第2章

\"Peaches？\"saidhe，withextremedeliberation。 \"Well，no，Sir。Notforthreeorfourweeksyet。 Ihaven’tanyideawhereyoumightfindsome。Theremaybeafewintownfromundertheglass，butthey’dbebardtolocate。Maybeatoneofthemoreexpen— sivehotels—someplacewherethere’splentyofmoneytowaste。I’vegotsomeveryfineoranges，though—fromashiploadthatcameinto—day。\" TheKidlingeredonthecornerforamoment，andthensetoutbrisklytowardapairofgreenlightsthatflankedthestepsofabuildingdownadarksidestreet。 \"Captainaroundanywhere？\"heaskedofthedesksergeantofthepolicestation。 Atthatmomentthecaptaincamebrisklyforwardfromtherear。Hewasinplainclothesandhadabusyair。 \"Hello，Kid，\"hesaidtothepugilist。\"Thoughtyouwerebridal—touring？ \"Gotbackyesterday。I’masolidcitizennow。 ThinkI’lltakeaninterestinmunicipaldoings。HowwoulditsuityoutogetintoDenverDick’splaceto— night，Cap？ \"Pastperformances，\"saidthecaptain，twistinghismoustache。\"Denverwascloseduptwomonthsago。\" \"Correct，\"saidtheKid。\"RaffertychasedhimoutoftheForty—third。He’srunninginyourpre— cinctnow，andhisgame’sbiggerthanever。I’mdownonthisgamblingbusiness。Icanputyouagainsthisgame。\" \"Inmyprecinct？\"growledthecaptain。\"Areyousure，Kid？I’lltakeitasafavor。Haveyougottheentree？Howisittobedone？\" \"Hammers，\"saidtheKid。\"Theyhaven’tgotanysteelonthedoorsyet。You’llneedtenmen。 No，theywon’tletmeintheplace。Denverhasbeentryingtodome。HethoughtItippedhimofffortheotherraid。Ididn’t，though。Youwanttohurry。 I’vegottogetbackhome。Thehouseisonlythreeblocksfromhere。\" Beforetenminuteshadspedthecaptainwithadozenmenstolewiththeirguideintothehallwayofadarkandvirtuous—lookingbuildinginwhichmanybusinesseswereconductedbyday。 \"Thirdfloor，rear，\"saidtheKid，softly。\"I’llleadtheway。\" Twoaxemenfacedthedoorthathepointedouttothem。 \"Itseemsallquiet，\"saidthecaptain，doubtfully。 \"Areyousureyourtipisstraight？\" \"Cutaway！\"saidtheKid。\"It’sonmeifitain’t。\" Theaxescrashedthroughtheasyetunprotecteddoor。Ablazeoflightfromwithinpouredthroughthesmashedpanels。Thedoorfell，andtheraidersrangintotheroomwiththeirgunshandy。 Thebigroomwasfurnishedwiththegaudymag— nificencedeartoDenverDick’swesternideas。Vari— ouswell—patronizedgameswereinprogress。Aboutfiftymenwhowereintheroomrusheduponthepoliceinagrandbreakforpersonalliberty。Theplain— clothesmenhadtodoalittleclub—swinging。Morethanhalfthepatronsescaped。 DenverDickhadgracedhisgamewithhisownpresencethatnight。Heledtherushthatwasin— tendedtosweepawaythesmallerbodyofraiders，ButwhenbesawtheKidhismannerbecamepersonal。 Beingintheheavyweightclassbecasthimselfjoy— fullyuponhisslighterenemy，andtheyrolleddownaflightofstairsineachothersarms。Ontheland— ingtheyseparatedandarose，andthentheKidwasabletousesomeofhisprofessionaltactics，whichhadbeenuselesstohimwhileintheexcitedclutchofa200—poundsportinggentlemanwhowasabouttolose$20，000worthofparaphernalia。 AftervanquishinghisadversarytheKidhurriedupstairsandthroughthegambling—roomintoasmallerapartmentconnectingbyanarcheddoorway。 Herewasalongtablesetwithchoicestchinawareandsilver，andlavishlyfurnishedwithfoodofthatexpensiveandspectacularsortofwhichthedevoteesofsportaresupposedtobefond。Hereagainwastobeperceivedtheliberalandfloridtasteofthegen— tlemanwiththeurbancognomenalprefix。 ANo。10patentleathershoeprotrudedafewofitsinchesoutsidethetableclothalongthefloor。TheKidseizedthisandpluckedforthablackmaninawhitetieandthegarbofaservitor。 \"Getup！\"commandedtheKid。\"Areyouinchargeofthisfreelunch？\" \"Yes，sah，Iwas。Hastheydonepinchedusag’in，boss？\" \"Looksthatway。Listentome。Arethereanypeachesinthislayout？Ifthereain’tI’llhavetothrowupthesponge。\" \"Therewasthreedozen，sah，whenthegameopenedthisevenin’;butIreckonthegentlemendoneeat’emallup。Ifyou’dliketoeatafust—rateorange，sah，Ikinfindyousome。\" \"Getbusy，\"orderedtheKid，sternly，andmovewhateverpeachcropyou’vegotquickorthere’llbetrouble。Ifanybodyorangesmeagainto—night，I’llknockhisfaceoff。\" TheraidonDenverDick’shigh—pricedandprodi— galluncheonrevealedonelone，lastpeachthathadescapedtheepicureanjawsofthefollowersofchance。IntotheKid’spocketitwent，andthatin— defatigableforagerdepartedimmediatelywithhisprize。Withscarcelyaglanceatthesceneonthesidewalkbelow，wheretheofficerswereloadingtheirprisonersintothepatrolwagons，bemovedhomewardwithlong，swiftstrides。 Hisheartwaslightasbewent。SorodetheknightsbacktoCamelotafterperilsandhighdeedsdonefortheirladiesfair。TheKid’sladyhadcom— mandedhimandbehadobeyed。True，itwasbutapeachthatshehadcraved;butithadbeennosmalldeedtogleanapeachatmidnightfromthatwintrycitywhereyettheFebruarysnowslaylikeiron。 