第17章

Agentleman！ What，o’thewoolpack？orthesugar—chest？ Orlistsofvelvet？whichis’t，pound，oryard， Youvendyourgentryby？ BEGGAR’SBUSH。 THEREarefewplacesmorefavorabletothestudyofcharacterthan anEnglishcountrychurch。Iwasoncepassingafewweeksatthe seatofafriend，whoresidedinthevicinityofone，theappearance ofwhichparticularlystruckmyfancy。Itwasoneofthoserich morselsofquaintantiquitywhichgivesuchapeculiarcharmto Englishlandscape。Itstoodinthemidstofacountryfilledwith ancientfamilies，andcontained，withinitscoldandsilentaisles， thecongregateddustofmanynoblegenerations。Theinteriorwalls wereincrustedwithmonumentsofeveryageandstyle。Thelight streamedthroughwindowsdimmedwitharmorialbearings，richly emblazonedinstainedglass。Invariouspartsofthechurchweretombs ofknights，andhigh—borndames，ofgorgeousworkmanship，withtheir effigiesincoloredmarble。Oneverysidetheeyewasstruckwithsome instanceofaspiringmortality；somehaughtymemorialwhichhuman pridehaderectedoveritskindreddust，inthistempleofthemost humbleofallreligions。 Thecongregationwascomposedoftheneighboringpeopleofrank，who satinpews，sumptuouslylinedandcushioned，furnishedwith richly—gildedprayer—books，anddecoratedwiththeirarmsuponthepew doors；ofthevillagersandpeasantry，whofilledthebackseats， andasmallgallerybesidetheorgan；andofthepooroftheparish， whowererangedonbenchesintheaisles。 Theservicewasperformedbyasnufflingwell—fedvicar，whohada snugdwellingnearthechurch。Hewasaprivilegedguestatallthe tablesoftheneighborhood，andhadbeenthekeenestfox—hunterinthe country；untilageandgoodlivinghaddisabledhimfromdoingany thingmorethanridetoseethehoundsthrowoff，andmakeoneat thehuntingdinner。 Undertheministryofsuchapastor，Ifounditimpossibletoget intothetrainofthoughtsuitabletothetimeandplace：so， having，likemanyotherfeebleChristians，compromisedwithmy conscience，bylayingthesinofmyowndelinquencyatanother person’sthreshold，Ioccupiedmyselfbymakingobservationsonmy neighbors。 IwasasyetastrangerinEngland，andcurioustonoticethe mannersofitsfashionableclasses。Ifound，asusual，thatthere wastheleastpretensionwheretherewasthemostacknowledgedtitle torespect。Iwasparticularlystruck，forinstance，withthefamily ofanoblemanofhighrank，consistingofseveralsonsand daughters。Nothingcouldbemoresimpleandunassumingthantheir appearance，Theygenerallycametochurchintheplainestequipage， andoftenonfoot。Theyoungladieswouldstopandconverseinthe kindestmannerwiththepeasantry，caressthechildren，andlisten tothestoriesofthehumblecottagers。Theircountenanceswereopen andbeautifullyfair，withanexpressionofhighrefinement，but，at thesametime，afrankcheerfulness，andanengagingaffability。Their brothersweretall，andelegantlyformed。Theyweredressed fashionably，butsimply；withstrictneatnessandpropriety，but withoutanymannerismorfoppishness。Theirwholedemeanorwaseasy andnatural，withthatloftygrace，andnoblefrankness，whichbespeak freebornsoulsthathaveneverbeencheckedintheirgrowthby feelingsofinferiority。Thereisahealthfulhardinessaboutreal dignity，thatneverdreadscontactandcommunionwithothers， howeverhumble。Itisonlyspuriouspridethatismorbidand sensitive，andshrinksfromeverytouch。Iwaspleasedtoseethe mannerinwhichtheywouldconversewiththepeasantryaboutthose ruralconcernsandfield—sports，inwhichthegentlemenofthis countrysomuchdelight。Intheseconversationstherewasneither haughtinessontheonepart，norservilityontheother；andyou wereonlyremindedofthedifferenceofrankbythe。habitual respectofthepeasant。 