Hoopdriver，revertingtoanger，ifwithaslightcatchinhisthroat——thanwhichthreatofpersonalviolencenothinghadbeenfurtherfromhisthoughtsonenteringtheroom。Hesaidthisbecausehecouldthinkofnothingelsetosay，andstuckouthiselbowstruculentlytohidethesinkingofhisheart。Itiscurioushowsituationsrunawaywithus。
\"’Ullo，Charlie！\"saidthelittleman，and\"Myeye！\"saidtheownerofthechins。’You’regoingtowipeyourbootson’im？\"
saidthefairyoungman，inatoneofmildsurprise。
\"Iam，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver，withemphaticresolution，andglaredintheyoungman’sface。
\"That’sfairandreasonable，\"saidthemaninthevelveteenjacket;\"ifyoucan。\"
Theinterestofthemeetingseemedtransferredtotheyoungmaninthewhitetic。\"Ofcourse，ifyoucan’tfindoutwhichitis，Isupposeyou’repreparedtowipeyourbootsinaliberalwayoneverybodyintheroom，\"saidthisyoungman，inthesametoneofimpersonalquestion。\"Thisgentleman，thechampionlightweight——\"
\"Ownup，Charlie，\"saidtheyoungmanwiththegaiters，lookingupforamoment。\"Anddon’tgoa—dragginginyourbetters。It’sfairandsquare。Youcan’tgetoutofit。\"
\"Wasitthis——gent？\"beganMr。Hoopdriver。
\"Ofcourse，\"saidtheyoungmaninthewhitetie，\"whenitcomestotalkingofwipingboots——\"
\"I’mnottalking;I’mgoingtodoit，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver。
Helookedroundatthemeeting。Theywerenolongerantagonists;
theywerespectators。Hewouldhavetogothroughwithitnow。
ButthistoneofpersonalaggressiononthemakeroftheremarkhadsomehowgotridoftheoppressivefeelingofHoopdrivercontramundum。Apparently，hewouldhavetofightsomeone。Wouldhegetablackeye？Wouldhegetverymuchhurt？Praygoodnessitwasn’tthatsturdychapinthegaiters！Shouldheriseandbegin？
Whatwouldshethinkifhebroughtablackeyetobreakfastto—morrow？\"Isthistheman？\"saidMr。Hoopdriver，withabusiness—likecalm，andarmsmoreangularthanever。
\"Eat’im！\"saidthelittlemanwiththebeard;\"eat’imstraightorf。\"
\"Steadyon！\"saidtheyoungmaninthewhitetie。\"Steadyonaminute。IfIdidhappentosay——\"
\"Youdid，didyou？\"saidMr。Hoopdriver。
Backingoutofit，Charlie？\"saidtheyoungmanwiththegaiters。
\"Notabit，\"saidCharlie。\"Surelywecanpassabitofajoke——\"
\"I’mgoingtoteachyoutokeepyourjokestoyourself，\"saidMr。
Hoopdriver。
\"Bray—vo！\"saidtheshepherdoftheflockofchins。
\"CharlieISabittoofreewithhisjokes，\"saidthelittlemanwiththebeard。
\"It’sdownrightdisgusting，\"saidHoopdriver，fallingbackuponhisspeech。\"Aladycan’trideabicycleinacountryroad，orwearadressalittleoutoftheordinary，buteverydirtylittlegreasermustneedsgoshoutinginsults——\"
\"_I_didn’tknowtheyoungladywouldhearwhatIsaid，\"saidCharlie。\"Surelyonecanspeakfriendlytoone’sfriends。HowwasItoknowthedoorwasopen——\"
Hoopdriverbegantosuspectthathisantagonistwas，ifpossible，moreseriouslyalarmedattheprospectofviolencethanhimself，andhisspiritsroseagain。Thesechapsoughttohaveathoroughlesson。\"OfCOURSEyouknewthedoorwasopen，\"heretortedindignantly。\"OfCOURSEyouthoughtweshouldhearwhatyousaid。
Don’tgotellingliesaboutit。It’snogoodyoursayingthingslikethat。You’vehadyourfun，andyoumeanttohaveyourfun。
AndImeantomakeanexampleofyou，Sir。\"
\"Gingerbeer，\"saidthelittlemanwiththebeard，inaconfidentialtonetothevelveteenjacket，\"isregularupthis’otweather。Bustin’itsbottlesitiseverywhere。\"
\"What’sthegoodofscrappingaboutinapublichouse？\"saidCharlie，appealingtothecompany。\"Afairfightwithoutinterruptions，now，IWOULDN’Tmind，ifthegentleman’ssodisposed。\"
Evidentlythemanwashorriblyafraid。Mr。Hoopdrivergrewtruculent。
\"Whereyoulike，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver。\"jestwhereveryoulike。\"
\"Youinsultedthegent，\"saidthemaninvelveteen。
\"Don’tbeabloomin’funk，Charlie，\"saidthemaningaiters。
\"Why，yougotastoneofhim，ifyougotanounce。\"
\"WhatIsay，isthis，\"saidthegentlemanwiththeexcessivechins，tryingtogetahearingbybanginghischairarms。\"IfCharliegoessayingthings，heoughttoback’emup。That’swhatIsay。Idon’tmindhissayin’suchthings’tall，butheoughttobepreparedtoback’emup。\"
\"I’llBACK’emupallright，\"saidCharlie，withextremelybitteremphasison’back。’\"IfthegentlemanlikestocomeToosdayweek——\"