Shehadaskedforapeach;shewashisbride;inhispocketthepeachwaswarminginhisbandthathelditforfearthatitmightfalloutandbelost。 OnthewaytheKidturnedinatanall—nightdrugstoreandsaidtothespectacledclerk： \"Say，sport，Iwishyou’dsizeupthisribofmineandseeifit’sbroke。Iwasinalittlescrapandbumpeddownaflightortwoofstairs。\" Thedruggistmadeanexamination。 \"Itisn’tbroken，\"washisdiagnosis，\"butyouhaveabruisetherethatlookslikeyou’dfallenofftheFlatirontwice。\" \"That’sallright，\"saidtheKid。\"Let’shaveyourclothesbrush，please。\" Thebridewaitedintherosyglowofthepinklampshade。Themiracleswerenotallpassedaway。Bybreathingadesireforsomeslightthing—aflower，apomegranate，a—oh，yes，apeach—shecouldsendforthhermanintothenight，intotheworldwhichcouldnotwithstandhim，andhewoulddoherbidding。 Andnowbestoodbyherchairandlaidthepeachinherband。 \"Naughtyboy！\"shesaid，fondly。\"DidIsayapeach？IthinkIwouldmuchratherhavehadanorange。\" Blestbethebride。 THEHARBINGER Longbeforethespringtideisfeltinthedullbosomoftheyokeldoesthecitymanknowthatthegrass— greengoddessisuponherthrone。Hesitsathisbreakfasteggsandtoast，begirtbystonewalls，openshismorningpaperandseesjournalismleavevernal— ismatthepost。 For，whereas，spring’scourierswereoncetheevi— denceofourfinersenses，nowtheAssociatedPressdoesthetrick。 ThewarbleofthefirstrobininHackensack，thestirringofthemaplesapinBennington，thebud— dingofthepussywillowsalongMainStreetinSyra— cuse，thefirstchirpofthebluebird，theswansongoftheBluePoint，theannualtornadoinSt。Louis，theplaintofthepeachpessimistfromPompton，N。 J。，theregularvisitofthetamewildgoosewithabrokenlegtothepondnearBilgewaterJunction，thebaseattemptoftheDrugTrusttoboostthepriceofquininefoiledintheHousebyCongressmanJinks，thefirsttallpoplarstruckbylightningandtheusualstunnedpicknickerswhohadtakenrefuge，thefirstcrackoftheicejamintheAlleghenyRiver，thefindingofavioletinitsmossybedbythecorrespondentatRoundCorners—thesearetheadvancesignsoftheburgeoningseasonthatarewiredintothewisecity，whilethefarmerseesnothingbutwinteruponhisdrearyfields。 Butthesebemereexternals。Thetrueharbingeristheheart。WhenStrephonseekshisChloeandMikehisMaggie，thenonlyisspringarrivedandthenewspaperreportofthefive—footrattlerkilledinSquirePettigrew’spastureconfirmed。 Erethefirstvioletblew，Mr。Peters，Mr。RagsdaleandMr。KiddsattogetheronabenchinUnionSquareandconspired。Mr。PeterswastheD’Artag— nanoftheloafersthere。Hewasthedingiest，thelaziest，thesorriestbrownblotagainstthegreenback— groundofanybenchinthepark。Butjustthenhewasthemostimportantofthetrio。 Mr。Petershadawife。ThishadnotheretoforeaffectedhisstandingwithRagsyandKidd。Butto— dayitinvestedhimwithapeculiarinterest。Hisfriends，havingescapedmatrimony，hadshownadispositiontoderideMr。Petersforhisventureonthattroubledsea。ButatlasttheyhadbeenforcedtoacknowledgethateitherhehadbeengiftedwithalargeforesightorthathewasoneofFortune’sluckysons。 For，Mrs。Petershadadollar。Awholedollarbill，goodandreceivablebytheGovernmentforcustoms，taxesandallpublicdues。Howtogetpossessionofthatdollarwasthequestionupfordiscussionbythethreemustymusketeers。 \"Howdoyouknowitwasadollar？\"askedRagsy，theimmensityofthesuminclininghimtoscepticism。 \"Thecoalmanseenherhaveit，\"saidMr。Peters。 \"Shewentoutanddonesomewashingyesterday。 Andlookwhatshegivemeforbreakfast—theheelofaloafandacupofcoffee，andherwithadollar！\" \"It’sfierce，\"saidRagsy。 \"Saywegoupandpunch’erandstickatowelin’ermouthandcopthecoin\"suggestedKidd，Viciously。\"Y’ain’tafraidofawoman，areyou？\" \"Shemighthollerandhaveuspinched，\"demurredRagsy。\"Idon’tbelieveinsluggingnowomaninahousefulofpeople。\" \"Gent’men，\"saidMr。Peters，severely，throughhisrussetstubble，\"rememberthatyouarespeakingofmywife。Amanwhowouldlifthishandtoaladyexceptinthewayof——\" \"Maguire，\"saidRagsy，pointedly，\"hasgothisbockbeersignout。Ifwehadadollarwecould——\" \"Hushup！\"saidMr。Peters，lickinghislips。 \"Wegottogetthatcasenotesomehow，boys。Ain’twhat’saman’swife’shis？Leaveittome。I’llgoovertothehouseandgetit。Waithereforme。\" \"I’veseen’emgiveupquick，andtellyouwhereit’shidifyoukick’emintheribs，\"saidKidd。 \"Nomanwouldkickawoman，\"saidPeters，vir— tuously。\"Alittlechoking—justatouchonthewindpipe—thatgetsawaywith’em—andnomarksleft。Waitforme。I’llbringbackthatdollar，boys。\" Highupinatenement—housebetweenSecondAve— nueandtheriverlivedthePetersesinabackroomsogloomythatthelandlordblushedtotaketherentforit。Mrs。Petersworkedatsundrytimes，doingoddjobsofscrubbingandwashing。Mr。Petershadapure，unbrokenrecordoffiveyearswithouthavingearnedapenny。