第6章

\"Someofthepapershavedonegoodworkinthatline。There’stheMorningMars，forinstance。Itwarmeduptwoorthreetrails，andgotthemanafterthepolicehadlet’emgetcold。\" \"I’llshowyou，\"saidTiernan，rising，andexpand— inghischest。\"I’llshowyouwhatIthinkofnews— papersingeneral，andyourMorningMarsinpar— ticular。\" Threefeetfromtheirtablewasthetelephonebooth。Kernanwentinsideandsatattheinstrument，leavingthedooropen。Hefoundanumberinthebook，tookdownthereceiverandmadehisdemanduponCentral。Woodssatstill，lookingatthesneer— ing，cold，vigilantfacewaitingclosetothetrans— mitter，andlistenedtothewordsthatcamefromthethin，truculentlipscurvedintoacontemptuoussmile。 \"ThattheMorningMars？……Iwanttospeaktothemanagingeditor……Why，tellhimit’ssomeonewhowantstotalktohimabouttheNorcrossmurder。 \"Youtheeditor？……Allright……I amthemanwhokilledoldNorcross……Wait！ Holdthewire;I’mnottheusualcrank……oh，thereisn’ttheslightestdanger。I’vejustbeendis— cussingitwithadetectivefriendofmine。Ikilledtheoldmanat2：30A。M。twoweeksagoto— morrow……Haveadrinkwithyou？Now，hadn’tyoubetterleavethatkindoftalktoyourfunnyman？Can’tyoutellwhetheraman’sguyingyouorwhetheryou’rebeingofferedthebiggestscoopyourdulldishragofapapereverhad？…… Well，that’sso;it’sabobtailscoop——butyoucanhardlyexpectmeto’phoneinmynameandaddress……Why？Oh，becauseIbeardyoumakeaspecialtyofsolvingmysteriouscrimesthatstumpthepolice……No，that’snotall。Iwanttotellyouthatyourrotten，lying，pennysheetisofnomoreuseintrackinganintelligentmurdererorhighway— manthanablindpoodlewouldbe……What？……Oh，no，thisisn’tarivalnewspaperoffice; you’regettingitstraight。IdidtheNorcrossjob，andI’vegotthejewelsinmysuitcaseat——’thenameofthehotelcouldnotbelearned’——yourecog— nizethatphrase，don’tyou？Ithoughtso。You’veuseditoftenenough。Kindofrattlesyou，doesn’tit，tohavethemysteriousvillaincallupyourgreat，big，all—powerfulorganofrightandjusticeandgoodgovernmentandtellyouwhatahelplessoldgas—bagyouare？……Cutthatout;you’renotthatbigafool——no，youdon’tthinkI’mafraud。Icantellitbyyourvoice……Now，listen，andI’llgiveyouapointerthatwillproveittoyou。Ofcourseyou’vehadthismurdercaseworkedoverbyyourstaffofbrightyoungblockheads。Halfofthesecondbut— tononoldMrs。Norcross’snightgownisbrokenoff。 IsawitwhenItookthegarnetringoffherfinger。 Ithoughtitwasaruby……——Stopthat！itwon’twork。\" KernanturnedtoWoodswithadiabolicsmile。 \"I’vegothimgoing。Hebelievesmenow。Hedidn’tquitecoverthetransmitterwithhishandwhenhetoldsomebodytocallupCentralonanother’phoneandgetournumber。I’llgivehimjustonemoredig，andthenwe’llmakea’get—away。’ \"Hello！……Yes。I’mhereyet。Youdidn’tthink——I’drunfromsuchalittlesubsidized，turn— coatragofanewspaper，didyou？……Havemeinsideofforty—eighthours？Say，willyouquitbeingfunny？Now，youletgrownmenaloneandat— tendtoyourbusinessofhuntingupdivorcecasesandstreet—caraccidentsandprintingthefilthandscandalthatyoumakeyourlivingby。Good—by，oldboy——sorryIhaven’ttimetocallonyou。I’dfeelperfectlysafeinyoursanctumasinorum。Tra—la！\" \"He’sasmadasacatthat’slostamouse，\"saidKernan，hangingupthereceiverandcomingout。 \"Andnow，Barney，myboy，we’llgotoashowandenjoyourselvesuntilareasonablebedtime。Fourhours’sleepforme，andthenthewest—bound。\" ThetwodinedinaBroadwayrestaurant。Kernanwaspleasedwithhimself。Hespentmoneylikeaprinceoffiction。Andthenaweirdandgorgeousmusicalcomedyengagedtheirattention。Afterwardtherewasalatesupperinagrillroom，withchampagne，andKernanattheheightofhiscom— placency。 Half—pastthreeinthemorningfoundtheminacornerofanall—nightcafe，Kernanstillboastinginavapidandramblingway，Woodsthinkingmoodilyovertheendthathadcometohisusefulnessasanupholderofthelaw。 But，ashepondered，hiseyebrightenedwithaspeculativelight。 \"Iwonderifit’spossible，\"besaidtohimself，\"I won—derifit’spos—si—ble！ Andthenoutsidethecafethecomparativestillnessoftheearlymorningwaspuncturedbyfaint，uncer— taincriesthatseemedmerefirefliesofsound，somegrowinglouder，somefainter，waxingandwaningamidtherumbleofmilkwagonsandinfrequentcars。 Shrillcriestheywerewhennear——well—knowncriesthatconveyedmanymeaningstotheearsofthoseoftheslumberingmillionsofthegreatcitywhowakedtohearthem。Criesthatboreupontheirsignificant，smallvolumetheweightofaworld’swoeandlaugh— teranddelightandstress。Tosome，coweringbe— neaththeprotectionofanight’sephemeralcover，theybroughtnewsofthehideous，brightday;toothers，wrappedinhappysleep，theyannouncedamorningthatwoulddawnblackerthansablenight。 Tomanyoftherichtheybroughtabesomtosweepawaywhathadbeentheirswhilethestarsshone;tothepoortheybrought——anotherday。 Alloverthecitythecrieswerestartingup，keenandsonorous，heraldingthechancesthattheslip— pingofonecogwheelinthemachineryoftimehadmade;apportioningtothesleeperswhiletheylayatthemercyoffate，thevengeance，profit，grief，rewardanddoomthatthenewfigureinthecalen— darhadbroughtthem。Shrillandyetplaintivewerethecries，asiftheyoungvoicesgrievedthatsomuchevilandsolittlegoodwasintheirirresponsiblehands。Thusechoedinthestreetsofthehelplesscitythetransmissionofthelatestdecreesofthegods，thecriesofthenewsboys——theClarionCallofthePress。 Woodsflippedadimetothewaiter，andsaid： \"GetmeaMorningMars。\" Whenthepapercameheglancedatitsfirstpage，andthentorealeafoutofhismemorandumbookandbegantowriteonitwiththelittleoldpencil。 \"What’sthenews？\"’yawnedKernan。 Woodsflippedovertohimthepieceofwriting： \"TheNewYorkMorningMars： \"PleasepaytotheorderofJohnKernantheonethousanddollarsrewardcomingtomeforhisarrestandconviction。 \"BARNARDWOODS。\" \"Ikindofthoughttheywoulddothat，\"saidWoods，\"whenyouwerejollyingthemsohard。Now，Johnny，you’llcometothepolicestationwithme。\" EXTRADITEDFROMBOHEMIA FromnearthevillageofHarmony，atthefootoftheGreenMountains，cameMissMedoraMartintoNewYorkwithhercolor—boxandeasel。 MissMedoraresembledtherosewhichtheautum— nalfrostshadsparedthelongestofallhersisterblossoms。InHarmony，whenshestartedalonetothewickedcitytostudyart，theysaidshewasamad，reckless，headstronggirl。InNewYork，whenshefirsttookherseatataWestSideboardinghousetable，theboardersasked：\"Whoisthenice—lookingoldmaid？\" Medoratookheart，acheaphallbedroomandtwoartlessonsaweekfromProfessorAngelini，aretiredbarberwhohadstudiedhisprofessioninaHarlemdancingacademy。Therewasnoonetosetherright，forhereinthebigcitytheydoituntoallofus。 Howmanyofusarebadlyshaveddailyandtaughtthetwo—stepimperfectlybyex—pupilsofBastienLePageandGerome？ThemostpatheticsightinNewYork——exceptthemannersoftherush—hourcrowds——isthedrearymarchofthehopelessarmyofMe— diocrity。HereArtisnobenignantgoddess，butaCircewhoturnsherwooersintomewingTomsandTabbieswholingeraboutthedoorstepsofherabode，unmindfuloftheflyingbrickbatsandboot—jacksofthecritics。