\"Rot！\"choppedinHoopdriver。\"Now。\"
\"’Ear，’ear，\"saidtheownerofthechins。
\"Neverputofftillto—morrow，Charlie，whatyoucandoto—day，\"
saidthemaninthevelveteencoat。
\"Yougottodoit，Charlie，\"saidthemaningaiters。\"It’snogood。\"
\"It’slikethis，\"saidCharlie，appealingtoeveryoneexceptHoopdriver。\"Here’sme，gottotakeinherladyship’sdinnerto—morrownight。HowshouldIlookwithablackeye？Andgoingroundwiththecarriagewithasplitlip？\"
\"Ifyoudon’twantyourfacesp’iled，Charlie，whydon’tyoukeepyourmouthshut？\"saidthepersoningaiters。
\"Exactly，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver，drivingithomewithgreatfierceness。\"Whydon’tyoushutyouruglymouth？\"
\"It’sasmuchasmysituation’sworth，\"protestedCharlie。
\"Youshouldhavethoughtofthatbefore，\"saidHoopdriver。
\"There’snooccasiontobesothunderin’’otaboutit。Ionlymeantthethingjoking，\"saidCharlie。\"ASonegentlemantoanother，I’mverysorryifthegentleman’sannoyed——\"
Everybodybegantospeakatonce。Mr。Hoopdrivertwirledhismoustache。HefeltthatCharlie’srecognitionofhisgentlemanlinesswasatanyratearedeemingfeature。Butitbecamehisposetoridehardandheavyovertheroutedfoc。Heshoutedsomeinsultingphraseoverthetumult。
\"You’reregularabject，\"themaningaiterswassayingtoCharlie。
Moreconfusion。
\"Onlydon’tthinkI’mafraid，——notofaspindle—leggedcusslikehimshoutedCharlie。\"BecauseIain’t。\"
\"Changeoffront，\"thoughtHoopdriver，alittlestartled。\"Wherearewegoing？\"
\"Don’tsitthereandbeabusive，\"saidthemaninvelveteen。
\"He’sofferedtohityou，andifIwashim，I’dhityounow。\"
\"Allright，then，\"saidCharlie，withasuddenchangeoffrontandspringingtohisfeet。\"IfImust，Imust。Now，then！\"Atthat，Hoopdriver，thechildofFate，rosetoo，withahorriblesensethathisinternalmonitorwasright。Thingshadtakenaturn。Hehadmadeamessofit，andnowtherewasnothingforit，sofarashecouldsee，buttohitthemanatonce。HeandCharliestoodsixfeetapart，withatablebetween，bothverybreathlessandfierce。Avulgarfightinapublic—house，andwithwhatwasonlytoopalpablyafootman！GoodHeavens！Andthiswasthedignified，scornfulremonstrance！Howthejuicehaditallhappened？Goroundthetableathim，Isuppose。Butbeforethebrawlcouldachieveitself，themaningaitersintervened。\"Nothere，\"hesaid，steppingbetweentheantagonists。Everyonewasstandingup。
\"Charlie’sartful，\"saidthelittlemanwiththebeard。
\"Buller’syard，\"saidthemanwiththegaiters，takingthecontroloftheentireaffairwiththeeasyreadinessofanaccomplishedpractitioner。\"IfthegentlemanDON’Tmind。\"
Buller’syard，itseemed，wastheveryplace。\"We’lldothethingregularanddecent，ifyouplease。\"Andbeforehecompletelyrealizedwhatwashappening，Hoopdriverwasbeingmarchedoutthroughthebackpremisesoftheinn，tothefirstandonlyfightwithfiststhatwasevertoglorifyhislife。
Outwardly，sofarastheintermittentmoonlightshowed，Mr。
Hoopdriverwasquietlybuteagerlypreparedtofight。Butinwardlyhewasachaosofconflictingpurposes。Itwasextraordinaryhowthingshappened。Oneremarkhadtrodsocloselyontheheelsofanother，thathehadhadthegreatestdifficultyinfollowingthedevelopmentofthebusiness。Hedistinctlyrememberedhimselfwalkingacrossfromoneroomtotheother，——adignified，evenanaristocraticfigure，primedwithconsideredeloquence，intentuponascathingremonstrancetothesewretchedyokels，regardingtheirmanners。Thenincidenthadflickeredintoincidentuntilherehewasoutinamoonlitlane，——aslight，darkfigureinagroupoflarger，indistinctfigures，——marchinginaquiet，business—likewaytowardssomeunknownhorroratBuller’syard。Fists！Itwasastonishing。Itwasterrible！InfrontofhimwasthepallidfigureofCharles，andhesawthatthemaningaitersheldCharleskindlybutfirmlybythearm。
\"It’sblastedrot，\"Charleswassaying，\"gettingupafightjustforathinglikethat;allverywellfor’im。’E’sgot’is’olidays;’e’asn’tnoblesseddinnertotakeupto—morrownightlikeI’ave。——Noneedtonumbmyarm，ISthere？\"
