第2章

TheywillnotletyouplaywithfireOrtripyoursisterupwithwire，Theygrudgethetea—trayforadrum，Orbooby—trapswhencallerscome。 Theydon’tlikefishing，andit’strueYousometimessoakasuitortwo： Theylookonfireworks，thoughthey’redry，Withquiteadisapprovingeye。 TheydonotunderstandthewayTogetthemostoutofyourday： TheydonotknowhowhungerfeelsNorwhatyouneedbetweenyourmeals。 Andwhenyou’resenttobedatnight，They’rehappy，butthey’renotpolite。 Forthroughthedooryouhearthemsay： ’He’sdonehismischieffortheday！’ ShetoldusalotofotherpiecesbutIcannotrememberthem，andshetalkedtousallthewayup，andwhenwegotnearlytoCannonStreetshesaid— ’I’vegottwonewshillingshere！DoyouthinktheywouldhelptosmooththepathtoFame？’ Noelsaid，’Thankyou，’andwasgoingtotaketheshilling。ButOswald，whoalwaysrememberswhatheistold，said— ’Thankyouverymuch，butFathertoldusweoughtnevertotakeanythingfromstrangers。’ ’That’sanastyone，’saidthelady—shedidn’ttalkabitlikeareallady，butmorelikeajollysortofgrown—upboyinadressandhat—’averynastyone！Butdon’tyouthinkasNoelandIarebothpoetsImightbeconsideredasortofrelation？You’veheardofbrotherpoets，haven’tyou？Don’tyouthinkNoElandIareauntandnephewpoets，orsomerelationshipofthatkind？’ Ididn’tknowwhattosay，andshewenton— ’It’sawfullystraightofyoutosticktowhatyourFathertellsyou，butlookhere，youtaketheshillings，andhere’smycard。 WhenyougethometellyourFatherallaboutit，andifhesaysNo，youcanjustbringtheshillingsbacktome。’ Sowetooktheshillings，andsheshookhandswithusandsaid，’Good—bye，andgoodhunting！’ WedidtellFatheraboutit，andhesaiditwasallright，andwhenhelookedatthecardhetolduswewerehighlyhonoured，fortheladywrotebetterpoetrythananyotherladyalivenow。Wehadneverheardofher，andsheseemedmuchtoojollyforapoet。GoodoldKipling！Weowehimthosetwoshillings，aswellasthejunglebooks！ CHAPTER5 THEPOETANDTHEEDITOR Itwasnotbadsport—beinginLondonentirelyonourownhook。 WeaskedthewaytoFleetStreet，whereFathersaysallthenewspaperofficesare。TheysaidstraightondownLudgateHill— butitturnedouttobequiteanotherway。Atleastwedidn’tgostraighton。 WegottoStPaul’s。NoelWOULDgoin，andwesawwhereGordonwasburied—atleastthemonument。Itisveryflat，consideringwhatamanhewas。 Whenwecameoutwewalkedalongway，andwhenweaskedapolicemanhesaidwe’dbettergobackthroughSmithfield。Sowedid。Theydon’tburnpeopleanymoretherenow，soitwasratherdull，besidesbeingalongway，andNoelgotverytired。He’sapeakylittlechap;itcomesofbeingapoet，Ithink。Wehadabunortwoatdifferentshops—outoftheshillings—anditwasquitelateintheafternoonwhenwegottoFleetStreet。Thegaswaslightedandtheelectriclights。ThereisajollyBovrilsignthatcomesoffandonindifferentcolouredlamps。WewenttotheDailyRecorderoffice，andaskedtoseetheEditor。Itisabigoffice，verybright，withbrassandmahoganyandelectriclights。 TheytoldustheEditorwasn’tthere，butatanotheroffice。Sowewentdownadirtystreet，toaverydull—lookingplace。Therewasamanthereinside，inaglasscase，asifhewasamuseum，andhetoldustowritedownournamesandourbusiness。SoOswaldwrote— OSWALDBASTABLE。 NOELBASTABLE。 Businessveryprivateindeed。 Thenwewaitedonthestonestairs;itwasverydraughty。Andthemanintheglasscaselookedatusasifwewerethemuseuminsteadofhim。Wewaitedalongtime，andthenaboycamedownandsaid— ’TheEditorcan’tseeyou。Willyoupleasewriteyourbusiness？’ Andhelaughed。Iwantedtopunchhishead。 ButNoelsaid，’Yes，I’llwriteitifyou’llgivemeapenandink，andasheetofpaperandanenvelope。’ Theboysaidhe’dbetterwritebypost。ButNoelisabitpig—headed;it’shisworstfault。Sohesaid— ’No，I’llwriteitnow。’SoIbackedhimupbysaying— ’Lookatthepricepennystampsaresincethecoalstrike！’ Sotheboygrinned，andthemanintheglasscasegaveuspenandpaper，andNoelwrote。Oswaldwritesbetterthanhedoes;butNoelwoulddoit;andittookaverylongtime，andthenitwasinky。 DEARMREDITOR，Iwantyoutoprintmypoetryandpayforit，andIamafriendofMrsLeslie’s;sheisapoettoo。 Youraffectionatefriend，NOELBASTABLE。 Helickedtheenvelopeagooddeal，sothatthatboyshouldn’treaditgoingupstairs;andhewrote’Veryprivate’outside，andgavethelettertotheboy。Ithoughtitwasn’tanygood;butinaminutethegrinningboycameback，andhewasquiterespectful，andsaid—’TheEditorsays，pleasewillyoustepup？’ Westeppedup。Therewerealotofstairsandpassages，andaqueersortofhumming，hammeringsoundandaveryfunnysmell。Theboywasnowverypolite，andsaiditwastheinkwesmelt，andthenoisewastheprintingmachines。 Aftergoingthroughalotofcoldpassageswecametoadoor;theboyopenedit，andletusgoin。Therewasalargeroom，withabig，soft，blue—and—redcarpet，andaroaringfire，thoughitwasonlyOctober;andalargetablewithdrawers，andlitteredwithpapers，justliketheoneinFather’sstudy。Agentlemanwassittingatonesideofthetable;hehadalightmoustacheandlighteyes，andhelookedveryyoungtobeaneditor—notnearlysooldasFather。Helookedverytiredandsleepy，asifhehadgotupveryearlyinthemorning;buthewaskind，andwelikedhim。Oswaldthoughthelookedclever。Oswaldisconsideredajudgeoffaces。 ’Well，’saidhe，’soyouareMrsLeslie’sfriends？’ ’Ithinkso，’saidNoel;’atleastshegaveuseachashilling，andshewishedus\"goodhunting！\"’ ’Goodhunting，eh？Well，whataboutthispoetryofyours？Whichisthepoet？’ Ican’tthinkhowhecouldhaveasked！Oswaldissaidtobeaverymanly—lookingboyforhisage。However，Ithoughtitwouldlookduffingtobeoffended，soIsaid— ’ThisismybrotherNoel。Heisthepoet。’Noelhadturnedquitepale。Heisdisgustinglylikeagirlinsomeways。TheEditortoldustositdown，andhetookthepoemsfromNoel，andbegantoreadthem。Noelgotpalerandpaler;Ireallythoughthewasgoingtofaint，likehedidwhenIheldhishandunderthecold—watertap，afterIhadaccidentallycuthimwithmychisel。