Someofuscreepbacktoournativevil— lagestotheskim—milkof\"Itoldyouso\";butmostofusprefertoremaininthecoldcourtyardofourmistress’stemple，snatchingthescrapsthatfallfromherdivinetabled’hote。Butsomeofusgrowwearyatlastofthefruitlessservice。Andthentherearetwofatesopentous。Wecangetajobdrivingagrocer’swagon，orwecangetswallowedupintheVortexofBohemia。Thelattersoundsgood;buttheformerreallypansoutbetter。For，whenthegrocerpaysusoffwecanrentadresssuitand——thecap— italizedsystemofhumordescribesitbest——GetBo— hemiaOntheRun。 MissMedorachosetheVortexandtherebyfur— nishesuswithourlittlestory。 ProfessorAngelinipraisedhersketchesexcessively。 Oncewhenshehadmadeaneatstudyofahorse— chestnuttreeintheparkhedeclaredshewouldbe— comeasecondRosaBonheur。Again——agreatart— isthashismoods——hewouldsaycruelandcuttingthings。Forexample，Medorahadspentanafter— noonpatientlysketchingthestatueandthearchi— tectureatColumbusCircle。Tossingitasidewithasneer，theprofessorinformedherthatGiottohadoncedrawnaperfectcirclewithonesweepofhishand。 Onedayitrained，theweeklyremittancefromHar— monywasoverdue，Medorahadaheadache，thepro— fessorhadtriedtoborrowtwodollarsfromher，herartdealerhadsentbackallherwater—colorsunsold，and——Mr。Binkleyaskedherouttodinner。 Mr。Binkleywasthegayboyoftheboarding— house。Hewasforty—nine，andownedafishstallinadowntownmarket。Butaftersixo’clockheworeaneveningsuitandwhoopedthingsupconnectedwiththebeauxarts。Theyoungmensaidhewasan\"Indian。\"HewassupposedtobeanaccomplishedhabitueoftheinnercirclesofBohemia。Itwasnosecretthathehadonceloaned$10toayoungmanwhohadhadadrawingprintedinPuck。Oftenhasonethusobtainedhisentreeintothecharmedcircle，whiletheotherobtainedbothhisentreeandroast。 TheotherboardersenviouslyregardedMedoraassheleftatMr。Binkley’ssideatnineo’clock。Shewasassweetasaclusterofdriedautumngrassesinherpaleblue——oh——er——thatverythinstuff——inherpaleblueComstockizedsilkwaistandbox— pleatedvoileskirt，withasoftpinkglowonherthincheeksandthetiniestbitofrougepowderonherface，withherhandkerchiefandroomkeyinherbrownwalrus，pebble—grainband—bag。 AndMr。Binkleylookedimposinganddashingwithhisredfaceandgraymustache，andhistightdresscoat，thatmadethebackofhisneckrollupjustlikeasuccessfulnovelist’s。 TheydroveinacabtotheCafeTerence，justoffthemostglitteringpartofBroadway，which，aseveryoneknows，isoneofthemostpopularandwidelypatronized，jealouslyexclusiveBohemianre— sortsinthecity。 DownbetweentherowsoflittletablestrippedMedora，oftheGreenMountains，afterherescort。 Thriceinalifetimemaywomanwalkuponcloudsoncewhenshetrippethtothealtar，oncewhenshefirstentersBohemianhalls，thelastwhenshemarchesbackacrossherfirstgardenwiththedeadhenofherneighborinherband。 Therewasatableset，withthreeorfouraboutit。 Awaiterbuzzedarounditlikeabee，andsilverandglassshoneuponit。And，preliminarytothemeal，astheprehistoricgranitestrataheraldedthepro— tozoa，thebreadofGaul，compoundedafterthefor— mulaoftherecipefortheeternalbills，wastheresetforthtothehandandtoothofalong—sufferingcity，whilethegodslaybesidetheirnectarandhome—madebiscuitsandsmiled，andthedentistsleapedforjoyintheirgold—leafydens。 TheeyeofBinkleyfixedayoungmanathistablewiththeBobemiangleam，whichisacompoundofthelookoftheBasilisk，theshineofabubbleofWurzburger，theinspirationofgeniusandtheplead— ingofapanhandler。 Theyoungmansprangtohisfeet。\"Hello，Bink，oldboy！beshouted。\"Don’ttellmeyouwerego— ingtopassourtable。Joinus——unlessyou’vean— othercrowdonhand。\" \"Don’tmind，oldchap，\"saidBinkley，ofthefish— stall。\"YouknowhowIliketobuttupagainstthefinearts。Mr。Vandyke——Mr。Madder——er—— MissMartin，oneoftheelectalsoinart——er——\" Theintroductionwentaround。TherewerealsoMissEliseandMiss’Toinette。Perhapstheyweremodels，fortheychatteredoftheSt。Regisdecora— tionsandHenryJames——andtheydiditnotbadly。 Medorasatintransport。Music——wild，intoxi— eatingmusicmadebytroubadoursdirectfromarearbasementroominElysium——setherthoughtstodancing。Herewasaworldneverbeforepenetratedbyherwarmestimaginationoranyofthelinescon— trolledbyHarriman。WiththeGreenMountains’ externalcalmuponhershesat，hersoulflaminginherwiththefireofAndalusia。ThetableswerefilledwithBohemia。Theroomwasfullofthefragranceofflowers——bothmilleandcauli。Questionsandcorkspopped;laughterandsilverrang;champagneflashedinthepail，witflashedinthepan。 Vandykeruffledhislong，blacklocks，disarrangedhiscarelesstieandleanedovertoMadder。 \"Say，Maddy，\"hewhispered，feelingly，\"some— timesI’mtemptedtopaythisPhilistinehistendol— larsandgetridofhim。\" Madderruffledhislong，sandylocksanddisar— rangedhiscarelesstie。 \"Don’tthinkofit，Vandy，\"hereplied。\"Weareshort，andArtislong。\" Medoraatestrangeviandsanddrankelderberrywinethattheypouredinherglass。ItwasjustthecolorofthatintheVermonthome。Thewaiterpouredsomethinginanotherglassthatseemedtobeboiling，butwhenshetastedititwasnothot。 Shehadneverfeltsolight—heartedbefore。ShethoughtlovinglyoftheGreenMountainfarmanditsfauna。Sheleaned，smiling，toMissElise。 \"IfIwereathome，\"shesaid，beamingly，\"I couldshowyouthecutestlittlecalf！\" \"NothingforyouintheWhiteLane，\"saidMissElise。\"Whydon’tyoupad？ TheorchestraplayedawailingwaltzthatMedorahadlearnedfromthehand—organs。Shefollowedtheairwithnoddingheadinasweetsopranohum。 Madderlookedacrossthetableather，andwonderedinwhatstrangewatersBinkleyhadcaughtherinhisseine。Shesmiledathim，andtheyraisedglassesanddrankofthewinethatboiledwhenitwascold。 Binkleyhadabandonedartandwaspratingoftheunusualspringcatchofshad。MissElisearrangedthepalette—and—maul—sticktiepinofMr。Vandyke。 APhilistineatsomedistanttablewasmaunderingvolublyeitheraboutJeromeorGerome。Afamousactresswasdiscoursingexcitablyaboutmonogrammedhosiery。Ahoseclerkfromadepartmentstorewasloudlyproclaiminghisopinionsofthedrama。A writerwasabusingDickens。Amagazineeditorandaphotographerweredrinkingadrybrandatare— servedtable。A36—25—42youngladywassayingtoaneminentsculptor：\"FudgeforyourPraxItalys！ BringoneofyourVenusAnnoDominisdowntoCohen’sandseebowquickshe’dbeturneddownforacloakmodel。BacktothequarrieswithyourGreeksandDagos！\" ThuswentBohemia。 AtelevenMr。BinkleytookMedoratotheboard— ing—bouseandlefther，withasocietybow，atthefootofthehallstairs。Shewentuptoherroomandlitthegas。 Andthen，assuddenlyasthedreadfulgeniearoseinvaporfromthecoppervaseofthefisherman，aroseinthatroomtheformidableshapeoftheNewEnglandConscience。TheterriblethingthatMedorahaddonewasrevealedtoherinitsfullenormity。Shehadsatinthepresenceoftheun— godlyandlookeduponthewinebothwhenitwasredandeffervescent。 