TheywentintoBuller’syardthroughgates。TherewereshedsinBuller’syard——shedsofmysterythatthemoonlightcouldnotsolve——asmellofcows，andapumpstoodoutclearandblack，throwingaclearblackshadowonthewhitewashedwall。Andhereitwashisfacewastobebatteredtoapulp。Heknewthiswastheuttermostfolly，tostanduphereandbepounded，butthewayoutofitwasbeyondhisimagining。Yetafterwards——？Couldheeverfaceheragain？HepattedhisNorfolkjacketandtookhisgroundwithhisbacktothegate。Howdidonesquare？So？Supposeoneweretoturnandrunevennow，runstraightbacktotheinnandlockhimselfintohisbedroom？Theycouldn’tmake，himcomeout——anyhow。Hecouldprosecutethemforassaultiftheydid。Howdidonesetaboutprosecutingforassault？HesawCharles，withhisfaceghastlywhiteunderthemoon，squaringinfrontofhim。
Hecaughtablowonthearmandgaveground。Charlespressedhim。
Thenhehitwithhisrightandwiththeviolenceofdespair。Itwasahitofhisowndevising，——animpromptu，——butitchancedtocoincidewiththeregulationhookhitatthehead。HeperceivedwithaleapofexultationthatthethinghisfisthadmetwasthejawboneofCharles。Itwasthesolegleamofpleasureheexperiencedduringthefight，anditwasquitemomentary。HehadhardlygothomeuponCharlesbeforehewasstruckinthechestandwhirledbackward。Hehadthegreatestdifficultyinkeepinghisfeet。Hefeltthathisheartwassmashedflat。\"Gorddarm！\"
saidsomebody，dancingtoeinhandsomewherebehindhim。AsMr。
Hoopdriverstaggered，Charlesgavealoudandfear—compellingcry。HeseemedtotoweroverHoopdriverinthemoonlight。Bothhisfistswerewhirling。Itwasannihilationcoming——noless。Mr。
Hoopdriverduckedperhapsandcertainlygavegroundtotheright，hit，andmissed。Charlessweptroundtotheleft，missinggenerously。AblowglancedoverMr。Hoopdriver’sleftear，andtheflankingmovementwascompleted。Anotherblowbehindtheear。
HeavenandearthspunfuriouslyroundMr。Hoopdriver，andthenhebecameawareofafigureinalightsuitshootingviolentlythroughanopengateintothenight。ThemaningaiterssprangforwardpastMr。Hoopdriver，buttoolatetointerceptthefugitive。Therewereshouts，laughter，andMr。Hoopdriver，stillsolemnlysquaring，realizedthegreatandwonderfultruth——Charleshadfled。He，Hoopdriver，hadfoughtand，byalltherulesofwar，hadwon。
\"Thatwasaprettycutunderthejawyougavehim，\"thetoothlesslittlemanwiththebeardwasremarkinginanunexpectedlyfriendlymanner。
\"Thefactofitis，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver，sittingbesidetheroadtoSalisbury，andwiththesoundofdistantchurchbellsinhiscars，\"Ihadtogivethefellowalesson;simplyhadto。\"
\"Itseemssodreadfulthatyoushouldhavetoknockpeopleabout，\"saidJessie。
\"Theseloutsgetunbearable，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver。\"Ifnowandthenwedidn’tgivethemalesson，——well，aladycyclistintheroadswouldbeanimpossibility。\"
\"Isupposeeverywomanshrinksfromviolence，\"saidJessie。\"I
supposemenAREbraver——inaway——thanwomen。Itseemstome—I
can’timagine—howonecouldbringoneselftofacearoomfulofroughcharacters，pickoutthebravest，and。givehimanexemplarythrashing。Iquailattheidea。IthoughtonlyOuida’sguardsmendidthingslikethat。\"
\"Itwasnothingmorethanmyjuty——asagentleman，\"saidMr。
Hoopdriver。
\"Buttowalkstraightintothefaceofdanger！\"
\"It’shabit，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver，quitemodestly，flickingoffaparticleofcigaretteashthathadsettledonhisknee。
THEABASEMENTOFMR。HOOPDRIVER
XXXIII
OnMondaymorningthetwofugitivesfoundthemselvesbreakfastingattheGoldenPheasantinBlandford。TheywereinthecourseofanelaboratedoublingmovementthroughDorsetshiretowardsRingwood，whereJessieanticipatedananswerfromherschoolmistressfriend。Bythistimetheyhadbeennearlysixtyhourstogether，andyouwillunderstandthatMr。Hoopdriver’sfeelingshadundergoneaconsiderableintensificationanddevelopment。AtfirstJessiehadbeenonlyanimpressionistsketchuponhismind，somethingfeminine，active，anddazzling，somethingemphatically\"above\"him，castintohiscompanybyakindlyfate。Hischiefidea，attheoutset，asyouknow，hadbeentoliveuptoherlevel，bypretendingtobemoreexceptional，morewealthy，bettereducated，and，aboveall，betterbornthanhewas。Hisknowledgeofthefemininemindwasalmostentirelyderivedfromtheyoungladieshehadmetinbusiness，andinthatclass（asinmilitarysocietyandamonggentlemen’sservants）thegoodoldtraditionofabrutalsocialexclusivenessisstillreligiouslypreserved。HehadanalmostintolerabledreadofherthinkinghimaIbounder。’Laterhebegantoperceivethedistinctionofheridiosyncracies。Coupledwithamagnificentwantofexperiencewasasplendidenthusiasmforabstractviewsofthemostadvanceddescription，andherstrengthofconvictioncompletelycarriedHoopdriveraway。ShewasgoingtoLiveherOwnLife，withemphasis，andMr。Hoopdriverwasprofoundlystirredtosimilarresolves。Sosoonashegraspedthetenorofherviews，heperceivedthathehimselfhadthoughtasmuchfromhisearliestyears。\"Ofcourse，\"heremarked，inaflashofsexualpride，\"amanisfreerthanawoman。EndintheColonies，y’know，thereisn’thalftheConventionalityyoufindinsocietyinthiscountry。\"