Andyettheyclungtogether，shar— ingeachother’shatredandmisery，beingcreaturesofhabit。Ofhabit，thepowerthatkeepstheearthfromflyingtopieces;thoughthereissomesillytheoryofgravitation。 Mrs。Petersreposedher200poundsonthesaferofthetwochairsandgazedstolidlyouttheonewin— dowatthebrickwallopposite。Hereyeswereredanddamp。Thefurniturecouldhavebeencarriedawayonapushcart，butnopushcartmanwouldhaveremoveditasagift。 ThedooropenedtoadmitMr。Peters。Hisfox— terriereyesexpressedawish。Hiswife’sdiagnosislocatedcorrectlytheseatofit，butmisreadithun— gerinsteadofthirst。 \"You’llgetnothingmoretoeattillnight，\"shesaid，lookingoutofthewindowagain。Takeyourhound—dog’sfaceoutoftheroom。\" Mr。Peters’seyecalculatedthedistancebetweenthem。Bytakingherbysurpriseitmightbepos— sibletospringuponher，overthrowher，andapplythethrottlingtacticsofwhichhehadboastedtohiswaitingcomrades。True，ithadbeenonlyaboast;neveryethadbedaredtolayviolentbandsuponher;butwiththethoughtsofthedelicious，coolbockorCulmbacherbracinghisnerves，hewasneartoupsettinghisowntheoriesofthetreatmentduebyagentlemantoalady。But，withhisloafer’sloveforthemoreartisticandlessstrenuousway，hechosediplomacyfirst，thehighcardinthegame——theas— sumedattitudeofsuccessalreadyattained。 \"Youhaveadollar，\"hesaid，loftily，butsignifi— cantlyinthetonethatgoeswiththelightingofacigar—whenthepropertiesareathand。\" \"Ihave，\"saidMrs。Peters，producingthebillfromherbosomandcracklingit，teasingly。 \"Iamofferedapositionina——inateastore，\" saidMr。Peters。\"Iamtobeginworkto—morrow。 Butitwillbenecessaryformetobuyapairof——\" \"Youarealiar，\"saidMrs。Peters，reinterringthenote。\"Noteastore，nornoABCstore，nornojunkshopwouldhaveyou。Irubbedtheskinoffbothmehandswashin’jumpersandoverallstomakethatdollar。Doyouthinkitcomeoutofthemsudstobuythekindyouputintoyou？Skiddoo！Getyourmindoffofmoney。\" EvidentlytheposesofTalleyrandwerenotworthonehundredcentsonthatdollar。Butdiplomacyisdexterous。TheartistictemperamentofMr。Petersliftedhimbythestrapsofhiscongressgaitersandsethimonnewground。Hecalledupalookofdes— peratemelancholytohiseyes。 \"Clara，\"hesaid，hollowly，\"tostrugglefurtherisuseless。Youhavealwaysmisunderstoodme。 HeavenknowsIhavestrivenwithallmymighttokeepmyheadabovethewavesofmisfortune，but—\" \"Cutouttherainbowofhopeandthatstuffaboutwalkin’onebyonethroughthenarrowislesofSpain，\"saidMrs。Peters，withasigh。\"I’vehearditsooften。There’sanouncebottleofcarbolicontheshelfbehindtheemptycoffeecan。Drinkhearty。\" Mr。Petersreflected。Whatnext！Theoldex— pedientshadfailed。Thetwomustymusketeerswereawaitinghimhardbytheruinedchateau——thatistosay，onaparkbenchwithricketycast—ironlegs。 Hishonorwasatstake。Hehadengagedtostormthecastlesingle—handedandbringbackthetreas— urethatwastofurnishthemwassailandsolace。Andallthatstoodbetweenhimandthecoveteddollarwashiswife，oncealittlegirlwhomhecould——aha！ ——whynotagain？Oncewithsoftwordshecould，astheysay，twistheraroundhislittlefinger。Whynotagain？Notforyearshadhetriedit。Grimpovertyandmutualhatredhadkilledallthat。ButRagsyandKiddwerewaitingforhimtobringthedollar！ Mr。Peterstookasurreptitiouslykeenlookathiswife。Herformlessbulkoverflowedthechair。Shekepthereyesfixedoutthewindowinastrangekindoftrance。Hereyesshowedthatshehadbeenre— centlyweeping。 \"Iwonder，\"saidMr。Peterstohimself，\"ifthere’dbeanythinginit。\" Thewindowwasopenuponitsoutlookofbrickwallsanddrab，barrenbackyards。Exceptforthemildnessoftheairthatentereditmighthavebeenmidwinteryetinthecitythatturnssuchafrown— ingfacetobesiegingspring。Butspringdoesn’tcomewiththethunderofcannon。Sheisasapperandaminer，andyoumustcapitulate。 \"I’lltryit，\"saidMr。Peterstohimself，makingawryface。 Hewentuptohiswifeandputhisarmacrosshershoulders。 \"Clara，darling，\"hesaidintonesthatshouldn’thavefooledababyseal，\"whyshouldwehavehardwords？Ain’tyoumyowntootsumwootsums？ \"Ablackmarkagainstyou，Mr。Peters，inthesa— redledgerofCupid。Chargesofattemptedgraftarefiledagainstyou，andofforgeryandutteranceoftwoofLove’sholiestofappellations。 Butthemiracleofspringwaswrought。IntothebackroomoverthebackalleybetweentheblackwallshadcrepttheHarbinger。Itwasridiculous，andyet—Well，itisarattrap，andyou，madamandsirandallofus，areinit。 RedandfatandcryinglikeNiobeorNiagara，Mrs。Petersthrewherarmsaroundherlordanddissolveduponhim。Mr。Peterswouldhavestriventoextricatethedollarbillfromitsdepositvault，buthisarmswereboundtohissides。 \"Doyouloveme，James？\"askedMrs。Peters。 \"Madly，\"saidJames，\"but——\" \"Youareill！\"exclaimedMrs。Peters。\"Whyareyousopaleandtiredlooking？\" \"Ifeelweak，\"saidMr。Peters。\"I——\" \"Oh，wait;Iknowwhatitis。Wait，James。