Atmidnightshewrotethisletter： \"Mr。BERLAHHOSKINS，Harmony，Vermont。 \"DearSir：Henceforth，considermeasdeadtoyouforever。Ihavelovedyoutoowelltoblightyourcareerbybringingintoitmyguiltyandsin—stainedlife。IhavesuccumbedtotheinsidiouswilesofthiswickedworldandhavebeendrawnintothevortexofBohemia。ThereisscarcelyanydepthofglitteringiniquitythatIhavenotsounded。Itishopelesstocombatmydecision。ThereisnorisingfromthedepthstowhichIhavesunk。Endeavortoforgetme。IamlostforeverinthefairbutbrutalmazeofawfulBohemia。Farewell。 \"ONCEYOURMEDORA。\" OnthenextdayMedoraformedherresolutions。 Beelzebub，flungfromheaven，wasnomorecastdown。 BetweenherandtheappleblossomsofHarmonytherewasafixedgulf。Flamingcherubimwardedherfromthegatesofherlostparadise。Inoneevening，bytheaidofBinkleyandMumm，Bohemiahadgatheredherintoitsawfulmidst。 Thereremainedtoherbutonething——alifeofbrilliant，butirremediableerror。Vermontwasashrinethatsheneverwoulddaretoapproachagain。 Butshewouldnotsink——thereweregreatandcom— pellingonesinhistoryuponwhomshewouldmodelhermeteoriccareer——Camille，LolaMontez，RoyalMary，Zaza——suchanameasoneofthesewouldthatofMedoraMartinbetofuturegenerationsFortwodaysMedorakeptherroom。OnthethirdsheopenedamagazineattheportraitoftheKingofBelgium，andlaughedsardonically。Ifthatfar—famedbreakerofwomen’sheartsshouldcrossherpath，hewouldhavetobowbeforehercoldandim— periousbeauty。Shewouldnotsparetheoldortheyoung。AllAmerica——allEuropeshoulddohomagetohersinister，butcompellingcharm。 Asyetshecouldnotbeartothinkofthelifeshehadoncedesired——apeacefuloneintheshadowoftheGreenMountainswithBeriahatherside，andordersforexpensiveoilpaintingscominginbyeachmailfromNewYork。Heronefatalmisstephadshatteredthatdream。 OnthefourthdayMedorapowderedherfaceandrougedherlips。OnceshehadseenCarterin\"Zaza。\"Shestoodbeforethemirrorinarecklessattitudeandcried：\"Zut！zut！\"Sherhymeditwith\"nut，\"butwiththelawlesswordHarmonyseemedtopassawayforever。TheVortexhadher。 ShebelongedtoBohemiaforevermore。AndneverwouldBeriah—— ThedooropenedandBeriahwalkedin。 \"’Dory，\"saidhe，\"what’sallthatchalkandpinkstuffonyourface，honey？ Medoraextendedanarm。 \"Toolate，\"shesaid，solemnly。Thedieiscast。 Ibelonginanotherworld。Cursemeifyouwill—— itisyourright。Go，andleavemeinthepathI havechosen。Bidthemallathomenevertomen— tionmynameagain。Andsometimes，Beriah，prayformewhenIamrevellinginthegaudy，buthol— low，pleasuresofBohemia。\" \"Getatowel，’Dory，\"saidBeriah，\"andwipethatpaintoffyourface。IcameassoonasIgotyourletter。Thempicturesofyoursain’tamount— ingtoanything。I’vegotticketsforbothofusbackontheeveningtrain。Hurryandgetyourthingsinyourtrunk。\" \"Fatewastoostrongforme，Beriah。GowhileIamstrongtobearit。\" \"Howdoyoufoldthiseasel，’Dory？——nowbegintopack，sowehavetimetoeatbeforetraintime。 Themaplesisalloutinfull—grownleaves，’Dory—— youjustoughttosee’em！ \"Notthisearly，Beriah？ \"Yououghttosee’em，’Dory;they’relikeanoceanofgreeninthemorningsunlight。\" \"Oh，Beriah！\" Onthetrainshesaidtohimsuddenly： \"Iwonderwhyyoucamewhenyougotmylet— ter。\" \"Oh，shucks！\"saidBeriah。\"Didyouthinkyoucouldfoolme？HowcouldyouberunawaytothatBohemiacountrylikeyousaidwhenyourletterwaspostmarkedNewYorkasplainasday？\" APHILISTINEINBOHEMIA GeorgeWashington，withhisrightarmup— raised，sitshisironhorseatthelowercornerofUnionSquare，foreversignalingtheBroadwaycarstostopastheyroundthecurveintoFourteenthStreet。Butthecarsbuzzon，heedless，astheydoatthebeckofaprivatecitizen，andthegreatGeneralmustfeel，unlesshisnervesareiron，thatrapidtran— sitgloriamundi。 ShouldtheGeneralraisehislefthandashehasraisedhisrightitwouldpointtoaquarterofthecitythatformsahavenfortheoppressedandsup— pressedofforeignlands。Inthecauseofnationalorpersonalfreedomtheyhavefoundarefugehere，andthepatriotwhomadeitforthemsitshissteed，overlookingtheirdistrict，whilehelistensthroughhisleftcartovaudevillethatcaricaturestheposterityofhisproteges。Italy，Poland，theformerSpanishpossessionsandthepolyglottribesofAustria—Hun— garyhavespilledhereathicklatheroftheireffer— vescentsons。Intheeccentriccafesandlodging— housesofthevicinitytheyhoverovertheirnativewinesandpoliticalsecrets。Thecolonychangeswithmuchfrequency。Facesdisappearfromthehauntstobereplacedbyothers。Whitherdotheseuneasybirdsflit？Forhalfoftheanswerobservecarefullythesuaveforeignairandforeigncourtesyofthenextwaiterwhoservesyourtabled’hote。 Fortheotherhalf，perhapsifthebarbershopshadtongues（andwhowilldisputeit？）theycouldtelltheirshare。 Titlesareasplentifulasfingerringsamongthesetransitoryexiles。ForlackofproperexploitationastockoftitledgoodslargeenoughtosupplythetradeofupperFifthAvenueisherecondemnedtoamerepushcarttraffic。Thenew—worldlandlordswhoen— tertaintheseoffshootsofnobilityarenotdazzledbycoronetsandcrests。Theyhavedoughnutstosellinsteadofdaughters。Withthemitisaseriousmatteroftradinginflourandsugarinsteadofpearlpowderandbonbons。 Theseassertionsaredeemedfittingasanintro— ductiontothetale，whichisofplebeiansandcontainsnoonewitheventheghostofatitle。 KatyDempsey’smotherkeptafurnished—roomhouseinthisoasisofthealiens。Thebusinesswasnotprofitable。Ifthetwoscrapedtogetherenoughtomeetthelandlord’sagentonrentdayandnego— tiatefortheingredientsofadailyIrishstewtheycalleditsuccess。Oftenthestewlackedbothmeatandpotatoes。Sometimesitbecameasbadascon— somme’withmusic。 InthismouldyoldhouseKatywaxedplumpandpertandwholesomeandasbeautifulandfreckledasatigerlily。ShewasthegoodfairywhowasguiltyofplacingthedampcleantowelsandcrackedpitchersoffreshlylaunderedCrotoninthelodgers’rooms。 Youareinformed（byvirtueoftheprivilegesofastronomicaldiscovery）thatthestarlodger’snamewasMr。Brunelli。Hiswearingayellowtieandpay— inghisrentpromptlydistinguishedhimfromtheotherlodgers。Hisraimentwassplendid，hiscom— plexionolive，his，mustachefierce，hismannersaprince’s，hisringsandpinsasmagnificentasthoseofatravelingdentist。 Hehadbreakfastservedinhisroom，andheateitinareddressinggownwithgreentassels。Heleftthehouseatnoonandreturnedatmidnight。Thoseweremysterioushours，buttherewasnothingmy— teriousaboutMrs。Dempsey’slodgersexceptthethingsthatwerenotmysterious。OneofMr。Kip— ling’spoemsisaddressedto\"Yewhoholdtheun— writtencluetoallsaveallunwrittenthing。\"Thesame\"readers\"areinvitedtotackletheforegoingassertion。 Mr。Brunelli，beingimpressionableandaLatin，felltoconjugatingtheverb\"amare，\"withKatyintheobjectivecase，thoughnotbecauseofantipathy。 Shetalkeditoverwithhermother。 \"Sure，Ilikehim，\"saidKaty。\"He’smorepo— litenessthantwintycandidatesforAlderman，andliemakesmefeellikeaqueenwhinhewalksatmeside。 Butwhatishe，Idinno？I’vemesuspicions。