Ihavetothankcordiallythepublicandmycriticsforthereceptiontheyhavegiventhislittlebook。
DealingwithasubjectthatisfarremovedfromtheroundofEnglishdailylife，itofnecessitylacksthecharmthathangsabouttheidealrepresentationoffamiliarthings，anditsreceptionhasthereforebeenthemorekindly。
Awordofexplanationisnecessary。Twostrangersappearonthescene，andsomehavefanciedthatinthesecondtheyhaveagainthefirst，whoreturnsinanewguise。Whythisshouldbewecannottell；unlessthereisafeelingthatamanshouldnotappearuponthescene，andthendisappear，leavingbehindhimnomoresubstantialtracethanamerebook；thatheshouldreturnlateronashusbandorlover，tofillsomemoreimportantpartthanthatofthemerestimulatorofthought。
Humanlifemaybepaintedaccordingtotwomethods。Thereisthestagemethod。Accordingtothateachcharacterisdulymarshalledatfirst，andticketed；weknowwithanimmutablecertaintythatattherightcriseseachonewillreappearandacthispart，and，whenthecurtainfalls，allwillstandbeforeitbowing。Thereisasenseofsatisfactioninthis，andofcompleteness。Butthereisanothermethod——themethodofthelifewealllead。Herenothingcanbeprophesied。Thereisastrangecomingandgoingoffeet。Menappear，actandre—actuponeachother，andpassaway。Whenthecrisiscomesthemanwhowouldfititdoesnotreturn。Whenthecurtainfallsnooneisready。Whenthefootlightsarebrightesttheyareblownout；andwhatthenameoftheplayisnooneknows。Iftheresitsaspectatorwhoknows，hesitssohighthattheplayersinthegaslightcannothearhisbreathing。Lifemaybepaintedaccordingtoeithermethod；
butthemethodsaredifferent。Thecanonsofcriticismthatbearupontheonecutcruellyupontheother。
Ithasbeensuggestedbyakindcriticthathewouldbetterhavelikedthelittlebookifithadbeenahistoryofwildadventure；ofcattledrivenintoinaccessiblekranzesbyBushmen；\"ofencounterswithraveninglions，andhair—breadthescapes。\"Thiscouldnotbe。SuchworksarebestwritteninPiccadillyorintheStrand：therethegiftsofthecreativeimagination，untrammelledbycontactwithanyfact，mayspreadtheirwings。
But，shouldonesitdowntopaintthescenesamongwhichhehasgrown，hewillfindthatthefactscreepinuponhim。Thosebrilliantphasesandshapeswhichtheimaginationseesinfar—offlandsarenotforhimtoportray。Sadlyhemustsqueezethecolourfromhisbrush，anddipitintothegraypigmentsaroundhim。Hemustpaintwhatliesbeforehim。
R。Iron……
\"Wemustseethefirstimageswhichtheexternalworldcastsuponthedarkmirrorofhismind；ormusthearthefirstwordswhichawakenthesleepingpowersofthought，andstandbyhisearliestefforts，ifwewouldunderstandtheprejudices，thehabits，andthepassionsthatwillrulehislife。Theentiremanis，sotospeak，tobefoundinthecradleofthechild。\"
AlexisdeTocqueville……
Glossary。
SeveralDutchandColonialwordsoccurringinthiswork，thesubjoinedGlossaryisgiven，explainingtheprincipal。
Allewereld！—Gosh！
Aasvogels—Vultures。
Benauwdheid—Indigestion。
Brakje—Alittlecuroflowdegree。
Bultong—Driedmeat。
Coop—HideandSeek。
Inspan—Toharness。
Kapje—Asun—bonnet。
Karoo—ThewidesandyplainsinsomepartsofSouthAfrica。
Karoo—bushes—Thebushesthattaketheplaceofgrassontheseplains。
Kartel—Thewooden—bedfastenedinanox—wagon。
Kloof—Aravine。
Kopje—Asmallhillock，or\"littlehead。\"