I’llbebackinaminutes’’ WithapartingbugthatrevivedinMr。PetersrecollectionsoftheTerribleTurk，hiswifehurriedoutoftheroomanddownthestairs。 Mr。Petershitchedhisthumbsunderhissus— penders。 \"Allright，\"heconfidedtotheceiling。\"I’vegothergoing。Ihadn’tanyideatheoldgirlwassoftanymoreunderthefoolishrib。Well，sir;ain’tI theClaudeMelnotteofthelowerEastSide？What？ It’sa100to1shotthatIgetthedollar。Iwonderwhatshewentoutfor。Iguessshe’sgonetotellMrs。Muldoononthesecondfloor，thatwe’rerecon— ciled。I’llrememberthis。Softsoap！AndRagsywastalkingaboutsluggingher！ Mrs。Peterscamebackwithabottleofsarsapa— rilla。 \"I’mgladIhappenedtohavethatdollar，\"shesaid。\"You’reallrundown，boney。\" Mr。Petershadatablespoonfulofthestuffin— sertedintohim。ThenMrs。Peterssatonhislapandmurmured： \"Callmetootsumwootsumsagain，James。\" Hesatstill，heldtherebyhismaterializedgoddessofspring。 Springhadcome。 OnthebenchinUnionSquareMr。RagsdaleandMr。Kiddsquirmed，tongue—parched，awaitingD’Artagnanandhisdollar。 \"IwishIhadchokedheratfirst，\"saidMr。Peterstohimself。 WHILETHEAUTOWAITS Promptlyatthebeginningoftwilight，cameagaintothatquietcornerofthatquiet，smallparkthegirlingray。Shesatuponabenchandreadabook，fortherewasyettocomeahalfhourinwhichprintcouldbeaccomplished。 Torepeat：Herdresswasgray，andplainenoughtomaskitsimpeccancyofstyleandfit。Alarge— meshedveilimprisonedherturbanhatandafacethatshonethroughitwithacalmandunconsciousbeauty。Shehadcomethereatthesamehouronthedayprevious，andonthedaybeforethat;andtherewasonewhoknewit。 Theyoungmanwhoknewithoverednear，relyinguponburntsacrificestothegreatjoss，Luck。Hispietywasrewarded，for，inturningapage，herbookslippedfromherfingersandboundedfromthebenchafullyardaway。 Theyoungmanpounceduponitwithinstantavid— ity，returningittoitsownerwiththatairthatseemstoflourishinparksandpublicplaces—acompoundofgallantryandhope，temperedwithrespectforthepolicemanonthebeat。Inapleasantvoice，beriskedaninconsequentremarkupontheweatherthatin— troductorytopicresponsibleforsomuchoftheworld’sunhappiness—andstoodpoisedforamo— ment，awaitinghisfate。 Thegirllookedhimoverleisurely;athisordinary，neatdressandhisfeaturesdistinguishedbynothingparticularinthewayofexpression。 \"Youmaysitdown，ifyoulike，\"shesaid，inafull，deliberatecontralto。\"Really，Iwouldliketohaveyoudoso。Thelightistoobadforreading。 Iwouldprefertotalk。\" ThevassalofLuckslidupontheseatbyhersidewithcomplaisance。 \"Doyouknow，\"besaid，speakingtheformulawithwhichparkchairmenopentheirmeetings，\"thatyouarequitethestunningestgirlIhaveseeninalongtime？Ihadmyeyeonyouyesterday。 Didn’tknowsomebodywasbowledoverbythoseprettylampsofyours，didyou，honeysuckle？\" \"Whoeveryouare，\"saidthegirl，inicytones，\"youmustrememberthatIamalady。Iwillexcusetheremarkyouhavejustmadebecausethemistakewas，doubtless，notanunnaturalone——inyourcircle。 Iaskedyoutositdown;iftheinvitationmustcon— stitutemeyourhoneysuckle，consideritwith— drawn。\" \"Iearnestlybegyourpardon，\"pleadedtheyoungran。Hisexpressionofsatisfactionhadchangedtooneofpenitenceandhumility。Itwasmyfault，youknow—Imean，therearegirlsinparks，youknow—thatis，ofcourse，youdon’tknow，but——\" \"Abandonthesubject，ifyouplease。OfcourseIknow。Now，tellmeaboutthesepeoplepassingandcrowding，eachway，alongthesepaths。Wherearetheygoing？Whydotheyhurryso？Aretheyhappy？\" Theyoungmanhadpromptlyabandonedhisairofcoquetry。Hiscuewasnowforawaitingpart; hecouldnotguesstherolebewouldbeexpectedtoplay。 \"Itisinterestingtowatchthem，\"hereplied，pos— tulatinghermood。\"Itisthewonderfuldramaoflife。Somearegoingtosupperandsometo——er—— otherplaces。Onewonderswhattheirhistoriesare。\" \"Idonot，\"saidthegirl;\"Iamnotsoinquisi— tive。Icomeheretositbecausehere，only，canIbetearthegreat，common，throbbingheartofhu— manity。Mypartinlifeiscastwhereitsbeatsareneverfelt。CanyousurmisewhyIspoketoyou，Mr。——？\" \"Parkenstacker，\"suppliedtheyoungman。Thenbelookedeagerandhopeful。 \"No，\"saidthegirl，holdingupaslenderfinger，andsmilingslightly。\"Youwouldrecognizeitim— mediately。Itisimpossibletokeepone’snameoutofprint。Orevenone’sportrait。Thisveilandthishatofmymaidfurnishmewithanincog。YoushouldhaveseenthechauffeurstareatitwhenhethoughtIdidnotsee。Candidly，therearefiveorsixnamesthatbelongintheholyofholies，andmine，bytheaccidentofbirth，isoneofthem。Ispoketoyou，Mr。Stackenpot——\" \"Parkenstacker，\"correctedtheyoungman，mod— estly。 \"——Mr。Parkenstacker，becauseIwantedtotalk，foronce，withanaturalman——oneunspoiledbythedespicableglossofwealthandsupposedsocialsu— periority。Oh！youdonotknowhowwearyIamofit——money，money，money！Andofthemenwhosurroundme，dancinglikelittlemarionettesallcutbythesamepattern。