Hemadeoneortwoessaysinthedisplayofunconventionality，andwasquiteunawarethatheimpressedherasanarrow—mindedperson。Hesuppressedthehabitsofyearsandmadenoproposaltogotochurch。Hediscussedchurch—goinginaliberalspirit。
\"It’sjestahabit，\"hesaid，\"jestacustom。Idon’tseewhatgooditdoesyouatall，really。\"Andhemadealotofexcellentjokesatthechimney—pothat，jokeshehadreadintheGlobe’turnovers’onthatsubject。ButheshowedhisgentlebreedingbykeepinghisglovesonallthroughtheSunday’sride，andostentatiouslythrowingawaymorethanhalfacigarettewhentheypassedachurchwhosecongregationwasgatheringforafternoonservice。Hecautiouslyavoidedliterarytopics，exceptbywayofcompliment，seeingthatshewaspresentlytobewritingbooks。
ItwasonJessie’sinitiativethattheyattendedserviceintheold—fashionedgalleryofBlandfordchurch。Jessie’sconscience，I
mayperhapstellyou，wasnowsufferingtheseveresttwinges。Sheperceivedclearlythatthingswerenotworkingoutquitealongthelinesshehaddesigned—。ShehadreadherOliveSchreinerandGeorgeEgerton，andsoforth，withallthewantofperfectcomprehensionofonewhoisstillemotionallyagirl。SheknewthethingtodowastohaveaflatandtogototheBritishMuseumandwriteleadingarticlesforthedailyp，tpersuntilsomethingbettercamealong。IfBechamel（detestableperson）hadkepthispromises，insteadofbehavingwithunspeakablehorridness，allwouldhavebeenwell。Nowheronlyhopewasthatliberal—mindedwoman，MissMergle，who，ayearago，hadsentherout，highlyeducated，intotheworld。MissMerglehadtoldheratpartingtolivefearlesslyandtruly，andhadfurthergivenheravolumeofEmerson’sEssaysandMotley’s\"DutchRepublic，\"tohelpherthroughtherapidsofadolescence。
Jessie’sfeelingsforherstepmother’shouseholdatSurbitonamountedtoanactivedetestation。Therearenograverormoresolemnwomenintheworldthantheseclevergirlswhosescholasticadvancementhasretardedtheirfemininecoquetry。Inspiteoftheadvancedtoneof’ThomasPlantagenet’s’antimaritalnovel，Jessiehadspeedilyseenthroughthatamiablewoman’samiabledefences。Thevarietyofposenecessitatedbythecorpsof’Men’annoyedhertoanaltogetherunreasonabledegree。Toreturntothislifeofridiculousunreality——unconditionalcapitulationto’Conventionality’wasanexasperatingprospect。
Yetwhatelsewastheretodo？Youwillunderstand，therefore，thatattimesshewasmoody（andMr。Hoopdriverrespectfullysilentandattentive）andattimesinclinedtoeloquentdenunciationoftheexistingorderofthings。ShewasaSocialist，Hoopdriverlearnt，andhegaveavagueintimationthathewentfurther，intending，thereby，nolessthanthehorrorsofanarchism。HewouldhaveowneduptothedestructionoftheWinterPalaceindeed，hadhehadthefaintestideawheretheWinterPalacewas，andhadhisassuranceamountedtocertaintythattheWinterPalacewasdestroyed。Heagreedwithhercordiallythatthepositionofwomenwasintolerable，butcheckedhimselfonthe’vergeofthepropositionthatagirloughtnottoexpectafellowtohanddownboxesforherwhenhewasgettingthe’swap’fromacustomer。ItwasJessie’spreoccupationwithherownperplexities，nodoubt，thatdelayedtheunveilingofMr。
HoopdriverallthroughSaturdayandSunday。Onceortwice，however，therewereincidentsthatputhimaboutterribly——evenquestionsthatsavouredofsuspicion。
OnSundaynight，fornoconceivablereason，anunwontedwakefulnesscameuponhim。Unaccountablyherealisedhewasacontemptibleliar，AllthroughthesmallhoursofMondayhereviewedthetaleofhisfalsehoods，andwhenhetriedtoturnhismindfromthat，thefinancialproblemsuddenlyroseuponhim。
Heheardtwoo’clockstrike，andthree。Itisoddhowunhappysomeofusareattimes，whenweareatourhappiest。