Kraal—Thespacesurroundedbyastonewallorhedgedwiththornbranches，intowhichsheeporcattlearedrivenatnight。
Mealies—Indiancorn。
Meerkat—Asmallweazel—likeanimal。
Meiboss—Preservedanddriedapricots。
Nachtmaal—TheLord’sSupper。
Oom—Uncle。
Outspan—Tounharness，oraplaceinthefieldwhereoneunharnesses。
Pap—Porridge。
Predikant—Parson。
Riem—Leatherrope。
Sarsarties—Food。
Sleg—Bad。
Sloot—Adrywatercourse。
Spook—Tohaunt，aghost。
Stamp—block—Awoodenblock，hollowedout，inwhichmealiesareplacedtobepoundedbeforebeingcooked。
Stoep—Porch。
TantorTante—Aunt。
Upsitting—InBoercourtshipthemanandgirlaresupposedtosituptogetherthewholenight。
Veld—Opencountry。
Velschoen—Shoesofundressedleather。
Vrijer—Availableman。
Contents。
Chapter1。I。ShadowsFromChild—Life……
TheWatch。
ThefullAfricanmoonpoureddownitslightfromtheblueskyintothewide，lonelyplain。Thedry，sandyearth，withitscoatingofstuntedkaroobushesafewincheshigh，thelowhillsthatskirtedtheplain，themilk—busheswiththeirlongfinger—likeleaves，allweretouchedbyaweirdandanalmostoppressivebeautyastheylayinthewhitelight。
Inonespotonlywasthesolemnmonotonyoftheplainbroken。Nearthecentreasmallsolitarykopjerose。Aloneitlaythere，aheapofroundironstonespiledoneuponanother，asoversomegiant’sgrave。Hereandthereafewtuftsofgrassorsmallsucculentplantshadsprungupamongitsstones，andontheverysummitaclumpofprickly—pearsliftedtheirthornyarms，andreflected，asfrommirrors，themoonlightontheirbroadfleshyleaves。Atthefootofthekopjelaythehomestead。First，thestone—walledsheepkraalsandKafferhuts；beyondthemthedwelling—house——
asquare，red—brickbuildingwiththatchedroof。Evenonitsbareredwalls，andthewoodenladderthatleduptotheloft，themoonlightcastakindofdreamybeauty，andquiteetherealizedthelowbrickwallthatranbeforethehouse，andwhichinclosedabarepatchofsandandtwostragglingsunflowers。Onthezincroofofthegreatopenwagon—house，ontheroofsoftheoutbuildingsthatjuttedfromitsside，themoonlightglintedwithaquitepeculiarbrightness，tillitseemedthateveryribinthemetalwasofburnishedsilver。
Sleepruledeverywhere，andthehomesteadwasnotlessquietthanthesolitaryplain。
Inthefarmhouse，onhergreatwoodenbedstead，TantSannie，theBoer—
woman，rolledheavilyinhersleep。
Shehadgonetobed，asshealwaysdid，inherclothes，andthenightwaswarmandtheroomclose，andshedreamedbaddreams。Notoftheghostsanddevilsthatsohauntedherwakingthoughts；notofhersecondhusbandtheconsumptiveEnglishman，whosegravelayawaybeyondtheostrich—camps，norofherfirst，theyoungBoer；butonlyofthesheep’strottersshehadeatenforsupperthatnight。Shedreamedthatonestuckfastinherthroat，andsherolledherhugeformfromsidetoside，andsnortedhorribly。
Inthenextroom，wherethemaidhadforgottentoclosetheshutter，thewhitemoonlightfellininaflood，andmadeitlightasday。Thereweretwosmallbedsagainstthewall。Inonelayayellow—hairedchild，withalowforeheadandafaceoffreckles；butthelovingmoonlighthiddefectshereaselsewhere，andshowedonlytheinnocentfaceofachildinitsfirstsweetsleep。
Thefigureinthecompanionbedbelongedofrighttothemoonlight，foritwasofquiteelfin—likebeauty。Thechildhaddroppedhercoveronthefloor，andthemoonlightlookedinatthenakedlittlelimbs。Presentlysheopenedhereyesandlookedatthemoonlightthatwasbathingher。