Iamsickofpleasure，ofjewels，oftravel，ofsociety，ofluxuriesofallkinds。\" \"Ialwayshadanidea，\"venturedtheyoungman，hesitatingly，\"thatmoneymustbeaprettygoodthing。\" \"Acompetenceistobedesired。Butwhenyouleavesomanymillionsthat——！\"Sheconcludedthesentencewithagestureofdespair。\"Itisthemo— otonyofit\"shecontinued，\"thatpalls。Drives，dinners，theatres，balls，suppers，withthegildingofsuperfluouswealthoveritall。Sometimestheverytinkleoftheiceinmychampagneglassnearlydrivesmemad。\" Mr。Parkenstackerlookedingenuouslyinterested。 \"Ihavealwaysliked，\"hesaid，\"toreadandhearaboutthewaysofwealthyandfashionablefolks。I supposeIamabitofasnob。ButIliketohavemyinformationaccurate。Now，Ihadformedtheopin— ionthatchampagneiscooledinthebottleandnotbyplacingiceintheglass。\" Thegirlgaveamusicallaughofgenuineamuse— ment。 \"Youshouldknow，\"sheexplained，inanindul— genttone，\"thatweofthenon—usefulclassdependforouramusementupondeparturefromprecedent。 Justnowitisafadtoputiceinchampagne。TheideawasoriginatedbyavisitingPrinceofTartarywhilediningattheWaldorf。Itwillsoongivewaytosomeotherwhim。JustasatadinnerpartythisweekonMadisonAvenueagreenkidglovewaslaidbytheplateofeachguesttobeputonandusedwhileeatingolives。\" \"Isee，\"admittedtheyoungman，humbly。 \"Thesespecialdiversionsoftheinnercircledonotbecomefamiliartothecommonpublic。\" \"Sometimes，\"continuedthegirl，acknowledginghisconfessionoferrorbyaslightbow，\"IhavethoughtthatifIevershouldloveamanitwouldbeoneoflowlystation。Onewhoisaworkerandnotadrone。But，doubtless，theclaimsofcasteandwealthwillprovestrongerthanmyinclination。JustnowIambesiegedbytwo。OneisaGrandDukeofaGermanprincipality。Ithinkhehas，orhasbad，awife，somewhere，drivenmadbyhisintemperanceandcruelty。TheotherisanEnglishMarquis，socoldandmercenarythatIevenpreferthediabolismoftheDuke。Whatisitthatimpelsmetotellyouthesethings，Mr。Packenstacker？ \"Parkenstacker，\"breathedtheyoungman。\"In— deed，youcannotknowhowmuchIappreciateyourconfidences。\" Thegirlcontemplatedhimwiththecalm，imper— sonalregardthatbefittedthedifferenceintheirsta— tions。 \"Whatisyourlineofbusiness，Mr。Parken— stacker？\"sheasked。 \"Averyhumbleone。ButIhopetoriseintheworld。Wereyoureallyinearnestwhenyousaidthatyoucouldloveamanoflowlyposition？\" \"IndeedIwas。ButIsaid’might。’ThereistheGrandDukeandtheMarquis，youknow。Yes;nocallingcouldbetoohumblewerethemanwhatI wouldwishhimtobe。\" \"Iwork，\"declaredMr。Parkenstacker，\"inares— taurant。\" Thegirlshrankslightly。 \"Notasawaiter？\"shesaid，alittleimploringly。 \"Laborisnoble，butpersonalattendance，youknow——valetsand——\" \"Iamnotawaiter。Iamcashierin\"——onthestreettheyfacedthatboundedtheoppositesideoftheparkwasthebrilliantelectricsign\"RESTAU— RANT\"——\"Iamcashierinthatrestaurantyouamthere。\" Thegirlconsultedatinywatchsetinabraceletofrichdesignuponherleftwrist，androse，hurriedly。 Shethrustherbookintoaglitteringreticulesus— pendedfromherwaist，forwhich，however，thebookwastoolarge。 \"Whyareyounotatwork？\"sheasked。 \"Iamonthenightturn，\"saidtheyoungman; itisyetanhourbeforemyperiodbegins。MayI nothopetoseeyouagain？\" \"Idonotknow。Perhaps—butthewhimmaynotseizemeagain。Imustgoquicklynow。Thereisadinner，andaboxattheplay——and，oh！thesameoldround。Perhapsyounoticedanautomobileattheuppercorneroftheparkasyoucame。Onewithawhitebody\"Andredrunninggear？\"askedtheyoungman，knittinghisbrowsreflectively。 \"Yes。Ialwayscomeinthat。Pierrewaitsformethere。Hesupposesmetobeshoppinginthede— partmentstoreacrossthesquare。Conceiveofthebondageofthelifewhereinwemustdeceiveevenourchauffeurs。Good—night。\" \"Butitisdarknow，\"saidMr。Parkenstacker，\"andtheparkisfullofrudemen。MayInotwalk——\" \"Ifyouhavetheslightestregardformywishes，\" saidthegirl，firmly，\"youwillremainatthisbenchfortenminutesafterIhaveleft。Idonotmeantoaccuseyou，butyouareprobablyawarethatautosgenerallybearthemonogramoftheirowner。Again，good—night\" Swiftandstatelyshemovedawaythroughthedusk。Theyoungmanwatchedhergracefulformasshereachedthepavementatthepark’sedge，andturnedupalongittowardthecornerwherestoodtheautomobile。Thenhetreacherouslyandunhesitat— inglybegantododgeandskimamongtheparktreesandshrubberyinacourseparalleltoherroute，keep— ingherwellinsightWhenshereachedthecornersheturnedherheadtoglanceatthemotorcar，andthenpassedit，continuingonacrossthestreet。Shelteredbehindacon— venientstandingcab，theyoungmanfollowedhermovementscloselywithhiseyes。Passingdownthesidewalkofthestreetoppositethepark，sheenteredtherestaurantwiththeblazingsign。Theplacewasoneofthosefranklyglaringestablishments，allwhite，paintandglass，whereonemaydinecheaplyandconspicuously。