwhenhe’swantinghisvictuals。Inhalfanhour’stimehe’llbequiteadifferentanimal。’
Sotheywaitedinsilence，andpresentlytherecameanotherandalighterknock。TheRat，withanodtoToad，wenttothedoorandusheredintheMole，veryshabbyandunwashed，withbitsofhayandstrawstickinginhisfur。
`Hooray！Here’soldToad！’criedtheMole，hisfacebeaming。
`Fancyhavingyoubackagain！’Andhebegantodanceroundhim。
`Weneverdreamtyouwouldturnupsosoon！Why，youmusthavemanagedtoescape，youclever，ingenious，intelligentToad！’
TheRat，alarmed，pulledhimbytheelbow；butitwastoolate。
Toadwaspuffingandswellingalready。
`Clever？O，no！’hesaid。`I’mnotreallyclever，accordingtomyfriends。I’veonlybrokenoutofthestrongestprisoninEngland，that’sall！Andcapturedarailwaytrainandescapedonit，that’sall！Anddisguisedmyselfandgoneaboutthecountryhumbuggingeverybody，that’sall！O，no！I’mastupidass，Iam！I’lltellyouoneortwoofmylittleadventures，Mole，andyoushalljudgeforyourself！’
`Well，well，’saidtheMole，movingtowardsthesupper-table；
`supposingyoutalkwhileIeat。Notabitesincebreakfast！O
my！Omy！’Andhesatdownandhelpedhimselfliberallytocoldbeefandpickles。
Toadstraddledonthehearth-rug，thrusthispawintohistrouser-pocketandpulledoutahandfulofsilver。`Lookatthat！’hecried，displayingit。`That’snotsobad，isit，forafewminutes’work？AndhowdoyouthinkIdoneit，Mole？Horse-
dealing！That’showIdoneit！’
`Goon，Toad，’saidtheMole，immenselyinterested。
`Toad，dobequiet，please！’saidtheRat。`Anddon’tyouegghimon，Mole，whenyouknowwhatheis；butpleasetellusassoonaspossiblewhatthepositionis，andwhat’sbesttobedone，nowthatToadisbackatlast。’
`Theposition’saboutasbadasitcanbe，’repliedtheMolegrumpily；`andasforwhat’stobedone，why，blestifIknow！
TheBadgerandIhavebeenroundandroundtheplace，bynightandbyday；alwaysthesamething。Sentriespostedeverywhere，gunspokedoutatus，stonesthrownatus；alwaysananimalonthelook-out，andwhentheyseeus，my！howtheydolaugh！That’swhatannoysmemost！’
`It’saverydifficultsituation，’saidtheRat，reflectingdeeply。`ButIthinkIseenow，inthedepthsofmymind，whatToadreallyoughttodo。Iwilltellyou。Heoughtto————’
`No，heoughtn’t！’shoutedtheMole，withhismouthfull。
`Nothingofthesort！Youdon’tunderstand。Whatheoughttodois，heoughtto————’
`Well，Ishan’tdoit，anyway！’criedToad，gettingexcited。
`I’mnotgoingtobeorderedaboutbyyoufellows！It’smyhousewe’retalkingabout，andIknowexactlywhattodo，andI’lltellyou。I’mgoingto————’
Bythistimetheywereallthreetalkingatonce，atthetopoftheirvoices，andthenoisewassimplydeafening，whenathin，dryvoicemadeitselfheard，saying，`Bequietatonce，allofyou！’andinstantlyeveryonewassilent。
ItwastheBadger，who，havingfinishedhispie，hadturnedroundinhischairandwaslookingatthemseverely。Whenhesawthathehadsecuredtheirattention，andthattheywereevidentlywaitingforhimtoaddressthem，heturnedbacktothetableagainandreachedoutforthecheese。Andsogreatwastherespectcommandedbythesolidqualitiesofthatadmirableanimal，thatnotanotherwordwasuttereduntilhehadquitefinishedhisrepastandbrushedthecrumbsfromhisknees。TheToadfidgetedagooddeal，buttheRatheldhimfirmlydown。
WhentheBadgerhadquitedone，hegotupfromhisseatandstoodbeforethefireplace，reflectingdeeply。Atlasthespoke。
`Toad！’hesaidseverely。`Youbad，troublesomelittleanimal！
Aren’tyouashamedofyouself？Whatdoyouthinkyourfather，myoldfriend，wouldhavesaidifhehadbeenhereto-night，andhadknownofallyourgoingson？’
Toad，whowasonthesofabythistime，withhislegsup，rolledoveronhisface，shakenbysobsofcontrition。
`There，there！’wentontheBadger，morekindly。`Nevermind。