\"Em！\"shecalledtothesleeperintheotherbed；butreceivednoanswer。
Thenshedrewthecoverfromthefloor，turnedherpillow，andpullingthesheetoverherhead，wenttosleepagain。
Onlyinoneoftheoutbuildingsthatjuttedfromthewagon—housetherewassomeonewhowasnotasleep。
Theroomwasdark；doorandshutterwereclosed；notarayoflightenteredanywhere。TheGermanoverseer，towhomtheroombelonged，laysleepingsoundlyonhisbedinthecorner，hisgreatarmsfolded，andhisbushygreyandblackbeardrisingandfallingonhisbreast。Butoneintheroomwasnotasleep。Twolargeeyeslookedaboutinthedarkness，andtwosmallhandsweresmoothingthepatchworkquilt。Theboy，whosleptonaboxunderthewindow，hadjustawakenedfromhisfirstsleep。Hedrewthequiltuptohischin，sothatlittlepeeredaboveitbutagreatheadofsilkyblackcurlsandthetwoblackeyes。Hestaredaboutinthedarkness。
Nothingwasvisible，noteventheoutlineofoneworm—eatenrafter，norofthedealtable，onwhichlaytheBiblefromwhichhisfatherhadreadbeforetheywenttobed。Noonecouldtellwherethetoolboxwas，andwherethefireplace。Therewassomethingveryimpressivetothechildinthecompletedarkness。
Attheheadofhisfather’sbedhungagreatsilverhuntingwatch。Ittickedloudly。Theboylistenedtoit，andbeganmechanicallytocount。
Tick——tick——one，two，three，four！Helostcountpresently，andonlylistened。Tick——tick——tick——tick！
Itneverwaited；itwentoninexorably；andeverytimeittickedamandied！Heraisedhimselfalittleonhiselbowandlistened。Hewisheditwouldleaveoff。
Howmanytimeshadittickedsincehecametoliedown？Athousandtimes，amilliontimes，perhaps。
Hetriedtocountagain，andsatuptolistenbetter。
\"Dying，dying，dying！\"saidthewatch；\"dying，dying，dying！\"
Hehearditdistinctly。Whereweretheygoingto，allthosepeople？
Helaydownquickly，andpulledthecoverupoverhishead：butpresentlythesilkycurlsreappeared。
\"Dying，dying，dying！\"saidthewatch；\"dying，dying，dying！\"
Hethoughtofthewordshisfatherhadreadthatevening——\"Forwideisthegate，andbroadistheway，thatleadethtodestructionandmanytherebewhichgointhereat。\"
\"Many，many，many！\"saidthewatch。
\"Becausestraitisthegate，andnarrowistheway，thatleadethuntolife，andfewtherebethatfindit。\"
\"Few，few，few！\"saidthewatch。
Theboylaywithhiseyeswideopen。Hesawbeforehimalongstreamofpeople，agreatdarkmultitude，thatmovedinonedirection；thentheycametothedarkedgeoftheworldandwentover。Hesawthempassingonbeforehim，andtherewasnothingthatcouldstopthem。Hethoughtofhowthatstreamhadrolledonthroughallthelongagesofthepast——howtheoldGreeksandRomanshadgoneover；thecountlessmillionsofChinaandIndia，theyweregoingovernow。Sincehehadcometobed，howmanyhadgone！
Andthewatchsaid，\"Eternity，eternity，eternity！\"
\"Stopthem！stopthem！\"criedthechild。
Andallthewhilethewatchkepttickingon；justlikeGod’swill，thatneverchangesoralters，youmaydowhatyouplease。
Greatbeadsofperspirationstoodontheboy’sforehead。Heclimbedoutofbedandlaywithhisfaceturnedtothemudfloor。
\"Oh，God，God！savethem！\"hecriedinagony。\"Onlysome，onlyafew！
OnlyforeachmomentIamprayinghereone！\"Hefoldedhislittlehandsuponhishead。\"God！God！savethem！\"
Hegrovelledonthefloor。