Themarnin’llcoomwhinhe’llthrotoutthepictureavhisbaronialhallsandaxtohavetheweek’srinthungupintheicechistalongwidalltheristof’em。\" \"’Tistrue，\"admittedMrs。Dempsey，\"thatheseemstobeasortivaDago，andtoocoolchuredinhisspacheforaralegentleman。Butyemaybemis— judgin’him。Yeshouldniversuspectanywanofbein’ofnobledescintthatpayscashandpathronizesthelaundryrig’lar。\" \"He’sthesametbricksofspakin’andblarneyin’ widhishands，\"sighedKaty，\"astheFrinchnoble— manatMrs。Toole’sthatranawaywidMr。Toole’sSundaypantsandleftthephotographoftheBastile，hisgrandfather’schat—taw，assecurityfortinweeks’ rint。\" Mr。Brunellicontinuedhiscalorificwooing。Katycontinuedtohesitate。Onedayheaskedherouttodineandshefeltthatadenouementwasintheair。 Whiletheyareontheirway，withKatyinherbestmuslin，youmusttakeasanentr’acteabriefpeepatNewYork’sBohemia。 ’Tonio’srestaurantisinBohemia。Theverylo— cationofitissecret。Ifyouwishtoknowwhereitisaskthefirstpersonyoumeet。Hewilltellyouinawhisper。’Toniodiscountenancescustom;hekeepshishouse—frontblackandforbidding;hegivesyouaprettybaddinner;helockshisdooratthedininghour;butheknowsspaghettiastheboarding—houseknowscoldveal;and——hehasdepositedmanydol— larsinacertainBancodi——somethingwithmanygoldvowelsinthenameonitswindows。 TothisrestaurantMr。BrunelliconductedKaty。 Thehousewasdarkandtheshadeswerelowered;butMr。Brunellitouchedanelectricbuttonbythebase— mentdoor，andtheywereadmitted。 Alongalong，dark，narrowhallwaytheywentandthenthroughashiningandspotlesskitchenthatopeneddirectlyuponabackyard。 Thewallsofhouseshemmedthreesidesoftheyard;ahigh，boardfence，surroundedbycats，theother。Awashofclotheswassuspendedhighuponalinestretchedfromdiagonalcorners。Thosewerepropertyclothes，andwerenevertakeninby’Tonio。 Theyweretherethatwitswithdefectivepronuncia— tionmightmakepunsinconnectionwiththeragout。 AdozenandahalflittletablessetuponthebaregroundwerecrowdedwithBohemia—hunters，whoflockedtherebecause’Toniopretendednottowantthemandpretendedtogivethemagooddinner。 TherewasasprinklingofrealBohemianspresentwhocameforachangebecausetheyweretiredoftherealBohemia，andasmartshowerofthemenwhooriginatethebrightsayingsofCongressmenandthelittlenephewofthewell—knowngeneralpassen— geragentoftheEvansvilleandTerreHauteRail— roadCompany。 Hereisabonmotthatwasmanufacturedat’Tonio’s： \"Adinnerat’Tonio’s，\"saidaBohemian，\"alwaysamountstotwicethepricethatisaskedforit。\" Letusassumethatanaccommodatingvoicein— quires： \"Howso？\" \"Thedinnercostsyou40cents;yougive10centstothewaiter，anditmakesyoufeellike30cents。\" Mostofthedinerswereconfirmedtabled’hoters—— gastronomicadventuress，foreverseekingtheElDo— radoofagoodclaret，andconsistentlycomingtogriefinCalifornia。 Mr。BrunelliescortedKatytoalittletableem— boweredwithshrubberyintubs，andaskedhertoexcusehimforawhile。 Katysat，enchantedbyascenesobrillianttoher。 Thegrandladies，insplendiddressesandplumesandsparklingrings;thefinegentlemenwholaughedsoloudly，thecriesof\"Garsong！\"and\"We，mon— seer，\"and\"Hello，Mame！\"thatdistinguishBo— hemia;thelivelychatter，thecigarettesmoke，theinterchangeofbrightsmilesandeye—glances——allthisdisplayandmagnificenceoverpoweredthedaugh— terofMrs。Dempseyandheldhermotionless。 Mr。Brunellisteppedintotheyardandseemedtospreadhissmileandbowovertheentirecompany。 Andeverywheretherewasagreatclappingofbandsandafewcriesof\"Bravo！\"and\"’Tonio！’Tonio！\" whateverthosewordsmightmean。Ladieswavedtheirnapkinsathim，gentlemenalmosttwistedtheirnecksoff，tryingtocatchhisnod。 WhentheovationwasconcludedMr。Brunelli，withafinalbow，steppednimblyintothekitchenandflungoffhiscoatandwaistcoat。 \"Flaherty，thenimblest\"garsong\"amongthewaiters，hadbeenassignedtothespecialserviceofKaty。Shewasalittlefaintfromhunger，fortheIrishstewontheDempseytablehadbeenparticu— larlyweakthatday。Deliciousodorsfromunknowndishestantalizedher。AndFlahertybegantobringtohertablecourseaftercourseofambrosialfoodthatthegodsmighthavepronouncedexcellent。 ButeveninthemidstofherLucullianrepastKatylaiddownherknifeandfork。Herheartsankaslead，andatearfelluponherfiletmignon。Herhauntingsuspicionsofthestarlodgeraroseagain，fourfold。Thuscourtedandadmiredandsmileduponbythatfashionableandgraciousassembly，whatelsecouldMr。Brunellibebutoneofthosedazzlingtitledpatricians，gloriousofnamebutshyofrentmoney，concerningwhomexperiencehadmadeherwise？Withasenseofhisineligibilitygrowingwithinhertherewasmingledatorturingconvictionthathispersonalitywasbecomingmorepleasingtoherdaybyday。Andwhyhadhelefthertodinealone？ Butherehewascomingagain，nowcoatless，hissnowyshirt—sleevesrolledhighabovehisJeffries— onianelbows，awhiteyachtingcappercheduponhisjettycurls。 \"’Tonio！’Tonio！\"shoutedmany，and\"Thespaghetti！Thespaghetti！\"shoutedtherest。 Neverat’Tonio’sdidawaiterdaretoserveadishofspaghettiuntil’Toniocametotestit，toprovethesauceandaddtheneedfuldashofseasoningthatgaveitperfection。 Fromtabletotablemoved’Tonio，likeaprinceinhispalace，greetinghisguests。White，jewelledbandssignalledhimfromeveryside。 Aglassofwinewiththisoneandthat，smilesforall，ajestandreparteeforanythatmightchallenge——trulyfewprincescouldbesoagreeableahost！ Andwhatartistcouldaskforfurtherappreciationofhishandiwork？KatydidnotknowthattheproudestconsummationofaNewYorker’sambitionistoshakebandswithaspaghettichefortoreceiveanodfromaBroadwayhead—waiter。 Atlastthecompanythinned，leaving’butafewcouplesandquartetteslingeringovernewwineandoldstories。AndthencameMr。BrunellitoKaty’ssecludedtable，anddrewachairclosetohers。 Katysmiledathimdreamily。ShewaseatingthelastspoonfulofaraspberryrollwithBurgundysauce。 \"Youhaveseen！\"saidMr。Brunelli，layingonehanduponhiscollarbone。\"IamAntonioBrunelli！ Yes;Iamthegreat’Tonio！Youhavenotsuspectthat！Iloaveyou，Katy，andyoushallmarrywithme。Isitnotso？Callme’Antonio，’andsaythatyouwillbemine。\" Katy’sheaddroopedtotheshoulderthatwasnowfreedfromallsuspicionofhavingreceivedtheknightlyaccolade。 \"Oh，Andy，\"shesighed，\"thisisgreat！Sure，I’llmarrywidye。Butwhydidn’tyetellmeyewasthecook？Iwasnearturnin’yedownforbein’oneofthimforeigncounts！\" FROMEACHACCORDINGTOHISABILITY Vuyninglefthisclub，cursingitsoftly，withoutanyparticularanger。Fromteninthemorningun— tilelevenithadboredhimimmeasurably。Kirkwithhisfishstory，BrookswithhisPortoRicocigars，oldMorrisonwithhisanecdoteaboutthewidow，Hep— burnwithhisinvariableluckatbilliards——alltheseafflictionshadbeenrepeatedwithoutchangeofbillorscenery。BesidesthesemorningevilsMissAllisonhadrefusedhimagainonthenightbefore。Butthatwasachronictrouble。FivetimesshehadlaughedathisoffertomakeherMrs。Vuyning。