XXXIV
\"Goodmorning，Madam，\"saidHoopdriver，asJessiecameintothebreakfastroomoftheGoldenPheasantonMondaymorning，andhesmiled，bowed，rubbedhishandstogether，andpulledoutachairforher，andrubbedhishandsagain。
Shestoppedabruptly，withapuzzledexpressiononherface。
\"WhereHAVEIseenthatbefore？\"shesaid。
\"Thechair？\"saidHoopdriver，flushing。
\"No——theattitude。\"
Shecameforwardandshookhandswithhim，lookingthewhilecuriouslyintohisface。\"And——Madam？\"
\"It’sahabit，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver，guiltily。\"Abadhabit。
CallingladiesMadam。Youmustputitdowntoourcolonialroughness。Outthereupcountry——y’know——theladies——sorare——wecall’emallMadam。\"
\"YouHAVEsomefunnyhabits，brotherChris，\"saidJessie。\"Beforeyousellyourdiamondsharesandgointosociety，asyousay，andstandforParliament——Whatafinethingitistobeaman！——youmustcureyourself。Thathabitofbowingasyoudo，andrubbingyourhands，andlookingexpectant。\"
\"It’sahabit。\"
\"Iknow。ButIdon’tthinkitagoodone。Youdon’tmindmytellingyou？\"
\"Notabit。I’mgrateful。\"
\"I’mblessedorafflictedwithatrickofobservation，\"saidJessie，lookingatthebreakfasttable。Mr。Hoopdriverputhishandtohismoustacheandthen，thinkingthismightbeanotherhabit，checkedhisarmandstuckhishandintohispocket。Hefeltjuicedawkward，tousehisprivateformula。Jessie’seyewanderedtothearmchair，whereapieceofbindingwasloose，and，possiblytocarryouthertheoryofanobservantdisposition，sheturnedandaskedhimforapin。
Mr。Hoopdriver’shandflutteredinstinctivelytohislappel，andthere，plantedbyhabit，wereacoupleofstraypinshehadimpounded。
\"Whatanoddplacetoputpins！\"exclaimedJessie，takingit。
\"It’s’andy，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver。\"Isawachapinashopdoitonce。\"
\"Youmusthaveacarefuldisposition，\"shesaid，overhershoulder，kneelingdowntothechair。
\"InthecentreofAfrica——upcountry，thatis——onelearnstovaluepins，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver，afteraperceptiblepause。
\"Thereweren’tovermanypinsinAfrica。Theydon’tlieaboutonthegroundthere。\"Hisfacewasnowinafine，redglow。Wherewouldthedraperbreakoutnext？Hethrusthishandsintohiscoatpockets，thentookoneoutagain，furtivelyremovedthesecondpinanddroppeditbehindhimgently。Itfellwithaloud’ping’onthefender。Happilyshemadenoremark，beingpreoccupiedwiththebindingofthechair。
Mr。Hoopdriver，insteadofsittingdown，wentuptothetableandstoodagainstit，withhisfinger—tipsuponthecloth。Theywerekeepingbreakfastatremendoustime。Hetookuphisrolledserviettelookedcloselyandscrutinisinglyatthering，thenputhishandunderthefoldofthenapkinandexaminedthetexture，andputthethingdownagain。Thenhehadavagueimpulsetofingerhishollowwisdomtooth——happilychecked。Hesuddenlydiscoveredhewasstandingasifthetablewasacounter，andsatdownforthwith。Hedrummedwithhishandonthetable。Hefeltdreadfullyhotandself—conscious。
\"Breakfastislate，\"saidJessie，standingup。
\"Isn’tit？\"
Conversationwasslack。JessiewantedtoknowthedistancetoRingwood。Thensilencefellagain。
Mr。Hoopdriver，veryuncomfortableandstudyinganeasybearing，lookedagainatthebreakfastthingsandthenidlyliftedthecornerofthetableclothontheendsofhisfingers，andregardedit。\"Fifteenthree，\"hethought，privately。
\"Whydoyoudothat？\"saidJessie。
\"WHAT？\"saidHoopdriver，droppingthetableclothconvulsively。
\"Lookattheclothlikethat。Isawyoudoityesterday，too。\"
Mr。Hoopdriver’sfacebecamequiteabrightred。Hebeganpullinghismoustachenervously。\"Iknow，\"hesaid。\"Iknow。It’saqueerhabit，Iknow。Butoutthere，youknow，there’snativeservants，youknow，and——it’saqueerthingtotalkabout——butonehastolookatthingstosee，don’ty’know，whetherthey’requitecleanornot。It’sgottobeahabit。\"
\"Howodd！\"saidJessie。
\"Isn’tit？\"mumbledHoopdriver。
\"IfIwereaSherlockHolmes，\"saidJessie，\"IsupposeIcouldhavetoldyouwereacolonialfromlittlethingslikethat。Butanyhow，Iguessedit，didn’tI？\"
\"Yes，\"saidHoopdriver，inamelancholytone，\"youguessedit。\"
Whynotseizetheopportunityforaneatconfession，andadd，\"unhappilyinthiscaseyouguessedwrong。\"Didshesuspect？