Oh，thelong，longagesofthepast，inwhichtheyhadgoneover！Oh，thelong，longfuture，inwhichtheywouldpassaway！Oh，God！thelong，long，longeternity，whichhasnoend！
Thechildwept，andcreptclosertotheground……
TheSacrifice。
Thefarmbydaylightwasnotasthefarmbymoonlight。Theplainwasawearyflatoflooseredsand，sparselycoveredbydrykaroobushes，thatcrackedbeneaththetreadliketinder，andshowedtheredeartheverywhere。
Hereandthereamilk—bushlifteditspale—colouredrods，andineverydirectiontheantsandbeetlesranaboutintheblazingsand。Theredwallsofthefarmhouse，thezincroofsoftheoutbuildings，thestonewallsofthekraals，allreflectedthefiercesunlight，tilltheeyeachedandblenched。Notreeorshrubwastobeseenfarornear。Thetwosunflowersthatstoodbeforethedoor，out—staredbythesun，droopedtheirbrazenfacestothesand；andthelittlecicada—likeinsectscriedaloudamongthestonesofthekopje。
TheBoer—woman，seenbydaylight，wasevenlesslovelythanwhen，inbed，sherolledanddreamed。Shesatonachairinthegreatfrontroom，withherfeetonawoodenstove，andwipedherflatfacewiththecornerofherapron，anddrankcoffee，andinCapeDutchsworethatthebelovedweatherwasdamned。Lesslovely，too，bydaylightwasthedeadEnglishman’schild，herlittlestepdaughter，uponwhosefrecklesandlow，wrinkledforeheadthesunlighthadnomercy。
\"Lyndall，\"thechildsaidtoherlittleorphancousin，whosatwithheronthefloorthreadingbeads，\"howisityourbeadsneverfalloffyourneedle？\"
\"Itry，\"saidthelittleonegravely，moisteninghertinyfinger。\"Thatiswhy。\"
Theoverseer，seenbydaylight，wasahugeGerman，wearingashabbysuit，andwithachildishhabitofrubbinghishandsandnoddinghisheadprodigiouslywhenpleasedatanything。Hestoodoutatthekraalsintheblazingsun，explainingtotwoKafferboystheapproachingendoftheworld。Theboys，astheycutthecakesofdung，winkedateachother，andworkedasslowlyastheypossiblycould；buttheGermanneversawit。
Away，beyondthekopje，Waldohissonherdedtheewesandlambs——asmallanddustyherd——powderedalloverfromheadtofootwithredsand，wearingaraggedcoatandshoesofundressedleather，throughwhoseholesthetoeslookedout。Hishatwastoolarge，andhadsunkdowntohiseyes，concealingcompletelythesilkyblackcurls。Itwasacurioussmallfigure。Hisflockgavehimlittletrouble。Itwastoohotforthemtomovefar；theygatheredroundeverylittlemilk—bush，asthoughtheyhopedtofindshade，andstoodtheremotionlessinclumps。Hehimselfcreptunderashelvingrockthatlayatthefootofthekopje，stretchedhimselfonhisstomach，andwavedhisdilapidatedlittleshoesintheair。
Soon，fromthebluebagwherehekepthisdinner，heproducedafragmentofslate，anarithmetic，andapencil。Proceedingtoputdownasumwithsolemnandearnestdemeanour，hebegantoadditupaloud：\"Sixandtwoiseight——andfouristwelve——andtwoisfourteen——andfouriseighteen。\"
Herehepaused。\"Andfouriseighteen——and——four——is——eighteen。\"Thelastwasverymuchdrawled。Slowlythepencilslippedfromhisfingers，andtheslatefolloweditintothesand。Forawhilehelaymotionless，thenbeganmutteringtohimself，foldedhislittlearms，laidhisheaddownuponthem，andmighthavebeenasleep，butforthemutteringsoundthatfromtimetotimeproceededfromhim。Acuriousoldewecametosniffathim；butitwaslongbeforeheraisedhishead。Whenhedid，helookedatthefar—offhillswithhisheavyeyes。