HeintendedtoaskheragainthenextWednesdayevening。 VuyningwalkedalongForty—fourthStreettoBroadway，andthendrifteddownthegreatsluicethatwashesoutthedustofthegold—minesofGotham。 Heworeamorningsuitoflightgray，low，dullkidshoes，aplain，finelywovenstrawhat，andhisvisiblelinenwasthemostdelicatepossibleshadeofbelio— trope。Hisnecktiewastheblue—grayofaNovem— bersky，anditsknotwasplainlytheoutcomeofalordlycarelessnesscombinedwithanaccuratecon— ceptionofthemostrecentdictumoffashion。 Now，towriteofaman’shaberdasheryisaworsethingthantowriteahistoricalnovel\"around\" PaulJones，ortopenatestimonialtoahay—fevercure。 Therefore，letitbeknownthatthedescriptionofVuyning’sapparelisgermanetothemovementsofthestory，andnottomakeroomforthenewfallstockofgoods。 EvenBroadwaythatmorningwasadiscordinVuyning’sears;andinhiseyesitparalleledforafewdreamy，drearyminutesacertainhowling，scorching，seething，malodoroussliceofstreetthatherememberedinMorocco。Hesawthestrugglingmassofdogs，beggars，fakirs，slave—driversandveiledwomenincartswithouthorses，thesunblazingbrightlyamongthebazaars，thepilesofrubbishfromruinedtemplesinthestreet—andthenalady，passing，jabbedtheferruleofaparasolinhissideandbroughthimbacktoBroadway。 Fiveminutesofhisstrollbroughthimtoacertaincorner，whereanumberofsilent，pale—facedmenareaccustomedtostand，immovably，forhours，busywiththefilebladesoftheirpenknives，withtheirhatbrimsonalevelwiththeireyelids。WallStreetspeculators，drivinghomeintheircarriages，lovetopointoutthesementotheirvisitingfriendsandtellthemofthisratherfamouslounging—placeofthe\"crooks。\"OnWallStreetthespeculatorsneverusethefilebladesoftheirknives。 Vuyningwasdelightedwhenoneofthiscompanysteppedforthandaddressedhimashewaspassing。 Hewashungryforsomethingoutoftheordinary，andtobeaccostedbythissmooth—faced，keen—eyed，low—voiced，athleticmemberoftheunderworld，withhisgrim，yetpleasantsmile，hadallthetasteofanadventuretotheconvention—wearyVuyning。 \"Excuseme，friend，\"saidbe。\"CouldIhaveafewminutes’talkwithyou——onthelevel？\" \"Certainly，\"saidVuyning，withasmile。\"But，supposewestepasidetoaquieterplace。Thereisadivan——acafeoverherethatwilldo。Schrummwillgiveusaprivatecorner。\" Schrummestablishedthemunderagrowingpalm，withtwoseidlsbetweenthem。Vuyningmadeapleasantreferencetometeorologicalconditions，thusformingabingeuponwhichmightbeswungthedoorleadingfromthethoughtrepositoryoftheother。 \"Inthefirstplace，\"saidhiscompanion，withtheairofonewhopresentshiscredentials，\"IwantyoutounderstandthatIamacrook。OutWestIamknownasRowdytheDude。Pickpocket，supperman，second—storyman，yeggman，boxman，all—roundbur— glar，cardsharpandslickestconmanwestoftheTwenty—thirdStreetferrylanding——that’smyhis— tory。That’stoshowI’monthesquare——withyou。 Myname’sEmerson。\" \"ConfoundoldKirkwithhisfishstories\"saidVuyningtohimself，withsilentgleeashewentthroughhispocketsforacard。\"It’spronounced’Vining，’\"hesaid，ashetosseditovertotheother。 \"AndI’llbeasfrankwithyou。I’mjustakindofaloafer，Iguess，livingonmydaddy’smoney。Attheclubtheycallme’Left—at—the—Post。’Ineverdidaday’sworkinmylife;andIhaven’tthehearttorunoverachickenwhenI’mmotoring。It’saprettyshabbyrecord，altogether。\" \"There’sonethingyoucando，\"saidEmerson，admiringly;\"youcancarryduds。I’vewatchedyouseveraltimespassonBroadway。YoulookthebestdressedmanI’veseen。AndI’llbetyouagoldmineI’vegot$50worthmoregent’sfurnishingsonmyframethanyouhave。That’swhatIwantedtoseeyouabout。Ican’tdothetrick。Takealookatme。What’swrong？\" \"Standup，\"saidVuyning。 Emersonarose，andslowlyrevolved。 \"You’vebeen’outfitted，’\"declaredtheclubman。 \"SomeBroadwaywindow—dresserhasmisusedyou。\" \"That’sanexpensivesuit，though，Emerson。\" \"Ahundreddollars，\"saidEmerson。 \"Twentytoomuch，\"saidVuyning。\"Sixmonthsoldincut，oneinchtoolong，andhalfaninchto— muchlapel。Yourhatisplainlydatedoneyearago，althoughthere’sonlyasixteenthofaninchlackinginthebrimtotellthestory。ThatEnglishpokeinyourcollaristooshortbythedistancebetweenTroyandLondon。Aplaingoldlinkcuff—buttonwouldtakealltheshineoutofthosepearloneswithdia— mondsettings。ThosetanshoeswouldbeexactlythearticlestoworkintotheheartofaBrooklynschool—ma’amonatwoweeks’visittoLakeRonkon— koma。IthinkIcaughtaglimpseofabluesilksockembroideredwithrussetliliesofthevalleywhenyou——improperly——drewupyourtrousersasyousatdown。Therearealwaysplainonestobehadinthestores。HaveIhurtyourfeelings，Emer— son？\" \"Doubletheante！\"criedthecriticisedone，greed— ily。\"Givememoreofit。There’sawaytototethehaberdashery，andIwanttogetwisetoit。Say，you’retherightkindofaswell。Anythingelsetothequeeraboutme？\" \"Yourtie，\"saidVuyning，\"istiedwithabsoluteprecisionandcorrectness。\" \"Thanks，\"gratefully——\"IspentoverhalfanhouratitbeforeI——\" \"Thereby，\"interruptedVuyning，\"completingyourresemblancetoadummyinaBroadwaystorewindow。\" \"Yourstruly，\"saidEmerson，sittingdownagain。 \"It’sbullyofyoutoputmewise。Iknewtherewassomethingwrong，butIcouldn’tjustputmyfingeronit。Iguessitcomesbynaturetoknowhowtowearclothes。\" \"Oh，Isuppose，\"saidVuyning，withalaugh，\"thatmyancestorspickeduptheknackwhiletheywerepeddlingclothesfromhousetohouseacoupleofhundredyearsago。I’mtoldtheydidthat。\" \"Andmine，\"saidEmerson，cheerfully，\"weremakingtheirvisitsatnight，Iguess，anddidn’thaveachancetocatchontothecorrectstyles。\" \"Itellyouwhat，\"saidVuyning，whoseennuihadtakenwings，\"I’lltakeyoutomytailor。He’lleliminatethemarkofthebeastfromyourexterior。 Thatis，ifyoucaretogoanyfurtherinthewayofexpense。\" \"Play’emtotheceiling，\"saidEmerson，withaboyishsmileofjoy。\"I’vegotarollasbigaroundasabarrelofblack—eyedpeasandaslooseasthewrapperofatwo—for—fiver。Idon’tmindtellingyouthatIwasnottouringamongtheAntipodeswhentheburglar—proofsafeoftheFarmers’NationalBankofButterville，Ia。，flewopensomemoonlessnightsagotothetuneof$16，000。\" \"Aren’tyouafraid，\"askedVuyning，\"thatI’llcallacopandhandyouover？\" \"Youtellme，\"saidEmerson，coolly，\"whyI didn’tkeepthem。\" HelaidVuyning’spocketbookandwatch——theVuyning100—year—oldfamilywatchonthetable。 \"Man，\"saidVuyning，revelling，\"didyoueverhearthetaleKirktellsaboutthesix—poundtroutandtheoldfisherman？\" \"Seemsnot，\"saidEmerson，politely。\"I’dliketo。\" \"Butyouwon’t，\"saidVuyning。\"I’vehearditscoresoftimes。That’swhyIwon’ttellyou。Iwasjustthinkinghowmuchbetterthisisthanaclub。 Now，shallwegotomytailor？\" \"Boys，andelderlygents，\"saidVuyning，fivedayslaterathisclub，standingupagainstthewindowwherehiscoteriewasgathered，andkeepingoutthebreeze，\"afriendofminefromtheWestwilldineatourtablethisevening。\" \"WillheaskifwehaveheardthelatestfromDenver？\"saidamember，squirminginhischair。 \"Willhementionthenewtwenty—three—storyMa— sonicTemple，inQuincy，Ill。？\"inquiredanother，droppinghisnose—glasses。 \"WillhespringoneofthoseWesternMississippiRivercatfishstories，inwhichtheyuseyearlingcalvesforbait？\"demandedKirk，fiercely。 \"Becomforted，\"saidVuyning。\"Hehasnoneofthelittlevices。Heisaburglarandsafe—blower，andapalofmine。\" \"Oh，MaryAnn！\"saidthey。\"Mustyoualwaysadorneverystatementwithyourallegedhumor？\" Itcametopassthatateightintheeveningacalm，smooth，brilliant，affablemansatatVuyning’srighthandduringdinner。AndwhentheoneswhopasstheirlivesincitystreetsspokeofskyscrapersorofthelittleCzaronhisfar，frozenthrone，orofinsig— nificantfishfrominconsequentialstreams，thisbig，deep—chestedman，faultlesslyclothed，andeyedlikeanEmperor，disposedoftheirLilliputianchatterwithawinkofhiseyelash。 Andthenhepaintedforthemwithhard，broadstrokesamarvellouslingualpanoramaoftheWest。 Hestackedsnow—toppedmountainsonthetable，freezingthehotdishesofthewaitingdiners。Withawaveofhishandheswepttheclubhouseintoapine—crownedgorge，turningthewaitersintoagrimposse，andeachlistenerintoablood—stainedfugitive，climbingwithtornfingersupontheensanguinedrocks。Hetouchedthetableandspake，andthefivepantedastheygazedonbarrenlavabeds，andeachmantookhistonguebetweenhisteethandfelthismouthbakeatthetaleofalandemptyofwaterandfood。AssimplyasHomersang，whilehedugatineofhisforkleisurelyintothetablecloth，heopenedanewworldtotheirview，asdoesonewhotellsachildoftheLooking—GlassCountry。 AsoneofhislistenersmighthavespokenofteatoostrongataMadisonSquare\"afternoon，\"sohedepictedtheravagesofredeyeinabordertownwhenthecaballerosofthelariatand\"forty—five\" reducedennuitoaminimum。 Andthen，withasweepofhiswhite，unringedhands，bedismissedMelpomene，andforthwithDianaandAmaryllisfooteditbeforethemind’seyesoftheclubmen。 Thesavannasofthecontinentspreadbeforethem。 Thewind，hummingthroughahundredleaguesofsagebrushandmesquite，closedtheirearstothecity’sstaccatonoises。Hetoldthemofcamps，ofranchesmaroonedinaseaoffragrantprairieblos— soms，ofgallopsinthestillynightthatApollowouldhaveforsakenhisdaytimesteedstoenjoy;hereadthemthegreat，roughepicofthecattleandthehillsthathavenotbeenspoiledbythebandofman，themason。Hiswordswereatelescopetothecitymen，whoseeyeshadlookeduponYoungstown，O。，andwhosetongueshadcalledit\"West。\" Infact，Emersonhadthem\"going。\" ThenextmorningattenhemetVuyning，byap— pointment，ataForty—secondStreetcafe。 EmersonwastoleavefortheWestthatday。HeworeasuitofdarkcheviotthatlookedtohavebeendrapeduponhimbyanancientGreciantailorwhowasafewthousandyearsaheadofthestyles。 \"Mr。Vuyning，\"saidhe，withtheclear，ingenuoussmileofthesuccessful\"crook，\"it’suptometogothelimitforyouanytimeIcandoso。You’retherealthing;andifIcaneverreturnthefavor，youbetyourlifeI’lldoit。\" \"Whatwasthatcow—puncher’sname？\"askedVuyning，\"whousedtocatchamustangbythenoseandmane，andthrowhimtillheputthebridleon？\" \"Bates，\"saidEmerson。 \"Thanks，\"saidVuyning。\"IthoughtitwasYates。Oh，aboutthattoggerybusiness——I’dfor— gottenthat。\" \"I’vebeenlookingforsomeguytoputmeontherighttrackforyears，\"saidEmerson。\"You’rethegoods，dutyfree，andhalf—waytothewarehouseinaredwagon。\" \"Bacon，toastedonagreenwillowswitchoverredcoals，oughttoputbroiledlobstersoutofbusiness，\" saidVuyning。\"Andyousayahorseattheendofathirty—footropecan’tpullaten—inchstakeoutofwetprairie？Well，good—bye，oldman，ifyoumustbeoff。\" Atoneo’clockVuyninghadluncheonwithMissAllisonbypreviousarrangement。 Forthirtyminutesbebabbledtoher，unaccount— ably，ofranches，horses，cations，cyclones，round—ups，RockyMountainsandbeansandbacon。Shelookedathimwithwonderingandhalf—terrifiedeyes。 \"Iwasgoingtoproposeagainto—day，\"saidVuy— ning，cheerily，butIwon’t。I’veworriedyouoftenenough。YouknowdadhasaranchinColorado。 What’sthegoodofstayinghere？Jumpingjon— quils！butit’sgreatoutthere。I’mgoingtostartnextTuesday。\" \"No，youwon’t，\"saidMissAllison。 \"What？\"saidVuyning。 \"Notalone，\"saidMissAllison，droppingatearuponhersalad。\"Whatdoyouthink？\" \"Betty！\"exclaimedVuyning，\"whatdoyoumean？ \"I’llgotoo，\"saidMissAllison，forcibly。 VuyningfilledherglasswithApollinaris。 \"Here’stoRowdytheDude！\"hegave——atoastmysterious。 \"Don’tknowhim，\"saidMissAllison;\"butifhe’syourfriend，Jimmy——heregoes！\" THEMEMENTO MissLynnetteD’ArmandeturnedherbackonBroadway。Thiswasbuttitfortat，be— causeBroadwayhadoftendonethesamethingtoMissD’Armande。Still，the\"tats\"seemedtohaveit，fortheex—leadingladyofthe\"ReapingtheWhirlwind\"companyhadeverythingtoaskofBroadway，whiletherewasnovice—versa。 SoMissLynnetteD’ArmandeturnedthebackofherchairtoherwindowthatoverlookedBroadway，andsatdowntostitchintimethelisle—threadheelofablacksilkstocking。ThetumultandglitteroftheroaringBroadwaybeneathherwindowhadnocharmforher;whatshegreatlydesiredwasthestiflingairofadressing—roomonthatfairylandstreetandtheroarofanaudiencegatheredinthatcapriciousquarter。Inthemeantime，thosestock— ingsmustnotbeneglected。Silkdoeswearoutso，but——afterall，isn’titjusttheonlygoodsthereis？ TheHotelThalialooksonBroadwayasMarathonlooksonthesea。Itstandslikeagloomycliffabovethewhirlpoolwherethetidesoftwogreatthorough— faresclash。Heretheplayer—bandsgatherattheendoftheirwanderings，toloosenthebuskinanddustthesock。Thickinthestreetsarounditarebooking— offices，theatres，agents，schools，andthelobster—pal— acestowhichthosethornypathslead。 WanderingthroughtheeccentrichallsofthedimandfustyThalia，youseemtohavefoundyourselfinsomegreatarkorcaravanabouttosail，orfly，orrollawayonwheels。Aboutthehouselingersasenseofunrest，ofexpectation，oftransientness，evenofanxietyandapprehension。Thehallsarealabyrinth。 Withoutaguide，youwanderlikealostsoulinaSamLoydpuzzle。 Turninganycorner，adressing—sackoracul—de—sacmaybringyouupshort。Youmeetalarmingtragediansstalkinginbath—robesinsearchofru— moredbathrooms。Fromhundredsofroomscomethebuzzoftalk，scrapsofnewandoldsongs，andthereadylaughteroftheconvenedplayers。 Summerhascome;theircompanieshavedisbanded，andtheytaketheirrestintheirfavoritecaravansary，whiletheybesiegethemanagersforengagementsforthecomingseason。 Atthishouroftheafternoontheday’sworkoftrampingtheroundsoftheagents’officesisover。 Pastyou，asyourambledistractedlythroughthemossyhalls，flitaudiblevisionsofhouris，withveiled，starryeyes，flyingtag—endsofthingsandaswishofsilk，bequeathingtothedullhallwaysanodorofgaietyandamemoryoffrangipanni。Seriousyoungcomedians，withversatileAdam’sapples，gatherindoorwaysandtalkofBooth。Far—reachingfromsomewherecomesthesmellofhamandredcabbage，andthecrashofdishesontheAmericanplan。 