Then，atthepsychologicalmoment，thegirlbumpedthedooropenwithhertrayandbroughtinthecoffeeandscrambledeggs。
\"Iamratherluckywithmyintuitions，sometimes，\"saidJessie。
Remorsethathadbeenaccumulatinginhismindfortwodayssurgedtothetopofhismind。Whatashabbyliarhewas！
And，besides，hemustsoonerorlater，inevitably，givehimselfaway。
XXXV
Mr。Hoopdriverhelpedtheeggsandthen，insteadofbeginning，satwithhischeekonhishand，watchingJessiepouroutthecoffee。Hisearswereabrightred，andhiseyesbright。Hetookhiscoffeecupclumsily，clearedhisthroat，suddenlyleantbackinhischair，andthrusthishandsdeepintohispockets。\"I’lldoit，\"hesaidaloud。
\"Dowhat？\"saidJessie，lookingupinsurpriseoverthecoffeepot。Shewasjustbeginningherscrambledegg。
\"Ownup。\"
\"Ownwhat？\"
\"MissMilton——I’maliar。\"Heputhisheadononesideandregardedherwithafrownoftremendousresolution。Theninmeasuredaccents，andmovinghisheadslowlyfromsidetoside，heannounced，\"Ay’maderaper。\"
\"You’readraper？Ithought——\"
\"Youthoughtwrong。Butit’sboundtocomeup。Pins，attitude，habits——It’splainenough。
\"I’madraper’sassistantletoutforaten—daysholiday。Jestadraper’sassistant。Notmuch，isit？Acounter—jumper。\"
\"Adraper’sassistantisn’tapositiontobeashamedof，\"shesaid，recovering，andnotquiteunderstandingyetwhatthisallmeant。
\"Yes，itis，\"hesaid，\"foraman，inthiscountrynow。Tobejustanotherman’shand，asIam。Tohavetowearwhatclothesyouaretold，andgotochurchtopleasecustomers，andwork——There’snootherkindofmenstandsuchhours。Adrunkenbricklayer’sakingtoit。\"
\"Butwhyareyoutellingmethisnow？\"
\"It’simportantyoushouldknowatonce。\"
\"But，Mr。Benson——\"
\"Thatisn’tall。Ifyoudon’tmindmyspeakingaboutmyselfabit，there’safewthingsI’dliketotellyou。Ican’tgoondeceivingyou。Myname’snotBenson。WHYItoldyouBenson，I
DON’Tknow。ExceptthatI’makindoffool。Well——IwantedsomehowtoseemmorethanIwas。Myname’sHoopdriver。\"
\"Yes？\"
\"AndthataboutSouthAfrica——andthatlion。\"
\"Well？\"
\"Lies。\"
\"Lies！\"
Andthediscoveryofdiamondsontheostrichfarm。Liestoo。Andallthereminiscencesofthegiraffes——liestoo。Ineverrodeonnogiraffes。I’dbeafraid。\"
Helookedatherwithakindofsullensatisfaction。Hehadeasedhisconscience，anyhow。Sheregardedhimininfiniteperplexity。
Thiswasanewsidealtogethertotheman。\"ButWHY，\"shebegan。
\"WhydidItellyousuchthings？_I_don’tknow。Sillysortofchap，Iexpect。IsupposeIwantedtoimpressyou。Butsomehow，now，Iwantyoutoknowthetruth。\"
Silence。Breakfastuntouched。\"IthoughtI’dtellyou，\"saidMr。
Hoopdriver。\"Isupposeit’ssnobbishnessandallthatkindofthing，asmuchasanything。Ilayawakeprettynearalllastnightthinkingaboutmyself;thinkingwhatagot—upimitationofamanIwas，andallthat。\"
\"Andyouhaven’tanydiamondshares，andyouarenotgoingintoParliament，andyou’renot——\"
\"AllLies，\"saidHoopdriver，inasepulchralvoice。\"Liesfrombeginningtoend。’OwIcametotell’emIDON’Tknow。\"
Shestaredathimblankly。
\"IneverseteyesonAfricainmylife，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver，completingtheconfession。Thenhepulledhisrighthandfromhispocket，andwiththenonchalanceofonetowhomthebitternessofdeathispassed，begantodrinkhiscoffee。
\"It’salittlesurprising，\"beganJessie，vaguely。
\"Thinkitover，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver。\"I’msorryfromthebottomofmyheart。\"
Andthenbreakfastproceededinsilence。Jessieateverylittle，andseemedlostinthought。Mr。Hoopdriverwassoovercomebycontritionandanxietythatheconsumedanextraordinarilylargebreakfastoutofpurenervousness，andatehisscrambledeggsforthemostpartwiththespoonthatbelongedproperlytothemarmalade。Hiseyesweregloomilydowncast。Sheglancedathimthroughhereyelashes。Onceortwiceshestruggledwithlaughter，onceortwicesheseemedtobeindignant。
\"Idon’tknowwhattothink，\"shesaidatlast。\"Idon’tknowwhattomakeofyou——brotherChris。Ithought，doyouknow？thatyouwereperfectlyhonest。Andsomehow——\"
\"Well？\"
\"Ithinksostill。\"
\"Honest——withallthoselies！\"
\"Iwonder。\"
\"Idon’t，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver。\"I’mfairashamedofmyself。Butanyhow——I’vestoppeddeceivingyou。\"
\"ITHOUGHT，\"saidtheYoungLadyinGrey，\"thatstoryofthelion——\"