\"Yeshallreceive——yeshallreceive——shall，shall，shall，\"hemuttered。
Hesatupthen。Slowlythedulnessandheavinessmeltedfromhisface；itbecameradiant。Middayhadcomenow，andthesun’srayswerepoureddownvertically；theearththrobbedbeforetheeye。
Theboystoodupquickly，andclearedasmallspacefromthebusheswhichcoveredit。Lookingcarefully，hefoundtwelvesmallstonesofsomewhatthesamesize；kneelingdown，hearrangedthemcarefullyontheclearedspaceinasquarepile，inshapelikeanaltar。Thenhewalkedtothebagwherehisdinnerwaskept；initwasamuttonchopandalargesliceofbrownbread。Theboytookthemoutandturnedthebreadoverinhishand，deeplyconsideringit。Finallyhethrewitawayandwalkedtothealtarwiththemeat，andlaiditdownonthestones。Closebyintheredsandhekneltdown。Sure，neversincethebeginningoftheworldwastheresoraggedandsosmallapriest。Hetookoffhisgreathatandplaceditsolemnlyontheground，thenclosedhiseyesandfoldedhishands。Heprayedaloud：
\"Oh，God，myFather，IhavemadeTheeasacrifice。Ihaveonlytwopence，soIcannotbuyalamb。Ifthelambsweremine，IwouldgiveTheeone；butnowIhaveonlythismeat；itismydinnermeat。Please，myFather，sendfiredownfromheaventoburnit。Thouhastsaid，Whosoevershallsayuntothismountain，Bethoucastintothesea，nothingdoubting，itshallbedone。IaskforthesakeofJesusChrist。Amen。\"
Hekneltdownwithhisfaceupontheground，andhefoldedhishandsuponhiscurls。Thefiercesunpoureddownitsheatuponhisheadanduponhisaltar。Whenhelookedupheknewwhatheshouldsee——thegloryofGod！
Forfearhisveryheartstoodstill，hisbreathcameheavily；hewashalfsuffocated。Hedarednotlookup。Thenatlastheraisedhimself。Abovehimwasthequietbluesky，abouthimtheredearth；thereweretheclumpsofsilentewesandhisaltar——thatwasall。
Helookedup——nothingbroketheintensestillnessoftheblueoverhead。Helookedroundinastonishment，thenhebowedagain，andthistimelongerthanbefore。
Whenheraisedhimselfthesecondtimeallwasunaltered。Onlythesunhadmeltedthefatofthelittlemuttonchop，anditrandownuponthestones。
Then，thethirdtimehebowedhimself。Whenatlasthelookedup，someantshadcometothemeatonthealtar。Hestoodupanddrovethemaway。
Thenheputhishatonhishotcurls，andsatintheshade。Heclaspedhishandsabouthisknees。Hesattowatchwhatwouldcometopass。ThegloryoftheLordGodAlmighty！Heknewheshouldseeit。
\"MydearGodistryingme，\"hesaid；andhesattherethroughthefierceheatoftheafternoon。Stillhewatchedandwaitedwhenthesunbegantoslope，andwhenitnearedthehorizonandthesheepbegantocastlongshadowsacrossthekaroo，hestillsatthere。Hehopedwhenthefirstraystouchedthehillstillthesundippedbehindthemandwasgone。Thenhecalledhisewestogether，andbrokedownthealtar，andthrewthemeatfar，farawayintothefield。
Hewalkedhomebehindhisflock。Hisheartwasheavy。Hereasonedso：
\"Godcannotlie。Ihadfaith。Nofirecame。IamlikeCain——IamnotHis。Hewillnothearmyprayer。Godhatesme。\"
Theboy’sheartwasheavy。Whenhereachedthekraalgatethetwogirlsmethim。
\"Come，\"saidtheyellow—hairedEm，\"letusplaycoop。\"Thereisstilltimebeforeitgetsquitedark。You，Waldo，goandhideonthekopje；LyndallandIwillshuteyeshere，andwewillnotlook。\"