Incontrasttothesewasthefamilyofawealthycitizen，whohad amassedavastfortune；and，havingpurchasedtheestateandmansion ofaruinednoblemanintheneighborhood，wasendeavoringtoassume allthestyleanddignityofanhereditarylordofthesoil。The familyalwayscametochurchenprince。Theywererolled majesticallyalonginacarriageemblazonedwitharms。Thecrest glitteredinsilverradiancefromeverypartoftheharnesswherea crestcouldpossiblybeplaced。Afatcoachman，inathree—cornered hat，richlylaced，andaflaxenwig，curlingcloseroundhisrosy face，wasseatedonthebox，withasleekDanishdogbesidehim。Two footmen，ingorgeousliveries，withhugebouquets，andgold—headed canes，lolledbehind。Thecarriageroseandsunkonitslongsprings withpeculiarstatelinessofmotion。Theveryhorseschampedtheir bits，archedtheirnecks，andglancedtheireyesmoreproudlythan commonhorses；eitherbecausetheyhadcaughtalittleofthefamily feeling，orwerereinedupmoretightlythanordinary。 Icouldnotbutadmirethestylewithwhichthissplendidpageant wasbroughtuptothegateofthechurch—yard。Therewasavasteffect producedattheturningofanangleofthewall；—agreatsmacking ofthewhip，strainingandscramblingofhorses，glisteningof harness，andflashingofwheelsthroughgravel。Thiswasthemomentof triumphandvainglorytothecoachman。Thehorseswereurgedand checkeduntiltheywerefrettedintoafoam。Theythrewouttheirfeet inaprancingtrot，dashingaboutpebblesateverystep。Thecrowd ofvillagerssaunteringquietlytochurch，openedprecipitatelytothe rightandleft，gapinginvacantadmiration。Onreachingthegate，the horseswerepulledupwithasuddennessthatproducedanimmediate stop，andalmostthrewthemontheirhaunches。 Therewasanextraordinaryhurryofthefootmantoalight，pulldown thesteps，andprepareeverythingforthedescentonearthofthis augustfamily。Theoldcitizenfirstemergedhisroundredfacefrom outthedoor，lookingabouthimwiththepompousairofaman accustomedtoruleon’Change，andshaketheStockMarketwitha nod。Hisconsort，afine，fleshy，comfortabledame，followedhim。 Thereseemed，Imustconfess，butlittleprideinhercomposition。She wasthepictureofbroad，honest，vulgarenjoyment。Theworldwent wellwithher；andshelikedtheworld。Shehadfineclothes，afine house，afinecarriage，finechildren，everythingwasfineabouther： itwasnothingbutdrivingabout，andvisitingandfeasting。Life wastoheraperpetualrevel；itwasonelongLordMayor’sday。 Twodaughterssucceededtothisgoodlycouple。Theycertainlywere handsome；buthadasuperciliousair，thatchilledadmiration，and disposedthespectatortobecritical。Theywereultra—fashionable indress；and，thoughnoonecoulddenytherichnessoftheir decorations，yettheirappropriatenessmightbequestionedamidst thesimplicityofacountrychurch。Theydescendedloftilyfromthe carriage，andmovedupthelineofpeasantrywithastepthatseemed daintyofthesoilittrodon。Theycastanexcursiveglancearound， thatpassedcoldlyovertheburlyfacesofthepeasantry，untilthey mettheeyesofthenobleman’sfamily，whentheircountenances immediatelybrightenedintosmiles，andtheymadethemostprofound andelegantcourtesies，whichwerereturnedinamannerthatshowed theywerebutslightacquaintances。 Imustnotforgetthetwosonsofthisaspiringcitizen，whocameto churchinadashingcurricle，withoutriders。Theywerearrayedinthe extremityofthemode，withallthatpedantryofdresswhichmarksthe manofquestionablepretensionstostyle。Theykeptentirelyby themselves，eyeingeveryoneaskancethatcamenearthem，asif measuringhisclaimstorespectability；yettheywerewithout conversation，excepttheexchangeofanoccasionalcantphrase。They evenmovedartificially；fortheirbodies，incompliancewiththe capriceoftheday，hadbeendisciplinedintotheabsenceofall easeandfreedom。