Thegirlpenetratedtherestauranttosomeretreatatitsrear，whenceshequicklyemergedwithoutherbatandveil。 Thecashier’sdeskwaswelltothefront。Ared— headgirlanthestoolclimbeddown，glancingpointedlyattheclockasshedidso。Thegirlingraymountedinherplace。 Theyoungmanthrusthishandsintohispocketsandwalkedslowlybackalongthesidewalk。Atthecornerhisfootstruckasmall，paper—coveredvolumelyingthere，sendingitslidingtotheedgeoftheturf。Byitspicturesquecoverherecognizeditasthebookthegirlhadbeenreading。Hepickeditupcarelessly，andsawthatitstitlewas\"NewArabianNights，\"theauthorbeingofthenameofStevenson。 Hedroppeditagainuponthegrass，andlounged，irresolute，foraminute。Thenhesteppedintotheautomobile，reclineduponthecushions，andsaidtwowordstothechauffeur： \"Club，Henri。\" ACOMEDYINRUBBER Onemayhope，inspiteofthemetaphorists，toavoidthebreathofthedeadlyupastree;onemay，bygreatgoodfortune，succeedinblackingtheeyeofthebasilisk;onemightevendodgetheattentionsofCer— berusandArgus，butnoman，aliveordead，canes— capethegazeoftheRubberer。 NewYorkistheCaoutchoucCity。Therearemany，ofcourse，whogotheirways，makingmoney，withoutturningtotherightortheleft，butthereisatribeabroadwonderfullycomposed，liketheMartians，solelyofeyesandmeansoflocomotion。 Thesedevoteesofcuriosityswarm，likeflies，inamomentinastruggling，breathlesscircleaboutthesceneofanunusualoccurrence。Ifaworkmanopensamanhole，ifastreetcarrunsoveramanfromNorthTarrytown，ifalittleboydropsaneggonhiswayhomefromthegrocery，ifacasualhouseortwodropsintothesubway，ifaladylosesanickelthroughaholeinthelislethread，ifthepolicedragatelephoneandaracingchartforthfromanIbsenSocietyreading—room，ifSenatorDepeworMr。 ChuckConnorswalksouttotaketheair—ifanyoftheseincidentsoraccidentstakesplace，youwillseethemad，irresistiblerushofthe\"rubber\"tribetothespot。 Theimportanceoftheeventdoesnotcount。Theygazewithequalinterestandabsorptionatacho— rusgirloratamanpaintingaliverpillsign。Theywillformasdeepacordonaroundamanwithaclub— footastheywillaroundabalkedautomobile。Theyhavethefurorrubberendi。Theyareopticalglut— tons，feastingandfatteningonthemisfortunesoftheirfellowbeings。Theygloatandporeandglareandsquintandstarewiththeirfishyeyeslikegoggle— eyedperchatthebookbaitedwithcalamity。 ItwouldseemthatCupidwouldfindtheseocularvampirestoocoldgameforhiscalorificshafts，buthavewenotyettodiscoveranimmuneevenamongtheProtozoa？Yes，beautifulRomancedescendedupontwoofthistribe，andlovecameintotheirheartsastheycrowdedabouttheprostrateformofamanwhohadbeenrunoverbyabrewerywagon。 WilliamPrywasthefirstonthespot。Hewasanexpertatsuchgatherings。Withanexpressionofin— tensehappinessonhisfeatures，bestoodoverthevic— timoftheaccident，listeningtohisgroansasiftothesweetestmusic。WhenthecrowdofspectatorshadswelledtoacloselypackedcircleWilliamsawaviolentcommotioninthecrowdoppositehim。Menwerehurledasidelikeninepinsbytheimpactofsomemovingbodythatclovethemliketherushofator— nado。Withelbows，umbrella，hat—pin，tongue，andfingernailsdoingtheirduty，VioletSeymourforcedherwaythroughthemobofonlookerstothefirstrow。 Strongmenwhoevenhadbeenabletosecureaseatonthe5。30Harlemexpressstaggeredbacklikechil— drenasshebuckedcentre。TwolargeladyspectatorswhobadseentheDukeofRoxburghmarriedandhadoftenblockedtrafficonTwenty—thirdStreetfellbackintothesecondrowwithrippedshirtwaistswhenViolethadfinishedwiththem。WilliamPrylovedheratfirstsight。 TheambulanceremovedtheunconsciousagentofCupid。WilliamandVioletremainedafterthecrowdhaddispersed。TheyweretrueRubberers。Peoplewholeavethesceneofanaccidentwiththeambulancehavenotgenuinecaoutchoucinthecosmogonyoftheirnecks。Thedelicate，fineflavoroftheaffairistobebadonlyintheafter—taste—ingloatingoverthespot，ingazingfixedlyatthehousesopposite，inhoveringthereinadreammoreexquisitethantheopium—eater’secstasy。WilliamPryandVioletSey— mourwereconnoisseursincasualties。Theyknewbowtoextractfullenjoymentfromeveryincident。 Presentlytheylookedateachother。Violethadabrownbirthmarkonherneckaslargeasasilverhalf—dollar。Williamfixedhiseyesuponit。WilliamPryhadinordinatelybowedlegs。Violetallowedhergazetolingerunswervinglyuponthem。Facetofacetheystoodthusformoments，eachstaringattheother。Etiquettewouldnotallowthemtospeak;butintheCaoutchoucCityitispermittedtogazewith— outstintatthetreesintheparksandatthephysi— calblemishesofafellowcreature。 Atlengthwithasightheyparted。ButCupidhadbeenthedriverofthebrewerywagon，andthewheelthatbrokealegunitedtwofondhearts。 ThenextmeetingoftheheroandheroinewasinfrontofaboardfencenearBroadway。Thedayhadbeenadisappointingone。