WhentheEditorhadreadthefirstpoem—itwastheoneaboutthebeetle— hegotupandstoodwithhisbacktous。Itwasnotmanners;butNoelthinkshedidit’toconcealhisemotion，’astheydoinbooks。Hereadallthepoems，andthenhesaid— ’Ilikeyourpoetryverymuch，youngman。I’llgiveyou—letmesee;howmuchshallIgiveyouforit？’ ’Asmuchaseveryoucan，’saidNoel。’YouseeIwantagooddealofmoneytorestorethefallenfortunesofthehouseofBastable。’ Thegentlemanputonsomeeye—glassesandlookedhardatus。Thenhesatdown。 ’That’sagoodidea，’saidhe。’Tellmehowyoucametothinkofit。And，Isay，haveyouhadanytea？They’vejustsentoutformine。’ Herangatinglybell，andtheboybroughtinatraywithateapotandathickcupandsaucerandthings，andhehadtofetchanothertrayforus，whenhewastoldto;andwehadteawiththeEditoroftheDailyRecorder。IsupposeitwasaveryproudmomentforNoel，thoughIdidnotthinkofthattillafterwards。TheEditoraskedusalotofquestions，andwetoldhimagooddeal，thoughofcourseIdidnottellastrangerallourreasonsforthinkingthatthefamilyfortuneswantedrestoring。Westayedabouthalfanhour，andwhenweweregoingawayhesaidagain— ’Ishallprintallyourpoems，mypoet;andnowwhatdoyouthinkthey’reworth？’ ’Idon’tknow，’Noelsaid。’YouseeIdidn’twritethemtosell。’ ’Whydidyouwritethemthen？’heasked。 Noelsaidhedidn’tknow;hesupposedbecausehewantedto。 ’ArtforArt’ssake，eh？’saidtheEditor，andheseemedquitedelighted，asthoughNoelhadsaidsomethingclever。 ’Well，wouldaguineameetyourviews？’heasked。 Ihavereadofpeoplebeingatalossforwords，anddumbwithemotion，andI’vereadofpeoplebeingturnedtostonewithastonishment，orjoy，orsomething，butIneverknewhowsillyitlookedtillIsawNoelstandingstaringattheEditorwithhismouthopen。Hewentredandhewentwhite，andthenhegotcrimson，asifyouwererubbingmoreandmorecrimsonlakeonapalette。Buthedidn’tsayaword，soOswaldhadtosay—’I shouldjollywellthinkso。’ SotheEditorgaveNoelasovereignandashilling，andheshookhandswithusboth，buthethumpedNoelonthebackandsaid— ’Buckup，oldman！It’syourfirstguinea，butitwon’tbeyourlast。Nowgoalonghome，andinabouttenyearsyoucanbringmesomemorepoetry。Notbefore—see？I’mjusttakingthispoetryofyoursbecauseIlikeitverymuch;butwedon’tputpoetryinthispaperatall。IshallhavetoputitinanotherpaperIknowof。’ ’Whatdoyouputinyourpaper？’Iasked，forFatheralwaystakestheDailyChronicle，andIdidn’tknowwhattheRecorderwaslike。 Wechoseitbecauseithassuchagloriousoffice，andaclockoutsidelightedup。 ’Oh，news，’saidhe，’anddullarticles，andthingsaboutCelebrities。IfyouknowanyCelebrities，now？’ NoelaskedhimwhatCelebritieswere。 ’Oh，theQueenandthePrinces，andpeoplewithtitles，andpeoplewhowrite，orsing，oract—ordosomethingcleverorwicked。’ ’Idon’tknowanybodywicked，’saidOswald，wishinghehadknownDickTurpin，orClaudeDuval，soastobeabletotelltheEditorthingsaboutthem。’ButIknowsomeonewithatitle—LordTottenham。’ ’ThemadoldProtectionist，eh？Howdidyoucometoknowhim？’ ’Wedon’tknowhimtospeakto。ButhegoesovertheHeatheverydayatthree，andhestridesalonglikeagiant—withablackcloaklikeLordTennyson’sflyingbehindhim，andhetalkstohimselflikeoneo’clock。’ ’Whatdoeshesay？’TheEditorhadsatdownagain，andhewasfiddlingwithabluepencil。 ’Weonlyheardhimonce，closeenoughtounderstand，andthenhesaid，\"Thecurseofthecountry，sir—ruinanddesolation！\"Andthenhewentstridingalongagain，hittingatthefurze—bushesasiftheyweretheheadsofhisenemies。’ ’Excellentdescriptivetouch，’saidtheEditor。’Well，goon。’ ’That’sallIknowabouthim，exceptthathestopsinthemiddleoftheHeatheveryday，andhelooksallroundtoseeifthere’sanyoneabout，andifthereisn’t，hetakeshiscollaroff。’ TheEditorinterrupted—whichisconsideredrude—andsaid— ’You’renotromancing？’ ’Ibegyourpardon？’saidOswald。 ’Drawingthelongbow，Imean，’saidtheEditor。 Oswalddrewhimselfup，andsaidhewasn’taliar。 TheEditoronlylaughed，andsaidromancingandlyingwerenotatallthesame;onlyitwasimportanttoknowwhatyouwereplayingat。SoOswaldacceptedhisapology，andwenton。 ’Wewerehidingamongthefurze—bushesoneday，andwesawhimdoit。Hetookoffhiscollar，andheputonacleanone，andhethrewtheotheramongthefurze—bushes。Wepickeditupafterwards，anditwasabeastlypaperone！’ ’Thankyou，’saidtheEditor，andhegotupandputhishandinhispocket。’That’swellworthfiveshillings，andtheretheyare。 Wouldyouliketoseeroundtheprintingofficesbeforeyougohome？’ Ipocketedmyfivebob，andthankedhim，andIsaidweshouldlikeitverymuch。Hecalledanothergentlemanandsaidsomethingwecouldn’thear。Thenhesaidgood—byeagain;andallthistimeNoelhadn’tsaidaword。Butnowhesaid，’I’vemadeapoemaboutyou。 Itiscalled\"LinestoaNobleEditor。\"ShallIwriteitdown？’ TheEditorgavehimthebluepencil，andhesatdownattheEditor’stableandwrote。Itwasthis，hetoldmeafterwardsaswellashecouldremember— MayLife’schoicestblessingsbeyourlotIthinkyououghttobeveryblestForyouaregoingtoprintmypoems— Andyoumayhavethisoneaswellastherest。 ’Thankyou，’saidtheEditor。’Idon’tthinkIeverhadapoemaddressedtomebefore。Ishalltreasureit，Iassureyou。’ ThentheothergentlemansaidsomethingaboutMaecenas，andwewentofftoseetheprintingofficewithatleastonepoundseveninourpockets。 Itwasgoodhunting，andnomistake！ ButheneverputNoel’spoetryintheDailyRecorder。Itwasquitealongtimeafterwardswesawasortofstorythinginamagazine，onthestationbookstall，andthatkind，sleepy—lookingEditorhadwrittenit，Isuppose。Itwasnotatallamusing。ItsaidalotaboutNoelandme，describingusallwrong，andsayinghowwehadteawiththeEditor;andallNoel’spoemswereinthestorything。 IthinkmyselftheEditorseemedtomakegameofthem，butNoelwasquitepleasedtoseethemprinted—sothat’sallright。