Arthaddoneeverythingtoaccomplishthemasmen offashion，butnaturehaddeniedthemthenamelessgrace。Theywere vulgarlyshaped，likemenformedforthecommonpurposesoflife， andhadthatairofsuperciliousassumptionwhichisneverseeninthe truegentleman。 Ihavebeenratherminuteindrawingthepicturesofthesetwo families，becauseIconsideredthemspecimensofwhatisoftentobe metwithinthiscountry—theunpretendinggreat，andthearrogant little。Ihavenorespectfortitledrank，unlessitbeaccompanied withtruenobilityofsoul；butIhaveremarkedinallcountrieswhere artificialdistinctionsexist，thattheveryhighestclassesare alwaysthemostcourteousandunassuming。Thosewhoarewellassured oftheirownstandingareleastapttotrespassonthatofothers； whereasnothingissooffensiveastheaspiringsofvulgarity，which thinkstoelevateitselfbyhumiliatingitsneighbor。 AsIhavebroughtthesefamiliesintocontrast，Imustnotice theirbehaviorinchurch。Thatofthenobleman’sfamilywasquiet， serious，andattentive。Notthattheyappearedtohaveanyfervorof devotion，butratherarespectforsacredthings，andsacredplaces， inseparablefromgoodbreeding。Theothers，onthecontrary，wereina perpetualflutterandwhisper；theybetrayedacontinualconsciousness offinery，andasorryambitionofbeingthewondersofarural congregation。 Theoldgentlemanwastheonlyonereallyattentivetothe service。Hetookthewholeburdenoffamilydevotionuponhimself， standingboltupright，andutteringtheresponseswithaloudvoice thatmightbeheardalloverthechurch。Itwasevidentthathewas oneofthosethoroughchurchandkingmen，whoconnecttheideaof devotionandloyalty；whoconsidertheDeity，somehoworother，ofthe governmentparty，andreligion\"averyexcellentsortofthing，that oughttobecountenancedandkeptup。\" Whenhejoinedsoloudlyintheservice，itseemedmorebywayof exampletothelowerorders，toshowthemthat，thoughsogreatand wealthy，hewasnotabovebeingreligious；asIhaveseenaturtle—fed aldermanswallowpubliclyabasinofcharitysoup，smackinghislips ateverymouthful，andpronouncingit\"excellentfoodforthepoor。\" Whentheservicewasatanend，Iwascurioustowitnesstheseveral exitsofmygroups。Theyoungnoblemenandtheirsisters，astheday wasfine，preferredstrollinghomeacrossthefields，chattingwith thecountrypeopleastheywent。Theothersdepartedastheycame， ingrandparade。Againweretheequipageswheeleduptothegate。 Therewasagainthesmackingofwhips，theclatteringofhoofs，and theglitteringofharness。Thehorsesstartedoffalmostatabound； thevillagersagainhurriedtorightandleft；thewheelsthrewupa cloudofdust；andtheaspiringfamilywasraptoutofsightina whirlwind。 THEEND。 1819—20 THESKETCHBOOK THEINNKITCHEN byWashingtonIrving ShallInottakemineeaseinmineinn？ FALSTAFF。 DURINGajourneythatIoncemadethroughtheNetherlands，Ihad arrivedoneeveningatthePommed’Or，theprincipalinnofasmall Flemishvillage。Itwasafterthehourofthetabled’hote，sothat Iwasobligedtomakeasolitarysupperfromtherelicsofits amplerboard。Theweatherwaschilly；Iwasseatedaloneinoneendof agreatgloomydining—room，and，myrepastbeingover，Ihadthe prospectbeforemeofalongdullevening，withoutanyvisiblemeans ofenliveningit。Isummonedminehost，andrequestedsomethingto read；hebroughtmethewholeliterarystockofhishousehold，aDutch familyBible，analmanacinthesamelanguage，andanumberofold Parisnewspapers。AsIsatdozingoveroneofthelatter，reading oldandstalecriticisms，myearwasnowandthenstruckwithbursts oflaughterwhichseemedtoproceedfromthekitchen。Everyonethat hastravelledonthecontinentmustknowhowfavoritearesortthe kitchenofacountryinnistothemiddleandinferiororderof travellers；particularlyinthatequivocalkindofweather，whena firebecomesagreeabletowardevening。