TheindeterminatehumoflifeintheThaliaisenlivenedbythediscreetpopping——atreasonableandsalubriousintervals——ofbeer—bottlecorks。 Thuspunctuated，lifeinthegenialhostelscanseasily——thecommabeingthefavoritemark，semicolonsfrownedupon，andperiodsbarred。 MissD’Armannde’sroomwasasmallone。Therewasroomforherrockerbetweenthedresserandthewash—standifitwereplacedlongitudinally。Onthedresserwereitsusualaccoutrements，plustheex—lead— inglady’scollectedsouvenirsofroadengagementsandphotographsofherdearestandbestprofessionalfriends。 Atoneofthesephotographsshelookedtwiceorthriceasshedarned，andsmiledfriendlily。 \"I’dliketoknowwhereLeeisjustthisminute，\" shesaid，half—aloud。 Ifyouhadbeenprivilegedtoviewthephotographthusflattered，youwouldhavethoughtatthefirstglancethatyousawthepictureofamany—petalledwhiteflower，blownthroughtheairbyastorm。Butthefloralkingdomwasnotresponsibleforthatswirlofpetalouswhiteness。 Yousawthefilmy，briefskirtofMissRosalieRayasshemadeacompleteheels—over—headturninherwistaria—entwinedswing，faroutfromthestage，highabovetheheadsoftheaudience。Yousawthecam— era’sinadequaterepresentationofthegraceful，strongkick，withwhichshe，atthisexcitingmoment，sentflying，highandfar，theyellowsilkgarterthateacheveningspunfromheragilelimbanddescendeduponthedelightedaudiencebelow。 Yousaw，too，amidtheblack—clothed，mainlymas— culinepatronsofselectvaudevilleahundredhandsraisedwiththehopeofstayingtheflightofthebril— liantaerialtoken。 FortyweeksofthebestcircuitsthisacthadbroughtMissRosalieRay，foreachoftwoyears。 Shedidotherthingsduringhertwelveminutes——asonganddance，imitationsoftwoorthreeactorswhoarebutimitationsofthemselves，andabalancingfeatwithastep—ladderandfeather—duster;butwhentheblossom—deckedswingwasletdownfromtheflies，andMissRosaliesprangsmilingintotheseat，withthegoldencircletconspicuousintheplacewhenceitwassoontoslideandbecomeasoaringandcovetedguerdon——thenitwasthattheaudienceroseinitsseatasasingleman——orpresumablyso——andin— dorsedthespecialtythatmadeMissRay’snameafavoriteinthebooking—offices。 AttheendofthetwoyearsMissRaysuddenlyan— nouncedtoherdearfriend，MissD’Armande，thatshewasgoingtospendthesummeratanantediluvianvillageonthenorthshoreofLongIsland，andthatthestagewouldseehernomore。 SeventeenminutesafterMissLynnetteD’Armandehadexpressedherwishtoknowthewhereaboutsofheroldchum，thereweresharprapsatherdoor。 DoubtnotthatitwasRosalieRay。Attheshrillcommandtoentershedidso，withsomethingofatiredflutter，anddroppedaheavyhand—bagonthefloor。Uponmyword，itwasRosalie，inaloose，travel—stainedautomobilelesscoat，closelytiedbrownveilwithyard—long，flyingends，graywalking—suitandtanoxfordswithlavenderovergaiters。 Whenshethrewoffherveilandhat，yousawaprettyenoughface，nowflushedanddisturbedbysomeunusualemotion，andrestless，largeeyeswithdiscontentmarringtheirbrightness。Aheavypileofdullauburnhair，hastilyputup，wasescapingincrinkly，wavingstrandsandcurling，smalllocksfromtheconfiningcombsandpins。 Themeetingofthetwowasnotmarkedbytheeffusionvocal，gymnastical，osculatoryandcatecheti— calthatdistinguishesthegreetingsoftheirunpro— fessionalsistersinsociety。Therewasabriefclinch，twosimultaneouslabialdabsandtheystoodonthesamefootingoftheolddays。Verymuchliketheshortsalutationsofsoldiersoroftravellersinfor— eignwildsarethewelcomesbetweenthestrollersatthecornersoftheircrisscrossroads。 \"I’vegotthehall—roomtwoflightsupaboveyours，\"saidRosalie，\"butIcamestraighttoseeyoubeforegoingup。Ididn’tknowyouwereheretilltheytoldme。\" \"I’vebeeninsincethelastofApril，\"saidLyn— nette。\"AndI’mgoingontheroadwitha’FatalInheritance’company。WeopennextweekinEliz— abeth。Ithoughtyou’dquitthestage，Lee。Tellmeaboutyourself。\" RosaliesettledherselfwithaskilfulwriggleonthetopofMissD’Armande’swardrobetrunk，andleanedherheadagainstthepaperedwall。Fromlonghabit，thuscanperipateticleadingladiesandtheirsistersmakethemselvesascomfort。 ableasthoughthedeepestarmchairsembracedthem。 \"I’mgoingtotellyou，Lynn，\"shesaid，withastrangelysardonicandyetcarelesslyresignedlookonheryouthfulface。\"Andthento—morrowI’llstriketheoldBroadwaytrailagain，andwearsomemorepaintoffthechairsintheagents’offices。Ifanybodyhadtoldmeanytimeinthelastthreemonthsuptofouro’clockthisafternoonthatI’deverlistentothat’Leave—your—name—and—address’rotofthebookingbunchagain，I’dhavegiven’emtherealMrs。 Fiskelaugh。Loanmeahandkerchief，Lynn。Gee！ butthoseLongIslandtrainsarefierce。I’vegotenoughsoft—coalcindersonmyfacetogoonandplayTopsywithoutusingthecork。And，speakingofcorks——gotanythingtodrink，Lynn？\" MissD’Armandeopenedadoorofthewash—standandtookoutabottle。 \"There’snearlyapintofManhattan。There’saclusterofcarnationsinthedrinkingglass，but——\" \"Oh，passthebottle。Savetheglassforcom— pany。Thanks！Thathitsthespot。Thesametoyou。Myfirstdrinkinthreemonths！\" \"Yes，Lynn，Iquitthestageattheendoflastseason。IquititbecauseIwassickofthelife。Andespeciallybecausemyheartandsoulweresickofmenofthekindofmenwestagepeoplehavetobeupagainst。Youknowwhatthegameistous——it’safightagainst’emallthewaydownthelinefromthemanagerwhowantsustotryhisnewmotor—cartothebill—posterswhowanttocallusbyourfrontnames。 \"Andthemenwehavetomeetaftertheshowaretheworstofall。Thestage—doorkind，andtheman— ager’sfriendswhotakeustosupperandshowtheirdiamondsandtalkaboutseeing’Dan’and’Dave’ and’Charlie’forus。They’rebeasts，andIhate’em。 \"Itellyou，Lynn，it’sthegirlslikeusonthestagethatoughttobepitied。It’sgirlsfromgoodhomesthatarehonestlyambitiousandworkhardtoriseintheprofession，butneverdogetthere。Youbearalotofsympathysloshedaroundonchorusgirlsandtheirfifteendollarsaweek。Piffle！Thereain’tasorrowinthechorusthatalobstercannotheal。 \"Ifthere’sanytearstoshed，let’emfallfortheactressthatgetsasalaryoffromthirtytoforty—fivedollarsaweekfortakingaleadingpartinabumshow。Sheknowsshe’llneverdoanybetter;butshehangsonforyears，hopingforthe’chanceIthatnevercomes。 \"Andthefoolplayswehavetoworkin！Havinganothergirlrollyouaroundthestagebythehindlegsina’WheelbarrowChorus’inamusicalcomedyisdignifieddramacomparedwiththeidioticthingsI’vehadtodointhethirty—centers。 \"ButwhatIhatedmostwasthemen——themenleeringandblatheringatyouacrosstables，tryingtobuyyouwithWurzburgerorExtraDry，accord— ingtotheirestimateofyourprice。Andthemenintheaudiences，clapping，yelling，snarling，crowding，writhing，gloating——likealotofwildbeasts，withtheireyesfixedonyou，readytoeatyouupifyoucomeinreachoftheirclaws。Oh，howIhate’em！ \"Well，I’mnottellingyoumuchaboutmyself，amI，Lynn？ \"Ihadtwohundreddollarssavedup，andIcutthestagethefirstofthesummer。IwentoveronLongIslandandfoundthesweetestlittlevillagethateverwas，calledSoundport，rightonthewater。