Itwasn’tmypoetryanyhow，Iamgladtosay。 CHAPTER6 NOEL’SPRINCESS Shehappenedquiteaccidentally。WewerenotlookingforaPrincessatalljustthen;butNoelhadsaidhewasgoingtofindaPrincessallbyhimself;andmarryher—andhereallydid。 Whichwasratherodd，becausewhenpeoplesaythingsaregoingtobefall，veryoftentheydon’t。Itwasdifferent，ofcourse，withtheprophetsofold。 Wedidnotgetanytreasurebyit，excepttwelvechocolatedrops; butwemighthavedone，anditwasanadventure，anyhow。 GreenwichParkisajollygoodplacetoplayin，especiallythepartsthataren’tnearGreenwich。ThepartsneartheHeatharefirst—rate。IoftenwishtheParkwasnearerourhouse;butI supposeaParkisadifficultthingtomove。 SometimeswegetElizatoputlunchinabasket，andwegouptothePark。Shelikesthat—itsavescookingdinnerforus;andsometimesshesaysofherownaccord，’I’vemadesomepastiesforyou，andyoumightaswellgointotheParkasnot。It’salovelyday。’ Shealwaystellsustorinseoutthecupatthedrinking—fountain，andthegirlsdo;butIalwaysputmyheadunderthetapanddrink。 Thenyouareanintrepidhunteratamountainstream—andbesides，you’resureit’sclean。Dickydoesthesame，andsodoesH。O。ButNoelalwaysdrinksoutofthecup。Hesaysitisagoldengobletwroughtbyenchantedgnomes。 ThedaythePrincesshappenedwasafine，hotday，lastOctober，andwewerequitetiredwiththewalkuptothePark。 WealwaysgoinbythelittlegateatthetopofCroom’sHill。Itistheposterngatethatthingsalwayshappenatinstories。Itwasdustywalking，butwhenwegotintheParkitwasripping，sowerestedabit，andlayonourbacks，andlookedupatthetrees，andwishedwecouldplaymonkeys。Ihavedoneitbeforenow，butthePark—keepermakesarowifhecatchesyou。Whenwe’drestedalittle，Alicesaid— ’Itwasalongwaytotheenchantedwood，butitisverynicenowwearethere。Iwonderwhatweshallfindinit？’ ’Weshallfinddeer，’saidDicky，’ifwegotolook;buttheygoontheothersideoftheParkbecauseofthepeoplewithbuns。’ Sayingbunsmadeusthinkoflunch，sowehadit;andwhenwehaddonewescratchedaholeunderatreeandburiedthepapers，becauseweknowitspoilsprettyplacestoleavebeastly，greasypaperslyingabout。IrememberMotherteachingmeandDorathat，whenwewerequitelittle。Iwisheverybody’sparentswouldteachthemthisusefullesson，andthesameaboutorangepeel。 Whenwe’deateneverythingtherewas，Alicewhispered— ’Iseethewhitewitchbearyonderamongthetrees！Let’strackitandslayitinitslair。’ ’Iamthebear，’saidNoEl;sohecreptaway，andwefollowedhimamongthetrees。Oftenthewitchbearwasoutofsight，andthenyoudidn’tknowwhereitwouldjumpoutfrom;butsometimeswesawit，andjustfollowed。 ’Whenwecatchitthere’llbeagreatfight，’saidOswald;’andI shallbeCountFolkoofMontFaucon。’ ’I’llbeGabrielle，’saidDora。Sheistheonlyoneofuswholikesdoinggirl’sparts。 ’I’llbeSintram，’saidAlice;’andH。O。canbetheLittleMaster。’ ’WhataboutDicky？’ ’Oh，IcanbethePilgrimwiththebones。’ ’Hist！’whisperedAlice。’Seehiswhitefairyfurgleamingamidyondercovert！’ AndIsawabitofwhitetoo。ItwasNoel’scollar，andithadcomeundoneattheback。 Wehuntedthebearinandoutofthetrees，andthenwelosthimaltogether;andsuddenlywefoundthewallofthePark—inaplacewhereI’msuretherewasn’tawallbefore。Noelwasn’tanywhereabout，andtherewasadoorinthewall。Anditwasopen;sowewentthrough。 ’Thebearhashiddenhimselfinthesemountainfastnesses，’Oswaldsaid。’Iwilldrawmygoodswordandafterhim。’ SoIdrewtheumbrella，whichDoraalwayswillbringincaseitrains，becauseNoelgetsacoldonthechestattheleastthing— andwewenton。 Theothersideofthewallitwasastableyard，allcobble—stones。 Therewasnobodyabout—butwecouldhearamanrubbingdownahorseandhissinginthestable;sowecreptveryquietlypast，andAlicewhispered— ’’TisthelairoftheMonsterSerpent;Ihearhisdeadlyhiss！ Beware！Courageanddespatch！’ Wewentoverthestonesontiptoe，andwefoundanotherwallwithanotherdoorinitontheotherside。Wewentthroughthattoo，ontiptoe。Itreallywasanadventure。Andtherewewereinashrubbery，andwesawsomethingwhitethroughthetrees。Dorasaiditwasthewhitebear。ThatissolikeDora。Shealwaysbeginstotakepartinaplayjustwhentherestofusaregettingtiredofit。Idon’tmeanthisunkindly，becauseIamveryfondofDora。 IcannotforgethowkindshewaswhenIhadbronchitis;andingratitudeisadreadfulvice。Butitisquitetrue。 ’Itisnotabear，’saidOswald;andweallwenton，stillontiptoe，roundatwistypathandontoalawn，andtherewasNoel。 Hiscollarhadcomeundone，asIsaid，andhehadaninkymarkonhisfacethathemadejustbeforeweleftthehouse，andhewouldn’tletDorawashitoff，andoneofhisbootlaceswascomingdown。Hewasstandinglookingatalittlegirl;shewasthefunniestlittlegirlyoueversaw。 Shewaslikeachinadoll—thesixpennykind;shehadawhiteface，andlongyellowhair，doneupverytightintwopigtails;herforeheadwasverybigandlumpy，andhercheekscamehighup，likelittleshelvesunderhereyes。Hereyesweresmallandblue。Shehadonafunnyblackfrock，withcurlybraidonit，andbuttonbootsthatwentalmostuptoherknees。Herlegswereverythin。 Shewassittinginahammockchairnursingabluekitten—notasky—blueone，ofcourse，butthecolourofanewslatepencil。AswecameupweheardhersaytoNoel—’Whoareyou？’ Noelhadforgottenaboutthebear，andhewastakinghisfavouritepart，sohesaid—’I’mPrinceCamaralzaman。’Thefunnylittlegirllookedpleased。 ’Ithoughtatfirstyouwereacommonboy，’shesaid。Thenshesawtherestofusandsaid—’AreyouallPrincessesandPrincestoo？’ Ofcoursewesaid’Yes，’andshesaid—’IamaPrincessalso。’ Shesaiditverywelltoo，exactlyasifitweretrue。Wewereveryglad，becauseitissoseldomyoumeetanychildrenwhocanbegintoplayrightoffwithouthavingeverythingexplainedtothem。Andeventhentheywillsaytheyaregoingto’pretendtobe’alion，orawitch，oraking。Nowthislittlegirljustsaid’IamaPrincess。’