Ithrewasidethenewspaper， andexploredmywaytothekitchen，totakeapeepatthegroupthat appearedtobesomerry。Itwascomposedpartlyoftravellerswho hadarrivedsomehoursbeforeinadiligence，andpartlyofthe usualattendantsandhangers—onofinns。Theywereseatedrounda greatburnishedstove，thatmighthavebeenmistakenforanaltar， atwhichtheywereworshipping。Itwascoveredwithvariouskitchen vesselsofresplendentbrightness；amongwhichsteamedandhisseda hugecoppertea—kettle。Alargelampthrewastrongmassoflightupon thegroup，bringingoutmanyoddfeaturesinstrongrelief。Itsyellow rayspartiallyilluminedthespaciouskitchen，dyingduskilyawayinto remotecorners；exceptwheretheysettledinmellowradianceonthe broadsideofaflitchofbacon，orwerereflectedbackfrom well—scouredutensils，thatgleamedfromthemidstofobscurity。A strappingFlemishlass，withlonggoldenpendantsinherears，anda necklacewithagoldenheartsuspendedtoit，wasthepresiding priestessofthetemple。 Manyofthecompanywerefurnishedwithpipes，andmostofthemwith somekindofeveningpotation。Ifoundtheirmirthwasoccasionedby anecdotes，whichalittleswarthyFrenchman，withadryweazenface andlargewhiskers，wasgivingofhisloveadventures；attheendof eachofwhichtherewasoneofthoseburstsofhonestunceremonious laughter，inwhichamanindulgesinthattempleoftrueliberty，an inn。 AsIhadnobettermodeofgettingthroughatediousblustering evening，Itookmyseatnearthestove，andlistenedtoavarietyof travellers’tales，someveryextravagant，andmostverydull。Allof them，however，havefadedfrommytreacherousmemoryexceptone，which Iwillendeavortorelate。Ifear，however，itderiveditschief zestfromthemannerinwhichitwastold，andthepeculiarairand appearanceofthenarrator。HewasacorpulentoldSwiss，whohad thelookofaveterantraveller。Hewasdressedinatarnishedgreen travelling—jacket，withabroadbeltroundhiswaist，andapairof overalls，withbuttonsfromthehipstotheankles。Hewasofa full，rubicundcountenance，withadoublechin，aquilinenose，anda pleasant，twinklingeye。Hishairwaslight，andcurledfromunder anoldgreenvelvettravelling—capstuckononesideofhishead。He wasinterruptedmorethanoncebythearrivalofguests，orthe remarksofhisauditors；andpausednowandthentoreplenishhis pipe；atwhichtimeshehadgenerallyaroguishleer，andaslyjoke forthebuxomkitchen—maid。 Iwishmyreaderscouldimaginetheoldfellowlollinginahuge arm—chair，onearmakimbo，theotherholdingacuriouslytwisted tobaccopipe，formedofgenuineecumedemer，decoratedwithsilver chainandsilkentassel—hisheadcockedononeside，anda whimsicalcutoftheeyeoccasionally，asherelatedthefollowing story。 THEEND。 1819—20 THESKETCHBOOK THEMUTABILITYOFLITERATURE ACOLLOQUYINWESTMINSTERABBEY byWashingtonIrving Iknowthatallbeneaththemoondecays， Andwhatbymortalsinthisworldisbrought， Intime’sgreatperiodshallreturntonought。 Iknowthatallthemuse’sheavenlylays， Withtoilofspritewhicharesodearlybought， Asidlesounds，offewornonearesought， Thatthereisnothinglighterthanmerepraise。 DRUMMONDOFHAWTHORNDEN。 THEREarecertainhalf—dreamingmoodsofmind，inwhichwenaturally stealawayfromnoiseandglare，andseeksomequiethaunt，wherewe mayindulgeourreveriesandbuildouraircastlesundisturbed。In suchamoodIwasloiteringabouttheoldgraycloistersof WestminsterAbbey，enjoyingthatluxuryofwanderingthoughtwhichone isapttodignifywiththenameofreflection；whensuddenlyan interruptionofmadcapboysfromWestminsterschool，playingat foot—ball，brokeinuponthemonasticstillnessoftheplace，making thevaultedpassagesandmoulderingtombsechowiththeirmerriment。