Stopcrying。We’regoingtoletbygonesbebygones，andtryandturnoveranewleaf。ButwhattheMolesaysisquitetrue。Thestoatsareonguard，ateverypoint，andtheymakethebestsentinelsintheworld。It’squiteuselesstothinkofattackingtheplace。They’retoostrongforus。’
`Thenit’sallover，’sobbedtheToad，cryingintothesofacushions。`Ishallgoandenlistforasoldier，andneverseemydearToadHallanymore！’
`Come，cheerup，Toady！’saidtheBadger。`Therearemorewaysofgettingbackaplacethantakingitbystorm。Ihaven’tsaidmylastwordyet。NowI’mgoingtotellyouagreatsecret。’
Toadsatupslowlyanddriedhiseyes。Secretshadanimmenseattractionforhim，becausehenevercouldkeepone，andheenjoyedthesortofunhallowedthrillheexperiencedwhenhewentandtoldanotheranimal，afterhavingfaithfullypromisednotto。
`There——is——an——underground——passage，’saidtheBadger，impressively，`thatleadsfromtheriver-bank，quitenearhere，rightupintothemiddleofToadHall。’
`O，nonsense！Badger，’saidToad，ratherairily。`You’vebeenlisteningtosomeoftheyarnstheyspininthepublic-housesabouthere。IknoweveryinchofToadHall，insideandout。
Nothingofthesort，Idoassureyou！’
`Myyoungfriend，’saidtheBadger，withgreatseverity，`yourfather，whowasaworthyanimal——alotworthierthansomeothersIknow——wasaparticularfriendofmine，andtoldmeagreatdealhewouldn’thavedreamtoftellingyou。Hediscoveredthatpassage——hedidn’tmakeit，ofcourse；thatwasdonehundredsofyearsbeforeheevercametolivethere——andherepaireditandcleaneditout，becausehethoughtitmightcomeinusefulsomeday，incaseoftroubleordanger；andheshowedittome。
\"Don’tletmysonknowaboutit，\"hesaid。\"He’sagoodboy，butverylightandvolatileincharacter，andsimplycannotholdhistongue。Ifhe’severinarealfix，anditwouldbeofusetohim，youmaytellhimaboutthesecretpassage；butnotbefore。\"’
TheotheranimalslookedhardatToadtoseehowhewouldtakeit。Toadwasinclinedtobesulkyatfirst；buthebrightenedupimmediately，likethegoodfellowhewas。
`Well，well，’hesaid；`perhapsIamabitofatalker。A
popularfellowsuchasIam——myfriendsgetroundme——wechaff，wesparkle，wetellwittystories——andsomehowmytonguegetswagging。Ihavethegiftofconversation。I’vebeentoldI
oughttohaveasalon，whateverthatmaybe。Nevermind。Goon，Badger。How’sthispassageofyoursgoingtohelpus？’
`I’vefoundoutathingortwolately，’continuedtheBadger。`I
gotOttertodisguisehimselfasasweepandcallattheback-
doorwithbrushesoverhisshoulder，askingforajob。There’sgoingtobeabigbanquetto-morrownight。It’ssomebody’sbirthday——theChiefWeasel’s，Ibelieve——andalltheweaselswillbegatheredtogetherinthedining-hall，eatinganddrinkingandlaughingandcarryingon，suspectingnothing。Noguns，noswords，nosticks，noarmsofanysortwhatever！’
`Butthesentinelswillbepostedasusual，’remarkedtheRat。
`Exactly，’saidtheBadger；`thatismypoint。Theweaselswilltrustentirelytotheirexcellentsentinels。Andthatiswherethepassagecomesin。Thatveryusefultunnelleadsrightupunderthebutler’spantry，nexttothedining-hall！’
`Aha！thatsqueakyboardinthebutler’spantry！’saidToad。
`NowIunderstandit！’
`Weshallcreepoutquietlyintothebutler’spantry——’criedtheMole。
`——withourpistolsandswordsandsticks——’shoutedtheRat。
`——andrushinuponthem，’saidtheBadger。
`——andwhack’em，andwhack’em，andwhack’em！’criedtheToadinecstasy，runningroundandroundtheroom，andjumpingoverthechairs`Verywell，then，’saidtheBadger，resuminghisusualdrymanner，`ourplanissettled，andthere’snothingmoreforyoutoargueandsquabbleabout。So，asit’sgettingverylate，allofyougorightofftobedatonce。Wewillmakeallthenecessaryarrangementsinthecourseofthemorningto-morrow。’