ThenshelookedatOswaldandsaid，’IfancyI’veseenyouatBaden。’OfcourseOswaldsaid，’Verylikely。’ Thelittlegirlhadafunnyvoice，andallherwordswerequiteplain，eachwordbyitself;shedidn’ttalkatalllikewedo。 H。O。askedherwhatthecat’snamewas，andshesaid’Katinka。’ ThenDickysaid— ’Let’sgetawayfromthewindows;ifyouplaynearwindowssomeoneinsidegenerallyknocksatthemandsays\"Don’t\"。’ ThePrincessputdownthecatverycarefullyandsaid— ’Iamforbiddentowalkoffthegrass。’ ’That’sapity，’saidDora。 ’ButIwillifyoulike，’saidthePrincess。 ’Youmustn’tdothingsyouareforbiddentodo，’Dorasaid;butDickyshowedusthattherewassomemoregrassbeyondtheshrubswithonlyagravelpathbetween。SoIliftedthePrincessoverthegravel，sothatsheshouldbeabletosayshehadn’twalkedoffthegrass。Whenwegottotheothergrassweallsatdown，andthePrincessaskedusifweliked’dragees’（Iknowthat’showyouspellit，forIaskedAlbert—next—door’suncle）。 Wesaidwethoughtnot，butshepulledarealsilverboxoutofherpocketandshowedus;theywerejustflat，roundchocolates。Wehadtwoeach。Thenweaskedherhername，andshebegan，andwhenshebeganshewenton，andon，andon，tillIthoughtshewasnevergoingtostop。H。O。saidshehadfiftynames，butDickyisverygoodatfigures，andhesaystherewereonlyeighteen。ThefirstwerePauline，Alexandra，Alice，andMarywasone，andVictoria，forweallheardthat，anditendedupwithHildegardeCunigondesomethingorother，Princessofsomethingelse。 Whenshe’ddone，H。O。said，’That’sjollygood！Sayitagain！’ andshedid，buteventhenwecouldn’trememberit。Wetoldherournames，butshethoughttheyweretooshort，sowhenitwasNoel’sturnhesaidhewasPrinceNoelCamaralzamanIvanConstantineCharlemagneJamesJohnEdwardBiggsMaximilianBastablePrinceofLewisham，butwhensheaskedhimtosayitagainofcoursehecouldonlygetthefirsttwonamesright，becausehe’dmadeitupashewenton。 SothePrincesssaid，’Youarequiteoldenoughtoknowyourownname。’Shewasverygraveandserious。 ShetoldusthatshewasthefifthcousinofQueenVictoria。Weaskedwhotheothercousinswere，butshedidnotseemtounderstand。Shewentonandsaidshewasseventimesremoved。Shecouldn’ttelluswhatthatmeanteither，butOswaldthinksitmeansthattheQueen’scousinsaresofondofherthattheywillkeepcomingbothering，sotheQueen’sservantshaveorderstoremovethem。ThislittlegirlmusthavebeenveryfondoftheQueentotrysooftentoseeher，andtohavebeenseventimesremoved。Wecouldseethatitisconsideredsomethingtobeproudof;butwethoughtitwashardontheQueenthathercousinswouldn’tletheralone。 Presentlythelittlegirlaskeduswhereourmaidsandgovernesseswere。 Wetoldherwehadn’tanyjustnow。Andshesaid— ’Howpleasant！Anddidyoucomeherealone？’ ’Yes，’saidDora;’wecameacrosstheHeath。’ ’Youareveryfortunate，’saidthelittlegirl。Shesatveryuprightonthegrass，withherfatlittlehandsinherlap。’I shouldliketogoontheHeath。Therearedonkeysthere，withwhitesaddlecovers。Ishouldliketoridethem，butmygovernesswillnotpermit。’ ’I’mgladwehaven’tagoverness，’H。O。said。’Weridethedonkeyswheneverwehaveanypennies，andonceIgavethemananotherpennytomakeitgallop。’ ’Youareindeedfortunate！’saidthePrincessagain，andwhenshelookedsadtheshelvesonhercheeksshowedmorethanever。Youcouldhavelaidasixpenceonthemquitesafelyifyouhadhadone。 ’Nevermind，’saidNoel;’I’vegotalotofmoney。Comeoutandhavearidenow。’Butthelittlegirlshookherheadandsaidshewasafraiditwouldnotbecorrect。 Dorasaidshewasquiteright;thenallofasuddencameoneofthoseuncomfortabletimeswhennobodycanthinkofanythingtosay，sowesatandlookedateachother。ButatlastAlicesaidweoughttobegoing。 ’Donotgoyet，’thelittlegirlsaid。’Atwhattimedidtheyorderyourcarriage？’ ’Ourcarriageisafairyone，drawnbygriffins，anditcomeswhenwewishforit，’saidNoel。 Thelittlegirllookedathimveryqueerly，andsaid，’Thatisoutofapicture—book。’ ThenNoelsaidhethoughtitwasabouttimehewasmarriedifweweretobehomeintimefortea。Thelittlegirlwasratherstupidoverit，butshedidwhatwetoldher，andwemarriedthemwithDora’spocket—handkerchiefforaveil，andtheringoffthebackofoneofthebuttonsonH。O。’sblousejustwentonherlittlefinger。 Thenweshowedherhowtoplaycross—touch，andpussinthecorner，andtag。Itwasfunny，shedidn’tknowanygamesbutbattledoreandshuttlecockandlesgraces。Butshereallybegantolaughatlastandnottolookquitesolikeadoll。 ShewasPussandwasrunningafterDickywhensuddenlyshestoppedshortandlookedasifshewasgoingtocry。Andwelookedtoo，andthereweretwoprimladieswithlittlemouthsandtighthair。 Oneofthemsaidinquiteanawfulvoice，’Pauline，whoarethesechildren？’andhervoicewasgruff;withverycurlyR’s。 ThelittlegirlsaidwewerePrincesandPrincesses—whichwassilly，toagrown—uppersonthatisnotagreatfriendofyours。 Thegruffladygaveashort，horridlaugh，likeahuskybark，andsaid— ’Princes，indeed！They’reonlycommonchildren！’ Doraturnedveryredandbegantospeak，butthelittlegirlcriedout’Commonchildren！Oh，Iamsoglad！WhenIamgrownupI’llalwaysplaywithcommonchildren。’ Andsheranatus，andbegantokissusonebyone，beginningwithAlice;shehadgottoH。O。whenthehorridladysaid—’YourHighness—goindoorsatonce！’ Thelittlegirlanswered，’Iwon’t！’ Thentheprimladysaid—’Wilson，carryherHighnessindoors。’ Andthelittlegirlwascarriedawayscreaming，andkickingwithherlittlethinlegsandherbuttonedboots，andbetweenherscreamssheshrieked： ’Commonchildren！Iamglad，glad，glad！Commonchildren！Commonchildren！’ Thenastyladythenremarked—’Goatonce，orIwillsendforthepolice！’ Sowewent。H。O。madeafaceatherandsodidAlice，butOswaldtookoffhiscapandsaidhewassorryifshewasannoyedaboutanything;forOswaldhasalwaysbeentaughttobepolitetoladies，howevernasty。Dickytookhisoff，too，whenhesawmedoit;hesayshediditfirst，butthatisamistake。