Therehadbeennofightsonthestreet，childrenhadkeptfromunderthewheelsofthestreetcars，cripplesandfatmeninnegligeeshirtswerescarce;nobodyseemedtobeinclinedtosliponbananapeelsorfalldownwithheartdisease。 EventhesportfromKokomo，Ind。，whoclaimstobeacousinofex—MayorLowandscattersnickelsfromacabwindow，hadnotputinhisappearance。 Therewasnothingtostareat，andWilliamPryhadpremonitionsofennui。 Buthesawalargecrowdscramblingandpushingexcitedlyinfrontofabillboard。Sprintingforit，heknockeddownanoldwomanandachildcarryingabottleofmilk，andfoughthiswaylikeademonintothemassofspectators。AlreadyintheinnerlinestoodVioletSeymourwithonesleeveandtwogoldfill— ingsgone，acorsetsteelpunctureandasprainedwrist，buthappy。Shewaslookingatwhattherewastosee。Amanwaspaintinguponthefence： \"EatBricklets—TheyFillYourFace。\" VioletblushedwhenshesawWilliamPry。Williamjabbedaladyinablacksilkraglanintheribs，kickedaboyintheshin，bitanoldgentlemanontheleftearandmanagedtocrowdnearertoViolet。Theystoodforanhourlookingatthemanpainttheletters。 ThenWilliam’slovecouldberepressednolonger。 Hetouchedheronthearm。 \"Comewithme，\"hesaid。\"IknowwherethereisabootblackwithoutanAdam’sapple。\" Shelookedupathimshyly，yetwithunmistakablelovetransfiguringhercountenance。 \"Andyouhavesaveditforme？\"sheasked，tremblingwiththefirstdimecstasyofawomanbe— loved。 Togethertheyhurriedtothebootblack’sstand。 Anhourtheyspenttheregazingatthemalformedyouth。 Awindow—cleanerfellfromthefifthstorytothesidewalkbesidethem。Astheambulancecameclang— ingupWilliampressedherhandjoyously。\"Fourribsatleastandacompoundfracture，\"hewhispered，swiftly。\"Youarenotsorrythatyoumetme，areyou，dearest？ \"Me？\"saidViolet，returningthepressure。\"Surenot。Icouldstandalldayrubberingwithyou。\" Theclimaxoftheromanceoccurredafewdayslater。PerhapsthereaderwillremembertheintenseexcitementintowhichthecitywasthrownwhenElizaJane，acoloredwoman，wasservedwithasubpoena。 TheRubberTribeencampedonthespot。WithhisownhandsWilliamPryplacedaboardupontwobeerkegsinthestreetoppositeElizaJane’sresidence。 HeandVioletsatthereforthreedaysandnights。 Thenitoccurredtoadetectivetoopenthedoorandservethesubpoena。Hesentforakinetoscopeanddidso。 Twosoulswithsuchcongenialtastescouldnotlongremainapart。Asapolicemandrovethemawaywithhisnightstickthateveningtheyplightedtheirtroth。 Theseedsoflovebadbeenwellsown，andhadgrownup，hardyandvigorous，intoa—letuscallitarub— berplant。 TheweddingofWilliamPryandVioletSeymourwassetforJune10。TheBigChurchintheMiddleoftheBlockwasbankedhighwithflowers。ThepopuloustribeofRubbererstheworldoverisram— pantoverweddings。Theyarethepessimistsofthepews。Theyaretheguyersofthegroomandthebanterersofthebride。Theycometolaughatyourmarriage，andshouldyouescapefromHymen’stoweronthebackofdeath’spalesteedtheywillcometothefuneralandsitinthesamepewandcryoveryourluck。Rubberwillstretch。 Thechurchwaslighted。Agrosgraincarpetlayovertheasphalttotheedgeofthesidewalk。Brides— maidswerepattingoneanother’ssashesawryandspeakingoftheBride’sfreckles。Coachmentiedwhiteribbonsontheirwhipsandbewailedthespaceoftimebetweendrinks。Theministerwasmusingoverhispossiblefee，essayingconjecturewhetheritwouldsufficetopurchaseanewbroadclothsuitforhimselfandaphotographofLauraJaneLibbeyforhiswife。Yea，Cupidwasintheair。 Andoutsidethechurch，oh，mybrothers，surgedandheavedtherankandfileofthetribeofRubberers。 intwobodiestheywere，withthegrosgraincarpetandcopswithclubsbetween。Theycrowdedlikecattle，theyfought，theypressedandsurgedandswayedandtrampledoneanothertoseeabitofagirlinawhiteveilacquirelicensetogothroughaman’spocketswhilebesleeps。 Butthehourfortheweddingcameandwent，andthebrideandbridegroomcamenot。Andimpatiencegavewaytoalarmandalarmbroughtaboutsearch，andtheywerenotfound。Andthentwobigpolice— mentookabandanddraggedoutofthefuriousmobofonlookersacrushedandtrampledthing，withaweddingringinitsvestpocketandashreddedandhystericalwomanbeatingherwaytothecarpet’sedge，ragged，bruisedandobstreperous。 WilliamPryandVioletSeymour，creaturesofhabit，hadjoinedintheseethinggameofthespecta— tors，unabletoresisttheoverwhelmingdesiretogazeuponthemselvesentering，asbrideandbridegroom，therose—deckedchurch。 Rubberwillout。 ONETHOUSANDDOLLARS \"Onethousanddollars，\"repeatedLawyerTolman，solemnlyandseverely，\"andhereisthemoney。\" YoungGilliangaveadecidedlyamusedlaughashefingeredthethinpackageofnewfifty—dollarnotes。 \"It’ssuchaconfoundedlyawkwardamount，\"heexplained，genially，tothelawyer。\"Ifithadbeententhousandafellowmightwindupwithalotoffireworksanddohimselfcredit。Evenfiftydollarswouldhavebeenlesstrouble。