I soughttotakerefugefromtheirnoisebypenetratingstilldeeper intothesolitudesofthepile，andappliedtooneofthevergers foradmissiontothelibrary。Heconductedmethroughaportalrich withthecrumblingsculptureofformerages，whichopenedupona gloomypassageleadingtothechapter—houseandthechamberinwhich doomsdaybookisdeposited。Justwithinthepassageisasmalldooron theleft。Tothisthevergerappliedakey；itwasdoublelocked， andopenedwithsomedifficulty，asifseldomused。Wenowascended adarknarrowstaircase，and，passingthroughaseconddoor，entered thelibrary。 Ifoundmyselfinaloftyantiquehall，theroofsupportedby massivejoistsofoldEnglishoak。Itwassoberlylightedbyarow ofGothicwindowsataconsiderableheightfromthefloor，andwhich apparentlyopenedupontheroofsofthecloisters。Anancient pictureofsomereverenddignitaryofthechurchinhisrobeshung overthefireplace。Aroundthehallandinasmallgallerywerethe books，arrangedincarvedoakencases。Theyconsistedprincipallyof oldpolemicalwriters，andweremuchmorewornbytimethanuse。In thecentreofthelibrarywasasolitarytablewithtwoorthreebooks onit，aninkstandwithoutink，andafewpensparchedbylongdisuse。 Theplaceseemedfittedforquietstudyandprofoundmeditation。It wasburieddeepamongthemassivewallsoftheabbey，andshutupfrom thetumultoftheworld。Icouldonlyhearnowandthentheshouts oftheschool—boysfaintlyswellingfromthecloisters，andthe soundofabelltollingforprayers，echoingsoberlyalongtheroofs oftheabbey。Bydegreestheshoutsofmerrimentgrewfainterand fainter，andatlengthdiedaway；thebellceasedtotoll，anda profoundsilencereignedthroughtheduskyhall。 Ihadtakendownalittlethickquarto，curiouslyboundin parchment，withbrassclasps，andseatedmyselfatthetableina venerableelbow—chair。Insteadofreading，however，Iwasbeguiled bythesolemnmonasticair，andlifelessquietoftheplace，intoa trainofmusing。AsIlookedaroundupontheoldvolumesintheir moulderingcovers，thusrangedontheshelves，andapparentlynever disturbedintheirrepose，Icouldnotbutconsiderthelibraryakind ofliterarycatacomb，whereauthors，likemummies，arepiously entombed，andlefttoblackenandmoulderindustyoblivion。 Howmuch，thoughtI，haseachofthesevolumes，nowthrustaside withsuchindifference，costsomeachinghead！howmanywearydays！ howmanysleeplessnights！Howhavetheirauthorsburiedthemselvesin thesolitudeofcellsandcloisters；shutthemselvesupfromthe faceofman，andthestillmoreblessedfaceofnature；anddevoted themselvestopainfulresearchandintensereflection！Andallfor what？tooccupyaninchofdustyshelf—tohavethetitleoftheir worksreadnowandtheninafutureage，bysomedrowsychurchmanor casualstragglerlikemyself；andinanotheragetobelost，evento remembrance。Suchistheamountofthisboastedimmortality。Amere temporaryrumor，alocalsound；likethetoneofthatbellwhichhas justtolledamongthesetowers，fillingtheearforamoment— lingeringtransientlyinecho—andthenpassingawaylikeathingthat wasnot！ WhileIsathalfmurmuring，halfmeditatingtheseunprofitable speculationswithmyheadrestingonmyhand，Iwasthrummingwiththe otherhanduponthequarto，untilIaccidentallyloosenedthe clasps；when，tomyutterastonishment，thelittlebookgavetwoor threeyawns，likeoneawakingfromadeepsleep；thenahuskyhem；and atlengthbegantotalk。Atfirstitsvoicewasveryhoarseand broken，beingmuchtroubledbyacobwebwhichsomestudiousspiderhad wovenacrossit；andhavingprobablycontractedacoldfromlong exposuretothechillsanddampsoftheabbey。Inashorttime， however，itbecamemoredistinct，andIsoonfounditanexceedingly fluentconversablelittletome。Itslanguage，tobesure，wasrather quaintandobsolete，anditspronunciation，what，inthepresent day，wouldbedeemedbarbarous；butIshallendeavor，asfarasIam able，torenderitinmodernparlance。 