IfIwerereallyacommonboyIshouldsayitwasalie。 Thenweallcameaway，andwhenwegotoutsideDorasaid，’SoshewasreallyaPrincess。FancyaPrincesslivingthere！’ ’EvenPrincesseshavetolivesomewhere，’saidDicky。 ’AndIthoughtitwasplay。Anditwasreal。IwishI’dknown！ Ishouldhavelikedtoaskherlotsofthings，’saidAlice。 H。O。saidhewouldhavelikedtoaskherwhatshehadfordinnerandwhethershehadacrown。 Ifelt，myself，wehadlostachanceoffindingoutagreatdealaboutkingsandqueens。Imighthaveknownsuchastupid—lookinglittlegirlwouldneverhavebeenabletopretend，aswellasthat。 SoweallwenthomeacrosstheHeath，andmadedrippingtoastfortea。 WhenwewereeatingitNoelsaid，’IwishIcouldgivehersome！ Itisverygood。’ Hesighedashesaidit，andhismouthwasveryfull，soweknewhewasthinkingofhisPrincess。Hesaysnowthatshewasasbeautifulastheday，butwerememberherquitewell，andshewasnothingofthekind。 CHAPTER7 BEINGBANDITS NoelwasquitetiresomeforeversolongafterwefoundthePrincess。HewouldkeeponwantingtogototheParkwhentherestofusdidn’t，andthoughwewentseveraltimestopleasehim，weneverfoundthatdooropenagain，andallofusexcepthimknewfromthefirstthatitwouldbenogo。 Sonowwethoughtitwastimetodosomethingtorousehimfromthestuporofdespair，whichisalwaysdonetoheroeswhenanythingbafflinghasoccurred。Besides，weweregettingveryshortofmoneyagain—thefortunesofyourhousecannotberestored（notsothattheywilllast，thatis），evenbytheonepoundeightwegotwhenwehadthe’goodhunting。’WespentagooddealofthatonpresentsforFather’sbirthday。Wegothimapaper—weight，likeaglassbun，withapictureofLewishamChurchatthebottom;andablotting—pad，andaboxofpreservedfruits，andanivorypenholderwithaviewofGreenwichParkinthelittleholewhereyoulookthroughatthetop。Hewasmostawfullypleasedandsurprised，andwhenheheardhowNoelandOswaldhadearnedthemoneytobuythethingshewasmoresurprisedstill。NearlyalltherestofourmoneywenttogetfireworksfortheFifthofNovember。WegotsixCatherinewheelsandfourrockets;twohand—lights，oneredandonegreen;asixpennymaroon;twoRoman—candles—theycostashilling; someItalianstreamers，afairyfountain，andatourbillonthatcosteighteen—penceandwasverynearlyworthit。 ButIthinkcrackersandsquibsareamistake。It’strueyougetalotofthemforthemoney，andtheyarenotbadfunforthefirsttwoorthreedozen，butyougetjollysickofthembeforeyou’veletoffyoursixpenn’orth。Andtheonlyamusingwayisnotallowed：itisputtingtheminthefire。 Italwaysseemsalongtimetilltheeveningwhenyouhavegotfireworksinthehouse，andIthinkasitwasaratherfoggydayweshouldhavedecidedtoletthemoffdirectlyafterbreakfast，onlyFatherhadsaidhewouldhelpustoletthemoffateighto’clockafterhehadhadhisdinner，andyououghtnevertodisappointyourfatherifyoucanhelpit。 YouseewehadthreegoodreasonsfortryingH。O。’sideaofrestoringthefallenfortunesofourhousebybecomingbanditsontheFifthofNovember。Wehadafourthreasonaswell，andthatwasthebestreasonofthelot。YourememberDorathoughtitwouldbewrongtobebandits。AndtheFifthofNovembercamewhileDorawasawayatStroudstayingwithhergodmother。StroudisinGloucestershire。Weweredeterminedtodoitwhileshewasoutoftheway，becausewedidnotthinkitwrong，andbesideswemeanttodoitanyhow。 WeheldaCouncil，ofcourse，andlaidourplansverycarefully。 WeletH。O。beCaptain，becauseitwashisidea。OswaldwasLieutenant。Oswaldwasquitefair，becauseheletH。O。callhimselfCaptain;butOswaldistheeldestnexttoDora，afterall。 Ourplanwasthis。WewerealltogoupontotheHeath。OurhouseisintheLewishamRoad，butit’squiteclosetotheHeathifyoucutuptheshortwayoppositetheconfectioner’s，pastthenurserygardensandthecottagehospital，andturntotheleftagainandafterwardstotheright。Youcomeoutthenatthetopofthehill，wherethebiggunsarewiththeironfenceroundthem，andwherethebandsplayonThursdayeveningsinthesummer。 Weweretolurkinambushthere，andwaylayanunwarytraveller。 Weweretocalluponhimtosurrenderhisarms，andthenbringhimhomeandputhiminthedeepestdungeonbelowthecastlemoat;thenweweretoloadhimwithchainsandsendtohisfriendsforransom。 Youmaythinkwehadnochains，butyouarewrong，becauseweusedtokeeptwootherdogsonce，besidesPincher，beforethefallofthefortunesoftheancientHouseofBastable。Andtheywerequitebigdogs。 Itwaslatishintheafternoonbeforewestarted。Wethoughtwecouldlurkbetterifitwasnearlydark。Itwasratherfoggy，andwewaitedagoodwhilebesidetherailings，butallthebelatedtravellerswereeithergrownuporelsetheywereBoardSchoolchildren。Weweren’tgoingtogetintoarowwithgrown—uppeople—especiallystrangers—andnotruebanditwouldeverstooptoaskaransomfromtherelationsofthepoorandneedy。Sowethoughtitbettertowait。 AsIsaid，itwasGuyFawkesDay，andifithadnotbeenweshouldneverhavebeenabletobebanditsatall，fortheunwarytravellerwedidcatchhadbeenforbiddentogooutbecausehehadacoldinhishead。Buthewouldrunouttofollowaguy，withoutevenputtingonacoatoracomforter，anditwasaverydamp，foggyafternoonandnearlydark，soyouseeitwashisownfaultentirely，andservedhimjollywellright。 WesawhimcomingovertheHeathjustasweweredecidingtogohometotea。Hehadfollowedthatguyrightacrosstothevillage（wecallBlackheaththevillage;Idon’tknowwhy），andhewascomingbackdragginghisfeetandsniffing。 ’Hist，anunwarytravellerapproaches！’whisperedOswald。 ’Muffleyourhorses’headsandseetotheprimingofyourpistols，’ mutteredAlice。Shealwayswillplayboys’parts，andshemakesElliscutherhairshortonpurpose。Ellisisaveryobliginghairdresser。 ’Stealsoftlyuponhim，’saidNoel;’forlo！’tisdusk，andnohumaneyescanmarkourdeeds。’Soweranoutandsurroundedtheunwarytraveller。itturnedouttobeAlbert—next—door，andhewasveryfrightenedindeeduntilhesawwhowewere。 ’Surrender！’