Thegirlshidtheirfacesinthestonewallofthesheep—kraal，andtheboyclamberedhalfwayupthekopje。Hecroucheddownbetweentwostonesandgavethecall。Justthenthemilk—herdcamewalkingoutofthecow—kraalwithtwopails。Hewasanill—lookingKaffer。
\"Ah！\"thoughttheboy，\"perhapshewilldietonight，andgotohell！I
mustprayforhim，Imustpray！\"
Thenhethought——\"WhereamIgoingto？\"andheprayeddesperately。
\"Ah！thisisnotrightatall，\"littleEmsaid，peepingbetweenthestones，andfindinghiminaverycuriousposture。\"WhatareyoudoingWaldo？Itisnottheplay，youknow。Youshouldrunoutwhenwecometothewhitestone。Ah，youdonotplaynicely。\"
\"I——Iwillplaynicelynow，\"saidtheboy，comingoutandstandingsheepishlybeforethem；\"I——Ionlyforgot；Iwillplaynow。\"
\"Hehasbeentosleep，\"saidfreckledEm。
\"No，\"saidbeautifullittleLyndall，lookingcuriouslyathim：\"hehasbeencrying。\"
Shenevermadeamistake……
TheConfession。
Onenight，twoyearsafter，theboysataloneonthekopje。Hehadcreptsoftlyfromhisfather’sroomandcomethere。Heoftendid，because，whenheprayedorcriedaloud，hisfathermightawakeandhearhim；andnoneknewhisgreatsorrow，andnoneknewhisgrief，buthehimself，andheburiedthemdeepinhisheart。
Heturnedupthebrimofhisgreathatandlookedatthemoon，butmostattheleavesofthepricklypearthatgrewjustbeforehim。Theyglinted，andglinted，andglinted，justlikehisownheart——cold，sohard，andverywicked。Hisphysicalhearthadpainalso；itseemedfulloflittlebitsofglass，thathurt。Hehadsatthereforhalfanhour，andhedarednotgobacktotheclosehouse。
Hefelthorriblylonely。Therewasnotonethingsowickedasheinalltheworld，andheknewit。Hefoldedhisarmsandbegantocry——notaloud；
hesobbedwithoutmakinganysound，andhistearsleftscorchedmarkswheretheyfell。Hecouldnotpray；hehadprayednightanddayforsomanymonths；andtonighthecouldnotpray。Whenheleftoffcrying，heheldhisachingheadwithhisbrownhands。Ifonemighthavegoneuptohimandtouchedhimkindly；poor，uglylittlething！Perhapshisheartwasalmostbroken。
Withhisswolleneyeshesatthereonaflatstoneattheverytopofthekopje；andthetree，witheveryoneofitswickedleaves，blinked，andblinked，andblinkedathim。Presentlyhebegantocryagain，andthenstoppedhiscryingtolookatit。Hewasquietforalongwhile，thenhekneltupslowlyandbentforward。Therewasasecrethehadcarriedinhisheartforayear。Hehadnotdaredtolookatit；hehadnotwhisperedittohimself，butforayearhehadcarriedit。\"IhateGod！\"hesaid。Thewindtookthewordsandranawaywiththem，amongthestones，andthroughtheleavesofthepricklypear。Hethoughtitdiedawayhalfdownthekopje。Hehadtolditnow！
\"IloveJesusChrist，butIhateGod。\"
Thewindcarriedawaythatsoundasithaddonethefirst。Thenhegotupandbuttonedhisoldcoatabouthim。Heknewhewascertainlylostnow；hedidnotcare。Ifhalftheworldweretobelost，whynothetoo？Hewouldnotprayformercyanymore。Betterso——bettertoknowcertainly。Itwasendednow。Betterso。
Hebeganscramblingdownthesidesofthekopjetogohome。
Betterso！Butoh，theloneliness，theagonizedpain！forthatnight，andfornightsonnightstocome！Theanguishthatsleepsalldayontheheartlikeaheavyworm，andwakesupatnighttofeed！
TherearesomeofuswhoinafteryearssaytoFate，\"Nowdealusyourhardestblow，giveuswhatyouwill；butletusneveragainsufferaswesufferedwhenwewerechildren。\"
Thebarbinthearrowofchildhood’ssufferingisthis：itsintenseloneliness，itsintenseagony。