\"Lord！\"saidMr。Hoopdriver。\"Don’tremindmeofTHAT。\"
\"Ithought，somehow，IFELT，thatthethingsyousaiddidn’tringquitetrue。\"Shesuddenlybrokeoutinlaughter，attheexpressionofhisface。\"OfCOURSEyouarehonest，\"shesaid。
\"HowcouldIeverdoubtit？Asif_I_hadneverpretended！Iseeitallnow。\"
Abruptlysherose，andextendedherhandacrossthebreakfastthings。Helookedatherdoubtfully，andsawthedancingfriendlinessinhereyes。Hescarcelyunderstoodatfirst。Herose，holdingthemarmaladespoon，andtookherprofferedhandwithabjecthumility。\"Lord，\"hebrokeout，\"ifyouaren’tenough——butthere！\"
\"Iseeitallnow。\"Abrilliantinspirationhadsuddenlyobscuredherhumour。Shesatdownsuddenly，andhesatdowntoo。\"Youdidit，\"shesaid，\"becauseyouwantedtohelpme。AndyouthoughtI
wastooConventionaltotakehelpfromoneImightthinkmysocialinferior。\"
\"Thatwaspartlyit，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver。
\"Howyoumisunderstoodme！\"shesaid。
\"Youdon’tmind？\"
\"Itwasnobleofyou。ButIamsorry，\"shesaid，\"youshouldthinkmelikelytobeashamedofyoubecauseyoufollowadecenttrade。\"
\"Ididn’tknowatfirst，yousee，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver。
Andhesubmittedmeeklytoarestorationofhisself—respect。Hewasasusefulacitizenascouldbe，——itwasproposedandcarried，——andhislyingwasofthenoblest。Andsothebreakfastconcludedmuchmorehappilythanhisbrightestexpectation，andtheyrodeoutofruddylittleBlandfordasthoughnoshadowofanysorthadcomebetweenthem。
XXXVI
Astheyweresittingbytheroadsideamongthepinetreeshalf—wayupastretchofhillbetweenWimborneandRingwood，however，Mr。Hoopdriverreopenedthequestionofhisworldlyposition。
\"Juthink，\"hebeganabruptly，removingameditativecigarettefromhismouth，\"thatadraper’sshopmanISadecentcitizen？\"
\"Whynot？\"
\"Whenheputspeopleoffwithwhattheydon’tquitewant，forinstance？\"
\"Needhedothat？\"
\"Salesmanship，\"saidHoopdriver。\"Wouldn’tgetacribifhedidn’t。——It’snogoodyourarguing。It’snotaparticularlyhonestnoraparticularlyusefultrade;it’snotveryhighup;
there’snofreedomandnoleisure——seventoeight—thirtyeverydayintheweek;don’tleavemuchedgetoliveon，doesit？——realworkmenlaughatusandeducatedchapslikebankclerksandsolicitors’clerkslookdownonus。Youlookrespectableoutside，andinsideyouarepackedindormitorieslikeconvicts，fedonbreadandbutterandbulliedlikeslaves。You’rejustsuperiorenoughtofeelthatyou’renotsuperior。Withoutcapitalthere’snoprospects;onedraperinahundreddon’tevenearnenoughtomarryon;andifheDOESmarry，hisG。V。canjustusehimtoblackbootsifhelikes，andhedaren’tputhisbackup。That’sdrapery！Andyoutellmetobecontented。WouldYOUbecontentedifyouwasashopgirl？\"
Shedidnotanswer。Shelookedathimwithdistressinherbrowneyes，andheremainedgloomilyinpossessionofthefield。
Presentlyhespoke。\"I’vebeenthinking，\"hesaid，andstopped。
Sheturnedherface，restinghercheekonthepalmofherhand。
Therewasalightinhereyesthatmadetheexpressionofthemtender。Mr。Hoopdriverhadnotlookedinherfacewhilehehadtalked。Hehadregardedthegrass，andpointedhisremarkswithredknuckledhandsheldopenandpalmsupwards。Nowtheyhunglimplyoverhisknees。
\"Well？\"shesaid。
\"Iwasthinkingitthismorning，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver。
\"Yes？\"
\"Ofcourseit’ssilly。\"\"Well？\"
\"It’slikethis。I’mtwenty—three，about。Ihadmyschoolingallrighttofifteen，say。Well，thatleavesmeeightyearsbehind。——Isittoolate？Iwasn’tsobackward。Ididalgebra，andLatinuptoauxiliaryverbs，andFrenchgenders。Igotakindofgrounding。\"
\"Andnowyoumean，shouldyougoonworking？\"
\"Yes，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver。\"That’sit。Youcan’tdomuchatdraperywithoutcapital，youknow。ButifIcouldgetreallyeducated。I’vethoughtsometimes……\"
\"Whynot？saidtheYoungLadyinGrey。
Mr。Hoopdriverwassurprisedtoseeitinthatlight。\"Youthink？\"hesaid。\"Ofcourse。YouareaMan。Youarefree——\"Shewarmed。\"IwishIwereyoutohavethechanceofthatstruggle。\"
\"AmIManENOUGH？\"saidMr。Hoopdriveraloud，butaddressinghimself。\"There’sthateightyears，\"hesaidtoher。