Itbeganwithrailingsabouttheneglectoftheworld—aboutmerit beingsufferedtolanguishinobscurity，andothersuchcommonplace topicsofliteraryrepining，andcomplainedbitterlythatithadnot beenopenedformorethantwocenturies。Thatthedeanonlylookednow andthenintothelibrary，sometimestookdownavolumeortwo， trifledwiththemforafewmoments，andthenreturnedthemtotheir shelves。\"Whataplaguedotheymean，\"saidthelittlequarto，whichI begantoperceivewassomewhatcholeric，\"whataplaguedotheymean bykeepingseveralthousandvolumesofusshutuphere，andwatchedby asetofoldvergers，likesomanybeautiesinaharem，merelytobe lookedatnowandthenbythedean？Bookswerewrittentogive pleasureandtobeenjoyed；andIwouldhavearulepassedthatthe deanshouldpayeachofusavisitatleastonceayear；orifheis notequaltothetask，letthemonceinawhileturnloosethewhole schoolofWestminsteramongus，thatatanyratewemaynowandthen haveanairing。\" \"Softly，myworthyfriend，\"repliedI，\"youarenotawarehowmuch betteryouareoffthanmostbooksofyourgeneration。Bybeingstored awayinthisancientlibrary，youarelikethetreasuredremainsof thosesaintsandmonarchs，whichlieenshrinedintheadjoining chapels；whiletheremainsofyourcontemporarymortals，lefttothe ordinarycourseofnature，havelongsincereturnedtodust。\" \"Sir，\"saidthelittletome，rufflinghisleavesandlookingbig，\"I waswrittenforalltheworld，notforthebookwormsofanabbey。I wasintendedtocirculatefromhandtohand，likeothergreat contemporaryworks；butherehaveIbeenclaspedupformorethan twocenturies，andmighthavesilentlyfallenapreytotheseworms thatareplayingtheveryvengeancewithmyintestines，ifyouhadnot bychancegivenmeanopportunityofutteringafewlastwords beforeIgotopieces。\" \"Mygoodfriend，\"rejoinedI，\"hadyoubeenlefttothe circulationofwhichyouspeak，youwouldlongerethishavebeenno more。Tojudgefromyourphysiognomy，youarenowwellstrickenin years：veryfewofyourcontemporariescanbeatpresentinexistence； andthosefewowetheirlongevitytobeingimmuredlikeyourselfin oldlibraries；which，suffermetoadd，insteadoflikeningtoharems， youmightmoreproperlyandgratefullyhavecomparedtothose infirmariesattachedtoreligiousestablishments，forthebenefitof theoldanddecrepit，andwhere，byquietfosteringandnoemployment， theyoftenenduretoanamazinglygood—for—nothingoldage。Youtalk ofyourcontemporariesasifincirculation—wheredowemeetwith theirworks？whatdowehearofRobertGroteste，ofLincoln？Noone couldhavetoiledharderthanheforimmortality。Heissaidtohave writtennearlytwohundredvolumes。Hebuilt，atitwere，apyramidof bookstoperpetuatehisname：but，alas！thepyramidhaslongsince fallen，andonlyafewfragmentsarescatteredinvariouslibraries， wheretheyarescarcelydisturbedevenbytheantiquarian。Whatdo wehearofGiraldusCambrensis，thehistorian，antiquary，philosopher， theologian，andpoet？Hedeclinedtwobishoprics，thathemightshut himselfupandwriteforposterity；butposterityneverinquiresafter hislabors。WhatofHenryofHuntingdon，who，besidesalearned historyofEngland，wroteatreatiseonthecontemptoftheworld， whichtheworldhasrevengedbyforgettinghim？Whatisquotedof JosephofExeter，styledthemiracleofhisageinclassical composition？Ofhisthreegreatheroicpoemsoneislostforever， exceptingamerefragment；theothersareknownonlytoafewofthe curiousinliterature；andastohisloveversesandepigrams，they haveentirelydisappeared。WhatisincurrentuseofJohnWallis， theFranciscan，whoacquiredthenameofthetreeoflife？Of WilliamofMalmsbury；—ofSimeonofDurham；—ofBenedictof Peterborough；—ofJohnHanvillofSt。Albans；—of—\"