\" \"Youheardthereadingofyouruncle’swill，\"con— tinuedLawyerTolman，professionallydryinhistones。\"Idonotknowifyoupaidmuchattentiontoitsdetails。Imustremindyouofone。Youarerequiredtorendertousanaccountofthemannerofexpenditureofthis$1，000assoonasyouhavedis— posedofit。Thewillstipulatesthat。ItrustthatyouwillsofarcomplywiththelateMr。Gillian’swishes。\" \"Youmaydependuponit，\"saidtheyoungman。% politely，\"inspiteoftheextraexpenseitwillentail。 Imayhavetoengageasecretary。Iwasnevergoodataccounts。\" Gillianwenttohisclub。TherebehuntedoutonewhomhecalledOldBryson。 OldBrysonwascalmandfortyandsequestered。 Hewasinacornerreadingabook，andwhenhesawGillianapproachinghesighed，laiddownhisbookandtookoffhisglasses。 \"OldBryson，wakeup，\"saidGillian。\"I’veafunnystorytotellyou。\" \"Iwishyouwouldtellittosomeoneinthebilliardroom，\"saidOldBryson。\"YouknowhowIhateyourstories。\" \"Thisisabetteronethanusual，\"saidGillian，rollingacigarette;\"andI’mgladtotellittoyou。 It’stoosadandfunnytogowiththerattlingofbilliardbars。I’vejustcomefrommylateuncle’sfirmoflegalcorsairs。Heleavesmeaneventhou— sanddollars。Now，whatcanamanpossiblydowithathousanddollars？\" \"Ithought，\"saidOldBryson，showingasmuchinterestasabeeshowsinavinegarcruet，\"thatthelateSeptimusGillianwasworthsomethinglikehalfamillion。\" \"Hewas，\"assentedGillian，joyously，\"andthat’swherethejokecomesin。He’slefthiswholecargoofdoubloonstoamicrobe。Thatis，partofitgoestothemanwhoinventsanewbacillusandtheresttoes— tablishahospitalfordoingawaywithitagain。 Thereareoneortwotriflingbequestsontheside。 —thebutlerandthehousekeepergetasealringand$10each。Hisnephewgets$1，000。\" \"You’vealwayshadplentyofmoneytospend，\" observedOldBryson。 \"Tons，\"saidGillian。\"Unclewasthefairygod— motherasfarasanallowancewasconcerned。\" \"Anyotherheirs？\"askedOldBryson。 \"None。\"Gillianfrownedathiscigaretteandkickedtheupholsteredleatherofadivanuneasily。 ThereisaMissHayden，awardofmyuncle，wholivedinhishouse。She’saquietthing—musical— thedaughterofsomebodywhowasunluckyenoughtobehisfriend。Iforgottosaythatshewasinonthesealringand$10joke，too。IwishIhadbeen。 ThenIcouldhavehadtwobottlesofbrut，tippedthewaiterwiththeringandhadthewholebusinessoffmybands。Don’tbesuperiorandinsulting，OldBry— son—tellmewhatafellowcandowithathousanddollars。\" OldBrysonrubbedhisglassesandsmiled。AndwhenOldBrysonsmiled，Gillianknewthatbein— tendedtobemoreoffensivethanever。 \"Athousanddollars，\"liesaid，\"meansmuchorlittle。OnemanmaybuyahappyhomewithitandlaughatRockefeller。AnothercouldsendhiswifeSouthwithitandsaveherlife。AthousanddollarswouldbuypuremilkforonehundredbabiesduringJune，July，andAugustandsavefiftyoftheirlives。 Youcouldcountuponahalfhour’sdiversionwithitatfaroinoneofthefortifiedartgalleries。Itwouldfurnishaneducationtoanambitiousboy。IamtoldthatagenuineCorotwassecuredforthatamountinanauctionroomyesterday。YoucouldmovetoaNewHampshiretownandliverespectablytwoyearsonit。YoucouldrentMadisonSquareGardenforoneeveningwithit，andlectureyouraudience，ifyoushouldhaveone，ontheprecariousnessofthepro— fessionofheirpresumptive。\" \"Peoplemightlikeyou，OldBryson，\"saidGillian，alwaysunruffled，\"ifyouwouldn’tmoralize。IaskedyoutotellmewhatIcoulddowithathousanddollars。\" \"You？\"saidBryson，withagentlelaugh。 \"Why，BobbyGillian，there’sonlyonelogicalthingyoucoulddo。YoucangobuyMissLottaLauriereadiamondpendantwiththemoney，andthentakeyourselfofftoIdahoandinflict，yourpresenceuponaranch。Iadviseasheepranch，asIhaveaparticulardislikeforsheep。\" \"Thanks，\"saidGillian，rising，\"IthoughtI coulddependuponyou，OldBryson。You’vehitontheveryscheme。Iwantedtochuckthemoneyinalump，forI’vegottoturninanaccountforit，andIhateitemizing。\" Gillianphonedforacabandsaidtothedriver： \"ThestageentranceoftheColumbineTheatre。\"— MissLottaLaurierewasassistingnaturewithapowderpuff，almostreadyforhercallatacrowdedMatinee，whenherdressermentionedthenameofMr。 Gillian。 \"Letitin，\"saidMissLauriere。\"Now，whatisit，Bobby？I’mgoingonintwominutes。\" \"Rabbit—footyourrightearalittle，\"suggestedGillian，critically。\"That’sbetter。Itwon’ttaketwominutesforme。Whatdoyousaytoalittlethinginthependantline？Icanstandthreecipherswithafigureoneinfrontof’em。\" \"Oh，justasyousay，\"carolledMissLauriere。 myrightglove，Adams。Say，Bobby，didyouseethatnecklaceDellaStaceyhadontheothernight？ Twenty—twohundreddollarsitcostatTiffany’s。 But，ofcourse—pullmysashalittletotheleft，Adams。\" \"MissLaurierefortheopeningchorus！\"criedthecallboywithout。 Gillianstrolledouttowherehiscabwaswaiting。 \"Whatwouldyoudowithathousanddollarsifyouhadit？\"beaskedthedriver。