hissedOswald，inadesperate—soundingvoice，ashecaughtthearmoftheUnwary。AndAlbert—next—doorsaid，’Allright！I’msurrenderingashardasIcan。Youneedn’tpullmyarmoff。’ Weexplainedtohimthatresistancewasuseless，andIthinkhesawthatfromthefirst。Weheldhimtightbybotharms，andwemarchedhimhomedownthehillinahollowsquareoffive。 Hewantedtotellusabouttheguy，butwemadehimseethatitwasnotproperforprisonerstotalktotheguard，especiallyaboutguysthattheprisonerhadbeentoldnottogoafterbecauseofhiscold。 Whenwegottowherewelivehesaid，’Allright，Idon’twanttotellyou。You’llwishIhadafterwards。Youneversawsuchaguy。’ ’Icanseeyou！’saidH。O。Itwasveryrude，andOswaldtoldhimsoatonce，becauseitishisdutyasanelderbrother。ButH。O。 isveryyounganddoesnotknowbetteryet，andbesidesitwasn’tbadforH。O。 Albert—next—doorsaid，’Youhaven’tanymanners，andIwanttogointomytea。Letgoofme！’ ButAlicetoldhim，quitekindly，thathewasnotgoingintohistea，butcomingwithus。 ’I’mnot，’saidAlbert—next—door;’I’mgoinghome。Leavego！I’vegotabadcold。You’remakingitworse。’Thenhetriedtocough，whichwasverysilly，becausewe’dseenhiminthemorning，andhe’dtolduswherethecoldwasthathewasn’ttogooutwith。 Whenhehadtriedtocough，hesaid，’Leavegoofme！Youseemycold’sgettingworse。’ ’Youshouldhavethoughtofthatbefore，’saidDicky;’you’recominginwithus。’ ’Don’tbeasilly，’saidNoel;’youknowwetoldyouattheverybeginningthatresistancewasuseless。Thereisnodisgraceinyielding。Wearefivetoyourone。’ BythistimeElizahadopenedthedoor，andwethoughtitbesttotakehiminwithoutanymoreparlaying。Toparleywithaprisonerisnotdonebybandits。 Directlywegothimsafeintothenursery，H。O。begantojumpaboutandsay，’Nowyou’reaprisonerreallyandtruly！’ AndAlbert—next—doorbegantocry。Healwaysdoes。Iwonderhedidn’tbeginlongbefore—butAlicefetchedhimoneofthedriedfruitswegaveFatherforhisbirthday。Itwasagreenwalnut。I havenoticedthewalnutsandtheplumsalwaysgetlefttillthelastinthebox;theapricotsgofirst，andthenthefigsandpears;andthecherries，ifthereareany。 Soheateitandshutup。Thenweexplainedhispositiontohim，sothatthereshouldbenomistake，andhecouldn’tsayafterwardsthathehadnotunderstood。 ’Therewillbenoviolence，’saidOswald—hewasnowCaptainoftheBandits，becauseweallknowH。O。likestobeChaplainwhenweplayprisoners—’noviolence。Butyouwillbeconfinedinadark，subterraneandungeonwheretoadsandsnakescrawl，andbutlittleofthelightofdayfiltersthroughtheheavilymullionedwindows。 Youwillbeloadedwithchains。Nowdon’tbeginagain，Baby，there’snothingtocryabout;strawwillbeyourpallet;besideyouthegaolerwillsetaewer—aewerisonlyajug，stupid;itwon’teatyou—aewerwithwater;andamoulderingcrustwillbeyourfood。’ ButAlbert—next—doorneverentersintothespiritofathing。Hemumbledsomethingabouttea—time。 NowOswald，thoughstern，isalwaysjust，andbesideswewereallratherhungry，andteawasready。Sowehaditatonce，Albert—next—doorandall—andwegavehimwhatwasleftofthefour—poundjarofapricotjamwegotwiththemoneyNoelgotforhispoetry。Andwesavedourcrustsfortheprisoner。 Albert—next—doorwasverytiresome。Nobodycouldhavehadanicerprisonthanhehad。Wefencedhimintoacornerwiththeoldwirenurseryfenderandallthechairs，insteadofputtinghiminthecoal—cellaraswehadfirstintended。Andwhenhesaidthedog—chainswerecoldthegirlswerekindenoughtowarmhisfettersthoroughlyatthefirebeforeweputthemonhim。 WegotthestrawcasesofsomebottlesofwinesomeonesentFatheroneChristmas—itissomeyearsago，butthecasesarequitegood。 Weunpickedthemverycarefullyandpulledthemtopiecesandscatteredthestrawabout。Itmadealovelystrawpallet，andtookeversolongtomake—butAlbert—next—doorhasyettolearnwhatgratitudereallyis。Wegotthebreadtrencherforthewoodenplatterwheretheprisoner’scrustswereput—theywerenotmouldy，butwecouldnotwaittilltheygotso，andfortheewerwegotthetoiletjugoutofthespare—roomwherenobodyeversleeps。 AndeventhenAlbert—next—doorcouldn’tbehappyliketherestofus。Hehowledandcriedandtriedtogetout，andheknockedtheeweroverandstampedonthemoulderingcrusts。Luckilytherewasnowaterintheewerbecausewehadforgottenit，onlydustandspiders。Sowetiedhimupwiththeclothes—linefromthebackkitchen，andwehadtohurryup，whichwasapityforhim。Wemighthavehadhimrescuedbyadevotedpageifhehadn’tbeensotiresome。InfactNoelwasactuallydressingupforthepagewhenAlbert—next—doorkickedovertheprisonewer。 Wegotasheetofpaperoutofanoldexercise—book，andwemadeH。 O。prickhisownthumb，becauseheisourlittlebrotheranditisourdutytoteachhimtobebrave。Wenoneofusmindprickingourselves;we’vedoneitheapsoftimes。H。O。didn’tlikeit，butheagreedtodoit，andIhelpedhimalittlebecausehewassoslow，andwhenhesawtheredbeadofbloodgettingfatterandbiggerasIsqueezedhisthumbhewasverypleased，justasIhadtoldhimhewouldbe。 ThisiswhatwewrotewithH。O。’sblood，onlythebloodgaveoutwhenwegotto’Restored’，andwehadtowritetherestwithcrimsonlake，whichisnotthesamecolour，thoughIalwaysuseit，myself，forpaintingwounds。 WhileOswaldwaswritingitheheardAlicewhisperingtotheprisonerthatitwouldsoonbeover，anditwasonlyplay。Theprisonerleftoffhowling，soIpretendednottohearwhatshesaid。ABanditCaptainhastooverlookthingssometimes。Thiswastheletter— ’AlbertMorrisonisheldaprisonerbyBandits。Onpaymentofthreethousandpoundshewillberestoredtohissorrowingrelatives，andallwillbeforgottenandforgiven。’ Iwasnotsureaboutthelastpart，butDickywascertainhehadseenitinthepaper，soIsupposeitmusthavebeenallright。 WeletH。O。taketheletter;itwasonlyfair，asitwashisblooditwaswrittenwith，andtoldhimtoleaveitnextdoorforMrsMorrison。 H。O。camebackquitequickly，andAlbert—next—door’sunclecamewithhim。 ’Whatisallthis，Albert？’