Iwasgoingtospendthesummerthere，andstudyuponelocution，andtrytogetaclassinthefall。Therewasanoldwidowladywithacottagenearthebeachwhosometimesrentedaroomortwojustforcom— pany，andshetookmein。Shehadanotherboarder，too——theReverendArthurLyle。 \"Yes，hewasthehead—liner。You’reon，Lynn。 I’lltellyouallofitinaminute。It’sonlyaone—actplay。 \"Thefirsttimehewalkedon，Lynn，Ifeltmyselfgoing;thefirstlineshespoke，hehadme。Hewasdifferentfromthemeninaudiences。Hewastallandslim，andyouneverheardhimcomeintheroom，butyoufelthim。Hehadafacelikeapictureofaknight——likeoneofthatRoundTablebunch——andavoicelikea’cellosolo。Andhismanners！ \"Lynn，ifyou’dtakeJohnDrewinhisbestdraw— ing—roomsceneandcomparethetwo，you’dhaveJohnarrestedfordisturbingthepeace。 \"I’llspareyoutheparticulars;butinlessthanamonthArthurandIwereengaged。Hepreachedatalittleone—nightstandofaMethodistchurch。Therewastobeaparsonagethesizeofalunch—wagon，andhensandhoneysuckleswhenweweremarried。Ar— thurusedtopreachtomeagooddealaboutHeaven，butbenevercouldgetmymindquiteoffthosehoney— sucklesandhens。 \"No;Ididn’ttellhimI’dbeenonthestage。I hatedthebusinessandallthatwentwithit;I’dcutitoutforever，andIdidn’tseeanyuseofstirringthingsup。Iwasagoodgirl，andIdidn’thaveany— thingtoconfess，exceptbeinganelocutionist，andthatwasaboutallthestrainmyconsciencewouldstand。 \"Oh，Itellyou，Lynn，Iwashappy。Isanginthechoirandattendedthesewingsociety，andre— citedthat’AnnieLaurie’thingwiththewhistlingstuntinit，’inamannerborderingupontheprofes— sional，’astheweeklyvillagepaperreportedit。AndArthurandIwentrowing，andwalkinginthewoods，andclamming，andthatpokylittlevillageseemedtomethebestplaceintheworld。I’dhavebeenhappytolivetherealways，too，if—— \"ButonemorningoldMrs。Gurley，thewidowlady，gotgossipywhileIwashelpingherstringbeansonthebackporch，andbegantogushinformation，asfolkswhorentouttheirroomsusuallydo。Mr。Lylewasherideaofasaintonearth——ashewasmine，too。Shewentoverallhisvirtuesandgraces，andwoundupbytellingmethatArthurhadhadanex— tremelyromanticlove—affair，notlongbefore，thathadendedunhappily。Shedidn’tseemtobeontothede— tails，butsheknewthathehadbeenhitprettyhard。 Hewaspalerandthinner，shesaid，andhehadsomekindofaremembranceorkeepsakeoftheladyinalittlerosewoodboxthathekeptlockedinhisdeskdrawerinhisstudy。 \"’Severaltimes，\"saysshe，\"I’veseenhimgloomerin’overthatboxofevenings，andhealwayslocksituprightawayifanybodycomesintotheroom。’ \"Well，youcanimaginehowlongitwasbeforeI gotArthurbythewristandledhimdownstageandhissedinhisear。 \"Thatsameafternoonwewerelazyingaroundinaboatamongthewater—liliesattheedgeofthebay。 \"’Arthur，’saysI，’younevertoldmeyou’dhadanotherlove—affair。ButMrs。Gurleydid，’Iwenton，tolethimknowIknew。Ihatetobearamanlie。 \"’Beforeyoucame，’sayshe，lookingmefranklyintheeye，’therewasapreviousaffection—astrongone。Sinceyouknowofit，Iwillbeperfectlycandidwithyou。’ \"’Iamwaiting，’saysI。 \"’MydearIda，’saysArthur——ofcourseIwentbymyrealname，whileIwasinSoundport——’thisformeraffectionwasaspiritualone，infact。Al— thoughtheladyarousedmydeepestsentiments，andwas，asIthought，myidealwoman，Inevermether，andneverspoketoher。Itwasanideallove。Myloveforyou，whilenolessideal，isdifferent。Youwouldn’tletthatcomebetweenus。’ \"’Wasshepretty？’iasked。 \"’Shewasverybeautiful，’saidArthur。 \"’Didyouseeheroften？’Iasked。 \"’Somethinglikeadozentimes，’sayshe。 \"’Alwaysfromadistance？’saysI。 \"’Alwaysfromquiteadistance，’sayshe。 \"’Andyoulovedher？’Iasked。 \"’Sheseemedmyidealofbeautyandgrace——andsoul，\"saysArthur。 \"’Andthiskeepsakethatyoukeepunderlockandkey，andmoonoverattimes，isthataremembrancefromher？’ \"’Amemento，’saysArthur，’thatIhavetreasured。’ \"’Didshesendittoyou？’ \"’Itcametomefromher’saysbe。 \"’Inaroundaboutway？’Iasked。 \"’Somewhatroundabout，’sayshe，’andyetratherdirect。’ \"’Whydidn’tyouevermeether？’Iasked。 ’Wereyourpositionsinlifesodifferent？’ \"Shewasfaraboveme，’saysArthur。’Now，Ida，’hegoeson，’thisisallofthepast。You’renotgoingtobejealous，areyou？’ ’Jealous！’saysI。’Why，man，whatareyoutalkingabout？ItmakesmethinktentimesasmuchofyouasIdidbeforeIknewaboutit。’ \"Anditdid，Lynn—ifyoucanunderstandit。 Thatideallovewasanewoneonme，butitstruckmeasbeingthemostbeautifulandgloriousthingI’deverheardof。Thinkofamanlovingawomanhe’dneverevenspokento，andbeingfaithfuljusttowhathismindandheartpicturedher！Oh，itsoundedgreattome。ThemenI’dalwaysknowncomeatyouwitheitherdiamonds，knock—out—dropsoraraiseofsalary，——andtheirideals！——well，we’llsaynomore。\" \"Yes，itmademethinkmoreofArthurthanIdidbefore。Icouldn’tbejealousofthatfar—awaydivin— itythatheusedtoworship，forIwasgoingtohavehimmyself。AndIbegantolookuponhimasasaintonearth，justasoldladyGurleydid。 \"Aboutfouro’clockthisafternoonamancametothehouseforArthurtogoandseesomebodythatwassickamonghischurchbunch。OldladyGurleywastakingherafternoonsnoreonacouch，sothatleftmeprettymuchalone。 \"InpassingbyArthur’sstudyIlookedin，andsawhisbunchofkeyshanginginthedrawerofhisdesk，wherehe’dforgotten’em。Well，Iguesswe’realltotheMrs。Bluebeardnowandthen，ain’twe，Lynn？ImadeupmymindI’dhavealookatthatmementohekeptsosecret。NotthatIcaredwhatitwas——itwasjustcuriosity。 \"WhileIwasopeningthedrawerIimaginedoneortwothingsitmightbe。Ithoughtitmightbeadriedrosebudshe’ddroppeddowntohimfromabalcony，ormaybeapictureofherhe’dcutoutofamagazine，shebeingsohighupintheworld。 \"Iopenedthedrawer，andtherewastherosewoodcasketaboutthesizeofagent’scollarbox。Ifoundthelittlekeyinthebunchthatfittedit，andunlockeditandraisedthelid。 \"Itookonelookatthatmemento，andthenIwenttomyroomandpackedmytrunk。Ithrewafewthingsintomygrip，gavemyhairaflirtortwowithaside—comb，putonmyhat，andwentinandgavetheoldlady’sfootakick。I’dtriedawfullyhardtouseproperandcorrectlanguagewhileIwasthereforArthur’ssake，andIhadthehabitdownpat，butitleftmethen。 \"Stopsawinggourds，\"saysI，\"andsitupandtakenotice。Theghost’sabouttowalk。I’mgoingawayfromhere，andIoweyoueightdollars。Theexpressmanwillcallformytrunk。’ \"Ihandedherthemoney。 \"’Dearme，MissCrosby！’saysshe。’Isany— thingwrong？Ithoughtyouwerepleasedhere。 Dearme，youngwomenaresohardtounderstand，andsodifferentfromwhatyouexpect’emtobe。’ \"’You’redamnright，’saysI。’Someof’emare。 Butyoucan’tsaythataboutmen。Whenyouknowonemanyouknow’emall！Thatsettlesthehuman— racequestion。’ \"AndthenIcaughtthefour—thirty—eight，soft— coalunlimited;andhereIam。\" \"Youdidn’ttellmewhatwasinthebox，Lee，\"saidMissD’armande，anxiously。 \"OneofthoseyellowsilkgartersthatIusedtokickoffmylegintotheaudienceduringthatoldvaudevilleswingactofmine。Isthereanyofthecocktailleft，Lynn？\"