\"Youcanmakeitup。Whatyoucalleducatedmen——They’renotgoingon。Youcancatchthem。Theyarequitesatisfied。Playinggolf，andthinkingofcleverthingstosaytowomenlikemystepmother，anddiningout。You’reinfrontofthemalreadyinonething。Theythinktheyknoweverything。Youdon’t。Andtheyknowsuchlittlethings。\"
\"Lord！\"saidMr。Hoopdriver。\"Howyouencourageafellow！\"
\"IfIcouldonlyhelpyou，\"shesaid，andleftaneloquenthiatus。Hebecamepensiveagain。
\"It’sprettyevidentyoudon’tthinkmuchofadraper，\"hesaidabruptly。
Anotherinterval。\"Hundredsofmen，\"shesaid，\"havecomefromtheverylowestranksoflife。TherewasBurns，aploughman;andHughMiller，astonemason;andplentyofothers。Dodsleywasafootman——\"
\"Butdrapers！We’retoosortofshabbygenteeltorise。Ourcoatsandcuffsmightgetcrumpled——\"
\"Wasn’tthereaClarkewhowrotetheology？Hewasadraper。\"
\"Therewasonestartedasewingcotton，theonlyoneIeverheardtellof。\"
\"Haveyoueverread’HeartsInsurgent’？\"
\"Never，\"saidMr。Hoopdriver。Hedidnotwaitforhercontext，butsuddenlybrokeoutwithanaccountofhisliteraryrequirements。\"Thefactis——I’vereadpreciouslittle。Onedon’tgetmuchofachance，situatedasIam。Wehavealibraryatbusiness，andI’vegonethroughthat。MostBesantI’veread，andalotofMrs。Braddon’sandRiderHaggardandMarieCorelli——and，well——aOuidaorso。They’regoodstories，ofcourse，andfirst—classwriters，buttheydidn’tseemtohavemuchtodowithme。Butthere’sheapsofbooksonehearstalkedabout，IHAVEN’T
read。\"
\"Don’tyoureadanyotherbooksbutnovels？\"
\"Scarcelyever。Onegetstiredafterbusiness，andyoucan’tgetthebooks。Ihavebeentosomeextensionlectures，ofcourse，’LizabethanDramatists，’itwas，butitseemedalittlehigh—flown，youknow。AndIwentanddidwood—carvingatthesameplace。Butitdidn’tseemleadingnowhere，andIcutmythumbandchuckedit。\"
Hemadeadepressingspectacle，withhisfaceanxiousandhishandslimp。\"Itmakesmesick，\"hesaid，\"tothinkhowI’vebeenfooledwith。MyoldschoolmasteroughttohaveajuicedHIDING。
He’sathief。Hepretendedtoundertaketomakeamanofme，andbe’sstoletwenty—threeyearsofmylife，filledmeupwithscrapsandsweepings。HereIam！Idon’tKNOWanything，andI
can’tDOanything，andallthelearningtimeisover。\"
\"Isit？\"shesaid;buthedidnotseemtohearher。\"Myo’
peopledidn’tknowanybetter，andwentandpaidthirtypoundspremium——thirtypoundsdowntohavememadeTHIS。TheG。V。
promisedtoteachmethetrade，andhenevertaughtmeanythingbuttobeaHand。It’sthewaytheydowithdraper’sapprentices。
Ifeveryswindlerwaslockedup——well，you’dhavenowheretobuytapeandcotton。It’sallverywelltobringupBurnsandthosechaps，butI’mnotthatmake。YetI’mnotsuchmuckthatImightnothavebeenbetter——withteaching。Iwonderwhatthechapswhosneerandlaughatsuchasmewouldbeifthey’dbeenfooledaboutasI’vebeen。Attwenty—three——it’salongstart。\"
Helookedupwithawintrysmile，asadderandwiserHoopdriverindeedthanhimofthegloriousimaginings。\"It’sYOUdonethis，\"
hesaid。\"You’rereal。AnditsetsmethinkingwhatIreallyam，andwhatImighthavebeen。Supposeitwasalldifferent——\"
\"MAKEitdifferent。\"
\"How？\"
\"WORK。Stopplayingatlife。Faceitlikeaman。\"
\"Ah！\"saidHoopdriver，glancingatheroutofthecornersofhiseyes。\"Andeventhen——\"
\"No！It’snotmuchgood。I’mbeginningtoolate。\"
Andthere，inblanklythoughtfulsilence，thatconversationended。
INTHENEWFOREST
XXXVII
AtRingwoodtheylunched，andJessiemetwithadisappointment。
Therewasnoletterforheratthepostoffice。Oppositethehotel，TheChequeredCareer，wasamachineshopwithaconspicuouslysecond—handMarlboroughClubtandemtricycledisplayedinthewindow，togetherwiththeannouncementthatbicyclesandtricycleswereonhirewithin。TheestablishmentwasimpressedonMr。Hoopdriver’smindbytheproprietor’sactionincomingacrosstheroadandnarrowlyinspectingtheirmachines。
Hisactionrevivedanumberofdisagreeableimpressions，but，happily，cametonothing。Whiletheywerestilllunching，atallclergyman，withaheatedface，enteredtheroomandsatdownatthetablenexttotheirs。Hewasinakindofholidaycostume;
thatistosay，hehadamorethanusuallyhighcollar，fastenedbehindandrathertheworsefortheweather，andhislong—tailcoathadbeenreplacedbyablackjacketofquiteremarkablebrevity。Hehadfadedbrownshoesonhisfeet，histrouserlegsweregreywithdust，andheworeahatofpiebaldstrawintheplaceofthecustomarysoftfelt。Hewasevidentlysociallyinclined。