hecried。’Alas，alas，mynephew！DoIfindyoutheprisonerofadesperatebandofbrigands？’ ’Bandits，’saidH。O;’youknowitsaysbandits。’ ’Ibegyourpardon，gentlemen，’saidAlbert—next—door’suncle，’banditsitis，ofcourse。This，Albert，isthedirectresultofthepursuitoftheguyonanoccasionwhenyourdotingmotherhadexpresslywarnedyoutoforgothepleasuresofthechase。’ Albertsaiditwasn’thisfault，andhehadn’twantedtoplay。 ’Soho！’saidhisuncle，’impenitenttoo！Where’sthedungeon？’ Weexplainedthedungeon，andshowedhimthestrawpalletandtheewerandthemoulderingcrustsandotherthings。 ’Veryprettyandcomplete，’hesaid。’Albert，youaremorehighlyprivilegedthaneverIwas。NooneevermademeanicedungeonwhenIwasyourage。IthinkIhadbetterleaveyouwhereyouare。’ Albertbegantocryagainandsaidhewassorry，andhewouldbeagoodboy。 ’Andonthisoldfamiliarbasisyouexpectmetoransomyou，doyou？Honestly，mynephew，Idoubtwhetheryouareworthit。 Besides，thesummentionedinthisdocumentstrikesmeasexcessive：Albertreallyisnotworththreethousandpounds。AlsobyastrangeandunfortunatechanceIhaven’tthemoneyaboutme。 Couldn’tyoutakeless？’ Wesaidperhapswecould。 ’Sayeightpence，’suggestedAlbert—next—door’suncle，’whichisallthesmallchangeIhappentohaveonmyperson。’ ’Thankyouverymuch，’saidAliceashehelditout;’butareyousureyoucanspareit？Becausereallyitwasonlyplay。’ ’Quitesure。Now，Albert，thegameisover。Youhadbetterrunhometoyourmotherandtellherhowmuchyou’veenjoyedyourself。’ WhenAlbert—next—doorhadgonehisunclesatintheGuyFawkesarmchairandtookAliceonhisknee，andwesatroundthefirewaitingtillitwouldbetimetoletoffourfireworks。WeroastedthechestnutshesentDickyoutfor，andhetoldusstoriestillitwasnearlyseven。Hisstoriesarefirst—rate—hedoesallthepartsindifferentvoices。Atlasthesaid— ’Lookhere，young—uns。Iliketoseeyouplayandenjoyyourselves，andIdon’tthinkithurtsAlberttoenjoyhimselftoo。’ ’Idon’tthinkhedidmuch，’saidH。O。ButIknewwhatAlbert—next—door’sunclemeantbecauseIammucholderthanH。O。 Hewenton— ’ButwhataboutAlbert’smother？Didn’tyouthinkhowanxiousshewouldbeathisnotcominghome？AsithappensIsawhimcomeinwithyou，soweknewitwasallright。ButifIhadn’t，eh？’ Heonlytalkslikethatwhenheisveryserious，orevenangry。 Othertimeshetalkslikepeopleinbooks—tous，Imean。 Wenoneofussaidanything。ButIwasthinking。ThenAlicespoke。 Girlsseemnottomindsayingthingsthatwedon’tsay。SheputherarmsroundAlbert—next—door’suncle’sneckandsaid— ’We’revery，verysorry。Wedidn’tthinkabouthismother。Youseewetryveryhardnottothinkaboutotherpeople’smothersbecause—’ JustthenweheardFather’skeyinthedoorandAlbert—next—door’sunclekissedAliceandputherdown，andweallwentdowntomeetFather。AswewentIthoughtIheardAlbert—next—door’sunclesaysomethingthatsoundedlike’Poorlittlebeggars！’ Hecouldn’thavemeantus，whenwe’dbeenhavingsuchajollytime，andchestnuts，andfireworkstolookforwardtoafterdinnerandeverything！ CHAPTER8 BEINGEDITORS ItwasAlbert’sunclewhothoughtofourtryinganewspaper。Hesaidhethoughtweshouldnotfindthebanditbusinessapayingindustry，asapermanency，andthatjournalismmightbe。 WehadsoldNoel’spoetryandthatpieceofinformationaboutLordTottenhamtothegoodeditor，sowethoughtitwouldnotbeabadideatohaveanewspaperofourown。Wesawplainlythateditorsmustbeveryrichandpowerful，becauseofthegrandofficeandthemanintheglasscase，likeamuseum，andthesoftcarpetsandbigwriting—table。Besidesourhavingseenawholehandfulofmoneythattheeditorpulledoutquitecarelesslyfromhistrouserspocketwhenhegavememyfivebob。 DorawantedtobeeditorandsodidOswald，buthegavewaytoherbecausesheisagirl，andafterwardsheknewthatitistruewhatitsaysinthecopy—booksaboutVirtuebeingitsownReward。 Becauseyou’venoideawhatabotheritis。Everybodywantedtoputineverythingjustastheyliked，nomatterhowmuchroomtherewasonthepage。Itwassimplyawful！Doraputupwithitaslongasshecouldandthenshesaidifshewasn’tletaloneshewouldn’tgoonbeingeditor;theycouldbethepaper’seditorsthemselves，sothere。 ThenOswaldsaid，likeagoodbrother：’Iwillhelpyouifyoulike，Dora，’andshesaid，’You’remoretroublethanalltherestofthem！Comeandbeeditorandseehowyoulikeit。Igiveituptoyou。’Butshedidn’t，andwedidittogether。WeletAlbert—next—doorbesub—editor，becausehehadhurthisfootwithanailinhisbootthatgathered。 WhenitwasdoneAlbert—next—door’sunclehaditcopiedforusintypewriting，andwesentcopiestoallourfriends，andthenofcoursetherewasnooneleftthatwecouldasktobuyit。Wedidnotthinkofthatuntiltoolate。WecalledthepapertheLewishamRecorder;Lewishambecausewelivethere，andRecorderinmemoryofthegoodeditor。Icouldwriteabetterpaperonmyhead，butaneditorisnotallowedtowriteallthepaper。Itisveryhard，butheisnot。Youjusthavetofillupwithwhatyoucangetfromotherwriters。IfIeverhavetimeIwillwriteapaperallbymyself。Itwon’tbepatchy。Wehadnotimetomakeitanillustratedpaper，butIdrewtheshipgoingdownwithallhandsforthefirstcopy。Butthetypewritercan’tdrawships，soitwasleftoutintheothercopies。Thetimethefirstpapertooktowriteoutnoonewouldbelieve！ThiswastheNewspaper： EDITORS：DORAANDOSWALDBASTABLE EditorialNoteEverypaperiswrittenforsomereason。Oursisbecausewewanttosellitandgetmoney。Ifwhatwehavewrittenbringshappinesstoanysadheartweshallnothavelabouredinvain。Butwewantthemoneytoo。Manypapersarecontentwiththesadheartandthehappiness，butwearenotlikethat，anditisbestnottobedeceitful。EDITORS。 Therewillbetwoserialstories;OnebyDickyandonebyallofus。Inaserialstoryyouonlyputinonechapteratatime。Butweshallputallourserialstoryatonce，ifDorahastimetocopyit。Dicky’swillcomelateron。 SerialStoryBYUSALL CHAPTERI—byDoraThesunwassettingbehindaromantic—lookingtowerwhentwostrangersmighthavebeenobserveddescendingthecrestofthehill。Theeldest，amanintheprimeoflife;theotherahandsomeyouthwhoremindedeverybodyofQuentinDurward。TheyapproachedtheCastle，inwhichthefairLadyAliciaawaitedherdeliverers。 Sheleanedfromthecastellatedwindowandwavedherlilyhandastheyapproached。Theyreturnedhersignal，andretiredtoseekrestandrefreshmentataneighbouringhostelry。 CHAPTERII—byAliceThePrincesswasveryuncomfortableinthetower，becauseherfairygodmotherhadtoldherallsortsofhorridthingswouldhappenifshedidn’tcatchamouseeveryday，andshehadcaughtsomanymicethatnowtherewerehardlyanylefttocatch。SoshesenthercarrierpigeontoaskthenobleStrangersiftheycouldsendherafewmice—becauseshewouldbeofageinafewdaysandthenitwouldn’tmatter。Sothefairygodmother——（I’mverysorry，butthere’snoroomtomakethechaptersanylonger。ED。） CHAPTERIII—bytheSub—Editor（Ican’t—I’dmuchrathernot—Idon’tknowhow。） CHAPTERIV—byDickyImustnowretracemystepsandtellyousomethingaboutourhero。 Youmustknowhehadbeentoanawfullyjollyschool，wheretheyhadturkeyandgooseeverydayfordinner，andneveranymutton，andasmanyhelpsofpuddingasafellowcaredtosenduphisplatefor—soofcoursetheyhadallgrownupverystrong，andbeforeheleftschoolhechallengedtheHeadtohaveitoutmantoman，andhegaveithim，Itellyou。ThatwastheeducationthatmadehimabletofightRedIndians，andtobethestrangerwhomighthavebeenobservedinthefirstchapter。 CHAPTERV—byNoelIthinkit’stimesomethinghappenedinthisstory。Sothenthedragonhecameout，blowingfireoutofhisnose，andhesaid— ’Comeon，youvaliantmanandtrue，I’dliketohaveaset—toalongofyou！’ （That’sbadEnglish。ED。Idon’tcare;it’swhatthedragonsaid。 Whotoldyoudragonsdidn’ttalkbadEnglish？NOEL。） Sothehero，whosenamewasNoeloninuris，replied— ’Mybladeissharp，myaxeiskeen，You’renotnearlyasbigasagoodmanydragonsI’veseen。’ （Don’tputinsomuchpoetry，Noel。It’snotfair，becausenoneoftheotherscandoit。ED。） Andthentheywentatit，andhebeatthedragon，justashedidtheHeadinDicky’spartoftheStory，andsohemarriedthePrincess，andtheylived——（Notheydidn’t—nottillthelastchapter。ED。） CHAPTERVI—byH。O。 Ithinkit’saveryniceStory—butwhataboutthemice？Idon’twanttosayanymore。Doracanhavewhat’sleftofmychapter。 CHAPTERVII—bytheEditorsAndsowhenthedragonwasdeadtherewerelotsofmice，becauseheusedtokillthemforhisteabutnowtheyrapidlymultipliedandravagedthecountry，sothefairladyAlicia，sometimescalledthePrincess，hadtosayshewouldnotmarryanyoneunlesstheycouldridthecountryofthisplagueofmice。ThenthePrince，whoserealnamedidn’tbeginwithN，butwasOsrawalddo，wavedhismagicsword，andthedragonstoodbeforethem，bowinggracefully。Theymadehimpromisetobegood，andthentheyforgavehim;andwhentheweddingbreakfastcame，allthebonesweresavedforhim。Andsotheyweremarriedandlivedhappyeverafter。 （Whatbecameoftheotherstranger？NOEL。 Thedragonatehimbecauseheaskedtoomanyquestions。EDITORS。） Thisistheendofthestory。 InstructiveitonlytakesfourhoursandaquarternowtogetfromLondontoManchester;butIshouldnotthinkanyonewouldiftheycouldhelpit。 Adreadfulwarning。Awickedboytoldmeaveryinstructivethingaboutginger。Theyhadopenedoneofthelargejars，andhehappenedtotakeoutquitealot，andhemadeitallrightbydroppingmarblesin，tilltherewasasmuchgingerasbefore。ButhetoldmethatontheSunday，whenitwascomingnearthepartwherethereisonlyjuicegenerally，Ihadnoideawhathisfeelingswere。Idon’tseewhathecouldhavesaidwhentheyaskedhim。Ishouldbesorrytoactlikeit。 ScientificExperimentsshouldalwaysbemadeoutofdoors。Anddon’tusebenzoline。 DICKY。 （Thatwaswhenheburnthiseyebrowsoff。ED。） Theearthis2，400milesround，and800through—atleastIthinkso，butperhapsit’stheotherway。 DICKY。 （Yououghttohavebeensurebeforeyoubegan。ED。） ScientificColumninthisso—calledNineteenthCenturyScienceisbuttoolittleconsideredinthenurseriesoftherichandproud。Butwearenotlikethat。 Itisnotgenerallyknownthatifyouputbitsofcamphorinluke—warmwateritwillmoveabout。Ifyoudropsweetoilin，thecamphorwilldartawayandthenstopmoving。Butdon’tdropanytillyouaretiredofit，becausethecamphorwon’tanymoreafterwards。Muchamusementandinstructionislostbynotknowingthingslikethis。 Ifyouputasixpenceunderashillinginawine—glass，andblowharddownthesideoftheglass，thesixpencewilljumpupandsitonthetopoftheshilling。AtleastIcan’tdoitmyself，butmycousincan。HeisintheNavy。 AnswerstoCorrespondentsNoel。Youareverypoetical，butIamsorrytosayitwillnotdo。 Alice。Nothingwillevermakeyourhaircurl，soit’snouse。 Somepeoplesayit’smoreimportanttotidyupasyougoalong。I don’tmeanyouinparticular，buteveryone。 H。O。Weneversaidyouweretubby，buttheEditordoesnotknowanycure。 Noel。Ifthereisanyofthepaperoverwhenthisnewspaperisfinished，Iwillexchangeitforyourshut—upinkstand，ortheknifethathastheusefulthinginitfortakingstonesoutofhorses’feet，butyoucan’thaveitwithout。 H。O。Therearemanywayshowyoursteamenginemightstopworking。 YoumightaskDicky。Heknowsoneofthem。Ithinkitisthewayyoursstopped。 Noel。Ifyouthinkthatbyfillingthegardenwithsandyoucanmakecrabsbuildtheirneststhereyouarenotatallsensible。 YouhavealteredyourpoemaboutthebattleofWaterloosooften，thatwecannotreaditexceptwheretheDukewaveshisswordandsayssomethingwecan’treadeither。Whydidyouwriteitonblotting—paperwithpurplechalk？ED。 （BecauseYOUKNOWWHOsneakedmypencil。NOEL。） PoetryTheAssyriancamedownlikeawolfonthefold，Andthewayhecamedownwasawful，I’mtold; Butit’snothingtothewayoneoftheEditorscomesdownonme，IfIcrumblemybread—and—butterorspillmytea。 NOEL。 CuriousFactsIfyouholdaguinea—pigupbyhistailhiseyesdropout。